all JOKES translation - STALKER Shadow of Chernobyl

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  • Опубліковано 20 тра 2024
  • all JOKES translation - STALKER Shadow of Chernobyl
    Special thanks for the translation:
    Akim Antonov - captainfixprice
    Woland - / translated_campfire_jo...
    S.T.A.L.K.E.R. - campfire jokes | English subtitles
    S.T.A.L.K.E.R. - campfire jokes | English translation
    Stalker Jokes english translated - Shadow of Chernobyl | Soc
    0:00 Bandits
    1:32 Loners
    5:18 Military
    6:49 Duty
    7:39 Freedom
  • Ігри

КОМЕНТАРІ • 783

  • @behroozkhaleghirad
    @behroozkhaleghirad 2 роки тому +4356

    That joke about mercenaries shoving loner in water was actually good made me laugh 😄

    • @lonewaffle231
      @lonewaffle231 2 роки тому +279

      Yeah thats the best one hands down

    • @elizataylor1726
      @elizataylor1726 2 роки тому +386

      I'm like 90% sure it's a reference to "The big lebowski" where they dunk him in the toilet and keep asking "where's the money" and he comes back with basically the same thing

    • @Pllayer064
      @Pllayer064 2 роки тому +15

      *Wheeze*

    • @dragonator36
      @dragonator36 2 роки тому

      "WHERES THE ARTIFACT LEBOWSKY?! WHERES THE FUCKING MONEY SHITHEAAAD!"

    • @VrrVolcano
      @VrrVolcano 2 роки тому +5

      same here😂

  • @imionfamilin7057
    @imionfamilin7057 2 роки тому +1272

    One cool detail is that they recorded the same jokes several times with different voices, and some tell the jokes very artistically, with good intonations, while others tell the jokes intentionally bad, too monotonously, with bad timing, which makes good jokes sound bad and bad jokes sound good

    • @ryszakowy
      @ryszakowy 2 роки тому +60

      and at ;east two jokes about mutants taking dumps in cars...

    • @NucleaRaptor
      @NucleaRaptor 2 роки тому +83

      Even in the Zone, delivery matters.

    • @timofiy98
      @timofiy98 Рік тому +62

      not only that, but there are some jokes that are told a little differently depending on what faction tells them, like being variations of the same base joke

    • @user-db5zc1nf4b
      @user-db5zc1nf4b Рік тому +1

      @@timofiy98 yes

    • @thundergaming155
      @thundergaming155 Рік тому +3

      So basically true comedy.

  • @jeantoor7103
    @jeantoor7103 2 роки тому +3105

    I believe jokes were intentionaly bad and clumsy. To make contrast between harsh stalker life routine and rare moments of rest more intense, to show that these people are so exhausted by the Zone and the need to constantly be in suspense to survive, and now they sincerely laugh at even the most stupid and childish jokes. I'd like to think there's no dark or cruel jokes, because they will not be tolerated in community of stalkers. As for the controller image in jokes, I believe these gags were added in early stages of development, when devs had huge plans about AI system, which included neutral monsters with who player could interact outside of combat, like said controller, or scrapped "Izlom" mutant.

    • @healLV
      @healLV 2 роки тому +127

      yeah many of those jokes feel like they are from early development phases

    • @dovydaslevanavicius9050
      @dovydaslevanavicius9050 2 роки тому +229

      @@healLV especially the jokes with cars.

    • @healLV
      @healLV 2 роки тому +22

      @@dovydaslevanavicius9050 yeah those

    • @zenothemeano4381
      @zenothemeano4381 2 роки тому +70

      I think you are looking into this for some sort of depth when there clearly is none and the most simple answer, that being that it was a clearly rushed script line rather than meant to convey any legitimate depth and that they are just making jokes the writers clearly didn't know how to write and that you don't want to admit the times the creators may have made a mistake in their work which you idolize, not trying to diss quite on the contrary actually, I see a lot of fans do this regarding art they are deeply passionate about and usually for good reason, so much so they tend to add onto the world that was already created which further gives the game more meaning to fans.

    • @synx5196
      @synx5196 2 роки тому +83

      or rather that controllers are very legendary, rare, and gravely feared creatures that obviously are very similar to humans so of course people would personify them for comedies sake

  • @tonny8881
    @tonny8881 2 роки тому +803

    The bandit grenade joke is pretty good

    • @demonjmh
      @demonjmh Рік тому +40

      Yeah I thought it was funnier than the well joke everyone seems to think was hilarious

    • @psilobom
      @psilobom 6 місяців тому +15

      Oh the classic capitalist joke. Sell you a problem for $50, and the solution for $500.

  • @zoneoperator1419
    @zoneoperator1419 2 роки тому +1062

    A STALKER goes to see a doctor;
    "doctor! I haven't had a good sleep in weeks! I have a terrible fear that snorks are hiding under my bed and when I go to sleep they'll jump out and kill me!"
    The doctor tells him:
    "I can fix that phobia for you, but not overnight. It's gonna take many therapy sessions and I charge a lot per session."
    The STALKER says he'll think it over, but never returns.
    Some time later the doctor is on a supply run and he sees the STALKER, he goes up to him and says
    "I remember you, you had that terrible phobia did you ever get any relief?"
    The STALKER tells him "I told my bartender about it, he solved my problems in five minutes."
    Obviously skeptical - the doctor asks how a bartender solved the problem?
    "My bartender told me to cut the legs off my bed."

  • @smrtt92
    @smrtt92 2 роки тому +329

    Oh fuck I laughed at almost every one. Here's an old military one.
    In the Balkans, the enemy turned an AA gun against the infantry charge, those 3 barrel 20mm ones.
    The private asks "comrade captain what the fuck is shooting at us?!".
    "It is an AA gun!!!"
    The recruit answers "Do I look like a fucking plane!?"
    Context is that very beautiful (and usually expensive) women were called airplanes, and places where really cute girls hanged out were called airports.

    • @snaek2594
      @snaek2594 2 роки тому +60

      I think the joke is lost in translation haha. But thank you for sharing

    • @Myuutsuu85
      @Myuutsuu85 Рік тому +54

      Funnily enough it even works without the context. Soldier complaining, even if just silently for himself, "Do I look like a plane to you?" after noticing he is shot at by AA guns is something I can easily see happening.

  • @EmbeddedWithin
    @EmbeddedWithin 2 роки тому +545

    4:05 I can agree with this person. I am a veteran stalker and have been in the zone as much years as how much fingers I have! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17!

    • @Edario
      @Edario 2 роки тому +48

      Heheheheehahahaaaa... Blyyyaaatt 😂😂

    • @buslaat9974
      @buslaat9974 2 роки тому +7

      Haha ha !

    • @CarefreeMan
      @CarefreeMan 2 роки тому

      *Hah, that was good, блять!*

    • @TheManeymon
      @TheManeymon Рік тому

      hahaha good one

    • @vipahxxx7640
      @vipahxxx7640 9 місяців тому +2

      Hahahaha that's what i call a joke!

  • @ProbInsane
    @ProbInsane 2 роки тому +575

    I like how free stalkers are usually the ones in the joke. They're just seen as some goofy dudes wandering around the zone getting into shenanigans.

    • @zorkitipafed4626
      @zorkitipafed4626 2 роки тому

      Yeah. Despite the fact that the real buch of doggy-dog wankers here are Freedom.

    • @tuamaputanna2897
      @tuamaputanna2897 2 роки тому +11

      it reminds me a lot of the italian police jokes.

    • @user-je2pc7cu8v
      @user-je2pc7cu8v 2 роки тому +7

      @@tuamaputanna2897 What's the joke?

    • @elliswatanabe
      @elliswatanabe 2 роки тому +97

      @@user-je2pc7cu8v the italian police

    • @cristianolaboureur5999
      @cristianolaboureur5999 Рік тому +6

      @@elliswatanabe lmao...
      Fuck, it's true.

  • @ratsxz.
    @ratsxz. 2 роки тому +288

    Duty: Hahaha your joke is so funny
    10 seconds later
    Duty: Bro shut up its not good at all

    • @Th3M4k40n
      @Th3M4k40n 2 роки тому +38

      I know right I felt so bad for the guy lol

    • @nagabe6394
      @nagabe6394 Рік тому +16

      They only have two jokes dialogues, the classic No Fun Allowed Duty

  • @halolime117
    @halolime117 2 роки тому +433

    Some jokes are “clumsy” because well let’s be real, the stalkers in game are not exactly 20 years old xD Lots of old folk humour imo

    • @snowi9585
      @snowi9585 2 роки тому +17

      the true skill is to understand all types of humour.

    • @hi5yearsago392
      @hi5yearsago392 Рік тому +10

      Also overall Slavic humor is different
      Like Зачем нужно жрать капуста если есть картошка
      Why eat cabbage when you have potatoes

    • @rafox66
      @rafox66 Рік тому +5

      Older humour is better anyway, things like Monty Python.

    • @vornamenachname594
      @vornamenachname594 5 місяців тому +1

      @@rafox66 disagree

    • @arsontheblufrog5941
      @arsontheblufrog5941 5 місяців тому

      Most stalkers were born in the 70s i believe

  • @Ricky-ce3jo
    @Ricky-ce3jo 2 роки тому +2011

    2:01 Actually had me laughing pretty hard

  • @epicdoge6276
    @epicdoge6276 2 роки тому +1001

    It's a great detail that at the bad jokes none of them laugh and start complaining and at the good jokes they all laugh. I always wondered why they laugh and things like that but never knew the answer. Thanks for the video man

    • @user-ww3kx4ri7f
      @user-ww3kx4ri7f 2 роки тому +107

      I think its a video thing, like author of the video made is specifically that way, in original video game sometimes stalker would react differently on the same jokes, its easier to understand this for russian-speaking players

    • @epicdoge6276
      @epicdoge6276 2 роки тому +24

      @@user-ww3kx4ri7f didn't know that. It's still an awesome detail that characters talk to each other like in other games they only talk with themselves but in stalker they talk with each other like question and answer type of thing

    • @yobrethren
      @yobrethren 2 роки тому +43

      The answer to a joke isn't dependant on a joke, it's just RNG which voice line will the stalker play

    • @airshark2764
      @airshark2764 2 роки тому +1

      i found only the bandit jokes legit, others not much

    • @jurayneskazu64
      @jurayneskazu64 2 роки тому +16

      it just a video. In game reactions rather random. Stalkers sometimes can even say "so not funny" or "good joke" or "is there nothing newer?" without any joke said before.

  • @swindle9695
    @swindle9695 2 роки тому +315

    Okay the one about the mercenaries dunking the loner was actually pretty funny, not gonna lie.

    • @demonjmh
      @demonjmh Рік тому +3

      I dont see why everyone likes that one

    • @The-jy3yq
      @The-jy3yq Рік тому +20

      @@demonjmh the delivery
      + the actor sounds very good, unlike many others
      And he ain't talking like a bandit

  • @Broken_Savior
    @Broken_Savior 2 роки тому +938

    It feels really good to just hear them laugh. Imagine being plunged into the deepest depths of horror, and still being able to laugh.
    I'm happy they have each other to rely on out there. I sometimes find myself too caught up in everything to appreciate it.
    Also some of those Loner ones are seriously golden.

    • @MrProboina
      @MrProboina 2 роки тому +48

      That's how Slavic mentality is. I havea couple of russian bros and they always say that if they cannot do anything to change the world to be a better place - at least they can laugh about it. Helps to cope :D

    • @h4t3clu83
      @h4t3clu83 2 роки тому +7

      @@MrProboina yes, even in connection with recent events, this is more relevant than ever

    • @Broken_Savior
      @Broken_Savior 2 роки тому +4

      @@MrProboina True. Whining about strife does nothing for nobody, least of all yourself. In the case that one cannot remedy the problem to any significant degree, laughing in the face of terror does a lot more than people realize, for both yourself and those around you.
      Did you have a favorite one? Personally, the Mercenaries torturing the Loner had me in stitches.

    • @MrProboina
      @MrProboina 2 роки тому +12

      @@Broken_Savior I like the one about pubs and girls, especially because in original stalker trilogy there are no female npc's, feels like devs are making fun of themselves for that and that's wholesome

    • @Broken_Savior
      @Broken_Savior 2 роки тому +6

      @@MrProboina Mm! Agreed! That one was fairly cheeky of them. A very "I see what you did there" moment.
      It is not among the best this video has to offer, but the one about the howling Stalker, yelling for help and unintentionally attracting a mutant was entertaining. Less so in a funny way, but more in a black "be careful what you wish for" kind of way.
      The fact that any of these are good enough to entertain is actually quite remarkable. Countless franchises attempt to inject casual lingo and humor into NPC dialogue, and more often than not, it comes off as cringe at best. Whereas here, even the bad jokes are voiced and written (speaking of writing I am aware this is a slightly accurate translation into English) well enough to come off as sincere and believable. Bravo, GSC.

  • @minihalkoja590
    @minihalkoja590 2 роки тому +144

    Gotta say that the Loner's joke about 2 mercs dipping the stalker into a well was actually able to make me laugh.

    • @OperatorMax1993
      @OperatorMax1993 Рік тому +9

      Oh yeah, I actually found that joke genuinely hilarious
      Made me think of The Big Lebowski with the toilet dipping scene as 'The Dude' goes "it's down there somewhere, let me take another look"

    • @nisoyl
      @nisoyl 10 місяців тому

      same here hahahahaha

  • @MonoChorMe
    @MonoChorMe Рік тому +326

    The voice actor (example in the 2:01 joke) is my favorite. He legitimately tells the joke(s) using proper intonations and with applied character. Makes me laugh all the time. 😄

    • @TMCProductions
      @TMCProductions 9 місяців тому +21

      Khan's voice actor from the Metro series

    • @DeagleSpear
      @DeagleSpear 4 місяці тому +2

      Yes, I like this nostalgic videos for S.T.A.L.K.E.R.

    • @Syaralaayu
      @Syaralaayu 4 місяці тому +1

      That's... The point of voice acting

    • @MonoChorMe
      @MonoChorMe 4 місяці тому +1

      @@Syaralaayu Exactly! Its just that his personality in particular has a specific charm to it (as he announces the jokes) the reason I'm saying this is because i understand Russian and i can interpret the meaning behind them. The English translation is good - but listening to it natively is on a whole different level.

    • @evilharebunny
      @evilharebunny 3 місяці тому +1

      This actor is still voicing different things in Ukraine. His name is Oleg Stalchuk. Of the key characters in Stalker, he voiced Lebedev, the leader of Clear Sky

  • @csordaslevente7053
    @csordaslevente7053 2 роки тому +242

    After so many years... WE FINALLY KNOW THE TRUTH!!!

  • @ryszakowy
    @ryszakowy 2 роки тому +216

    - army major came to the zone for an inspection. Some things shocked him, some made him wonder and some... he took with him.
    - small bloodsucker says "dad, dad do the stalkers" a big bloodsucker grabs two skulls and says "-you sure those tunnels are safe vayna? - yeah i'm sure"

    • @BekindBekbek
      @BekindBekbek 2 роки тому +49

      It's "and some things... was stolen from him")

    • @buslaat9974
      @buslaat9974 2 роки тому +4

      Good jokes

    • @SMT-ks8yp
      @SMT-ks8yp Рік тому +31

      The bloodsucker one is underplayed. It actually goes like this:
      The old bloodsucker grabs two skulls and says with a squeaky voice:
      "Petrovich, do you think there are bloodsuckers in here?"
      And the second skull answers with a basso:
      "No way, Semyonych, how the f**k there can be bloodsuckers?"
      (Petrovich and Semyonych are patronyms, and they can be used like this among friends)

    • @user-tc9sk4ei9y
      @user-tc9sk4ei9y Рік тому +3

      Btw the first joke is the reference to an old russian commercial

    • @JunkCCCP
      @JunkCCCP 6 місяців тому +2

      There's a Far Side comic by Gary Larson that's this exact joke, but with bears and a pair of hunters skulls

  • @Pllayer064
    @Pllayer064 2 роки тому +394

    8:00 damn these jokes really hold the finger on the pulse of what a miserable experience the life of a stalker is and how traumatised they are to the point of being unable to return to normal life.

    • @zorkitipafed4626
      @zorkitipafed4626 2 роки тому +79

      Most of the jokes in S.T.A.L.K.E.R. are inspired by Tsaristic Russia's/Soviet Russia's anecdotes, that's why they are so suitable.

    • @user-pm3wk6lw6m
      @user-pm3wk6lw6m Рік тому +21

      This particular take I'd not the best in game, some jokes are told by all groups but slightly different. I think the best one is the Loners it ends like "Sounds familiar, but I can't put my finger on it... Next time in camp I should ask the guys what the heck is "girls and pubs". Also, here in Freedom's take it actually goes like " Gotta ask Freedom guys, what is this new scary thing - girls and pubs" implying that Freedom thinks they have the best time in Zone.

  • @jurayneskazu64
    @jurayneskazu64 2 роки тому +181

    Part of Stalker jokes are Zone adaptation of IRL jokes.
    Mercs drowning stalker - was joke about bandits of wild 90s (or ever of Russian Civil War times).
    Yelling stalker and beast - tourist and bear.
    Duty (or military - there is such variant) ambush and drunk stalker - factory security and worker-thief.
    "Radiation is no problem" - about real Chernobyl NPP accident.
    Brick and zombie - old joke about untolerance to some ethnic minority.
    In the other two Stalker games are talks about Duty and Freedom based on jokes about police and narcomans.

  • @Sormyr
    @Sormyr 2 роки тому +167

    3:55 This laugh right here. I never knew what they were talking about, but this laugh always made me fall off my chair laughing.

    • @zorkitipafed4626
      @zorkitipafed4626 2 роки тому +29

      I like the way how Freedom dudes laugh. It is very accurate to the cannabis intoxication, which is common thing for them. Really feels that they just ripped a few joints.

    • @peternehemiah1606
      @peternehemiah1606 2 роки тому +14

      6:16 this too
      Made me lose it everytime I hear it

  • @Blind_Hawk
    @Blind_Hawk 2 роки тому +101

    The first bandit joke made me laugh because the delivery was so good. "What what? I don't remember" it's more charming when you understand the language.

    • @DeagleSpear
      @DeagleSpear 4 місяці тому +2

      Yes, I live in Russia 🇷🇺
      This joke in Russian language is very funny

  • @cherrydragon4109
    @cherrydragon4109 2 роки тому +951

    Я даже не думал, что в английской версии не перевели разговоры и анекдоты. Теперь я рад за англоязычных игроков.

    • @mazila5677
      @mazila5677 2 роки тому +10

      +

    • @user-pi4jh7bb3g
      @user-pi4jh7bb3g 2 роки тому +227

      Всегда удивляло, что у сталкера есть фаны не из снг, учитывая, что добрая половина той самой атмосферы проебана ленивым переводом.

    • @EldarKillToz
      @EldarKillToz 2 роки тому +99

      Жалко только тут перевод местами совсем поверхностный и во многом не передает точный смысл и текст. Но хоть что-то для англоязычного коммьюнити

    • @spazemfathemcazemmeleggymi272
      @spazemfathemcazemmeleggymi272 2 роки тому +44

      @@user-pi4jh7bb3g even with the steam version the atmosphere is quite good! I'm sure it's probably better to someone who live in the culture to understand it but even without it's not bad♥️

    • @VolunieProductionsOfficial
      @VolunieProductionsOfficial 2 роки тому +17

      Ище раз подтверждаем, что Сталкер 2 может жить без «великих русских игроков».

  • @wojszach4443
    @wojszach4443 2 роки тому +115

    some of them are pretty good, especially ones about controllers, it shows what people fear most, and therefore make best jokes about

  • @Darknessblade4me
    @Darknessblade4me 2 роки тому +46

    The first military is a "zone" version of another joke thats about a man lost in the forest.
    Basically it goes something like this: A man is lost in the woods after stumbling around for a while he decides to just yell for help.
    a bear comes to him and asks "Dude why are you screaming like crazy?"
    "I´m lost so i hoped somebody will find me when i yelled loud enough" he replies
    The bear sighs and goes "Well i found you, now what?"

  • @maximilienrobespierre7927
    @maximilienrobespierre7927 2 роки тому +58

    Interesting to note, Loner, Duty and Freedom factions share the same jokes, just voiced by different voice actors with very minor variations on how exactly the joke is told. For example, I certainly remember the "Guy stepped into Springboard anomaly and learned to fly" joke and the "Monsters ok, Zombies ok, but why be scared of us Controllers?" joke told by some Loners.
    I also remember how the Loner version of that last joke differs - in the Loner version, the ending goes something like "Okay, I can understand the zombies... But why would you insult us Controllers by calling us monsters?"

  • @JustJames533
    @JustJames533 2 роки тому +69

    If you laughed at the jokes, youre a certified stalker.
    If you didnt, you havent spent enough time in the zone to understand.

    • @JustJames533
      @JustJames533 2 роки тому +3

      Im gonna spend more time in the zone

    • @OperatorMax1993
      @OperatorMax1993 Рік тому +1

      I'm sure we all did, especially at the one with the Mercs dipping the Loner

  • @dolphinerofachero3159
    @dolphinerofachero3159 2 роки тому +96

    I love how stalkers say the jokes are bad

  • @mvrkinlink7416
    @mvrkinlink7416 3 місяці тому +3

    04:20 Even the humming in the background laughed

  • @MEYanZav
    @MEYanZav Рік тому +45

    The language is really colourful and full of slang that makes bandits sound like bandits, loners sound like loners and so on. A translation won't convey that unfortunately.

  • @AbysmalArticus
    @AbysmalArticus 2 роки тому +31

    The joke at 5:20 is actually a pretty common cautionary tale for kids in Russia, kinda like “the boy who cried wolf” story.

    • @c1nquedea47
      @c1nquedea47 Рік тому +2

      the boy who cried wolf is an cautionary tale in which a boy was screaming for help that a wolf was attacking him. once the whole village came to the rescue, the second time they came. for the third time no one believed, but this time the boy was really attacked by a wolf and died.

    • @c1nquedea47
      @c1nquedea47 Рік тому

      мораль шо нехуй пиздеть

    • @YA_LUNNAYA_PONI
      @YA_LUNNAYA_PONI 6 місяців тому

      nah it's a modified "bear" joke. like literally that one, but instead of a hunter it's a stalker

  • @keith3761
    @keith3761 Рік тому +14

    “Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's cant remember who he is. Says The Zone seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says, "Treatment is simple. Great Stalker Strelok is in village tonight. Go and see him. He should know who you are." Man bursts into tears. Says, "But doctor...I am Strelok .” - Monolith Joke.

  • @Darudeen
    @Darudeen 2 роки тому +88

    I have a Stalker Joke! Two Mercenaries walk into the Bar...
    And they get shot by Duty.

    • @MrBlack75922
      @MrBlack75922 2 роки тому +8

      hahaha i know that guy

    • @cecilsmith2061
      @cecilsmith2061 2 роки тому +17

      I also have a Stalker joke! Two Freedomers walk into a bar. The first Freedomer complains, saying "Hey, this isn't our usual spot!" The second replies, "Aw, Vesna, where is your sense of adventure?" As they sit down, holstering their weapons, they're greeted. "So what'll you have for drinks?" asks a Controller.

    • @TheR00k
      @TheR00k 2 роки тому +8

      Deadly anomalies, dangerous mutants, anarchists and bandits... None of them will stop Duty when Duty's being chased by stalker Petrov

    • @Wyatt0987654321
      @Wyatt0987654321 2 роки тому +4

      @@TheR00k Boo get new material

    • @TheR00k
      @TheR00k 2 роки тому +14

      @@Wyatt0987654321 One day Duty recruited stalker Petrov to their ranks.
      "What do I need to do?" asked Petrov
      "Shoot mutants" said the recruiter
      Next morning stalker Petrov shot the mirror in the bathroom. Said there was a real scary mutant there

  • @keijo8238
    @keijo8238 2 роки тому +23

    A lot of controller jokes, probably because they look somewhat human. Also might be because stalkers are terribly scared of them and try to ease their fears by joking about them.

    • @MonoChorMe
      @MonoChorMe Рік тому +4

      Anecdotally, the jokes were voiced during the time when the first builds of the game were constructed, therefore controllers and "Izloms"/"Fractures" had the ability to speak and you could interact with them (like a typical NPC)... But that was ultimately scrapped and they went with them being pure basic mutants.

  • @Ajoura
    @Ajoura 9 місяців тому +6

    Some people do tell jokes monotonously, but someone do it with proper intonations and in-character.
    Here's a Russian meta-joke for you on this matter.
    A man ends up in prison. He quickly gets acquainted with his cellmates, and starts adapting to his new lifestyle.
    At one point, the convicts gather to tell jokes.
    One of them stands up and says: "21!" Everybody laughs.
    Then the other stands up and says: "47!" Eveybody laughs again.
    The man gets confused and asks the local boss, what's this about.
    The boss tells him: "You know, we've been telling all those jokes so many times, we've remembered and numbered every single one. So we simply name the number, and everybody understands."
    "So interesting," the man says. After everybody laughed once again at another numbered joke, the man himself says: "60!"
    But nothing happens. No one's laughing.
    The man gets obviously confused and asks the boss: "But why didn't they laugh?"
    And the boss says:
    "Eh, you just have to know how to tell jokes..."

  • @thelightside77
    @thelightside77 2 роки тому +49

    Some were actually horror stories and i like there are different reactions to a joke as well.

  • @ramadhani201
    @ramadhani201 2 роки тому +271

    Oh hey you actually made it! Epic
    Ive been waiting for this
    Some of these jokes are actually really good i wont lie
    They actually made me laugh hard
    The rest are wack
    Also, weird seeing a controller being mentioned several times and all of them seems to be neutral or even friendly to other stalkers
    Final edit: i notice the "stalker: shadow of chernobyl" in the title, does that mean youre planning to translate the jokes on clear sky and call of pripyat as well? That would be awesome dude

    • @Es-zb8vu
      @Es-zb8vu 2 роки тому +19

      Shuba

    • @ramadhani201
      @ramadhani201 2 роки тому +9

      @@Es-zb8vu duck

    • @InfinityPotato97
      @InfinityPotato97 2 роки тому

      Shuba shuba

    • @Antrodax
      @Antrodax Рік тому +6

      As far as I can tell, controllers were meant to be sentient and reasonable monsters, which could be dealt without violence. There is some of this idea in games, too. In Call of Pripyat there are controller who asks you to leave his cavern first, and attacks only if you move further. I played these games long ago so i cant tell any more examples but I'm sure there are some.

  • @cruzaider5339
    @cruzaider5339 2 роки тому +16

    2:01 I have to admit that was pretty funny

  • @apoptose1558
    @apoptose1558 2 роки тому +26

    I find 09:38 funny. It shows how Slavs love to complain.

  • @onursaltk3872
    @onursaltk3872 2 роки тому +21

    3:11 was not bad XD

  • @anomalousdugout9557
    @anomalousdugout9557 2 роки тому +73

    This video was more than needed. Thanks a lot for making it :)

  • @SylvesterLazarus
    @SylvesterLazarus 11 місяців тому +11

    I came up with one myself, a bit of a long one..
    Two Americans travel to the Zone to become stalkers. One of them ends up joining Duty, the other one joins Freedom, but one day they need to team up to complete a mission deep in the Zone and also need to bring a random East European stalker with them. On the way out they ran out of anti-radiation drugs, then their protective equipment goes out of service as well, so all they have to protect themselves from radiation is vodka. Eventually they realize which way to get out of the radiated field, but they only have so much vodka left that is only enough for two people, so one needs to be left behind.
    The Freedom stalker sais, "Man, we've been best buddies since we were kids, and I don't agree with Duty, but they do want to protect the world from the horrors of the zone, and your death would be a great loss for them," then he looks at the East European and sais, "And you.. we just met 2 days ago and we barely know each other."
    The Duty stalker speaks next, "Man, we've really been best buddies since we were kids, and I don't agree with Freedom, but they do want to find the value in the unknown wonders of the zone and share it with everyone, and your death would be a great loss for them," then he looks at the East European and sais, "And you.. we indeed just met 2 days ago and we barely know each other."
    Then the East European guy sais, "Gentelemen, I have a solution that would be great for all three of us. One of you is a proud Duty member, and it means that if you die, you'll be remembered as a brave protector of humanity. The other one of you is a proud Freedom member, and it means that if you die, you'll be remembered as a great anarchist hero. And me... I'm a proud East European, and it meast that I drink for two."
    To clearify: I grew up in Hungary, and appereantly with over 21% of our population being alcoholics they've just beaten Russia, but the rest of the ex-Soviet block are really not far behind. I think all the drunk jokes are well earned. I also originally wrote this joke in Hungarian with Biden, Zelenskyy, and Viktor Orbán of Hungary getting lost in the desert with not enough water and Orbán sais that he's a proud Hungarian who drinks for two.

    • @pandaking6247
      @pandaking6247 6 місяців тому

      😂

    • @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH
      @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH 6 місяців тому

      Alcohol is evil, but your jokes are awesome. Cheers! 😅

    • @SylvesterLazarus
      @SylvesterLazarus 6 місяців тому

      @@HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH I stopped drinking in 2018, I agree. :D I always say I already had 99 alcoholics in my family and I don't want to be the 100th.

    • @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH
      @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH 6 місяців тому

      @@SylvesterLazarus people use it as painkiller and its cheap one. however it modifies sense of reality, slowly and people dont notice, how they get addicted to it and how they change mentally for the worse. As of pain - if you woke up and don't feel any pain, you're probably dead haha, pain is a side effect of life. 😅 There is a nice film I watched recently about this, its "Rabies" 2023.

  • @BradPitBrasileiro
    @BradPitBrasileiro Рік тому +8

    monolith joke: oooh monolith monolith ooooh monolith?
    hahahahahahahaha monolith

    • @vova8306
      @vova8306 Рік тому +1

      ахах ну ты отжег)

    • @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH
      @HECKAKYH-ADEKBATEH 6 місяців тому

      интересно, роботы тоже шуток не понимают.

  • @ai1299
    @ai1299 2 роки тому +32

    8:19 wtf npc's moonwalking

  • @vittoriodio
    @vittoriodio 2 роки тому +215

    Translating russian jokes is pretty much impossible, first - dialect, yes english has some dialects but far from what russian has, dialect is important because everyone talks differently: bandits talk like gopniks/unsavory british elements in bad parts of *bad* towns and use different words for pretty much everything - if you've studied proper russian for 5 years you won't understand what they say at all. Loners talk like normal people that don't even use slurs that much, etc. Lots of details lost, not because the translator is bad, but because it's just too much work or simply impossible to adapt to english. On the other hand translating things like 'break a leg' to russian is not a problem, cause you can literally come up with new words and most people will understand you, not that there are no instances where you can't adapt things, it happens just much rarer. Don't recommend to learn the language, it's too much bloody work :)

    • @juvenilia_in_hell
      @juvenilia_in_hell 2 роки тому +11

      nothing good comes easy

    • @zhnigo
      @zhnigo 2 роки тому +15

      спасибо кринжанул

    • @xXRealXx
      @xXRealXx Рік тому +15

      Well, I speak Ukrainian and that applies to Ukrainian as well. Also, because I haven't used this language very much for a few years my skills and even understanding has dropped a lot.
      Also, this language is similiar enough to Russian that I understand some things but not everything. Bandits are the hardest to understand

    • @threemountainsgaming7560
      @threemountainsgaming7560 Рік тому +24

      "gopnik" talk is not a dialect, it's easily understandable to any native russian
      edit: it's more like a slang

    • @user-jc1hv8yq9h
      @user-jc1hv8yq9h Рік тому +10

      сейчас бы сленг называть диалектом

  • @SysOpTeto
    @SysOpTeto 8 місяців тому +8

    The invisible anomaly under the tree joke changes location and characters, depending where you are located in the game. The same story is repeated by different stalkers, with the details changed, like it is a well known local joke. for example at the Garbage they talk about sending a bandit under the tree. one my favourites is this one:
    (edit: the joke at 8:20 is also told in this way)
    A military officer interrogating a stalker:
    -Do you admit that while been drunk you tried to sneak out of the zone, in the area of the military checkpoint 12, carrying unregistered firearm and items forbidden for export out of the zone? Stalker is getting tired, he’s been interrogated like this for 3 hours so…
    -Yes I admit it. I was DRUNK. If I was sober I’d never try to pass so close to you bastards.

  • @boardante8454
    @boardante8454 2 роки тому +22

    Sad to see such happy men get mowed down. Or maybe even brutally murdered by mutants. The bandits laughing actually made me feel like they are happy. Theyre just doing stuff to make money for themselves or family. The zone is one heck of a place

  • @drunkheadcrab
    @drunkheadcrab 2 роки тому +18

    Loners unironically have some good jokes.

  • @paztwel
    @paztwel 9 місяців тому +4

    7:36 Great dialogue. Some of them are tired of these jokes 😂🤣

  • @Broken_Savior
    @Broken_Savior 2 роки тому +11

    The biggest punchline is Freedom, which you already posted.
    But I'm grateful for this, too.

    • @SMT-ks8yp
      @SMT-ks8yp Рік тому

      Nah, Freedom isn't just a punchline, they are a full joke.

  • @beanbob5535
    @beanbob5535 2 роки тому +22

    Шутки про кровососов наверное только в зове припяти... ну будем ждать второй части значит

  • @LOKIIcopy
    @LOKIIcopy 2 роки тому +12

    Jokes that are kinda different on original:
    Loners:
    Jeep and controllers - there was not a "mess on the back seat", joke was about that controllers write (scratch) bad words on a jeep itself.
    Two Stalkers by the lake - there was no tail that shedding, there were scales (fish or lizard skin) that itches instead
    Young and veteran Stalkers - actually, everything is same except those 2 were from a "Dolg"
    Military:
    Scary Creature - instead of "Do you feel better" there was something like "And what's the point?"
    Vasya that wanted to be a pilot - actually, really accurate, but in original he didn't LEARNED how to fly, he... Actually flied lol
    ~
    Other joker were translated without changing anything

  • @Monolitvennik
    @Monolitvennik 2 роки тому +53

    А где знаменитое
    -ВНИМАНИЕ А-НЕ-К-ДО-Т
    -...
    -блин, так не смешно же

    • @slendycandy8728
      @slendycandy8728 2 роки тому +5

      аахпхаахах

    • @MonoChorMe
      @MonoChorMe Рік тому +1

      "...А где говорит "Ха-Ха"...?" 😅

  • @evilmouse911
    @evilmouse911 2 роки тому +7

    i love how the military guy laughs, it’s so genuine

  • @GabeSlayer
    @GabeSlayer Рік тому +3

    0:29
    This one actually made me laugh lmao

  • @mihaisirbu1
    @mihaisirbu1 2 роки тому +6

    Wow I started watching this channel 3 days ago and I thought: "man who knows how much time will pass until I finally know what are they saying in the jokes". Looks like only 3 days! Keep up the good work!

  • @mauzer3353
    @mauzer3353 2 роки тому +11

    8:50 got me

  • @adamcichon6957
    @adamcichon6957 2 роки тому +10

    It's a pity there isn't neutral or even friendly encounters with some mutants. For example friendly, speaking izlom names "uncle" in the garbage. Player could've donate to him some food, smokes, vodka. In return it could said to a player a joke, warn of the danger in a specific area, wish a good hunting.
    Also one in four or five encounters with mutants could've be passive agressive, when Chimera with full stomach would just scared you off. That would be something.

  • @hunter_0221
    @hunter_0221 2 роки тому +15

    This video is a godsend. With all the jokes about Controllers communicating with STALKERs just like that, it does make you wonder whether they were supposed to be something more than just aggressive, brainless monsters. By lore, they should have at least a human-like intellect and the ability to speak, as evidenced by the Zaton controller who even warns you to not trespass into his cave. With such an intellect comes the choice of giving in to base instincts after becoming twisted like that (remember, Controllers are former criminals - humans - that were experimented on in one of the X-Labs, likely the Brain Lab X-16) or to actively combat this through discipline. I wouldn't complain if there would be an actual Controller NPC in STALKER 2, maybe some kind of hermit. Same goes for Burers as well, as they were created by a similar procedure.

    • @voidseeker4394
      @voidseeker4394 9 місяців тому

      I don't know why people think Controllers are brainless. They are just portrayed as totally alien, totally unfathomable, with morality that has nothing in common with mere humans. But brainless? Absolutely not.

  • @anegativecoconut4940
    @anegativecoconut4940 2 роки тому +16

    I can't wait for Monolith campfire jokes…

    • @user-cs9yd5le5x
      @user-cs9yd5le5x 2 роки тому +2

      Trust nobody but Monolith and thy brothers...

    • @user-cs9yd5le5x
      @user-cs9yd5le5x 2 роки тому +6

      They had all lines of loners, including jokes, until CoP in CoP they got unique voice lines so obviously they joke no more, only beg for Monolith to return to them.

  • @DivineBanana
    @DivineBanana Рік тому +2

    Thank you for keeping the music/ambient sounds. This game is all about the atmosphere and these lines wouldn't be the same without it.

  • @Kanister0
    @Kanister0 Рік тому +2

    2:01 The big Lebowski refrence

  • @evilcrucian8989
    @evilcrucian8989 2 роки тому +9

    Waiting for the part 2, the one with two newbies and a bloodsucker was my favourite

  • @titord6031
    @titord6031 2 роки тому +7

    Keep in mind those are 2007-2009 jokes for game

    • @ryszakowy
      @ryszakowy 2 роки тому

      game from 2007
      taking place in 2006
      created by people imagining how would life in such version fo the zone would be
      keep in mind that bobody gives a fuck about politics in games

  • @Doctorgeo7
    @Doctorgeo7 3 місяці тому

    The chill and generally relaxed atmosphere at camps was part of what made STALKER so good. Yes, the Zone is a place filled with killers, deadly mutants, reality breaking anomalies, and more. But every human needs a time and place to relax and unwind. It kept the whole place feel more grounded amidst all the chaos and gloom.

  • @saxophone5131
    @saxophone5131 10 місяців тому +5

    These jokes and stuff bring so much more life and intriugue to the zone, id never thought about controllers not trying to kill someone, and hearing how people just talk like buddies makes the Zone feel lived in, talks of cars and pubs feel so out of place but i guess in the games we only ever see a portion of the zone

  • @nisoyl
    @nisoyl 2 роки тому +5

    2:01 the best joke 😂😂😂

  • @devazion
    @devazion Рік тому +4

    2:25 made me laugh

  • @chrisca
    @chrisca 2 роки тому +13

    Some of those are quite good, like the one with the rookie and the veteran. The common saying is that rooks don't listen to vets and get killed; so the punchline is the complete reverse.
    But by far, the best is the "murky water" one xd

  • @logi3622
    @logi3622 5 місяців тому +1

    The one where the Stalker calls the controller "Doctor" really got me.

  • @rohansarkate2928
    @rohansarkate2928 2 роки тому +8

    I didn't know Wolf was such a good comedian.

  • @Zoraxon
    @Zoraxon 8 місяців тому +1

    Her: I bet he's out cheating on me!
    Me and the boys:

  • @yourdaddy5435
    @yourdaddy5435 2 роки тому +1

    Great stuff! Subscribed!

  • @jebediah4780
    @jebediah4780 2 роки тому +4

    With all the jokes referencing cars, it's highly likely that these were all added in during the phase of development where they were still trying to put cars in the game.

  • @deathincluded3706
    @deathincluded3706 7 місяців тому

    For a whole decade i sat around fires, listen to those jokes and never understood a thing...
    Thank you!!! i learned more russian from this video then 10 hours on Duolingo
    Also the one about a stalker shouting and a monster asking him if he feels better cause the monster heard his calls was a really good one

  • @TheRealSidorovich
    @TheRealSidorovich 2 роки тому +3

    YEEEES, FINALLY
    I LOVE YOU SO MUCH

  • @meetmeatball
    @meetmeatball 2 роки тому +6

    I Love your content . I hope all the best for you ^_^

  • @HonestObserver
    @HonestObserver 20 днів тому

    Hey, the last joke was pretty good, it wrapped up the video nicely.

  • @yoboikamil525
    @yoboikamil525 2 роки тому +3

    That joke bout the Mercenaries and Loner got such a snort out of me that I looked like I sneezed, snot all over my face.

  • @BENKYism
    @BENKYism 6 місяців тому +1

    2:02 "Where's the artifacts, Lebowski?"

  • @then00brathalos
    @then00brathalos Рік тому +2

    The mutant shitting in the back seat of a car joke is so widespread that I don't think it's a joke but rather something that actually happened

  • @Thes4LT
    @Thes4LT 2 роки тому +4

    The bandit jokes are cash. Great stuff.

  • @weapon131
    @weapon131 2 роки тому +4

    The joke about the Black Stalker sounds more like a story about a Zombie than "just" a joke.

    • @TheRifild
      @TheRifild 2 роки тому +4

      I'm not sure where he appeared first in the books or in the game (in this joke) but here's his folklore bio(google translate): Dima Shukhov, nicknamed Red, was one of the first stalkers. He was a desperate, courageous and lucky man. Red gathered around him a team of stalkers like him. Together they (albeit with heavy losses) reached the Chernobyl nuclear power plant. This is where the conflict between Shukhov and other members of the team occurred. In a rage, Red's former friends and partners "bricked" him at the base of the Sarcophagus. He died... but rose again. Resurrected already as the "Black Stalker" - the spirit of the Zone. He became a demon for some, an angel for others. He can severely punish anyone for violating the unwritten laws of the Zone, or he can save them by showing the lost an invisible trap or a safe route. They say that he even took some of them out for some of his own considerations on especially rare and valuable artifacts. For stalkers, he is a mystical, but at the same time a real personification of the Zone. But it is worth remembering that this is only a legend. The legend that in the dungeons of the Chernobyl nuclear power plant quietly tells the stalker where to go

    • @weapon131
      @weapon131 2 роки тому

      @@TheRifild Interesting, I haven't been aware of that bit of lore. Thanks

  • @user-nq6yx2ib8d
    @user-nq6yx2ib8d Рік тому +2

    Сидит около избушки старый кровосос. Тут из избушки выбегает маленький детёныш-кровососик и всё клянчит: "дед, а покажи сталкеров! Ну покажи сталкеров!" Старый кровосос поднялся, пошёл в дом. Выходит с двумя черепами, и начинает сценку разыгрывать, как в кукольном театре: "Степаныч, а тут точно нет кровососов?", "Петруха, ну какие здесь нахрен кровососы!.."

  • @Miryyaa
    @Miryyaa Рік тому +5

    I just realised that the Russian-dubbed version of the Metro Series rehired some of the S.T.A.L.K.E.R.'s voice actors. I always play Metro series in Russian dub. I'm pretty surprised that I didn't realise that Khan and some of the Loners were voiced by Oleg Stalchuk.

  • @STALKER-tv7hd
    @STALKER-tv7hd 2 роки тому +3

    good work brother!

  • @Lysimachus
    @Lysimachus 2 роки тому +1

    nice depth having jokes that fall flat and result in a sharp rebuke from the others

  • @Naminator5
    @Naminator5 8 місяців тому

    There's far more jokes about Controllers than the encounters of them in Shadow of Chernobyl.

  • @brojack3571
    @brojack3571 4 місяці тому +1

    This bandit is choosing the wrong place as their hidden out😂

  • @murisbukvic2496
    @murisbukvic2496 Рік тому +2

    Here is the one i remembered being translated:
    A college student is taking a final exam, but he looks visibly tired, always yawning, bags beneath the eyes etc.
    The professor asked him why he looks like that.
    The student says: "i keep having this nightmare, i'm in a radioactive area, weird anomalies everywhere and monsters are tearing me to shreds."
    The professor thinks about it, and says: "it looks like if you get a diploma, you'll get enough knowledge to be a stalker. So i can do this to help you. I will fail you, and you get drafted into the army. There you won't have to worry about radiation or monsters."

  • @Icanmotived
    @Icanmotived 2 роки тому +7

    Появился значит в зоне чёрный сталкер...

  • @Fernandoenf2
    @Fernandoenf2 2 роки тому

    Fantastic video thank you so much

  • @ushankaman6143
    @ushankaman6143 Рік тому +5

    knowing some russian myself, i am able to enjoy the full experience of sitting by a campfire with other stalkers and hear them banter and joke. makes me feel like i belong
    btw, some of the words are not correctly translated. although translating russian to english can sometimes prove to be quite strange. its a matter of "do i translate the words directly or translate it by its context and meaning?"

  • @greg3916
    @greg3916 2 роки тому +8

    Woah lucky me! 3 minutes ago!!

  • @geberlan
    @geberlan 2 роки тому +2

    "Stalker and the well" is a good one! :D

  • @genericprotagonist2842
    @genericprotagonist2842 Рік тому +10

    "If I survive I'll have to ask my friend about what is this new mystery, scary thing; 'pub and girls'."
    This same stupid joke makes me absolutely lose it every time I hear it, it's not funny and it's told poorly but I just wheeze every single time.

  • @c.c.c.p6102
    @c.c.c.p6102 Рік тому +8

    I love these Stalker dialogs they are awesome for an AI, sometimes it reminds me of random conversations I have with my friends. Note it is clear that those on duty are very military with their jokes like the one about the two stalkers with the goldfish sounds like more of a fighting experience to me.

  • @gdttdeggegdh5471
    @gdttdeggegdh5471 2 роки тому +26

    Would be cool to actually have all the jokes, but that would require so much effort to translate them, there's like an hour of those across the series. Although there are duplicates told by different voice actors. Still, you non-russian/ukrainian speakers are missing out for now.

  • @paranoidschizophrenic3815
    @paranoidschizophrenic3815 2 роки тому +2

    Cool that they made references to cut content

  • @TheArkTheArkTheArk
    @TheArkTheArkTheArk Рік тому +8

    I know there’s been lots of people who’ve said it already, but I really, genuinely appreciate you taking the time to translate so much of the dialogue in STALKER. I’ve been playing these games since ~2010 and as a english speaker who doesn’t know a single word of Ukrainian I’ve always, always wondered what they were saying. And now I know. It was dad jokes all along.

    • @user-yq1rc1ti2l
      @user-yq1rc1ti2l Рік тому +1

      All dialogues are in Russian. The game was created by Russian-speaking people. And the Ukrainian language was created by the Bolsheviks from rural dialects and dialects. Uneducated people live in the villages, so the native speakers of the Ukrainian language are not distinguished by intelligence. Therefore, the second part of the game "stalker" will disappoint. If he ever comes out.

    • @TheArkTheArkTheArk
      @TheArkTheArkTheArk Рік тому +1

      @@user-yq1rc1ti2l okay calm down nationalist.

    • @user-yq1rc1ti2l
      @user-yq1rc1ti2l Рік тому +1

      @@TheArkTheArkTheArk No need to be confused. Nationalists and fascists are just now in Ukraine. They were brought up by Western curators, who at one time raised the Nazis in Germany and Italy. It was the USSR and Russia that defeated fascism. And where did the Nazis from Germany go? They fled to the USA!

    • @user-yq1rc1ti2l
      @user-yq1rc1ti2l Рік тому

      @@TheArkTheArkTheArk The paradox is that the communists created Ukraine from the Russian people and the Russian territories "Little Russia" and "Novorossia" after the revolution of 1917, and today in Ukraine they are getting rid of everything that is connected with this inconvenient past for them. It's like in some creepy movie where people are brainwashed in a relatively short time. But this is reality.

    • @user-yq1rc1ti2l
      @user-yq1rc1ti2l Рік тому +1

      @@TheArkTheArkTheArk And also copy it to the UA-cam line. They won't tell you about it on your news, but it's been happening for EIGHT YEARS. -
      "Артём Гришанов - Игрушки / Toys for Poroshenko / War in Ukraine (English subtitles)"