Never Convince Him To Be With You! Do This Instead & Make Love Inevitable!
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- Опубліковано 21 кві 2020
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ladies if you’re confused... ever. Ditch him. Like stop wasting your time! Someone better will come along!
Nah, they really won't, unless he's a simp, which girls won't ever truly love or respect. Any man with options or high value just moves on since he has options, we don't give mixed signals or confuse women. This isn't highschool
Yea but it's hard..I thought I was n luv
The one who left me confused and ghosted and reappear to me I ignore him now he just stalking me . Why not I am gorgeous he tought I'm so desperate to have him & csnt move on.
So True!
Remember OUR own Value!
@@spartangreg1 in other words, you're all jerks.
You are totally right Brian. The more you try to push a man to be with you the further back he will go and pull away. It took me a really long time to realize this. So now I just back off and let them come to me. No pressure, no discussions, nothing. Try to just be happy each time they see u and enjoy ur time being with them that's what they really want and really want to see in you. Men just basically want happiness. Not someone bringing them down all the time. Maintain your own individuality. Be interesting and fun to be with. Do what you enjoy. Love yourself first and foremost. If it is meant to be it will be.
Dittooo
Meant to be lol some girls chase guys and they get married lol
No discussions... Only happiness?? How long can you keep that up? 😅
💯
Very deep words..
Sorry for my bad English.
But all you said is true.
When we love someone. Just let them go and set them free😊
“If you are not the kind of wine they want, you handover the menu to them and leave the table “ 👏👏. You are every woman’s true friend who is feeling weak because of her emotions. Thanks for coming here 💐
This may be the best line I've ever heard.
thank u
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thank
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uthank thank goodness 😅
uusapan
uusapan has
ulit has always happened in japan 🇯🇵 this week i has a day of spring to day to come out in the day haha 😆 morning was that day to come and watch me sis in my love 😍 i i morning morning love.
super
Im totally stealing and reposting this. Realist shit I ever heard🙄
Couldn't have said it better 👏
"If someone doesn't like the type of wine you are, hand them the menu and leave the table".. This is the best advice I have heard. Thank you!
👏👏👏
I'd rather be single forever than end up with the mismatch person.💟
Logicgal 👌🏻
Sometimes one doesn't see it until years in, though, Logicgal.
Thank you, Brian. Always looking forward to watching your videos.
”The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the intention of loving her.” Bob Marley
Diana Of Markham nice quote
That just happened to me recently! Well said!😊
@@lt3308 Sorry to hear that. :(
Bob Marley spoke the truth ....as he always did
God rest his soul.
That is exactly the quote the man I fell for said to me 😢
We will never be the “good enough” for the WRONG person.
The person that’s meant for you will not ask you to change because you are enough just as you are.
👏👏👏👍👍❤😘
Brian is so right, I spent too long trying to get the white wine drinkers to value me but now I have found my red wine connoisseur 💕
bullcrane Kai I love this,the comparison of white wine drinker to a red wine connoisseur.Sometimes we wanted badly to be in a relationship that sometimes we forget our value and love the wrong person.
I loved when he talked about this also! Such a great analogy and so true. My connoisseur is out there looking for me also❤️🙌
@@nardabramer he is out there for you, don't let the low class white wine drinkers distract you haha leave your heart free for him 💕
My previous relationship left me feeling worthless - he couldn't think of one thing he liked about me, laughed at the thought of me being considered pretty and ghosted me out of the blue. It affected my self esteem. After him I met a guy who looks at me like I'm the most wonderful girl he's ever seen, tells me I'm amazing and beautiful, treats me like I'm a fine wine and has asked me to marry him :) It just takes the right person to appreciate you, like Brian says though the challenge is finding him.
@@JustMe-xz4xg definitely, we can't allow someone else to allow us to devalue ourselves 💕
My red wine connoisseur left me...cause he needed to move in another country but seems like he’s staying... :) and I like him still, and he was having a crush on me for a year and all his friends knew that...and all that happened between us happened few moths while he waited for papers...so he said i Don’t want to hurt you it will hard for both of us if I go and you stay if it happens I’m going... and he really showed he’s in to me...but now it’s all in the God’s hands... destiny...
Here's the problem- he typically does not have the courage to actually tell her. Leading to confusion and indifference. He enjoys the attention to his ego. Guys- be honest with her.
Lisa Weglinski yes. I agree. I’m not wasting anymore time
YES!! I WISH!
“The goal in our love life is to find our connoisseur” ...very well said.
Say goodbye to someone who doesn't see your light...
This video was so valuable for me. The penny finally dropped, I’ve been trying to convince a guy that I’m worthy because he does really like a lot about me. But he told me he isn’t looking for a relationship- not in a convo about us just in general. I feel like if he really wanted me like that he wouldn’t have said that. It’s his actions that confuse me because he will do really thoughtful wonderful things for me and with me. But I think he just likes the girlfriend vibes and not the actual girlfriend commitment right now. Which means ultimately he isn’t the guy for me. Sucks so bad because is everything I want in a partner, like the only person I’ve met who ticks all of my boxes. I guess all but one, that he likes me enough to be with me. Harsh truth and a hard pill to swallow. I’m trying not to let it make me feel unworthy or destroy my self esteem but it’s proving very difficult. I know I need to invest all my energy into my personal growth and development. But this crush has felt so yummy and exciting for months and not having that now feels empty and makes life seem boring. But I know this is a side effect of my limerance for him. I pray it leaves me because I don’t want to feel this way anymore. If only he wasn’t the hottest man I’ve ever seen and kind and smart to boot. Oh well. Hopefully I’ll meet someone else who is hot and kind. I hope so because no one else seems worth it now. I’m so messed up lol but this video was very helpful for me to realise I have to let go and stop deluding myself. It’s bad for my health.
Going through this right now, it's almost like your describing my fiancé. Im on my way to find my self worth again, you can do this❤️
same girl same, it sucks and how. More power to you to move on
If you force a relationship, it may end eventually.
Really needed to hear this information. Im not red or white wine. Im bourbon and I've been looking in vineyards for way too long.
Mmmm Bourbon
😂😂😂😂 I feel you...kmsl we strong don't sip us like wine be a grown man and drink us...
Yesss! 👍🖤❣🤍
I knew he did not love me but sleeping around and using me financially then I changed the game. I played the fool, make him get addicted to me and all the benefits then dump him like a thrash when he needed me most, now he is going mad, I made myself his Karma.
Need to learn from u 😂😂
It may have been better not to let resentments build until you want to dump him like trash for revenge, Abby Oye.
@Lauren Tither no she didn't. She just cut him lose and had fun doing it. He deserved it to be cut lose.
Kool give him a taste of his own medicine.
Love it!!
"The goal in our love life is to find our connoisseurs" -- this is pretty much the most amazing thing I've ever heard. Thank you.
Men just fall out of like with us like that “snaps fingers” and suddenly after all the attention we are left going - wait where do you go?? Don’t come at us unless you are sincere please men! We are tired of being jerked around
They're usually the ones that have wives, girlfriends, and other options in their lives, that they conceal for a moment, then comes the decline😔
I don’t know what makes men think it’s ok to mess with a woman’s feelings the way they do. I’ll never go out with a man I’m not physically or emotionally attracted to, but a man will pretend to be in love with you for sex. Chase you until he gets what he wants then disappear, leaving you hurt, broken, and confused. They’re so selfish. Then they move on to the next victim. It’s not ok.
Lynn Yes There also needs to be videos on how to teach men how to behave. How to treat is women better!
High value women wouldn't convince the man to be with her. Remember that if they pull away, then it's not great love. 😉 Indeed, the right one stays. Anyhow, Let's be thankful that we are protected and being redirected to the best one. Stay valuable princess, you are a gem, a high price. 💙
As a wine sales person who happens to also be a single woman.. bravo man! This is the niche but relatable love advice I need in my life. Thank you!
Yep...my bf and I clicked on the first meet, great date, and an awesome kiss at the end. It's been super easy for 9 months..
I am divorced after 16 yrs married, was single for over 5 before he came into my life 😊 ....I also dated some wrong men for me and had to set them free, it wasn't easy but all worth it
Don't ever try to convince anyone of your value. As long as you know your value, you are not obliged to make anyone else see it. You just go with those who do. Hold your head up! It's not easy but you need to, don't waste time settling!
I'm to the point where I am just tired and yes I take accountability for dating the wrong men. I'm tired of being the one that loves more, care more, reach out more, initiate more. It has took a toll on me physically. Now it's like I get physically sick to my stomach when a guy approach me. I just don't want to be bothered anymore. My mind and body has shut down.
I’m sorry ☹️ I know exactly what you mean though. I feel like that too sometimes. Like I have nothing left in me to give and the thought of another man trying to approach me makes me feel physically sick 🤢
You articulated my exact state of mind right now.
cupcake sparkle- i’ve been where you are at. I completely understand where you are coming from. Like you are completely drained emotionally and physically and feel like if you give anymore....you are going to be eaten alive. Here’s my advice.....take a few (not just one) steps back.....BIG LONG deep breathe....give yourself some time away from “hanging out with anyone” (hint, hint....think you get it), whether that be a few days, weeks, or months (just make sure it’s not permanent cause then it will get to the point that it affects you negatively yet again)....however long you need cause it’s different for everyone....then lastly (but should be first) give it to God, the entire situation...release to God. Those steps worked for me.....hope it works for you too!! Best of luck!!
Relatable.
@@donnamartinez6552 thank you for the advice. I'm in a self healing and self love journey and I'm taking better care of my mind, body and soul. I'm nourishing my inner self and it has been going great. I have disconnected from everyone and it feels so good and when the time becomes open again I will only let nourishing people in my life❤️
"If someone doesn't like the type of wine you are, you hand them the menu and you leave the table." WORD!
Your advice has me rethinking my entire life !!! This is pure common sense, so common it’s hiding in plain view😂 You are also very knowledgable in emotional intelligence. You deliver this in a very funny and witty way. I find myself laughing at your humour and myself for not seeing obvious things in past relationships! 😂😂😂 In one video I wasn’t sure if I wanted to slap my ex or myself! 🤣🤣😂
Slap my ex or myself!
Love it!
🤣🤣🤣💚💚💚
😂😂❤
I agree with you. This is something both males and females need to learn. Last year I went on so many dates with men that weren't compatible with me, yet I know these same men would be perfect for other women.
I am highly analytical and value open communication. A man that doesn't like to be challenged or doesn't have the communication skills on my level, will always view me as negative. It can be hard if you have a physical or emotional attraction, but the best thing you can do is friend zone him OR erase him from your life all together. Awesome video.💋
Yep, i dealt with a man that does not want to be challenged and who did not value open communication and he thought that I was complaining all the time or being negative as well.
.....iDeal with the same. Or because i speak up on what i have analyzed iGet the crazy 👀 eyes like iAm Bat Sht Crazy...i Instantly have become the "crazy female" foe having value and a voice to speak up.
The struggle is real.
Yeah he‘s absolutely right, we should not waste time with people who are not right for us. But the problem is when you fell in love with someone and you know it’s not the right person, but you still love him, it hurts so so much. It’s the same with some „friends“ of mine, I know they‘re not good for me, but I‘ve known them for years and breaking up the contact after all this years is not easy. I really want to look forward and want to think I will find better people, who really appreciate me, but I just can‘t let go. Every day I see the picture of the one man I love in my mind and my dreams and he left me years ago. It never goes away, I just want that this ends... I even visited a doctor who said I have a manic depression and that‘s why it never goes away :(
I wish I’d seen this over five years ago, it would have saved me a lot of heartache. Although over time he did say he loved me occasionally, he always made me think I wasn’t the right bottle of wine he was looking for, otherwise he would have bought the wine instead of leaving his options open.
This advice is actually good even for men. Don't waste time and energy on the wrong people, if you're trying too hard, you'll know.
Im so fed up of dating, each time I like a guy he runs away or friend zone me. Yes my self esteem is totally drawn in the gutter... I think there is no one for me an it saddens me a lot. Definitely there's something wrong with me
I love this guy! He's so humble, has a great sense of humor and explains everything so well, I feel much better after watching his videos!
Thank you, Brian ❤
Love the wine analogy, especially because I love white wine. Thanks for reminding us that there’s a connoisseur out there who will appreciate exactly the kind of wine we are 😊
Why are there so many dating coaches teaching women how to behave towards men?? Why aren’t there any teaching men how to win and deserve a woman?? Most men are utterly clueless!
Men don’t go looking for this info like we do or care as much about their part in the relationship sadly...
Coz men don't bother... They just want their needs met and as somebody said in one of the posts here that they need cheerleaders
I love your comment about the more incompatible we are with a certain someone the more we want to make them like us. This has got to be a mind game and a complete waste of time.
His advice always resonates well with me, it's genuine and caring. His tone is calming like that of a close dear friend. Thank you so much for sharing your advice with us. 🙂👍
I am going thru a very bad relationship, still in it actually, felt totally neglected, cries for weeks, after hearing all what brian said, i felt better, empower again, and before i know it, i didnt cry at all this two days, for the first time, i learn to know my value, you dont know how much you help me, thank you so much!!, Gonna search his books!
@@donalddaniel5227 thanks❤️
Amazing thank you.
It all comes down to the point that we have to tell ourselves that we are enough as we are right now. Period.
Sometime's though everything flows easy initially but after a while even after a long time things change.
Wow, you are my all time favorite relationship adviser! You’re so great at explaining things to us. I will make better relationships choices b/c of you. Thank you!! 🙏🏼
Good for you! You should be quite young!?😉
Where has this man been all of my life! Every woman seriously needs to listen to this man every time they log into a dating site. Brian is a breath of fresh air!
This video perfectly describes my love life. I even started to cry. Thank you ❤
Love the truth covered in humor! Simple, to the point, yet adoreable
I love this man's videos. They always make sense and his mode of delivery is second to none.
This is how my parents are and they’ve been married 40+ years. Thanks!
This is your first video that I must comment because it is your most WISE and TRUE video.
Loved this video!The perspective is what we should be doing instead of feeling bad about ourselves
This is the best video for those who feel abandoned from relationships down the hill.... thank you so much i downloaded this and play it over and over again
Brian, I really like your videos, but this one was particularly amazing. That's exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you some much. You gave me peace of mind and lightened up my heart
This is so chock full of wisdom. Thank you, Brian.
Love how you are addressing relationship. Always a pleasure watching your video.
When i started 2 watch Brian is video's i changed so much for the good! Not only in a relation with man but also for the good 2 other people because i feel so much more connected 2 myself now a days♥️💯
Love the wine analogy. Crystal clear. Thank you!!!
The goal is to find our connoisseur... I love this 💗
I love Brian's sense of humour 😂
Thank you so much Brian! I love your wine analogy! So easy to understand. I like the idea of not wasting time trying to make everyone like us. Dating is a numbers game, I think once we see the person once or a couple times we'll know if we want to spend more time. We all must use our heads and multiple factors to arrive at this, so I'm in! Thank you for your time and videos:))
5:13-ish... "yea cool but that's bs" 😂 was delivered so chill I got to cracking up.
I feel like he just completely described me there. Feeling that Im not good enough, because guys just curve and ghost me all the time. I even started asking my friends if they think something is wrong with me. I really needed to see this video, coz even I, dont see my worth anymore. Thank you.
Love this guy! He’s insightful and witty!
Your advice is very spot on, it really helped me cut ties (hope this time is real) with my ex who has been on and off stringing me along for nearly 2 years..! Little had I known that he’s been devaluing me for the actions that I took. I believed his words rather than actions. My fault.
Looking forward to your new (audio) books!
I needed this today! My heart needed this message! Bless You
Thank you for the video !! I needed to hear this.
He felt that and said to me on the first date and told me we have something special but je never make it hard for me to feel how much beautiful love is . Now he asked me last week if i am ready for Us To be a couple- thank you for making it how you word it straight to the point❤
Oh thank you! Why didn't someone tell me years ago! I'm catching up tho.... 🙂🌈
I drank the wrong wine for 22 years. I am glad I managed to get out of the wine cellar. Now I am going abstinent. It feels good.
But sometimes you fall in love with someone you know isn’t meant for you. But you love them anyway despite all this. How do you get over that feeling? When you know you cannot go on without them but know personalities clashes all the time
In the same boat. I've tried throwing myself into work, my practices and routines before him. I've decided that either I'm going to 1) go on a date with someone I would never otherwise consider 2) do something absolutely terrifying think skydiving or for me, public speaking, to overcome the angst. Good luck sweetie!!
All of the comments.. I've found truth in your comment, 200% true❤️
THIS. I'm so stuck.
Unfortunately we can (& do) fall in love with people we cannot be with. I've had to leave 2 men while I was deeply in love with them, 20 years apart. Took years and therapy but I broke away.
I know this one i am in a relationship with someone who i feel was never really ment for me I love him but I feel I am forever trying to convince him that I am worthy sad but true
Love this, just what I needed to hear 💕
Pure gold, just what I was looking for, thank you, I know it is not easy letting someone you love go, but you have to respect yourself and let others to respect you as well.
He’s like mirror , we are so compatible it’s stupid , we roll of the banter together, he says that I’m sick 😂. We both pick our nails , we both make random noises . We both do so many other things that are the same , we feel so at ease with each other . We both like the same movies music spiritual stuff food crystals the list is endless …
Wow, this video was timely as I’ve been struggling with this off and on but the example you have made it crystal clear for me.
Such a simple concept and yet I couldn't conceptionalize it until you put it in perspective. I wish more men would watch these videos.
Well said.. all you need is one to see your worth! Also just move on if they don't....
Thanks
Perfect analogy, thank you!
Only one connoisseur is needed 💕💕💕💕
You sense of humour is so on point! ❤️
Just what i needed to hear ❤️ Thank you 😊
"If someone doesn't like the type of wine you are, you hand them the menu and you leave the table" Wow. So glad I found this channel. Thanks Brian!
Thank you Brian! You are totally right :) I feel that situation now. I was very sad at the beginning but then I realize I have to move on.
Thank you. Straight to the point. I needed to be reminded of this.
Exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks for making this video ☺️❤.
I love this!! Thank you, Brian!
This makes so much sense! The right men will be attracted to the real me and all I'll have to do is decide on the one for me. I've tried with the white wine drinkers and need to focus on the red wine drinkers.
Agreed. It's about compatibility and suitability.
This is so well-put, and for me very well-timed. Thanks for your wholesome and insightful work :)
Thank you so much, your teachings have really helped my relationship life.
Brian, I just wanted to say how awesome you are. You’ve helped me tremendously. Thank you!!
This is so good. Thanks for the content!
Thanks! I badly need this advice! It does hit me so hard! I love you!!!
Bernz Berden so true!!
Thank u Brian!!! something i really wanted to hear.
Thanks a lot sir
I indeed needed this.but the obstacle is where I can find the connoisseur and that right men for me.
Thank you, that was exactly what I needed
🙋♀️ been there done that!
Put a lot of effort into the wrong guy for me 😓
Basically just spinning my wheels with no traction. I stupidly Over invested in
him/us and got little back in return 😕
To be honest
I am feeling like am pushing him away by fighting for his attention
I really love him so much but I want him to fight for me too💔it hurts
Thank you for this Brian. I love this. ❤️
Brilliant analogy, in its simplicity.
I just believe sometimes its bad timing. Or the person makes us realize what we deserve or don't deserve.
Thank you Brian! I really needed this!
Thank you Brian!! You're awesome!
I found my connoisseur for advice and videos and just straight up vibing :) I am so happy I found your channel. Great vibes
Check out shera seven you'd love her
I'm afraid lm trapped in a Cellar with the wrong Wine!
Bonnie Bester lol sorry about that
Same here.
Bonnie me too 😢 good luck x
Me
Gosh... you are one lovely man. Full of real empathy and a lovely way of putting out your message. I love your fairy stories relating to real life! Very artistic of you. And entertaining. Thank you for sharing your gentleman-like nature and understanding of relational dynamics. It is very encouraging.
I love the wine analogy. Perfect
Super analogy. Your delivery is warm, sincere, engaging. Obviously you have insights that come from a wise source or just experience. Either way, they are most helpful and very much appreciated. Maneuvering through the senior dating scene is most challenging after many years of life, kids and hurts. Love and the desire for it seems to cross all age limits and demographics. I shall continue to listen to your advice as I work through my own dating adventure which is loaded with many unusual but exciting circumstances. Cheers!
Yes, he just lovely. He tells us how it is. Kindly.
Well said! I’ve been on my dating adventure for 7 years now, after losing my husband of 30 years. I never realized how hard it is to meet someone you’re attracted to and compatible with. I’ve dated quite a lot and had some memorable adventures. I’ve been infatuated a couple of times, but always recognized it for what it was. And now, at 64, I’ve met a man I feel excited about. We had 5 dates before the lockdown and we’re still in touch. He’s not as communicative as I’d like, but I’m cutting him some slack because these are strange times and besides, most women have a greater need for contact. As long as he makes the effort to keep in touch, I will keep him around till this is over and we can date again. Years ago, I might have let him go because he wasn’t meeting my needs, but now that I’ve been out there and seen how difficult it is to find a man who even comes close to doing that, I will not be so rash. Let’s face it, no man will ever fulfill our every need or desire, so if you find a good one who comes close, don’t dismiss him over small stuff.
That is really smart way of putting it!