Advice for Beginner Metalheads!

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  • Опубліковано 2 гру 2024

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  • @oddcop945
    @oddcop945 5 років тому +3932

    1. Listen to metal
    2. Repeat
    Its that easy :)

    • @Padre619
      @Padre619 5 років тому +155

      Nah man, you don't just listen to metal, you have to be metal, you need to become one with the subculture

    • @BegetterVIIEVEN
      @BegetterVIIEVEN 5 років тому +107

      You gotta know some albums, know band members, and actually know the band on the damn shirt.

    • @snwia9i281
      @snwia9i281 5 років тому +176

      lemme fix that
      1. listen to metal
      2. know your shit
      3. repeat

    • @Padre619
      @Padre619 5 років тому +11

      @@BegetterVIIEVEN exactly, was too lazy to put that though

    • @christopherhuff8302
      @christopherhuff8302 5 років тому +2

      Yeah dude

  • @emonightmare842
    @emonightmare842 6 років тому +4126

    "Nobody wants to argue what genre Ghost is, not even Ghost."

    • @kurwaman6683
      @kurwaman6683 6 років тому +116

      (Polish) Ghost is a great death metal band! :]

    • @TheOneXash
      @TheOneXash 6 років тому +31

      @@kurwaman6683 AHAH who the fuck are you to say that? :D

    • @kurwaman6683
      @kurwaman6683 6 років тому +59

      @@TheOneXash a man from kurwa land

    • @TheOneXash
      @TheOneXash 6 років тому +11

      @@kurwaman6683 Okay, I'm fine with this then ^^ let's say Ghost is a great death metal band ^^

    • @qtpie1113
      @qtpie1113 5 років тому +49

      Ghost is a Rock band.

  • @Uatemysoul
    @Uatemysoul 5 років тому +2230

    How to be a metal head, the Short and sweet version. listen to heavy metal. Know more bands then metallica, slayer, black sabbath and motorhead.

  • @moistier3333
    @moistier3333 4 роки тому +1391

    Chris: do we really have faith in David mustardstane?
    Dave mustaine: *beats cancer*
    Chris: *visibly sweating bullets*

    • @moistier3333
      @moistier3333 4 роки тому +3

      @Punch Death he clearly should

    • @nightwingshadow9551
      @nightwingshadow9551 4 роки тому +12

      Hmm James hetfield sings with Lady gaga and gets his mic cut off while Dave gets a Grammy oh yea Metallica is so metal 🙄

    • @moistier3333
      @moistier3333 4 роки тому +25

      @@nightwingshadow9551 wot

    • @raskullsshako
      @raskullsshako 4 роки тому +2

      That profile pic 😹

    • @11037_kuwata
      @11037_kuwata 4 роки тому +1

      @Punch Death y e s

  • @thatloserderek536
    @thatloserderek536 5 років тому +456

    I don’t know how this man kept a straight face for most of this video

  • @giantpinkcat
    @giantpinkcat 4 роки тому +834

    "No one is gonna pressure your validity if you're wearing a death T-shirt."
    *cries in female*

    • @nottodaynint.nottoday2235
      @nottodaynint.nottoday2235 2 роки тому +81

      My literal teacher pestered me on it and left the iron maiden shirt guy alone despite him not listening

    • @Lauren-se5bu
      @Lauren-se5bu Рік тому +5

      I've never been called a poser and I'm a female

    • @do_yohomework
      @do_yohomework Рік тому

      @@Lauren-se5bu ur lucky to not meet any creeps or haven’t gone to death metal shows lol being a woman is enough to get called a poser. If u don’t know every death metal album ever released and every bands member history ur a poser. If u don’t let a crust musty metal bro mansplain the history of metal to u ur a poser

    • @a.clemons
      @a.clemons Рік тому

      @@Lauren-se5bu same

    • @tanneredge9774
      @tanneredge9774 Рік тому

      But do you know Morbid Saint?

  • @JWall_InKc
    @JWall_InKc 5 років тому +1084

    I cant quite shake the feeling that you are a walking dead fan.

    • @rickyp.martin3209
      @rickyp.martin3209 5 років тому +27

      I think you are onto something there bud.

    • @anonimationghoul8798
      @anonimationghoul8798 5 років тому +25

      I LOVE THE WALKING DEAD🔥🔥🔥😌.......AND METAL😌🤘🔥🔥🔥🔥

    • @occiferfigpucker4840
      @occiferfigpucker4840 5 років тому +24

      The Walking Dead is a metal as fuck show dude. Season 9 is literally The Wild West in the Apocalypse.

    • @bobfromwork
      @bobfromwork 5 років тому +17

      No the Walking dead is the soap opera of the zombie apocalypse genre, its fucking gay. sorry.

    • @bobfromwork
      @bobfromwork 5 років тому +1

      @@gorilla4887 You may be right, I never saw more than a few hours of it. It's just that the dumbed down characters and the nature of a tv shows progression doesn't fit the genre. All it needs to be a full blown soap is canned laughter and recap at the start of each episode- It might have that by now? Wouldn't surprise me.

  • @victorupreti6285
    @victorupreti6285 4 роки тому +1218

    The worst is when they call it “rock music” or “screamo”

    • @dinnerorz
      @dinnerorz 4 роки тому +31

      Victor Upreti when my friend calls it hard rock lol

    • @RoyDontHugMeImScared
      @RoyDontHugMeImScared 4 роки тому +2

      You call it what you want, I call it a yawn-fest

    • @PXNTI
      @PXNTI 4 роки тому +58

      But after all metal sub generes, part of rock..........?

    • @cathy8187
      @cathy8187 4 роки тому +53

      I was playing death metal for my friend and he called it alternative rock

    • @victorupreti6285
      @victorupreti6285 4 роки тому +2

      Ze rraapp boiii oh god 😂😂😂

  • @Lvng_Kvlt
    @Lvng_Kvlt 5 років тому +1361

    Number one :yell out FUCKINGGGG SLAYERRRRRRR at least once a day

    • @cadenworley5610
      @cadenworley5610 5 років тому +5

      Pk Uptaunt FUCKINGGGG SLAYERRRRRRR

    • @austin5575
      @austin5575 5 років тому +5

      @Pk Uptaunt once a day?? I yell FUCKING SLAYER atleast once an hour ATLEAST i usually do it more thohgh

    • @datwelder3365
      @datwelder3365 5 років тому

      Pk Uptaunt SSSSSSSLLLLLAAAAYYYYER

    • @austin5575
      @austin5575 5 років тому +1

      @@datwelder3365 fucking*

    • @dablindscooter1973
      @dablindscooter1973 5 років тому

      Cherry Hunting Kakyoin no exodus

  • @lowlyworm8510
    @lowlyworm8510 5 років тому +753

    “Ghost is just scooby doo chase music” was not the hot take i expected but its not inaccurate

  • @swag-machine
    @swag-machine 6 років тому +2557

    my parents accept me as bisexual but they don't accept me as a metalhead

    • @jhofffilms
      @jhofffilms  6 років тому +1089

      We accept you... As a bisexual.

    • @Dreki-eu3kk
      @Dreki-eu3kk 6 років тому +369

      Metalhead and pansexual living in a catholic house. I feel your pain.

    • @spectratio
      @spectratio 6 років тому +104

      my parents don't know i'm either
      except maybe the metal one

    • @theafflictionvhs17
      @theafflictionvhs17 6 років тому +29

      Swag Machine bisexuals are gay....
      LOL

    • @adamdavey6102
      @adamdavey6102 6 років тому +7

      Dreki 1205 ur bi

  • @chillfactory9000
    @chillfactory9000 4 роки тому +1369

    "The next tip is getting to know your alchohol."
    Me a minor: *_h m m_*

    • @xxrandom_userxx9994
      @xxrandom_userxx9994 4 роки тому +16

      Same

    • @МартинЖивков-с4й
      @МартинЖивков-с4й 4 роки тому +53

      Me a minor in Bulgaria, *confused noises*

    • @noname-mr4xu
      @noname-mr4xu 4 роки тому +42

      Same, a 12-year-old girl.

    • @kodokijo7341
      @kodokijo7341 4 роки тому +16

      @@xxrandom_userxx9994 u have the exact same profile pic with my sister, i thought she was getting into metal lol

    • @datura2719
      @datura2719 4 роки тому +48

      *Me a minor in Romania* Do you guys actually wait until you're 18?

  • @kennethgriggs8737
    @kennethgriggs8737 6 років тому +423

    “Worst case Ontario”
    (Few minutes ago) “some people say I have a Canadian accent, but I don’t know wut you’re talking a boot”

  • @ppaulisdeadd2710
    @ppaulisdeadd2710 6 років тому +571

    Dave Mustaine < Dave _Mustard-Stain_ < *Dang* *Mustang*

  • @mikefule
    @mikefule 5 років тому +441

    Back in my day, when someone set out to become a real rocker (as we said then) too quickly, we called them a "nugget". New jacket, shiny patches, obsession with one particular band, talking about it all the time, buying pre-aged denim, and cutting holes in it with mum's best scissors. Just listen to the music you like, see the bands you like, wear the clothes you like, and you may find that you have somehow become a metal head. (Or you may find that as your tastes develop, they lead you elsewhere.)

    • @HeathenwoodOfficial
      @HeathenwoodOfficial 4 роки тому +27

      I love this peaceful approach.

    • @mihnearosu1542
      @mihnearosu1542 2 роки тому

      Poser

    • @daveinthegrave2703
      @daveinthegrave2703 2 роки тому +9

      Rule of thumb i learn, "Metalheads" dnt make it obvious that they are or make it obvious with style....the faster you find out its the way of living rather than trying to prove it, you will seemingly less become the metalhead

  • @jaydenvessel8761
    @jaydenvessel8761 5 років тому +200

    I died when he started on the phil Anselmo and pantera rant, subbed immediately

    • @elrooster7753
      @elrooster7753 5 років тому +8

      For reals f*** this dude...

    • @GCeara-mh5it
      @GCeara-mh5it 5 років тому +15

      @@elrooster7753
      The truth hurts, but Phil was chanting racism, and he also did the Nazi salute.
      But you know what, I don't care.
      I love Pantera. And Phil Anselmo is one of the realist dudes in metal.
      By the way, I'm Pakistani.

    • @Metalkid1500
      @Metalkid1500 4 роки тому +9

      He even owned up to doing it, but he’s not a racist. He did it while drunk, and he did it cause there were hecklers in the crowd and his dumb ass was drunk and decided to be an edge lord. Was it smart? Fuck no. But he’s not even remotely racist. Watch the interview with Eddie Trunk.

    • @Privatepyle69
      @Privatepyle69 4 роки тому

      Timestamp please?

    • @northernguerrilla3168
      @northernguerrilla3168 4 роки тому +1

      @@Metalkid1500 do you not believe what Robb flynn said about how racist he really is?
      I dont care if true or not myself,,I will be an anselmo fan till the day I die and believe everyone has the right to an opinion no matter if I agree with it or not.

  • @JaredDines_
    @JaredDines_ 6 років тому +4863

    LMAO

  • @the-groovelord
    @the-groovelord 6 років тому +649

    In the name of Lemmy, Dimebag, and the Holy Diver, Amen.

    • @Padre619
      @Padre619 5 років тому +9

      I got my first kutte today and am ready to pray to Lemmy for Easter morning

    • @Mdmelastrange
      @Mdmelastrange 5 років тому +23

      May Ozzy bless us all!

    • @ATHN88
      @ATHN88 5 років тому +8

      rip Dimebag

    • @firdausradzuan5905
      @firdausradzuan5905 5 років тому +1

      Fuck dimebag.overrated.dimebag burning in hell now.

    • @firdausradzuan5905
      @firdausradzuan5905 5 років тому

      @@Mdmelastrange shut up you stupid emo kid.fuck ozzy.fuck black sabbath

  • @kmartwifi4491
    @kmartwifi4491 6 років тому +220

    So metal goes two ways
    -Thrash
    -everything else
    And Sabaton should only be used for workout music
    Alright I think I understand, will this be on the test?

  • @scottishbananaclan
    @scottishbananaclan 4 роки тому +36

    How to be a powermetal band
    1. Sing about war
    2. Have flamethrowers on stage
    3. Carry a tank around with you
    4. Have your vocalist have a rpg and shoot it at the crowd
    5. Carry 5000 pounds of explosives on the tour bus

  • @Noisius
    @Noisius 5 років тому +566

    Tip 1. Go to finland.

  • @KillbotAndGorGorAttack
    @KillbotAndGorGorAttack 6 років тому +1919

    Gotta have the "T" in "metal" as loud as Manowar! Good show dudes! \m/

    • @-1subswithoutuploadingavid621
      @-1subswithoutuploadingavid621 6 років тому +68

      Killbot&GorGorAttack!! MeTaL!

    • @_vez
      @_vez 6 років тому +52

      MeTTTTal

    • @alanrosebaum6687
      @alanrosebaum6687 6 років тому +39

      Killbot&GorGorAttack!! Love ur channel dude

    • @kaelanmcalpine2011
      @kaelanmcalpine2011 6 років тому +15

      We Die For Metal

    • @nicodemusexmachina1526
      @nicodemusexmachina1526 6 років тому +9

      Killbot&GorGorAttack!!
      I like past Dave Mustaine, just like I like past Metallica, & I love Metallica when Dave was the guitarist & with Cliff shredding on bass. (yes I know the original members but this was my favorite line-up)
      Scoopy doo chase music = my ex lol Grind on Killbot! \mXm/

  • @levimcelravy294
    @levimcelravy294 5 років тому +190

    Dave Mustaine actually attends the Alcoholic Anonymous meetings in the next town over from me.

  • @Dakkss
    @Dakkss 5 років тому +123

    "There's bullet shells lying around everywhere in America - WALMART, in Big Macs, in your apple pie..."
    Oof.

  • @arseniyplagov8105
    @arseniyplagov8105 5 років тому +321

    Beer and whisky - lol, I feel sorry for you, man!
    I took these when I was a beginner, before I found that true metal is all in the pomegranate's juice.

    • @arseniyplagov8105
      @arseniyplagov8105 5 років тому +3

      *After being brutally tortured, killed and injected with alcoholic venom*...
      Uggghhhh... o.O... I forgot to say....your... other tips... are still... good...i mean.... YRROS... bout that.....O.O....

    • @liam1558
      @liam1558 5 років тому +6

      It's perfect because it looks like blood! 😂

  • @Murgatron_666
    @Murgatron_666 6 років тому +670

    This video made me laugh so hard i choked on the shell casings in my Big Mac

  • @VoiceKulaka
    @VoiceKulaka 6 років тому +421

    But... I like Scooby Doo chase music...

    • @solomonthekaijudemon344
      @solomonthekaijudemon344 6 років тому +4

      The Power Puff Girls theme is better.

    • @scottbeater-man3714
      @scottbeater-man3714 6 років тому +3

      I personally don't consider ghost metal, but i like them.

    • @batteringram4376
      @batteringram4376 6 років тому

      FUCKING POSER

    • @FuraFaolox
      @FuraFaolox 5 років тому +1

      @@yr.t.5220 Checkmate right there

    • @sewerrat4539
      @sewerrat4539 5 років тому

      I never thought about it that way the only thing I hear is church thing idk about but satanic

  • @BlackSnow2389
    @BlackSnow2389 4 роки тому +88

    Me being a skinny, timid 15 year old beginner metalhead watching this and being told to kill and eat someone to gain weight and to know my alcohol so I can pass out at a concert get free used T-shirt.

  • @lucanicolosi4556
    @lucanicolosi4556 6 років тому +209

    scooby doo chase music is the best way to describe ghost ever

    • @rocknroll_jezus9233
      @rocknroll_jezus9233 6 років тому +4

      Holy fucking shit u right

    • @crazypunkgamer8329
      @crazypunkgamer8329 6 років тому +2

      @@rocknroll_jezus9233 I agree. Just listened to ghost and reminds me of my childhood watching Scooby doo movies

    • @Noided88815
      @Noided88815 5 років тому +4

      I fuckin love scooby doo chase music.

  • @niallooo
    @niallooo 6 років тому +234

    "Jesus , Mary and the other guy who didn't get laid "

    • @TheKarret
      @TheKarret 6 років тому +5

      the other guy, who didn't get laid to make a kid*
      None of the fun, all of the work. lool.

    • @rainerwahnsinn8411
      @rainerwahnsinn8411 6 років тому

      niall o brien hahahah

  • @loweffortproductions1985
    @loweffortproductions1985 6 років тому +524

    "In the metal world, there's only Thrash, and not Thrash." I guess Prog. Isn't good then? *laughs in 7/32*

    • @ChunkSchuldinga
      @ChunkSchuldinga 6 років тому +77

      *Laughs alternating between 11/8 and 23/16 and switching to 5/4 and 7/4 every 6th and 9th measure*

    • @ChunkSchuldinga
      @ChunkSchuldinga 6 років тому +15

      Fuck, I’m drunk.

    • @Chris-sv5zs
      @Chris-sv5zs 6 років тому +18

      P O L Y R H Y T H M S

    • @abcrx32j
      @abcrx32j 6 років тому +17

      Laughs in 9/16, rests in 11/8, keeps laughing in 21/32 while clapping in 12/16

    • @mlg_420quickscope
      @mlg_420quickscope 6 років тому

      >>>>>Implying this much

  • @QaysSyed
    @QaysSyed 4 роки тому +73

    "Get to know your alcohol"
    Me, someone below 21 in the United States: Interesting

    • @cursedcliff7562
      @cursedcliff7562 4 роки тому +9

      *Laughs in general European*

    • @lunahetfield
      @lunahetfield 4 роки тому +2

      Same idc if its illegal for me to drink beer in the states, i'll drown myself in the iron maiden beer and then i can die happily

    • @Reed5016
      @Reed5016 8 місяців тому

      Lmao. Same. I have one year to go.

  • @Tommyskylarr
    @Tommyskylarr 6 років тому +81

    Laughed at “Scooby-Doo chase music”. Love Ghost though.

  • @luckydominguez2654
    @luckydominguez2654 6 років тому +101

    *IF HE´S DEAD HE CAN´T SAY ANYTHING RIGHT?* Me: Taking Notes

  • @PeteShredz
    @PeteShredz 6 років тому +15

    As a metalhead veteran since 1980 I fully support this guys advice.

  • @wolftooth281
    @wolftooth281 5 років тому +34

    "You should dispose of yourself" I want that on a t-shirt now!

  • @vkdrummer1364
    @vkdrummer1364 6 років тому +88

    As a brazilian metalhead, the brazilian patched vest black market is actually pretty spot on. Be prepared to spend a whole lot of money on one shit stained Bolt Thrower patch that has almost been ripped in half. But don't worry, it's metal as fuck.

    • @ThrashedTV
      @ThrashedTV 6 років тому +1

      Trust I'm well versed with the black market patch trading lol.

    • @daemoniatropikalis5523
      @daemoniatropikalis5523 6 років тому +3

      Difícil é quando a banda é underground e para de fazer show, ninguém tem os patches e não dá pra comprar no show

    • @vkdrummer1364
      @vkdrummer1364 6 років тому +2

      Hoje mesmo comecei a fazer uns patches porque mil bandas não tem kkkk

    • @daemoniatropikalis5523
      @daemoniatropikalis5523 6 років тому

      Sim, ajuda bastante quando você tem uns amigos que trabalham com costura, estampa e essas coisas também, como não tenho muitos dons artísticos fica meio difícil aksha

    • @amandabadlands
      @amandabadlands 6 років тому

      VKDrummer bom saber

  • @bombarded15
    @bombarded15 5 років тому +614

    As a huge Sabaton fan - had to slap a like on this.

  • @ballardogrady1412
    @ballardogrady1412 6 років тому +102

    In America we typically find our spare bullet shells littered across public school campuses.

    • @theshamanofenterprise7408
      @theshamanofenterprise7408 6 років тому +4

      oh shit XD

    • @asvilesgmailacct5091
      @asvilesgmailacct5091 6 років тому +2

      Brutal

    • @abcrx32j
      @abcrx32j 6 років тому

      There's always good people that go to schools and give students some bullets to help them to be metal enough to survive

    • @Live2Win230
      @Live2Win230 6 років тому

      I actually have found bullets at my school shout out to the SoCal ghettos

  • @polonskey5447
    @polonskey5447 5 років тому +174

    The semi-casual is me but im not even angry, Nightwish, Ghost and Sabaton are great, idgaf if people think it's shit, gotta love some power metal

    • @rodaki9408
      @rodaki9408 4 роки тому +12

      Sabaton is good, Sabaton fanbase is garbage, ghost is mediocre, but not metal. (It's not good, but I've heard worse)
      I haven't listened to enough Nightwish to have an opinion of it.

    • @whosaidthat84
      @whosaidthat84 4 роки тому +33

      This whole video is very tongue-in-cheek. A satire on the metal community.

    • @veetilappalainen6622
      @veetilappalainen6622 4 роки тому +4

      Sabaton and nightwish are great but im more like black metal guy

    • @darthultor6365
      @darthultor6365 4 роки тому +3

      @@rodaki9408 whats wrong with sabatons fanbase? Seen Them a couple of Times no complaints

    • @yourcoffeepal
      @yourcoffeepal 4 роки тому +3

      I listen to sabaton ghost and night wish and I think they're good. And people who think they can say that's wrong because they say it are annoying. And people like you are good.

  • @shameisontownsend4057
    @shameisontownsend4057 5 років тому +449

    1. Acid Bath
    2. Pantera
    3. Slipknot
    4. Goatwhore
    5. White zombie
    6. Korn
    7. Slayer
    8. Megadeth

    • @1m3agle
      @1m3agle 5 років тому +28

      ur missing the #1 band from the big 4 (hint: table)

    • @sheepwithcorpsepaint8710
      @sheepwithcorpsepaint8710 5 років тому +5

      Daniel Cook I love 'em.

    • @opium-w9s
      @opium-w9s 5 років тому +37

      Soad

    • @Mr.Plant1994
      @Mr.Plant1994 5 років тому +18

      These are okay bands, but you are missing some...

    • @milos8518
      @milos8518 5 років тому +22

      Where is metallica?!?!?!?

  • @kxlledbyshxrks
    @kxlledbyshxrks 5 років тому +644

    I feel personally attacked 😂 im fucking 5’1, 100 lbs, and NOBODY takes me seriously when i tell them ‘oh yea my favorite band is probably Cannibal Corpse or Dying Fetus’ 😂 thanks amigo

    • @martinreid2352
      @martinreid2352 5 років тому +19

      Kelseyyy Elizabeth looks like you just haven’t met the people looking for women who say that yet!

    • @scottalexander6016
      @scottalexander6016 5 років тому +23

      I have a 4'11" woman like that so I take you seriously.

    • @oscarcutface1353
      @oscarcutface1353 5 років тому +1

      I believe you

    • @isaacholloway5137
      @isaacholloway5137 5 років тому +6

      Lmao you're good, I'm less than 140 lbs and the only metal I listen to is deathmetal

    • @treygc3291
      @treygc3291 5 років тому

      Got any Cannubal Corpse songs? I only know Hammer Smashed Face right now.

  • @ppaulisdeadd2710
    @ppaulisdeadd2710 6 років тому +107

    Oh fuck, right off the bat that comment about wearing a Death shirt is so damn true haha. It's 50% *edge* 50% _safe_ It's like the Mario of metal shirts - perfectly balanced stats.

  • @maxstewart3460
    @maxstewart3460 5 років тому +39

    "He was talking about the White Power Ranger" 🤣🤣

  • @veronikamaksi5884
    @veronikamaksi5884 6 років тому +54

    Your hair is better than my future. 😂

  • @creepingcrawley6520
    @creepingcrawley6520 5 років тому +337

    Man my favourite is Black Veil Brides, True Norwegian Black Metal!

    • @creepingcrawley6520
      @creepingcrawley6520 5 років тому +8

      Piece Of crap bruhh

    • @cartercarter7295
      @cartercarter7295 5 років тому +22

      RoyMusic1 1 no panic at the disco

    • @niknak8299
      @niknak8299 5 років тому +27

      RoyMusic1 1 True Norwegian black Metal is the fucking Smith’s, those guys made Varg shit himself one time.

    • @Kuso319
      @Kuso319 5 років тому +15

      I listen to BVB but I don't claim they're metal lmao

    • @snwia9i281
      @snwia9i281 5 років тому +12

      @@Kuso319 it's sarcasm

  • @thefail1999
    @thefail1999 6 років тому +41

    "He was talking about the white power ranger" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • @zadoruphin7794
    @zadoruphin7794 5 років тому +50

    Why does this man look like a Canadian Cliff Burton...

  • @haydenr5128
    @haydenr5128 5 років тому +79

    “Tony Iommi is a god and Geezer is a priest”
    Best quote ever!

  • @JEKYLLx0
    @JEKYLLx0 5 років тому +92

    So I made my belt with materials I found on schools and Texas

    • @copyofacopyofa
      @copyofacopyofa 4 роки тому +16

      you made your belt out of texas?
      holy fuck that's metal as shit

    • @cursedcliff7562
      @cursedcliff7562 4 роки тому

      @@copyofacopyofa Texas is denim in Serbian, get rekt

  • @TheRainmustFall7
    @TheRainmustFall7 6 років тому +390

    Is it legal to kill people who wear thrash shirts and hats but have no idea what it means or stands for ?

    • @ThrashedTV
      @ThrashedTV 6 років тому +65

      Death Angel Yes

    • @ChaosWarlord
      @ChaosWarlord 6 років тому +66

      What kind of a fucking stupid question is that? Of course it's legal. And it's not only legal, but encouraged and rewarded.

    • @SuperCraft1999
      @SuperCraft1999 6 років тому +9

      Satan Himself those t shirts are referring to the magazine, not music

    • @TokyoDripp
      @TokyoDripp 6 років тому +6

      Satan Himself poser

    • @TokyoDripp
      @TokyoDripp 6 років тому +4

      Satan Himself mmfff so romantic 😍

  • @StrangerE0ns
    @StrangerE0ns 5 років тому +256

    Was listening to bat country in school.
    Friend walks up reads:
    “Bat country? He, you listen to country?”
    And I’m like: “🤦‍♂️ no, it’s metal. Not country.”
    Then he’s like: “oh you listen to that”
    -“yeah.”
    Then there’s those who where shirts like AC/DC, Guns N’ Roses, Metallica even, and other bands, and when asked if they’re fans they reply:
    “No, it just looks cool.”
    Especially nirvana shirts for some reason. Lots of em at school. Probably because it has a smiley face on it.
    This is the filth I’m surrounded by

    • @vio-lence7267
      @vio-lence7267 5 років тому +25

      Yea me too man. I live in Sweden and recently i went up to someone in school with a Metallica shirt. So i was like Cool u like Metallica and the dude went yea comfy clothes. And then i said, No i meant the band Metallica. And he fuckin goes " The band?"

    • @haley7312
      @haley7312 4 роки тому +5

      Hey I wear most of those shirts and I know the bands and love the music, I’m an outcast because of it but I don’t care because ROCK ON (yes that needed to be in caps you idiots)

    • @epic_toasterbath6723
      @epic_toasterbath6723 4 роки тому +5

      This girl at my school wears nirvana shirts but i know she probably listens to rap or lizzo

    • @moviemakerclips4246
      @moviemakerclips4246 4 роки тому +7

      Ya I’m afraid that people will think I’m a poser because I almost only wear Metallica shirts. But I have to many for people to think I’m a poser. And they are not just the Metallica logo. Its like a LOT of blood, skeletons and other stuff like that.
      I saw a girl from my grade wearing a Metallica shirt that was like black with only the logo and i was like ”spits” DISGUSTING

    • @kormendymatyas8667
      @kormendymatyas8667 4 роки тому +2

      @@epic_toasterbath6723 well you can listen to loads of stuff

  • @Farvann
    @Farvann 6 років тому +188

    Just discovered this channel. Nice!

    • @aylinmaiden4258
      @aylinmaiden4258 5 років тому +1

      Just discovered your channel😉🤘

    • @djsigmann
      @djsigmann 5 років тому

      Lol, just watched some of your videos

  • @kowabungaus1820
    @kowabungaus1820 6 років тому +68

    I was relieved to see this was parody. Subbed.
    Turns out I was already subbed to this channel, who knew.

  • @lil_villian5124
    @lil_villian5124 3 роки тому +47

    This was the first video from the channel that I've seen and that was almost 2 years ago. I was listening to mostly Metallica and Slipknot at the time and had no idea about all of the amazing thrash and deathmetal bands from the underground scene. Bonded by Blood was really the first raw thrash album I ever heard because of you guys, and now I'm listening to insane bands from Dark Angel to Cryptopsy. Last year I made myself a battle jacket because of Chris and it has come along very greatly. I wouldn't be the metalhead I am today if it wasn't for you guys, and I'm growing every day. Thank you! \m/

  • @shadowgun22
    @shadowgun22 4 роки тому +21

    So I’m new to metal, I’ve listened to it in the gym occasionally but have actually started listening to it more more occasionally due to me starting to playing bass 3 months ago. My biggest fear about going to a metal concert is getting harrassed for my skin color. I know it’s 2020 and all, but after seeing a recent video of someone on stage saying White power...I have become more hesitant. It sucks because I wanna smoke joints and take shots and just enjoy the musicianship. Maybe I’m overthinking and the majority of the crowd will be on my side and not just look the other way if things happen, I did hear that a majority of the metal community is wholesome.

    • @supercouchpotato9698
      @supercouchpotato9698 Рік тому

      Obviously I can't speak for everyone, but I like to be friendly with all other metal fans, regardless of skin color, and I don't think anyone shouldn't.

    • @axsuriaa
      @axsuriaa Рік тому

      get a non poser shirt and u should be good to go

    • @DrinkingBleachOnTheBeach
      @DrinkingBleachOnTheBeach Рік тому +2

      Ik I’m three years late but you’ll be fine as long as you avoid NSBM

    • @axsuriaa
      @axsuriaa Рік тому

      facts@@DrinkingBleachOnTheBeach

    • @tonygriffin3464
      @tonygriffin3464 7 місяців тому

      Been to shows yet? I hope so.

  • @danit.samuel8751
    @danit.samuel8751 5 років тому +67

    Unless you love metal by all your heart
    And feel happy even when it's a brutal song you're listening to
    You can't be a true Metalhead

    • @TheFedeGamer99
      @TheFedeGamer99 5 років тому +1

      Dani T. Samuel what do you mean by brutal? like brutal death or sad like doom

    • @hendrikkiefer3325
      @hendrikkiefer3325 4 роки тому

      @@TheFedeGamer99 If you hearing Arch Enemy or something but still chilled

    • @HeathenwoodOfficial
      @HeathenwoodOfficial 4 роки тому +2

      I guess that rules out every old school 80's Metalhead

  • @flixoran9039
    @flixoran9039 5 років тому +519

    How many metal elitists will hunt me down and kill me if I say I love ghost and avenged sevenfold?

  • @josheberhardt4030
    @josheberhardt4030 5 років тому +34

    I love the way killbot says "THE MET-ALL!"

  • @nottodaydevilshindowraithe501
    @nottodaydevilshindowraithe501 4 роки тому +33

    REAL way to be a metalhead: You can't, not yet atleast, as we cannot turn our heads into any form metal.

  • @aidanlarose6901
    @aidanlarose6901 6 років тому +388

    Tip 1: Korn.
    Tip 2: Tool.
    Tip 3: Slipknot
    Tip 4: Circle Pits.
    Tip 5: BMTH or BVB = NOT METAL
    Tip 6: Lemmy Kilmister is god.
    Tip 7: Pantera = God tier
    Tip 8: Stomp on a kitten
    Tip 9: Short hair = not metal
    Tip 10: Gojira.
    Tip 11: Tool again
    Tip 12: Brompton Cocktail.
    Tip 13: 9 String guitars only.
    Tip 14: Guitars used by bands must be pointy
    Tip 15: The more countries they’re banned from, the better.
    Tip 16: If you don’t break your neck while headbanging, you’re not doing it right.
    Tip 17: Thrash and Progressive are the best genres. Think of Tool.
    Tip 18: Did I mention Tool?
    Tip 19: Metalcore is inferior to all genres.
    Tip 20: The forbidden word is “Nickelback”

  • @DistortedAudio2001
    @DistortedAudio2001 6 років тому +146

    Chris is love. Chris is life.

  • @pipaa010
    @pipaa010 6 років тому +33

    When your name is Julian and it appears in the video and you love Ghost and Sabaton

  • @shevanel92
    @shevanel92 5 років тому +62

    "Nightwish"
    First of all, how dare you

    • @ei6728
      @ei6728 5 років тому

      shevanel92 why

    • @TheKaiTetley
      @TheKaiTetley 5 років тому

      shevanel92. 2nd..HOW...DARE...YOU...🤬🤬🤬

  • @melakiesimrak2758
    @melakiesimrak2758 6 років тому +75

    "Worst case Ontario"
    Frig off, Ricky.

    • @ThrashedTV
      @ThrashedTV 6 років тому +2

      Fuck off Bobandy

    • @jhofffilms
      @jhofffilms  6 років тому +12

      Frig off Mr. Lahey!

    • @MosoKaiser
      @MosoKaiser 6 років тому +3

      Alright, smokes, let's go!

    • @katesawyer6188
      @katesawyer6188 6 років тому +2

      There's more to life than gettin drunk and eating chicken fingers ricky

    • @MrJ-rw2hb
      @MrJ-rw2hb 6 років тому

      Melakie Simrak ya FUCK ONTARIO!

  • @mukadex98
    @mukadex98 6 років тому +69

    Legit butt hurt about the Sabaton joke xD

  • @grandersongraf402
    @grandersongraf402 6 років тому +397

    BRING BACK HOW TO BE A METAL VOCALIST.

    • @jhofffilms
      @jhofffilms  6 років тому +75

      But you already know how to be a metal vocalist... We did like 13 videos how do you not know by now??

    • @DD_Vandal
      @DD_Vandal 6 років тому +41

      Jhofffilms maybe he is a slow learner

    • @SnowTheJamMan
      @SnowTheJamMan 6 років тому +35

      Jhofffilms We still don't know crust punk though

    • @jhofffilms
      @jhofffilms  6 років тому +37

      Fair enough I'll keep that in mind.

    • @chrisgreely5958
      @chrisgreely5958 6 років тому

      What about crust punk?

  • @edgelord590
    @edgelord590 2 роки тому +4

    i dont think ppl realize this video is mostly satire lmfao i was dying

  • @delideluxe2327
    @delideluxe2327 6 років тому +39

    The metal god Rob halford and Lemmy have gifted us with this masterpiece.

  • @literallysatan2145
    @literallysatan2145 5 років тому +30

    it's the way it is, Chris looks like Thorin Oakenshield

  • @katsuki_fan2465
    @katsuki_fan2465 6 років тому +33

    I guess I’m semi-casual then. I’m literally wearing a Ghost tee right now. Oops. 🤷🏻‍♀️

  • @therealemo9045
    @therealemo9045 4 роки тому +9

    "DON'T LET ANYONE KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO HOT TOPIC"
    #yes

  • @rollingrock2561
    @rollingrock2561 6 років тому +45

    This moment when Jhofffilms have a new video...

    • @jhofffilms
      @jhofffilms  6 років тому +11

      We're like Pennywise the clown. Only coming out to play every 27 years.

    • @MrCapone1996
      @MrCapone1996 6 років тому

      Jhofffilms ANTISOCIAL!!!

  • @hanhil3673
    @hanhil3673 6 років тому +179

    All I want to know is your haircare routine.

    • @ThrashedTV
      @ThrashedTV 6 років тому +25

      Several de-tangling products and patience.

    • @eleanorrigby7914
      @eleanorrigby7914 6 років тому +9

      BEER

    • @TrulyOutrageous
      @TrulyOutrageous 6 років тому +5

      Lanun Lhungdim A Tout Le Monde beer

    • @imaclown12345
      @imaclown12345 6 років тому +8

      Lanun Lhungdim all jokes aside, argan oil is what you need for your hair. It’s really good at detangling long hair and just make the hair feel so much better. It’s like a hangover cure for your hair.

    • @hanhil3673
      @hanhil3673 6 років тому +5

      LVD1 Oh thanks for the tip. But tbh I was wondering more in the line of how did he get it to be so thick and luscious and so alive... Is it weird that I am jealous of a metalhead dude because of his hair? Which looks like it'll smell like roses and all that jazz inspite of his insistent claim of unhygienicity.

  • @picciloson
    @picciloson 6 років тому +175

    Thrash video as always, keep up the real facts.

  • @morguebomb4406
    @morguebomb4406 4 роки тому +10

    When he brought up how there’s bullet shells everywhere in America I remember a time I was walking home from school and I found I think shotgun shells and then another time I found 45 cells I think

  • @Girl_In_Bread
    @Girl_In_Bread 5 років тому +40

    not gonna lie, those sticks are the same shape as the Angelmaker logo

    • @cxli9774
      @cxli9774 5 років тому +1

      TCF7 ANGELMAKERRR

  • @George28630
    @George28630 6 років тому +8

    I lost it when he said “which means you spent all your money on Slayer’s farewell tour”

  • @metalman1492
    @metalman1492 6 років тому +42

    That bass line in the beginning tho

  • @nathancottrill1363
    @nathancottrill1363 3 роки тому +5

    As for being 95lbs and Sabaton…. One of the greatest war heros of our time was a small framed tiny man that went by the name of Audie Murphy. A 5ft 5” 112lb man, who climbed upon a burning tank and single handedly stopped a German Assault with the machine gun mounted on said burning tank. Audie was Metal as Fuck. He had the size of 15 Bull Sharks, 16 elephants, and 20 Lions pumping in his veins dispute his tiny stature. 🍻🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼 Sabaton even wrote a song about this tiny man. Pretty crazy stuff man.

  • @TheAnderson41011
    @TheAnderson41011 6 років тому +24

    Chris is my spirit animal

  • @felixhamel2398
    @felixhamel2398 6 років тому +11

    The first argument about Death is legit af

  • @thebigflyingninja5242
    @thebigflyingninja5242 5 років тому +19

    Death is a good band
    RIP Chuck Schuldiner

  • @york2353
    @york2353 5 років тому +56

    Me: doesnt really have any interest in metal
    Also me: this video seems like quality content

    • @henriquemontalvao8492
      @henriquemontalvao8492 5 років тому +9

      May I reccomend you listen to the rust in peace album?

    • @HeathenwoodOfficial
      @HeathenwoodOfficial 4 роки тому +7

      Some good starters:
      Iron Maiden - "Wasted Years"
      Judas Priest - "Rock Hard, Ride Free"
      Dio - "The Last in Line"
      Angel Witch - "Angel Witch"
      Pentagram - "Sign of the Wolf"

  • @reyinsarcade
    @reyinsarcade 6 років тому +247

    Im a metal head and im a loner :(/

    • @petersonmasoryde3163
      @petersonmasoryde3163 6 років тому +32

      hey dude im a female metalhead. you arent alone on here but you know standing out from the crowd is fun, and interesting.

    • @Puchowalkerturner
      @Puchowalkerturner 5 років тому +4

      Same here! 😎 \m/

    • @Mx.Dmg1999
      @Mx.Dmg1999 5 років тому +15

      Dude you are never alone in the metal community! \m/

    • @reyinsarcade
      @reyinsarcade 5 років тому +11

      You guys are my family, thank you!!!

    • @Rivwe
      @Rivwe 5 років тому +4

      Bro same
      There’s a metalhead/rocker guy in my orchestra class that I have a huge fucking crush on but I’m not sure how he feels about me :(

  • @ringothemotherfuckinflamin2636
    @ringothemotherfuckinflamin2636 6 років тому +21

    watched this in a hot topic black sabbath t shirt that i got when i was 15

  • @bradyward2177
    @bradyward2177 6 років тому +19

    That Phil Anselmo thing is too true

  • @joannaaxb3580
    @joannaaxb3580 5 років тому +13

    Tyskie! Greetings from polish metalhead 🇵🇱 ! Slayer kurwa

  • @emiliantoutkewicz9286
    @emiliantoutkewicz9286 6 років тому +20

    Let me give some advice for beginner metalheads, it may sound pretentious but I just wanted to let you all guys know of the bands that are the most important to me as a metalhead, some of these bands are not for beginner metalheads but you will find at least 5 new dream bands in this list I can guarantee. It's mostly Death Metal but also some Thrash, Black and Doom, and 3 bands who don't belong in any of these categories, there are a lot of other bands I love but these are the main ones. Here are the 33 bands:
    Blut Aus Nord, Obscura (the German Technical Death Metal), Esoteric (the UK Funeral Doom), Evoken, Swallow The Sun, Symphony X, Cannibal Corpse, Thy Darkened Shade, Morbid Angel, Immolation, Suffocation, Deeds Of Flesh, Necrophagist, Horna, Meshuggah, Watain, (early) In Flames, Arkona (the Russian folk metal band), Kampfar, Rammstein, Gojira, Dissection, Ahab, Edge Of Sanity, Slayer, Sodom, Exodus, Kreator, Enslaved, Decapitated, Novembers Doom, My Dying Bride and (early aka 3 first albums) Satyricon

    • @emiliantoutkewicz9286
      @emiliantoutkewicz9286 6 років тому +2

      I do not intend to intrude or pretend that they are objectively better, I just feel the need to promote these bands, especially those of them that are more underground because they need more love, hope you will understand

    • @emiliantoutkewicz9286
      @emiliantoutkewicz9286 6 років тому +2

      Great video by the way

    • @djsigmann
      @djsigmann 5 років тому

      Wow, somebody else actually knows Kampfar.

    • @rutgerhermens7308
      @rutgerhermens7308 5 років тому

      Kampfar isn't an underground band. They won a fucking award.

    • @naughtydog201
      @naughtydog201 5 років тому

      Rebirth Burning If I may ask. Unless you accidentally left it out, why is Death not on this list if you enjoy death metal? In my personal view, they would be on any metal list long before many of these other guys (in the death category that is)

  • @karlo6862
    @karlo6862 5 років тому +37

    Thanks for mentioning my favourite band, Sabaton

  • @gasolineenema6895
    @gasolineenema6895 6 років тому +6

    you literally described the exact youtube path i took before i found you guys

  • @radoslavdimitrov7505
    @radoslavdimitrov7505 Рік тому +3

    3:18 I both agree and disagree. If you enjoy the music itself nothing can stop you from listening to it and enjoying it, even the lack of beer. Even water can be metal

  • @milotimberlake2047
    @milotimberlake2047 6 років тому +22

    Jhoff is back!!!

    • @eddiesparxx2715
      @eddiesparxx2715 6 років тому +1

      The eighties were a really terrible Pant-era I love the 80’s, but your user name made me laugh

    • @THRASHMETALFUNRIFFS
      @THRASHMETALFUNRIFFS 6 років тому

      /w\ METAL /w\

  • @KaoswareMetal
    @KaoswareMetal 6 років тому +237

    thumbs up for the Municipal Waste hat !

    • @brucecurleyjr
      @brucecurleyjr 6 років тому

      Kaosware he wears it all the time though :/

    • @DavidNwokoye
      @DavidNwokoye 6 років тому +4

      Kaosware you're everywhere man. You watch the same UA-camrs I do.

    • @KaoswareMetal
      @KaoswareMetal 6 років тому +1

      David Nwokoye what can I say... you have good taste :)

    • @Intermentor
      @Intermentor 6 років тому

      Honestly I thought it was a Municipal Waste member

    • @kevinrodriguez9701
      @kevinrodriguez9701 6 років тому

      Municipal waste is going to fuck you up

  • @PirateFilms95
    @PirateFilms95 6 років тому +39

    don't say anything about sabaton, don't say anything about sabaton, don't say anything about sabaton....

  • @Bentons-Crib
    @Bentons-Crib 9 місяців тому +1

    writing these down like they're the last bits of scientific knowledge that will enlighten a post-apocalyptic world

  • @tuna6963
    @tuna6963 5 років тому +26

    "Dave Mustardstain"

  • @chipmanly1359
    @chipmanly1359 5 років тому +263

    How to be metal 101
    Step 1: listen to Limp Bizkit

  • @alanrosebaum6687
    @alanrosebaum6687 6 років тому +13

    I predicted this video started with him opening a beer... I was right

  • @Whatsgood164
    @Whatsgood164 Рік тому +2

    I’m a sixth grader and I feel like this is a great life strategy to follow