125. My Ex Reached out Then Disappeared

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  • Опубліковано 6 вер 2024
  • In this video Rory discusses what to do if your EX reaches out and then disappears! He also goes into why this might have happened.
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    #NoContact #exback #breakups

КОМЕНТАРІ • 262

  • @umpalumpa-qw8ru
    @umpalumpa-qw8ru 5 років тому +211

    A video about 'Do I really want my ex back or is it my ego' would be great. I think a lot people, including me, are not sure if they miss their ex, just the time we had or if it's just our ego that's still hurt

    • @someguy9520
      @someguy9520 5 років тому +18

      Agree. First 4 weeks I really wanted her back. 8th week and i DEFINITELY don't want her back. Maybe as a friend in a few months but nothing more.
      Cause getting down to reality lead to me realizing that it was actually a huge win that she broke up with me

    • @umpalumpa-qw8ru
      @umpalumpa-qw8ru 5 років тому +6

      congrats, that should be the goal. I'm 3 month in and not really sure if I want her back. Part of me does, another not. It's strange @@someguy9520

    • @TheALLYISLAME
      @TheALLYISLAME 5 років тому

      umpalumpa2019 Yes agreed!

    • @someguy9520
      @someguy9520 5 років тому +6

      @@umpalumpa-qw8ru 3 months is already quite some time. Have you thought about incompatibilities and the negative aspects of your partner? I realized that I was simply seetling down for less

    • @umpalumpa-qw8ru
      @umpalumpa-qw8ru 5 років тому +9

      Yeah, I have but then I think 'Hey, nobody's perfect, everyone got its flaws'. ;). But I'm doing a lot better than even 1 month ago. I feel like my ex has become a stranger to me. Hard to describe. But maybe that's what moving feels like. The once so clear image of your ex slowly fading away @@someguy9520

  • @shuhanak8797
    @shuhanak8797 5 років тому +169

    Reaching out and disappearing continuously and inconsistencies in their behaviour and that too with meaningless messages ....its called poking the wounds.

    • @MelodyMaryRoche
      @MelodyMaryRoche 5 років тому +20

      Here's a fundamental truth of life that will alleviate you from all pain and disappointment. You.cannot.control.anyone's.actions. You can only control your reaction. Don't give them the power of hurting you. Most often, they are not doing so intentionally. You are a fucking goddess. A complete magnet for men. I think human nature makes us put people on a pedestal. Don't put him on a pedestal. Yes, you have history together but because he left, he should be in the same category as the other guys chasing you. YOU are the queen. YOU are the prize.

    • @xonlytyrek3601
      @xonlytyrek3601 4 роки тому +15

      Facts. My EX was the QUEEN! Of doin all this. Constantly ghosting, then coming back, then disappearing. Then coming back. I couldn’t read her she would say how she doesn’t know if she want a relationship, she’s not ready, bla bla but still continued to wanna chat. It honestly frustrated me so much brah. It’s best to just Move on and completely ignore they ass if they act like this. I WISH I knew this sooner.

    • @63MIJ63
      @63MIJ63 4 роки тому +2

      Xonly Tyrek damn this exact thing is happening to me right now. I'm currently being ignored again. Doesn't even open the message to read

    • @xonlytyrek3601
      @xonlytyrek3601 4 роки тому +4

      Mat Mk1 that’s even worse bro, move on, Stop trying!. and if she even hits you up, ignore her ass right back. Give her the same energy she’s giving you, females can’t take the taste of their own medicine

    • @63MIJ63
      @63MIJ63 4 роки тому

      Xonly Tyrek think that's the only way. Although I dint like lowering myself to ignoring someone , it's rude but the only way

  • @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536
    @marcvslicinivscrassvs7536 4 роки тому +59

    It is indeed a victory. I have no intentions in getting back with my ex, but the fact that she reached out first, and continues to reach out feels good. By doing No Contact and learning to be alone, I feel much stronger.

  • @krystalo9915
    @krystalo9915 5 років тому +87

    My ex reached out , I replied. Then I disappeared because the conversation doesn’t spark joy.

    • @TheLoveChat
      @TheLoveChat  5 років тому +31

      I see what you did there.

    • @1wolfpen
      @1wolfpen 4 роки тому +1

      Lmao

    • @jahrassicsound312
      @jahrassicsound312 4 роки тому

      Did the same thing today

    • @chisomoffor6877
      @chisomoffor6877 2 роки тому

      My ex called I missed the call , then I made sure he missed mine rang for like 12 seconds and disappeared

  • @vickirudd5259
    @vickirudd5259 5 років тому +83

    Sounds like a narcissistic "hoover" to me. 🙄 Vanishing magicians. They'll reach out again if they can't find any other good supply.

    • @brianhill6842
      @brianhill6842 5 років тому +1

      Vicki Rudd wow! Don’t even get me started on Narcissism. I haven’t received the Hoover though.

    • @brianhill6842
      @brianhill6842 5 років тому +2

      @ Rory is it still considered a rebound for them if they were only involved with you - for a limited time? I mean I don’t even know what we were and when were anything. So the fact they can be in a new relationship within two months of discarding you, is it still a rebound for them? I know. I shouldn’t even be asking this. I’m having that weird month 6 feeling.

  • @itsspookie
    @itsspookie 5 років тому +51

    This happens a lot to me. My ex would always reach out to me until I finally told her to leave me alone. Sometimes there's something there. Most of the time however, it seems our ex's just need a hit of validation to go on with their day. Loving someone who doesn't reciprocate is a destructive path friends. Deep down YOU KNOW the flaws of you two being together again. Don't ignore what's right in your face.

    • @joonapietila2573
      @joonapietila2573 5 років тому +2

      Yup. I wish people would get this, but most of them are so afraid of being alone that they're willing to accept any bs their ex/partner is throwing at em.

  • @90blacknight
    @90blacknight 5 років тому +170

    They disappear when they realize they can have you back at the snap of their fingers. DO NOT ASK THEM OUT when you first hear from them. Often they are just testing the waters. They want an ego boost, are lonely, bored, or have been dumped or hurt, and want to know if their comfort blanket is still available. The only way they'll come back for good is if they know they have to FIGHT for you. You are the prize! They need to EARN you back, and this will not happen if you play "eager beaver" and say, "So do you wanna hang out?" In their mind, they'll be thinking, "F**k, this desperate sap will take me back just like that after all these months? I'm not so sure I want this BETA cuck." Be the Alpha. This time around it's on THEM to make all the effort. Let them come to you and let them ask YOU out. If they are desperate enough to the point they fear losing you FOREVER, they will act!!!!!!

    • @michellefalco9773
      @michellefalco9773 4 роки тому +9

      they fight for u when they really crave u and miss u-if they dont-they wont-simple-emotionally not available-immature-hot cold-

    • @EJayyDreadHead
      @EJayyDreadHead 4 роки тому +4

      @@michellefalco9773 facts

    • @NaturallyHERS
      @NaturallyHERS 4 роки тому +4

      My ex reached out the day after Christmas after 3 weeks of no contact say: Good morning. I hope you enjoyed your Christmas with your family and hope you're enjoying your vacation as well. I replied 6 hours later saying: Good afternoon. Thank you. I am expecting something on New Years and I will let her know to stop contacting me at that point. I don't care about no damn holiday text. The shit is irrelevant. If I don't get anything, GOOD, but if I get a random text again of that nature some time during the new I will let her know not to contact me. Im guessin she was just bored or drinking or something.

    • @valentineterni1697
      @valentineterni1697 4 роки тому

      @@michellefalco9773 hey my ex msg me 6 months after NC I was shy and she was apologizing I'm done tbh then I saw her in tinder I was like wtf haha

    • @angiee9279
      @angiee9279 4 роки тому +3

      They will fight for you of they truly miss you and truly want you.
      The exception would be if they feel the need to protect themselves from you... such as in a case where you have hurt them and/or have given them reason not to trust you.

  • @vannhelsin2434
    @vannhelsin2434 5 років тому +52

    When they reach out ignore them this will make them go CRAZYYY

    • @mohammedkhan4088
      @mohammedkhan4088 5 років тому +8

      My ex reached out i ignored her for 4 days then she comes to my house while im at work and takes all her clothes what game is she playing now???

    • @vannhelsin2434
      @vannhelsin2434 5 років тому +7

      @@mohammedkhan4088 the crazzzy game lol

  • @MissSarahGM
    @MissSarahGM 5 років тому +68

    Narcissists hoovering : they come back just to check their grip on you.

  • @GirlsOnTop_
    @GirlsOnTop_ 5 років тому +35

    My story is quite different. We broke up on a good term even if I didn’t agree with it at first, he said he needs space and time for himself (and for sure, to see someone else) i was hurt. He reached out 3 times in 3 weeks of our break up to check if i’m okay.
    I still love him and want him back, but he needs to sort himself out. I’m not his options. He can’t just come and go.

  • @klougauxmarrons
    @klougauxmarrons 5 років тому +18

    I was one of the people who asked for this video, so thank you so much, Rory!
    My ex reached out three times and disappeared three times, we hung out, he likes things I post on social media... but he’s in a rebound relationship. So I totally agree, sometimes they’re just testing the waters but not in a steady emotional state that will allow the two of you to reconnect properly. Better to keep focusing on yourself and not put your life on hold for them. If they manage to assert what they want and it’s being with you, then great. If not, whatever.

  • @jumangiiowl664
    @jumangiiowl664 5 років тому +20

    126. How to be more attractive
    127. Reconciliation after cheating???
    Thank you and keep up the great work Rory!

    • @unKnown-zc8fe
      @unKnown-zc8fe 5 років тому +7

      Jumangii Owl I think I’ve told you before.. move on after being cheated on... not worth it

  • @joonapietila2573
    @joonapietila2573 5 років тому +50

    When the past comes knocking, do not answer. It has nothing new to tell. Just live life to the fullest without regrets. So what if u messed up ur last relationship? Learn from it and find someone better. We only live once, so mind as well just take the famous YOLO attitude and keep on being ur awesome self! Interesting content coach.

  • @jesserobert1152
    @jesserobert1152 5 років тому +48

    Thank you so much for this video Rory! This was exactly what I needed, because EXACTLY what you described happened to me. She finally reached out after 5 months around 12 AM, the next day the conversation barely started and she disappeared after telling me she was glad I was doing great. After this, I never reached out and continued with my life. I’m sure it won’t be the last time I’ll hear from her. But this victory feels good! The only games I play are video games :P

    • @LINKGT23
      @LINKGT23 5 років тому +5

      Jesse Robert sane thing with me !!!! 6 months of NC she reached out to me spoke on the phone for 10 mins, we set up a date , date comes says she can’t make to reschedule for next day , I respond next day tell her same time and place and haven’t heard anything 🤷🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️! O well who care I’m dating a lot now so I’m good !!

    • @jesserobert1152
      @jesserobert1152 5 років тому +3

      LINKGT23 It’s like they see us as forbidden fruit, they want us but are afraid to move forwards. Hence indecision and pulling away 🤷🏾‍♂️.

    • @joonapietila2573
      @joonapietila2573 5 років тому

      Fuck those insecure women, you were probably just a plan B for her. She fucked up the rebound and instantly came back to you. No sloppy seconds. Hang in there bro! Ignore the bitch and find someone worth of your time, you deserve it!

    • @LINKGT23
      @LINKGT23 5 років тому

      Jesse Robert how you holding you holding up brother ?? I hope good !!

    • @tabby__cat
      @tabby__cat 4 роки тому +1

      Any updates Jesse? I have a similar situation where my ex texted me 2 weeks ago to check up on how I was doing since we last spoke 3 months ago. After I said I was doing great, he said he was glad to hear I was doing well and then he disappeared after I thanked him. What a weirdo lol, but I'm nervous about not hearing back from him after this.

  • @simonsays9218
    @simonsays9218 5 років тому +20

    Thank you for this video man, it really helped me. My ex reached out last week and one thing led to another but now she dissapeared again. Im back in nc baby, i feel good :)

  • @tetehl4731
    @tetehl4731 5 років тому +26

    He reached out..then blocked me few weeks later.. then unblocked me again. Rinse and repeat. I didn't respond anymore. I'm busy doing myself 😊💪👌💖

    • @TheLoveChat
      @TheLoveChat  5 років тому +7

      Yes!!

    • @tetehl4731
      @tetehl4731 5 років тому +3

      @@rrrrrrraaaa9 I'll have to do this now. I'm so done with his game. Thanks.

    • @tetehl4731
      @tetehl4731 5 років тому +3

      @@TheLoveChat Thanks for responding. I've just done it. I was nervous but feel relief. I know I'll miss him but no I don't want to waste my time now with silly games.

  • @TheTouchofklass
    @TheTouchofklass 3 роки тому +8

    Sounds like an ex who doesn’t want you to move on, or it could be a Narcissistic Hoover attempt.

  • @alpamomo
    @alpamomo 5 років тому +29

    Can you do a video on mind games. Reaching out and dissapearing or trying to get a reaction from you like making you jealous.

  • @chenal7445
    @chenal7445 5 років тому +6

    Everyone talking about narcs, there is such a thing as the pendulum effect. They think it's a good idea, then they don't ☑️ I go through this too but I'm not a narcissist . Sometimes the spark just ain't There, or you realise they're not FOR YOU.

    • @karenzhang1020
      @karenzhang1020 4 роки тому

      Chenal A Right. We are all human so take it easy.

  • @alexanderfournier4710
    @alexanderfournier4710 5 років тому +15

    Signs they aren't coming back should be a topic.

  • @tinikadixon1764
    @tinikadixon1764 5 років тому +21

    My ex reached out after leaving me for someone else after 5 years...it’s been 4 months NC
    We have children asked me how are me and kids doing.
    😒 I said What do you want after 5 hours
    He never texted back oh well
    I’ll never chase or break the ice with someone who left me
    And we just had a baby girl she’s 1 month he hasn’t done nothing for our children or acknowledged them since he left.
    When he left he changed his number I could rely a message to him if I wanted but I did not
    I went cold also
    Now I get a text at 2:30am asking how me and kids are.
    I think that message pissed me off more than anything
    You ask how we are when you know wat you did to us?
    What!... I was still pregnant with our daughter when he left and took everything from us.
    But how are me and kids doing at 2:30am..
    Yeah it pissed me off big time!

    • @nurarich4945
      @nurarich4945 5 років тому +7

      Follow no contact,don’t show him anger ,they feed on your anger
      Don’t be or act friends with him either
      Just treat him like a nobody
      It hurts them when you don’t care.
      Practice self love and self care for you and your kids.don’t be bitter.
      Think of him as a dead person in your mind.

  • @victortouschang
    @victortouschang 4 роки тому +4

    my Ex called me yesterday after 5 months of no contact. We chatted for a while and I know that I need to set a date, but part of me just don't want to because this person hurt me way too much for me to be able to look into her and pretend nothing has happened....

  • @Outsider_aa
    @Outsider_aa 5 років тому +10

    Please keep these videos coming, focusing on yourself can be a wide area to cover, I really appreciate your content.

  • @Lee73Lee
    @Lee73Lee 5 років тому +5

    This happened to me twice too. We never did meet up. 7 months into the breakup. Likely just breadcrumbing me or not ready. Won’t respond next time.

  • @ProofThatAstrologyIsReal
    @ProofThatAstrologyIsReal 5 років тому +19

    A Test or still dealing with rebound probably both

  • @tybennion1
    @tybennion1 4 роки тому +11

    Ex reached out, we set a date, then night before date she bails saying she’s seeing someone and it wouldn’t be right to see an ex when that’s going on. Played it cool and did what Rory teaches.
    How lovely of her to reach our, set a date, cancel, and rub it in that she’s with someone else.

    • @Giovanni-01
      @Giovanni-01 3 роки тому +1

      Don't respond to her as long as that's the case

    • @5339kimhall
      @5339kimhall 2 роки тому

      She’ll be back but keep going.

  • @xxx_peachy_shea5123
    @xxx_peachy_shea5123 5 років тому +3

    Same thing happened to me. Your right it was jarring! But your right it was a Reach out and it is still a victory and I have moved on on getting better. Take the Power back! Thanks Rory!

  • @brianhill6842
    @brianhill6842 5 років тому +3

    Totally unrelated but ya’ll I strongly suggest downloading P!nks new song, “Hustle” and get yourself to the gym....alongside listening to Rory! Trust me...that song is going to set you on fire. Thank you for another great video Rory! ❤️

  • @mizzcrazygal
    @mizzcrazygal 4 роки тому +3

    Rory youre amazing! i did 6 weeks no contact because of all ur help in ur video! you kept me going!!! then he text me and i was healing but not 100% and i feel like he ruined it by reaching out! i would rather he reach out when i was 100% healed! now i feel like i’m back to stage 1

    • @missytaurus2258
      @missytaurus2258 4 роки тому +1

      Same situation hahahaha and now I can’t stop thinking about him again , back to stage 1 😤😤😤😤, why is he texting me againnnnnnnnnnnn

  • @JLayfield85
    @JLayfield85 5 років тому +6

    My ex reached out to me three weeks ago, then I responded 12 hours later. (I was asleep when she messaged me.) I haven’t heard a word from her since. So weird.

    • @Genes1s___
      @Genes1s___ 5 років тому

      Jeff Layfield I’m in the same boat right now! I’ve been since left on read, what do I do? Thanks for the response!🤞🏽

  • @cozettem8226
    @cozettem8226 5 років тому +11

    I think an ex reaching out than just disappearing is yet another Narcissistic ploy to feed their ego to see if they still have you on their hook. I notice my ex comes out of the woodwork either directly or indirectly when he gets wind that I’m seeing someone. He throws out a breadcrumbs then disappears which is mindfuckery at its finest as he knows how much it hurts me. He doesn’t care about me in the slightest it’s just to see if he can still have me or get me away from whomever I’m seeing.

    • @joonapietila2573
      @joonapietila2573 5 років тому +2

      Yup. Get those leeches out of your life. Find someone who deserves your time, you deserve it!

    • @michelelena6851
      @michelelena6851 2 роки тому

      what an ass to manipulate someones feelings by throwing breadcrumbs

  • @riverking3874
    @riverking3874 4 роки тому +2

    I screwed up. My ex reached out after 2 months and we talked back and forth for 3 weeks. She was on a rebound. We flirted, said she missed me, she still loved me, still thought about me and we hung out once and it went well. Then she went to disneyland and I found out she went with her rebound after all the hope she gave me and when she got back she said she couldn't risk it with me and I told her to not contact me while shes in this and that what she is doing is disrespectful. She told to not contact her and that I screwed everything up. Apologized and went nc again... fml I tested her and I think I messed up

  • @priyankachauhan3443
    @priyankachauhan3443 5 років тому +4

    My ex texted and said he misses me and when i asked him if he could talk to me in a call he ignored and never replied.

  • @user-mu2mp8ll6c
    @user-mu2mp8ll6c Рік тому

    Love this....there are so many experts on here all watching this video but somehow they all know the answers to every question and situation lol

  • @nury6197
    @nury6197 3 роки тому +4

    He reached out to me, asked me how i was doing. And then i told him i was too busy and would prob talk when we both had time for each other. And then said bye haha

  • @user-jx1cl3dc4c
    @user-jx1cl3dc4c 2 роки тому +1

    i needed to watch this thank u
    he reached out to me today and he said he'll contact me later and vanished lol.

  • @LINKGT23
    @LINKGT23 5 років тому +1

    Wow this is my situation!!!! 6 months of NC she reached out to me spoke on the phone for 10 mins, we set up a date , date comes says she can’t make to reschedule for next day , I respond next day tell her same time and place and haven’t heard anything 🤷🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️! O well who care I’m dating a lot now so I’m good !! THANKS RORY REALLY WANTED THIS VIDEO 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

  • @h22sparkle
    @h22sparkle 5 років тому +4

    When my ex reached out after ditching me for being real she asked questions about our son i already have visitation. I told her im at a meeting and i cant talk right now and she responded with emotions i kept on telling her i cant talk right now im at a meeting. It messed her head up and soon when she calls i just wont answer at all. It makes me feel good because im on my own time not hers and plus im with a woman that meets my standards so im good.

  • @mikeseager3401
    @mikeseager3401 4 роки тому +1

    Ex Reached out Yesterday at EXACTLY The 45 Day No Contact Mark. Said She Loved Me and Would Always Cherish the Memories. I Responded Back in Kind and Said Nothing Else. I Have NOT Heard from Her Today So Right Back to No Contact!!! HER LOSS!!!!!

    • @EJayyDreadHead
      @EJayyDreadHead 4 роки тому +1

      Don't reply next time she reaches out.. . Wait until she texts you at least 4 times

  • @KimK_AllDay
    @KimK_AllDay 3 роки тому +1

    I went no contact for 3 weeks. He texted a really sweet apology, expressed his love for me only to repeat the same inconsistency. I am so mad I entertained his texts. It's only been 2 days since we started communicating; I'm going back no contact. I know he's in a relationship, I just want peace.

  • @slyfly4829
    @slyfly4829 3 роки тому +1

    My ex reached out a few times. Once she asked for money for the kids. Once she asked for me to pick her up out of town because the girls was with didn't like her out of the blue too. Now she's being super distant. I don't get it

  • @kathia.4640
    @kathia.4640 3 роки тому +1

    My Ex (Avoidant), who broke up with me in the end of March 21 by phone, just called on day 138 of no contact. Not exactly direct, but asking if we could get back in contact...I''m just not sure what he wants now...still waiting until he makes it more clear. I told him when he broke it off back in march, i didn't want to be friends...so I hope that is not all he can do.

  • @shitchannel5027
    @shitchannel5027 4 роки тому +4

    my ex reached out and then aired me because i gave her a dead reply

  • @neverlistenkid
    @neverlistenkid 5 років тому +3

    Happened to me, that's why this title caught my attention. lolllll
    I went back to NC again.

    • @joonapietila2573
      @joonapietila2573 5 років тому

      Yeah bro. It's a little bit cringeworthy situation😂

  • @thetruefusion7874
    @thetruefusion7874 5 років тому +3

    What about my case where she just says Hey ,and then dissappears?

  • @AmberMcQuiston
    @AmberMcQuiston 4 роки тому +17

    Very poor advice. I agree with someone in the other comments. Do not ask them out. These are called Breadcrumbs. Respond the first time pleasantly and mirror their effort level. Then go back into NC. Ignore the next "Hey" text completely. Don't message them back until they contact you with something more meaningful like they've been thinking about you a lot, etc. Another coach suggested this and it makes way more sense.

    • @andrewhamilton2480
      @andrewhamilton2480 3 роки тому +8

      Just for the people reading this now, pls just listen to rory. Breadcrumbs can often times be that the ex is to nervous to blatantly say "hey ive been thinking about you a lot lately and really want to see you", not to mention saying that directly is ridiculously desperate.
      Breadcrumbs can be nothing, or they can be a mask for someone who really does care. How do you find out which it is? You ask to meet up.
      If they say no, then u know the message was empty and can move on. If they say yes, hurray! You got a result that wouldve otherwise been missed by taking Amber's advice.
      Gl everyone!

    • @chisomoffor6877
      @chisomoffor6877 2 роки тому

      You talking about the Theartoflove channel

  • @kashmirirose3733
    @kashmirirose3733 20 годин тому

    All I know is that she reared her head. We caught up, realized that we picked up where we left off, which is not a good thing. She disappeared, and I didn't chase. She'll be back. Like Damone from Fast Times, I put out the vibe and women seem to respond.

  • @JPFRANCHISE87
    @JPFRANCHISE87 3 роки тому +1

    What about when your ex reached out, agreed to a date, the date goes very well, and then you don’t hear from them at all for about a week now?? And no I haven’t reached out or chased.

  • @gregepps1669
    @gregepps1669 Рік тому

    Good morning,
    I really needed to see this video.
    My ex girlfriend friend and I have broken up for 18 months, and she has been in new relationship for over a year.
    However since March, my ex girlfriend and I have been texting and talking on the phone. Matter of fact she has reached out to me on Father's Day and 4th July. On one occasion she asked me, have I thought about her during the break up. She also agreed to meet me for coffee, but she postponed the coffee meet.
    As I mentioned she reached out to me on Father's Day and the 4th July. However my birthday was in July, but she didn't reach out. Matter of fact I haven't heard from her in over 2 weeks.
    I'm so over her!! I've blocked her!! She is so immature!!

  • @thebrandedone7714
    @thebrandedone7714 2 роки тому +1

    My ex reached out. However I don´t know if she was breadcumbing or If I screwed it up. She texted after 3 weeks of no contact asking how I was. She later asked If I already had anyone, and I said that I was busy and didn´t have time for meeting someone. As the conversation progressed I was trying to speak in a humorous way and she asked If I was making fun of her(?) and I said that I was just talking in a friendly humurous way. After a few text messages I sent an overly flirtatious text and she went cold. The next day she wasn´t responding. I`ve only seen your videos after she reached out so I thought I missed the chance to get her on a date, so I called her at night wondering if she wanted to catch up. She didn´t answer the call. The nest day she asked why I called and I said I wanted to know if she wanted to catch up. She said that due to exams right now she couldn´t. We kept talking and she said that she had been having more problems with her family and I said if she needed anything she could talk to me. She stopped responding after that. A few days later my birthday came up and she congratulated me. We started talking again, but although she was sweet the first few messages she went cold again. Her birthday came up 2 days later and I sent her a text wishing her happy birthday and she replied with "Thanks" so I liked her dm and left it at that. Was she breadcumbing me when she reached out or did I mess it up? Did I overpursue? And what should I do now? Go back to no contact?

  • @tayyabavance5982
    @tayyabavance5982 5 років тому +3

    You are awesome that is all❤️ plz do video on when someone blocked you I will highly appreciate!

  • @brandymelvillie7594
    @brandymelvillie7594 5 років тому +4

    could you cover the topic deeper of a long distance break up? love your videos already helped me a lot xx

  • @sallyscott7555
    @sallyscott7555 5 років тому +2

    Can you cover married men who pursue single women they were involved with before they got married?

  • @jeskahaley9616
    @jeskahaley9616 2 роки тому +1

    What if you don’t really want them back although you’ll always love them. You just want mutual kindness and respect? They’re so self centered. Leave me alone man

  • @anewman1976
    @anewman1976 5 років тому +1

    Looking forward to our chat later tonight for me the other side of the pond! :)

  • @TRESHONCURRY
    @TRESHONCURRY 2 роки тому +1

    My ex wanted to see me then canceled last minute why??

  • @pandurlolgg5780
    @pandurlolgg5780 5 років тому +3

    Hey Rory, can you do a video about "how to mindread" please?

  • @Zoglizzy
    @Zoglizzy 2 роки тому +1

    My ex reached out yesterday via phone after I had spoke with a mutual friend about our situation then she called the convo didn’t go as well but she still reached out but I ended the conversation and she hasn’t reached back out yet

    • @Digitalizedx
      @Digitalizedx 2 роки тому

      Same mine came over felt tension still..

  • @bleedingwords502
    @bleedingwords502 3 роки тому +2

    My ex reaches out once every month and disappears...it's been a year now what's that supposed to mean?

  • @ladydee4485
    @ladydee4485 5 років тому

    Thank you so very much, Coach Rory! I'm going through this very same issue at the moment and listening to your very insightful advice was all the encouragement I needed to stay strong & appreciate how far I've come. You are the best! ❤🙏🏻

  • @garpheo
    @garpheo 9 днів тому +1

    so should i reach out if they disappeared or continue my nocontact until they come back again??

  • @sammonsterenergy1982
    @sammonsterenergy1982 3 роки тому

    I had this..ex ended us as she wanted to focus on moving back to the uk and felt she couldn’t connect lately, unsure of future or feelings towards me..I said get in touch when you fee ready. 34days later she reached out..we chatted a bit about work, & how her plans for coming home is going. My last text ended I had a reminder of our cuddles earlier made me smile..maybe I should of suggested meeting up. I’ve heard nothing from her since..it’s been nearly 3 weeks..somewhat confused!

  • @ttfg480
    @ttfg480 4 роки тому +1

    She reached out after 90 days of NC... When I went to no contact first time, I told her to let me know if she ever change her mind, so when she reached out I had my hopes high. I didn't manage to set up a date, she just wanted her things back. I told her that we can meet up when she'll be free and I can take them with me, she refused and asked me to mall them to her. I did not, back to NC, over 40 days now... I'm not doing really good guys, I was starting to feel better before she reached out, now I'm back to this hell, it's like she broken up with me all over again.

    • @77BLAZER77
      @77BLAZER77 4 роки тому

      I hope you are doing well now brother, any update on your situation?

  • @kalenna6785
    @kalenna6785 4 роки тому +2

    I wouldnot want someone that I refused, it is just not for me. Once, the feeling's gone, its gone. Even he would have become the president of the U.S, if wouldnot make much of a different for me and he doesn't seem to get it, I don't let anyone walks over me,I have a lot of better things to do and more amazing people to get to know. This one have the habit of treating woman like a piece of crap and then the next day, would come back and put a little charm on, hope they will forget what he did, it is not the way it is to treat me.Guess that is why he is still around, cause every women already said no to him.He is all that left when others moved on and improve themselves, he will be in his mental prison forever and I am not interested in getting involved in the problem that is not mine.

  • @russberrypi5726
    @russberrypi5726 5 років тому +1

    When you get your senses back, you will see how half assed this kind of attempts to reach out are. Then itll annoy you so much. Better make it clear that half ass steps are not welcome. 😒

  • @Giovanni-01
    @Giovanni-01 3 роки тому +1

    That's why when they reach out ,if you reply, wait 2-3 days and from there always reply the next day , not the same day they respond to you. If the convo goes day just leave it on read ,and wait. That's what I did when my ex gf reached out last Saturday, she acc called but didn't leave a msg, I waited until Monday and just asked if she called?
    She responded on the Tuesday and said "ohhh, it must've been an accident sorry" yeh right , so when I replied I said "ofc it was lol". Then when she denied that she did it on purpose I waited until the next evening ( Wednesday just gone) "yh yh excuses lol" and she responded with laughing emoji's,and so I just left her on read . And she kept looking to see if I was online.
    I just laughed to myself ,ik this girl too well, ik she wanted to talk to me , during those couple of days of contact, I'd take a whole day to respond and she'd respond within minutes.
    4 days since we spoke ,so if she wants to talk then ,it's up to her. I'm not making the mistake of initiating.

  • @unKnown-zc8fe
    @unKnown-zc8fe 5 років тому

    Yeah my ex dumped her rebound. Admitted to me that she was with him because he was easy to walk away from. We were chatting here and there. Had a couple drinks one night and hooked up. A week later we booked up again. Then she said what were doing is making her depressed even more. She said I push things,and that if we were to ever to get back together she wants it to be for the right reasons.. not out of loneliness. I agreed, 2 weeks later she’s dating someone else now. I’m pretty fed up with things and keeping it short and about the kids if anything at all

  • @melodyluich7042
    @melodyluich7042 5 років тому +1

    This video was much needed!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @oppahadventures114
    @oppahadventures114 4 роки тому +1

    New subscriber here love this video . Thanks

  • @Sch1ll1
    @Sch1ll1 5 років тому +2

    How to behave when meeting your ex in person ?

  • @melissanewburn1937
    @melissanewburn1937 4 роки тому

    My ex left 3 mos. ago after a 2.4 year relationship. We were engaged to be married and had lived together the entire relationship. I implied NC after a week of chasing and it does work. However, we have been in and out of contact (sometimes he takes a day or two off before reaching out again). The issue is that we can’t meet up as he had no choice but to move out of state to stay with a friend, he unfortunately lost his job due to Covid 19. He says he misses me, just yesterday I was told how much he loves me. But he still needs to work on himself (feels less of a man by not being employed) and figure out what he wants. Either I will completely move on depending on how much longer he needs or I will wait. But it’s really hard knowing that being long distance right now we can’t move to the next step.

  • @ResidentOfTheAbyss
    @ResidentOfTheAbyss 3 роки тому

    My ex reached out after two months of breaking up with me by calling my phone, but I didn’t answer. She left no voicemail message either. I never called her back, went completely silent, and it’s been well over a year now since that happened, and still nothing from her.

  • @thatpoeticthug
    @thatpoeticthug 4 місяці тому

    She called me last night but only let the phone ring once.
    I didn't have time to pick up I haven't called her yet should I call back or wait for her to call me again?

  • @dia7777mond
    @dia7777mond 2 роки тому

    I love him but I don't want him anymore I am happy and have walked so far away can't afford to go back to the past.

  • @SorkeXL
    @SorkeXL 5 років тому

    Amazing video Rory!!

  • @emocentofficial3487
    @emocentofficial3487 4 роки тому

    I remember after break up I did NC and she reached out after 9 days but after few days of hot n cold Talkin when we were about to meet she disappeared. And I did the worst thing anyone can do is I got panic and kept calling her and it got worse and we stopped talking again. Hope this helps to someone

  • @rezkykamal1004
    @rezkykamal1004 5 років тому

    Thank you so much for the videooo rory!!!! I need this topic so much, i love you man, you're the best👍

  • @slyfly4829
    @slyfly4829 4 роки тому

    my ex asked to meet and talk , she even called when i wasnt home. i messaged her back and asked if she was okay. then she disappeared

  • @rainerneumeister5239
    @rainerneumeister5239 3 роки тому

    My ex has reached out several times. . But she has disappeared each time. ? She is in a relationship since we broke up 7 months ago. But says she's a mess and doesn't know what to do.

  • @khaleesio2513
    @khaleesio2513 5 років тому

    Cant wait for the video!

    • @khaleesio2513
      @khaleesio2513 4 роки тому

      @@carolperdro6739 thank you but I don't want him back! I met someone better!

  • @neon_one_neo3317
    @neon_one_neo3317 4 роки тому

    She tried to put me on ice in case my life ended up going well with this business dream I always had. Ik this because after she talked to her new guy she reached out and and all of a sudden seemed determined to make me a bestfriend, I knew the game already. I told her no and the feeling is mutual, we're just on good terms, u moved on and I moved on, but she didnt seem to listen so I just left it alone until she stopped talking and had to go, now all of a sudden shes available to "hanging out" 😒....yet still talks to the other guy

  • @mxsharkgang3246
    @mxsharkgang3246 3 роки тому

    This happened to me 2 weeks ago. I gave statements. I did it on purpose to see what he would do. Its definitely confusing

  • @santinogoring8860
    @santinogoring8860 5 років тому

    I needed this thanks so much my man Rory.

  • @halojimmy7
    @halojimmy7 5 років тому +1

    when my friend reach out to me she say "hey" it seems like she doesn't calls me Jimmy no more
    usually its just "hey"
    anyone has theory on this?

  • @Cfresh84
    @Cfresh84 5 років тому

    What if they called you once and you missed the call, but you called back and your still blocked?? Then they never called again

  • @evies_mommy_84
    @evies_mommy_84 4 роки тому +3

    I think this is my favorite video. My ex reached out about a month after he broke up with me. He texted me around 10:30 at night, with a "Hey". He asked how I am and told me he was thinking about me so he figured he'd reach out. However, the conversation pretty much went nowhere, as he never responded to my last comment. Now it's been almost another month and he hasn't reached out a second time. I'm not sure why but I really hope he contacts me again. He saw that I responded politely, he knows I still care, and I didn't mention the breakup at all. I did everything right. Now it's up to him to come get the prize he threw away.

    • @evies_mommy_84
      @evies_mommy_84 4 роки тому +1

      @@owmeow yes, five more times actually:
      1. Text me "hi" the night before his birthday and said he just wanted to let me know he still had some of my stuff (March)
      2. Text me to ask a question regarding care for his dog (he knows I know a lot about animals) (March)
      3. Text me to wish me a Happy Birthday even though I let his go by without saying it to him (May)
      4. Text me "hi" again and I didn't respond, to which he text me again two days later to tell me it was fine if I didn't want to talk to him anymore, but that I was in his thoughts (August)
      5. Text me "hi" AGAIN and proceeded to ask me if I wanted to hang out, be "friends", and dangled the possibly of us becoming "something more" again in the future. (August)
      Also, he finally told me he missed me. It only took him 8 f*cking months.

    • @evies_mommy_84
      @evies_mommy_84 4 роки тому

      @@owmeow I don't know you but I can tell you this: you don't deserve to be cheated on. No one does. You deserve better, and anyone seems like they'd be better for you than him. Then again, I can't just say such cliche things when I know damn well I deserve better, too. I'm not one of these powerful no-dick-is-worth-this, take-no-shit girls...I'm an overemotional mess and as much as I'd love to tell him what a fucking depression spiral he sent me down, I don't want to give him the satisfaction. His punishment was the removal of my love from his life. I doubt any girl ever cared for him as much as I did...but it sounds like you know exactly how that feels.

    • @evies_mommy_84
      @evies_mommy_84 4 роки тому

      @@owmeow maybe you owe yourself the gift of telling him to fuck off. Let him be an asshole and a dick to all those other girls. He can be their problem. Someone somewhere is a lot more worthy of your love. Even if he did say he wanted more than just phone sex conversations with you, wouldn't you just always be paranoid that he's doing shit on the side again? That's no way for you to live, either. But again, I can't give advice and then not take my own. I think the phrase "I did EVERYTHING for him!" sounds like something all discarded girlfriends say, but for some, it's actually true. I gave over 100% and I showed him that I'd help him, care for him, love him and never give up and exit. I went through some tough shit for him and I just want him to regret what he did. I think he does. But I have no clue what to do anyway. I feel like my choices are always wrong. But I really hope you find someone who appreciates your love and all you have to offer. Someone who you don't always have to wonder about, who they're talking to or what they're doing. We can't help who we love but I wish it was that simple.

    • @evies_mommy_84
      @evies_mommy_84 4 роки тому

      @@owmeow you're welcome and you're right...you most certainly don't deserve to feel that way. To sum it up? F*CK HIM!

  • @apoloWND
    @apoloWND 5 років тому

    the "strike while the iron is hot" or whatever asking to meet up right away when they reach out... applies when she's still in a rebound?

  • @micallll100
    @micallll100 5 років тому +3

    They have more options

  • @michellel245
    @michellel245 5 років тому +1

    This is what happened in my relationship of 6 yrs. he left me two months ago and the last month i stopped contacting him then he would reach out until i told him why is he calling me he left me. Havent heard from him its been a month i wonder if hell reach out

  • @gamingandrefashionshipadvi6132
    @gamingandrefashionshipadvi6132 3 роки тому

    I need to build the mentality of not getting them back, I’ve ended it with the fear of her breaking my heart it was a matter of time(monkey branching) ☺️, I’ve learned that w/out the anxiety during no contact I’ve been doing my best

  • @nathantibble2801
    @nathantibble2801 9 місяців тому

    So, my ex and I have been slowly reconnecting. I sent one of her tops back and used it as an excuse to message her. She messaged me to let me know it had arrived, so we had a short conversation, and she seemed engaged; she didn't have to say half of what she did. However, I changed the subject to keep it going, informing her that I started a new job today. She read it but didn't reply.
    Did she freak out, or is she worried that I'm trying to impress her? I'm assuming I should wait a few days before trying again?

  • @Mitsu5032
    @Mitsu5032 5 років тому +1

    So i sent my ex a text a few days ago and never got a response until 2 days ago. What does that mean? I thought she blocked me but i guess not

  • @77BLAZER77
    @77BLAZER77 4 роки тому

    Please Rory can you go into details of what happens after that? My situation she reached out twice during no contact after 3 months asked random stuff and family and then the convo died. I can't sit and wait for the next reach out again can u specify what can be done from outside after they reach out indirectly? Thanks alot

  • @QBlond84
    @QBlond84 5 років тому +1

    Thanks for your video, Can you make video about women you shouldn't date??

    • @QBlond84
      @QBlond84 5 років тому

      @@azazel3944 hahhahha, you can't tell they are lik so from the beginning bro

  • @proleeethax
    @proleeethax 5 років тому +2

    My ex reached out asking how I was. I said I was doing well and she proceeded to tell me she misses me. She then asked in in a couple weeks we could go for a walk and talk. I said sure sounds good. Then after a week and a half goes by she blocked me on everything... We were together for 2 years, I did not do anything during no contact to push her in this direction and I dealt with the breakup very well. I am so confused.... I feel that this was just mean and not a nice way to treat someone.

  • @aimeej7838
    @aimeej7838 5 років тому +1

    Gut feeling he’ll come back ? Please do a video I have a gut feelings and it’s been here for a while

  • @AC-xq6lf
    @AC-xq6lf 4 роки тому

    So do you go back into No Contact after they reach out (and disappear)? My ex reached out after a month of NC and was super nice. We chatted for a bit and he asked me out for coffee/drink. Then I didn't hear from him again. :(

  • @CirculoPro
    @CirculoPro 5 років тому

    He reached out because he needs work. He's dating someone else and asked me if I can get gigs for him. I felt terrible..used..angry. but..I was very polite, didn't mention anything let's see where it goes.

  • @lifeofcj6550
    @lifeofcj6550 4 роки тому

    My ex came back after one month of her rebound failing than she reached out to me I came to her house to see what she had to say she said she missed me and didn’t like not talking so than I would start coming to her house to stay the night than one week in she gets cold than blocks me yep she back with the rebound like I figured...we were together for three years.

  • @maurice970
    @maurice970 4 роки тому

    she send me "hey" after 33 days. I replied the next day with "hey" while she was online on fb she didn't open the convo but started to share things on her page and adding stories... wtf is her problem