A couple questions for you: - Do you notice peer pressure to keep up with social media? - If so, are there kids you teach who are not on social media, and are they generally in the same friend group?
Her police officer father was ok with a strange man purchasing pics of his underage daughter??!! As a dad of a young girl, that is beyond comprehension to me
The fact the parents sold photos of their underage child to people they don't know, actually, anyone at all for that matter is disgusting. They're teaching her that her beauty is for sale at a young age, incredibly damaging.
What the hell is happening with influencers now. This explosion of parasocial, transactional relationships with fans is harmful enough, but a 15 year old encouraged by her parents…
@@lanceanthony198 it's frightening because in the interview with her parents she basically says "your clout or # of followers on social media is everything" and her parents don't disagree. Meaning not only are they teaching her, that her looks mean money, that it's OK to view your status on social media as your self worth. That appalled me, no reassuring her that she's more than her online following count or anything. But then again, just look on here under comments, kids thanking people for liking their posts, or "1k likes omg mom I'm famous!!". These young kids are being trained to get dopamine from likes/follows on platforms, it's so sad to me. Future generations who view their appearance as the #1 most important quality & think the number of followers/likes makes them better than others. I'm 32, and I remember being 14 with my friends posting our photos on hotornot and refreshing the page and checking daily to see our "rating" and knowing how much that # impacted our self image was insane. Luckily we had parents who taught us that our appearance wasn't the most important thing in life.
@@drbqqq1433 she wasn't selling publicly available photos, she was selling personal photos. The parents claim it was only face shots but still was photos taken only for the person paying. And she's 15, only a scummy parent would sell photos of their kids to people, they have no idea what kind of people are buying these. Hardly any 15yr old boys are going to have funds to buy photos, they know damn well it was older men buying them.
Agree with you that the parents are trash and in my view the father was like a pimp. I'm also very turned off the video maker's analysis which mostly gives the father and his daughter a pass for almost all their actions
It's pure cancer. Practically no real content conveyed in contrast to UA-cam. Mostly lip syncing and dancing. If teens get their world view and ideas from other teens of course there are pathological trends forming especially in regards to self harm etc. Read about the rising cases of pseudo tourette syndrome.
Parents allowing the stalker to buy pictures probably made the stalker feel like he is "approved" by her parents. I get that the money might be tempting, but the girl is underage and it's already an awful idea to let minors have significant online presence considering how many creeps use the internet for nefarious purposes. You don't want to open that door because there is no telling what creepy stranger will begin to feel too comfortable.
Especially when she is only 15! I looked her up. One her most recent TikToks is her in a crop top and shots jamming to a hip hop song that says something about having sex all night! 🤦♂️
And they didn't need that $$!!!! It's not like they were doing it in an extreme situation because they desperately needed money (not that that would justify it) they just did it for more money. GREED. They got greedy and caught up in the thrill of making money hand over fist. It's disgusting.
@@jessisblessed6689 Oh yes the thrill of a few hundred dollars. Yes you are disgusted that noone wanted to pay for your pictures. I guess the stalkers parents are the model citizens. If I raised a kid that said let me travel hundreds of miles with a shotgun to a girls house, I know I did my best.
Not everybody would be so quick to shoot a teenager. Even as a former cop, he will carry that night with him for the rest of his life. Pulling the trigger on another human being is much easier said than done.
@@richardhart9204 Exactly. I think that both are critical. Here in Australia there isn't the same stand your ground laws as in the US which has led to many Australian citizens being charged with everything from reckless wounding to manslaughter for defending themselves and/or their property.
@@richardhart9204 She was selling photos of her face. I think the raciest one was from décolletage, up. Would this have been different if she were a portrait model remunerated for her work? But yeah, the freedom to use a (highly suspect Chinese) application necessarily should’ve resulted in retaliation of violence towards her in her domicile (edit; sarcasm). The man had every right to end the intruder; the boy played a stupid game and won a stupid prize 🤷♂️
Are we not gonna talk about why she has so many views on her videos ? Because people like seeing a 14 year old girl dance around in reveling cloths. Idk why no one talks about this ?
It's gross, from our perspective - but remember, as Dr. G stated, the vast majority of TikTok users are kids. This stalker guy was 18, and being a socially awkward loner, probably only had the mind of someone much younger.
Any minor who has the consent of their parents to sell photos of themselves to strangers online needs much more proactive parents. That said, stalking is a dangerous crime that law enforcement needs to take much more seriously.
@@misseselise3864 accepting money and directly contacting someone who is stalking your MINOR daughter only causes them to feel more emboldened to reach out/push boundaries. I can't help but think that if they never sold the photos, he never would have felt like he had a close enough bond with her to ask for explicit content, never would have sent hundreds of dollars, and while he probably still would have made some sort of contact/attempt to harm her or someone else, i bet it wouldnt have been with a gun and it wouldnt have been with intent to kill. They opened up a door and shut it in his face, hes a violent psychopath with an obsession for little girls, they should have protected their daughter before he almost killed her.
@@misseselise3864oh my God do you not understand that when you start giving an obsessed person what they want they do not become less obsessed nor do they become less dangerous.
Omg - her parents allowed her to sell pictures of herself? That’s really bizarre. I’ve never heard of anything like that. Not trying to victim blame. Sounds like she was also a victim of her parents.
Victim blaming is a morally idiotic concept. It's perfectly appropriate to blame someone (victim or otherwise) for things they have genuinely done wrong.
@@natalielawyerchick We all want to act like these teenage girls are complete idiots and Inherently naïve. However I may be in my early 40s but I remember vividly being a teenage girl! Many are a lot smarter than you think. They know there’s value in their looks and they know how to manipulate! Teenage girls probably lie more than married men do!
@@eadweard. I agree. Victim-blaming has morphed into one of the more cynical rhetorical tactics. It's entirely possible to want to hold a criminal accountable for their crimes while also questioning the wisdom and choices of a victim. If I walk down a dark alley in a bad neighborhood in the middle of the night and get mugged you can still want to perpetrator caught and argue my decision was a bad one.
What kind of parents are these to allow this?! I absolutely agree that it was self defense, but selling your daughter’s photos??? Wtf? Great analysis Dr Grande, as always!
All parties including Eric would have been aware that those photos were not worth $300. Eric believed he was entitled to additional access to Ava and that it was his right. He likely became enraged when he was basically told to f--off. Ava’s parents should have known this whole senecio was creepy at best and dangerous at worst
@@Koozomec it may very well be but it's not regulated nor is it illegal, today. It's time guidelines & legal definitions were put into place. Each state needs a call to action for children who are working in the public eye. You may be to young to remember but this has already happened with the actress that portrayed the older sister in the Poltergeist movie franchise & had a TV show with Paw Dawber called "My Sister Sam". That young woman had a stalker very similar to this story. She was gunned down & killed at her front door.
@@Kimberly-Fredrick I'm 41 :) i never had heard about this actress but thank you for your thougthfull comment. J Lennon was killed by a stalker and other celebrities (or even anonymous individuals) suffers from this disturbing behaviour. The parents have put her in harm's way by exploiting this guy unhealthy obsession. If they had reported him he would have eventually been able to seek help (who knows ?). They did nothing "illegal" but they are very "unethical" in my opinion.
They might be if they were signed prints. A digital download no, but if she signed them & mailed them, then yeah. ( still doesn't give the creep the right to think he was special to her. He paid for them. Special people would have been gifted them for free. I don't wanna give a stalker an out here. lol)
Allowing the daughter to sell her photos was bad enough, but letting her accept additional money-hundreds!-via Venmo was a terrible idea. That amount of money could be considered an “investment” and could suggest future interactions to an obsessive fan. There’s no way this situation could have ended well. I don’t know if it’s worth it for the father to consider killing the occasional stalker in order to keep his kid’s TikTok career going.
People will sell tier souls (or their child's soul) for money in a heartbeat; Kris Jenner leveraged her daughter's sex tape into a literally business empire. Let that sink in
I wonder about the stage parents aspect of this analysis. You mentioned that Ava’s parents were surprised about how much money she was able to make on TikTok. Is there a typical personality profile that would explain the parents’ behavior? They put their daughter’s life at risk selling pictures to a stalker.
Yes, I was thinking the same thing. I would never give my kids full access to the internet. You have to watch them, like a hawk. The parents seem odd to me. They knew this guy was stalking her, and let him BUY photos? Something isn't right with them. As a former police officer, he knows what a stalker is like. Terrible parenting, IMO. Great comment, btw. ❤
Hate to tell you, but no they did not put their daughters life at risk. The lunatic that showed up with a shotgun, put her life at risk, as well as their own.
@@jhoughjr1 while i agree that they did not directly put her life at risk, they still basically pimped out their daughter and seem to accept the higher risk of getting stalked for a handful of money
It is strange that the parents allowed this at all while these photos dont seem overtly sexual some are very suggestive. I dont see how a parent thinks this is appropriate especially one that worked in law enforcement and dealt with pedos and perverts. It just doesnt sit right and to think what would have been done to his daughter if the shotgun had been used properly. Yet they still encourage a 15 year old to make money with her appearance using the same site that lead to this.
Why would any sensible parent allow their very young children to be on any platform like that?? She's far too young to how high the risk may be, but the parents.... As always, such an interesting video, Dr. Grande, loved your final thoughts also!
I think there's a difference between watching videos on tik tok, recording videos for tik tok like to your favorite song or quote or actually making money off of that. I asume tik tok has a way to make your account "not public" and i don't think there 's an issue if kids are singing along to their favorite song in front of a camera, the issue lies within a public profile filled with videos and pictures of a minor that naturally are going to attract some creeps and instead of monitoring the interactions and blocking these creeps as one should and making sure personal info remains private(like their adress ffs), they proceeded to milk the money machine regardless of the risk associated with being famous.
This is a way to generous reading to me. Her parents care about the money she’s making and not much else. I can’t think of a sane parent who would sell pictures of their minor daughter to a strange man. And then when said strange man breaks into their home with a gun still decides that their daughter should continue her social media account. Their putting money before their daughters safety
Yup! They're obviously milking her fame for money. Just imagine all the gross men and boys looking at her photos and videos. And they seem ok with that. So they shouldn't be surprised if a number of these ppl turn out to be creeps, stalkers and psychopaths.
@@pythondrink autistically so. Look around. Parents are lazier and offloading responsibilities at pace with an increase in these types of things. I can also tell you that parent influence their kids not by what they say, but by what they do.
Do these parents have any control of their child's life? Letting your daughter dance around in a sports bra for the entertainment of young men is a little gross.
In fact they do not. The same commenters on here would bash the parents as trying to control their daughter if they did the opposite. The culture promotes girls to act like that
@@willnill7946 Agree culture promotes attractive women/girls 'promoting' their beauty like that, but also agree with Diann T that it's different people saying the two things. Not everyone is a woke lib fem.
When a kid this young is this involved in social media, I think the identity is formed by the response he/she gets on social media. Adoration and fame can lead to narcissism; notoriety and hatred can lead to self-disgust-both poor for the development of a happy and healthy person. I think kids have a false sense of security when there’s a screen between them and other people. When there’s no longer a screen, things get real and that’s what happened here in this case. Your analysis was very thoughtful, Dr. G. I appreciate your balanced view on placing responsibility on the right person while using the parents’ lack of insight to caution others. Really well done! ❤️
I was groomed and stalked at 14, and the stalking went on for over 2 decades. Cops here take far too long to respond in emergencies, hence I bought a gun that I'm comfortable with and fully trained to use. And if the need arises, I will not hesitate to defend myself and/or my family with lethal force, if need be. It's vital to know how to protect yourself and to be willing to do so. If you hesitate, that's when your weapon gets wrenched from your hands and used against you. And you don't have to be a celebrity to have someone inappropriately fixate on you, in often dangerous ways.
The gas station analogy was spot on. You would think a former cop would be more protective over a daughter in the “public eye”. Perhaps the her potential future fame blinded them all a little bit in this scenario.
@@Mama_Bear524 wouldn’t be shocked if he retired because of all the income his daughter’s bringing in…..which might be why they’re keeping her on TikTok after all this 🤦♂️
American cops are not known for their intelligence or higher education or any other good qualities the police force in the usa is basicly a secondhand dump drain after the first drain called the military a dumping ground for low income low class dumb uneducated people spit out and left behind by their own society brainwashed or gaslighted in to slavery to keep the rest of the people free 😂😂😂😂 jeez
Once they found her “friends” were selling information about her they should have confronted them. Secondly, they should have cut all contact with that person and never accepted any money from him. Some people believe giving money or gifts entitles them to more than the recipient believes is acceptable.
seem to me like: lol....lets take this sucker for a ride (2 photos for $300 is bullshit) and it kinda didnt turn out like they expected. they probably assumed he would just piss off after wasting his money.
These parents were willing to make money selling photographs of their underage daughter to a potential stalker. Child Protective Services needs to investigate.
Tik Tok is where brain cells go to die. I had a similar problem with Madonna, although she was in love with me and wrote a few songs about me, it was infuriating that she never returned my calls or letters. 😢
The parents legitimized this “relationship” by ALLOWING PHOTOS OF THEIR MINOR DAUGHTER TO BE SOLD!! Did they think Eric would just frame the photos of their daughter?
Very interesting video, Dr. Grande. I think the phenomenon of social media is something we need to pay attention to but I don't think we realize all the reasons why or how we need to be vigilant. It's very uncharted territory, and coming from a mom of 21 and 17 year olds, it's a learning curve for sure.Thank you for another stellar and thought provoking talk.
I think we are going to be the experiment for the rest of the world to see. My boy is almost 2 and the way things stand now I dont want him to have any access to social media at all till he is out of high school. The issue is that a majority of parents wont do the same so he has to grow with kids that are under that spell. All the while he might feel as tho he is missing out on something vital and that may drive him to it in a worse way.
@@novac1990 @Suttree I thought that I would do the same but it didn't work that way. I have friends who would routinely go through their kids' phones every night, checking every interaction. But there are apps we don't know about, the kids will always be a step ahead of us. I know it's hard to feel it right now with a toddler, but there will come a time when you have to just believe in what you've taught your kids and trust them.
I really can't imagine how many narcissistic young adults we're gonna have in 5 9r 10 years when all of these of these kids who grew up on these self centered social media platforms
probably about as many as we do now. boomers and gen x are two of the most narcissistic and entitled generations alive so I cant see future generations being too far off.
@@user-sl5td9uh7q You err in thinking that anyone in those generations will come close to wielding any semblance of power the way we understood it before the 2020s; once AI starts being legislated favorably- and once its capacities allow for its mass application worldwide on government-scale- most millennials and zoomers will be hyper-managed serial numbers with varying degrees of pay-grade and resource allotment based on their utility and compliance.
She didn’t want her friends making money off her so she cut ties with them but she sure as hell wanted the money herself so instead of reporting this psycho stalker to the police, she decided to negotiate with the crazy and sell her pictures to him directly. You don’t make deals with your stalkers, at least her father should have known the potential dangers of it. It’s like adding fuel to the fire. Stalkers are extremely entitled people. If you give them your finger, they will try to grab your hand. What good could have come from dangling a carrot in front of an obsessed stalker? The obsession only grew when she started dealing with him directly and sold him her photos. The parents should have known better,smh.
No no no! We are NOT blaming the minor here. Not even the slightest bit. This started when she was 13-14 years old. A literally tween/teen. A small idiot. She is not developed enough to even know all the warning signs. I look back at decisions I made at that age and realize that I was one bad decision from a lot of bad situations. This lies squarely on the parents. Their greed and consent to these practices put their daughter and themselves in danger. At no point in this story is it saying that this girl was doing anything behind her parents back. And she cut ties with the classmates selling her information. I think she made the best decisions she could and her parents, whom should've had the brain capacity to cut this to the quick right away, made her think this was okay and thus have traumatized her for life. They have made her aware of the most horrible aspects of the world before she got the chance to see it organically. They have failed their child and do not deserve her, especially since they haven't learned their lesson and still allow her on social media.
@@MiyaMam948 Agree but I wouldn't call young people idiots...they literally have not had the same life experience (in most cases) as those older than them and do not have the capacity to think about decisions and consequences equally (due to frontal lobe development as well as lack of experiences). In fact, the idea that young people are self-obsessed morons is probably why there's such a huge lack of inter-generational understanding. Once we pass those periods in our lives, we're happy to treat all with disgust who are going through the SAME phases and periods in their lives as we did and sometimes doing the same things.
Report him to the police for what beyond him threatening to shoot her door down? Before he threatened to shoot them, he wasn't breaking any laws. He was still online stalking, but he wasn't breaking any laws.
Dr. Grande said the family moved from New Jersey to Naples, FL, and that dad was a retired police officer. He failed to mention that dad's nickname at work was Barney Fife and that he took it as a compliment.
Call me old-fashioned, but my daughter would be removed from all social media. She is probably supporting her family with the money she brings into the household. I do believe the shooting was justified.
LOL yeah you would think that, but teens have a way of keeping their parents in the dark historically. Its quite hard to keep tech away from teens if they want it bad enough. A friend went a similar issue with step children. For all his attempts ar control, he's now divorced and they are doing what they want anyway.
How are father can let his 15-year-old child sell pictures of herself is beyond me I don’t care how much money she’s bringing in this is the consequence of selling your photos to men it’s disgusting
My daughter is 12, and shes just asked me if she can have a tiktok account. Im going to have her watch this video with me before even contemplating it. Thanks Dr Grande!
There is so much wrong about this. She was 15. 15!!!! Why are her parents letting her correspond with an 18 year old man? Why would they let her sell her pictures to this guy? The only thing that makes sense is that her father took the guy down.
I have difficulty with this; people who are underage, having never worked at achieving anything tangible, not ever really working, or finding true artistic expression beyond the odd confines of the tech. Then the idea that this underaged person was supported by her parents; this only supports the implication then that none of these people really understood what plane of "reality" they were dealing with. In all this is just a horrific modern expression of the possible incapacity of humanity to deal with teenage hormonal response to stimuli which feeds a desire which is so easily accessed via the tech such as in this case. The question then becomes, are we as human beings really able to deal with the "social networks" as defined by high tech? Perhaps these are more detrimental than advantageous as described by the providers of these networks. I could live without UA-cam. I could perhaps be better off not even paying attention to this. What is one's humanity, what are the lines that define who one is?
I think you are asking the right questions. I think "Bret Weinstien" said it best when he said "We are living in a era of hyper novelty with little ability to understand and adapt to its effects". I think of certain chapters in human history and always thought the era of grand mistakes like "Nazi Germany" and "Communist Russia". I wonder of those people new they were living In the most pivotal lessons for future generations and now I wonder if here in this place and time we are begining to touch that threshold ourselves.
Have you ever considered doing a video on the ABBA stalker who moved to Sweden, and ended up in a two year relationship with the target of his affections? It's one of those stories that is just too weird to be made up.
I remember when there was a Stalking craze in the 90's, Sharon Stone was asked what she would do if a stalker came into her home. She replied "I was raised on a farm with guns and I am a crack shot. I sleep with a gun under my pillow and he would be dead before he hit the floor".
Dr Grande your precise and insightful assessment is very much appreciated.....I see your overarching opinion is that the parents were culpable in this situation and was avoidable. A minor should not be selling images of themselves in the public forum.....and any parent endorsing this for the mere reason of "earning money" is not justifiable.
Couldn't help but think that this case had a common theme for a thriller/suspense movie. On a serious note, I think letting minors get some sort of fame on the internet, should be illegal. The world is full of danger and crazy's.
But by that logic why let minors get fame through any other medium? And how do you even prevent that? Like the only way to prevent a minor becoming famous would be to prevent them from being on the internet at all. And then what happens when they turn 18? Now they have the ability to use and become famous on the internet but with none of the training to properly manage that fame.
@@joelman1989 idk bro i'm not an expert i just say what I think in the most intellectual way i can just to sound like I know what I'm talking about when i actually dont get baited bruh LMAO
@@joelman1989 I dont think many children at all have the capacity to handle the amount of attention and scrutiny that comes with being famous all the while they are still in development. The amount of kid actors who either overdosed or are a basket case now that there older is evidence enough.
*Social media is social cancer.* It was just a matter of time. There's no sanity requirement on the internet & it shouldn’t be presumed you’re dealing with sanity. This places the responsibility on Ava for enabling his stalking by offering photos in exchange for money & the parents for not seeing the situation for what it was. Eric is obviously responsible for his actions, but as Benjamin Franklin said “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”
That was another excellent analysis, and I thank you for your expertise. His life story had a sad ending but the story in general had a happy ending. I'm always happy when the criminal is stopped or killed and the victim is saved. Better a guilty one dies then a innocent one.
Great psychology of stalkers explained. I also always love your rounding up humor and final thoughts, always a satisfying end. I hope to be a great psychology student someday soon.
It’s amazing how our society has devolved to the level where a child of this age being on social media is “normal”. Nothing good will come out of this!
Thank you Dr. Grande for this analysis. I don't know anything about Tick-tock's trends nor follow "influencers", perhaps because I'm old enough or just because I was never someone to be "influenced" by someone who didn't have certain talent that could actually "influence" me. I think we all could agree that the shooting of the stalker was in self defense. But the greater and deeper issues are the ones leading to the shooting. Greed is, in my opinion, what let this parents allow her 13 year old daughter to have presence on social media and "manage her career" selling her photos to adult men. That disgust me. I think if a child has talent on a certain area, it's good to support them, they could have taken her to dance lessons or model classes, whatever she wanted at that time, or allowed her to have her account on social media, but monitoring as they should, she was just a girl. The parents (or at least the father) took advantage of her daughter's popularity for profit. This put her in terrible danger. And her so-called "friends", awful too. I think this girl probably will struggle with some sort of mental health issue as an adult if she keeps it up like with all this social media pseudo-celebrity. I've read about a phenomenon in South Korea of extreme fans of pop bands, a mixture of stalkers and self made paparazzis, called "Sasaeng". Many of them are young females. It would be great if you could analyze this phenomenon if you had the time.
This was an excellent analysis Of just have Vulnerable a 15 year old TickTock star is. Just an excellent show Dr. Grande and thank you for presenting it.
You can have a social media presence and make money without being a histrionic hussy. Good god! The father would have been more heroic if he had the balls to put a stop to his jailbait daughter's outrageously suggestive behavior. Imagine how much worse it would have been if he wasn't home?
I suspect there will be much more collateral damage as we all navigate the techno razors edge we are riding at speed. If you ever stop doing true crime Dr. Grande you could do sleep therapy audio with your steady, calming voice.
Thank you so much for not victim blaming. I really appreciate that you don’t blame a 13 year old girl for being naïve and recognize that the person responsible is the stalker, not the victim even when she made a mistake. It is important to only hold someone responsible for their own actions, not the actions of others toward them.
totally not the guy who showed up with a shotgun. Not his fault at all. Totally the girls parents fault. Not his or his parents fault at all.Had he been 17 and 364 days, well his parents would be responsible, but the next day, what parents, he's an adult!
I was reading about the different delusional disorders just a couple of days ago and there was one about a person who becomes obsessed with a celebrity- Erotomanic disorder. Sounds like maybe Eric was experiencing that?
The offender himself was a child. His parents should have been more involved in his life to have recognised something was amiss and taken care of him giving him the right kind of support.
A lot of parents have little idea what interactions happen on the internet. Many years ago, I wouldn't have known but for my ten year old son saying "Hee hee hee, I saw some naked girls when I googled 'sex'..." So I did the same and "Ahhh yuk. How do we go about blocking stuff, husband?"
It's weird to me that so much of the focus is on the idiotic parents and the girl. What about her poor brother? He's trapped in a pretty disturbing and unhealthy environment until he can move out.
I wouldn’t want a daughter to be on TikTok as a young teenager ( or any time, actually). I believe if I were her I’d stay off social media. That was a horrible incident.
Ava's father a retired police officer (income unknown or any at all?) and her mother (employment unknown) and 3 children in house. I certainly hope they aren't supporting the entire household using Ava's TIK TOK and other social media accounts earnings. 😬 Yikes.
I don't get how her schoolmates and "friends" just sold her out to that nutcase and thought that was a-okay - in this day & age where everyone has heard of crazy stalkers, how could they think that was a safe thing to do?
I've been a teacher for thirty years. Keep your kids off social media. Period. It's horrible for their mental health.
It’s not much better for full grown adults either.
A couple questions for you:
- Do you notice peer pressure to keep up with social media?
- If so, are there kids you teach who are not on social media, and are they generally in the same friend group?
Yes, and this disturbed young man could still be alive and receive the right therapy! One life lost, needlessly.
Amen to that
It's bad for adults imagine what it's doing to kids.
Her police officer father was ok with a strange man purchasing pics of his underage daughter??!! As a dad of a young girl, that is beyond comprehension to me
Child exploitation in my eyes.
My brother would have beat the hell out of him. Maybe my father would have, too! She was only 14!!
EXACTLY. My husband and I couldn’t get over that last night. 🥺 I don’t care if she’s dressed in a sweater and snow pants..protect your children!
@@Michele-bm1zu Definitely agree with you. 👍
Because $$$
The fact the parents sold photos of their underage child to people they don't know, actually, anyone at all for that matter is disgusting. They're teaching her that her beauty is for sale at a young age, incredibly damaging.
What the hell is happening with influencers now. This explosion of parasocial, transactional relationships with fans is harmful enough, but a 15 year old encouraged by her parents…
agree and well said
@@lanceanthony198 it's frightening because in the interview with her parents she basically says "your clout or # of followers on social media is everything" and her parents don't disagree. Meaning not only are they teaching her, that her looks mean money, that it's OK to view your status on social media as your self worth. That appalled me, no reassuring her that she's more than her online following count or anything. But then again, just look on here under comments, kids thanking people for liking their posts, or "1k likes omg mom I'm famous!!". These young kids are being trained to get dopamine from likes/follows on platforms, it's so sad to me. Future generations who view their appearance as the #1 most important quality & think the number of followers/likes makes them better than others. I'm 32, and I remember being 14 with my friends posting our photos on hotornot and refreshing the page and checking daily to see our "rating" and knowing how much that # impacted our self image was insane. Luckily we had parents who taught us that our appearance wasn't the most important thing in life.
@@drbqqq1433 she wasn't selling publicly available photos, she was selling personal photos. The parents claim it was only face shots but still was photos taken only for the person paying. And she's 15, only a scummy parent would sell photos of their kids to people, they have no idea what kind of people are buying these. Hardly any 15yr old boys are going to have funds to buy photos, they know damn well it was older men buying them.
Agree with you that the parents are trash and in my view the father was like a pimp. I'm also very turned off the video maker's analysis which mostly gives the father and his daughter a pass for almost all their actions
I immediately cracked up when you said "TikTok." I didn't realize two syllables could be so full of disgust.
He says it that way every time, stressing both syllables. Agreed that it's hilarious.
HAAHA I was just about to comment on this
It's pure cancer. Practically no real content conveyed in contrast to UA-cam. Mostly lip syncing and dancing. If teens get their world view and ideas from other teens of course there are pathological trends forming especially in regards to self harm etc. Read about the rising cases of pseudo tourette syndrome.
Agree
Its high time that these platforms be closed for good
Parents allowing the stalker to buy pictures probably made the stalker feel like he is "approved" by her parents. I get that the money might be tempting, but the girl is underage and it's already an awful idea to let minors have significant online presence considering how many creeps use the internet for nefarious purposes. You don't want to open that door because there is no telling what creepy stranger will begin to feel too comfortable.
Especially when she is only 15! I looked her up. One her most recent TikToks is her in a crop top and shots jamming to a hip hop song that says something about having sex all night! 🤦♂️
@@The_Red_Pill__ Hate to tell you, but this is nothing new.
Yeah idk how creeps every bothered anybody before the internet.
And they didn't need that $$!!!! It's not like they were doing it in an extreme situation because they desperately needed money (not that that would justify it) they just did it for more money. GREED. They got greedy and caught up in the thrill of making money hand over fist. It's disgusting.
@@jessisblessed6689 Oh yes the thrill of a few hundred dollars. Yes you are disgusted that noone wanted to pay for your pictures.
I guess the stalkers parents are the model citizens. If I raised a kid that said let me travel hundreds of miles with a shotgun to a girls house, I know I did my best.
Thank you for bringing a calming presence for the nurses on third shift this Saturday morning in North Carolina! You are awesome, Doc.
I'm in Texas and it's scout 1:30am. Dr Grande will probably be the last video for me as it's bed time
Heckyea nurses in NC ❤️
Thanks for your service, all of you!!
@pado joe biden oh god.
@pado joe biden I'll bet you're a real winner
The retired police officer father should have known better than anyone about the dangers of social media.
*cough cough Good Money!
He's a cop. He doesn't know actually anything about crime. That's one of the biggest misconceptions about police.
@@sorzin2289 exactly. And they aren’t bright. Does anyone know why he’s a former cop? Did he get fired? Because he’s not retirement age.
@okaythen Yes!
When someone enters your home with intent to harm, you have the *RIGHT and RESPONSIBILITY* to protect yourself and your family!
Her parents had the right and responsibility to prevent their underage daughter from selling (I'm being polite) herself on social media.
Not everybody would be so quick to shoot a teenager. Even as a former cop, he will carry that night with him for the rest of his life. Pulling the trigger on another human being is much easier said than done.
@@richardhart9204 Exactly. I think that both are critical. Here in Australia there isn't the same stand your ground laws as in the US which has led to many Australian citizens being charged with everything from reckless wounding to manslaughter for defending themselves and/or their property.
@@richardhart9204
She was selling photos of her face. I think the raciest one was from décolletage, up. Would this have been different if she were a portrait model remunerated for her work?
But yeah, the freedom to use a (highly suspect Chinese) application necessarily should’ve resulted in retaliation of violence towards her in her domicile (edit; sarcasm). The man had every right to end the intruder; the boy played a stupid game and won a stupid prize 🤷♂️
even if it is a pimps house whose daughter is his $$$ ho
Are we not gonna talk about why she has so many views on her videos ? Because people like seeing a 14 year old girl dance around in reveling cloths. Idk why no one talks about this ?
pretty gross
That’s pretty disturbing.
It's gross, from our perspective - but remember, as Dr. G stated, the vast majority of TikTok users are kids. This stalker guy was 18, and being a socially awkward loner, probably only had the mind of someone much younger.
Dad challege podcast on UA-cam has been talking about this stuff on his channel. He actually predicted this exact scenario!
@@globes179 most of her audience aren’t kids. And 18 isn’t a kid.
Any minor who has the consent of their parents to sell photos of themselves to strangers online needs much more proactive parents. That said, stalking is a dangerous crime that law enforcement needs to take much more seriously.
they were photos of her face. what’s wrong with her selling photos that she would otherwise post for free?
@@misseselise3864
To her stalker. Are you 15 years old???
Oh, that law enforcement officer took it VERY seriously
@@misseselise3864 accepting money and directly contacting someone who is stalking your MINOR daughter only causes them to feel more emboldened to reach out/push boundaries. I can't help but think that if they never sold the photos, he never would have felt like he had a close enough bond with her to ask for explicit content, never would have sent hundreds of dollars, and while he probably still would have made some sort of contact/attempt to harm her or someone else, i bet it wouldnt have been with a gun and it wouldnt have been with intent to kill. They opened up a door and shut it in his face, hes a violent psychopath with an obsession for little girls, they should have protected their daughter before he almost killed her.
@@misseselise3864oh my God do you not understand that when you start giving an obsessed person what they want they do not become less obsessed nor do they become less dangerous.
Omg - her parents allowed her to sell pictures of herself? That’s really bizarre. I’ve never heard of anything like that. Not trying to victim blame. Sounds like she was also a victim of her parents.
Victim blaming is a morally idiotic concept. It's perfectly appropriate to blame someone (victim or otherwise) for things they have genuinely done wrong.
Please Google Eric Justin ... he is a ghost. Greedy parents making up a story, perhaps?
@@eadweard. she’s still a child in the care and custody of her parents so I don’t think that concept fits this particular circumstance
@@natalielawyerchick We all want to act like these teenage girls are complete idiots and Inherently naïve. However I may be in my early 40s but I remember vividly being a teenage girl!
Many are a lot smarter than you think. They know there’s value in their looks and they know how to manipulate! Teenage girls probably lie more than married men do!
@@eadweard. I agree. Victim-blaming has morphed into one of the more cynical rhetorical tactics.
It's entirely possible to want to hold a criminal accountable for their crimes while also questioning the wisdom and choices of a victim. If I walk down a dark alley in a bad neighborhood in the middle of the night and get mugged you can still want to perpetrator caught and argue my decision was a bad one.
What kind of parents are these to allow this?! I absolutely agree that it was self defense, but selling your daughter’s photos??? Wtf?
Great analysis Dr Grande, as always!
It sounds as though her parent's did a cost/risk analysis of her safety versus $2000 a video and decided on the latter. Got to pay the rent.
All parties including Eric would have been aware that those photos were not worth $300. Eric believed he was entitled to additional access to Ava and that it was his right. He likely became enraged when he was basically told to f--off. Ava’s parents should have known this whole senecio was creepy at best and dangerous at worst
They exploits their daughter in my opinion.
It's child exploitation and it has to stop.
@@Koozomec it may very well be but it's not regulated nor is it illegal, today. It's time guidelines & legal definitions were put into place. Each state needs a call to action for children who are working in the public eye. You may be to young to remember but this has already happened with the actress that portrayed the older sister in the Poltergeist movie franchise & had a TV show with Paw Dawber called "My Sister Sam". That young woman had a stalker very similar to this story. She was gunned down & killed at her front door.
@@Kimberly-Fredrick I'm 41 :) i never had heard about this actress but thank you for your thougthfull comment.
J Lennon was killed by a stalker and other celebrities (or even anonymous individuals) suffers from this disturbing behaviour.
The parents have put her in harm's way by exploiting this guy unhealthy obsession.
If they had reported him he would have eventually been able to seek help (who knows ?).
They did nothing "illegal" but they are very "unethical" in my opinion.
YES! STALKER'S ARE SCARY AND SUPER DANGEROUS
They might be if they were signed prints. A digital download no, but if she signed them & mailed them, then yeah. ( still doesn't give the creep the right to think he was special to her. He paid for them. Special people would have been gifted them for free. I don't wanna give a stalker an out here. lol)
Allowing the daughter to sell her photos was bad enough, but letting her accept additional money-hundreds!-via Venmo was a terrible idea. That amount of money could be considered an “investment” and could suggest future interactions to an obsessive fan. There’s no way this situation could have ended well. I don’t know if it’s worth it for the father to consider killing the occasional stalker in order to keep his kid’s TikTok career going.
They should have refunded it. Keeping it was foolish
Hey, that's just collateral damage on her quest to fame and fortune! /s
@@theowlshowofficial9563 I agree.
It’s all about the money, letting a minor sell any type of photos is pretty sickening. Can’t understand these parents.
Stalking someone esp a child should be the problem here...
I can't believe he would let his underage daughter sell pictures of herself
People will sell tier souls (or their child's soul) for money in a heartbeat; Kris Jenner leveraged her daughter's sex tape into a literally business empire. Let that sink in
"He started asking pictures for her feet" .... Well that escalated quickly.
@@immanuelsuleiman7550 Hey, that's some of Kim's best work. Show some respect.
they were photos of her face. what’s wrong with her selling photos that she would otherwise post for free?
@@EricK-tb2dn lol damn right on target
Yes retired cop father...she IS a minor..selling images and putting them out there..SO creepy
The real scary part of this are the “friends” around her that sold her info and put her at greater risk of a stalker. That’s just cold blooded greed.
The scary part is the PARENTS allowing her to do this stuff.
No the real scary part is her parents letting her sell pictures of herself to men.
Yes, I don't know why no one was talking about these greedy jerks under the guise of 'friends'.
@@megsie1424 probably because they are also children. The adults dropped the ball here.
When the parents sold the pictures of their child to a man, that sounds like trafficking to me. Smh
I wonder about the stage parents aspect of this analysis. You mentioned that Ava’s parents were surprised about how much money she was able to make on TikTok. Is there a typical personality profile that would explain the parents’ behavior? They put their daughter’s life at risk selling pictures to a stalker.
Yes, I was thinking the same thing. I would never give my kids full access to the internet. You have to watch them, like a hawk. The parents seem odd to me. They knew this guy was stalking her, and let him BUY photos? Something isn't right with them. As a former police officer, he knows what a stalker is like. Terrible parenting, IMO. Great comment, btw. ❤
They are called greedy stage parents.
Hate to tell you, but no they did not put their daughters life at risk. The lunatic that showed up with a shotgun, put her life at risk, as well as their own.
@@jhoughjr1 while i agree that they did not directly put her life at risk, they still basically pimped out their daughter and seem to accept the higher risk of getting stalked for a handful of money
It is strange that the parents allowed this at all while these photos dont seem overtly sexual some are very suggestive.
I dont see how a parent thinks this is appropriate especially one that worked in law enforcement and dealt with pedos and perverts.
It just doesnt sit right and to think what would have been done to his daughter if the shotgun had been used properly. Yet they still encourage a 15 year old to make money with her appearance using the same site that lead to this.
Why would any sensible parent allow their very young children to be on any platform like that?? She's far too young to how high the risk may be, but the parents....
As always, such an interesting video, Dr. Grande, loved your final thoughts also!
I think there's a difference between watching videos on tik tok, recording videos for tik tok like to your favorite song or quote or actually making money off of that. I asume tik tok has a way to make your account "not public" and i don't think there 's an issue if kids are singing along to their favorite song in front of a camera, the issue lies within a public profile filled with videos and pictures of a minor that naturally are going to attract some creeps and instead of monitoring the interactions and blocking these creeps as one should and making sure personal info remains private(like their adress ffs), they proceeded to milk the money machine regardless of the risk associated with being famous.
Why would any sensible parent let their 15 year old drive a car? Watch TV? Go outside?
The money
Florida's best.
This is a way to generous reading to me. Her parents care about the money she’s making and not much else. I can’t think of a sane parent who would sell pictures of their minor daughter to a strange man. And then when said strange man breaks into their home with a gun still decides that their daughter should continue her social media account. Their putting money before their daughters safety
Yes, exactly!
Exactly. And not only daughters but other kids too. These parents are pimps. Full stop.
I G it's a shame her parents don't want her to stop .
Yup! They're obviously milking her fame for money. Just imagine all the gross men and boys looking at her photos and videos. And they seem ok with that. So they shouldn't be surprised if a number of these ppl turn out to be creeps, stalkers and psychopaths.
The parents bare some of the responsibility of putting their family in danger. Selling pics of children is just too far.
Bear, nor bare.
100% right
Nope. The responsibility lies with the parents of the stalker. I cant believe they encouraged his behavior.
@@jhoughjr1 you're not srs, are you?
@@pythondrink autistically so.
Look around. Parents are lazier and offloading responsibilities at pace with an increase in these types of things.
I can also tell you that parent influence their kids not by what they say, but by what they do.
Do these parents have any control of their child's life? Letting your daughter dance around in a sports bra for the entertainment of young men is a little gross.
Welcome to TikTok
In fact they do not. The same commenters on here would bash the parents as trying to control their daughter if they did the opposite. The culture promotes girls to act like that
@@willnill7946 I think it would be different commentators.
@@willnill7946 nope. She literally had someone try to kill her and possibly her family. Those parents shouldn’t let her on anymore.
@@willnill7946 Agree culture promotes attractive women/girls 'promoting' their beauty like that, but also agree with Diann T that it's different people saying the two things. Not everyone is a woke lib fem.
When a kid this young is this involved in social media, I think the identity is formed by the response he/she gets on social media. Adoration and fame can lead to narcissism; notoriety and hatred can lead to self-disgust-both poor for the development of a happy and healthy person. I think kids have a false sense of security when there’s a screen between them and other people. When there’s no longer a screen, things get real and that’s what happened here in this case.
Your analysis was very thoughtful, Dr. G. I appreciate your balanced view on placing responsibility on the right person while using the parents’ lack of insight to caution others. Really well done! ❤️
I’m incredibly grateful that I had a chance to mature into an adult before I was soaked in the current culture of achieving online “fame”.
I was groomed and stalked at 14, and the stalking went on for over 2 decades. Cops here take far too long to respond in emergencies, hence I bought a gun that I'm comfortable with and fully trained to use. And if the need arises, I will not hesitate to defend myself and/or my family with lethal force, if need be. It's vital to know how to protect yourself and to be willing to do so. If you hesitate, that's when your weapon gets wrenched from your hands and used against you. And you don't have to be a celebrity to have someone inappropriately fixate on you, in often dangerous ways.
The gas station analogy was spot on. You would think a former cop would be more protective over a daughter in the “public eye”. Perhaps the her potential future fame blinded them all a little bit in this scenario.
The former cop sounds more like a pimp
@@888strummer 💯. And I’d like to know why “former”. He’s not THAT old.
@@Mama_Bear524 wouldn’t be shocked if he retired because of all the income his daughter’s bringing in…..which might be why they’re keeping her on TikTok after all this 🤦♂️
@@NewscasterNews4 after that close call i'd be too afraid to go back on tik tok😮
American cops are not known for their intelligence or higher education or any other good qualities the police force in the usa is basicly a secondhand dump drain after the first drain called the military a dumping ground for low income low class dumb uneducated people spit out and left behind by their own society brainwashed or gaslighted in to slavery to keep the rest of the people free 😂😂😂😂 jeez
Money talks! They are still allowing her to be on social media! Smh.
They like the money too much
They need to stop selling their daughter’s pictures to strangers and get her off on tiktok jfc
The problem began with poor parenting that encouraged poor choices made by their underage child. It was all downhill from there.
That’s what I was thinking too.
You worded that a lot better than I was going to. I can't believe they are still encouraging her to do this crap. Some people never learn.
NOt a word about the dead guys parents. I guess the ppl that raised him were ideal.
They certainly didnt fuck up their kid.
@@48mastadon well how many more guys are gonna show up with a shotgun now?
@@jhoughjr1 I think fewer than otherwise would have, at least I hope.
Allowing one's child to trade their photos for cash with some internet creeper is child endangerment at the very least...so sad.
Agreed.
Exactly. The money is more important
Once they found her “friends” were selling information about her they should have confronted them. Secondly, they should have cut all contact with that person and never accepted any money from him. Some people believe giving money or gifts entitles them to more than the recipient believes is acceptable.
seem to me like: lol....lets take this sucker for a ride (2 photos for $300 is bullshit) and it kinda didnt turn out like they expected. they probably assumed he would just piss off after wasting his money.
Were they actual friends - people she knew in real life - or online friends ?
I always enjoy Dr. Grande’s metaphors, e.g, selling photos to a stalker to make money is like standing next to a burning gas station to stay warm....
“Only speculating 👀 on what could be happening in a situation like this”
Kills me every time 😂
These parents were willing to make money selling photographs of their underage daughter to a potential stalker. Child Protective Services needs to investigate.
I think it this was to get money but to get rid of Eric.
Tik Tok is where brain cells go to die. I had a similar problem with Madonna, although she was in love with me and wrote a few songs about me, it was infuriating that she never returned my calls or letters. 😢
The parents legitimized this “relationship” by ALLOWING PHOTOS OF THEIR MINOR DAUGHTER TO BE SOLD!! Did they think Eric would just frame the photos of their daughter?
The whole TikTok thing is very disturbing to the world . It's another plauge . On humanity & social graces.
Very interesting video, Dr. Grande. I think the phenomenon of social media is something we need to pay attention to but I don't think we realize all the reasons why or how we need to be vigilant. It's very uncharted territory, and coming from a mom of 21 and 17 year olds, it's a learning curve for sure.Thank you for another stellar and thought provoking talk.
I think we are going to be the experiment for the rest of the world to see.
My boy is almost 2 and the way things stand now I dont want him to have any access to social media at all till he is out of high school.
The issue is that a majority of parents wont do the same so he has to grow with kids that are under that spell. All the while he might feel as tho he is missing out on something vital and that may drive him to it in a worse way.
@@novac1990 @Suttree I thought that I would do the same but it didn't work that way. I have friends who would routinely go through their kids' phones every night, checking every interaction. But there are apps we don't know about, the kids will always be a step ahead of us. I know it's hard to feel it right now with a toddler, but there will come a time when you have to just believe in what you've taught your kids and trust them.
I really can't imagine how many narcissistic young adults we're gonna have in 5 9r 10 years when all of these of these kids who grew up on these self centered social media platforms
Exactly. It's made me very glad I didn't grow up with social media.
All according to plan. Tiktok incentivized hard work and social currency in China; in America, it incentivizes stupidity , woke shit and twerking.
probably about as many as we do now. boomers and gen x are two of the most narcissistic and entitled generations alive so I cant see future generations being too far off.
@@user-sl5td9uh7q
You err in thinking that anyone in those generations will come close to wielding any semblance of power the way we understood it before the 2020s; once AI starts being legislated favorably- and once its capacities allow for its mass application worldwide on government-scale- most millennials and zoomers will be hyper-managed serial numbers with varying degrees of pay-grade and resource allotment based on their utility and compliance.
Already too many.
She didn’t want her friends making money off her so she cut ties with them but she sure as hell wanted the money herself so instead of reporting this psycho stalker to the police, she decided to negotiate with the crazy and sell her pictures to him directly. You don’t make deals with your stalkers, at least her father should have known the potential dangers of it. It’s like adding fuel to the fire. Stalkers are extremely entitled people. If you give them your finger, they will try to grab your hand. What good could have come from dangling a carrot in front of an obsessed stalker? The obsession only grew when she started dealing with him directly and sold him her photos. The parents should have known better,smh.
No no no! We are NOT blaming the minor here. Not even the slightest bit.
This started when she was 13-14 years old. A literally tween/teen. A small idiot. She is not developed enough to even know all the warning signs. I look back at decisions I made at that age and realize that I was one bad decision from a lot of bad situations.
This lies squarely on the parents. Their greed and consent to these practices put their daughter and themselves in danger. At no point in this story is it saying that this girl was doing anything behind her parents back. And she cut ties with the classmates selling her information. I think she made the best decisions she could and her parents, whom should've had the brain capacity to cut this to the quick right away, made her think this was okay and thus have traumatized her for life. They have made her aware of the most horrible aspects of the world before she got the chance to see it organically. They have failed their child and do not deserve her, especially since they haven't learned their lesson and still allow her on social media.
A possibility could be that in their view, they thought that giving him a bone, he'll be "satisfied" and leave them alone. A bad idea to be sure.
@@MiyaMam948 Agree but I wouldn't call young people idiots...they literally have not had the same life experience (in most cases) as those older than them and do not have the capacity to think about decisions and consequences equally (due to frontal lobe development as well as lack of experiences). In fact, the idea that young people are self-obsessed morons is probably why there's such a huge lack of inter-generational understanding. Once we pass those periods in our lives, we're happy to treat all with disgust who are going through the SAME phases and periods in their lives as we did and sometimes doing the same things.
@@keysaysassah I said that to make a point
Report him to the police for what beyond him threatening to shoot her door down? Before he threatened to shoot them, he wasn't breaking any laws. He was still online stalking, but he wasn't breaking any laws.
Dr. Grande said the family moved from New Jersey to Naples, FL, and that dad was a retired police officer. He failed to mention that dad's nickname at work was Barney Fife and that he took it as a compliment.
Call me old-fashioned, but my daughter would be removed from all social media. She is probably supporting her family with the money she brings into the household.
I do believe the shooting was justified.
shooting was justified, the pimping on the other hand...
I also think she is supporting her family to some extent with the money she makes.
That is right.
LOL yeah you would think that, but teens have a way of keeping their parents in the dark historically.
Its quite hard to keep tech away from teens if they want it bad enough.
A friend went a similar issue with step children.
For all his attempts ar control, he's now divorced and they are doing what they want anyway.
@@abadran8174 I dont think you know what a pimp is.
When money is more important to parents then morals.
Well said.
Screw morals, when money is more important than your child's safety
How are father can let his 15-year-old child sell pictures of herself is beyond me I don’t care how much money she’s bringing in this is the consequence of selling your photos to men it’s disgusting
Exactly! Soon she will be selling something else. The greed of some parents are just awful. It’s a shame!
My daughter is 12, and shes just asked me if she can have a tiktok account.
Im going to have her watch this video with me before even contemplating it.
Thanks Dr Grande!
Dr. Grande: Your wish is granted.
Me: oh my god
Thanks for the video!!! ❤️ Your work ethic continues to impress and inspire me!
Your dry humor is hilarious. People don’t always get your humor. I appreciate it. I love your videos! ❤️❤️
Dr. Grande love all of your content! Thanks for the late night vid 😊
There is so much wrong about this. She was 15. 15!!!! Why are her parents letting her correspond with an 18 year old man? Why would they let her sell her pictures to this guy?
The only thing that makes sense is that her father took the guy down.
It's worse. She's 15 now. She was 13 then.
I have difficulty with this; people who are underage, having never worked at achieving anything tangible, not ever really working, or finding true artistic expression beyond the odd confines of the tech. Then the idea that this underaged person was supported by her parents; this only supports the implication then that none of these people really understood what plane of "reality" they were dealing with. In all this is just a horrific modern expression of the possible incapacity of humanity to deal with teenage hormonal response to stimuli which feeds a desire which is so easily accessed via the tech such as in this case.
The question then becomes, are we as human beings really able to deal with the "social networks" as defined by high tech? Perhaps these are more detrimental than advantageous as described by the providers of these networks. I could live without UA-cam. I could perhaps be better off not even paying attention to this. What is one's humanity, what are the lines that define who one is?
I think you are asking the right questions. I think "Bret Weinstien" said it best when he said "We are living in a era of hyper novelty with little ability to understand and adapt to its effects".
I think of certain chapters in human history and always thought the era of grand mistakes like "Nazi Germany" and "Communist Russia". I wonder of those people new they were living In the most pivotal lessons for future generations and now I wonder if here in this place and time we are begining to touch that threshold ourselves.
Personally, I take the idea that , like doctors, you harm no- one. Easier said than done, but so far I got to 59 by harming nobody.
So far. . . 👁👁
I think we are too far gone at this point.
@@davidripley2916 what
Have you ever considered doing a video on the ABBA stalker who moved to Sweden, and ended up in a two year relationship with the target of his affections? It's one of those stories that is just too weird to be made up.
If you get right down to it...Yoko Ono was a major stalker and look where she ended up!
I remember when there was a Stalking craze in the 90's, Sharon Stone was asked what she would do if a stalker came into her home. She replied "I was raised on a farm with guns and I am a crack shot. I sleep with a gun under my pillow and he would be dead before he hit the floor".
The perfect video to watch while I head to sleep, thank you Dr. Grande 💜
Dr Grande your precise and insightful assessment is very much appreciated.....I see your overarching opinion is that the parents were culpable in this situation and was avoidable.
A minor should not be selling images of themselves in the public forum.....and any parent endorsing this for the mere reason of "earning money" is not justifiable.
I just watched the news update on this story.
Way to be on the ball Doc!
First "stand your ground law" case I've heard that actually seems legitimate. Glad the young girl wasn't harmed.
What illegitimate ones have you heard about?
Great conclusion; warming up at a burning gas station. I always like hearing your detailed firearms expertise.
Mahalo for another thought provoking video, Dr. Grande.
Thank you Dr. Grande! My thoughts exactly! Great episode as usual!
Couldn't help but think that this case had a common theme for a thriller/suspense movie. On a serious note, I think letting minors get some sort of fame on the internet, should be illegal. The world is full of danger and crazy's.
But by that logic why let minors get fame through any other medium? And how do you even prevent that? Like the only way to prevent a minor becoming famous would be to prevent them from being on the internet at all. And then what happens when they turn 18? Now they have the ability to use and become famous on the internet but with none of the training to properly manage that fame.
@@joelman1989 idk bro i'm not an expert i just say what I think in the most intellectual way i can just to sound like I know what I'm talking about when i actually dont get baited bruh LMAO
@@joelman1989
I dont think many children at all have the capacity to handle the amount of attention and scrutiny that comes with being famous all the while they are still in development.
The amount of kid actors who either overdosed or are a basket case now that there older is evidence enough.
*Social media is social cancer.* It was just a matter of time. There's no sanity requirement on the internet & it shouldn’t be presumed you’re dealing with sanity. This places the responsibility on Ava for enabling his stalking by offering photos in exchange for money & the parents for not seeing the situation for what it was. Eric is obviously responsible for his actions, but as Benjamin Franklin said “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”
That was another excellent analysis, and I thank you for your expertise. His life story had a sad ending but the story in general had a happy ending. I'm always happy when the criminal is stopped or killed and the victim is saved. Better a guilty one dies then a innocent one.
Great advice. This information needs to be out there in this day and age.
Great psychology of stalkers explained.
I also always love your rounding up humor and final thoughts, always a satisfying end.
I hope to be a great psychology student someday soon.
Good evening Dr. G., a late night post! Thank you for a pleasant surprise!
It’s amazing how our society has devolved to the level where a child of this age being on social media is “normal”. Nothing good will come out of this!
Wow, what the heck were her parents thinking? Especially with her father being an ex-policeman! Were they on commission? 😕
And where was the" brave" dad when his baby daughter selling pictures on social media!! Why a child should be allowed to do so!
Taking his cut, obviously.
Dr Grande, thank you for the great content you upload daily, your sensitive and unbiased analysis, never fails to make my day .
Thank you Dr. Grande for this analysis. I don't know anything about Tick-tock's trends nor follow "influencers", perhaps because I'm old enough or just because I was never someone to be "influenced" by someone who didn't have certain talent that could actually "influence" me.
I think we all could agree that the shooting of the stalker was in self defense. But the greater and deeper issues are the ones leading to the shooting. Greed is, in my opinion, what let this parents allow her 13 year old daughter to have presence on social media and "manage her career" selling her photos to adult men. That disgust me. I think if a child has talent on a certain area, it's good to support them, they could have taken her to dance lessons or model classes, whatever she wanted at that time, or allowed her to have her account on social media, but monitoring as they should, she was just a girl. The parents (or at least the father) took advantage of her daughter's popularity for profit. This put her in terrible danger. And her so-called "friends", awful too. I think this girl probably will struggle with some sort of mental health issue as an adult if she keeps it up like with all this social media pseudo-celebrity.
I've read about a phenomenon in South Korea of extreme fans of pop bands, a mixture of stalkers and self made paparazzis, called "Sasaeng". Many of them are young females. It would be great if you could analyze this phenomenon if you had the time.
They didn’t learn a lesson. I am 100% against kids and teenagers on social media!!!! Amazing job Dr.Grande.
This was an excellent analysis Of just have Vulnerable a 15 year old TickTock star is. Just an excellent show Dr. Grande and thank you for presenting it.
Keep in mind she was 13 at the time. They just decided to talk about it now. That makes it even creepier.
You make me fall asleep often during your analysis. It's the best sleep I get. Thank you
You can have a social media presence and make money without being a histrionic hussy. Good god! The father would have been more heroic if he had the balls to put a stop to his jailbait daughter's outrageously suggestive behavior. Imagine how much worse it would have been if he wasn't home?
Best comment in this comments section.
Fantastic analogy about the gas station. Lots going there! And the stalker breakdown. Spot on. Thank you, Doc!
Interesting case as always. Thank you! Maybe you can cover the "Press your luck guy," Micheal Larson?
Hello Dr Grande. I think you'll get a kick out of an assessment of Diana and Jonathan Toebbe.
Sir you are QUICK! I was just reading about this 10hrs ago!
I clicked on this video and heard this man say four words before immediately clicking on that subscribe button. I’m strapped in fella, where we going?
I suspect there will be much more collateral damage as we all navigate the techno razors edge we are riding at speed. If you ever stop doing true crime Dr. Grande you could do sleep therapy audio with your steady, calming voice.
Thank you so much for not victim blaming. I really appreciate that you don’t blame a 13 year old girl for being naïve and recognize that the person responsible is the stalker, not the victim even when she made a mistake. It is important to only hold someone responsible for their own actions, not the actions of others toward them.
The internet has completely revealed who the creepiest 'people' are.
totally not the guy who showed up with a shotgun. Not his fault at all. Totally the girls parents fault. Not his or his parents fault at all.Had he been 17 and 364 days, well his parents would be responsible, but the next day, what parents, he's an adult!
@@jhoughjr1 Exactly.
Ultimately, people get what they deserve.
Dr. Grande you are always up to date with the trending cases. Awesome!
I was reading about the different delusional disorders just a couple of days ago and there was one about a person who becomes obsessed with a celebrity- Erotomanic disorder. Sounds like maybe Eric was experiencing that?
I wondered about this case doc. I wouldn't know how to word the request. So I'm glad someone else wondered
The offender himself was a child. His parents should have been more involved in his life to have recognised something was amiss and taken care of him giving him the right kind of support.
A lot of parents have little idea what interactions happen on the internet. Many years ago, I wouldn't have known but for my ten year old son saying "Hee hee hee, I saw some naked girls when I googled 'sex'..." So I did the same and "Ahhh yuk. How do we go about blocking stuff, husband?"
Excellent analysis Dr. Grande! Thank you for covering this topic.
It's weird to me that so much of the focus is on the idiotic parents and the girl. What about her poor brother? He's trapped in a pretty disturbing and unhealthy environment until he can move out.
Your analysis resonated 100% Dr. Grande! Thank you.
I wouldn’t want a daughter to be on TikTok as a young teenager ( or any time, actually). I believe if I were her I’d stay off social media. That was a horrible incident.
Thank you for another analysis, Dr Grande.
Would you consider looking at the case of John Christie, 10 Rillington Place?
Thanks again!
Ava's father a retired police officer (income unknown or any at all?) and her mother (employment unknown)
and 3 children in house.
I certainly hope they aren't supporting the entire household using Ava's TIK TOK and other social media accounts earnings.
😬 Yikes.
Dr. Grande you are Amazing! You are on it!! Your work ethic is inspiring. Thank you so much
How the hell were her parents ok with any of that? Selling minor pictures to her adult stalker?!
Im going to St Leo's university in September for forensic psychology. I can't wait to study this
I don't get how her schoolmates and "friends" just sold her out to that nutcase and thought that was a-okay - in this day & age where everyone has heard of crazy stalkers, how could they think that was a safe thing to do?
Perhaps too young to know better? About 14 years old at the time.
This is the most insightful comment I've seen on this board so far!
I liked the description of stalker characteristics near the end.
selling him pictures meant giving him hopes..bad ideas and bad parenting
Dr. Grande, the way you say, "TikTok" has me cackling!!! 🤣 you crack me up. Thanks for covering this!
I usually don't really think stand your ground laws are that flash, but in this situation, it makes total sense.