Resisting Indoctrination | Abigail Shrier
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- Опубліковано 4 тра 2024
- Ben sat down with author Abigail Shrier to discuss her new book 'Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren’t Growing Up,' in which Shrier discusses the troubling trend of weaponizing mental health in education and parenting, and explores how an excessive focus on therapy tends to medicalize normal challenges faced by children. So, is the current trend in health practices transforming ordinary childhood challenges into pathological issues? Join us as we delve into this and much more on this episode of The Sunday Special.
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My son got in trouble when he was in kindergarten because he told a girl he liked his drawing the best. She told on him and he got in trouble and a letter sent home for bullying. I’ve been homeschooling for eight years now.
why would you change yours & your son’s entire life as a result of one little incident?? grow some
Wasn’t that a tad overreaction on your part ?
LOL. The homeschooling is fine, but don't uproot your life because of what somebody else does. Your kid would have been fine realizing how to manage the BS in public schools. Most people just realize what is going on and get through it.
Nothing wrong with taking pride in your own drawing. If I could homeschool I would. But I’ve seen how my kids have benefited from being around other kids.
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
There are way too many parents that have no idea that your #1 job is to hold the line. Your kids don’t actually feel loved when you don’t know how to have boundaries and maintain them. WEAK PARENTING is an epidemic.
Sometimes I see kids that are more mature than their parents.
I see that all the time. It's both sad and pathetic.
@@spartjovic ...and encouraging.
They probably are. Until they spend too much time around their parents. And then the saying applys The Apple doesn't fail far from the tree, becomes retroa
Yes, thankfully it's not that easy to screw up an entire generation, and good nature can overcome bad nurture
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
If parents don’t discipline their children and are not there for their children this is what happens…parents love your children
Ben gag order Shapiro
Ben Shapiro bullies his kids - I have seen him in Florida scream and curse at them. Ben, your kids are going to need therapy as adults.
Gen X had no parents around. We learned to raise ourselves. We didn't need kittens and rainbows and gummies and safe spaces, lol. This is from helicopter parents and parents who want to be their kid's best friend, not their parent.
@@user-qi6hq5iq1fkids need discipline. Without that, they end up like Zs.
@@katashley1031 Well said. These Millenials and Gen Z are wimps lol Gen X is the best
If you treat children like they're incompetent, fragile, unstable and weak - then most will become like that...
But today, that's what they're counting on because playing the victim pays.
@@maxigol1977 Might seem that way on the surface, because whining is loud, but no responsibility also means no power or control. The squeaky wheel gets the grease ...until it gets ignored, then tossed away...
Kinda like how Ben Shapiro has been with the gag order he put against Candace Owens. What an authoritarian snowflake
That's true not only for individuals, but for groups of people and entire countries.
@@RocketGator05 Gag order? Well, it certainly hasn't shut her up; she just has to do her talking on a different channel.
I was gaslit and guilted into “gentle parenting”. I fell for it all. I’d have professionals watching my son be violent and out of control and simply talk to him calmly or “redirect his behavior”. It NEVER WORKED, only made it worse. One day, while trying to stop my son from running into a street, he head butted me and started thrashing about,kicking me violently. Something in me snapped that day. I took him inside, sat him down and said “we’re done here” and I took away all his toys and privileges and forced him to sit in time out. It took MONTHS for me to “break him” and now, three years later, he’s a completely different child. I’m finally able to enjoy being a mom and now he can grow into a confident child who can (for the most part) control himself.
Amen, I’m proud of you! Sometimes it just takes a really bad experience to make us wake up the next day with a more confident, “This is MY responsibility” attitude that changes our outlook, our attitude, and our tone of voice in a way that communicates that “Mom loves me but she is also in charge.” Good for you!
That's the natural growth of a child lady. You 'breaking' him is simply you imposing your own insecurities to control him.
If you can't deal with the natural 'head budding' that comes with raising a child 2-4 years old. Then you have no business raising them.
I guarantee you that going down your road with destroy your child and he will walk on eggshells around you forever OR disown you.
My own mother was an NPD disorder that tried to 'break' me at every step of my life. I had to disown her because she was intent on manipulating my sister, my wife, and my own child into thinking I was a bad person.
You have problems; not your child.
@@vladimirofsvalbard9477 stop your psychobabble. You don’t have to read abuse into everything. Sounds like you’re the one with insecurities.
@@vladimirofsvalbard9477You know nothing about raising kids.
@@vladimirofsvalbard9477I’m interested; how many children have you raised?
I grew up in a household where, "Do you want me to give you something to cry about?" was a final warning, not an empty threat. My parents always asked about my opinions & views, but only because I respected them as parents.
I heard that a few times growing up too 😂
So you are basically trying to tell us that you use to be a "Brat"..😶
@@jennifersangma8766what makes him a brat? You must have been a little princess
@@jennifersangma8766no kids ?
@@williambarth5271 what makes you triggered 😶 I did not claim anything I am just assuming according to her comment and by the way from the name it seems She is not he 🧐
Just heard this on Daily Wire. Absolutely spot on! I had been around little kids with their parents recently, and I was stunned by the constant negotiations, and choices that were presented to the children, along with the total disrespect, silliness, and rudeness by the kids. It was nothing but constant chaos. The only reprimands made were from the wife to her husband when he didn't deal with the kids in the same gentle manner as she. A no win situation. Absolutely tiring. Correct, no wonder people are having fewer kids when family life is a literal insane asylum run by the patients !
"Just heard this on Daily Wire"
well, this is the Daily Wire. So you heard it here, the same thing you've heard... here? What a coincidence
I am Canadian raised by loving Athenian Greek parent. All Greek mom slippers are whipped as frisbees and dads give you the look. That’s when you know don’t F with them. We grew up to be respectful appreciative and acknowledged our elders. Sunday played significant opportunities interacting with relatives and family friends. Daily dinners was the strongest connection
yes 🎯
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
Why do you think Benji put a gag order on Candace Owens? He's definitely not a snowflake right? 🤔
As a former ESE teacher I noticed a huge increase in special needs students. In fact, I left and went back to interpreting because the caseload was ridiculous. I thought I would be helping children with real disabilities. Ask any ESE teacher. The paperwork and workload is awful. The ability to help those who really need it is limited because of the lack of time. All of this is linked to funding. The more students labeled the more money the school gets. The public schools are so broken.
Yep, I tried working public school last year. Each grade level has an overloaded SPED teacher, 23% of the population coded, another 10% on waiting list, and guidance running weekly units for each classroom on handling emotions and making good choices. I went back to outplacement schools and am far less stressed.
You are also forgetting that many parents want them labeled: extra time = higher grades, which, with the labeling, helps getting into college and possibly getting a scholarship.
I have joined some IEP groups on Facebook because my oldest is starting Kindergarten and I thought it might help. It's full of people whining because the school won't do more 😒 most likely because it's not necessary. My IEP meeting went amazingly well, but he's also been going to a special education preschool for the past 2 years. My goal is that my child will eventually not need the IEP, and these parents out here are doing everything they can to put more stuff in place or get whatever diagnosis they can so their child is "special."
Ben gag order Shapiro
You are sooo correct! I’m running for school board in my district because what I see as a classroom teacher is just insanity. We are not educating our children. Our ESE students and staff grow by the year. Everything in the school revolves around the needs of a few students, while we ignore the fact that we are failing our children as a whole. We need to be holding them to a higher standard. Children thrive when their boundaries are clear and applied to everyone.
Every time I hear a kid screaming in public, I always turn to my sons, 13 and 15 and say, "Do you hear that?"" That is what a bad parent sounds like." Both sons homeschooled, churched, and socialized in a good environment. They help with animals, garden and volunteer at senior center 4 hrs a week. I read a chapter of the Bible with them every morning, then we do a Hillsdale online collage class, and then we do a half hour of exercise. I am raising men not boys.
Wow, you are what a real Father should look like!!!!!🫡
So what do you say when you get your opinion fed to you by a youtuber that has built a empire off freedom of speech, Then agrees to debate an ex employee while getting a gag order placed on her? Do you look at them and say "If youre going to preach about something make sure you dont make a hypocrite out of yourself"?
@@DaaClaptainblah blah blah , your gossiping at best
We homeschool too.
I have three girls and a boy. The difference is wild.
My son is 2 and I watch him help his older sisters and baby sister. He seriously is a little man, it’s so cool. When my husband leaves the house he will say to our son “take care of mommy while I’m gone.” He understands that too. He makes sure he is the man of the house. So young!
I worked at a hardware store for 8 years. There were only a couple customers that included their sons in the process of selecting, purchasing and loading parts and materials. Most kids sat in the car or goofed around. These kids will have to pay someone else to do simple projects and fix problems. They better be wealthy.
I like the new set, it's more cozy and less dramatic. As a retired therapist that specialized in parenting, this is a breath of fresh air. However Dr. Haim Ginott, who was a trailblazer in accepting children's feelings always added all behavior is not acceptable. Without that last step, we get what we now see. It is extremely important for children to be able to identify and express their feelings without fear of punishment. So a child learns he is feeling angry that he is not getting a new phone . The parent acknowledges his anger but does not give in. The parent is secure enough to say "its hard when you want something and do not get it. I hear it. I have also experienced it. Even though we know we can't always have everything we want when we want it, I am frustrated when it happens". These feelings are ok to come out.
Great interview and discussion! I am a pediatric occupational therapist. My training and professional values are focused on a child’s functional independence. Chores as young as 3
are a great way to teach purpose,
Working together and responsibility. Now in college they are thriving as independent and contributing people.
I work with a kid who told me day one on the Archery Range, "I have ADD." He told me this because he wouldn't keep his feet planted on the ground. I teach a lot of boys who do the exact same thing, but someone told this kid he has ADD. He uses that as an excuse for everything.
ADHD would have trouble keeping feet on the ground. Can still learn to do so. ADD would have trouble focusing. can still learn to do so.
My oldest has ADHD, and my youngest has Autism. It will never be an excuse for their behavior. It will be a reason to try harder because it may take more effort for them to do what other kids do. I have worked in ISL's and with the adults that were told their whole lives they couldn't do something. It was so sad!
I’m Israeli and when Ben brought up the “random grandma in the playground” I was taken aback, it always seemed SO normal that I never even thought about it.
😂😂 but unfortunately it hasn't been passed on to the parents... it's a dying art😂
America use to be the same way. We grew up that way. In our neighborhood all parents could correct you. Where do you think they get: It takes a village to raise a child.
Can we have our 500 billion dollars back?
I'm also Israeli about to move to the States and that's one of the things I absolutely love about Israel that I KNOW I'm going to miss in America.
@@_shadownotes_ No. But as an American, you have the freedom to go volunteer in the humanitarian cause in Gaza. Otherwise, keep cutting Israel their checks. 😉🫢
Good parents already know 90% of this. Bad parents won't listen, they're sick. Try to get info to the youth as the teachers do.
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
I was a nanny for 20+ years. I found there were parents who were naturally good..like it was innate and the others who weren't either tried or were reading every book and were frustrated and mad it wasn't easy. However even the natural parent knows it's not easy. As a nanny on the older side I was able to coach the parents some. Honest, no cell phone, etc communication & engagement is the best.
I would have too.
Ben gag order Shapiro
Ben Shapiro bullies his kids - I have seen him in Florida scream and curse at them. Ben, your kids are going to need therapy as adults.
I will say that a lot of what they say about what the grandparents went through is the exact reason why I only watch old school tv shows and movies. That is because older shows and movies almost always had a moral ethic of right and wrong built into the storyline. For example Gunsmoke, The Andy Griffith show, Rawhide, Wagon Train, Bonanza and Tales of Wells Fargo just to name a few! Those shows are still played on INSP.
I agree that some parents give their kids everything when they should sometimes say No. I'm the type while I know that I shouldn't give in to everything the kid wants, it's difficult to ignore them and stand firm. But being firm is for the kid's benefit.
Sounds like churco family
This is insanity. I am constantly flabbergasted by the lack of firm parenting that seems to be today’s norm. it’s just ridiculous. they are children. they need boundaries, guidelines, rules & discipline. it’s not goddam rocket science. it’s just weak pathetic parenting
Abigail is doing God's work. Keeping the simple truth alive and keeping people informed. Love her 🤗
When I served in the US NAVY as a HN the doctors I worked for complained about how the spouses of military men would bring their children in asking for ADHD SCREENING? I AGREED WITH MY DOCTORS There was nothing wrong with those kids except needed more discipline..
When my son was 3, i noticed ADHD tendencies. I changed his diet and the way we disciplined. We had to stay tough with our 3 kids. I would tell them when i laid down the law, " it gives you something to talk to your therapist about ". Well my dughter went to a therapist and she told her she had a great childhood. So she stopped going.
Good she went to a good therapist! And good job, you.
Home schooling is the best defense.
Not if the parent is trash.
Yes Ben 👏 loved your example about how the phrase “that’s not fair” isn’t acknowledged in your household. And the example of community discipline in Israel…. this is what’s needed everywhere
Ben Shapiro bullies his kids - I have seen him in Florida scream and curse at them. Ben, your kids are going to need therapy as adults.
my daughter is 3 and has chores she feeds her cats in the morning fills their water bowl up she gives them their treats, helps vacuum and cleans up her toys when shes finished playing with them. this is amazing responsibility for her and she really loves it lol.... amazing ben thanks again for your work :)
I think this not only teaches a child responsibility, it also helps them feel like a valuable part of the family.
Correlation is not causation but the correlation between rise of therapy and the decline of mental health warrants investigation.
Ben, thanks for having Abigail Shrier on your show! She is absolutely BRILLIANT!!
So was Candice Owens…
Abigail Shrier always gives such informative and well researched and reasoned interviews. Thank you for hosting her.
These new age parenting, so-called gurus and bubble wrap parents. Don't know what they're talking or on about. I've got no time, for that nonsense that doesn't work.
Two of my favorite journalists! I look forward to the Sunday special each week. Great work, Ben.
I think Ben meant to say "we all use shortcuts, if you have a medical problem you go to 'someone like my wife, who is a doctor, a real doctor not like our first lady'"
I love the conversation at about 30 minutes. I teach first grade and I have several students who have this mindset that I'm supposed to sit there and coddle them for 30 minutes over nothing. Some students have no resilience. One cried over the fact a boy colored a girl lion with a mane and sat under the coats expecting me to coddle her. I asked her if he knew that she wanted it that way, and she said no. I told her you HAVE to be able to communicate with others and told her to rejoin when she was ready. When Abigail at 33 mins said that they need to be told its not an appropriate response to a situation, I haven't been doing that. I'll start doing mentioning that to the students as they react inappropriately to a variety of situations I encounter.
I also tell my students daily to walk it off and they'll live lol.
Matthew 10:32 Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven.
33 But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven.
Isaiah 45 7 KJV yeah...old testament and new testament are absolutely in no way legitimately the same religous roots. No fucking way wrathful and genocidal Old T Jehovah is cheek turner Jesus...myths, man, myths.
Repent of idolatry and obey the seven Noahide laws. You and your ilk are here to harass an observant Jewish man.
Well, my jaw just hit the floor!
I cant believe this started happening with and to kids.
I married at 20 and had my only child, a son, at 22.
So a Millennial, born in 1993.
I'm Gen X and raised him with how I grew up, with consequences for bad behavior.
I left many restaurants and grocery stores when he was 1 1/2- 2 1/2 going through the defiant period like "the terrible 2s".
I finally explained he had to now stay home with his dad because he'd misbehave.
My son hit all milestones early, even the bad one's.
So he tested our parenting skills from early on.
Later on, I found out he had a very high IQ and was more mature for his age.
Thankfully he had a Pediatrician that I loved and didn't diagnose him with some disorder or syndrome.
He was just smart and became bored easily.
At 15, he was accepted into a high school on a university campus 90 minutes from home.
At 16, he left home to attend that school that did not have grades 9 and 10.
Only 11-12.
So off he went to school, away from home, being taught college level courses.
He spoke Japanese fluently and could also read and write in Japanese.
This is in Indiana, so i was surprised that they offered that opportunity.
No teacher ever said he was misbehaving in school, or inattentive in any way.
Not his Pediatrician that he saw every single year up to age 18.
I'm glad I had him in 1993, and not 5-10 years later.
I worked in a Christian school and daycare in 2001 for a few years since my son was in school now.
Those kids amazed me from their bad behavior.
Biting, temper tantrums, hitting other kids, and they were 2-3 and 1/2!
They received time out and were expelled if the biting habit did not stop.
You cannot cater to one child over another.
Teachers were also not allowed to diagnose a child with anything.
No wonder kids are so messed up now!
Titus 2
I must say i have much respect for Ben Shapiro. He gives alot of game and content and information for free. Appreciate it folks he could make ppl pay for this work!
I'd pay for more of his "Ben Shapiro plays video games" videos 🤣
PEOPLE NEED DELIVERANCE SPIRITUALITY!!! Lack of understanding our spiritual person, is keeping many in bondage in the natural!
Yes. Repent and obey the seven Noahide laws! ✡️❤️
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
Not everything is a demon in need of deliverance people 🤦♂️
Abigail Shrier's talk at Hillsdale 3 years ago rocked my "woke" worldview. Great discussion! Thanks.
Obviously, like so many things these days, it's in the best interest of therapists to perpetuate and promote more and increasingly complicated therapy!
‘This is nor a democracy - it’s a dictatorship” classic. We had one TV and when dad came back from work, without a word he switched the channel to the news. Irrelevant if you were right at a cliffhanger in your favourite show 😂 that’s just the way it was. Going back to the 70’s
My kid farted in another kids face IN CLASS. Much to my frustration, that kid did not punch my kid in the face.
😂❤❤❤❤
My daughter was diagnosed with adult ADD. She went to law school and could have taken more time on her law board tests etc. I urged her to do so! But she refused. She passed. Actually, that's the best outcome. She was right. I was wrong.
Good for both of you! You for supporting and encouraging your daughter; her for being independent. ❤
Celebrate good therapists to counteract the bad. My wife is a licensed professional counselor with a focus on school counseling. This was a rigorous three year Masters program, not some one year degree. In most states you are required to complete undergraduate before pursuing school counseling. She is also a faithful practicing Catholic and soon to be a mother of two. Can’t wait to see the good she does for the kids at her new school.
Im here for this conversation AS A FATHER... Lets go.
Abigail is such a great person. I love hearing her speak.
I love hearing Candace Owens speak even more, but Gentle Ben won't allow that, will he?
@@TheTranceCartel go cry. Candace is occasionally right but she is first and foremost a drama chaser and you are too based on the fact my post had zero to do with that yet you felt the need to stir the pot for no reason. The level she is constantly infighting with her own party is why we are so divided. It's truly embarrassing for conservatives to be wrapped up in all this. The tactics she imitates are those used on the left which is why the left is so embroiled on every issue. But remember Candace came from the left so it's really no surprise she is using identical isolation tactics. Ana Kasparian is going through this right now because she would not agree with how the left is talking about crime. And if you look at other political commentators it's working other channels are joining in on this division she has fostered.
I feel like I should end this by saying before I was so rudely interrupted because again my post was about Abigail yet your drama chasing ass had to make it about something completely unrelated. Kick rocks.
Having been a teacher for 20 years, and now having gotten a degree in counseling, this whole discussion really reverberated with me. Early on in my career, more/most parents were willing to tell their kids to grow up, shake it off, rub some dirt in it, and yes, smack the kid around if it was needed. Those kids were the most well rounded and respectful kids. Now there are parents like that, but they are a dwindling population. More parents, especially moms, want to be their kid's friend, or mom doesn't want dad to use their rightful authority over the kid! These mothers helicopter around nitpicking every little thing and stymie the growth of their kid. I've been the one to tell the kid and the parent, too bad and no. I've had to be the grown up for both of them!
I've taught kids labeled ODD (that label triggers me hardcore😅). You know what these kids rarely got? Spanked. Parameters. They were allowed to throw the bowl of Mac n cheese. They were allowed to have the tantrum and the parents caved. It was taught that if they're violent enough, they get what they want, and they bring that belief into the school, and their IEP further allows them to act out!
I'm old school. I still tell folks no. I tell parents to deal with their kids because they are the parent. When they ask ME how they should parent, I ask them how do they discipline, or do they? Set parameters and stick to them and if their kid doesn't, have a consequence. But parents are scared, especially of getting in trouble with authority figures, like teachers. If I am told by a student that they are/were spanked, my response is always "good", or if a parent tells me they discipline their kid, I give them a high five! They IMMMEDIATELY relax, because they expect me to disagree or taddle! I definitely could go on, but this comment is long enough. I'm going to get her book and refer parents to it whenever they do ask me how to parent.
Therapist here! When parents bring me a troubled kid, we do family therapy. I can't fix in one hour a week what you break every day. Psychoeducation related to parenting is the focus.
I have to admit- this is spot on! My youngest daughter (14) was diagnosed with autism at 3. She was VERY delayed as an infant and toddler, and this made sense. Fast forward: My 16-year-old recently started referring to herself as being autistic. I corrected her and told her she was not and shouldn't even be saying this, especially without a diagnosis! Well, Miss Smarty-Pants whipped around and said “ My therapist told me that I absolutely do have autism and ADHD and that it's ok for me to express it. Oh, and Dad is definitely autistic as well (she said this because we have 3 kids together, 1 is autistic- and he had 3 more with his current wife, first born were twin boys (10) who are also autistic. Though, if you ask me, I think they are just fricken wild children who are completely out of control 🤦🏻♀️). I emailed this therapist demanding to know why she gave my child a diagnosis over a video chat after only having 3 30 30-minute chats with her- and not properly going through testing!
She said: “It's my professional opinion that she is autistic and I like to be open and honest with my patients”.
Unbelievable
Wow! The therapist sounds like a moon-eyed space case.
why are you allowing your kids to talk to random cowboy shrinks?
Daily Wire has obtained a gag order for Candace Owen’s. Multiple main stream news outlets as well as social media profiles have come out and talked about it.
“The arbitrator granted the gag order to take effect, barring Owens from further calling for a debate or suggesting a debate would reveal the company’s “priorities,” according to the newsletter. She is further barred from uttering any statements that could disparage the Daily Wire or Shapiro.”
Ben Shapiro is a scared clown who acts all high and mighty until his feelings get hurt by other conservatives who don’t agree with him.
The problem in the mental health field is a few things. They changed the DSM around, and we are in a time of soft diagnosis for youngsters. I have seen a lot of kids who 10 years ago would have labeled as antisocial like behaviors, narcissistic tendencies, sociopathic traits, now they all get slapped on the "spectrum" because it's easier to deal with parents. They don't want to label and treat for severe disorders until kids near later teens.
As someone with a diagnosis I can confirm autism is not an excuse to act like an idiot. in fact, you're probably smarter than average, and so its even worse to do that.
Kids are starving for discipline and structure! They wish they can rely on strong confident parents!
I really enjoy you talking family Ben, Abigail was great. You seem a great dad, loving, strict, clear and empowering. Thoroughly enjoyed this.
I was raised to say yes ma’am or yes sir, please and thank you, and when adults are speaking, do not speak unless directly spoken to. One day at temple I was running around being loud and my aunt told me to pipe down and have a seat. I mouthed off and told her that she wasn’t my mother and I kept running around playing. That night I got home and as soon as I walked in the door my Ima let the belt fly on my butt. She whipped my behind and told me that the following day I would go over to my Aunts and apologize to her for being a loud mouth back talker. To this day, I have not forgotten that lesson and I have become a prudent adult. I listen and think before speaking. It’s lead me to have tremendous success in my adult life in both relationships and my career. Thank you Ima ❤
Physically assaulting people doesn't teach them a lesson. You simply learned that being mean to adults results in physical punishment.
That doesn't grow your intellect; it enlarges your amygdala and you get better at doing what you're told like a drone.
This is why most religious kids are stunted in creativity and ambition. Their entire life revolves around 'following orders' to make their parents happy. All because their parents are living through them due to a plethora of mental disorders.
Ben summed up that conversation pretty well, "Bad Therapy available everywhere."
Ben, I’m glad you said a child should go into another room. We had a corner for them to sit and think about what just happened and then we talked to them after an appropriate period of time.
My message: Don’t send them to their room, that’s a fun place to hang out for most children.
I would say don’t punish them in their bedroom too because it’s suppose to be a place where they remember that is happy and calm and ready for sleep . I think bedrooms shouldn’t be playrooms too . Sleep is so important that that room should be for sleep and sleep only if at all possible . It shouldn’t be cluttered with toys maybe just 2 that get placed away at bedtime ..
Watched this, this morning. Love it! Anecdotal evidence about fathers being the authority figure. My husband is an EMT/firefighter. We traditionally always have dinner together as a family, he does his best to be there. Last night, first night in a long time, Dad was absent. My 8 year old precedes to complain about dinner, this is over cooked that is too mushy etc. Then demands that I make him something else. I respond that I will absolutely not make him anything else, this is what is for dinner and he had better eat it, furthermore he would never dream of behaving this way if his father was home. He looked at me and I swear he muttered, "You're right ". He then ate everything on his plate with no more complaints. Dinner proceeded as normal and pleasantly. Don't give in and lay down the law friends!
Adult people, as well as kids, try to live up to expectations. I had to walk to school in KINDERGARTEN.
Thank you Ben! great job and a great guest
Lmmfao i tell my 3 and 4 yr old to shake it off youll live every day!!!!
My child rearing practice was benign neglect. I once took the training wheels off my grandson's bike while he was in my care. He didn't need them anymore and they were interfering with his ability to keep up with the other kids. He fell down and skinned his knees a couple of times but he was a proficient bike rider by the end of the day. My daughter-in-law was furious with me.
These conversations need to be at least 3 hours long; there is often so much to say and unfortunately so much goes unsaid and unexplored.
Great conversation... thanks, Ben!
I still respect my parents and have never answered them back. My mom is 98 and is totally healthy. She states what it was like for her as a child and it was all respect and doing what your parents said of being punished but they rarely ever had to get punished as they did what they were told
I had a gifted choir director who escaped the 'Rock Star' world when she saw its dangers. She had two beautiful, musically gifted daughters and a very gifted son. Trying to pretend I knew anything about raising children, I opined that sports is probably a good outlet for girls when they just need to be with other girls. In a low voice she said, No, you tell them what they don't want to hear, and then you keep telling them. On a lighter side, she once confided that, when her arrogance bubbled up, her usually quiet husband would sternly say "Woman!"
So many powerful but simple assertions that we need to hear right now. I would push back on one idea; that schools are denying parents the ability and/or autonomy to parent their kids. While many educational ideologues have reshaped the roles and responsibilities of schools and applied a hyper-attentive approach to kids mental and emotional health, many parents have willingly surrendered their ability and responsibility to discipline and set boundaries for their own kids. As a high school teacher,I have had too many conversations with parents where their response to my concerns about their kid’s behaviour is “I don’t know what to do with him/her anymore” or “What should I do?”. My job is to teach your kid the curriculum, yours is to be their parent.
"My job is to teach your kid the curriculum, yours is to be their parent." That's exactly right but some schools try to take over the parents' role too. We experienced school telling us that we should feed our child both breakfast and supper alone in the car while traveling to and from school. We experienced them telling us what books to read to our child, which we refused. The straw that broke us was them telling us our child had to go to school sick. We then homeschooled and life was sooooo much better. Government school was miserable.
Uncoachable kids become unemployable adults. Weak parents don’t create just weak kids but also the overly entitled “touch me and I’m calling CPS” type kids who have their parents hostage.
I was on a train recently when a young father got on with his 18month-2 yr old. Instead of taking him by the hand and sitting him down ready for their train journey, the father asked, "Where do you want to sit?" The kid proceeded to then run up and down the stairs of the carriage, the father following like a puppy dog . Then the kid discovered the button that opens doors between each carriage and pressed it, and the last I saw of them was the kid pressing buttons and going from carriage to carriage with the dad following.
This is now the fourth or fifth interview. I've heard with this woman and she brings up some really great points. And I'd like to point out that We have become a society that "won't let it go" Or wisely choose our battles. Which kind of interplays with resiliency, but these are important idea is as well.... I think this specifically as it's been promoted throughout the culture has put us in the position of unable to have open discourse... Sometimes you have to let how you feel go and roll with the facts.Sometimes the other way around, but there's no discernment.Because there can be no stoicism, no separation, and no control of emotion... Realistically that is emotional intelligence, realizing that your emotion may not be realistic, and you may need to reevaluate your map of the world. In order to do that, you cannot be fully consumed by your emotion or fully consumed by fact. The truth lies somewhere in between Depending on how idealistic you are. The unfortunate reality of the world, it is not idealistic. And it never will be, no matter what you do or what I do.
Teachers are not allowed to diagnose. Against the education act and medically illegal.
They are not, but what she described here does happen. I have heard many, many instances of teachers calling parents and saying "Your child has (fill in the symptom); have you ever considered that they might have (fill in the diagnosis)?" This is especially true with young boys and ADHD. It's completely inappropriate on so many levels.
@Sed_Contra Then those teachers should be reported
@@jacquelinecaulfield8346 Agreed! I'm shocked that they are not. But I don't think a lot of people realize that teachers aren't allowed or qualified to diagnose, although that should be common sense.
@@Sed_ContraIt is common sense.....teachers aren't doctors...
Urgent emergency please join me in prayer for all those affected families children animals dire castropic flooding se texas and north of Houston Texas evacuations ongoing life threatening dire Situations They Desperately Need your prayers please pray for them God bless you all
My friends used to laugh at me with the way I spoke to my two sons from a very early age - I would tell them that "there is an easy way or a hard way", actually speaking to them like little adults. They didn't think they would understand what I meant, but they did. They have both grown up to be well adjusted adults and I've noticed they mirror the way they were brought up with how they treat their own children.
A 8yr old boy at my daughters school is very energetic and screams in defiance at the teachers would refuse to sit still so instead of discipline, they enable him by letting him jump around the classroom while class is in session like a frog anytime he wants. Really stupid.
My child used to wag school and refuse to do school work, and instead of punishing him, they took half the classes off his timetable - specifically the ones he didn't feel like attending or thought were boring or struggled in. He was acting out and they gave him exactly what he wanted. It undermined my parenting because I needed them to back me up and require regular behaviour and they went against me.
Yes, Jesus Christ IS King. However...
As a Christian myself, I find it confusing when fellow believers use saying "Christ is King" as a challenge to a Jew. First, Jesus is love & it sounds very unloving to keep pushing the point. I don't think it promotes the kingdom at all. & Jesus isn't glorified when we participate in this feud.
If you are genuinely concerned about Ben's salvation, pray for him, don't use Christ as a club to attack him. You aren't changing hearts you're promoting division & that is just what the enemy wants all of the time.
If Jesus is a king, why does Candace disobey the nt? See Titus 2 and 1 Tim 4
Why do so many churches “remarry” divorced people? See Luke 16:18.
You can divorce and remarry in various situations. See Mike Winger for biblical explanation of this@@sitresjolie2343
@@sitresjolie2343Christian people behaving in a questionable manner does not call into question the lordship of Jesus Christ. All it does is prove the sinful and imperfect nature of mankind.
Outstanding Mr. Shapiro!
Outstanding cowardice
Abigail is right on the money in regard to mental health in America. There's nothing wrong with these kids, but then they get these labels and it becomes their identity. They begin to identify with their diagnosis and it becomes a life long pattern on blaming an imaginary condition instead of toughing it out. Don't even get me started about psych meds, there's nothing worse than giving meds to someone who doesn't need them.
When I was in school the teachers would smack you with a ruler
Can’t wait for this one.
Omg the ODD diagnosis 😑 I taught a kid that apparently had that, he was pretty misbehaved and it got so much worse once the teachers were told we had to be mindful of his condition. He listened when he was punished he just threw a massive hissy fit the first few times but once we were told that wasn't allowed he did whatever he wanted again.
Most of the time, parents bring their kids to therapy to eliminate problems they caused by their bad parenting.
Jesus Christ died for our Sins according to the scriptures and that he was Buried and he rose Again the third day praise God praying for everyone everyday God bless you all
Amen
Amen
Jesus can't be God if he dies
"He alone is immortal"
Christ is King
But we still sin what's the point of dieing
hey Ben is your wife still a doctor?
No one knows for sure, jeremy boring gag orders his employees
I went through a divorce with the "therapeutic parent" which was one of the issues leading to divorce, and in the court room she actually played the kid is suicidal at my house card and that while he was skipping school at her house, at least he was alive. The judge ruled in her favor. 5 years later he has never had a job and never finished high school.
Teachers in Australia cannot tell a parent their child has ADHD or some other diagnosis.
They can only share with the parent behaviours the child is exhibiting. It is up to the parent do then parent and do the right thing to support their child.
The other thing, is that parents are not proactive parents. They wait until the problem has become too big, then expect the teacher to solve all the problems and go to the teacher looking for solutions.
Then parents try and find an easy way out - Hence, claiming others for their child, playing victim, seeking medication etc.
Being a 70s kid, I think it really started falling apart when they stopped corporal punishment in public school
A child with "ADHD" is sitting in a classroom for 6.5 hours.and they are expected to NOT act like a caged rat? And the teacher thatbisntellingnthose parents, " I think your son could benefit from some "focus" meds." IS NOT A DOCTOR!!! I told a teacher to do his job in a meeting once, my kid isn't a traditional student, that's what that teaching degree is for. This teacher had Dr. in front of his name, so go figure.
It's actually not the a problem with the classrooms. Modern classrooms aren't like that. Kids don't sit for hours at all. But they do need to sit down and listen to instruction. The issue is sitting and listen is a LEARNT behavior and parents don't teach it. They give their kids iPad ect to shut them up so the kids never learns to sit and listen to someone else.
There’s a big difference between just needing to burn some energy and a child who cannot, even for 5 seconds, focus and is continually destructive to everyone in the room.
Kids need rules. Just like adults.
This was a terrific conversation! Thanks so much for all that you do!
Perhaps America has been TOO successful? Maybe kids have too much free time to ponder their feelings. When I was young I was poor and too busy working my ass off for all that. I (literally) broke my back on a sod farm loading sod onto a flat bed. I del. Det. Free press at 4 am in sub zero weather from 10-13 yr. old. Shoveled snow, mowed lawns. Plus I played outside.
She's mentioning all these things that are good for kids like allowing them to do things that are a little dangerous, giving them a little bit of freedom here and there, letting them struggle and fail... All of these things come straight out of gentle parenting! A gentle parent will not intervene just because their kid is having a struggle, what we will do is talk them through the struggle, teaching them how the struggle is part of life, sometimes it is the struggle itself from which we learn
Gentle parenting is a joke that makes the parent feel better about doing nothing. If you aren't constantly reminding kids of rules and enforcing rules every single time, then you set your children up for failure. No one wants to work with someone who had a gentle parent. Those kids become narcissists.
You do not understand what gentle parenting is. Please read a book by Janet Lansbury on the topic.
I reinforce more rules and say no more times to our kids than all the people who make fun of gentle parenting because they don't understand what it actually is. My kids have more boundaries and rules than the typical and I follow gentle parenting to a tee.
Gentle parenting does not mean that they get to make any rules, it does not mean that I say yes to everything, and it does not mean that I validate every single emotion or feeling that they have. That is not what gentle parenting is. People who think that don't know what gentle parenting really is.
If they scream or throw a tantrum, they do need to leave the room. But instead of just blindly telling them they get a time out, we explain to them that we are not going to let them terrorize other people in the family, they don't have a right to do that, and when they are ready to talk to us reasonably then they can come back.
If they don't want to eat what we've served for dinner, we tell them that's unfortunate, we understand that they don't want it right now, but that's what's on the menu and nothing else is. We simply recognize to them that they don't like it, and tell them that there are things in life they just aren't going to like. People seem to think that acknowledging how they feel means I have to then change my behavior. I don't. I stick with the plan. And I tell them they have to stick with it too. It's the way in which I tell them they have to stick with it that's different.
Interestingly, everywhere my kids go I am told how they are the most well-behaved. They know manners, they know boundaries, and they know how to respect other people.
The flip side to that is they can be the opposite one at home. But that's because we are their safe place where they can let go at the end of the day after they have carefully regulated themselves at school. We get all their emotions and all their feelings. The good, the bad, all of it. That's because we're family and we're there for them through all of it.
If my kids falls down and gets hurt, I say, yeah, that hurts! And you will be fine when XYZ happens, until then Daddy will be here to hold you come and get a Band-Aid, whatever it is that they need.
Because you wouldn't look at an adult after they broke their leg and say it's okay you're fine. Because they're not fine. To say they're fine when they're not is absolutely asinine. I tell them they will be fine. I tell them they will get through it.
So please, everyone who wants to bad mouth gentle parenting, only do so after you've quoted an authoritative source on it. Because everything you are saying about gentle parenting is not at all what gentle parenting is.
Gentle parenting done right can absolutely work for gentle kids. I use a big chunk of the rulebook from gentle parenting for my kids, but it's not some perfect strategy that works for every single child. My friends kids will look at me like I'm stupid or laugh at me if I talk to them like my own children. They need a firm hand or they absolutely won't listen.
@@kelsilevell9551 I wonder how much of that depends on whether or not the parent uses gentle parenting from the beginning.
My nieces can be holy terrors at times. I have actually used gentle parenting on them when we have had them and they calm down quickly and talk to us and we work through problems together.
So they have not had gentle parenting from birth, and still don't except when they are with us. But it works with them.
And I don't mean to say that gentle parenting is the way to parent! I do mean to say that anyone who is going to say that gentle parenting is absolutely awful, or has kids ruling the roost, does not actually know what it is. Many people talk about how people who gentle parent just let their kids do whatever. That's not at all the truth! And seriously, we definitely let our kids do significantly less, and are far stricter than the parents I know that don't use gentle parenting. We have rules, boundaries, consequences, etc.
We don't use timeouts, but I will make any child who is dysregulated, throwing a tantrum, hurting others, yelling, etc, leave. And if they don't leave on their own (rare that they do, but we give them the first opportunity so they will hopefully eventually learn to remove themselves as they mature), I will take them to a place where they are safe from themselves and others are safe from them, usually their room. It's functionally similar to a time out, but it's a little different. They are allowed to come back the moment they can regulate themselves.
I use the word "timeout" to get my kids' attention. Just like in a game. I said that in front of my niece and apparently she freaked out and was crying to her grandmother. Turns out she thought I was putting her IN a timeout. So, using respectful parenting, I went to her, apologized, explained that we don't use timeout in the way she does at home, and that I just needed everyone to stop and listen to me. I told her she did nothing wrong. She immediately stopped crying and hugged me and went back to playing. Respectful parenting is mostly about being honest with kids and treating them like you're raising them to be good adults who do the right thing because they should.
When my kids say “that’s not fair” I say “Life isn’t fair. Get used to it or you’re gonna have a tough time.”
I could listen to Abigail for hours, she is wonderful
People, please keep to the topic. Other comments go on video pertaining to other topics. Thanks.
The topic is Ben Shapiro right? I think "coward" goes with the topic quite nicely.
@@_shadownotes_
No, the topic is effective child-raising, something that your parents needed, apparently.
@sitresjolie2343 I'm a well adjusted adult. I think my parents did just fine. Too bad Benny boys didn't teach him not to be two faced. Bad parenting there.
Hiding comments I see. What a coward.
Well, I see them, so "if he's hiding them, he's not doing a good job."
Yup, he just deleted my comment just now lol, Ben Ben
He call himself a hero and spokesman of Democrat lol, he even talk so much about freedom of speech. Funny
Think that fraud would care? They have a mind set.
@@innerspiritgenkiYT does it all the time as well. You have to disguise words and substitute letters with symbols. Or they vanish as fast as you can refresh.
Also it can often distract from any actual issues the child may have. I have had severe OCD since I was a young child, but was always just diagnosed with anxiety and depression. They looked no further, and thus nothing they did actually helped me in any significant way. It just hurts everyone involved.
I’m so thankful to my parents for raising me right. I hated their methods for a few stupid teenage years, but looking back I can see how it made me a much stronger, more confident person than most of my generation z. Raise your kids normally, they may not like you for a time, but I guarantee they’ll be grateful in the long run.
Awesome guest, thank Ben. Will be tuning in. 💜
So many Dice bots on here! 😂
Ben's a coward. Whose Dice?
lol 💯 what the?!
@@_shadownotes_ pfftt go away bot
@@_shadownotes_ and the correct grammar is “Who’s Dice?”
Can you dice it? 🤦
@han1nja I was wondering whose dice he is referring to.
When kids tell me something isn't fair I always ask them who told them life was fair. Life has never been fair and it will never be fair.
When I was bitching and moaning about fairness, etc. my father would ask me "who ever told you you're SUPPOSED to be happy?"
Growing up in the 50s and 60s kids learned early on that you either get tough or die basicly. I was picked on by a neighbor in my class. ...... one night at dinner my dad said you dont have to take his bullshit. Get mad and take care of it!! Otherwise your gonna be unhappy when your older!
He was a very wise dad. I called the neighbor out on his bullshit and we fought to the point where my little sister ran home and told dad i was killing the neighbor!! Pops came up to the park and pulled me off the neighbor!! He was beat up bad! He took a few years worth!! The neighbor was in my class till high school . We never talked again till we were adults. When we saw each other visiting our parents i would just say Hi.....but no more!!
Pops died last year at almost 90 years old. He told me he felt bad at the time for the neighbor but he never bullied anyone again. And he was glad i didnt kill him!! I am still pretty passive but when pushed i have a breaking point when it becomes a take no prisioners scenario. Only had a few brawls in my time and i do warn folks they should walk away before they regret their actions!! I have never been in trouble with the law!! Thanks Pops!! 😊
May his memory be a blessing.
Christ is King. If you consider saying that as antisemitism I’d love for you to try to explain that one.
It is Jew-hatred if you use the phrase to harass an observant Jewish person.
It is Jew-hatred if you repeatedly say it, not because you care about someone’s eternal soul but because you are about to be fired for cause from your job and you want to have a false excuse to feed to your followers so they will harass an observant Jew on your behalf.
If Candace Owens is so holy, why does she disobey Christian teachings in Titus 2 and 1 Tim 5?
BTW, are you Catholic? Candace is. She prays the rosary, which includes dozens of prayers to Mary. She must follow the teachings of Pope Francis. She believes that a wheat-flour wafer is the literal body and blood of Jesus.
Isn't it funny the way you guys keep saying that to a Jew? Targeted harassment does seem a little anti Jewish to me. PS: Christ was a Jew.
The Greek NT is Anti-Jewish. Christian Eschatology is Anti-Jewish and FALSE. Jews and Muslims hate Paul. jesus was a Pharisee who was killed by Rome. Martin Luther was a vicious, genocidal Antisemite.
Imagine putting a gag order on one of the most honest women in conservative politics because you know you can't win on merits.
Imagine signing and then VIOLATING a MUTUAL NON-DISPARAGEMENT AGREEMENT.
Imagine supporting conspiracies about rabbis drinking Christian blood.
Imagine believing whatever news you read first thing even though Owens said she could “neither confirm nor deny” whether a gag order had been issued.
They know they would lose a debate.
@@Ponzupacket and they are taught that debate is a tyrannical trap. There are 'mentors' out there who have a dear price to pay for that insidious lie.
Do you know first-hand that the alleged order exists? Or are you just spreading rumors?
As for Candace, she prays to Mary and believes that Pope Francis is infallible. She also leaves her small children in order to pursue fame in violation of Titus 2 and 1 Tim 5. Do you support that?
Give it up. Candace is a fraud and a bigot. Go chase her elsewhere. She's not entitled to a large check from a private company forever. No one cares anymore. Move on.
Excellent interview! I don't even have kids and I find this fascinating.
What happened to the days when people respected their parents and eleders?
How does Ben get so few views on his videos with 6.86M subscribers?
Because he's alienating his audience with his cowardice
pfft
How do you feel going about your daily life in the knowledge that you’re a complete hypocrite?
@@han1nja
Jesus (the dead Rabbi) died for their sins, so they can bully Jewish people, ✡️❤️
@@_shadownotes_
Shouldn’t you be committing idolatry somewhere? Go kneel in front of a statue with Candace.
And here I thought you were a true American .
?