The Affair of the Poisons • Puppet History

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  • Опубліковано 22 лис 2024

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  • @moderatelyerika05
    @moderatelyerika05 3 роки тому +1818

    The Professor saying that “he doesn’t know Shane” as if they’re not flatmates 🙄

    • @CindyRubyCutie
      @CindyRubyCutie 3 роки тому +127

      Oh my god, they were flatmates...

    • @Reggie_la
      @Reggie_la 3 роки тому +51

      And they were roommates

    • @makemyearfquake
      @makemyearfquake 3 роки тому +2

      Ikr

    • @PuppyLove2468
      @PuppyLove2468 3 роки тому +11

      @@Reggie_la Oh my god, they were roommates.

    • @alanna6034
      @alanna6034 3 роки тому +3

      @@CindyRubyCutie oh my god they were flatmates

  • @bellebourke5758
    @bellebourke5758 3 роки тому +5663

    "Watcher Entertainment does not approve of the Professor's vaping habit and hopes that you'll keep in mind that he is a nasty little creep whose diet consists of spiders and possibly even dolphin meat." 😂😂

    • @KalEL224
      @KalEL224 3 роки тому +97

      You the real mvp lol

    • @michellepiascik917
      @michellepiascik917 3 роки тому +188

      So now we know that Ryan wrote the disclaimer

    • @deprofundis3293
      @deprofundis3293 3 роки тому +8

      Lol! Can we get a time stamp for replay value??

    • @Larissawesome
      @Larissawesome 3 роки тому +19

      @@deprofundis3293 14:41 :)

    • @wecancreateitall
      @wecancreateitall 3 роки тому +16

      Belle thanks sm for reiterating that disclaimer
      So glad you did, bc lol 😂 it’s funny af!!

  • @gracelien5656
    @gracelien5656 3 роки тому +4020

    “Papa I want a jellybean” was the cutest n saddest shit at the same time 🤣😭

  • @insertcreativenamehere7584
    @insertcreativenamehere7584 3 роки тому +8659

    It just hit me that I’m now thinking of Shane and the Professor as different people. I literally forgot that this is Shane’s show

    • @kaged1productions
      @kaged1productions 3 роки тому +706

      It's funny, because for about half a second I wondered why Shane had never been a guest...😂

    • @hotpinkcrayolas
      @hotpinkcrayolas 3 роки тому +191

      What do you mean? They are different people... x

    • @geared4war
      @geared4war 3 роки тому +226

      Who is this "shame" guy?

    • @anthonybenitez3958
      @anthonybenitez3958 3 роки тому +60

      @@geared4war yea I’m just as confused as you

    • @eoinplunkett3093
      @eoinplunkett3093 3 роки тому +115

      Every co founder has been on the show, Ryan and Steven, but why hasn’t Shane been a contestant

  • @Phantom_Hivemind
    @Phantom_Hivemind 3 роки тому +2721

    Slaughter water is the BEST alternate name for poison I have EVER heard.

    • @radhaiyer98
      @radhaiyer98 3 роки тому +53

      That or Bye Bye Juice 😂

    • @poppy_milkmeltdown429
      @poppy_milkmeltdown429 3 роки тому +40

      AqUa ToFanA

    • @trixx9652
      @trixx9652 3 роки тому +6

      Good name for a metal band too

    • @Lucysurridge
      @Lucysurridge 3 роки тому +8

      @@poppy_milkmeltdown429 Bailey sarian fan? Haha me to.

    • @kl2894
      @kl2894 3 роки тому +2

      Wait... Are you me?

  • @drewa1964
    @drewa1964 3 роки тому +4992

    What people think Puppet History is: A guy messing around with puppets and telling crazy stories about history.
    What it feels like: A cursed immortal puppet overseeing a game show with hopes of finding his lost family again.

    • @Corrupt.p.t
      @Corrupt.p.t 2 роки тому +75

      "Papa I want a jellybean." "The most abominable singing puppet of all!" How will Season 5 be?

    • @parkchimchimstolemyheart
      @parkchimchimstolemyheart Рік тому +1

      L the g out o I-I😢

  • @haleyr7937
    @haleyr7937 3 роки тому +2933

    I like to think that Ryan is forced to take this course with the Professor so he can get his final credits to graduate from Puppet University and the Professor only has contempt for him

    • @katiejane1337
      @katiejane1337 3 роки тому +57

      That scenario hits way to close to home omg 😂

    • @anthonybenitez3958
      @anthonybenitez3958 3 роки тому +52

      Or he’s in some form of hell and cursed to be with Shane doing a stupid puppet show for all eternity

    • @haleyr7937
      @haleyr7937 3 роки тому +13

      Oh my god I love this version

    • @crocsqueen1474
      @crocsqueen1474 3 роки тому +38

      I like to think that winning a round would mean him graduating, but the professor won't allow it bc then he would leave

    • @recoil53
      @recoil53 3 роки тому +8

      @@anthonybenitez3958 Ryan's version of being caught in a kharmic cycle.

  • @joeybuggz
    @joeybuggz 3 роки тому +6049

    i’m always impressed with the amount of fear and emotion you can see in the professor's eyes considering his expression never actually changes

    • @compulsiverambler1352
      @compulsiverambler1352 3 роки тому +79

      Probably the Kuleshov effect.

    • @thebestpilot7
      @thebestpilot7 3 роки тому +186

      @@compulsiverambler1352 nah it was the powerful theatrical enchantment of the genie

    • @MlleFeralMinette
      @MlleFeralMinette 3 роки тому +21

      All about the angles ;)

    • @Emmysn0w
      @Emmysn0w Рік тому +10

      The power of voice acting

    • @wolfiemuse
      @wolfiemuse Рік тому +12

      It’s probably a combination of all these things listed in the comments haha

  • @EthalaRide
    @EthalaRide 3 роки тому +3375

    I love how some Professor/Genie lore was planned and written into one of the question segments, like some sort of mind-blow moment,
    _but that freaking theory of _*_the professor being a human who just keeps eating magic jellybeans to maintain a puppet form_* was just shot out there in the beginning and now It's near impossible to forget.

    • @besthobbit
      @besthobbit 3 роки тому +144

      The subplot of this show is amazing.

    • @cameroncota9844
      @cameroncota9844 3 роки тому +100

      "Papa, I want a jellybeeeaaan"

    • @sincelery5389
      @sincelery5389 3 роки тому +9

      Also the fact that his diet consists of spiders and dolphin meat because he’s a creep

    • @KlaxontheImpailr
      @KlaxontheImpailr Рік тому +4

      Does the professor eat normal jelly beans and poop out magic ones, or does he eat the same ones over and over until they become magic?

  • @BeeBee-ho9ic
    @BeeBee-ho9ic 3 роки тому +5427

    My favourite part is always when Ryan and the Professor quietly threaten each other while the guest is off getting their jellybeans

    • @bettyreads222
      @bettyreads222 3 роки тому +226

      'Little blue bitch' had me cackling! & the hatred I perceive in the Professor's face even though it doesn't change haha

    • @BeeBee-ho9ic
      @BeeBee-ho9ic 3 роки тому +31

      @@bettyreads222 100% agreed lmao

    • @classyhomo682
      @classyhomo682 3 роки тому +23

      I would love if there was a extremely deep backstory to professor

  • @heatherkreucher9249
    @heatherkreucher9249 3 роки тому +3427

    I love how he totally trusted the jelly beans after a WHOLE SHOW about poisoning....

    • @deaddumplings5565
      @deaddumplings5565 3 роки тому +14

      😳

    • @asdjklsadj
      @asdjklsadj 3 роки тому +57

      They only turn you into a puppet and it *possibly* wares off

    • @crablessinbaltimore
      @crablessinbaltimore 3 роки тому +53

      he learned from the best:
      "i'll die for a jelly bean" - ryan bergara, ep 1

  • @MrJjz123
    @MrJjz123 3 роки тому +2184

    can we appreciate how Shane syncs his laughs with the professor's mouth movements

    • @tdsims1963
      @tdsims1963 3 роки тому +154

      I've watched how closely he times the movements to the dialogue. He's quite talented.

    • @richardtherichard26
      @richardtherichard26 2 роки тому +26

      It’s called puppeteering and is kind of the entire point of a puppet show…

    • @vocalvortexstudios2058
      @vocalvortexstudios2058 2 роки тому +118

      @@richardtherichard26 i think they mean that they appreciate he takes the time to puppeteer spur-of-the-moment, sudden unexpected laughter

  • @taylorkichu4683
    @taylorkichu4683 3 роки тому +11584

    We need an episode where the professor is "sick" so we have a shitty substitute. Then have shane as a guest. Then it will be the one time Ryan wins.

    • @annehuntress896
      @annehuntress896 3 роки тому +676

      Keith Habersberger would be a great substitute.

    • @johannadagny6237
      @johannadagny6237 3 роки тому +258

      I genuinely want this as an episode

    • @ghostsprobably
      @ghostsprobably 3 роки тому +409

      the sub should absolutely be kate

    • @Kelly-uw1xr
      @Kelly-uw1xr 3 роки тому +12

      I would love it

    • @caraf8727
      @caraf8727 3 роки тому +37

      How is this not getting more likes?! This is a great idea

  • @marsvilla7128
    @marsvilla7128 3 роки тому +2598

    the professor deserves a raise for also having the job of making me smile each week

  • @foxyjambread3826
    @foxyjambread3826 3 роки тому +1744

    If mugs with 'Slaughter Water' printed on them aren't added to the merch store at some point I'm gonna be severely disappointed.

    • @kanemary56
      @kanemary56 3 роки тому +8

      Agreed

    • @jasonlong8754
      @jasonlong8754 2 роки тому +33

      I'd buy that shit. Mugs, bottles, glasses that say "SLAUGHTER WATER" and a skull and cross bones.

    • @jeremiahgabriel5709
      @jeremiahgabriel5709 2 роки тому +18

      10/10 would buy slaughter water merch

    • @t-rexcellentreviews1663
      @t-rexcellentreviews1663 2 роки тому +7

      @@jasonlong8754 with the Bye Bye Brothers on it as well.

    • @dorcat2867
      @dorcat2867 Рік тому

      It sounds like a drink you can get at Sonics, they have Ocean Water, why can’t they make Slaughter Water too?

  • @jaz1564
    @jaz1564 3 роки тому +2920

    I love seeing Garrick on this show he is such a chill and smiley dude

    • @erikacoffey4872
      @erikacoffey4872 3 роки тому +28

      Same!!! He’s really amazing to listen to in guilty pleasures (a podcast) if you, like me, need more Garrick in your life

    • @leaharmbruster6047
      @leaharmbruster6047 3 роки тому +33

      Him and Kate are a must return on this show!

    • @ONKVP
      @ONKVP 3 роки тому +14

      Ryan clearly enjoys being around him too

    • @yellowcard360
      @yellowcard360 3 роки тому +12

      Yeah! Is it wrong to say I like the shape of his upper lip?

    • @erikacoffey4872
      @erikacoffey4872 3 роки тому +21

      @@yellowcard360 LOL. He is a very handsome man all around, I find!

  • @ElaineMokk
    @ElaineMokk 3 роки тому +16456

    i hope ryan will atleast get the perfect attendance award.

  • @CaliVMK
    @CaliVMK 3 роки тому +1526

    The idea that the Professor is just a human who keeps eating jellybeans is the in my personal opinion the most shocking reveal of the series yet.

    • @ontxtteredwxngs
      @ontxtteredwxngs 3 роки тому +25

      fr and it happened in the first few minutes of the episode, i'm shooketh

    • @dori_casper
      @dori_casper 2 роки тому +18

      it weirdly makes me uncomfortable

  • @joanne01jt
    @joanne01jt 3 роки тому +4068

    Slowed down to read the super fast disclaimer: "Watcher entertainment does not approve of the professor's vaping habits and hopes that you'll keep in mind that he is a nasty little creep whose diet consists of spiders and possibly even dolphin meat" I'm dead.

    • @NoNo-fi3tc
      @NoNo-fi3tc 3 роки тому +197

      So are the spiders and dolphins lol

    • @deprofundis3293
      @deprofundis3293 3 роки тому +21

      Lol! Can we get a time stamp for replay value??

    • @reemahmed6935
      @reemahmed6935 3 роки тому +35

      @@deprofundis3293 it's at about 14:42

    • @reemahmed6935
      @reemahmed6935 3 роки тому +52

      God, the sound of slowed down laughter in the background is giving me chills lmaoo

    • @CalvinKool-Aid
      @CalvinKool-Aid 3 роки тому +26

      I know the spiders but when was it suggested he ate dolphin?

  • @marmarmar615
    @marmarmar615 3 роки тому +1413

    I personally love the lore that the professor is just a human who keeps eating magic jelly beans so that he can stay a puppet

    • @Fundipped13
      @Fundipped13 3 роки тому +43

      I'm also concerned what his human form would look like?! 🤣

    • @jasperj.d.g.4147
      @jasperj.d.g.4147 3 роки тому +46

      @@Fundipped13 he's ancient and Blue, I doubt he would look very good

    • @Fundipped13
      @Fundipped13 3 роки тому +24

      @@jasperj.d.g.4147 I'd be horrified for sure, but I also know the internet has rules... Can't wait for the fanart 😂

    • @jasperj.d.g.4147
      @jasperj.d.g.4147 3 роки тому +8

      @@Fundipped13 eh, after BU the monster fuckers make up a big part of the watcher viewers. He'll get the rule treatment for sure.

    • @whychance9180
      @whychance9180 3 роки тому +16

      Well apparently he is related to the blue man group

  • @Bardic_Knowledge
    @Bardic_Knowledge 3 роки тому +1118

    Fun fact: King's Mistress was an official position in the French court for some time. Reportedly, many King's Mistresses and Queens actually got along well.
    One of these King's Mistresses was Madame de Pompadour.

    • @jenniferm7695
      @jenniferm7695 2 роки тому

      Fun fact she was also shacking up with the 11rh doctor

    • @astridhannestad8323
      @astridhannestad8323 2 роки тому +208

      Kings of other countries started having official mistresses, because the french court was a serious trendsetter. One story is that a king appointed a mistress, showered her with lavish gifts, and proceeded to never touch her because he was fiercely devoted to his queen

    • @vocalvortexstudios2058
      @vocalvortexstudios2058 2 роки тому +90

      @@astridhannestad8323 sounds like a sweet gig

    • @amberparks-newlove6378
      @amberparks-newlove6378 2 роки тому +104

      I'm not entirely surprised the Queen and the Mistresses got along well. Marriages weren't usually about love and more about power moves. Really Mistresses could relate more than anyone else

    • @emilyblack7342
      @emilyblack7342 10 місяців тому +11

      And fun fact about Madame de Pompadour: She was stupid powerful for a woman in politics at the time. Some have said that she was practically a prime minister and was in charge of the King’s schedule. Just to emphasize that, she decided who got to see the head of state and who did not, along with deciding who to promote and who to demote in the government.

  • @theod6267
    @theod6267 3 роки тому +580

    the "papa! I want a jellybean!" moment had me dying

    • @an_earth_angel
      @an_earth_angel 3 роки тому +7

      Is that what he said?? Poor Professor!

    • @sunsun5005
      @sunsun5005 3 роки тому +9

      you weren’t the only one dying

    • @backwardglances
      @backwardglances 3 роки тому +10

      I must know more. Was it the professor? Was it a lost child of his? Who knows...

    • @theod6267
      @theod6267 3 роки тому +14

      @@backwardglances we need more puppet lore

  • @ishouldprobablybeasleeprn495
    @ishouldprobablybeasleeprn495 3 роки тому +1641

    Hot Take: Ryan is the time traveling genie reincarnated who is torturing the professor by pissing him off in his college courses

    • @justarandomchaneldontmindm9098
      @justarandomchaneldontmindm9098 3 роки тому +72

      I'm on board with this take 😂 this class is the professor's personal hell. He is doomed to teach ungrateful students for all eternity

    • @veestallion420
      @veestallion420 3 роки тому +15

      Hold on you’re onto something

    • @kiwigaming09
      @kiwigaming09 2 роки тому +9

      maybe the professor knows it and thats why he makes ryan lose all the time

  • @quinnkelly8601
    @quinnkelly8601 3 роки тому +917

    I love how Shane just seems have gotten really into puppeteering and making puppets and everyone just went with it no questions asked

    • @ellisbuker6191
      @ellisbuker6191 2 роки тому +76

      He actually mentioned in an episode of unsolved that he loves puppets, before this show even started, so I assume his friends just know that it’s one of his interests anyway!

  • @acidstrawberries7667
    @acidstrawberries7667 3 роки тому +804

    I’ll never get tired of the professor referring to himself as beloved lmao

  • @Whymust898
    @Whymust898 3 роки тому +2998

    last season professor backstory: he was cursed by a genie! how whimsical!
    this season professor backstory: he lost his family horribly somehow and he represses the memory but maintains a lingering connection to them through the jellybeans

    • @00muinamir
      @00muinamir 3 роки тому +130

      This tracks with the Professor being a Timelord.

    • @oliviagriffith3626
      @oliviagriffith3626 3 роки тому +69

      The Professor lore continues to get more and more in-depth, and I'm living for it.

    • @hayliew611
      @hayliew611 3 роки тому +11

      Maybe the son got turned into a puppet and died

    • @oliviagriffith3626
      @oliviagriffith3626 3 роки тому +102

      @@hayliew611 My personal (wildly specific) headcanon is that the Professor and his son were an archaeology duo and the Professor's boy "stole" a genie's treasured jellybeans. Now he's being held captive by said genie in one of the many time-periods the Professor has to visit (hence where he gets all this knowledge for the show) to try and rescue him. Of course, genies are wily little fuckers, so that's obviously easier said than done.

    • @dawakat08
      @dawakat08 3 роки тому +21

      Professor McNasty's life is so full of mystery still ugh... lol

  • @justdecaffeinated
    @justdecaffeinated 3 роки тому +641

    garrick: i'm gonna check all of my food from now on
    also garrick: eats the jelly beans as soon as he got them

    • @sabrinaspurzem1672
      @sabrinaspurzem1672 Рік тому +2

      Conclusion: He's not really effective at it but somehow hasn't died yet. Must be the good will of the people. Certainly not his poison probing abilities XD

  • @keelyneumann3814
    @keelyneumann3814 3 роки тому +1811

    "Watcher Entertainment does not approve of the professors vaping habit and hopes that you'll keep in mind that he is a nasty little creep whose diet consists of spiders and possibly even dolphin meat."
    I love it! 😂

  • @ElaineMokk
    @ElaineMokk 3 роки тому +4187

    OMG NOOOOOO "PAPA I WANT A JELLYBEAN!" PROFESSOR'S FLASHBACK FACEEEE. iwanna hug him T_T

    • @thyauthor4749
      @thyauthor4749 3 роки тому +11

      timestamp?

    • @bluechupathingy
      @bluechupathingy 3 роки тому +26

      @@thyauthor4749 7:35

    • @aldenchavez3750
      @aldenchavez3750 3 роки тому +9

      I was gonna comment the same!

    • @uwuzi
      @uwuzi 3 роки тому +92

      i wonder if the professor is papa or the voice who wanted the jellybean

    • @satarupagingerkolay
      @satarupagingerkolay 3 роки тому +57

      @@uwuzi That made it so much darker. Now I want a whole story about this and that too the sound of the one who wanted a jellybean sounds like the crabs, Mari and Gina from the Hotdaga.

  • @morganeb_5300
    @morganeb_5300 3 роки тому +718

    the professor says "gaudin de sainte croix" like the french uncle that smokes 2 packs a day, has never had a meal without meat and will make the cheese go down with 3 glasses of cheap red wine. it's both terrifying yet impressive.

  • @dddakotarose
    @dddakotarose 3 роки тому +640

    I feel like Garrick offhandedly mentioned to Shane that he had a puppet of himself and Shane went, "you son of a bitch, you've done it! your puppet must be featured!!" which is why no one else has been turned into a puppet by the jelly beans simply because they don't have their own puppets and Shane wouldn't want to make them.

    • @MovieEnvy
      @MovieEnvy 3 роки тому +10

      The other jelly beans obvi were not magical, that’s the only reason!

  • @blue_champignon5738
    @blue_champignon5738 3 роки тому +991

    Ryan never winning is just the professor protecting him from cursed jelly beans

    • @hidden-behind-wisteria2701
      @hidden-behind-wisteria2701 3 роки тому +68

      I saw someone comment that since the winner is always replaced, maybe the professor keeps making Ryan lose just so he'll keep coming back

    • @VieSit
      @VieSit 3 роки тому +8

      @@hidden-behind-wisteria2701 Sounds like the beginning of an angsty wattpad one-shot LOL :')

    • @CrazeeAdam
      @CrazeeAdam 3 роки тому +8

      lol. It was a tie too this time. It was 4 to 4. =/ lol

  • @darialappi5762
    @darialappi5762 3 роки тому +541

    I was kinda hoping they'd talk about Guilia Tofana. She murdered at least six hundred men (who were abusive towards their wives) between 1633 to 1651 with her own poison called Aqua Tofana.
    (I did a 15-page report on her and other female serial killers so I wanna see more videos on her!)

  • @danny6801
    @danny6801 3 роки тому +298

    Why did nobody stop to appreciate the Professor's P play? "People peddling poisons and potions to the Parisienne public"? That deserves a chef's kiss.

    • @boobailey4509
      @boobailey4509 3 роки тому +24

      can we not call it p play 😂

    • @squiishiie
      @squiishiie 3 роки тому +4

      pp play 🥵

    • @LovelyIKnowx
      @LovelyIKnowx 3 роки тому

      I literally paused it and commented to my dad that it was some awesome alliteration

    • @Tazzie1312
      @Tazzie1312 3 роки тому +2

      Please never say p play again

    • @MovieEnvy
      @MovieEnvy 3 роки тому +2

      P play sounds like something the Professor does in his private time.

  • @wanna_be_goth1030
    @wanna_be_goth1030 3 роки тому +2222

    Am I the only one who really wants know the lore behind the professor? repressed family memories, encounters with genies and other things I really know how he got here and how his family is doing

    • @siiri8902
      @siiri8902 3 роки тому +101

      All of this lore that's being teased is for sure gonna take several seasons to unfold and I'm very excited to see it!

    • @Ash-ru6bt
      @Ash-ru6bt 3 роки тому +78

      I think the reason the professor doesn’t let Ryan win is because he’s scared he may be turned into a puppet for eternity like him

    • @Lunch_Meat
      @Lunch_Meat 3 роки тому +18

      @@Ash-ru6bt I think Ryan is the genie

    • @rafansyed8420
      @rafansyed8420 3 роки тому +11

      FILM THEORY WHERE YOU AT

    • @deathscore1548
      @deathscore1548 3 роки тому +5

      Bro get MatPat on this

  • @mirrandalynn484
    @mirrandalynn484 3 роки тому +470

    I NEED more of the Professor’s tragic backstory. Was that him as a child? Was it his son? His Nephew? His grandson?

    • @alexlee3261
      @alexlee3261 3 роки тому +41

      I thought it was his son. But now I'm thinking it was him as a child 😱 I need more Professor lore!!

  • @AmethystEyes
    @AmethystEyes 3 роки тому +1278

    Unofficial slogan for the show: “Ryan thanks for tryin’!”

    • @VivaLaGolf42
      @VivaLaGolf42 3 роки тому +10

      We need some Tryin’ Ryan merch

  • @11jokerchen11
    @11jokerchen11 3 роки тому +2113

    "Wait, Bastille is actually a word besides being a shitty band?" I say this with all the love I have in my heart: Ryan is a real life himbo and it's currently the biggest source of joy in my life

    • @sharmbanu9862
      @sharmbanu9862 3 роки тому +133

      i stand by this wholeheartedly. i never thought hearing someone call ryan a himbo would bring me so much joy

    • @emilybarclay8831
      @emilybarclay8831 3 роки тому +250

      He’s like a small himbo, a himbette if you will. A himbito

    • @libbywilliams9969
      @libbywilliams9969 3 роки тому +49

      This is why he never wins

    • @sharmbanu9862
      @sharmbanu9862 3 роки тому +66

      @@emilybarclay8831 HIMBETTE 😭😭😭😭😭

    • @j.pnewcomer1069
      @j.pnewcomer1069 3 роки тому +65

      I think Ryan's too much of a...brat to be a himbo

  • @ArcherOwl
    @ArcherOwl 3 роки тому +201

    After the season 4 finale, I thought it would be fun to go back through the other videos and find out the real scores in each to see if Ryan actually won any. This will be focused on the points won during the questions only, not the extra points the professor gives out willy-nilly.
    Actual Score: Ryan had 4 points and Garrick had 2. Another win for Ryan, he's been winning a lot of these latest ones.

    • @holyshard530
      @holyshard530 2 роки тому +11

      Sooo..does this prove that the system is rigged against him?

    • @LivingMyLife22
      @LivingMyLife22 2 роки тому +2

      🫘

  • @virgiltheghost
    @virgiltheghost 3 роки тому +704

    “The poisoned clothes plan never got carried out”
    *stares in EXTREMELY popular use of arsenic dye in clothing of the later centuries*

    • @vsratoslava
      @vsratoslava 3 роки тому +37

      And wallpaper:)

    • @liriodendronlasianthus
      @liriodendronlasianthus 3 роки тому +37

      Deadly emerald gowns lol

    • @ViVi-ev3rx
      @ViVi-ev3rx 3 роки тому +37

      ahh the reason we think of the color green when it comes to sickness

    • @gracephillips761
      @gracephillips761 3 роки тому +3

      I think he meant never got carried out in that particular instance, not in history in general

  • @EnbyAxolotlOfficial
    @EnbyAxolotlOfficial 3 роки тому +834

    Fun fact: The professor isn't Shane when he eats a bean, Shane Madej is actuay one of the Professors mistresses

  • @lexiarie6545
    @lexiarie6545 2 роки тому +182

    Is nobody going to mention how Ryan didn't know Bastille was a real thing despite it being one of France's biggest national holidays

  • @natkatj
    @natkatj 3 роки тому +541

    if the professor has mistresses, then they're either humans or other puppets, and frankly i don't know which one is worse

    • @kf10147
      @kf10147 3 роки тому +68

      well we know one human who seems interested… shane better keep Sara away from that nasty blue creature

    • @frankensteinlives
      @frankensteinlives 3 роки тому +6

      You misspelled better

    • @Reggie_la
      @Reggie_la 3 роки тому +6

      Anatomically correct dolls and medical props

    • @Squirreltasticqueen
      @Squirreltasticqueen 3 роки тому +1

      There's some d n d inspired muppet show going on with a big tiddy puppet so it works

    • @MissBee13
      @MissBee13 3 роки тому +1

      Both.

  • @JackHammer503
    @JackHammer503 3 роки тому +262

    What we've learned about the Professor this episode:
    1) For sure has a bevy of mistresses (mistressi?)
    2) Has likely poisoned at least one member of his family
    3) Was possibly a former human but can't get enough of those sweet, sweet cursed puppet-jellybeans
    4) Vapes

  • @aubreyjordan8308
    @aubreyjordan8308 3 роки тому +248

    It’s just so funny to me to imagine Shane squishing himself underneath this makeshift stage and screaming in character 😂

    • @dori_casper
      @dori_casper 2 роки тому +4

      he actually sits in front of it

    • @KlaxontheImpailr
      @KlaxontheImpailr 11 місяців тому

      @@dori_casper actually he's hovering above it.

  • @CHESShireCat
    @CHESShireCat 3 роки тому +389

    I like how at the beginning of this show Ryan tried to argue with Shane but now he just has specific beef with the Professor.

    • @Tazzie1312
      @Tazzie1312 3 роки тому +16

      Beef boy's got beef

  • @matrixdefector4344
    @matrixdefector4344 3 роки тому +2352

    Sorry I think it's just so cute to imagine Shane playing the professor and putting on a puppet show for his friends. A history puppet show for adults. It's very cute.

    • @namemycactus
      @namemycactus 3 роки тому +26

      I was just thinking the same thing!!

    • @char_shine
      @char_shine 3 роки тому +58

      This comment really hit me as I watched ryan and garrick giggle as shane made the professor rip a fat cloud

  • @morganrichardson8859
    @morganrichardson8859 3 роки тому +326

    Shane is such a talented puppeteer. Season 3 and I'm still not over it. He has so many skills!

  • @SetFireGirl
    @SetFireGirl 3 роки тому +525

    the resentment in Ryan's eyes when he catches himself laughing at one of the Professor's jokes tho

  • @noof5186
    @noof5186 3 роки тому +491

    does ryan not remember talking about the bastille during the world's most expensive necklace episode? maybe if he paid more attention in class he'd finally be crowned history master...

    • @justalittleturtle5600
      @justalittleturtle5600 3 роки тому +7

      I said something very similar when he didn’t remember the Bastille....

    • @ellarasei4404
      @ellarasei4404 3 роки тому +4

      That episode was over a year ago so I don't blame him for forgetting

    • @blueblank8287
      @blueblank8287 2 роки тому +1

      The Professor, With Barely Concealed Judgement: It’s a nOTORIOUS PRISON

  • @EienNiKenJa
    @EienNiKenJa 3 роки тому +73

    Between the Professor taking a vape break, and the Beastie Boys inspired song at the end, this is my favorite episode so far.

  • @kristineh8309
    @kristineh8309 3 роки тому +898

    I think we need to take a moment to appreciate that Shane got “Sierra Mist” and “blinker” into a song.

  • @ChernaOvce
    @ChernaOvce 3 роки тому +482

    "If you have a minor beef with someone consider maybe going out for hot dogs and talking it out. Don't poison."
    I wonder if this is a callback to those airport hot dogs that gave Shane food poisoning....

    • @an_earth_angel
      @an_earth_angel 3 роки тому +7

      Watcher secretly supports poisonings, DUN DUN DUUUUN

    • @sunsun5005
      @sunsun5005 3 роки тому +2

      Deep cut

    • @gillyweedniharry
      @gillyweedniharry 3 роки тому +7

      Nah, it's probably just a throwback to the hotdogga saga

    • @johanvajse8410
      @johanvajse8410 3 роки тому +1

      Ryan & Shane also went for hot dogs in Tourist Trapped
      plus Shane has mentioned his love for the 4th of July when he could eat a lot of hot dogs

  • @TheMewtata
    @TheMewtata 3 роки тому +396

    I’m sure no one was ever wrongly convicted in this investigation. I’m sure everyone was super truthful, and all of the confessions extracted by torture were totally legit.

    • @caitlinb35
      @caitlinb35 Рік тому +14

      yeah it's giving european witch trials vibes... forced confessions, false accusations and panic through brutal torture

    • @LittleRedWhine
      @LittleRedWhine 10 місяців тому +3

      Yeah, I wish he acknowledged that. The king’s mistress was also very obviously being targeted here in a character assassination.

  • @Vic_the_owl92
    @Vic_the_owl92 3 роки тому +244

    The empty eyes of the Professor as he said "I don't know." Deep inside he knew what could have happened to his family but he can only remember fire.

  • @ScottDavid7
    @ScottDavid7 3 роки тому +917

    "Wait bastille is a real thing? not just the name of a shitty band?"
    oh so we're choosing violence are we

    • @leviathxns
      @leviathxns 3 роки тому +107

      I was personally attacked by ryan's bad opinion

    • @lize-marigrobler161
      @lize-marigrobler161 3 роки тому +8

      @@leviathxns dude same

    • @ledoggo9797
      @ledoggo9797 3 роки тому +7

      @@leviathxns Me too

    • @ScottDavid7
      @ScottDavid7 3 роки тому +5

      @@leviathxns facts

    • @Shadowulf99
      @Shadowulf99 3 роки тому +43

      Ryan, maybe your bad takes on such a great band are why the Professor won't let you win.

  • @shawnabasallo7515
    @shawnabasallo7515 3 роки тому +86

    Every time the song portion begins I am blown away by how talented Shane is

  • @mxrmlt
    @mxrmlt 3 роки тому +806

    we need an online university episode where the professor's computer gets a virus, everything goes haywire, and ryan finally wins fairly

    • @N0noy1989
      @N0noy1989 3 роки тому +17

      Ryan did win one fair and square. But the Professor chose not to announce winners that episode.

  • @averylynas2465
    @averylynas2465 3 роки тому +1231

    i’m supposed to be writing a research paper in biology right now but i can’t miss this

    • @DJLTT
      @DJLTT 3 роки тому +25

      We all must stop what we're doing to watch this the moment it comes out

    • @luciigooseyy
      @luciigooseyy 3 роки тому +17

      same, im literally in class right now but like. puppet history. so,,

    • @EmilyHenthorn
      @EmilyHenthorn 3 роки тому +10

      Me sitting here with an actual history lecture to listen to 😅

    • @luciigooseyy
      @luciigooseyy 3 роки тому +2

      m o o d

    • @maddyyhitch
      @maddyyhitch 3 роки тому +3

      girl I’m supposed to be writing a history paper too but here we are

  • @thatcuriousmiss
    @thatcuriousmiss 3 роки тому +89

    It's so amazing that on the exact same month(July, 1659) Giulia Tofana, creator of the poison of Aqua Tofana, too, was executed in Italy for helping noble women poison their husbands to get out of abusive marriages (presumably).

  • @char5180
    @char5180 3 роки тому +291

    I think my favorite part of these besides the songs is when the guest leaves to get their prize and Ryan and the Professor just trash talk and threaten each other 😂

  • @lycanthology
    @lycanthology 3 роки тому +601

    Everyone talking about potential band names as if the most appropriate one for this whole episode isn’t My Chemical Romance

  • @unknowncreature-0069
    @unknowncreature-0069 3 роки тому +80

    0:58 lol the professor isn't actually being controlled by anybody, shane just eats a jellybean and turns into the professor before they start filming

  • @kaigaron9566
    @kaigaron9566 3 роки тому +1260

    Class: why do you know so many random facts
    Me: *sweats in puppet history*

    • @Phantom_Hivemind
      @Phantom_Hivemind 3 роки тому +15

      Me, but change "puppet history" into "internet", and we good

    • @SnakeEnthusiast
      @SnakeEnthusiast 3 роки тому +30

      Dude, the other day my teacher brought up the Donner Party and everyone was wondering why I knew so much about this cannibalism-caravan. Saying “oh, I learned it from a blue puppet with a satchel full of jelly beans” is a tad odd.

    • @Phantom_Hivemind
      @Phantom_Hivemind 3 роки тому +14

      @@SnakeEnthusiast mood. I wonder how many people will think I'm weird when it comes time to talk about history. Everyone will ask, "why do you know about a golden stool?" "Why do you know about a bunch of people who ate each other?" "How do you know about a French royal member basically playing russian roulette with poison on sick people?"

  • @duckwifboots
    @duckwifboots 3 роки тому +408

    The chemistry between the professor, ryan, and garrick is awesome

  • @jimmorrisonsbelt2337
    @jimmorrisonsbelt2337 3 роки тому +63

    The 'Papa, I want a jellybean' with the Professor having a Bruce Wayne-level PTSD flashback freakin killed me 😂😭

  • @jackroberts2704
    @jackroberts2704 3 роки тому +549

    The Professor: "I don't know who this Shane guy is, but he sounds handsome."

    • @persona8439
      @persona8439 3 роки тому +16

      Its like batman from the lego movies.

  • @JoeyLavarias
    @JoeyLavarias 3 роки тому +191

    "Papa, I want a jelly bean!" - the sentence that will haunt my dreams for an indefinite amount of time.

  • @brooke6658
    @brooke6658 3 роки тому +74

    Honestly this story would make a bomb Netflix show.

  • @shen-qf9mc
    @shen-qf9mc 3 роки тому +192

    we can see that garrick, despite turning into a puppet, was clearly still modeled after his human body. if the professor is actually turning into a puppet by repeatedly consuming jellybeans, this implies that his true form is a hyper realistic giant blue hairy monster, as you do.

    • @susannachi2002
      @susannachi2002 3 роки тому +22

      So, cookie monster

    • @sarahafton290
      @sarahafton290 3 роки тому +30

      it could also be the more times you’re turned into a puppet the less realistic the puppet is.

    • @missybarbour6885
      @missybarbour6885 3 роки тому +8

      Now I want him to be taken off his jellies and turn back into blue-bacca

    • @fluffyfluble429
      @fluffyfluble429 3 роки тому +5

      He is the genie 🧞‍♂️

    • @samanthageraldine7546
      @samanthageraldine7546 3 роки тому

      @@fluffyfluble429 holy shit!

  • @aishwaryanayak4040
    @aishwaryanayak4040 3 роки тому +324

    How did the professor just casually say ' I'm a freak back here?'
    What an icon🙌

  • @AkumakoCross
    @AkumakoCross 3 роки тому +112

    Given that Louis forbade their children from mourning Madame de Montespan, I don't think he was super stoked on the whole "ladyfriend trying to poison him" thing.

  • @estheristoocool
    @estheristoocool 3 роки тому +287

    the professor is keeping all these mistresses and i’m not one of them ? a story of betrayal indeed

    • @Reggie_la
      @Reggie_la 3 роки тому +16

      I know right!? Where do I send in my resume?

  • @franciscoflores5111
    @franciscoflores5111 3 роки тому +987

    Is no one gonna talk about “To-do list: Rawdog the big guy?”

    • @Ali-mv3jc
      @Ali-mv3jc 3 роки тому +8

      @TK Wallace honestly I'm surprised she didn't have more kids!

    • @PoochieCollins
      @PoochieCollins 3 роки тому +3

      @TK Wallace : she was pretty smart; it's too bad her intelligence was used on being a psychopath.

  • @RavenousMillenial
    @RavenousMillenial 3 роки тому +338

    *"Watcher entertainment does not approve of the professor's vaping habit and hopes that you'll keep in mind that he is a nasty little creep whose diet consists of spiders and possibly even dolphin meat"*
    -the disclaimer, in case anyone missed it

  • @jeannareadsbooks8475
    @jeannareadsbooks8475 3 роки тому +141

    History fact! The band Bastille is so named bc the lead singer, Dan Smith's birthday falls on Bastille Day, the french equivalent of Independence Day because it was the day the french people stormed the famous prison and a significant day in the french revolution

    • @treehousekohtao
      @treehousekohtao 3 роки тому +4

      Surprised that professor wasnt more mad about lack of history knowledge...rotten jellybean for Ryan!

  • @partlyironic
    @partlyironic 3 роки тому +366

    The gaps in Ryan’s otherwise excellent knowledge are SO fascinating to me.

    • @hypotheticalforest
      @hypotheticalforest 3 роки тому +29

      Remember when he thought hair grew through the skull 😂

    • @raisa1918
      @raisa1918 3 роки тому +4

      @@hypotheticalforest HE WHAT

    • @hypotheticalforest
      @hypotheticalforest 3 роки тому +3

      @Raisa I think it was in the Edgar Allen Poe true crime episode! but yes. He really thought that 😂

    • @raisa1918
      @raisa1918 3 роки тому +4

      @@hypotheticalforest oh my God, he really is a himbo

    • @shawnasideas
      @shawnasideas 3 роки тому +2

      @@hypotheticalforest that was SUCH a great moment. Shane was like “NOPE!”

  • @SquidandCatAdventures
    @SquidandCatAdventures 3 роки тому +63

    This is the first Puppet History video that I've watched, and I'm loving the idea that the puppet Professor teaches with his own puppets. Also, saw the video with Steven making his "slaughter water" cocktail before seeing this one, and it's just as satisfying getting the reference in reverse.

    • @Nowgivemeyourfries
      @Nowgivemeyourfries 3 роки тому +1

      Me exactly too!!!!! I just watched the TMS yesterday and now I’m watching this!
      This show is so funny, Shane is so talented.

  • @laurenhartsell5358
    @laurenhartsell5358 3 роки тому +552

    Maybe instead of the jellybeans keeping the professor as a puppet, the genie cursed him to his current form and to trick others to gradually join his puppet army by eating the jellybean rewards from these videos. Since Ryan never wins, he could also be the genie overseeing the whole process.

    • @lukestoff5224
      @lukestoff5224 3 роки тому +73

      Maybe the professor likes Ryan and is protecting him.

    • @laurenhartsell5358
      @laurenhartsell5358 3 роки тому +39

      @@lukestoff5224 it would explain why he always hands out the extra beans for the guests and why Ryan gets all the rotten beans

    • @kateancharn4202
      @kateancharn4202 3 роки тому +37

      I love this.... But I think we did see a glimpse of the genie in the Donner Party Ep, and it was.... definitely Shane. Which could spiral into a whole other theory or be changed, but. It's clear that Shane is NOT the professor in the Meta Story, but he could certainly play a role, and there is definitely an important reason why Ryan never wins.

    • @christabelle__
      @christabelle__ 3 роки тому +16

      The Professor has also said he poops jelly beans, and guests are eating his poop....so is he eating his own bean poo?!

    • @Squirreltasticqueen
      @Squirreltasticqueen 3 роки тому +1

      @@christabelle__ if all he eats is jelly beans and he "poops" jellybeans is it really poop

  • @rheanathan4189
    @rheanathan4189 3 роки тому +119

    I love the C-Dogs joke every time, please never stop

  • @EloiseRaeCullen
    @EloiseRaeCullen 3 роки тому +96

    "And now, to strangle you to death, bring out *The Dandy!* "
    I'm deceased now. That line ended me faster than any poison. I'm gone. Goodbye. 🤣

  • @TerrificGiggles
    @TerrificGiggles 3 роки тому +359

    "Are you just a human that keeps eating jelly beans?" WAIT, LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS PROFESSOR LORE--

  • @anxiousemu
    @anxiousemu 3 роки тому +649

    Can I just say, Garrick is so damn handsome ;-;

    • @mirhaik640
      @mirhaik640 3 роки тому +19

      Time to start a fanclub

    • @bluebearii4477
      @bluebearii4477 3 роки тому +21

      @@mirhaik640 GARRICK FAN CLUB!!! VERY HANDSOME MAN

    • @Bisexualdragon4042
      @Bisexualdragon4042 3 роки тому +20

      He's staring in a romance tv show and has a podcast called "Guilty pleasures" pretty sure he has more work out there right now.

    • @Bisexualdragon4042
      @Bisexualdragon4042 3 роки тому

      @@A_T216 Sadly it hasn't aired yet. 🥺 They got the pilot approved tho so that's a win so far

    • @flowerfleur8105
      @flowerfleur8105 3 роки тому +2

      @@Bisexualdragon4042 I hope the best for him, he's one of those people who you can tell are intelligent and nice.

  • @greenapple9477
    @greenapple9477 3 роки тому +89

    Death Chemist sounds like a RPG class, and Affair of the Poisons a title. Slaughter Water sounds like a skill or attack.

  • @jabtrack123
    @jabtrack123 3 роки тому +429

    “Marie” - the name of every French woman during this time

    • @raerohan4241
      @raerohan4241 3 роки тому +15

      Or Louise

    • @Rhysdux
      @Rhysdux 3 роки тому +2

      And some French men as well! For example, Lafayette's full name was Marie-Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de La Fayette.

  • @salsita_verde
    @salsita_verde 3 роки тому +245

    It’s weird how there was a bear question, and the professor didn’t mention Ryan’s irrational fear to bears

    • @msia7201
      @msia7201 3 роки тому +27

      He did, though. 21:30 "Ryan, can you confirm to me your address is still-"
      Meaning he intends to release bears in Ryan's place.

  • @arocknrolldream
    @arocknrolldream 2 роки тому +44

    “I can’t keep track of all these names” and then literally every woman in this story is named Marie

  • @TheNocturnalOracle
    @TheNocturnalOracle 3 роки тому +98

    "Too dark. Here's a puppy."
    Thank you professor

  • @cryptidnit3
    @cryptidnit3 3 роки тому +100

    Omgggg this episode is already ON FIRE! All the band names, “papa I want a jelly bean”, the cartoon villainy of all the poison schemes. C’est magnifique!

    • @tdsims1963
      @tdsims1963 3 роки тому

      And the historical story is TRUE. Madame de Montspan was quite the character. She more or less FORCED Louis XIV into the relationship (he did fall madly in love with her, though, after he discovered that she was a TIGRESS in the sack) and kept him there for decades. She was beautiful, smart, funny, a total bitch, quite amoral at the beginning of their affair but pious and repenting towards the end of her extravagant life.

  • @annmarietorres8578
    @annmarietorres8578 3 роки тому +101

    "C-can I have a point?
    ...
    ...
    ...
    "No."
    I literally cried laughing.

  • @queertyrant7179
    @queertyrant7179 3 роки тому +248

    I hope that when June rolls around, there will be some historical pride episodes, yknow? Lots of lovely history that you don’t hear much about

    • @hydrogen3266
      @hydrogen3266 3 роки тому +10

      My first thought is to definitely do one about the public universal friend (who is now looked at as an early example of a non-binary person) or something oscar Wilde related because I feel like his life was kinda crazy. But I totally agree

    • @SarahWolverine
      @SarahWolverine 3 роки тому +2

      I want to raise one of the many gay, bi & lesbian people of the Harlem Renaissance! The You're Dead To Me Podcasts about some of them were wild already, now imagine what Shane would do with that!

    • @unclewiley1986
      @unclewiley1986 3 роки тому +1

      @@hydrogen3266 Even his last words were iconic “This wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. Either it goes or I do.”

  • @joeybaity6911
    @joeybaity6911 3 роки тому +153

    Strangled by the Dandy was a great debut album from Slaughter Water.

  • @2gxssedyt294
    @2gxssedyt294 3 роки тому +33

    "Papa I want a jelly bean" that voice had me dying of laughter

  • @demi_lynnx
    @demi_lynnx 3 роки тому +372

    Title: “The Affair of the Poisons”
    My brain : ✨A Q U A T O F A N A✨

    • @burpydude8811
      @burpydude8811 3 роки тому +56

      Shana sha shana sha shana sha sha shana shaaa

    • @JustiredBermzzzz
      @JustiredBermzzzz 3 роки тому +51

      I actually thought the video is about the ✨aqua tofana✨

    • @MissSimone02
      @MissSimone02 3 роки тому +15

      THAT'S LITERALLY ALL I COULD THINK OF TOO!!!

    • @thaisfranca4394
      @thaisfranca4394 3 роки тому +5

      Yeeeeeees

    • @oliviagriffith3626
      @oliviagriffith3626 3 роки тому +26

      Haha, here are the Bailey Sarian fans I was looking for!! We need the Professor to do an episode on ~A Q U A T O F A N A~ for sure!

  • @LannasMissingLink
    @LannasMissingLink 3 роки тому +137

    I love that we could straight up see Shane's entire arms and torso throughout this performance

  • @kamillelang3170
    @kamillelang3170 3 роки тому +16

    Omg at the second Ryan asked the professor if he had a family, it immediately cut to a depressed medicine ad that starts with “I thought I was in control of my depression”. Not a bad response.

  • @jaz1564
    @jaz1564 3 роки тому +249

    so now it is a proven fact that the professor does the nasty and Ryan wasn't lying about the trailer accident in the Q&A omg

    • @christabelle__
      @christabelle__ 3 роки тому +12

      The Professor has talked about how 'his people' have sex before, don't recall the episode though.

    • @dustinb8781
      @dustinb8781 3 роки тому +16

      @@christabelle__ I think it was the last episode with Garrick. He said dirty talk when he meant to say trash talk

    • @espressoghoulette
      @espressoghoulette 3 роки тому

      which Q&A? o.o

  • @emily-ly4te
    @emily-ly4te 3 роки тому +161

    The Professor: [pointing at Shane] I've never met this man in my life

  • @gempizza6425
    @gempizza6425 3 роки тому +66

    So um...i'm gonna need an album of all the songs that are performed at the end of these puppet history episodes

  • @HS-lo8ex
    @HS-lo8ex 3 роки тому +161

    Didn't the professor mention the Bastille prison in a Season 1 episode? No wonder Ryan keeps losing