Cheating When To Forgive and When To Move On
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
- This is such a tough decision to make. The truth is there is no easy answer. Sometimes its worth fighting through the hard times and other times you should let go and move on. Here are some tips to help you make that decision.
When you forgive the cheater and take them back you're basically giving them a free pass to walk all over you once again. A liar is a liar. Life is too short to waste your time on back stabbers.
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That’s not true, you make dumb mistakes when you’re young
Good luck on finding the perfect person! They don't exist. We all do mistakes in life. We all deserve 2 chances!
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she told me she wont do it again
but damm
how can u do something like that with others when u love someone else
i think i have to stop being a nice guy
cuz people think u are dumb when u are nice
Alterate Awful this hits home bro
My wife tells me “what, I have told you I’m sorry”
Alterate Awful I did cheated on my ex - bf. But sometimes it is really true when I mean I won’t do it again . And I am not doing it anymore . Give only one chance and wait and see
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I forgave my cheating X the first time, but she did it again a couple months later. That was the deal breaker and I never contacted her again. I think she was a serial cheater because she went on to cheat on several more men and is now single for life. Chaulk it up to an incurable character flaw.
No cheater is worthy of forgiveness. The cheater is nothing but trash. Male or female.
Good luck on finding the perfect person! They don't exist. We all do mistakes in life. We all deserve 2 chances!
@@bbyoung8429 i agree with u 💯 👌
@@janettegonzalez4788 They do exist. I was cheated on many times in past and thought the same as you but that is just an excuse for cheaters to cheat more. Me, friends if friends, my husband, all are loyal and never cheated. There are many good people out there. Cheating is a choice, not a mistake!
Only selfish and immature attention-seekers cheat because a real mature woman or man has balls to walk out of a relationship and stand his own ground to finish it as an adult.
I suppose all are capable to cheating -- but the difference to restoration is the attitude after being caught. Someone who cheats and shows no remorse? Someone who cheats and continues to gas light your "problems". They no longer care.
No we are not all capable of cheating
@@2009Andersenthat’s your opinion they stated there’s even saying I suppose but apparently only you know the definite answer with a straight no 🤣egotistical much? Try being emotionally mature I can see your trying since your watching this but…. Be real your egos not gonna let toy
For me, the issue is that I didn't sign up to monitor someone else's behavior. I'm not going to ask questions, lie awake wondering, check your phone or emails. That's not why I'm in a relationship. I'm not going to be a cop. I have more respect for myself and my own time. Secondly, if you're having sex with other guys, you're not behaving in a way that is consistent with behaving in a loving, respectful way that adds to the relationship. I'm not going to stand in your way either. If that's what you want to do, go do it - but without me. I'm not hanging out in that.
Well said.
Exactly what I am feeling. A relationship is supposed to bring peace and be joyful. Not the person that was abused has to do all the work. Too risky for someone that lied and lied just to fulfill their own selfish needs. Especially when they made you believe things weee amazing and you believe you were both happy.
What about emotional cheating? There was not physical interactions. There's no easy answer.
There are many people who make mistakes, people make them while they know it’s wrong, others just do things like it was a small bite of the cake. There are many who cheats. But there are also many who really take the pain and try to do everything well again. Better, much better - few see it as losing a family member because in the end you/they may realize that "fuck I was stupid"
What I'm trying to say is; you may see the person or yourself making the same mistake. Or you can see the person get better than you - or you get better. Never lose hope because time will get better
Thank you
thank you, i never thought that i would need this, 😞
thanks Marc
Anis Ariana Anis melayu ke
Skip to 2:15
If they cheat they don't respect you. Move on.
The devil is in the details. Can you live with the knowledge? Should you leave and live with the regret of giving up? Can you trust them again? Do you want to punish? Can you move on? Can you consider an open relationship?
Will I regret giving them up, hell no. And I always punish people who betray me. Vengeance is a lifetime long commitment for me.
I feel like i am reading a book when i listen to u Marc. You're so articulate.
Aww thank you adam :)
Wow. Your business analogy was spot on. My husband of 28+ years cheated on me again (at least the 4th time that I know of, but suspect more).
It is hard to separate the emotions from the event, but I’m learning that emotions aren’t facts, just feelings. I wish I could have heard your message 20 years ago and made the correct decision. Thought I was “doing the right thing for the kids.” Another piece of bad advice-my kids have been devastated and are suffering with emotional and relationship issues themselves because of it.
Hope this message gets out to many, many more people.
Would you have a problem if I paraphrased, giving you all the credit, and posted on social media platforms?
You can’t blame yourself because you were ignorant to the knowledge because as soon as you found out you’re actively working on it! So your doing the right thing and obviously realized kids would rather come from a “broken home” than an abusive chaotic unpredictable home and will thank you when they’re older I sure did. But they’re too immature to grasp that unfortunately. And most ppl make that same mistake thinking they’re helping they’re kids when they’re really doing the opposite I admire your courage
please don't let the volume of ppl discourage you. I love you and if one person keeps you going I hope that's me :)
Cheating can also be a symptom of larger problems.
Marc.. I looked for you on youtube and was not able to locate you
Watch videos of so many couples who have reunited after an affair. And have gone forward to have a better relationship than before. Why did your boyfriend cheat on you is very important that was missed out on in this video. Maybe there was a gap in your relationship or maybe he's a cheater by nature. If the second is true then it's better to leave the relationship. But if the first is true then you need to analyse your relationship and if he has expressed reasonable reasons and is willing to work around the problems.. you have the chance to rebuild the relationship with full trust.
I only cheated once to get out of the prison cell. Reading these hateful comments and this is my story: I cheated on my ex boyfriend because he was ghosting me for the last month of our relationship. That month basically consisted of him rarely answering my texts and never finding the time to meet up with me again. I think the catalyst was that we almost got caught in bed after his family (we were 18 so he lived at his parents’ house) came back home earlier than anticipated. And his sister found an open condom package on the table. He was closeted btw and not ready at all to stand up for our relationship (something that I definitely was.. My dad even made me go to a psychologist because I told my parents that I was in a same sex relationship. Obv I was ready to commit). So I found myself in this stagnant place where I couldn’t reach or contact him in any way. And because I felt like I needed a bulletproof reason to break up with him I decided that cheating was going to be the bomb that was going to demolish the prison. He held the keys but never gave them to me. And that was the one and only time I cheated.
You're not a terrible person for doing that. While cheating is probably the most hurtful thing a person can do to another, I think that you had some legitimate reasons for feeling unappreciated & the need to move on from a bad relationship.
@@sarahjanedhel1556 Yikes, no, hell no. There's no excuse for cheating. If that person felt unappreciated, there was no prison he had to break out of. He just had to get out of the relationship. He was out for petty revenge. If this person is justifying cheating, they will do it again.
@@saintejeannedarc9460 it all feels the same to me anyway. Whether someone cheats, or they quickly break up so that they can sleep with someone else. They wanted to either way...
I just think if someone's going to do that, they better not try get back with the original person.
@@sarahjanedhel1556 Have you actually been cheated on? I was after an 11 year relationship and nothing ever hurt like being cheated on. Break ups can be rough, but nothing even close to being cheated on.
A cheater justifying they’re selfish act instead of seeing their own faults and taking accountability like an emotionally mature adult would can only lead to one conclusion you will cheat again since you can’t even put your big girl panties on like the rest of the world and own your actions instead your blaming the victim like a coward you didn’t leave him why? Cuz maybe you wants the best of both worlds you had the choice to leave but selfishly didn’t and chose to cheat own it
Lousy advice. Forgiveness is overrated. Why do I need to forgive in order to move on. I can move on and not forgive.
Michael Campbell yeah but you will only cause yourself further pain.
Laura Ellen Smith No you won't. Out of sight out of mind!
How will you move on if you can’t forgive?
My girlfriend has cheated on me 4 times and I forgive her… and she’s still cheating on me without any remorse.. I love her so much and it hurts a lot to see myself leaving her.. I don’t know what to do. Please someone should help me tell me if I should move on or stay??
You have to sit down and talk to her. Is she cheating with the same person? If yes, she is very much attached to that person. But does she love that person? It could be that she uses that person to the fill the void that she is feeling. This is totally unfair for you. I guess you really have to talk to her about this and come up with an action plan. If you feel that she really loves you, she needs to make an effort to stay away from that other person. I pray for your healing :(
Bro she belongs to the streets wtf😭
love this advice 💗💗💗💗 your such a concerned human being thank u 😊
Nothing is bether than coconut oil!
Solid advice.
I think that if someone cheats, there is no trust in the relationship, and I would not continue to be with them unless there were children in the mix. But you are very good at giving advice and seeing both sides of the story!
I found out my boyfriend had a one night stand with another women summer of this year women he met at the bar. I literally just found out this week the full details, I don't feel like I can fully trust him again and trust him with my heart again but I love him and I think we can make it work. I just don't know if it will happen again
Please don't trust him again. I gave my cheater a chance, as we had valid relationship problems for a few years. He just squandered the chance and went right back to the ridiculously young girl as soon as I relaxed a bit. Most of them won't change if they start that.
Cool video but the answer is NO. If a spouse betrays you never ever take them back because whatever you had is long gone & it's not coming back. Show yourself respect & either change the locks & kick them out or pack & leave. It will hurt at first but 1 year down the road the pain will be gone & life will spring anew.
I'm going through this right now. My wife cheated on me and I threw her out of the house the day after Christmas. I then spent 3 days drinking in amounts only an old sailor like myself can. After that, I decided it was best to face my pain totally sober and have been so ever since (almost a month). I don't know the answers but I don't think I will find it in a bottle. We meet at a restaurant once a week to talk. We have been married for 13 years and dated for another two years before then. It's not so easy throwing away a 15 year relationship. Her boyfriend dumped her and she is staying with her sister and would otherwise be homeless.
John Sparks she prob cheated on you because she was lacking vitamin D... were you giving her the D when she cheated? If you weren’t, you’re partially at fault for her cheating. Please give her a chance, I can tell you still love her and be sure to give her at least 2 doses of D a week 🤷♀️
@@brothertn708 The D!!😁😁😁
So did you guys manage to iron things out? It's been 7 months since my wife if 16 years told me about her affair and I still don't know if I want to be with her. This is mental hell.
Helped me alot today! Thanks 🙏🏻
Excellent advice Marc Dylan. Especially giving options.
Marc ur the best....im 4ever on ur channel...love it and huge huge fan of yours. U had me at Hello! Keep it up😑🤘🏻🤘🏻🤘🏻♥️♥️
smart guy... i love the investment bit...
WoW, came across your video, you are great, very articulate in your speaking. If you dont mind me asking, did you mentally prepare for it before or written down your thoughts before or did you just impromptu your response.
Once a cheater, always a cheater.
colin chui not true at all. People can and do change.
Not true
What happens when you’re not a cheater by definition? What happens if yes, you were still being intimate with your ex but he made sure you knew you were broken up?! You planned a date with a man and it lead to sex? I never cheated on him but he sees it as cheating? I didn’t tell him right away and right before we were about to really get back together, I told him! I came clean about all the details (even the ones I’m ashamed of) and yes, it was hard to come clean and I dragged the truth out and for that I’m sorry and regret but now he’s labeled me a “cheater and a liar”. And I’m not those things! I’m really not and I’ve been fighting for him for the last year, regardless of the bullshit! We’ve been together for 10+ years and have a baby together! I only slept with one man while we were broken up and it was traumatizing and I immediately regretted it afterwards! I haven’t been with another man since I was 19. I’m 30! I’m just so lost!
Nice advice.,, i badly need this.,, thanks
Headsets are the bomb Marc :). Excited for you!! An endearing friend of mine just discussed this topic with me recently, you took the words right out of his mouth, well done!
Forgive does not have to mean reconciliation
Wrong. Players and cheaters or polygamists always move on. They never settle down with one person, or love just one person. They believe in laying anyone who accepts them and that frankly is sick. When I was single, I wouldn’t want to be with someone whose had tons of girlfriends and especially marriages. Luckily I found a man that didn’t do that and even if I were single again, if any player guys had had multiple “loves” (lust) or another marriage, then, no matter do that, they’re out of luck and the best thing to do is wipe them off your shoe and you wait for better.
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great advice mark now i have always forgiven my partner after he cheated we been together 8 years this year, and the last 4 years in a row hes cheated, on valentines day of this year i found out that during the past 6 months he had been screwing up to 15 guys u know. Now it took a whole lot to forgive but i have,i have offered a open rship to him but he said he wouldnt like me screwing others lol!!! i know mad hey, i know he will do it again and i know one day i will of had enough but i am naturally a forgiving person unless its so bad then i become there worst nightmare if im crossed too much lol
The guy didn't want to be saddled down to sex with just one guy for the "rest of his life" and getting caught isn't gonna change that for very long. Mike needs to grow up a little and give the guy a break.
Here’s my story, I need some advice. Me and my boyfriend are like best friends, we do everything together we love each other and we have a great relationship emotionally and sexually, we broke up before and then got back together and everything was great but the first month we got back together he went to a fire pit and got extremely drunk, he made out with a girl and as soon as he realized what he was doing he left and felt so guilty that he drunkenly called his friends to tell them "i fucked up" he hid this from me our whole relationship and 3 days ago his friends that i haven't seen in months call me and tells me what happened. I'm supposed to talk to him tonight after work and I'm torn on what to do, they only made out and it was a random girl he's never met before. I'm extremely torn, if i forgive him theres gonna need to be boundaries set in place. what should i do?
Update!? What did you do???
@@babylegs777 still with him, I love him but I should’ve just left but he makes it very hard to leave. He still loves me and things are good for the most part but when things are bad they get bad. It’s a choice everyone has to make for themselves but leaving is a good way for you to find someone way better, idk if we’re gonna last or not but I did tell him If it happens every again its over for good. And I mean it. I feel like people let the attachment to the person stop them from leaving but best advice is try to detatch a bit. One person shouldn’t be your whole life, set goals for yourself and live life for you and not for a guy.
My situation is my be he cheat me and l saw the skirt his house how can l move on
Ive realised in the gay world, men always spend time looking over the fence......ive learned you dont own someone. There life experience is their's ~ who am i to say they are not going to have a really strong connection with someone else. Might be a past life connection.....who's to say.
My deal is if he cared about me (because he knew me) i wouldnt never have to ever know about it. Not because it wouldn't hurt me or not because its wrong.
But i wouldn't respect him anymore. He'd already know i would have left by the time he got home.
I just want the respect shown to me that i wouldn't have to think about him like that......as it would make us worthless.
Is this strange?
I personally don't believe in monogamy.....but i subscribe too it. I am.
Love your definition of forgiveness. You would make an excellent therapist.
Where the link so we can participate n call stream
Thank you. Very real n honest words
I know I have to let go, but let me listen to you
Excellent advice Marc. Thanks a lot for this. Dam! I've done so much research on this subject it's driven me potty :P
Once a cheater always a cheater. Take out all their excuses, they showed disrespect. What makes you think respect comes back overnight
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Are we overlooking the fact that it happened years ago and he violated his partners trust by reading his messages. I would rather find out my boyfriend cheated on me years ago than find out he was reading my text messages recently. That is not ok to do.
Got nothing to hide going through the phone should be no problem my girl got access to my shit any time she ask she gets my phone