Відео

I have no problem with anything you said. But people are complicated. They rarely act out of single motives. I believe that Laura was subjected to sexual abuse as a child, and that was the basis of my commentary. You are right in saying that it was one-sided.

@VicComello I agree, the fact that she allowed herself to be manipulated into giving a hand job and then the shame and self-loathing she felt would also indicate early boundary crossings. But also perhaps avoidance attachment style, idealizing Paul as a way to avoid the commitment with Andrew? I'm only halfway through the first series, though, so I will see how it plays out

She is testing him unconsciously. Since her unconscious has no self-awareness, she is not aware that she is doing it. She is testing to see whether it is safe to have a relationship with Paul. At issue is whether Paul will treat her as a person in need or as a sexual object to be exploited. She was probably sexually abused. so she is testing to see whether Paul will treat her as her abuser did or as someone who wants to help. Unfortunately, Paul's life is in a bad way so he is giving ambiguous signals about his intent.

Somehow I became unable to add content to this site except for answering comments when I started a new site at ua-cam.com/channels/cVEWfVvZoizi88t0GnQ94A.html.

I don't have a degree in psychology, but I also am amazed by all of the things going on in this show that I never even imagined when I first watched. There were the surface events that I reacted to, but underneath was this whole undercurrent of subtext and hidden motives and plot lines I didn't even see going on.

Good point! Maybe just a movie cliche. Alternatives would be Paul twiddling his thumbs in horror or dragging Walter out the door, pleading, "Don't die here! Don't die here!"

Yes, thanks. In a few weeks.

Because he probably deep down wants a therapist

She made him feel wanted and desired.

Thanks for your comment. Unfortunately, most people can't persist long enough even to watch the video to its end. The next video will be more like a TED talk in length.

You can buy the series from Amazon or stream it on Prime Video for the same price. The series is also available on Hulu but you also need to have HBO Max to see it.

I had parents like that, too. The thing to do is focus less on the past and more on the future. What kind of future do YOU want? If you can’t imagine what new directions might make your life better but are very dissatisfied with your life now, realize that your dissatisfaction is your heroic summons, your blissful vision of what life can be that has been covered over by scar tissue. You are a wounded warrior who was sent into the battle of life from childhood on with inadequate training, riddled defenses, the wrong roadmap, and few, if any, people on your side. If you can't settle on a long-term goal, you jumped into a foxhole that was too deep and you need to work your way out. The way to do that is focus on now. What do you love doing now? The anthropologist Joseph Campbell used to advise people to "follow your bliss." He meant a person should dedicate himself to what he truly loves to do with no thought of the future or a career. Your bliss is your lifeline out of the foxhole. After you are out, long-range goals will appear on the horizon. They will seem impossible to achieve, but realize that that feeling is merely the pathogenic belief that voices your bad past; it says nothing about the possibilities that are open to you. Moving forward will involve developing an out-of-body perspective that will hold fast to the truth of the last sentence and persevere. The thing to do is act as if you were who you want to be until you are. That day will come, but it will be a long road.

@@VicComello I don’t know what future I want 😩 I have been diagnosed with a personality disorder so it’s extremely hard for me to be around people. If I’m around them too long, I get argumentative. I am so confused because I don’t have any friends so it’s hard to imagine a future. I don’t do much. Go to the shops and then go home. That’s all I do

Impatience is your worst enemy. Your reactions to your past are normal. It would also be normal for progress were to take time. If you were to read the book Young Man Luther, by Erik Erikson, you would learn that there are two kinds of people: once-born people who easily fit in and twice-born people who need a kind of rebirth. Your rejection of the get any job solution would indicate that you are a twice-born person. Among the twice-born people Erikson discusses are Martin Luther, Sigmund Freud, and Charles Darwin. For all of them, an incubation process was needed before they found their true paths. I suggest you look at another of my videos entitled How to Make Your Dreams Come True. It focuses on Rudy, the guy who wanted to play football at Notre Dame. The real Rudy was a twice-born person. He is pictured as always knowing what he wanted to do in life, but playing football at Notre Dame is not a life goal. He had no idea what he wanted to do in life. As he explains in the video, playing football was a strategy. He figured that if he could do something as impossible as this, then the sky was the limit whenever he figured out what he wanted to do. When he left Notre Dame, he confronted the fact that he had no idea what he wanted to do, so he marked time. He sold car insurance at a car dealership and started up an office cleaning business. As a hobby, he gave inspirational talks about how his never-give-up attitude led him to achieving his goal of playing football if only for 17 seconds. He never thought of making a profession of that until someone suggested that he do so. At that point, the idea came to him that someone should make a movie about his quest to go to Notre Dame. He was a guy with no movie connections and no idea of how to interest people in the project. At first, no one did want to have anything to do with the movie; even Notre Dame had a rule forbidding making movies on campus. But he learned from his mistakes and persisted, and eventually the movie was made.

@@VicComello ok thanks for the reply, really appreciated. Is that a complex book?

It is written in Freudian jargon and therefore is a hard read, generally. The parts on twice-born people is very clear, but that represents only a small portion of the book. I tried to find a website that does a better job, but apparently "twice-born" has a different meaning that occupies most websites. I forgot to ask whether you are living at home. If so, and if you are of age, it would be good to get a job that would pay enough for you to leave home. When I used to come home from college for visits, I found that just being home caused me to lose my self-confidence. It wasn't anything my parents did. They didn't try to put me down; the visits were perfectly cordial. But simply being at home was enough to awaken old memories that impacted my self-confidence.