That might be my favourite line/delivery in the whole sketch. He must have been directed to read it like "someone said something nasty about you, not like someone's threatened to kill you".
And that line just before,so selfish and based on selfpreservation and disregard for the lives of others and then the "fuckin´asshole,he said that??" Completely dismiss and ignore his previous line,like what he said was basically evil and he cant even comfort the woman,he just takes it like someone started a rumor about him.
I honestly would love to see an action movie like this where the main character doesn't have any clever lines and is so stupidly angry the entire time.
@@midgetworld228 the problem is he keeps TRYING to have clever or cool lines, they just don't land well. He'd better off with "Are you dumb" and "You suck" lol
Right! I especially like the bit where Tim is supposed to play some reality TV show host. And they dress him in a full body suit that is supposed to be amazing. Then he starts saying I don't want to live anymore. That hit straight home.
Really happy Daniels ponied up the $2 mil to get Santa Clause in Everywhere Everything All at Once. It was a small role, but really made the movie feel like a cosmic gumbo of sorts.
5 months late on this but there's a video of the directors and Michelle Yeoh talking about how they filmed some of the scenes and at the end of the video Daniel Kwan says that the movie is a cosmic gumbo.
Having Crashmore interpret “He said he’ll kill us both” as a petty taunt meant only to demean him is awesome writing. Crashmore’s response only makes sense if she had said “He’s been telling everyone you’re still a virgin.” or something 😂
I love how it goes on like the joke is just how profane and angry the character is, cause it IS a good parody of a lot of action protagonists, and then it just hits you with the silliest, most absurd punchline.
Kind of, but only...mixed in some ways...with the....action, yeah action...of the.....ummmm......lemme think......eigh.....no......hmmmmmmmmm.......gimme a minute...........90's?
Me and my roomate watched this whole sketch completely silent without laughing until it was revealed that the maim guy was santa claus. We started chuckling, then laughing, then crying laughing, then gasping for air. Something about the santa reveal made it so funny we couldn't breath laughing for like 10 minutes straight
This is a skit that I didn’t really get when I first got into the show but now can’t stop laughing at. Once you understand the humor the show’s going for, it really opens up.
I can see why this couldn’t be onSNL I’m howling Its the ultimate epitomization of the revenge/action/John Wick type movie Even if that doesn’t make sense, theyve gotta give me that other 2 mil
so many hilarious moments ("fuckin' asshole....he said that?" being my fav), but one that many don't seem to find as funny, but was definitely intentional from the writers, was Crashmore's boss going "they killed your whole family, you need to take some time off." Yes, that's the least that should happen after what occured. "You need to take a few days off man." I always laugh at that part lmaoooo
The awkward disjointed use of swears really does seem like Santa Claus, a normally wholesome individual, trying and failing to play a hardened action hero
I gotta say I wasn’t a big fan of Santa’s last few movies but this really seems like a cosmic gumbo of the action films of the 90s and the exploration films of the 70s.
Small touch, but I like that the part where Crashmore asks his chief what he said, the chief just repeats it and Crashmore responds. In most movies, asking what he said would either be Crashmore implying he'll break the chief's jaw if he questions him again or the chief putting Crashmore on the spot to see if he's really committed to this war and Crashmore not being sure. In this skit, Crashmore just didn't hear him and answers calmly. I love that as much as Crashmore hates criminals, he never has any friction with other cops, heheheheheheheheheh! ...And now I have the scene in my head of Santa Claus either writing or agreeing to a script that has an exchange of dialogue where the only drama is that one guy just didn't hear the other guy. All of the stuff that gets cut from movies to save time and this exchange made it, heheheheheheheh!
"Fucking asshole, he said that?"
That's so unironically raw I'm mad a sketch comedy show did it before a real movie could
That might be my favourite line/delivery in the whole sketch. He must have been directed to read it like "someone said something nasty about you, not like someone's threatened to kill you".
The way it's delivered is just like it's gossip
Literally came here just for that line😂
And that line just before,so selfish and based on selfpreservation and disregard for the lives of others and then the "fuckin´asshole,he said that??" Completely dismiss and ignore his previous line,like what he said was basically evil and he cant even comfort the woman,he just takes it like someone started a rumor about him.
@@ralilahculver5267same!!!
I honestly would love to see an action movie like this where the main character doesn't have any clever lines and is so stupidly angry the entire time.
Watch any Steven seagal movie after about 2001...
Bruce Willis has been churning out 3 of those every year for the last decade.
Not sure if they're clever, but Crashmore has the best lines
@@midgetworld228 the problem is he keeps TRYING to have clever or cool lines, they just don't land well. He'd better off with "Are you dumb" and "You suck" lol
I always imagined hobo with a shotgun was like this movie
That "Are you dumb?!" after splattering that guys brains all over his face is the single funniest thing I've seen in a long ass time.
To me it was the slow awkward way he tripped him and then pounced on him
How funny would it be if dude had responded "no I'm fucking dead idiot' or something along that line ,😂
@@CrocusSealthis guy gets it. The lazy, sloppy, slow crawl headshot is fucking amazing
"I don't care if I die at all. Everything has sucked lately."
Always nice to have a main character I can relate to.
Right! I especially like the bit where Tim is supposed to play some reality TV show host. And they dress him in a full body suit that is supposed to be amazing. Then he starts saying I don't want to live anymore. That hit straight home.
Exactly how I felt until I became a mom.
Leaving this at 666 likes
The reveal of Crashmore being played by Santa made me do a spit take
Right? No reference to this at all until the end. Comedy gold.
@@Ffejro12256they buried the lead
@@acsone3546 lede
So you hauk tuahed?
"I'm so fuckin' pissed" as he walks away gets me every time for reasons I can't even begin to explain.
It’s him saying “I can’t stop crying” with teared up eyes is what gets me.
He’s literally me
It moves to the beat of jazz
I heard he gets paid 2 mil, because that's his quote. Even if he does a bad job.
@@ertuu8533 he's also seen every cock on the planet
@@rikjamesguitare how else is he gonna look for tattoos?
What jazz? "Paul Bufano",or more of a "Tiny Boop Squig Shorterly" vibe?
@@OreoVII your collection definitely isn't just meat and potatoes
Just the basic "you fucking suck" is solid gold
God I’m so fuckin pissed
-Santa Claus
@@TribalPoliticsI told your producers not to mention Christmas or that I do it at all.
It’s amazing that they crafted a sketch where EVERY line is quotable.
The whole god damned show is like that. I have so my any lines running in a loop in my head it borders on lunacy.
It’s like a cosmic gumbo!
Really happy Daniels ponied up the $2 mil to get Santa Clause in Everywhere Everything All at Once. It was a small role, but really made the movie feel like a cosmic gumbo of sorts.
That's his rate. Even if he does a bad job he still gets two mil.
We joke around on set all the time about how it's a cosmic gumbo
I swear to god every skit on this show is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen, yet I am completely unable to articulate why
it's interesting, the jokes
@@thefrancis742 dude 😂😂😂
Sort of a cosmic gumbo
@@ImRanchWilder lmaoooooo
@@sarahb8295 You knew I'd like this f****** comment didn't you
I've never seen a show make such great use of the phrase "not really"
My favourite is in the TC Tuggers sketch.
They still gotta give him his 2 mil
thats his rate even if he does a bad job
He might kill you but there’s no fuckin way he’s ever killing me
"Fuckin asshole... he said that?!"
He might not be chivalrous but he keeps it real.
Was great to see Santa in Everything Everywhere all at Once. I know they had to pay him his rate.
He CAN hit!
He got his 2 mil.
Even if he did a bad job?
5 months late on this but there's a video of the directors and Michelle Yeoh talking about how they filmed some of the scenes and at the end of the video Daniel Kwan says that the movie is a cosmic gumbo.
@@TL-tt5nn wait fr? is it like a reference? that’s actually a good description of that movie
Having Crashmore interpret “He said he’ll kill us both” as a petty taunt meant only to demean him is awesome writing. Crashmore’s response only makes sense if she had said “He’s been telling everyone you’re still a virgin.” or something 😂
It’s a cosmic gumbo
I love this actor's nasally voice too. It's great. My fave quote "I don't care if I die at all. Everything has sucked lately." Same, Santa, same.
“Quit runnin, dammit.” Fucking kills me every time
I honestly believe this is how Santa would act if he was cast in an action film and wrote all his lines
Cosmic gumbo - that’s one of the inside jokes we say a lot on the set
I love how it goes on like the joke is just how profane and angry the character is, cause it IS a good parody of a lot of action protagonists, and then it just hits you with the silliest, most absurd punchline.
profane and angry, yet articulates it like hes 12. "FUCK YOU, YOU SUCK!" as he sprays down a room
I can't stop crying
My favorite line 😂
They killed your whole family
They killed your whole family. You need to take some time off.
Recently started up another Fallout New Vegas playthrough, and this basically sums up how it's going so far
Ahh yes, ka ching ka ching
You got that “Bloody Mess” perk?
@@rosskerr1439 oh yeah
“Are you dumb???” Is such a fucking funny line I can’t get over it
This is basically a Seagal movie with a way better lead
Even I do a bad job they gotta pay me that other two mil
Santa shows up in Everything Everywhere All At Once. I bet he even got his two mil.
That's his quote
@@moregan101 Even if he does a bad job they've got to give him the two mil
this show is so underrated, ahead of its time
this movie preview never stops being funny lol
That would be great. That would be fuckin' great for me. Thanks.
Unprofessional bullshit
Unprofessional bullshit
I would pay good money to see the full length movie version of this skit.
Santa’s quote is 2 mil. Even if he does a bad job, they still gotta give him the 2 mil.
There is Violent night 🤷🏾♂️
It’s violent, but it knows that it is.
Need more movies where the protagonist says, “Fuck you, you suck!” Before killing the baddies.
just realized this and the ghost tour scene end with the same line : 'Not really'
edit: and the TC Tuggers one
What?! Thats right! I've watched them about 100 times each and I only now realized this after reading your comment.
You think getting a tattoo is good behavior? It's not, I don't care but it's not good behavior.
next year they're good tho
He said that?
Sometimes pretending I'm Detective Crashmore gets me through the day
That chase scene was intense
Do I detect a hint of the exploitation films of the 70s?
It's ultraviolence... but it knows that it is.
Yes! With some Tarantino and definitely some Michael Mann!
Kind of, but only...mixed in some ways...with the....action, yeah action...of the.....ummmm......lemme think......eigh.....no......hmmmmmmmmm.......gimme a minute...........90's?
The way I'd describe it is sort of like a cosmic gumbo
Me and my roomate watched this whole sketch completely silent without laughing until it was revealed that the maim guy was santa claus. We started chuckling, then laughing, then crying laughing, then gasping for air. Something about the santa reveal made it so funny we couldn't breath laughing for like 10 minutes straight
God I am so fucking pissed.
This sounds like a Grand Theft Auto radio advert.
This movie is actually the reason for christmas coming early to the folks in the office with the new copier
I keep rewatching this and thinking it's a cosmic gumbo.
Hey chief, don't save any cages. They ain't gonna be in jail!
I heard he told the producers not to mention Christmas, or that he does it at all.
This is why no one watches AOL Blast
We joked on set about it being a cosmic gumbo
It’s so dense, every frame has so much going on
It’s like poetry, it rhymes.
We need a detective crashmore movie. Like macgruber
“Quit running, damnit.”
*shoves bad guy
You knew i’d like this sketch hahaha ka-ching
Violent Night trailer made me think of this immediately.
The lighting focusing on just his eyes with the Santa reveal is fantastic
This is a skit that I didn’t really get when I first got into the show but now can’t stop laughing at. Once you understand the humor the show’s going for, it really opens up.
Remember how we would make inside jokes about how it's sort of a cosmic gumbo?
I can see why this couldn’t be onSNL I’m howling
Its the ultimate epitomization of the revenge/action/John Wick type movie
Even if that doesn’t make sense, theyve gotta give me that other 2 mil
i like that he's just mildly pissed off
Its the thoughtful and provocative dialog that i truly appreciate.
This is by far one of the best skits in the series. Brings me to tears laughing every time.
Imagine one day this skit just starts airing on television like a trailer. And that’s how we find out an actual movie has been made…
he got paid 2 mil to play crashmore
That’s his quote
@@FlansterTheFilm and because it's his quote that's what they have to pay. 2 mil.
@@ertuu8533 even if he does a bad job he still gets paid 2 mil
@@FlansterTheFilm That means if he does even one more movie he gets another two mil
so many hilarious moments ("fuckin' asshole....he said that?" being my fav), but one that many don't seem to find as funny, but was definitely intentional from the writers, was Crashmore's boss going "they killed your whole family, you need to take some time off." Yes, that's the least that should happen after what occured. "You need to take a few days off man." I always laugh at that part lmaoooo
Most corporate jobs would make you come back the next day.
God bless Biff Wiff for this
This has 15k views as of me writing this. I may or may not be responsible for about 1k of them. I can't stop watching this clip!
I can't stop crying
He might kill you but there’s no fuckin way he’s killing me. He really said that?
A masterpiece
I love the unspoken implication that this movie only exists because the producers were afraid of not getting presents that year.
David Harbour is the new detective crashmore
I’ve lost count of the times I’ve watched this for a good laugh.
This movie's such a cosmic gumbo
It’s interesting, the guns
“GOD I AM SO FUCKIN PISSED.”
I can actually see Nick Sax from Happy! delivering a lot of these lines.
The "what'j'you say?" at the end really makes it
I love how he just viciously blasts em all 😂
This type of comedy is right in my Q zone.
It’s also in Johnny’s Q Zone
🎵Palm tree girls love palm tree guys🎵
We really, I mean REALLY really need a full length (or at least 15 minute) version of this!!
This movie needs to exist
I am so psyched to see Claus in a more dramatic role!
What a career renaissance for Biff Wiff
He makes me want to get a tattoo!!!!!!!
Do you even want any presents this year?
@@wasret83 what’s wrong with getting a tattoo??? It’s normal behavior
@@ThePynnacle He doesn't care about it but it's not good behaviour
most amazing punchline i've ever seen. master class.
are you dumb??
is the best line xD
"Stealth is optional for this mission"
God, I am so fuckin pissed.
I am so glad I found this show recently. Everything has been awful lately but this
When your angry drunk uncle is the star of an action movie
The awkward disjointed use of swears really does seem like Santa Claus, a normally wholesome individual, trying and failing to play a hardened action hero
0:05 how it feels starting new game plus
I gotta say I wasn’t a big fan of Santa’s last few movies but this really seems like a cosmic gumbo of the action films of the 90s and the exploration films of the 70s.
Small touch, but I like that the part where Crashmore asks his chief what he said, the chief just repeats it and Crashmore responds. In most movies, asking what he said would either be Crashmore implying he'll break the chief's jaw if he questions him again or the chief putting Crashmore on the spot to see if he's really committed to this war and Crashmore not being sure. In this skit, Crashmore just didn't hear him and answers calmly. I love that as much as Crashmore hates criminals, he never has any friction with other cops, heheheheheheheheheh!
...And now I have the scene in my head of Santa Claus either writing or agreeing to a script that has an exchange of dialogue where the only drama is that one guy just didn't hear the other guy. All of the stuff that gets cut from movies to save time and this exchange made it, heheheheheheheh!
@1:32 Anyone else think Ryan Tanna could play a convincing Leon Kennedy from RE or is it just me?
It definitely a little Tarantino.
The clip: “I’m sorry Crashmore”
Me: “I cant stop Watchin”
"i killed your entire family, you need to take some time off"
I love how casually that line is said and never brought up again
He definitely can't stop crying.
Did you know he got 2 mil for this?
Chicken spaghetti at chickilini's, Itty bitty jeans, white Ferrari, spiked up blonde hair. Oh yeah, I used to be a real piece of shit.
Have you ever wondered what sort of fucked up food Chicken Spaghetti must have been
The "YOU SUCK" as he unloads a machine gun into that dude who answered the door 😂😂😂
Thanks, Jesse, for bringing me here :D
This is the True Detective follow up we never got.
Can someone explain why this is so fucking funny? I can’t put my finger on it.
The way he said You suck! Is the best part
Hes like if a fearless psychopath was actually a nice guy deep down.
Anyone else here after seeing the trailer for ‘Violent Night’?
I cannot believe the internet isn't more on this.