Stoicism Is Emotional Mastery
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- Опубліковано 21 лип 2024
- I talk about how to master and control your emotions with stoicism.
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00:00 Intro
01:39 Anxiety
03:50 Dealing with anxiety
06:45 Grief
10:07 Dealing with grief
13:05 "Mild anxiety"
14:00 The inner parent and inner child
15:53 Anger
Oh yeah, I forget but there is a Discord server: discord.gg/sCgThXnk
New Discord but I created one. Uncommon Sense needs a ⛏️ crew
I watched the video earlier today and gave a thumbs up . Didn't have time to comment until now . I just want to say that you're soooo much more than just a muscle man ..This video is so important.
I too have terrible anxiety . I take medicine for . I love coffee ☕️ but sometimes it makes me paranoid.
I love dipping my Oreos in coffee .
But like you said, they will make you feel good in the moment but terrible later . Being female , i pack on the lbs around my waistline and hips , then i get depressed when i look in the mirror . Im trying to lose 20 lbs . My clothes get real tight and its extremely uncomfortable .
Im trying so hard to have a more positive attitude about myself and be a better person but its not easy . Eating better does help me feel better but my craving for sweets is sometimes unbearable .
Im using self hypnosis but i cant get the images of cake , cookies , ice cream out of my head . I often wonder if its better to live longer by eating healthier and dieting or eating what i want and live less long . My normal wieght is 110 to 120 but right now im around 140 .
If i dont stop now , i will go up to 170 . Thats so very depressing .
I ate only 2 cookies today . So its a start again . Ive been through this too many times and im so exhausted from the weight fluctuations . I dont understand how some ppl can eat whatever they want and still stay thin .
Must be nice lol .
@@bellabookitty9014 appreciate the comment about me being more than a muscle man 😄 there's often a reason some people can "eat whatever they want and stay lean", like the fact that they exercise and mostly *don't* eat whatever they want. They key if you struggle with this is to not think black and white but in terms of improvement. Maybe you don't have to give cookies up completely but maybe you can do it less often and gradually find better options. And lift weights ☝️ it will both give your body a more defined shape and make losing/maintaining weight easier. I will make a video for women at some point and lifting weights will be a major recommendation
Wao I need this 👌🏽, specially dealing with people, as soon as you let them find what triggers you, you open a door to manipulation and disrespect.
Very true I once heard a quote about Anger "Anger is like drinking poison youreelf then expecting youre enemy to drop dead"
@@patrickirish8091 aunt May says that to Peter Parker in the 3rd Raimi movie 😄
Your story of being alone in Greece late last year while dealing with relationship issues quite literally mirrored mine. I was alone in Athens late November going through the same struggles.
Fantastic. Thank you
""Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway." - John Wayne
@thescerigai What an incredible
statement for sure . 👌
It's so funny that you post this up right now. I started to get close to this very nice young lady. I realize how cold and hard I was. I also realized that a real man can open up and endure pain if needed. That was last week and then your video comes up now. That's awesome thank you so much man
@@mckmanx1 happy it was helpful brother
This is a great video, especially educational for young men who encounter feelings that are new in their young life. Your method for processing your grief is healthy and appropriate.
I love this video. Been through years of therapy and you taught me more than my therapist. Damn, that was a lot of money. 😂
Life experience beats studying theory in school. Now you know where to invest 😄
Thanks for reaffirming something I'd just figured out myself just within the last year or so... that acting as if we "have no feelings" is just weakness. I don't know if you're familiar with the movie (I'm sure it's based on a book) "Lonesome Dove" - but one of the main characters is named 'Call.' Call is the stereotypically American 'cowboy', the so-called "strong, silent type." The first time I ever watched that movie (last year) one of the first things I said to my wife was, "I know that Call is supposed to be a hero in this story, but I think he's just a bitch." And the reason I could say that so easily is because I had just weeks earlier realized that all my life I was always trying to be 'that guy' like Call. I looked back at my life and realized how I either always failed to be 'that guy' or how I just made things worse when I actually was that guy. I know so many other dudes trying to be like that and I can't help but to have no respect for them... because I know from personal experience that if you're trying to be that guy - it's because you're not really a real man; so you're trying to put on the facade of what our society tells us a "real man" is.
To add to a little more about what kind of "man" Call is - he had his son working for him as a cowboy but his son didn't know that Call was his father - and Call never filled him in. Even at the end of the movie when he 'told him' - he never actually TOLD him... He was just nice to him finally for once (instead of treating him like shit like he always had) and that was his way of patting the boy on his back or whatever. smh Weak.
super timely video, was just talking about this topic with my girlfriend the other day about how I often refuse and negate my own emotions, which leads to inaction on my part. recently I've been feeling afraid to make more big changes in my life, so I've been distracting myself into not doing things that would ultimately benefit me. by doing this, I'm saying "no" to my own emotions. I'm slowly learning to not take that road, and it's tough to do, but I know it will ultimately get me to where I want to be
@@boboobrob one step at a time brother ⛏️
I loved the analogy of the child and the father. Very visual, good job bro, maybe a full video about it would be great 👍
@@llistademusica ✍️
The last few weeks I’ve been in a slump. Not really used to feeling like this lately, as I have really done the work the past few years to get into shape and become a better man… but I feel like I’m hitting some setbacks now, not feeling as motivated to get my day to day stuff done. Your videos help. Thanks.
I'm glad man. You can't pour from an empty cup so do your best but give yourself a break too and you'll be right up there soon enough
1st in life and comment sections 👌🏼
🥇
This video was helpful at the moment ✌️
I'm glad
Such a great message! You absolutely need to go through it to get past it. Anxiousness is high for me when I deny or ignore something I need to face. Once you face it you can heal from it
Great subject and video, Theo! I've recently been reading and repeating Epictetus' The Art of Living. One nuance he points out there is the idea that most of the negative feelings people have are unnecessary. That through clear thinking and understanding, we don't need to subject or plague ourselves with negative emotions and thoughts. Of course it's easier said than done. A lot of it has to do with focusing on the things that are in our control and that we trouble ourselves when we focus on trying to control things we can't. Understanding what we truly can and can't control is not easy in itself, but generally speaking we have the most control over ourselves and our thoughts and actions, and not those of others. Interpretations are another huge factor.
I find this type of self-mastery extremely difficult but I think its very much worth it.
That's also true and it's another thing I'm working on lately, when I feel uneasy because "I'm not being productive", it's a negative feeling that can go away immediately by auto-suggesting a different outlook
went through an anger episode yesterday, the funny thing is when I get angry for getting angry. Best is to embrace it and understand it's ok to feel that way sometimes
@@marius3391 yeah I talked about it, when you react to your own emotion in a loop making it worse
@@UncommonSense exaclty and I've noticed the anger stress persist longer when I'm on coffee so I've cut down on it
Being in the uncomfortable and acknowledging the hard feelings does help a lot, I used to lock away my emotions and it turned me into a literal zombie. After sitting and stewing on years of shite I've gotten to the point where I can somewhat recognize my own feelings in a healthy way and kinda pickup on other people's feelings.
Stay Stacked Brother ❤
I've noticed that we often take ownership of our emotions, as if we are responsible for them. Then we even judge ourselves for having them if they are "bad". If we feel angry though, it's not like we willed that or wanted that to happen. So where do they come from?
It makes sense to me to take a passive or curious approach to them, like "whoa, I have this feeling of anger right now. Interesting." It seems to me that if you fully engage with them and act like they are yours, that can lead to you acting on them in ways that you would never intend.
The best modern description of stoicism is found in Rudyard Kipling's poem "If". But of course, Kipling was a british colonist in India, and he dares talk about "men" instead of "persons". HOW DARE HE!!!111 🙂 Anyway, if you want a good book on the subject, I recommend Massimo Pigliucci's "How to be a stoic". Or just take the slightly condensed version from the Enchiridion: "Some things are under your control. Most things are out of your control. If you want to be happy and effective, focus on those things that are under your control, and disregard the rest."
People have Stoicism completely wrong. I don’t understand. It’s about being a superconductor for your emotions.
I’m not sure why people think you either need to react to your emotions recklessly, cry like a baby, burst out in anger, or suppress them and pretend they’re not there, and that those are the only two options.
I don't get it either most of them think suppressing is masculine which means you are actually running away from them and don't wanna face negative emotions which is actually very weak trait.
I find it difficult to deal with emotions when it is not the correct time for it, like at a social event. A series of thoughts or something that reminds me of a past event can trigger a deep sadness or anger which can totally overwhelm me in those situations. I am in touch with my emotions, but I noticed that there are just so many negative ones.
I was in a complicated situation of an unanswered love and while going through that I was not losing minutes or hours by being overwhelmed by emotions, but days. Since that situation is over it has become manageable, but I feel like something like this can easily happen again.
Do you have a method of dealing with emotions when they overwhelm you at the wrong time or for too long?
Are you really in touch with your emotions if you're having troubles with being overwhelmed by them in unrelated situations? Sounds like there's a lot of unprocessed emotions stored up. Gotta feel it to heal it. Give yourself whatever you need
Bro we want a drama episode where u explain gf situation
@@iliesbondon1176 you're gonna have to be patient and respectful to the fact that I am extremely personal here but still have a private life
Hey Theo, I have a question/small topic idea for you! How much do you know about science of appetite? I have been lifting well for several years. I would call myself an early intermediate in weight training. Good form, knowledge, and discipline. Good physique but I want more. I need to eat more protein. I buy eggs and plenty of meat, but I just don't have a ravenous appetite. I find it difficult to consume 200 g or more of protein daily and sometimes do not even get 100. Do you know of any lifestyle habits to increase appetite, or any supplements/chemical compounds to increase it? I am on one medication and see my doctor soon. I will ask if the medicine could be limiting my hunger. I will do my own research and check in with you on the Sunday live stream. If you answer this or do not answer it, thank you either way and thank you for the content of this channel. Have an awesome day!
@@andrewmueller9986 hey mr Mueller. It's not certain that eating more protein is your issue. It could just be eating MORE or changing your training approach. See my video on bulking here: ua-cam.com/video/5WyPYwcaM6A/v-deo.html
My book and 2nd tier coaching program would be helpful for you as well.
Yeah for sure there are medications that supress appetite. Just google yours. But yeah see the bulk video
@@UncommonSense Yes I am naturally tall and thin. Being toned and lean is not difficult. Fat loss is not difficult. Bulking is. I would love to love eating. I just never have that deep hungry. Maybe if I tried I fast I'd come out the other side extremely hungry. Thanks.
@@andrewmueller9986bulking protein shakes could be an easy solution, if eating more really is the issue. Throw in some oats and peanut butter too 🥜 personally I drink lean protein shakes to get protein in but reduce hunger as I'm cutting instead 😅 good luck!
@@LennefalkStudios Oh I buy protein powder. I know what to get and do get it. I just wish I had a ravenous appetite. Eating enough to bulk is a chore often.
@@andrewmueller9986 haha jealous, I definitely have the opposite problem. Could easily eat 10k kcals if I didn't stop myself haha, now hovering around 2500-3000 kcals mostly. Best of luck with the bulking 😊🔥💪
Now you see how all the bad experience was actually your biggest blessing
You would never be able to put out 30 minutes a day video if you didn't have the experience on your own 💪😎
Zero regrets, I'll make a video on that too actually
10:07 Are my videos good? V HONEST.
-BOT