My hook was "You're not supposed to laugh at a severe diagnosis, are you?" When i was in 7th grade, I was diagnosed with severe chrons disease, but for some reason fell over laughing. I guess my admissions officer matched my freak because i got into Harvard and Yale 😂
from India I am looking for the right video on how to essay for US college applications did not knew only needed to find Shinwoo Lee to give me tips . well as someone who is trying to do something different with my career with a sea full of risks , I am really glad to find your videos . immediatly I was overwhelmed and the next video " your are not overwhelmed you just need this system " video popped up. HAHA, feels great when you get a guide , its like finding a bird in the middle of the sea who shows you the direction ! thanks Shinwoo Lee ( by the way , how well did i write?)
Dude, this is the first video that actually helps. Thank you so much for the video. It’s very helpful and your outline is great thank you so much. I’ll make sure I thank you again if I get into a school,lol Your video is short straight to the point not like the other long useless videos filled with BS .please keep it that way thank you again!
Hey Shinwoo, I tried to book a discovery call on your website, and it is giving me an error saying "This Calendly link is not valid." I was also wondering if the Inspirate Consulting is a free program?
is this a good opening One slip of my fingers and they would never find my body. Fear constricted around my throat, tightening with every heartbeat. From a hundred meters over the deck on the fighting top, the ocean stretched into a vast canvas, rising and falling like the heartbeats of a giant. Gales of wind roared into my ears, dragging me into the sea as rain battered my body. I cried ugly tears, as our Able Bodied Seaman guided me down, descending rung by rung. Despite the encouraging cheering from my classmates, I was ashamed; I was the only one unable to reach the top. This school year was going to be harder than I thought.
Relatively but there are some issues. Ex. This is way too vague give some idea of what’s happening even if you don’t give much. Also the first 2-3 lines have some pretty iffy word choice. Like saying fear constricted my throat sounds off, try my throat constricted with fear or something along those lines, also the I’m not sure what “on the fighting top” means. Otherwise it’s pretty good
@@woollymammoth2123 Thank you for the feedback I am on a sailing ship. Here is the rest of the opening Main One slip of my fingers and they would never find my body. Fear constricted around my throat, tightening with every heartbeat. From a hundred meters over the deck on the fighting top, the ocean stretched into a vast canvas, rising and falling like the heartbeats of a giant. Gales of wind roared into my ears, dragging me into the sea as rain battered my body. I cried ugly tears, as our Able Bodied Seaman guided me down, descending rung by rung. Despite the encouraging cheering from my classmates, I was ashamed; I was the only one unable to reach the top. This school year was going to be harder than I thought.
Good morning mate. I must commend the great efforts you put into this channel not to talk about your good communication skills. Would love to work with your consultant agency but I’m finding it difficult to book a call. Please is there an email address I can reach you with? Austin from Italy
My hook was "You're not supposed to laugh at a severe diagnosis, are you?" When i was in 7th grade, I was diagnosed with severe chrons disease, but for some reason fell over laughing. I guess my admissions officer matched my freak because i got into Harvard and Yale 😂
Single handedly helping all students who wanna lock in 💯🐐
You will 100% have millions if subs one day. Remember me when you're famous!
from India I am looking for the right video on how to essay for US college applications did not knew only needed to find Shinwoo Lee to give me tips . well as someone who is trying to do something different with my career with a sea full of risks , I am really glad to find your videos . immediatly I was overwhelmed and the next video " your are not overwhelmed you just need this system " video popped up. HAHA, feels great when you get a guide , its like finding a bird in the middle of the sea who shows you the direction !
thanks Shinwoo Lee ( by the way , how well did i write?)
Try to work on your sentence punctuation, and there are some spelling errors, but nice shot.
yo make sure that your essays have good grammar and punctuation, btw would love to hear about your application process. im from india too
Dude, this is the first video that actually helps. Thank you so much for the video. It’s very helpful and your outline is great thank you so much. I’ll make sure I thank you again if I get into a school,lol
Your video is short straight to the point not like the other long useless videos filled with BS .please keep it that way thank you again!
ok very good, i will lock in
this helped so much! Thanks Shinwoo!
Hey Shinwoo, I tried to book a discovery call on your website, and it is giving me an error saying "This Calendly link is not valid." I was also wondering if the Inspirate Consulting is a free program?
Heyy bro your inspirate consulting is not working I am currently applying to several colleges and really need someone to review my profile
is this a good opening One slip of my fingers and they would never find my body.
Fear constricted around my throat, tightening with every heartbeat. From a hundred meters over the deck on the fighting top, the ocean stretched into a vast canvas, rising and falling like the heartbeats of a giant. Gales of wind roared into my ears, dragging me into the sea as rain battered my body. I cried ugly tears, as our Able Bodied Seaman guided me down, descending rung by rung. Despite the encouraging cheering from my classmates, I was ashamed; I was the only one unable to reach the top. This school year was going to be harder than I thought.
Relatively but there are some issues. Ex. This is way too vague give some idea of what’s happening even if you don’t give much. Also the first 2-3 lines have some pretty iffy word choice. Like saying fear constricted my throat sounds off, try my throat constricted with fear or something along those lines, also the I’m not sure what “on the fighting top” means. Otherwise it’s pretty good
@@woollymammoth2123 Thank you for the feedback I am on a sailing ship. Here is the rest of the opening
Main
One slip of my fingers and they would never find my body. Fear constricted around my throat, tightening with every heartbeat. From a hundred meters over the deck on the fighting top, the ocean stretched into a vast canvas, rising and falling like the heartbeats of a giant. Gales of wind roared into my ears, dragging me into the sea as rain battered my body. I cried ugly tears, as our Able Bodied Seaman guided me down, descending rung by rung. Despite the encouraging cheering from my classmates, I was ashamed; I was the only one unable to reach the top. This school year was going to be harder than I thought.
@@BrandonFriedman-n2z nice but too many descriptive words which seem off topic
Good morning mate. I must commend the great efforts you put into this channel not to talk about your good communication skills.
Would love to work with your consultant agency but I’m finding it difficult to book a call. Please is there an email address I can reach you with?
Austin from Italy
you can find my email on my UA-cam page!