Hey there, I am the guy who posted about how I’m struggling with everything at 19. The thing I like the most about Dr. K is that he actually understands a lot of societal problems that plays a role in mental health struggles rather than just giving google advice like “just keep trying” he sees it differently and even acknowledged that simply just people to keep trying and hope for the best is not good advice and could actually lower your confidence is success is low. That’s what’s been happening with me. I’ve been told to just keep trying which I have been doing but I still have had no luck and it’s damaged my confidence a lot. In fact what led me to writing that post was that I received a rejection from a position from Target which I actually felt confident about getting and it stung. I heard it’s the job market too since someone has been declined from McDonald’s. It’s very harsh out there and I feel a lot of stress from it. Thank you Dr. K for sharing this and trying to understand my point of view, really made my day
I was unemployed with undiagnosed ADHD and unhealed childhood trauma and it was rejection hell for years. I didn't even know what I didn't know about how job searching is supposed to go. I didn't know you needed cover letters and once you get to an interview how to be socially adept enough to get hired. I didn't even apply for many jobs because job searching was ADHD hell and I was addicted to everything else on the internet instead. Dr K was rejected from 140 medical schools i think he said. But something eventually clicked and all you need is one place to accept you/ hire you for everything in your life from that point forward to change. If you can figure out why McDonald's and Target might've rejected you -- you seem overqualified on your resume or you lack social skills etc and try to fix that issue for the next time you apply to another place, or if you play more of a numbers game and acknowledge the hard work of applying to 10 different local fast food chains and getting rejected by all of them but it did the work to try your best and apply, and you learned from the experience of doing the resume and getting some interviews and from there you think you'll be more prepared for the next 10 and you keep going, eventually one of them will accept you. And you can learn from the job and be so much more skilled the next time you apply somewhere else. Volunteer work can also be amazing on your resume and amazing at helping you build so many skills and they often have a lower bar for accepting people vs rejecting them than jobs. They'll take every volunteer they can get a lot of places. Things got way better for me eventually. I'm not saying new, different obstacles didn't cross my path. But things can change all at once if you keep giving life opportunities to help you out. Your luck can turn around. Your skills can improve. Etc. My apologies if this seems like a "just keep trying" advice thing. I hope my comments are more nuanced than that. Try something else. Don't keep trying the same thing. And like Dr K said, don't just ignore how it feels harder and harder. You have to approach it differently.
Hey man, I graduated college in 2008 with a 2.2 GPA. Economic recession coupled with my very poor academic choices gave me little options in the open market. I made a hard choice to join the Army as a college option OCS candidate. What that means is that I had to go through Basic Training at Ft. Benning with the other infantry entry candidates, go through another 12-week OCS course to earn my commission. It was the greatest blessing in disguise because it gave me goals to elevate myself to. Each gateway I passed on my military journey was just that. It was difficult, but not un-achievable. I say this because my path may not be yours, but everyone needs to have goals in their life they can achieve that elevate themselves to the person they need to be to not only reach them, but also earn the rewards. You have the power and capability to define your path in life. Building your physical and mental resiliency is paramount to that success. You’re never alone when you walk with God. Even if you struggle like me with my faith every day, acting as if God exists has worked out for me and I hope it can be for you. God Bless and I hope this message finds you well.
@ntxsirenvators8983 Wishing you all the best and strength brother! Thank you for taking the inspiring first step of making this honest and vulnerable post.
*Intro & Housekeeping:* 4:17 *Understanding Fatalism in the Community:* - *Community Feedback and Ownership:* 19:48 - *Addressing Negativity and Rejection of Help:* 22:16 *Case Study 1 - "Please Convince Me to Have Hope":* 23:19 - *The Need for Hope and the Desire to Live:* 26:59 - *The Energy Investment in a "Worthless Life":* 31:44 - *Recognizing the Drive to Improve:* 32:16 - *The Importance of Critical Thinking:* 35:21 - *Identifying Contradictions in Thought Processes:* 39:26 - *Understanding Help-Rejecting Systems:* 41:49 - *The Power of Being the Problem:* 43:35 - *Mental Karma - The Importance of Mental Actions:* 46:19 - *Responding to Impulses and Desires:* 53:51 - *The World Isn't Against You, But It May Have Been:* 55:18 - *Changing Your Response to Circumstances:* 57:53 - *Seeking Sustained Help and Support:* 59:43 *Case Study 2 - "Life is a Huge Disappointment":* 1:06:31 - *The Snowball Effect of Success and Failure:* 1:08:14 - *The Futility of "Just Keep Trying":* 1:10:45 - *"If At First You Don't Succeed, Try It a Different Way":* 1:12:58 - *The Increasing Rate of Rejection in Modern Life:* 1:16:12 - *Focusing on Improvement, Not Outcomes:* 1:22:51 - *Perception is Reality - Control Your Inputs:* 1:30:59 - *Set Yourself Up for a Better Tomorrow:* 1:34:28 *Case Study 3 - "How to Feel Good About Myself":* 1:37:58 - *The Impact of Controlling Parents:* 1:39:14 - *The Cycle of Pushing and Atrophy:* 1:45:05 - *Taking Responsibility and Tolerating Disappointment:* 1:47:53 - *The Power of Compassion and Firm Boundaries:* 1:51:26 *Self-Improvement as a Burden:* - *The Limitations of Self-Help Content:* 2:04:31 - *The Importance of Action and Investment:* 2:06:45 - *Investing in Yourself - Time, Energy, and Resources:* 2:09:34 - *The Value of Suffering for Improvement:* 2:11:53 - *Finding Balance and Prioritizing Your Own Needs:* 2:42:54 *Closing Thoughts and Q&A:* - *Prioritizing Internal Change and Externalization:* 2:35:48 - *The Importance of External Perspectives:* 2:38:22 - *Using Suffering as a Resource for Growth:* 2:49:51 - *Thank You and Closing Remarks:* 2:52:58
I am a 29 y.o. woman from a non-english speaking country, indifferent to videogames, conventionally attractive and happily married. I may not be your target audience, but I had a very long term depression, once I was volunteerly hospitalized and one psychiatrist shared the link to Doctor K's video about fixing sleep schedule. I follow this channel for a year and what I learnt is helping me a lot, I try to practice this in life not just watch. Thank you, Doctor and good luck to all of the community in making our lives better and healthier
"one psychiatrist shared the link to Doctor K's video" - That's cool :) Yeah, the naming of this channel is a bit unfortunate. It's purely a historical legacy at this point. Dr. K has since expanded his efforts to all kinds of mental health challenges, not just gaming addiction.
Thank you for saying it can be terminal instead of being toxically positive. There's a big difference between saying "don't lose hope, it's gonna get better" and "yes it sucks, but there's still hope".
Something I think about often when watching Dr. K's videos is how many of these struggles with mental health would exist today if today's young adult population had the same socioeconomic mobility and stability as older generations had at the same age. For the proverbial older person who says they had it just as rough-go look up median housing prices: median income ratios over time. Not to mention the fact that everything from an academic and professional standpoint has gotten order of magnitudes more competitive. For example, I have a relative who is in their late-30s who is an anesthesiologist. They told me (though hesitantly) that they likely would not have been able to match into the same specialty given the level of competition there is today compared to just around a decade ago. It seems like we're all working more and more for less and less, and you just have to think there has to be a point of critical mass.
I agree with you completely! And, I know for me, focusing on how fucked our system is, makes taking action to improve my life feel pointless. However, pretending everything is fine with where our current society is headed is delusional. I'm not sure how to reconcile these two things.
@@Hexanitrobenzeneit ain't supported by data. It a political speech, not scientific. He basically pulls graphs out of his ass and never defines his categories (like a generation) or control groups.
I feel f***ed by this: I was abducted in addiction, and escaped and got sober. So I figured that was clearly the worst behind me, like that was my life’s big f***ed challenge and I would finally be able to use my [pretty f***ing amazing] brain for something other than getting, using and getting more drugs. Instead, after 6 months of being aware I was in severe shock, I started experiencing severe dissociation, dissociative fugues, daily amnesia, and losing time- 5 hours a day on average but sometimes up to three days. My brain that had done me so well in surviving a decade+ of the insane internal war and the excruciating external consequences of addiction was a stranger to me. Or should I say strangers, because a month or two into this new experience of myself, I was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder. I lost my fiancé, friends, family, my fortitude and how full of life I was… and a left with the exact sentiment you’re addressing here: I’m fucked. Somehow I still have managed to circumnavigate the temptation of falling back into drugs and the bouts of severe depression that accompanied the more severe episodes I experienced early on. But that was SIX YEARS AGO. I have always had through the roof ADHD, been too smart for my own good and struggled with true vulnerability necessary for healing… but not only have those things led to some serious maladaptive mechanisms of the mind and behaviours, now I’m in my early 30s with no job, no friends, no romantic prospects (because why would I force myself like half baked bread down someone’s throat under the guise of sustenance for a relationship, I know I need quite a bit more time in the oven before I’m capable of offering that) and no real life. I was nothing like this before. So yeah, “f***ed” sounds about right. I’m just starting watching, so I will comment if anything piques my interest as a tool I could use because I’m nothing if not motivated to move forward… but hopelessness colours much of my world these days. I’m not depressed (we all have our days) and I refuse to give up, but I’m just… feeling fucked. Seems like the stream was ruled perfectly because I can’t truly encompass it more succinctly than that. Thank you for reading and my heart goes out to anyone else feeling this sentiment, regardless of why and what your life looks like… your feelings are valid and we all deserve a little compassion and help sometimes. Xoxo, Gossip Girl.
Feel like I wrote this. Literally almost word for word the exact same story with me. Except we never actually got engaged ... You are not alone, whatever that may be worth. 💝
“If one person that you meet is an asshole, they’re the asshole. If everyone that you meet is an asshole - you’re the asshole.” Dr.K 2K24 😂😂😂 love this
I feel like so many of our problems are rooted or merely exist becoz of a certain family member. It’s like we had this person we expected would be our safe space but instead they chose to wreck havoc in our life than actually respect our beliefs our trying to understand us. Today’s my birthday and seeing how my parents haven’t even acknowledged it is internally welling up tears in me, although I refuse to let other people’s behaviours overrule my emotional well being, it’s still something that lingers. Had all of us a deep connection with even one of our parents, I’m pretty sure 90% of our problems would either not exist, or would have very little damage on our mental and physical well being.
Unfortunately, it's not that simple. I have decent connection with my father and good connection with my mother, and I still have mental health problems and NEET lifestyle. Messy place the human mind is...
Yeah was completely obvious to me too (even though it doesn't apply to me)... But I've been watching this channel for a while so might be I'm just used to their style. I didn't even get what the misunderstanding was at first.
The way I integrate your content is to write things/concepts you say that stands out to me and write about it in my journal. I also talk about certain things you say that strikes a chord w me to my therapist.
My self-imposed rule is that I only put self-help videos on when I'm doing work of some kind. Cleaning, cooking, walking, doesn't matter - I just can't let myself sit on the couch and watch content like this.
Why self help videos tho? This self help shit isnt useful imo unless you are actively listening and making changes in your lives/thinking. Dr k even says this in this very stream lol
30:51 oh wow this reminds me of an episode of M*A*S*H! A soldier was trying to commit suicide; Sherman T Potter prove to him that he wanted to live by forcing him in a fight with the gas meant to knock someone out.. The guy panicked and Potter off and had his fists up. And that's when the colonel told him "that's the spirit! That's the part of you that wants to live now hold on to that!"
Thank you for making this video! Please make more content on people feeling "fucked" or lost in life. This resontates with me a lot and is the content I need and would like to see from healthygamer.
The mom/controlling parent thing is also super common in Hispanic/Latino households. In my 20s in college, I had to deal with a lot of this and ended up getting through most of it by having really unpleasant arguments and finally just saying "I'm sorry you feel this way about x y z, but I need to learn how to be an adult." And it was uncomfortable, but it worked.
I always knew my parents are to blame for many things that fucked me up, but simply because I am autistic and they simply didn't want to believe their child is different. Of course they can't expect the same things from me. But I keep learning about things they also did that can fuck me up as well. Breaking off any communication and abandoning my family is like the best thing I did for my mental health so far.
The correspondent is right about "the whole world being against him," in the sense Doc K describes -- advertising and entertainment and many cultural values are set up to tell you you are not enough, you are a loser, you are not making enough money, you don't have the right motivation, you don't value the right things, you don't belong to the right religion . . . etc. Also, you may have not been given a good start, good training, good support at a crucial time in your life. And it is absolutely true that, in that case, you will have a very hard time creating a stable life. So . . .what I do, for what is worth, is dismiss all these "training experiences" that were actually designed to manipulate me. I stopped watching television (especially television news -- I know how to research well [not go down conspiracy rabbit holes]). Next, I created my own particular value/desire. I'm a professional writer, so I know that writer's block is cured by lowering your expectations because you know the secret to writing is rewriting. Same in life. The "rough draft" is rough and full of misspellings and detours and so on. You will have to rewrite, rewrite, rewrite. And it will get better every time. Keep it small, because the desire to make it large is mostly cultural manipulation and we've already determined that is bad for us. Celebrate every tiny step at least as hard as you've been celebrating disaster.
@@terryh.9238 That makes sense, and would explain why his content hasn't grabbed me as much anymore. I'm not at that place now, and reflecting on it, I should be grateful about that and that he's still making content even if it's not catered to me. Thanks for taking the time to respond!
Can we please all take a minute to appreciate the fuck out of what this man is doing, not only is he educating us, he is giving us advice and giving us clues as to how we can learn to be better versions of ourselves no matter our personality or personnal issues. People fucking need this shit! Even if they didn't care about understanding the people around them, they still be better off understanding more about themselves. With all my respect, thank you
1:09:30 interesting anecdotal advice about how long it takes. Half the time 1:54:03 love this jutsu 2:01:42 SOO TRUEE DR K SO TRUEE 2:22:10-2:27:30 love this rant 2:35:49 great practical advise about externalization as a key component for critical thinking and self-improvement 2:43:13-2:44:01 yea i gotta work on this one 2:50:41 noted
I love going to the library. Started it recently. Most times I'm not that productive and sometimes I read a bit. Still better than sitting behind my PC at home.
WHAT LOL. This would only be clickbait if people came looking for Dr. K’s downfall like some other UA-camrs! The ones that are ready to heal knew exactly what the title meant
Moving around a lot isn't listed in the main Adverse Childhood Experiences list... even death of a parent isn't listed there. they just have Divorced parents, parent goes to prison, parent with mental illness, parent with addiction, parent who abuses us, parent who is abused and we witness it, parent who neglects us.
2:25:18 "I just lost a game of DotA and the enemies are not ending, they are completely wasting my time, I'm aging and these fuckers don't end, my cell-my telomeres are getting shorter and I'm stuck here becuase they're not ending" I'm dying bro dr. K you are too real for this man💀💀
I’m 19 too and boy am I grateful for yall bc my family situation just got more complicated and my samskaras started beating my ass to a pulp at work yesterday
Noone asked, but the place I'm in goes like this "everything that is or has been bad in my life is my fault, and I've never forgiven myself for it" self hate is rough, the longer it goes the stronger it gets...at this point it's stronger than the rest of me I recently took stock of things my self hate has cost me and it's a lot.... More than I can ever forgive myself for. Also doc is really hard selling the spending money on yourself....I quit therapy last week because it cost too much I guess I can't get anything right 😂
Personal Note: 1:51:55 this is important. I am not a kid anymore. Whenever I am in the presence of my emotion such as intense fear. I lost sight that I am an adult. I also lost sight of time. The fear makes me feel that I am 6 years old under the pressure of my parents. Either I survive with my parents or living in the streets. that was my biggest fear. Now I am living in the street of my own using my own money but the fear of my own little me. I need to train my awareness that I am an adult. 2:00:15 yeah. that makes sense. Whenever I am interested with someone, my body response was just to run away to safety. The safety of being alone and not in the presence of someone that I am interested in. The interest is paired with the fear. the fear is being taught from my mom that having my own desire is dangerous because my mom projected her dissatisfaction of her life to me. My desires will be interpreted as a roadblock for other to achieve her "success" through me because if I don't become what she wants, that is not align with her definition of success. 2:02:37 this statement hits so hard. I have time and resources now. 2:36:40 when I am thinking. I am not recruiting sensory into consideration. My data is incomplete. 2:38:02 separate out generative and critical thinking. When I am generating, it won't be critical. when I am critical, I won't generate anything.
To all who relates to these case studies. I wish I could recommend what I had done outright to change my perspective of life, but it all depends on the mindset you have going into it, but something as little as knowing all the nutrient level of your health can change how much energy life takes from you. Psychedelics are dangerous for people going in afraid, or that don't feel safe. For me I had returned my soul back outside, and then felt ready to tackle programming. Dr. K- "if at first you don't succeed, try it a different way if at first you do succeed, then try it again" This reminds me of the theory in momentum. momentum does not suggest there are opposing opposites of a postive/negative energy but a polarity. A polarity still being caused by the grief you have of building the momentum, not knowing what you're building. if people try again and build on the failure, that to me is the momentum of polarities being made. Their consciousness still resonating an energy that is killing them slowly. I know with what I experienced. Trying to look at the world new is part of every conscious moment of qualia. I hope everyone figures a way to connect with their minds, and appreciate, and feel more of their consciousness.
I just think everything I touch turns to shit, everything I try goes wrong, and everything I've ever wanted I will never have. I don't think it's some kind of conspiracy. I'm the problem. I just can't seem to fix it to the point that trying, at this point, is nothing but an exercise in futility.
I'll tell you my two for what that's worth: 1) "Ghosts of Saint-Pierre" a novel of a man of Martinique in the time shortly before the volcanic eruption. It's written by one of my best writer friends and based on his grandfather's life. 2) "Inside the O'Briens" a New York Times best seller about a family dealing with Huntington's Disease. My son has Huntington's Disease, inherited from his father (my ex).
I had a controlling, tiger mom who was very toxic and somewhat abusive in my childhood. I'm in my 30s now and even though shes not around anymore (may she rest in peace), the things she used to tell me turned into my inner voice towards myself so shes still controlling my life today even though shes not around. I have PTSD from my childhood and college. I don't think the setting boundaries technique at 1:58:36 would've worked against my mom. The reason is that I recall vividly in elementary school, she'd always threaten to kill herself while screaming at the top of her lungs while grabbing a knife from the knife drawer. She'd blame me for trying to end her life and calling me a bad son. This was always after she'd chase me down and beat me for either not getting straight A's in school or for disobeying her by visiting my cousins at their house. But I never got straight A's so this was always a common occurrence from ages 7-14.
I feel like video games have taken away my life or from i should be doing. Ive thrown away multiple consoles only to buy another one. When i dont have it, im bored and unhappy. But i just cant pry myself away to literally get ANYTHING done. What the hell do i do?
Hey Doc Why oh why do I refuse to do what will help me ⁉️ Most Gamers, Healthy or fucked, are one-quarter my age🤯😱 Stay in bed for 2mths. Have referral to new psychologist but I won't make contact, won't catch-up with my remaining friends, not unrealistically depressed, but completely overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done to get back on track Life is too hard
Gentleman, would you like to stay in bed for the rest of your life? Do not do all at once, do something. Go for a walk, make nice breakfast and go to bed. Tomorrow write one email or make one call. Then go to bed. Do not rush, just do something every day, not all of your chores. After some days you will have examples that you can do something. After that maybe give a call to your therapist. If you can't run forward, walk, if can't walk, crawl.
I kinda shared similar story with the mommy guy, but it's my grandma instead. luckily I rebelled even before she could push me any further. well it's the life or death situation for me, so of course I'd just do anything to liberate myself from that situation.
The compassion trick is awesome! Unfortunately, I feel like it doesn't work with an NPD mom. Your compassion comes off as you accepting that you're just another victimizer of her, and that you have to make it up to them by complying.
You can only be there for yourself. Work, work, work, to make you the intended target of your compassion. If you need guidance i recommend Little Shaman, Sam Vaknin, HG Tudor. The book ‘People of the Lie’ is an amazing book that helped me process my parents narc behavior. Best of luck living with your mom. It’s not forever. Don’t become cold like them.
43:07 so what do we do when our suffering and bad mental state comes from a chronic illness? Not that one but in general. I’ve really been struggling with this since 17 (21 now) and the last thing I needed to hear when I’m already very depressed is that there’s not much I can do about it (and basically no hope).
Hm. When Dr. K describes "mental karma", he describes mental habits. Isn't that called "vasana" ? In Dr. K's guide, the word "karma" is translated as "circumstance". I'm confused here...
I know this isn't psyche-based, but I'd love to ask him what social techniques he uses from his work that also transitions well outside of his job. I think his #1 answer would be just be a good listener, but I have noticed the way he responds to questions and I wonder how well that works in just regular life to whatever degree.
This was a fantastic stream. I really appreciate when Dr. K shares what he does in his own personal life. I never expected him of all people to fire up an FPS trainer to git gud at Deadlock, but he's a gamer just like the rest of us, trying to make the best out of his life. Genuinely considering what he wants to invest his time into and acting on it, even if it absolutely sucks. It really makes it all the more relatable. Thanks, Dr. K
If spending money on yourself is the best way you can do, why so many americans suffer lifelong school debt enslavement? Aren't that 250k before interest supposed to propel you in life?
That’s a systemic failure unique to the United States afaik. Maybe something similar is going on with the UK and EU but I’m not familiar with their education systems. It really is supposed to work like that and the cost was never supposed to be this high.
@@WASDLeftClick first degree is free in vast majority of EU. Uk is complicated, but they managed to subsidize their unis with money coming from international students, until recently.
I'm unsure if I'm an addict, but I use drugs weekly and want to quit completely. I manage to stay clean during the weekdays while working, but by day six or seven, stress or irritation triggers my urge to use again. I take 2MMC, which helps me feel relaxed and a bit euphoric, allowing me to either unwind or be productive. However, the next day, I feel defeated and resolve to do better the following week. I struggle to enjoy my weekends. I don’t think about drugs when I wake up, but by the afternoon and evening, it becomes difficult. I often run out of activities since I go to the gym in the morning and complete most of my tasks then. Can anyone share tips or techniques to help me break this cycle? Has anyone experienced something similar?
Terviseid austatud Dr - K . I have ptsd, adhd, and struggling with so many different things, yes, i feel usually that ,i have everything what i wanted, but I'm not really enjoying that kind , because this kind lifestyle what i love so,so many yearly. I'm really don't know what i want or need ? Maybe mental peace or who know
(sexual abuse victims please dont take this the wrong way xD) for me what really kicked it off was not saying "im fucked" because that made it an inherent part of the present that always follows. now it was "i got fucked" which means it happened to me. im not responsible to rervert time and change that, but to start healing up.
is there a TLDR for this? I’m not a gamer so a lot of the tangents and chat interactions make it hard for me to pick out the guidance from the general and likely fun hanging out.
Come on people we're only 5 minutes in and he actually has to explain the title?? 😅 If he was in actual trouble I would think that there would be a more elegant way he would have phrased it..
If you are a realist, there's only one belief you have about life and that's it, and since you know you can't change reality, you can only attempt to change yourself but sometimes that is hard as f*ck, to levels beyond comprehension.
1:52:00 him imitating a ranting mom was SO funny ti me because of how accurate it was. My mom is RELENTLESS and LOOKS for things to complain about. She goes on and on and on and on about how no one listens, how no one does whats theyre suppose to, how everything would make her life easier if we just did what we were told. Ugh, its exhausting, but that moment made it feel seen.
Something thats within me wants to live... yea the part of me that fears the pain of death, the uknowing of thereafter and the possibility i was wrong and wither wasted the only chance i had at 'something' and possibly pissed off some god. Yea lemme cling to that part of me GREAT ADVICE!!! WOW
Did you watch the segment where he talks about defaulting to reject help? Or the part about how it’s very rarely as screwed up or negative as most believe? If the idea of “your body wants to live” isn’t good enough, what will be? If your life is truly, undeniably, in every aspect humanely possible, without a shadow of a doubt completely negative, with not a single ounce of joy or happiness ever felt at any point, then I don’t know what to tell ya. Not trying to be rude, but there is nothing anyone can do to help you if you keep that mindset of “no one can help me”, and then be sad when no one can. I understand depression and other mental illnesses are an absolute pain, but it’s your mindset first and foremost. If you rut yourself into believing that you are unsalvageable, then you only perpetuate a self-fulfilling prophecy.
About the “capital investment” part. I’ve noticed a lot of self help grifters will use this an excuse to oversell people on useless courses. People like Grant and Dan Lok would sell people “millionaire mindset courses”. Instead invest it in things like a gym membership, cooking classes or a skill your work suggests. Anything you wanna improve at or find fun. I’ve learnt it doesn’t have to always be this highly productive thing valued by society, improve at things you enjoy.
Hey there, I am the guy who posted about how I’m struggling with everything at 19. The thing I like the most about Dr. K is that he actually understands a lot of societal problems that plays a role in mental health struggles rather than just giving google advice like “just keep trying” he sees it differently and even acknowledged that simply just people to keep trying and hope for the best is not good advice and could actually lower your confidence is success is low. That’s what’s been happening with me. I’ve been told to just keep trying which I have been doing but I still have had no luck and it’s damaged my confidence a lot. In fact what led me to writing that post was that I received a rejection from a position from Target which I actually felt confident about getting and it stung. I heard it’s the job market too since someone has been declined from McDonald’s. It’s very harsh out there and I feel a lot of stress from it. Thank you Dr. K for sharing this and trying to understand my point of view, really made my day
I was unemployed with undiagnosed ADHD and unhealed childhood trauma and it was rejection hell for years. I didn't even know what I didn't know about how job searching is supposed to go. I didn't know you needed cover letters and once you get to an interview how to be socially adept enough to get hired. I didn't even apply for many jobs because job searching was ADHD hell and I was addicted to everything else on the internet instead.
Dr K was rejected from 140 medical schools i think he said.
But something eventually clicked and all you need is one place to accept you/ hire you for everything in your life from that point forward to change. If you can figure out why McDonald's and Target might've rejected you -- you seem overqualified on your resume or you lack social skills etc and try to fix that issue for the next time you apply to another place, or if you play more of a numbers game and acknowledge the hard work of applying to 10 different local fast food chains and getting rejected by all of them but it did the work to try your best and apply, and you learned from the experience of doing the resume and getting some interviews and from there you think you'll be more prepared for the next 10 and you keep going, eventually one of them will accept you. And you can learn from the job and be so much more skilled the next time you apply somewhere else. Volunteer work can also be amazing on your resume and amazing at helping you build so many skills and they often have a lower bar for accepting people vs rejecting them than jobs. They'll take every volunteer they can get a lot of places.
Things got way better for me eventually. I'm not saying new, different obstacles didn't cross my path. But things can change all at once if you keep giving life opportunities to help you out. Your luck can turn around. Your skills can improve. Etc.
My apologies if this seems like a "just keep trying" advice thing. I hope my comments are more nuanced than that. Try something else. Don't keep trying the same thing. And like Dr K said, don't just ignore how it feels harder and harder. You have to approach it differently.
Your post made my day. Thank you. It said everything I wanted to say. It’s like there’s still a 19 year old inside me and I’m already 45.
I used to stock shelves at Target for a year. Getting rejected from Target is a blessing in disguise.
Hey man, I graduated college in 2008 with a 2.2 GPA. Economic recession coupled with my very poor academic choices gave me little options in the open market.
I made a hard choice to join the Army as a college option OCS candidate. What that means is that I had to go through Basic Training at Ft. Benning with the other infantry entry candidates, go through another 12-week OCS course to earn my commission.
It was the greatest blessing in disguise because it gave me goals to elevate myself to. Each gateway I passed on my military journey was just that. It was difficult, but not un-achievable.
I say this because my path may not be yours, but everyone needs to have goals in their life they can achieve that elevate themselves to the person they need to be to not only reach them, but also earn the rewards.
You have the power and capability to define your path in life. Building your physical and mental resiliency is paramount to that success.
You’re never alone when you walk with God. Even if you struggle like me with my faith every day, acting as if God exists has worked out for me and I hope it can be for you.
God Bless and I hope this message finds you well.
@ntxsirenvators8983 Wishing you all the best and strength brother!
Thank you for taking the inspiring first step of making this honest and vulnerable post.
*Intro & Housekeeping:* 4:17
*Understanding Fatalism in the Community:*
- *Community Feedback and Ownership:* 19:48
- *Addressing Negativity and Rejection of Help:* 22:16
*Case Study 1 - "Please Convince Me to Have Hope":* 23:19
- *The Need for Hope and the Desire to Live:* 26:59
- *The Energy Investment in a "Worthless Life":* 31:44
- *Recognizing the Drive to Improve:* 32:16
- *The Importance of Critical Thinking:* 35:21
- *Identifying Contradictions in Thought Processes:* 39:26
- *Understanding Help-Rejecting Systems:* 41:49
- *The Power of Being the Problem:* 43:35
- *Mental Karma - The Importance of Mental Actions:* 46:19
- *Responding to Impulses and Desires:* 53:51
- *The World Isn't Against You, But It May Have Been:* 55:18
- *Changing Your Response to Circumstances:* 57:53
- *Seeking Sustained Help and Support:* 59:43
*Case Study 2 - "Life is a Huge Disappointment":* 1:06:31
- *The Snowball Effect of Success and Failure:* 1:08:14
- *The Futility of "Just Keep Trying":* 1:10:45
- *"If At First You Don't Succeed, Try It a Different Way":* 1:12:58
- *The Increasing Rate of Rejection in Modern Life:* 1:16:12
- *Focusing on Improvement, Not Outcomes:* 1:22:51
- *Perception is Reality - Control Your Inputs:* 1:30:59
- *Set Yourself Up for a Better Tomorrow:* 1:34:28
*Case Study 3 - "How to Feel Good About Myself":* 1:37:58
- *The Impact of Controlling Parents:* 1:39:14
- *The Cycle of Pushing and Atrophy:* 1:45:05
- *Taking Responsibility and Tolerating Disappointment:* 1:47:53
- *The Power of Compassion and Firm Boundaries:* 1:51:26
*Self-Improvement as a Burden:*
- *The Limitations of Self-Help Content:* 2:04:31
- *The Importance of Action and Investment:* 2:06:45
- *Investing in Yourself - Time, Energy, and Resources:* 2:09:34
- *The Value of Suffering for Improvement:* 2:11:53
- *Finding Balance and Prioritizing Your Own Needs:* 2:42:54
*Closing Thoughts and Q&A:*
- *Prioritizing Internal Change and Externalization:* 2:35:48
- *The Importance of External Perspectives:* 2:38:22
- *Using Suffering as a Resource for Growth:* 2:49:51
- *Thank You and Closing Remarks:* 2:52:58
This should be pinned. Thank you
o7
thank you for this! o7
You’re a hero, o7
Thank you very much.
I am a 29 y.o. woman from a non-english speaking country, indifferent to videogames, conventionally attractive and happily married. I may not be your target audience, but I had a very long term depression, once I was volunteerly hospitalized and one psychiatrist shared the link to Doctor K's video about fixing sleep schedule. I follow this channel for a year and what I learnt is helping me a lot, I try to practice this in life not just watch.
Thank you, Doctor and good luck to all of the community in making our lives better and healthier
"one psychiatrist shared the link to Doctor K's video"
- That's cool :)
Yeah, the naming of this channel is a bit unfortunate. It's purely a historical legacy at this point. Dr. K has since expanded his efforts to all kinds of mental health challenges, not just gaming addiction.
That’s awesome, I’m happy you’ve made improvements!
Thank you for saying it can be terminal instead of being toxically positive. There's a big difference between saying "don't lose hope, it's gonna get better" and "yes it sucks, but there's still hope".
Something I think about often when watching Dr. K's videos is how many of these struggles with mental health would exist today if today's young adult population had the same socioeconomic mobility and stability as older generations had at the same age.
For the proverbial older person who says they had it just as rough-go look up median housing prices: median income ratios over time. Not to mention the fact that everything from an academic and professional standpoint has gotten order of magnitudes more competitive. For example, I have a relative who is in their late-30s who is an anesthesiologist. They told me (though hesitantly) that they likely would not have been able to match into the same specialty given the level of competition there is today compared to just around a decade ago. It seems like we're all working more and more for less and less, and you just have to think there has to be a point of critical mass.
I agree with you completely! And, I know for me, focusing on how fucked our system is, makes taking action to improve my life feel pointless. However, pretending everything is fine with where our current society is headed is delusional.
I'm not sure how to reconcile these two things.
Yeah, recent TED talk of Scott Galloway has a lot more examples of everything costing more...
@@hungryghost-90burn is and everything else down
@@Hexanitrobenzeneit ain't supported by data. It a political speech, not scientific. He basically pulls graphs out of his ass and never defines his categories (like a generation) or control groups.
Vote.
I feel f***ed by this: I was abducted in addiction, and escaped and got sober. So I figured that was clearly the worst behind me, like that was my life’s big f***ed challenge and I would finally be able to use my [pretty f***ing amazing] brain for something other than getting, using and getting more drugs. Instead, after 6 months of being aware I was in severe shock, I started experiencing severe dissociation, dissociative fugues, daily amnesia, and losing time- 5 hours a day on average but sometimes up to three days. My brain that had done me so well in surviving a decade+ of the insane internal war and the excruciating external consequences of addiction was a stranger to me. Or should I say strangers, because a month or two into this new experience of myself, I was diagnosed with Dissociative Identity Disorder. I lost my fiancé, friends, family, my fortitude and how full of life I was… and a left with the exact sentiment you’re addressing here: I’m fucked. Somehow I still have managed to circumnavigate the temptation of falling back into drugs and the bouts of severe depression that accompanied the more severe episodes I experienced early on. But that was SIX YEARS AGO. I have always had through the roof ADHD, been too smart for my own good and struggled with true vulnerability necessary for healing… but not only have those things led to some serious maladaptive mechanisms of the mind and behaviours, now I’m in my early 30s with no job, no friends, no romantic prospects (because why would I force myself like half baked bread down someone’s throat under the guise of sustenance for a relationship, I know I need quite a bit more time in the oven before I’m capable of offering that) and no real life. I was nothing like this before. So yeah, “f***ed” sounds about right. I’m just starting watching, so I will comment if anything piques my interest as a tool I could use because I’m nothing if not motivated to move forward… but hopelessness colours much of my world these days. I’m not depressed (we all have our days) and I refuse to give up, but I’m just… feeling fucked. Seems like the stream was ruled perfectly because I can’t truly encompass it more succinctly than that. Thank you for reading and my heart goes out to anyone else feeling this sentiment, regardless of why and what your life looks like… your feelings are valid and we all deserve a little compassion and help sometimes.
Xoxo, Gossip Girl.
This is a very interesting and thought provoking read. Replying so that I can get back on this.
Feel like I wrote this. Literally almost word for word the exact same story with me. Except we never actually got engaged ...
You are not alone, whatever that may be worth. 💝
“If one person that you meet is an asshole, they’re the asshole. If everyone that you meet is an asshole - you’re the asshole.” Dr.K 2K24
😂😂😂 love this
😂
I feel like so many of our problems are rooted or merely exist becoz of a certain family member. It’s like we had this person we expected would be our safe space but instead they chose to wreck havoc in our life than actually respect our beliefs our trying to understand us.
Today’s my birthday and seeing how my parents haven’t even acknowledged it is internally welling up tears in me, although I refuse to let other people’s behaviours overrule my emotional well being, it’s still something that lingers. Had all of us a deep connection with even one of our parents, I’m pretty sure 90% of our problems would either not exist, or would have very little damage on our mental and physical well being.
Unfortunately, it's not that simple. I have decent connection with my father and good connection with my mother, and I still have mental health problems and NEET lifestyle. Messy place the human mind is...
kind of silly to call this clickbait. i only had to glance at the title to know this is a video for me
That's right, I knew it is about me right away too LOL
That whole 5 minutes was kind of annoying
Yeah was completely obvious to me too (even though it doesn't apply to me)... But I've been watching this channel for a while so might be I'm just used to their style. I didn't even get what the misunderstanding was at first.
Agree
@@finrazielProbably some people thinking the title was about Dr. K
The way I integrate your content is to write things/concepts you say that stands out to me and write about it in my journal.
I also talk about certain things you say that strikes a chord w me to my therapist.
My self-imposed rule is that I only put self-help videos on when I'm doing work of some kind. Cleaning, cooking, walking, doesn't matter - I just can't let myself sit on the couch and watch content like this.
That's a good rule
Self help videos while doing something productive helps me as well. It's about taking small gains, not the entire mountain at one time.
Why self help videos tho? This self help shit isnt useful imo unless you are actively listening and making changes in your lives/thinking. Dr k even says this in this very stream lol
Why can't you let yourself watch this on your couch?
@@kushalramakanth7922 ... which I am. Thank you for your input.
No one wants to die, some just don't want to live the life they're living, and don't see an end to it.
30:51 oh wow this reminds me of an episode of M*A*S*H! A soldier was trying to commit suicide; Sherman T Potter prove to him that he wanted to live by forcing him in a fight with the gas meant to knock someone out..
The guy panicked and Potter off and had his fists up. And that's when the colonel told him "that's the spirit! That's the part of you that wants to live now hold on to that!"
Great scene from the show
Thank you for making this video! Please make more content on people feeling "fucked" or lost in life. This resontates with me a lot and is the content I need and would like to see from healthygamer.
The mom/controlling parent thing is also super common in Hispanic/Latino households. In my 20s in college, I had to deal with a lot of this and ended up getting through most of it by having really unpleasant arguments and finally just saying "I'm sorry you feel this way about x y z, but I need to learn how to be an adult." And it was uncomfortable, but it worked.
I always knew my parents are to blame for many things that fucked me up, but simply because I am autistic and they simply didn't want to believe their child is different. Of course they can't expect the same things from me.
But I keep learning about things they also did that can fuck me up as well.
Breaking off any communication and abandoning my family is like the best thing I did for my mental health so far.
1:13:00
"If first you don't succeed.. don't just try and try again; but try a different way!"
The correspondent is right about "the whole world being against him," in the sense Doc K describes -- advertising and entertainment and many cultural values are set up to tell you you are not enough, you are a loser, you are not making enough money, you don't have the right motivation, you don't value the right things, you don't belong to the right religion . . . etc. Also, you may have not been given a good start, good training, good support at a crucial time in your life. And it is absolutely true that, in that case, you will have a very hard time creating a stable life. So . . .what I do, for what is worth, is dismiss all these "training experiences" that were actually designed to manipulate me. I stopped watching television (especially television news -- I know how to research well [not go down conspiracy rabbit holes]). Next, I created my own particular value/desire. I'm a professional writer, so I know that writer's block is cured by lowering your expectations because you know the secret to writing is rewriting. Same in life. The "rough draft" is rough and full of misspellings and detours and so on. You will have to rewrite, rewrite, rewrite. And it will get better every time. Keep it small, because the desire to make it large is mostly cultural manipulation and we've already determined that is bad for us. Celebrate every tiny step at least as hard as you've been celebrating disaster.
"im aging, my telemeres are getting shorter" never change Dr. K 2:25:00
I love Dr. K's content but a lot of it is so serious. I want to hear him talk about the cultivation of fun, joy, and mirth in a healthy way.
i think the member's videos skew more in that direction. a lot of these videos are for people at rock bottom
@@terryh.9238 That makes sense, and would explain why his content hasn't grabbed me as much anymore. I'm not at that place now, and reflecting on it, I should be grateful about that and that he's still making content even if it's not catered to me.
Thanks for taking the time to respond!
Can we please all take a minute to appreciate the fuck out of what this man is doing, not only is he educating us, he is giving us advice and giving us clues as to how we can learn to be better versions of ourselves no matter our personality or personnal issues. People fucking need this shit! Even if they didn't care about understanding the people around them, they still be better off understanding more about themselves.
With all my respect, thank you
1:09:30 interesting anecdotal advice about how long it takes. Half the time
1:54:03 love this jutsu
2:01:42 SOO TRUEE DR K SO TRUEE
2:22:10-2:27:30 love this rant
2:35:49 great practical advise about externalization as a key component for critical thinking and self-improvement
2:43:13-2:44:01 yea i gotta work on this one
2:50:41 noted
I love going to the library. Started it recently. Most times I'm not that productive and sometimes I read a bit. Still better than sitting behind my PC at home.
Taco bell guy watching this video: "👁️👄👁️"
😂
You that guy and having fun or just fun and not him
Stream start 4:13
@@yoanageorgieva3068 thanks for the time stamp bro.😎👏
Music starts at 0:00
Thanks 👍
WHAT LOL. This would only be clickbait if people came looking for Dr. K’s downfall like some other UA-camrs! The ones that are ready to heal knew exactly what the title meant
Yeah haha they was getting their popcorn out for a minute
I am ever thankful for watching these videos to learn how I can talk to my struggling friends better that come to me for help and check myself.
Moving around a lot isn't listed in the main Adverse Childhood Experiences list... even death of a parent isn't listed there. they just have Divorced parents, parent goes to prison, parent with mental illness, parent with addiction, parent who abuses us, parent who is abused and we witness it, parent who neglects us.
2:25:18 "I just lost a game of DotA and the enemies are not ending, they are completely wasting my time, I'm aging and these fuckers don't end, my cell-my telomeres are getting shorter and I'm stuck here becuase they're not ending"
I'm dying bro dr. K you are too real for this man💀💀
Truly a 🐐. You changed the trajectory of my life man🙏🏻
Taco Bell guy is literally me, except I don't use reddit, or drive, or eat ungodly amounts of slop food, so not really me, but close enough.
I drive :sigma:
I’m 19 too and boy am I grateful for yall bc my family situation just got more complicated and my samskaras started beating my ass to a pulp at work yesterday
Noone asked, but the place I'm in goes like this "everything that is or has been bad in my life is my fault, and I've never forgiven myself for it" self hate is rough, the longer it goes the stronger it gets...at this point it's stronger than the rest of me I recently took stock of things my self hate has cost me and it's a lot.... More than I can ever forgive myself for. Also doc is really hard selling the spending money on yourself....I quit therapy last week because it cost too much I guess I can't get anything right 😂
Thanks dr K. for teaching me how to better flame my teammates in League of Legends
Personal Note:
1:51:55 this is important. I am not a kid anymore. Whenever I am in the presence of my emotion such as intense fear. I lost sight that I am an adult. I also lost sight of time. The fear makes me feel that I am 6 years old under the pressure of my parents. Either I survive with my parents or living in the streets. that was my biggest fear. Now I am living in the street of my own using my own money but the fear of my own little me. I need to train my awareness that I am an adult.
2:00:15 yeah. that makes sense. Whenever I am interested with someone, my body response was just to run away to safety. The safety of being alone and not in the presence of someone that I am interested in. The interest is paired with the fear. the fear is being taught from my mom that having my own desire is dangerous because my mom projected her dissatisfaction of her life to me. My desires will be interpreted as a roadblock for other to achieve her "success" through me because if I don't become what she wants, that is not align with her definition of success.
2:02:37 this statement hits so hard. I have time and resources now.
2:36:40 when I am thinking. I am not recruiting sensory into consideration. My data is incomplete.
2:38:02 separate out generative and critical thinking. When I am generating, it won't be critical. when I am critical, I won't generate anything.
One Love!
Always forward, never ever backward!!
☀️☀️☀️
💚💛❤️
🙏🏿🙏🙏🏼
imagine being a hater supposedly “clickbaited” into bettering your mental health
The new music playing before stream starts is so hype. Definitely raging to that at the HG ranch with y’all
To all who relates to these case studies. I wish I could recommend what I had done outright to change my perspective of life, but it all depends on the mindset you have going into it, but something as little as knowing all the nutrient level of your health can change how much energy life takes from you. Psychedelics are dangerous for people going in afraid, or that don't feel safe. For me I had returned my soul back outside, and then felt ready to tackle programming.
Dr. K-
"if at first you don't succeed, try it a different way
if at first you do succeed, then try it again"
This reminds me of the theory in momentum. momentum does not suggest there are opposing opposites of a postive/negative energy but a polarity. A polarity still being caused by the grief you have of building the momentum, not knowing what you're building. if people try again and build on the failure, that to me is the momentum of polarities being made. Their consciousness still resonating an energy that is killing them slowly.
I know with what I experienced. Trying to look at the world new is part of every conscious moment of qualia. I hope everyone figures a way to connect with their minds, and appreciate, and feel more of their consciousness.
I just don't know who I am anymore. Nothing I have in life is from me.
soooooooooooo informative, thank you Dr. K
I just think everything I touch turns to shit, everything I try goes wrong, and everything I've ever wanted I will never have. I don't think it's some kind of conspiracy. I'm the problem. I just can't seem to fix it to the point that trying, at this point, is nothing but an exercise in futility.
i could listen to this man for days... it's incredible that I watched the whole three hours.
57:23 story of my life. Some people really struggle to understand this.
Can you list the two books you’re reading right now? “On writing well” & what book by chuck palahniuk?
I'll tell you my two for what that's worth: 1) "Ghosts of Saint-Pierre" a novel of a man of Martinique in the time shortly before the volcanic eruption. It's written by one of my best writer friends and based on his grandfather's life. 2) "Inside the O'Briens" a New York Times best seller about a family dealing with Huntington's Disease. My son has Huntington's Disease, inherited from his father (my ex).
"consider this"
lol he thinks the title was clickbait but it was the perfect explanation tbh
I had a controlling, tiger mom who was very toxic and somewhat abusive in my childhood. I'm in my 30s now and even though shes not around anymore (may she rest in peace), the things she used to tell me turned into my inner voice towards myself so shes still controlling my life today even though shes not around. I have PTSD from my childhood and college. I don't think the setting boundaries technique at 1:58:36 would've worked against my mom. The reason is that I recall vividly in elementary school, she'd always threaten to kill herself while screaming at the top of her lungs while grabbing a knife from the knife drawer. She'd blame me for trying to end her life and calling me a bad son. This was always after she'd chase me down and beat me for either not getting straight A's in school or for disobeying her by visiting my cousins at their house. But I never got straight A's so this was always a common occurrence from ages 7-14.
I feel like video games have taken away my life or from i should be doing. Ive thrown away multiple consoles only to buy another one. When i dont have it, im bored and unhappy. But i just cant pry myself away to literally get ANYTHING done. What the hell do i do?
Not clickbaity at all lol don’t know where that came from
Hey Doc
Why oh why do I refuse to do what will help me ⁉️
Most Gamers, Healthy or fucked, are one-quarter my age🤯😱
Stay in bed for 2mths. Have referral to new psychologist but I won't make contact, won't catch-up with my remaining friends, not unrealistically depressed, but completely overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done to get back on track
Life is too hard
You're 80+ years old?
Feel dat brah..
@@Hemlocker several years off
Gentleman, would you like to stay in bed for the rest of your life? Do not do all at once, do something. Go for a walk, make nice breakfast and go to bed. Tomorrow write one email or make one call. Then go to bed. Do not rush, just do something every day, not all of your chores. After some days you will have examples that you can do something. After that maybe give a call to your therapist. If you can't run forward, walk, if can't walk, crawl.
95K views and 3.3K likes for a 3 hour talk after 2 days!! Positivity needed and much appreciated. Thanks Dr K.
I kinda shared similar story with the mommy guy, but it's my grandma instead.
luckily I rebelled even before she could push me any further.
well it's the life or death situation for me, so of course I'd just do anything to liberate myself from that situation.
Accidentally pressed 2 x speed and he started sounding like Ben Shapiro
I understood the title no issue. Not clickbait.
1:15:00 😮Wow didn't see that coming, I imagined it'd be the opposite case. That just gave me more hope in the industry.
Hot diggity, one of the finest rants I’ve ever seen but dude can taaaaaaaaaaallllkkk,l…not criticizing, genuinely impressed
Great video as always. Got some insights out of it
Dr. K., you're a good man. Sending love from southeast Europe, Croatia. ❤❤❤
The compassion trick is awesome!
Unfortunately, I feel like it doesn't work with an NPD mom. Your compassion comes off as you accepting that you're just another victimizer of her, and that you have to make it up to them by complying.
You can only be there for yourself. Work, work, work, to make you the intended target of your compassion. If you need guidance i recommend Little Shaman, Sam Vaknin, HG Tudor. The book ‘People of the Lie’ is an amazing book that helped me process my parents narc behavior. Best of luck living with your mom. It’s not forever. Don’t become cold like them.
43:07 so what do we do when our suffering and bad mental state comes from a chronic illness? Not that one but in general. I’ve really been struggling with this since 17 (21 now) and the last thing I needed to hear when I’m already very depressed is that there’s not much I can do about it (and basically no hope).
Look up the vid of drk on chaos and control (he has a spiral image lines on thumbnail ) he address the exact answer to your question .
40:00 Look at the contradictions in my own thought process
41:00 is "but" a problem to be solved, an obstacle to overcome, or a reason to quit?
"HIV of the mind"
Yeah I felt like this. It's terminal lol
That was not clickbait. Since it's in quotation marks, I knew exactly what you meant. Thank you so much for your work. These videos are great too.
I think they added that later.
52:34 life-changing realization
Thanks Dr. K ❤
Hm. When Dr. K describes "mental karma", he describes mental habits. Isn't that called "vasana" ? In Dr. K's guide, the word "karma" is translated as "circumstance". I'm confused here...
I know this isn't psyche-based, but I'd love to ask him what social techniques he uses from his work that also transitions well outside of his job. I think his #1 answer would be just be a good listener, but I have noticed the way he responds to questions and I wonder how well that works in just regular life to whatever degree.
2:29:42 Dr.K murdered us with that one XD
"Who's this Dr K guy?" Lmao that's amazing!! 😂😂
Great strean with lots of practical stuff. Good job dr k and HG :)
Might be a weird question, but... where can I get an MP3 of the song that plays before Dr K shows up on stream?
Tried Shazaming it?
Rip it youtube to mp3
Yt-dlp
This was a fantastic stream. I really appreciate when Dr. K shares what he does in his own personal life.
I never expected him of all people to fire up an FPS trainer to git gud at Deadlock, but he's a gamer just like the rest of us, trying to make the best out of his life. Genuinely considering what he wants to invest his time into and acting on it, even if it absolutely sucks. It really makes it all the more relatable.
Thanks, Dr. K
46:27 After years pf therapy, I can confirm this is true! I had no clue before
45:00
1:13:00 (positive deviance / failure debuff)
1:18:00
1:44:00
2:35:45
2:47:40
If spending money on yourself is the best way you can do, why so many americans suffer lifelong school debt enslavement? Aren't that 250k before interest supposed to propel you in life?
That’s a systemic failure unique to the United States afaik. Maybe something similar is going on with the UK and EU but I’m not familiar with their education systems. It really is supposed to work like that and the cost was never supposed to be this high.
@@WASDLeftClick first degree is free in vast majority of EU. Uk is complicated, but they managed to subsidize their unis with money coming from international students, until recently.
"I feel like I was born to self destruct." Metallica has an album called Hardwired To Self-Destruct.
Dr. K flexing on me about trash talking noobs on the internet was not on my bingo card
I'm unsure if I'm an addict, but I use drugs weekly and want to quit completely. I manage to stay clean during the weekdays while working, but by day six or seven, stress or irritation triggers my urge to use again.
I take 2MMC, which helps me feel relaxed and a bit euphoric, allowing me to either unwind or be productive. However, the next day, I feel defeated and resolve to do better the following week.
I struggle to enjoy my weekends. I don’t think about drugs when I wake up, but by the afternoon and evening, it becomes difficult. I often run out of activities since I go to the gym in the morning and complete most of my tasks then.
Can anyone share tips or techniques to help me break this cycle? Has anyone experienced something similar?
Terviseid austatud Dr - K . I have ptsd, adhd, and struggling with so many different things, yes, i feel usually that ,i have everything what i wanted, but I'm not really enjoying that kind , because this kind lifestyle what i love so,so many yearly. I'm really don't know what i want or need ? Maybe mental peace or who know
So incredibly good 🙆🏼♂️❤️
thumbnail is super relatable. being born to self destruct
Not me watching this sitting in a Taco Bell
Dr. K explaining for two minutes that he's not f'd in the intro
And then there are people that will say the same shit, but actually are against you.
(sexual abuse victims please dont take this the wrong way xD) for me what really kicked it off was not saying "im fucked" because that made it an inherent part of the present that always follows. now it was "i got fucked" which means it happened to me. im not responsible to rervert time and change that, but to start healing up.
Rx Positive emotion with firm boundaries 01:57:22
2:29:18 Dr. K applies lethal bleed stack 💀🩸
is there a TLDR for this? I’m not a gamer so a lot of the tangents and chat interactions make it hard for me to pick out the guidance from the general and likely fun hanging out.
Come on people we're only 5 minutes in and he actually has to explain the title?? 😅
If he was in actual trouble I would think that there would be a more elegant way he would have phrased it..
1:59:58 This hit me man. So so true. Sigh
If you are a realist, there's only one belief you have about life and that's it, and since you know you can't change reality, you can only attempt to change yourself but sometimes that is hard as f*ck, to levels beyond comprehension.
The fact that dr.k spent the first 5 minutes talking about clickbait had be cackling 😂😂
15 hours of unproductive entertainment a week seems wild to me as an adult.
1:26:35 there actually is an enemy like this in bloodborne.
Just listening to this while im about to go too the area these appear in 😂
1:52:00 him imitating a ranting mom was SO funny ti me because of how accurate it was. My mom is RELENTLESS and LOOKS for things to complain about. She goes on and on and on and on about how no one listens, how no one does whats theyre suppose to, how everything would make her life easier if we just did what we were told.
Ugh, its exhausting, but that moment made it feel seen.
Traumatized at scale. Life in the 2020s.
That intro song is baller
Something thats within me wants to live... yea the part of me that fears the pain of death, the uknowing of thereafter and the possibility i was wrong and wither wasted the only chance i had at 'something' and possibly pissed off some god. Yea lemme cling to that part of me GREAT ADVICE!!! WOW
Did you watch the segment where he talks about defaulting to reject help? Or the part about how it’s very rarely as screwed up or negative as most believe? If the idea of “your body wants to live” isn’t good enough, what will be? If your life is truly, undeniably, in every aspect humanely possible, without a shadow of a doubt completely negative, with not a single ounce of joy or happiness ever felt at any point, then I don’t know what to tell ya.
Not trying to be rude, but there is nothing anyone can do to help you if you keep that mindset of “no one can help me”, and then be sad when no one can. I understand depression and other mental illnesses are an absolute pain, but it’s your mindset first and foremost. If you rut yourself into believing that you are unsalvageable, then you only perpetuate a self-fulfilling prophecy.
High-five!
I can’t be the only one thinking the title said
«I’m fucking, now what?»
Your comment fits your profile pic
About the “capital investment” part. I’ve noticed a lot of self help grifters will use this an excuse to oversell people on useless courses. People like Grant and Dan Lok would sell people “millionaire mindset courses”. Instead invest it in things like a gym membership, cooking classes or a skill your work suggests. Anything you wanna improve at or find fun. I’ve learnt it doesn’t have to always be this highly productive thing valued by society, improve at things you enjoy.
When your brain tricks you that you have nothing you enjoy besides mind less consumption