Dr. Paul Conti: How to Build and Maintain Healthy Relationships | Huberman Lab Guest Series

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  • Опубліковано 8 тра 2024
  • This is episode 3 of a 4-part special series on mental health with Dr. Paul Conti, M.D., a psychiatrist who did his medical training at Stanford School of Medicine and residency at Harvard Medical School. He is the author of the book, “Trauma: The Invisible Epidemic.” Dr. Conti explains how to find, develop and strengthen healthy relationships - including romantic relationships, work and colleague relationships, and friendships. He explains a roadmap of the conscious and unconscious mind that can allow anyone to navigate conflicts better and set healthy boundaries in relationships. We also discuss common features of unhealthy relationships and clinically supported tools for dealing with relationship insecurity, excessive anxiety, past traumas, manipulation and abuse. Dr. Conti explains how, in healthy relationships, there emerges a dynamic of the mutually generative “us” and how to continually improve that dynamic. The next episode in this special series explores true self-care, which can be cultivated through a process of building self-awareness along with other important practices.
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    Dr. Paul Conti
    Website: drpaulconti.com
    Pacific Premier Group: pacificpremiergroup.com
    Trauma: The Invisible Epidemic: How Trauma Works and How We Can Heal From It: amzn.to/3GVLHXw
    LinkedIn: / dr-paul-m-conti-845074216
    Resources
    Guest Series | Dr. Paul Conti: How to Understand & Assess Your Mental Health (Episode 1): hubermanlab.com/guest-series-...
    Guest Series | Dr. Paul Conti: How to Improve Your Mental Health (Episode 2): hubermanlab.com/guest-series-...
    The Iceberg Model: hubermanlab.com/wp-content/up...
    Pillars of Mental Health: hubermanlab.com/wp-content/up...
    Timestamps
    00:00:00 Build Healthy Relationships
    00:02:04 Sponsors: BetterHelp & Waking Up
    00:05:01 Healthiest Self in Relationships
    00:10:51 Structure & Function of Self
    00:15:44 Relationships, Levels of Emergence
    00:22:48 Generative Drive in Relationships
    00:35:00 Sponsor: AG1
    00:36:26 Generative Drive, Aggressive Drive, Pleasure Drive
    00:45:16 Romantic Relationships & Matched Generative Drives, Trauma Bonds
    00:53:05 Generative Drive Expression, Libido, Giving & Taking
    01:04:29 Sponsor: Eight Sleep
    01:05:50 Generative Drive in Partnerships
    01:11:16 Libido, Avoidance & Working through Barriers
    01:18:02 Repeating Bad Relationship Patterns, Repetition Compulsion
    01:29:23 Narcissism, Dependence, Attachment Insecurity
    01:34:10 Abusive Relationships, Demoralization
    01:39:37 Oppressors, Darkness, Hope & Change
    01:48:08 Work Relationships, Oppression & Accountability
    01:53:53 Jealousy vs. Envy, Narcissism
    01:59:13 Power Dynamics in Relationships
    02:05:54 Giving vs. Taking in Relationships
    02:09:39 Transactions & Relationships; Family & Generative Drive; Flexibility
    02:19:47 Relationships & Kindergarten
    02:23:04 Anxiety in Relationships, Communication
    02:31:32 The “Magic Bridge of the Us”
    02:37:09 Mentalization, Getting into Another’s Mindset; Navigating Conflict
    02:46:51 Healthy Boundaries
    02:52:08 Self-Awareness, Mentalization
    02:55:28 “Broken Compass” & Self Inquiry, “Map” Analogy
    03:02:25 Zero-Cost Support, UA-cam Feedback, Spotify & Apple Reviews, Sponsors, Social Media, Momentous, Neural Network Newsletter
    Title Card Photo Credit: Mike Blabac - www.blabacphoto.com
    The Huberman Lab podcast is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute the practice of medicine, nursing or other professional health care services, including the giving of medical advice, and no doctor/patient relationship is formed. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast is at the user’s own risk. The content of this podcast is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their health care professionals for any such conditions.
  • Наука та технологія

КОМЕНТАРІ • 606

  • @miabdin
    @miabdin 7 місяців тому +274

    Imagine the world if they had these sort of discussions in schools...thank you both for taking the time to share this valuable information!

    • @Lenoxygen
      @Lenoxygen 7 місяців тому

      Less discussions; more woke left moralists.

    • @jaredthegentile
      @jaredthegentile 7 місяців тому

      @@Lenoxygendude this sheet wasn't never discussed in schools watchyu on, playa?? c'mon now!

    • @classicadministrator2408
      @classicadministrator2408 7 місяців тому

      school is a scam parents agree to because the system is just way too big

    • @philgagne4741
      @philgagne4741 6 місяців тому +1

      well ... Dr. Paul Conti, M.D., is a psychiatrist who did his medical training at Stanford SCHOOL of Medicine and residency at Harvard Medical SCHOOL... Which makes me believe they actually do have those sorts of discussions in school!☝

    • @alejandrabustamante889
      @alejandrabustamante889 5 місяців тому

      @@jaredthegentile 42:01 😮😮😮
      J

  • @sirawsome127
    @sirawsome127 7 місяців тому +240

    Dr. Conti and Dr. Huberman are a blessing to the world!

  • @me0101001000
    @me0101001000 7 місяців тому +85

    There is one nugget of advice which I was given not too long ago, which actually caused me to transfer PhD programs: "Don't work for someone you don't want to become." I want to be a professor, and my former supervisor's attitude towards research, teaching, and academia as a whole were absolutely antithetical to everything I believe. As prestigious as the position was, I could never produce anything I'd be proud of in that environment. So I'm restarting my PhD in the spring, under a supervisor whose values more closely align with mine. My example is specifically academic, but I'm sure this is true in industry as well.

    • @athinav.5995
      @athinav.5995 7 місяців тому +6

      I applaud your decision. Plus, you saved yourself from unecessary pain, walking around academic - narcissistic eggshells. Wishing you all the very best. ♥

    • @jesversusevil
      @jesversusevil 7 місяців тому

      This is a magnificent thought. Thank you.

    • @pepperrose467
      @pepperrose467 7 місяців тому +2

      Great decision. I left MIt for that reason and restarted my PhD elsewhere. It is a long road- but I graduated with my PhD and so I can tell you it is worth it. Good luck on your journey.

    • @kaybeejelly461
      @kaybeejelly461 2 місяці тому +1

      In a world that can be so noisy, it takes true strength to not only listen to your inner voice but to act upon it. People can take the time to listen and then never dare to act. Well done.

  • @prmft94123
    @prmft94123 7 місяців тому +91

    One thing that is becoming abundantly clear in these discussions is what truly good men you both are. Refreshing and so needed in our world.

    • @kssgpv
      @kssgpv Місяць тому +3

      Hahaha😂 that didn't age well

    • @wigoftsvi4522
      @wigoftsvi4522 Місяць тому +1

      You don't know anything about these men. You have listened to their words and you think you know them? Why would you draw such a conclusion based on listening to them speak for 3 hours? I am genuinely curious.

    • @prmft94123
      @prmft94123 Місяць тому

      @@wigoftsvi4522 To begin with, your statement that I "don't know anything about these men" is not true. I have been listening to Andrew Huberman's podcast for a couple of years now, and as a result do know quite a bit about him, his values, and the kind of person he is. As a mental health practitioner myself, I am trained to come to provisional conclusions based on a person's words as well as body language, their reputation, their actions. Dr. Conti is a skilled clinician, has impeccable credentials and a glowing reputation, and both men show considerable empathy, compassion and knowledge of the human psyche including strengths and weaknesses. I draw my conclusions based on many factors besides 3 hours of talk, (although there were really more like 12 because Dr. Huberman's series on mental health with Dr. Conti was in 4 parts). Like all of us, these men contain the worst and best aspects of what makes a human being, but they have chosen by their words and actions to cultivate the best qualities which help others and make the world a better place . In my opinion, however, it doesn't depend on the amount of time one hears another speak. Often I can tell a lot about a person after one sentence. For example, I can tell quite a bit about you by the question you ask.

  • @JacCichockiOfficial
    @JacCichockiOfficial 7 місяців тому +65

    Dr. Huberman, could you *please* do an episode on memory degeneration with age including Alzheimer's and dementia? I'm looking to understand and help my grandmother who just had her 90th birthday. Love your podcast! Thank you for all of your brilliant teaching!

    • @sitiimanina
      @sitiimanina 7 місяців тому +7

      Awesome suggestion

    • @carolinaandrade4114
      @carolinaandrade4114 6 місяців тому +4

      Hi! Don't know if you already know but there are some timestamps about this topic on his website that you could find interesting!

    • @CristinaCanchola-xx7kp
      @CristinaCanchola-xx7kp Місяць тому

      The lastest magazine from John’s Hopkins 12/19/24 edition is a great introduction to understanding dementia and all its forms specifically Alzheimer’s

  • @brianajane6079
    @brianajane6079 7 місяців тому +74

    Appreciate this episode so much. I love the idea of being with someone who wants to grow and heal with you-it suggests one does not need to be wholly and completely healed before they can be in a relationship-on the contrary-together you can bring great value to one another’s lives. I sent this to my 20 something nieces and feel it could save them a lot of grief.☺️ I can’t believe the wisdom and knowledge your podcast provides is free. Grateful to support this show.

    • @soapywater
      @soapywater 7 місяців тому

      That is true. We can always be more aware of the self and improve. But I don't know where the balance is, because there are times when there is too much trauma brought to the relationship. Victim mentality and what not. Should one put up with toxic or negative behaviour and walk away and mentalise away...

    • @l.d.a.2987
      @l.d.a.2987 6 місяців тому

      Yeah. An idea. That’s all it is. Some philosophy. It’s absolutely his fantasy. And yours. And everybody’s. You’d be more likely to marry Elvis. And he’s dead!

  • @VeronicaNicole4778
    @VeronicaNicole4778 7 місяців тому +483

    There’s something about the way dr. Conti speaks that’s so incredibly calm, reassuring and caring. I just love these discussions. They are so valuable!!! Thank you 💞

    • @skillzzz
      @skillzzz 7 місяців тому +10

      I totally agree. I was thinking the same thing

    • @stephenr85
      @stephenr85 7 місяців тому +11

      I've gleaned a lot from them and have already been re-listening to 1 & 2; however, Conti's unpleasant facial expression in the thumbnails throws me off everytime lol...

    • @schminktisch
      @schminktisch 7 місяців тому +9

      I agree. And he’s hot! 😂

    • @skillzzz
      @skillzzz 7 місяців тому +1

      @@schminktisch lol I know!

    • @trillyfly7805
      @trillyfly7805 7 місяців тому +15

      I love this thread.😂 im not ashamed to admit he's been my psychiatrist for over a decade. He is really humble and kind. I'm grateful for his intervention in my life. I'm in a much better place than I would've been otherwise.
      Idk why these videos came up in youtube recommendations.
      I didn't realize he was so popular!
      I look forward to listening to them though.

  • @AwareParenting
    @AwareParenting 7 місяців тому +22

    This series is gold. A whole new level of knowing that I don't really know myself and a deepening of my desire to know myself better. Huge thanks Paul and Andrew and team.

  • @DWBincharleston
    @DWBincharleston 7 місяців тому +15

    I can’t tell you how much this series has added to my life. Thank you for all of your time and effort. It mean so much !

  • @RockyoLP
    @RockyoLP 7 місяців тому +175

    You two are truly a gift to humanity, I always admire the sheer amount of wisdom delivered through your podcast episodes, especially in this four-part series. It's literally a life-hack to know Andrew Huberman and follow his/their advice.

  • @DanielKrikun
    @DanielKrikun 7 місяців тому +5

    Requests to Prof. Huberman:
    1. Please do an episode on dreams, day-dreaming and, especially so, lucid dreaming
    2. Is there any known benefit to weighted blankets for sleep, any specific info on how to use them?
    3. A lot of people have asked this in other places, but how to deal with early waking up: should we push ourselves into trying to get back to sleep, should we wake up kinda slowly easy going till the natural sun light, or go all-in on coffee, cold water etc. to start the day?

  • @zohaln6419
    @zohaln6419 7 місяців тому +72

    oof each episode gets better and better! I wish more people would watch this series, the world would be better for it. Thank you both!

  • @jd32k
    @jd32k 7 місяців тому +58

    "Do something cognitively challanging for at least 30 minutes each morning" from episode one. And i love it.
    Episode one was phenomenal with such amazing key tips and reminders on the simple pillars of wellbeing we seem to forget sometimes. Cannot wait to listen to this one and see what i get from it. The last one completely redirected my mind back toward settingvnew goals for Uni next year and to contirubuted some excellent things to my morning routine-setting. An overall goal for this year has been to build my personal agency.
    Very excited for this one ❤

    • @nathansummers6458
      @nathansummers6458 7 місяців тому +2

      Please can you let me know what episode one is called?

    • @petermay6496
      @petermay6496 7 місяців тому

      ​@@nathansummers6458how to understand and assess your mental health.
      I search it on the youtube : huberman with dr conti serie 1.

  • @rattansaini5423
    @rattansaini5423 3 дні тому

    Thank you Dr C & H. This has revolutionized the way I thought of relationships. May the good you spread in the world, come back to you many fold.

  • @rashmitulsyan
    @rashmitulsyan 6 місяців тому +4

    Paul Conti is like a Buddha he has so much pain in his face like dripping with Empathy and so much understanding ,,,,truly beautiful soul. Andrew is the dude bringing us these brilliant people and directing /asking the right questions. Thank you both!

  • @Spinks345
    @Spinks345 6 місяців тому +6

    Brilliant work by Dr. Conti. Something that doesn’t get recognized enough, is how great a listener Andrew is.

  • @MonicaLopez-se5me
    @MonicaLopez-se5me 7 місяців тому +41

    Paul Conti is incredibly skilled communicator, really wise, soo helpful, with such a clear mind and wealth of practical knowledge and also a really beautiful soul who is always guiding with his explanations to wholeness and love. Andrew Huberman is sooo good asking questions and leading the conversation and also always speaking really masterfully to get the wisdom of Paul Conti and share it with all of us. Is such a satisfying experience to watch 2 men speaking in such a deep and healthy way about relationships. Thank you to both of you for your incredibly valuable contribution to humanity.

  • @jehanton
    @jehanton 5 місяців тому +3

    Andrew, you are a gifted speaker. Thank you for sharing precious insights with us. I often look forward to your podcasts and your world-renowned guests.

  • @brent4464
    @brent4464 3 місяці тому +6

    So when describing narcissistic Machiavellian sociopathic people, you described my baby mama perfectly and help me understand a lot of things. And I've gone through years of court with her of making up lies about me and putting me through the ringer and the court side with her because she's the mom but I've proven them wrong of integrity alone. And I wanted to address one thing because I did leave her and I live on my own now and have my own place and still take care of my kids but sometimes you can leave but you can't get away because I'm still financially responsible for everything I still have to deal with the weight of the burden of anything that ever goes wrong it's blamed on me and the mental state that it's left me in is tough for me to deal with and I don't have any money for a therapist so I'm just trying to deal with this stuff myself in the healthiest ways I can. So I just thank you for all of your insight and knowledge

    • @bbygirl8363
      @bbygirl8363 Місяць тому

      gosh that sounds horrible. im not going to be like incels who blame u like they blame women but can u record everything she says?

  • @mariamorris954
    @mariamorris954 7 місяців тому +5

    I love these two men, so helpful to society and our inner healing. I bet Dr. Conti got her the Carburetor ❤️

  • @cgoodsonparker
    @cgoodsonparker 7 місяців тому +5

    Thank you for clarifying envy and jealousy. It sheds light on the dynamic that begins in the home and schoolyard and extends to the workplace. So many other valuable insights from you both. What an amazing gift.

  • @sandrawilson4647
    @sandrawilson4647 4 місяці тому +2

    This man is gifted and blessed in his understanding 😊 we are blessed to have both together to share and help anyone willing to choose agency and gratitude ❤🙏

  • @in_light.
    @in_light. 3 місяці тому +2

    Thank you, gentlemen. Probably one of my favourite conversations ever. I tell everybody about this channel and the series and the both of you. Dr Conti is truly one of my favourite, sage people. And I think this four-part series should be required listening for everyone.

  • @florianfloditt2881
    @florianfloditt2881 5 місяців тому

    I cannot stop listening to Dr Conti. His thoughts are gold....

  • @elspethboyd8074
    @elspethboyd8074 5 місяців тому +3

    What a FANTASTIC discussion. I can't remember ever hearing such a mature, generous and sensible conversation about relationships. I got so much out of this. Thank you both so much!

  • @NPKim
    @NPKim Місяць тому +1

    I'm on my second listen to your conversations with Dr. Conti. I have truly enjoyed his gentle voice and deeply knowledgeable insights. Thank you both for sharing your conversations and thoughts with all of us.

  • @csillatalamasz196
    @csillatalamasz196 7 місяців тому +15

    I love to follow your conversations with Dr. Conti, so much inner value in them! Thanks for sharing!

  • @JohnHoffmann-qw5wg
    @JohnHoffmann-qw5wg 7 місяців тому +12

    Monumental “Thanks Y’all” to Andrew, Paul and those behind the curtains. I’ve been suffering from depression, anxiety and ADHD for over a decade. Over-suffering from over-diagnoses in all likelihood. Your series has shown me ways I can be healthy and how in some aspects already healthy. I’ve been living with a twisted ignorance about mental health and mental illnesses. The long-format nature helps me understand Paul’s wisdom and better question my beliefs about health/pathologies/self. That the discussion kept returning to agency and gratitude showed me they are pivotal in Paul’s framework. And it let me apprehend many nuances in the value of his framework. The two visuals/downloads are very useful to me.
    Please try to find a historian who can speak to theories about mental healthiness throughout the ages and in different cultures (including behind the iron curtain). Not about mental illness, but what they thought was healthy.
    I’m fed up with pathologies. What’s the point in understating anything about what’s unhealthy if I don’t know what it means to be healthy?

  • @finchsparrowbird
    @finchsparrowbird 7 місяців тому +4

    This comments session is refreshingly populated by healthy and positive comments. I came here expecting the all-too common diatribe from people putting-down the other genders, etc. Thank you fellow viewers! 🙏 👏👏

  • @berrieds
    @berrieds 7 місяців тому +3

    I'm delighted and gratified that you are having these discussions with Dr Conti. Speaking for myself, as someone who has both personally and as a clinician dealt with psychiatric illnesses, I truly believe this is some of your best work. Looking forward to the later half of this discussion ❤

  • @95425
    @95425 5 місяців тому +3

    I have not enough words to describe how grateful I am ❤ Thank you to both of you, you’re doing the greatest work.

  • @thechannel7957
    @thechannel7957 7 місяців тому +4

    Hey Dr Huberman, I'd love to see an interview or discussion with Dr. Gabor Maté on your channel! Dr. Maté is a renowned physician and author known for his expertise in addiction, trauma, and the mind-body connection. His insights on these topics could provide valuable and enlightening content for us.

  • @sroy8817
    @sroy8817 5 місяців тому

    One of the most powerful discussions you've gifted us with, Dr Huberman.

  • @tazeenmohsin
    @tazeenmohsin 7 місяців тому +3

    The glee on Andrew's face. You could tell this would be a good podcast.

  • @irinadominy9642
    @irinadominy9642 2 місяці тому

    ...listening to Dr.P.Conti I started crying... what a beautiful person ❤️

  • @Supervale111
    @Supervale111 7 місяців тому +4

    3 life changing hours. Really thank you to both

  • @smokeywilly4364
    @smokeywilly4364 7 місяців тому +10

    This is both incredibly poetic and informative. How much I wish I could explain this to past friends and girlfriends. It’s a shame so many people are too quick to judge based on what they “see” you as.

    • @Nocebonobo
      @Nocebonobo 4 місяці тому

      I think everyone has this same feeling, but maybe wanting to show this to past girlfriends is somewhat against the point of the talk 😂

  • @YourWingmam
    @YourWingmam 7 місяців тому +13

    Love these conversations! Thank you for introducing Dr. Conti to those of us who were unfamiliar with him. I’m reading his book, Trauma. I highly recommend it for those who are ready, willing, and able to face the trauma they experienced, and anyone with a loved one who’s experienced trauma.

  • @sebc6736
    @sebc6736 7 місяців тому +2

    Thank you both for discussing the topics of relationship dynamics, and how the self and the drives within one’s self can shape said relationships. Also it’s really resonated with me that the insight that can come from psychology or psychiatry, I’ve been putting off seeing a medical professional for a while but because of your talk I’ve convinced myself that it can be a route that can really help me. I’m truly grateful for you both.

  • @alisonmcintosh937
    @alisonmcintosh937 6 місяців тому +4

    This was epically long, but absolutely worth the listen. I appreciate the shift in language around relationships. Empowering and resourcing. Thanks to you both for sharing your knowledge.

  • @tannmaydeepak5509
    @tannmaydeepak5509 6 місяців тому +1

    This series had changed my life in a more generative way.. Thank you both for your kind and generous advice 🙏🏻

  • @dianed5193
    @dianed5193 7 місяців тому +6

    This was very validating. The explantion of the narcisistic relationship and how it keeps the other stuck, was so useful to understand.
    Thank you so much for that and all the other insights this episode offered. You are doing a wonderful service for people.

  • @keeleythompson1644
    @keeleythompson1644 7 місяців тому +4

    Thank you! So grateful for your mission to help everyone have access to this science & information! We have no excuse now to not show up better as humans for each other

  • @biancagetz941
    @biancagetz941 5 місяців тому

    What a refreshing and hopeful view on mental health! Thank you Dr. Conti and Dr. Huberman. I enjoyed every second

  • @fernandooliveiralino
    @fernandooliveiralino 5 місяців тому +1

    One last to go! Terrific series. Thank you so much, Dr. Andrew Huberman and Dr. Paul Conti.

  • @snowvantures
    @snowvantures 7 місяців тому +15

    First of all I want to thank you and your team for the incredible service you bring to society.
    What Dr. Conti said around minute 37:30 about being healthy and wanting the people around us to be also healthy, really resonates with me. But that becomes a struggle when it comes to the family you have from birth, because they might have an "unhealthy" life, and it really hurts to see that.

  • @Siobhan_Bulfin
    @Siobhan_Bulfin 7 місяців тому +4

    Thank you Dr Conti and Huberman for this series. It's so helpful.

  • @geraldambrosia4227
    @geraldambrosia4227 Місяць тому

    Simply priceless and mind blowing guides. I will be listening twice, to better absorb the nuances of what is being suggested. Really incredible

  • @dustinwilcox6821
    @dustinwilcox6821 3 місяці тому

    Dr Huberman I want to thank you for your work and efforts. It has really helped me learn and grow mentally and physically healthier.

  • @flowgoestheuniverse
    @flowgoestheuniverse 7 місяців тому +8

    Thank you Dr Huberman for this series. I personally feel that it’s the most important content you’ve released to the public.

  • @jodydewittdewitt9044
    @jodydewittdewitt9044 7 місяців тому

    Pod cast like these help me be healthier and happier and have the generative drive and I’m grateful for the both of you ❤️👏🏻🙏🏻

  • @peggyford108
    @peggyford108 4 місяці тому

    Dr. Conti saved my life ❤

  • @eili8806
    @eili8806 6 місяців тому

    This podcast I now listen to again,- and have recommended to many people. So good! very very inspiring and useful. Thank you both for sharing your important knowledge in such a brilliant way.

  • @user-zw7sk9eu3k
    @user-zw7sk9eu3k 4 місяці тому

    Thank you very much for this podcast ! It helped me to understand myself or the way I communicate with people,. Dr Conti is God given gift for us for those vulnerable to oppressors. God save him

  • @martinepeters9891
    @martinepeters9891 7 місяців тому +1

    Dr. Conti is awesome together with dr. HUBERMAN.

  • @danitaoliver264
    @danitaoliver264 5 місяців тому +1

    ❤ @ 1:35:49, That Person Feeling Stuck, Learned Helplessness, If You Will. Complete Powerlessness.........Being in a Gilded Cage W/ the Key in Hand, the doors open.........but unable to Walk Through to Freedom. That's HOW THIS FEELS!!!!! TRAUMA BOND!!!!!❤

  • @theresahope9759
    @theresahope9759 7 місяців тому +10

    What a beautiful and useful topic! We have to learn how to build and maintain healthy connections in all aspects of our lives: with other people, with our environment and last but not least, with ourselves. And only then, we will trully thrive. Thank you for sharing your work, Professor! As always, such valuable information, yet free!

  • @quietandsounds
    @quietandsounds 7 місяців тому +2

    Mr. Huberman, thank you for your work. You provide valuable, very useful information. Thank you. 😊❤🙏

  • @annewhite7058
    @annewhite7058 7 місяців тому +7

    I appreciate this series. I wonder if these same ideas apply to people who may be on the autism spectrum. Would you consider doing a show on neurodivergence ? For years, parents were told not to worry about addiction with their neurodiverse kids. Now we see high-functioning neurodiverse people do have struggles with addiction - often screen addiction. How can this group of people get help. Anything on screen addiction would be so appreciated. I’m having a hard time getting help for my young adult child. Thanks for all you do!

    • @pinkifloyd7867
      @pinkifloyd7867 7 місяців тому

      Great initiative, itS like the great silent brain hacking machine and if they dont let their children why would we? 😮

  • @angiesaga8276
    @angiesaga8276 7 місяців тому

    Ty for another brilliant podcast! My respects to Dr.Huberman and Dr.Conti!!👏👏❤❤

  • @Poooooha
    @Poooooha 7 місяців тому +2

    My son turned 2 yo this weekend. During labor I was listening to Dr. Huberman’s podcast. He was delivered during Dr. Lembke’s episode. I am so grateful for all the work you do to make science available to everyone. From the bottom of my heart - thank you.

  • @tarablyfun
    @tarablyfun 7 місяців тому +15

    I especially appreciated the dialogue of relationships and transactions. Yes, there are transactions within relationships, but healthy relations are not transactional in total. I feel a relation is at an end when a person begins to measure, tit for tat. People are complex and bring so much in their own ways. We should lead with respect and gratitude for what each brings. It may not, and usually not, be equal, As Dr. Conti shared, but mutual. Thinking about it even in a basic way between what I get from the love of my dog. We both get something from being together - but I don’t think, “I feed and walk him because I get to pet him”. Ha, funny to even type.

  • @Trixie.2005
    @Trixie.2005 3 місяці тому

    Brilliant Dr Conti and Andrew. Great work Paul..

  • @Racekelly9
    @Racekelly9 4 місяці тому

    Omg, this episode gold! This man is divine🤍 Thanks Dr Conti!

  • @peoplefirstleadershipcoach
    @peoplefirstleadershipcoach 7 місяців тому

    Thank you for this knowledge on relationships. After recently ending a relationship of over 25 years, this information helps me in my personal growth which will help me in my next relationship. Aside from personal agency, I believe from my experience that one should enter a relationship from a non-selfish viewpoint. Relationships are not selfish, but truly caring for another, giving to another and taking interest in another. So many are in relationships to fulfill something they need. While self is important, relationships go way beyond self. This is the delicate balance to me. Preserving and growing self, while growing in a relationship.

  • @user-vv9ky2oo3t
    @user-vv9ky2oo3t 7 місяців тому +2

    Happy birthday dr. Huberman! 🎉 Your podcasts are fantastic! Thank you so much!

  • @stevegaspar
    @stevegaspar Місяць тому +10

    after this weeks allegations this episode and the one with Dr. Buss are more eye opening

    • @kriswittyk
      @kriswittyk Місяць тому

      so true... I hadn't seen this episode before but its clear that Dr. Conti is incredibly well-versed and well-spoken. He gave very good answers to Andy's questions even though those questions have very little to do with what the good dr. was saying, and are clearly based in insecurities. Imagine how this conversation could have gone if Dr. Huberman was not preoccupied with his own internal and relationship struggles. :(

  • @danielleyamasaki6771
    @danielleyamasaki6771 7 місяців тому +1

    So grateful that you shared this knowledge! I feel way more confident in gaining better awareness of how I struggled in the past and how I can do better navigating relationships moving forward!

  • @jeancardoza4442
    @jeancardoza4442 7 місяців тому

    Love this series. Learning so much. Thank you! More and we can heal the world.

  • @electricjellyfish375
    @electricjellyfish375 6 місяців тому

    It is Amazing and totally wonderful that this kind of information is presented to the public for free.

  • @shirleykilbride4555
    @shirleykilbride4555 5 місяців тому

    Thank u Andrew and Dr Paul ..u are the.models of ultimate givers helping fix society' ailes ... ❤

  • @Squirrel_101
    @Squirrel_101 7 місяців тому +2

    Thank you for sharing. I have BPD and as such relationships for me are difficult. There's a lot I can take away from this conversation

  • @salvajebienestar
    @salvajebienestar 6 місяців тому

    Thanks to you I just realize and put a name of relationship success: generative drive. the more I think of it the more sense it does. A “simple thing” I I ve never thought like that before.
    Thanks so much for being so revealing.

  • @loyalty8803
    @loyalty8803 7 місяців тому +1

    Yess sir love hearing these for a better understanding

  • @decemberbreidel
    @decemberbreidel 2 місяці тому

    Everything I have seen you do is so valuable to me. Thank you.

  • @TimCrain-ke5vt
    @TimCrain-ke5vt 7 місяців тому +1

    Thanks! Andrew, it would be difficult at best to articulate the profound positive impact your four-part series with Dr. Conti has had on me, so I won’t try. I have done a life, reboot, body mind and spirit, and by divine intervention I stumbled across the series on your podcast. I recommended it to a dozen of my friends and family members. For the first time in my adult life, I have a clear vision and a better understanding of why I’ve done some of the things I’ve done, and how to make positive changes that will impact my life and the lives of everyone in my bubble moving forward. Cheers and keep on keep’n on!
    TC

  • @user-nv6lk6jb6f
    @user-nv6lk6jb6f 7 місяців тому

    Thank you Andrew Huberman and Dr. Conti! These discussions are so beautiful and helpful, informative and healing. Please keep going. Love and shalom to you both. ❤️📣🎯🚀

  • @katerino4kaaaa373
    @katerino4kaaaa373 6 місяців тому

    Really love this episode. Dr. Paul puts into simple words what Erich Fromm described

  • @upavida
    @upavida 7 місяців тому

    This is a wonderful episode! Everyone should listen/watch. ❤

  • @user-nx2ht6nh2o
    @user-nx2ht6nh2o 7 місяців тому

    Super interesting! I wish you could make more episodes with Dr Paul Conti, he is a jewel 💎

  • @MatchmakingServices
    @MatchmakingServices 6 місяців тому

    Thank you ,Andrew, for setting up such wonderful shows: which are very informative and useful

  • @shalakasarpotdar3996
    @shalakasarpotdar3996 5 місяців тому +1

    It was such an interesting series that it was impossible to not go back and hear it again, especially parts that seem most relevant to me. I think it would be a worthwhile project to put it all in a book.

  • @VonW0lf3N5t31N
    @VonW0lf3N5t31N 4 місяці тому +1

    Hey Andrew! Thanks for this collaboration and information. Have an awesome day!

  • @healthycomments
    @healthycomments 6 місяців тому +1

    Dude, this is a smart m*fer! All things aside though, this content really changed my life recently and it was only through seeing the benefits of generative drive that I saw where happiness is hidden; tucked away in plain sight for us all whenever we find and stay with the courage it takes within for it to show up in our everyday lives.
    People will look and feel an allure and desire to be around you. You have that "thing."

  • @edmundobaca3498
    @edmundobaca3498 6 місяців тому

    Amazing Dr.Paul Conti.

  • @AP-ri5ph
    @AP-ri5ph 7 місяців тому +6

    Finished my 1st round of 3 hrs, re-listening it again, love it, love it, love it - THANK U Dr Huberman & Dr Conti 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

  • @johnblake4523
    @johnblake4523 7 місяців тому

    More tremendous insights. Thank you both.

  • @marshad.9149
    @marshad.9149 Місяць тому

    Really eye opening exchange of information. I’d like to add, Dr Huberman, that in my experience working for tips that the successful are by far the least generous. Poverty level as a whole were much better tippers. In my experience, and those of my contemporaries who have shared experiences with me. This speaks to me of an innate sense of fairness and generosity in the less than successful. There are always exceptions of course. I hope sir, that you are one such exception. Thank you for addressing this subject.

  • @AllinterneyThingsandstufd
    @AllinterneyThingsandstufd 7 місяців тому

    Very good point when dr. Conti told Dr. Huberman about a relationship with abuse is not an extreme or special case.

  • @shawnaasendorf6908
    @shawnaasendorf6908 7 місяців тому

    Fabulous, so much gratitude 🙏🏽

  • @xanynax
    @xanynax 5 місяців тому

    This is a new way of looking at relationships that is useful and enlightening. Thank you for adding new knowledge for me to integrate.

  • @carolinao9918
    @carolinao9918 5 місяців тому

    Thank you for your podcasts. So helpful!👏👏👏

  • @shadanhameed6201
    @shadanhameed6201 7 місяців тому

    I thank you from my heart for sharing this fascinating discussion ❤

  • @dianegilbank5095
    @dianegilbank5095 7 місяців тому +1

    What a amazing series! This one has so much to dissect and I am an hour in! Especially the piece about the trauma bond actually having a positive effect of managed to engender a more cohesive relationship! Also the sexual appetite of a 2 and an 8 so well explained about how it is possible to come together ! The sadness is that each is so entrenched in their belief that coming together just doesn’t happen! I wish I had had that knowledge when in a relationship! It might have started a conversation which could have resolved a chasm that was never breached sadly!!! Each in defence of their own position!! I look forward to listening to the rest of the talk on my next early morning walk, thank you to you both x

  • @paulx7620
    @paulx7620 7 місяців тому +19

    Great, my father said to have "an attitude of gratitude".
    And that's what I credit so much of my happiness too!
    Thanks to everyone involved 👍

  • @Nich_Rogers
    @Nich_Rogers 6 місяців тому

    I absolutely loved these four sessions. As someone who has worked in the AOD and MH field most of my life the simply conceptual structure is invaluable to share with those who are on the early help seeking journey, but not yet ready to commit. Would love you to have Paul back in integrate discussion about 'meaning' in the context of the generative drive, I feel it would add more depth the this dimension and was missing in the conversation. I'm sure Paul has thought about it through this lens, but would love to hear him explain.

  • @TrishCanyon8
    @TrishCanyon8 7 місяців тому

    I didn't think this lecture would be so good but ❤ it has really helped me. This channel continues to help me grow. ❤❤❤

  • @robertgutierrez8403
    @robertgutierrez8403 7 місяців тому

    Invaluable understanding of the dynamics of relationships,With the understanding that it all starts with the self

  • @GAMEOVER-iz1lm
    @GAMEOVER-iz1lm 6 місяців тому +2

    Masterpiece

  • @cherylnathanodette
    @cherylnathanodette 5 місяців тому

    Always great guests and lots of brilliant content, always grateful.