Fake Facts that Everyone Thinks Are True PART II

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  • Опубліковано 7 лют 2025
  • Get Surfshark VPN at Surfshark.deal... and enter promo code BLAZE for 85% off and 3 extra months for free!
    BECOME A LEGEND (with ease) by joining my Legendary Legends Newsletter: t.co/jedug2vS4...
    This video is #sponsored by Surfshark.
    Simon's Social Media:
    Twitter: / simonwhistler
    Instagram: / simonwhistler
    Simon's Other Channels:
    TodayIFoundOut: / todayifoundout
    TopTenz: / toptenznet
    Biographics: / @biographics
    Visual Politik: / @visualpolitiken
    Highlight History: / @highlighthistory
    Geographics: / @geographicstravel

КОМЕНТАРІ • 2,4 тис.

  • @brainblaze6526
    @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +278

    Get Surfshark VPN at Surfshark.deals/blaze and enter promo code BLAZE for 85% off and 3 extra months for free!
    OR ETA WILL HACK YOUR SHIT SO HARD.

    • @OtakuUnitedStudio
      @OtakuUnitedStudio 4 роки тому +11

      Typo in the title, allegedly.

    • @vexedemperor5588
      @vexedemperor5588 4 роки тому +2

      Do you mean think

    • @davidweikle9538
      @davidweikle9538 4 роки тому +2

      *Fake Facts That Everyone Things Are True PART II*

    • @abdulmutawakkil2427
      @abdulmutawakkil2427 4 роки тому +5

      You finally got sponsored after all those jokes looking for a sponsor allegedly

    • @StfuFFS
      @StfuFFS 4 роки тому +2

      I saw The Exorcist when I was 3 years old in a drive in. My mom thought I was sleeping in the backseat... i wasn't.
      I still regret not having been asleep.

  • @Tiberon098
    @Tiberon098 4 роки тому +352

    Simon: “This script seems a bit thin Danny, this will be a short video.”
    Also Simon: Goes on many several minute long tangents.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +73

      I've got to bulk it out with filler for the watch time.

    • @Markle2k
      @Markle2k 4 роки тому +7

      @@brainblaze6526 Hey, if you can hold the watch time, “legit” operations might be willing to give you a go.

    • @karlsantos
      @karlsantos 4 роки тому +13

      @@brainblaze6526 you are the bread crumbles to Danny's grounded meat of undetermined origin.

    • @Tiberon098
      @Tiberon098 4 роки тому +6

      Business Blaze not complaining one bit, its great content that is worth every second.

    • @IndianaDipper194
      @IndianaDipper194 4 роки тому +1

      Truth!

  • @LtColShingSides
    @LtColShingSides 4 роки тому +142

    ETA, if you steal my identity just remember you're stuck with it and there are no returns.

    • @marthahawkinson-michau9611
      @marthahawkinson-michau9611 4 роки тому +7

      Can someone please steal my student loans??? I’d love to get rid of them that fast...

    • @Drizzit57
      @Drizzit57 4 роки тому +6

      Also have fun with my car payments!

    • @omgitsclinton
      @omgitsclinton 4 роки тому +5

      And the morgage!

    • @robinderoos1166
      @robinderoos1166 4 роки тому

      @@marthahawkinson-michau9611 get a job? I paid off my loan after my third paycheck

    • @davidtee5367
      @davidtee5367 4 роки тому +2

      @@robinderoos1166 Maybe she got a doctorate instead of an associates?

  • @kindoflame
    @kindoflame 4 роки тому +309

    What comments say: "You don't care anymore."
    What comments mean: "You should do more cocaine before filming."

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +66

      Legit.

    • @werroloco3112
      @werroloco3112 4 роки тому +8

      This channel and Ben Shapiro are the only UA-cam videos I can watch when geeked. Everything else seems too slow and pisses me off lol

    • @jackbridge5780
      @jackbridge5780 4 роки тому +5

      someone doesnt like simone having a personality :'(
      if you read till the end youd of got to know that i know his names simon ;)

    • @Sutekhamon
      @Sutekhamon 4 роки тому

      This

  • @Zukashi07
    @Zukashi07 4 роки тому +114

    ‘Tallest, thinnest man ever’, bald and wears a blazer. Confirmed Simon is Slender Man.

    • @alexandergausJTP
      @alexandergausJTP 4 роки тому +6

      Great, now,that I imagined it, I can't unsee it 😖🤪

  • @gkid64
    @gkid64 4 роки тому +64

    Simon: doesn't like old movies, books and shows
    Also Simon: likes Phil Collins

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +18

      I like music more than those other things.

    • @gkid64
      @gkid64 4 роки тому +7

      @@brainblaze6526 still doesn't mean that Phil Collins is good

    • @DubhghlasMacDubhghlas
      @DubhghlasMacDubhghlas 4 роки тому +2

      @@gkid64 by the movies he hasn't watch we can tell he has poor taste. ;p

    • @eddunay7518
      @eddunay7518 4 роки тому +2

      British Patrick Bateman confirmed.

    • @MortanAMrk
      @MortanAMrk 3 роки тому +6

      Who doesnt like Phil Collins?

  • @jockeberg8353
    @jockeberg8353 4 роки тому +827

    This is your best channel by far since we get more of your personality here

    • @nellom.8771
      @nellom.8771 4 роки тому +135

      Personality = mass amounts of cocaine. Allegedly.

    • @Renfa_Arviette
      @Renfa_Arviette 4 роки тому +21

      ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so thats why theres no difference.

    • @McFlyOrPie
      @McFlyOrPie 4 роки тому +33

      Yeah, since this channel started, I rarely watch any of his others. 😄

    • @NicknackLP
      @NicknackLP 4 роки тому +19

      @@nellom.8771 Please dont sue this guy Simon.

    • @justinw2451
      @justinw2451 4 роки тому +15

      It's strange I actually don't really like his other channels, but this one with Simon being himself is actually really good

  • @TiberiusWallace
    @TiberiusWallace 4 роки тому +215

    Plot twist, his router isn't broken but his bandwidth is being used by a sunglasses wearing teen to hack the mainframe.

    • @danieledwards3376
      @danieledwards3376 4 роки тому +1

      The cool kids call it a Gibson, not a mainframe :)

    • @IndianaDipper194
      @IndianaDipper194 4 роки тому +2

      Nah its actually just eta using the bandwidth for hacking the mainframe. He framed the sunglasses wearing teen

    • @LizRealGirlBeauty
      @LizRealGirlBeauty 4 роки тому +4

      Or Danny using it all trying to send out messages for rescue. It's not happening Danny!

    • @Digitalhunny
      @Digitalhunny 4 роки тому +1

      Yeah, named Sam! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +7

      I gotta get my router Surfshark.

  • @kolcs
    @kolcs 4 роки тому +40

    Imagine someone stumbling on one of the BB first videos, like the AOL one and thinking "Oh, what an informative yet also amusing channel. And the host is so charming and proper. I am very kuch interested in learning more about business. Let me watch the latest video" and within seconds they see Simon harassing a Wilsonized heater. What must they be thinking?

  • @burtbackattack
    @burtbackattack 4 роки тому +6

    "If it's a goblin it can fuck off"
    It's lines like that make this channel so good.

  • @anamkarajoy
    @anamkarajoy 3 роки тому +1

    I babysat my ex-husband's three-year-old cousin, and she begged and begged to watch her favorite movie--"Clown Movie"... I told her that was fine, and to go find it and put it in the DVD player, so she did.
    *It was the original "IT".* And this cherubic-looking tot squealed, "Watch, Kara! Watch! He's gonna bite his arm off!!!" and broke into peals of maniacal laughter, while the child on the screen screamed in agony.
    It was a decade ago, and I'm still shook.

  • @bateman2112
    @bateman2112 4 роки тому +61

    What if I want ETA to steal my identity. He's already stole my heart.

    • @SRW_
      @SRW_ 4 роки тому +2

      Yes!

  • @gabrielbarraza5886
    @gabrielbarraza5886 4 роки тому +46

    Would love a blaze about the most expensive movies. Just so Simon would no nothing 😂

  • @bateman2112
    @bateman2112 4 роки тому +97

    "...pissing about in chimneys..." Worst. Santa. Ever.

    • @bateman2112
      @bateman2112 4 роки тому

      This arouses me

    • @renren4m802
      @renren4m802 4 роки тому +1

      Worst Christmas present ever

    • @anyawillowfan
      @anyawillowfan 4 роки тому +2

      In the UK 'pissing about' means 'messing around'.

    • @Markle2k
      @Markle2k 4 роки тому

      @@anyawillowfan The origin is the same. You are doing nothing. You’re probably also causing harm.

    • @anyawillowfan
      @anyawillowfan 4 роки тому

      @@Markle2k How am I causing harm?

  • @doroheil5953
    @doroheil5953 4 роки тому +10

    Just imagine when Simon's daughter writes a tell all memoir about her dad ...

  • @danielt1949
    @danielt1949 4 роки тому +22

    I just want one episode where Danny gives Simon a whole 5 minuet conversation with ETA, then Sam doesn't bother adding in ETA's voice, and Simon just ends up looking insane

    • @kaldogorath
      @kaldogorath Рік тому

      Hello person from the past, I don't know what ETA is, would you mind helping me out? :)

    • @benjaminepstein5856
      @benjaminepstein5856 Рік тому +1

      @@kaldogorath his space heater that he got during COVID, because his boiler broke and no one would/could send a repairman because of the plague. ETA eventually took on a personality of his own and was one of my favorite parts of early BB.

  • @geistlos333
    @geistlos333 4 роки тому +151

    There's a video idea - "Questionable Facts" where Danny can put in both real but weird facts and untruths that people frequently believe and Simon could try and guess which were which.

    • @mandymaeK1
      @mandymaeK1 4 роки тому +5

      I actually love this.

    • @austinwilliams7919
      @austinwilliams7919 3 роки тому +4

      But gotta be live 👉👉🤙

    • @peterfichera2027
      @peterfichera2027 2 роки тому +4

      @@austinwilliams7919 Well,
      Dead would probably be too gross...

    • @Charley.Farley
      @Charley.Farley 2 роки тому +3

      Only just watching this (hence commenting on this now, sorry!) 😳 but I LOVE this idea.
      Just watching Simon chase his own tail, throwing things around for three hours 😂

    • @GimmeJimmy23
      @GimmeJimmy23 2 роки тому +3

      Simon likes games like this. Sounds like a winner!

  • @aprilkurtz1589
    @aprilkurtz1589 4 роки тому +23

    Most excellent use of the subtle squeaker fart I've ever heard, Sam! Poor Simon. Eta: I was really sad this A.M., and you guys made me laugh like a freaking hyena. Literally. Thanks so much.

  • @squishtheprodigalson9298
    @squishtheprodigalson9298 4 роки тому +51

    Call me an 8 year old, but I laugh like a kid every time Simon squats/bends over and Sam has added in a fart sound. 😂😂😂

    • @ComXDude
      @ComXDude 4 роки тому +1

      You're an 8 year old. Are you happy now?!

    • @nunyobidniz
      @nunyobidniz 4 роки тому +1

      I always thought that was Simon adding the sound FX

    • @Digitalhunny
      @Digitalhunny 4 роки тому +1

      Sam is a legend.... _alegendly._ What else is new? 😆😆

    • @pandapotato5121
      @pandapotato5121 4 роки тому

      I hate that I laugh at them

    • @creativeknotting
      @creativeknotting 4 роки тому

      I wasn't the only one who heard it! i giggled like an 8 year old too lol

  • @ecmorgan69
    @ecmorgan69 4 роки тому +20

    "Cocaine Zero"
    I can only imagine how popular that product would be.

  • @Rathulf
    @Rathulf 4 роки тому +7

    I really like how this channel evolved more to show a candid Simon, along with it being a low-key rant channel that is still entertainjng and informative

  • @moikkis65
    @moikkis65 4 роки тому +13

    Huge props to surfshark for sponsoring this weird ass channel we all love for some reason :D

  • @Evilgrebo
    @Evilgrebo 4 роки тому +72

    So is this channel Simon's slow decent into madness with a space heater?

    • @7-ten
      @7-ten 4 роки тому +11

      Nope. It's just a cocaine fueled a good time!
      Allegedly.^^

    • @kindoflame
      @kindoflame 4 роки тому +12

      I wouldn't exactly call it slow.

    • @mikebutler7237
      @mikebutler7237 4 роки тому +8

      2001 a Space Heater epic movie highly recommend

    • @drbosommd
      @drbosommd 4 роки тому +4

      Evilgrebo - you must be new here.

    • @C.L.Hinton
      @C.L.Hinton 4 роки тому +3

      And also a writer chained to a radiator in the basement!

  • @Aaron-ym4bf
    @Aaron-ym4bf 4 роки тому +82

    I would’ve thought with a channel name like “business blaze” it would have been the least liked of the channels by me. FALSE. It is the finest of Simon Whistler channels. And also Danny, the Meme Guy, The Accountant, and ETA.

    • @jackbridge5780
      @jackbridge5780 4 роки тому +8

      same here, i avoided the channel for a while till i ran out of Simon porn

    • @Phoenix_emperor76
      @Phoenix_emperor76 4 роки тому

      Hold up this went to 11 real fast

    • @marynolan1631
      @marynolan1631 3 роки тому +1

      SAME!!

    • @emilyc8958
      @emilyc8958 3 роки тому

      Same. I think this was part of the reason for the name change. Business sounds boring and serious.

  • @kietsuhime
    @kietsuhime 4 роки тому +7

    I love how Simon is calm and collected for the most part on the Top Tenz and the Today I Learned UA-cam channels, but on Business Blaze, he's totally belligerent. Lol!

  • @AnemoneSilvermyst
    @AnemoneSilvermyst Рік тому +3

    I love Simon's ad reads, they're pretty creative!

  • @4077Disc
    @4077Disc 4 роки тому +34

    Dear EtA,
    I think you’re great
    Please remember this when you overthrow Simon and take over the Empire.
    Have a great day!

  • @johannesspringinsfeld6381
    @johannesspringinsfeld6381 4 роки тому +72

    Can we get a Blaze on the "alleged" 2 billion fraud at wirecard? I think it's a story that both danny and simon would quite enjoy

    • @harrypadarri6349
      @harrypadarri6349 4 роки тому +3

      Yeah, yesterday I saw a wanted poster with a foto of the ceo(or whatever) at an underground station.
      Hot topic! (Allegedly)

    • @ZeusTheIrritable
      @ZeusTheIrritable 4 роки тому +1

      Good idea.

    • @mcstotti8691
      @mcstotti8691 4 роки тому +2

      It is so recent that half the video would need to be spent saying allegedly... And we are all down for that.

    • @WmG2004
      @WmG2004 4 роки тому +2

      @@harrypadarri6349
      * photo
      Don't want you making that mistake when it really matters.

    • @dmhendricks
      @dmhendricks 4 роки тому +1

      Agree, that would be a good one. There are many businesses to Blaze.. Theranos, WeWork, or for something closer to home, the RBS (Royal Bank of Scotland for we Americans) shenanigans during the 2008 financial crisis. That said, Wirecard story would be my first choice because I've seen less coverage (almost none, save for UA-cam) of it over here.

  • @papa_xan
    @papa_xan 4 роки тому +38

    Fake fact: TopTenz always has ten facts in every video.

  • @Kevindaly382
    @Kevindaly382 11 місяців тому +2

    We would say the pledge of allegiance in the morning not sing the national anthem Simon! Absolute Bell.

  • @MinistryOfMagic_DoM
    @MinistryOfMagic_DoM 4 роки тому +17

    I finally purched the merch. You got me with the "Ask me about my pyramid scheme" so I got it as a mug. Good news: it is expected to arrive around the time I start my new job so it'll make a great desk ornament for meeting my new colleagues.

  • @jonathanwalls6760
    @jonathanwalls6760 4 роки тому +149

    Does it ever occur to anyone that Simon could actually just fart on camera and we would all just assume it was Sam?

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +57

      It has definitely occurred to me. I think it has actually happened one time.

    • @jonathanwalls6760
      @jonathanwalls6760 4 роки тому +35

      @@brainblaze6526 well now I know what my years of training in acoustic analysis were for

    • @HismumYT
      @HismumYT 4 роки тому +8

      Jonathan Walls my man, you know what has to be done. In your heart of hearts, you know what you have to do. The time has come

    • @katniptime4me
      @katniptime4me 4 роки тому +9

      Just blame ETA.

    • @comettamer
      @comettamer 4 роки тому +3

      I never assumed it was Sam. I just figured he was singing Phil Collins loudly to attempt covering it. No luck tho.

  • @donnybrookinhooligan1088
    @donnybrookinhooligan1088 4 роки тому +59

    Simon: hands wife giant popsicle stick
    Simons Wife: whats this for?
    Simon: when the time comes you will know

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke 4 роки тому +39

    Simon: I want to be frozen when I die!
    Mrs. Whistler: Well, a chest freezer's cheaper than a funeral!!!
    Anna: Daddy! Chill!!!
    :P

  • @RustedSteele
    @RustedSteele 4 роки тому +18

    "Well it's not my truth, is it?"
    Me: *Subscribes harder.*

  • @karlholtz5287
    @karlholtz5287 2 роки тому +1

    I've only ever been to one open casket funeral, and it was for my grandfather. Now my grandfather had lost an eye as a young child and as a result, had a glass eye for most of his life. He never closed the eyelids over his glass eye, even when sleeping. They closed both eyes for his funeral, and it was very moving. I'd never seen him look so at peace. I have no desire to go to another open casket funeral, as I do not know anyone else that never closes both eyes, and it would not be as moving.

  • @Zyo117
    @Zyo117 4 роки тому +23

    "They're repairing my dendrites!"
    Welcome to Business Blaze.

  • @rustyshacklferd1829
    @rustyshacklferd1829 4 роки тому +13

    ETA handling all the Ad spots is genius!!! I never thought I'd say this but . . . Good Job Simon.
    Free Charles!

  • @voidstar.studio
    @voidstar.studio 4 роки тому +18

    the fart noises get me every single time. I'm convinced I'm still a 12 year old. don't ever stop with those, Sam

  • @FloralAndFire
    @FloralAndFire 4 роки тому +7

    Watching Simon slowly go insane because he's become a father is now my new favorite thing.

  • @thekittykarate
    @thekittykarate 4 роки тому +15

    Bonus Fact: Montgomery Ward (now defunct US department store) invented Rudolph to boost sales. So, even if Santa is not a corporate sellout, your life is still a lie. Merry Christmas

    • @MandieKearns-Moore
      @MandieKearns-Moore 9 місяців тому

      I'm very specifically never had Santa in my home never any of those things because my kids not only have to know that the presidents came from me but they had to know that everything they got was something that was hard for me to get for them not to some fancy little elf made it in some mystical snowy room. I told them we gave each other gifts and the name of Jesus as if we're giving gifts for him for his birthday for Easter we went ahead and did baskets and all that stuff but they knew that there was no bunny it was just something silly everybody did and I was free candy for them and we went to church on Easter and when they would lose a tooth my ex-husband and I would bid on their teeth and whoever got the best that we have to turn in a sealed bid and whoever won got the tooth

  • @hardotyler6415
    @hardotyler6415 4 роки тому +55

    After binging Business Blaze, I have trouble watching a serious Simon on Today I Found Out

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +16

      I go back and watch some of the old ones, and you can almost see him all constipated trying to keep the real Simon under control. Like he is holding in ticks.

    • @marthahawkinson-michau9611
      @marthahawkinson-michau9611 4 роки тому +8

      After Blazing on Business Blaze, Simon has a hard time keeping the real Simon Whistler locked inside longe enough to make a serious video....

    • @Tbraaaa
      @Tbraaaa 4 роки тому +4

      There is definitely an aspect to the diminishing utils of enjoyment when we get the “whole” Simon when he’s just “Blazin’”...although the content is excellent, and he has seemed to spill some of the Blaze-mentality over to some of the more recent videos on other channels...Praize the Blaze!!

    • @MrEnjoivolcom1
      @MrEnjoivolcom1 10 місяців тому

      @@Tbraaaa I followed the serving half of this fairly easily, as it made sense, lol. But attempting to read and *AND* understand the first half…I read through at least 6x and have yet to have any sense of meaning. Perhaps a word or two got deleted?

  • @dethmin173
    @dethmin173 4 роки тому +99

    The title is misspelt because Simon forgot to enable Surfshark and ETA decided to troll him epicly.

  • @bs4228
    @bs4228 4 роки тому +21

    "Daddy chill" gets me every time

    • @Snake-yx1dq
      @Snake-yx1dq 4 роки тому +1

      I looked up that clip to show all my coworkers so they would get it when I quoted it all day.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +2

      Its the finest of memes.

    • @t.y.4198
      @t.y.4198 4 роки тому

      Unless they made you use it as a safe word.. but they still get you every time.

  • @adamhuckfeldt2895
    @adamhuckfeldt2895 4 роки тому +2

    Absolute legends Simon & Danny. ETA, If you want to steal my identity please steal my debts. I like the meme of Santa promoting cocaine zero but he clearly doesn't use it as he's still fat. Use the products you endorse Santa!!!

  • @sirnird9982
    @sirnird9982 4 роки тому +4

    "Do you use the internet, you obviously do!" No Simon, my family prints frame by frame of each video and adds subtitles so I can watch via flip book and read what you are saying. I love it and it's how I "internet".

  • @JC-zj2is
    @JC-zj2is 4 роки тому +36

    “Simon’s plan to become rich”
    Step 1. Slowly introduce *business blaze mannerisms into all his UA-cam channels*
    Step 2. *Simons audience tunes in, and becomes addicted to all his UA-cam channels*
    Step 3. *uses the profits to buy cocaine*
    Step 4. *becomes a European Druglord and retires from UA-cam*

    • @nellom.8771
      @nellom.8771 4 роки тому

      With that beard, I'd believe it.

    • @glennjamessephton7593
      @glennjamessephton7593 4 роки тому +4

      Allegedly

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +3

      He could not live without the attention! I picture him more doing the slow decent to madness that long term you tuber's like Shane Dawson ALLEGEDLY have gone down. Edit... while also being a drug lord, of course.

    • @LRGDuran
      @LRGDuran 4 роки тому +1

      His plan stops at step 3, period.

    • @vfreeman3188
      @vfreeman3188 4 роки тому

      Shhhh

  • @nickleo7586
    @nickleo7586 4 роки тому +11

    I'm American and, while growing up, I found it very odd that we used to state the pledge of allegiance every single day. I remember wondering "who's questioning grade schoolers' allegiance?" lmao

    • @remlatzargonix1329
      @remlatzargonix1329 4 роки тому +2

      Nickle El Bago ...also, what an authoritarian state; that makes anyone, let alone kids, pledge their allegiance?
      I cant imagine every day having to say, essentially, "oh flaggy poo, I love you...."....

    • @nickleo7586
      @nickleo7586 4 роки тому +2

      @@remlatzargonix1329 it was weird af, honestly. I remember just learning the words because the concept of questioning my, and other *children's* allegiance was so strange. As far as I know they don't do that anymore.

    • @PeterJohnson1289
      @PeterJohnson1289 4 роки тому +1

      Nickle El Bago yeah, they still do that...

    • @nickleo7586
      @nickleo7586 4 роки тому +1

      @@PeterJohnson1289 weird. It's been a while since I've been in school, but it wasnt a thing by middle school and in high school it was a distant memory, replaced in both stages of school by the morning announcements. I could be mistaken, I do have a mere human brain that is, in fact, fallable lol

    • @ComXDude
      @ComXDude 4 роки тому +1

      @@nickleo7586 Can confirm, we still do it almost every day. And there's still quite a few people who still recite it with cultlike obedience.

  • @jeremyowen1
    @jeremyowen1 4 роки тому +44

    The comments say there's a spelling mistake. Allegedly.

  • @Mattteus
    @Mattteus 4 роки тому +15

    The “she puts the Fe in Female” meme was pretty good.

  • @micheal49
    @micheal49 4 роки тому +3

    "Start your own channel" ... and I stood up and applauded.

  • @gifttanz
    @gifttanz 4 роки тому +16

    Imagining the person at SurfShark that approved this ad read. XD Legend.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +9

      Oh man, it really does astound me, I push it more and more each time. Love it.

    • @benejeneb
      @benejeneb 4 роки тому +2

      Dude-bro-friendista Simon, how do you not wind up commenting on the wrong video with the wrong channel?! You must have to SCROLL through your youtube channels!
      I mean hats off to you for the accomplishment *applause*
      ...so far O.O

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +3

      It is probably Sam or Danny working a side job... OR the old writer for Blaze, who seemed to quietly vanish without a word about him.

    • @MrEnjoivolcom1
      @MrEnjoivolcom1 10 місяців тому

      @@benejeneb And I highly assumed he/they reply to said comments while within the very video itself, as opposed to combing through each of the comments in the notifications section.

  • @stefanbraem
    @stefanbraem 4 роки тому +90

    “Fake Facts that Everyone Things are true”

    • @AcornElectron
      @AcornElectron 4 роки тому +12

      Stefan Braem Well I thing it’s true. And I have and enclompedian to prove it.

    • @Bismarcus
      @Bismarcus 4 роки тому +9

      Sometimes I thing that thinging is overrated. But now I thing that some thoungt should have been put in this title.

    • @ShannonBox85
      @ShannonBox85 4 роки тому +1

      @@Bismarcus i hate you

    • @aenorist2431
      @aenorist2431 4 роки тому +2

      I too thing this typo is extremely funny.

    • @AcornElectron
      @AcornElectron 4 роки тому +2

      Bismarcus I thing not, I thing it’s worked perfectly for the algolrhythm. More comments equals increase visibility on YouTurb?

  • @Myaora
    @Myaora 4 роки тому +102

    I want to comment on "everyone things" but I am afraid it's a troll Simon will explain later in the video. So, I wrote this comment in such a way as to give myself a safe out.

    • @Myaora
      @Myaora 4 роки тому +8

      @Undead Eskimo Definitely not the first time I've exposed myself.

    • @brantleyhester6641
      @brantleyhester6641 4 роки тому +4

      I thing y'all are just fine

    • @aaronberta3958
      @aaronberta3958 4 роки тому +6

      He changed it to thinks... We must not let him forget his mistake 😂😂😂 😂

    • @Myaora
      @Myaora 4 роки тому +4

      @@aaronberta3958 Don't worry. ETA will remind him every 15 minutes.

    • @MinistryOfMagic_DoM
      @MinistryOfMagic_DoM 4 роки тому +1

      @@Myaora heyo!

  • @unice5656
    @unice5656 4 роки тому +8

    "Death is the worst possible outcome"
    I'm afraid you've just taunted life to prove you wrong.

  • @shelceygusek427
    @shelceygusek427 4 роки тому +9

    What Simon says: Buy my sponsor so I can buy more booze.
    What Simon means: more awesome fans should send me scotch... And money... for coc-
    ...other fine things...

  • @joshcheatham9424
    @joshcheatham9424 4 роки тому +16

    You need to do a video on the "accomplishments" of the Kim's you got 3 generations of people claiming ridiculous shit. Finding unicorns and creating the hamburger.

    • @nunyobidniz
      @nunyobidniz 4 роки тому +1

      That sounds like a cool Blaze

    • @Zepplin76
      @Zepplin76 4 роки тому +1

      Kim Kardashian Jung Un?

  • @mattstorie4874
    @mattstorie4874 4 роки тому +81

    Simon, you ask all the time “why do people even watch this channel?” but have you ever considered that beyond the excellent memes & script, ETA, and OG business blaze jokes that people like this content because of who you are? That perhaps you’re a wonderful person and just being yourself is something that people think is worth the time to watch? I know from the podcast and his channel how much you work, so maybe you don’t give yourself all the self-love you should but remember people like you just for being you.

    • @danielpratt1970
      @danielpratt1970 4 роки тому +21

      Pretty sure it's the fart jokes.

    • @ComXDude
      @ComXDude 4 роки тому +12

      @@danielpratt1970 *_Allegendly_*

    • @danielpratt1970
      @danielpratt1970 4 роки тому +5

      @@ComXDude ALLEGEDLY. Please don't sue me XD.

    • @ComXDude
      @ComXDude 4 роки тому +3

      @@danielpratt1970 Because you act nicely, I will call back my elite team of lawyers.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +17

      I guess. I just always thought I was a bit of a knob.

  • @Nipplator99999999999
    @Nipplator99999999999 4 роки тому +6

    We need to thank whomever gave Simon all his bright red toys he gets to play with.

  • @cpt8722
    @cpt8722 2 роки тому +1

    I’d definitely get drunk with you Simon!!!…now would you want to get drunk with me, we will never know! Lol either way much love mate…keep doing your thing!

  • @DanDroidx
    @DanDroidx 4 роки тому +14

    "I'd be the tallest, thinnest guy ever!"
    It's all the cocaine...

  • @lynnhoffmann247
    @lynnhoffmann247 4 роки тому +29

    LOL We didn’t sing our National Anthem at school everyday, we said The Pledge of Allegiance....back in the day...before people got weird about it & made us stop.

    • @andreahughes5042
      @andreahughes5042 4 роки тому +13

      Lol, it got weird when Eisenhower added words "under god" in 1954.

    • @claytonmatthew6073
      @claytonmatthew6073 4 роки тому +5

      They're still doing it

    • @ClikcerProductions
      @ClikcerProductions 4 роки тому +14

      Yeah theres nothing weird and brain washy about forcing children to constantly recite something drenched in nationalism to a scary extent, why would anyone get weird about it?

    • @ianpage2509
      @ianpage2509 4 роки тому +4

      Clikcer Productions yea it was almost as if they wanted us to be loyal to our nation and not our leaders.

    • @ClikcerProductions
      @ClikcerProductions 4 роки тому +4

      @@ianpage2509 Found the nationalist

  • @ayjay579
    @ayjay579 4 роки тому +488

    A fake fact that Europeans think is true: Americans singing the national anthem every day at school.

    • @machematix
      @machematix 4 роки тому +96

      Only at every sporting event, and the pledge of allegiance every day at school, right? Super wierd. Y'all the only country that does that sort of thing since the jingoistic days pre-WWI

    • @Zamtrios245
      @Zamtrios245 4 роки тому +43

      Yeah, but we have to say the pledge of allegiance

    • @PalmelaHanderson
      @PalmelaHanderson 4 роки тому +91

      @@machematix What's crazy is that people hold it up as some ancient custom, when in fact the Pledge of Allegiance has only been around for about 100 years, and only became a mandatory school thing in the 40's. If you really want to rile up fascists, tell them that "under God" wasn't put in until the 50's. it's pretty crazy.

    • @iSnortRockSalt
      @iSnortRockSalt 4 роки тому +53

      I remember being in middle school and we were saying the pledge of allegiance and I just kept thinking to myself, isn't this what brainwashing is. Then I had the thought we are just small mindless humans and you are making us pledge our allegiance. Odd huh.

    • @annegrey3780
      @annegrey3780 4 роки тому +26

      @@Zamtrios245 yah, why is that? And is it really still mandatory? I mean if a pledge is a "solemn promise or agreement to do or refrain from doing something" do you feel saying it every day, doing it predominantly as children when you don't really understand what it means, and not having an option in it cheapens it as a pledge? I don't know, because my country never asked me to pledge to it like that, but I put in Catholic and was forced to recite that Creed every day growing up...by the end of my schooling there I can't think of a single strain of words in the English language that meant less to me than ones I'd been mindlessly forced to recite for years as a child. So I could imagine it could have the same effect maybe?

  • @seanc6128
    @seanc6128 4 роки тому +16

    It's the pledge of allegiance that school children recite every morning, not the national anthem. That would be even more weird.

    • @TylerMcHenry
      @TylerMcHenry 4 роки тому +5

      Yeah the national anthem is for singing before domestic sporting events, which makes way more sense!

    • @seanc6128
      @seanc6128 4 роки тому

      @@TylerMcHenry 'murica

    • @remlatzargonix1329
      @remlatzargonix1329 4 роки тому

      Sean C ....uhm, yup, forcing people, especially kids, to pledge their allegiance doesn't sound too fascistic...😳😀

    • @jda79
      @jda79 4 роки тому

      @@remlatzargonix1329 it could seem that way if you don't understand what Americans pledge their allegiance too

    • @mandymaeK1
      @mandymaeK1 4 роки тому

      Canadians sing our national anthem at school. English and French. It is kinda weird

  • @RichardCranium321
    @RichardCranium321 3 роки тому +1

    "It" was the dumbest horror movie of my childhood. I can imagine that pitch meeting "Ok, so it's a Clown that's not a Clown but is in fact a monster that can be defeated with an inhaler & a slingshot."
    Now that I think back, wasn't the guys name David?
    David... with a slingshot.... taking out a monster.... haven't we all heard this plot somewhere else?? 🤔

  • @lilMaDdog376
    @lilMaDdog376 11 місяців тому +2

    🤔note to self... do not listen to Simon whistler when trying to sleep, he says the most funniest shit and instead of sleep you'll have tears in your eyes 😂😂 and not to mention the random out burst of laughter that scares the shit outta the sleeping household 🫢

  • @arikafetner
    @arikafetner 4 роки тому +16

    Simon hasn't had his cocaine yet today, he is too calm this morning....

    • @smiller3995
      @smiller3995 4 роки тому +1

      He definitely hasn't had his cocaine allegedly

    • @offrails
      @offrails 4 роки тому +3

      The drone just hasn't delivered it yet.

    • @smiller3995
      @smiller3995 4 роки тому +1

      @@offrails allegedly

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +6

      I bought some weak shit.

  • @eowyn-faramir-reads
    @eowyn-faramir-reads 4 роки тому +16

    Me : Aw Simon mentions Anna now how sweet!!
    Simon: sorry Anna in ten years
    Me: uWu 🤧😍
    *Much further along int the Blaze*
    Simon: ' making the stubble seem more prominent as the chin dries up'
    Me: Simon let's just agree that Anna needs be much older than near eleven to watch THIS particular Buisness Blaze.

  • @christopherconard2831
    @christopherconard2831 4 роки тому +14

    "Acts drunk" Good, establish an alibi.

  • @IparIzar
    @IparIzar 4 роки тому +1

    Look a the high roller here with his SFX
    That laptop yeet was very convincing, nice job.

  • @C.L.Hinton
    @C.L.Hinton 4 роки тому +18

    8:38 I'm guessing by the added fart sound that you haven't been giving Sam his due enough lately? Better watch out; he has the last laugh!
    Also 17:41 Simon, what did you do to anger Sam??

  • @thephoenixscotland
    @thephoenixscotland 4 роки тому +11

    The Columbian Marching Powder is strong with Simon today ... we like this.

  • @korlashgaming8313
    @korlashgaming8313 4 роки тому +3

    i live in the states and every time i turn on my pc windows gives me a glimpse of the "news" and i remember how much the world sucks then i see i have a new episode of Business Blaze and Simon,ETA and the gang give me hope! :D

  • @ZucchiniSlayer
    @ZucchiniSlayer 4 роки тому +34

    So Simon, when are we getting that space heater sponsorship advert?

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +1

      I do not think the heater company will do it since he's made it a point to tell us how it's dead... not the best advert ... "Need a heater that does not heat but entertains thousands of crazy people online... then buy an ETA heater... entertainment for the masses with very little electricity use"

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +1

      It IS broken right? Or did I just advertise the air in my head again?

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +3

      I'm waiting for them to reach out.

  • @pc23
    @pc23 4 роки тому +1

    Best video so far could not stop laughing ETA hacking in the beginning was so amazing. I want to see ETA do a raid shadow legends advert.

  • @z_movie_dan
    @z_movie_dan 4 роки тому +3

    ETA's lore just keeps getting better.

  • @philketteringham8163
    @philketteringham8163 4 роки тому +5

    Simon aka Boi with the Blaze I've got to say surprisingly this now become my favorite channel..... allegedly

  • @stephen8406
    @stephen8406 4 роки тому +12

    8:34 is when Sam earned his paycheck

    • @ayjamay
      @ayjamay 4 роки тому +2

      Yeah, I snorted.

  • @datawolf4680
    @datawolf4680 4 роки тому +41

    A movie about Simon could be titled "The Blatherings of the Sheep"

  • @dennismason3740
    @dennismason3740 4 роки тому +1

    If Simon had any sentient friends they would tap him on the shoulder and say "Mate...Amanita Muscara or Fly Algeric - there's your Santa Claus, my sad little friend with zero magic in his hairy life".

  • @jimmccauley2424
    @jimmccauley2424 4 роки тому

    Nothing beats sarcastic humor and you have it covered. Throwing the fake laptop was great as was popping the cork on your bottle of Scotch. Thanks for the laughs!

  • @7-ten
    @7-ten 4 роки тому +28

    Do you really think the kids sing the national anthem every day when they go to school? 😂 I think you have that confused with doing the pledge of allegiance

    • @jessicadoban2564
      @jessicadoban2564 4 роки тому +4

      Which, when ya think about it, is even more somber and bizarre......I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAGGGGGGG..GGG..GGGG

    • @ginashemeth7708
      @ginashemeth7708 4 роки тому +3

      Miss that now that I'm older.

    • @stephenwright8824
      @stephenwright8824 4 роки тому +1

      @SkillsDND It was kinda culty now wasn't it?

    • @xjunkxyrdxdog89
      @xjunkxyrdxdog89 4 роки тому +2

      Chant to the flag or you'll become a communist.

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +1

      Hahahah, yeah, I guess.

  • @ikmnification5737
    @ikmnification5737 4 роки тому +9

    Searches Google images for "Simon Whistler":
    Me: Oh, that's Simon without glasses 😬
    Me: Ooooooh, that's Simon with hair 🤨
    Google: Do you want to add "hair" to your "Simon Whistler" search? 🤣
    (Note: "UA-camr" is the second recommended search addition. "UA-cam" is seventh)

    • @DubhghlasMacDubhghlas
      @DubhghlasMacDubhghlas 4 роки тому +1

      I saw some old videos by simon when he had hair... bald simon is the best simon

  • @theMonkeyMonkey
    @theMonkeyMonkey 4 роки тому +18

    re: the alcohol one - in my neurology classes at universtity - we were introduced to korsakoff's syndrome which is the amnesia that long term alcoholics can get from the resulting alcohol induced brain damage.
    as a side note korsakoff's syndrome has been observed in young people - mainly students who go on insane drinking sprees.
    So yes drinking too much alcohol can cause brain damage.

  • @dottyjyoung
    @dottyjyoung 4 роки тому +1

    Business Blaze is the last channel Simon performs for during the day, so he's 3 Scotch's in before he hits the "record" button. You'll never convince me otherwise. We love you, mate.

  • @corvettedg8
    @corvettedg8 4 роки тому +4

    Current mood: Simon screaming "Surf Shark!" into the void

  • @robert48044
    @robert48044 4 роки тому +11

    "Ha Diddly ha ha" That's a new saying for me

  • @brianjrichman
    @brianjrichman 4 роки тому +30

    Welcome to today's Meme Accountacy...
    I'm on strike.
    I demand the "S.W." sign to be lit up again.

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +3

      I am holding the strike sign behind him too! ( I think he is waiting on one of us to send him a new transformer .... or a light for that matter!)

    • @MxPdog
      @MxPdog 4 роки тому +1

      I don't blame you Brian, I don't blame you

    • @Socks4free
      @Socks4free 4 роки тому +2

      i was wondering if you had died...

    • @brianjrichman
      @brianjrichman 4 роки тому +2

      @@Socks4free nope. My posts rely on Simon inning them or they just get buried with less than a dozen likes. If he pins them they get up to over a thousand likes.

    • @DoverNDollysMom
      @DoverNDollysMom 4 роки тому +2

      @@brianjrichman Simon is falling down on the job! And since the theme of today's comments is misspelling, I just can not resist telling you that you've missed the P in pinning! Don't hate me, I AM standing here holding the Brian strike sign!

  • @Livelaughlimpbizkit
    @Livelaughlimpbizkit 4 роки тому +3

    I love how much of your personality comes out in this channel

  • @a.robertson730
    @a.robertson730 11 місяців тому +2

    These are the Blazes I miss

  • @GaaaageE
    @GaaaageE 4 роки тому +2

    Total feel you Simon, name 10 random movies and I probably haven’t seen 9 of them. People verbally abuse me for this 😂

    • @GaaaageE
      @GaaaageE 4 роки тому

      Oh and I’m getting frozen too lol just got to that part.

  • @TheEDFLegacy
    @TheEDFLegacy 4 роки тому +14

    I see that sneaky edit...
    Next time on Business Blaze: Times when Simon was wrong.
    😅

  • @Kenkire
    @Kenkire 4 роки тому +6

    18:50 Hey Simon. What's the difference between an Irish funeral and and Irish wedding? One less drunk.

  • @613aristocrat
    @613aristocrat 4 роки тому +7

    "Things" is mispelled. Also, I really want a video on Alibaba.

  • @mdansbyjr
    @mdansbyjr 4 роки тому +2

    Simon, your apathy is something that keeps bringing me back ... that and Sam's memes ... and concern for Danny's basement accommodations.

  • @KevynKing
    @KevynKing 3 роки тому +1

    Getting an ad for high speed internet immediately after Simon's fucked up really made that even funnier to me.

  • @fiction-
    @fiction- 4 роки тому +6

    Re: In the Air Tonight: You uh, really need to listen to that song again lol

  • @ReversibleOctopus
    @ReversibleOctopus 4 роки тому +5

    I love how ETA is breaking all of Simon's other electricals one-by-one.
    (Bar the camera, how else will he spread his holy word?).
    Is the transformer for the SW light totally mullered now? :D

  • @randallflagg9498
    @randallflagg9498 4 роки тому +28

    So simon got both the lyrics and the tune to “in the air tonight” wrong. Gotta keep up his reputation I guess.

    • @moreisallyouneed4175
      @moreisallyouneed4175 4 роки тому +2

      Thats because Simon and Danny actually wrote the whole song but that FRAUD Collins cut them out in the 11th hour. Why do I have to explain this to you!? C'Mon!!!! ♡

    • @randallflagg9498
      @randallflagg9498 4 роки тому +1

      More is all you need damn!!! I bet that’s what business blaze is REALLY all about. Build up enough fans and loyal followers, then rally the troops for “in the Blaze tonight” revolution!!
      Allegedly

    • @ComXDude
      @ComXDude 4 роки тому +2

      But is he like this in worlds on other levels of the Dark Tower?

    • @moreisallyouneed4175
      @moreisallyouneed4175 4 роки тому +1

      @@ComXDude watch out for the walking dude!!

    • @brainblaze6526
      @brainblaze6526  4 роки тому +3

      This is true.

  • @decaydance2010
    @decaydance2010 4 роки тому +1

    I love the different surfshark intros. This one is up there with the 90’s hacking required sunglasses