Grief is excruciating. I didn’t want to live. I just wanted to go to heaven to be with Jesus and my awesome man. Thank you for sharing. Jesus is awesome.
Hello Lydia I certainly understand what you say here. I sure do. But , we both have a reason and purpose for being here at this time. I believe. Although I'm not certain what that will be or is yet. Jesus, will be our new bride , who can understand it all. Soon we will be there, before we know it.... It's gonna be good, No, it's gonna be Amazing ....God bless...💪☝️🕊
My wife and I celebrated our 20th anniversary in Sept '23. On Jan 5, 2024 she said she was feeling a little tired. I tucked her into her favorite recliner with her new Christmas blanket, got her a glass of water, topped off a humidifier since she'd been fighting a cold and went into the other room to hang out with our 14 year old autistic son so that she could rest. A couple of hours later I went to take the dog out and noticed that her lips were white. She was gone, she was 52. It's only been 13 days but it's been a very surreal 13 days. I've been ping ponging around those stages of grief that you hear about. The thing that was really tearing me up was doubt and anger. How did I fail to see that she was dying? Was I too wrapped up in my own head to notice that she needed me? How could she not tell me? Why didn't she call for an ambulance? The anger and guilt felt like a real blade slicing through my chest and gut. Then the night before last I was given a gift that let me breathe again. Our son is semi verbal autistic. One of his obsessions is that he constantly films everything on his iPad and makes little movies with it. I've grumbled in the past that it feels like living with a narc, you never know when you're on camera. The night before last I was backing up electronics so that no pictures of Kim were lost when I started on his iPad. He had filmed me cooking his dinner, if you can call heating up a frozen pizza cooking. He had filmed me getting my wife all her meds, her water, her blanket, etc. I got to see her smiling and acting normally. He filmed me putting the cat in her lap and giving the dog a milk bone. All this was probably within 30 minutes of her passing. She was asking me to grab her various things and was thanking me for taking care of everything. She was happy. There were no red flags. She didn't know what was about to happen. There's no way that I could have known from the way she was acting. I wasn't a self absorbed a-hole, at least not in this situation. I was able to let go of the guilt and anger. It felt like a warm hand of grace touched my heart and granted me some peace. I'll never complain about being on camera again. We have a very long way to go but I don't have to doubt or hate myself over not saving her. That's a tangible gift. Hearing stories like yours helps. It gives me some perspective and a heads up on what's coming my way.
This comment just gripped me to my very core.. I am SO very sorry for what you are going through. I cannot even imagine that kind of scenario, but.. I do know something about SUDDEN and unexpected loss, and I have to say that there is nothing harder in this world. My husband was on the autism spectrum himself, as am I .. so I have a very soft spot for any family with an autistic member. I know this is so much to process right now for both you and your son. I definitely know about the doubts and anger and I am so sorry you are going through this. I beat myself up in the same ways, over and over again. How could I not even know my husband was so ill? How could I have prevented this? Could I have prevented it? But the truth is.. sometimes these things hit out of the blue, with no warning. Your wife may have just thought it was a cold that was no big deal. She may not have known it was serious either. Sometimes things like this come so suddenly that there is no warning. My heart goes out to you. I truly believe that autism is a gift. Having it myself, and with a husband who had it, I can see now how our extreme obsessions can sometimes be a gift from God that allows us to excel in a certain area for a reason. My husband did the same thing with filming things and making videos. I know your son is a gift, and I encourage you to praise his talents. He may very well turn out to be a movie maker one day - Steven Spielberg has autism and his creativity lead him to create some truly amazing movies! You just never know what your son may do one day. Encourage that. Support that. Tell him he is AMAZING and gifted. (I'm sure you already do... but I just love to encourage it.) I'm so glad that his videos helped you to have peace and to let go of the anger. By the way - you have an incredible gift for writing. You are talented in this area. Reading your words here is like reading a beautiful storybook, because of your writing style. Even through the sadness and the grief and the pain, you gave all of us here a gift with your eloquent words. You never know what you and your son might do together one day with such talents. God bless you... God bless you both.. and I pray that this channel and others may help you as you begin this journey.
@@WeepingWidowSueAna Thank you so much for your kind words. Luckily our son is doing better than expected with the situation. He's a strong young man. I think that he's probably doing better than I am. He has had people that worked with him 8 years ago in kindergarten show up to help him. It has been humbling how many people have showed up for our boy. So many of them loved my wife and love my son. Being active in the special needs community introduces you to some of the best people on the planet. One small silver lining to this situation is seeing the kindness and light in others that we are usually too busy to notice. So many people have gone out of their way to share kindness and comfort with me and my son. The first 10 days until I saw the video that he made of his Mom were pretty rough. I couldn't sleep so I was up reading, researching and watching videos about loss. I saw several of your videos and they helped me as well. I never thought I'd willingly watch a video of someone else experiencing pain but when you are a fellow member of the club it relieves some of the loneliness and helps me prepare for some of the thoughts and emotions I'll be going through down the road. Thanks for your kindness and thank you for sharing your video's. They do help.
@@RobertJung-bj3fo I don't know how you've found the strength to deal with that for close to two years. The first 10 days until I found my sons video were the worst days of my life. I'm still getting those rogue waves of emotion that surprise you out of the blue. For the past few days every time the pain and anxiety rachet up I think back on the video and remember Kim smiling at me and thanking me for getting her tucked in for her nap. The medical examiner determined that she had some pneumonia in her right lung. Something that was easily treatable. She had told me earlier in the day that if she didn't shake the cough in a day or two she was going to call her doctor and get some antibiotics. Neither of us knew how bad it was. That's something that has gone through my head a lot the last two weeks, 'If I had only known...'. But we didn't know. If I dwell on that rabbit hole too much then I will end up in a very dark place. My wife's birthday is St Patrick's day, just 4 days after our son's birthday and three weeks after mine, she would have been 53. Seeing all the Valentines Day displays all over the place isn't helping. I'm just trying to focus how to navigate birthdays, holidays, Mothers Day and all that for our son. I'm not the best equipped for handling all that. My wife was a cheerleader in every sense of the word. I used to tease her that it always looked like Santa and half his elves threw up all over our house. She would have several trees scattered around the house with different motifs. If one of us had a birthday the whole neighborhood knew from all the decorations. She'd break out face paints and crafts just for the fun of it. Always so positive and enthusiastic. Not sure how I can make these occasions nearly as fun for our son when I just don't have that talent and am half dead inside. I keep reading how men need to find some kind of organized support network. Women seem to do better with loss since they are more fluent in the language of emotion. With a little arm twisting some of my wife's friends found an online grief group and talked me into signing up, there may have been some threats involved. One of her friends is a 'retired' biker chick from a 1% group so I paid attention to her well intentioned threats. So I get to start talking about all my emotions this monday. Oh boy, just what every guy wants to do, talk about their emotions. I was raised in an Army family, born on base and all that, so the extent of my emotional training as a child was 'I'll give you a reason to cry if you don't stop'. I have a very long way to go, not looking forward to the trip but I'll do what I have to for the kid. My wife was a militant mama bear, if I don't do everything in my power to give our son a happy and normal life she's the type that would come back down and skin me with a rusty butter knife. That gives me an anchor and plots my course at least. I hope you can find some peace.
@@npenick66 You are very welcome, and I am glad all of the various videos on loss are helping you. I agree with you - I certainly never expected to be watching videos on loss, but those first months, there was nothing else that comforted me except watching others go through the same pain. It makes you feel like someone out there understands. No one else around me understood at all, and I had very little support. I am so glad that you and your son have great people around you, supporting you and reaching out. That makes a world of difference. The special needs community is indeed one of the best there is. So much love and support and that is so needed. I am glad that Len's videos are a comfort to you. Watching his videos and others are what held my head above water the first months. God bless you, and thank you for the kind response.
Sad story. I know how you feel. My wife passed away 14 months ago (Sept 23). Cried hard for many months. Still do now and then when I hear a song or think of thinks we did. I miss her terribly. You do start living a normal life again, but there is always someone missing and whatever you do is never the same. Keep the good memories alive.
My wife passed last June, but she never left. She will be with me forever, and that's a blessing... I'm a lucky man to have her in my life and I'm grateful... Not many people are that lucky...
(HUG)God bless you. Jesus is my first love, It's been 2 weeks since I lost the love of my life on earth, he has been with me 55 years, took care of me, loved me, we worked together he was always by my side helping me, always. I know as the song goes by "Casting Crowns" The only scars in heaven are on the Hands that hold you now, Lord Jesus help me get through this grief. I too want to stay home in the house we shared together, going out is so difficult, paying all the bills etc. that he took care of, and trying to save my house, I too go for daily walks thanking God for him and asking Him to help me to get through this trauma, I know we all must face adversity, but Jesus is with us in everything we face in life helping us to get through it. I pray for you in your loss, of Cindy pray for me in my loss of Bruce in Jesus Name, Amen, so be it.
God sends us lessons to learn, and many of them send us into depression and emotional turmoil. However, he does not expect us to spend the rest of our life living that pain over and over. He wants us to learn a lesson from it and move on from it. My husband just passed away August 4, 2024. We were together 27 years. I cannot allow myself to fall into depression and give up on everything I’ve worked towards my whole life. My husband has God with him now I can stop worrying about him and start worrying about myself. It’s the best gift I can give God and my husband is to live my best life. I pray that everyone on this channel realizes God wants you to be happy and so does your partner.
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s been 5.5 months for me and it does not get any easier. 😢 He had been in my life for 16 years. Every single day I cry because there is nothing I can do to bring him back.
I just lost my husband of 59 years 3 months ago and have known him since we were kids. I can hardly breath and the grief is unbearable. My kids aren't around and it's just me now. We didn't have a support network so it's difficult to be alone. I have trouble now just getting out. I have an illness where I am learning to walk again, he was my caretaker and now he's gone. It's really difficult but we have to keep faith and be grateful for the day and let the tears fall when and where they may. It will get better, trying to find the wisdom in my grief not just endure it. Blessings, God does watch over us and so do our loved ones.
Hi my name is Rob I lost my wife on this day 2/22/22/ it's has bin a very difficult road my God was it! I thought I was going crazy and I probably was. it was so Hard I still sleeping with her Robe every night right next to me it gives me something of comfort I know she is around it's the only thing I no that helps me we will be with are soul mate again and what a Happy day or night that will be to really see her again but I just really pray that she will be the same there as she was here and I can still love her like the way I did here and I pray that Heaven is kinda like her in alot of ways and Heaven is not like a perfect place and she is different I love the way she was here Amy was not perfect in any way that is why I loved her the way I did..and she loved me for the way I was I was losing my hair but she didn't care it was the way how she loved me that mattered not the way I looked..if I can't be with Amy like she was here and she is really different on the other side like Different!!! My Heaven to me would be like she was here living together growing together eating together working together..I miss her everyday and it's not like I miss her just when I think of her it's all the time..I remember saying to my sister when this happened to us I told here my sister! I know what God does he or she? Truly try to make you forget the grief that you have now that's the love pouring out of you and in time you will not feel as bad as u do right now you will never forget him but that pain u have now will slowly go away I no it's hard to understand that now..and I am not saying it's good but u will lose something that I am trying to hold on to and thats my grief because it's the only thing that keeps us still together if that makes any sense it's like u become different in a way because u will have no choice so if I am changing in a way will Amy change alot in Heaven will I still know her will she feel the same love for me there or will her love be like a mom's love or a Dads..that's what keeps me up some times at night..you take care of yourself and remember your husband is always around you u might not see him but he is there just like Amy is aways with me..be true to God and talk to God he can here you and your Husband also can...that's why I keep on talking to her every day in my mind or out loud I even hold he hand when I wake through parking lots going in to a store I put my hand out like I aways did don't it make me feel better yes it does..and if just that little thing makes me feel better than that's ok!! ROB
@@RobertJung-bj3fo Thats a sweet tribute to Amy. Love is a double edged sword. One side is love which is sharp and helps us through life, the other is loss, which is sharp and painful. Loss is a part of life. A painful part which happens to either the wife or the husband at some point. Sounds like you were blessed to have a beautiful relationship with her. God bless you.
Understand completely what youre going through. Its going on 4 yrs for me and l can’t say its much better now except l don’t cry all the time. Functioning and existing is not the same as living but no one can understand it that hasn’t gone through it. The best way to describe it is there’s a big hole in the atmosphere that follows me around everywhere and it never fills up or goes away. Physical challenges add to the experience. So sorry to hear you have this to deal with on top of grief. I am also having difficulties walking and getting around from old injuries and can certainly sympathize with the physical pain added to the emotional. My relationship with Jesus has enabled me to endure, but after all the advice, books, videos, suggestions and attempts to overcome grief, lve stopped trying to do that anymore. I go to church because the bible says to go even so much more as we see the day of the Lord approaching, which is obvious nowadays. I read the bible because its all that really matters in the end. I pray because the Lord hears me and it doesn’t make Him uncomfortable for me to cry or be sad. I rejoice in the Lord because He is the most important thing in life, He is life. So all l can say about losing my love is that all focus has turned to Christ, to prayer, to whatever He wants me to do or say or go. Actually, nothing else matters. Perhaps that’s the purpose of loss for believers; to cut us loose from all earthly ties. Its not that l don’t love my other family. I go see my mom in the Alzheimer’s unit, l visit with my sister and keep grandkids sometimes and talk to my son and daughters. They are all wonderful. But the loss is always there. Lost the big diamond out of my wedding ring a few months ago. That broke my heart. Its in the jewelry box now but l had never stopped wearing it before then. Never think about ever having anyone else in my life. That’s actually a sickening thought, so this is it. Im here with Jesus, my Maker is my husband and we’re making it work. Anyway, just know that you’re walking a path that many ppl are walking and God keeps count of our tears, the Bible says. Prayers and blessings on you my sister in Christ. He is our comforter. 🌻🙏
I lost my loving husband of 57 years, 24 months ago. I cry everyday and miss him so much. The pain in my heart gets worse every day. I don’t believe will go away. 😢😢
Hello Rita, I'm so sorry for the great loss you are now experiencing in your body soul and spirit . 57 years is all of your lifes joys and pains stamped into your heart. You can never describe the anguish you carry constantly in words , to anyone but those who have been through this terrible journey of griefs effects on the person you have now become. Separated from the Love in the physical, yet your memories of the best part of lifes experiences will relive in your mind for months and years. I thank God for those memories both good and not so good, all a part of who we were ,together. I can say with some certainty, that the pain of your trauma, will lessen in time. But time will tell, we all heal differently and at are own pace. Many have said to me and others that grief is our love , with no place to go. I believe it. My prayer to you is for God's peace and strength to carry you thru your grief journey each day and each night. God bless my friend....🙏🕊♥️💪
Thanks for your courage in putting yourself out there, Len. I lost Debi three months ago. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer in January 2019. Median life expectancy for diagnosis is measured in months, I had her for four years. Mostly asymptomatic. What a gift! But after multiple surgeries, chemo, radiology, immunotherapy and participating in two clinical trials, even with the best medical care available, her immune system finally couldn't keep up. The weakness made her vulnerable to pneumonia and I lost her physical presence. After 25 years of living in own two person universe, I'm now left unsupervised. But not alone. Because she has never left me, she lives in my heart. As close to me as my breath. I miss her fiercely and my grief is profound. I expect to always have it. I won't try to get rid of it, but if the shock and pain recedes some, I would be grateful. But if facing waves of grief for the rest of my life is the price I pay to keep our love alive, bring it.
Yes, I am a widow and I know you are a widower and the grief is the same as people just think the after two weeks you automatically should be fine another person but that’s not how it works because when God calls your soulmate home, have you gone have the person you used to be because you used to be a teamand half of it is gone and people don’t understand that
Unfortunately i know how you feel. My wife of 40 years passed to the other side the day before thanksgiving in 2022. Im not sure if it gets easier, im not sure of anything anymore. Maybe ive become used to it, people say you have to move forward. What does that even mean, just going through the motions of everyday life can be a real task. I want my life back but shes gone forever. No matter what anybody says about, youre not alone. I walk this path by myself.
I lost my wife in 2022 nafter a 222 years battle with Parkinson's , I am in mourning for her everyday ,it does not get easier when we are left alone ,I did get help from grief consuling for awhile but I think men have a lot harder time alone in life espeaciallly when as were childless.I am lucky to have relatives to care for me ,but also know widowers with no family and there are few short fixes but if grief is overwhelming at the cost of ones own health get professional care asap.
Just came across your video--- this is 2024-- it has been almost 2 years since I lost Paul. Yes- we were married 68 years!! I know!!! A life time!!! No words can ever say!! No way to tell!! Blessings
Thank you for sharing. I lost my lovely wife, Darla, on December 21, 2023. She was diagnosed with stage 4 gallbladder cancer on April 27, 2023. She fought through two different kinds of chemo, but the cancer was unrelenting. She passed away at home with me, my daughter and her daughter by her side, holding her hands. She was 55 years young. We were only together 6 years, married for 4 years. The deep, deep love we shared is certainly commensurate with the pain I am feeling right now. I just started back to work 2 days ago. It helps with giving me something else to think about, but I have had a few moments of heavy grief while at work. I'll keep keeping on and work through this, it's what she would have wanted. Take care of yourself.
It has been just over a month. We were together close to ten years, but what a ride it was. We fought cancer together two years and she eventually passed. Yeah, this grief is a wild ride. I hope you are doing better.
I discovered your channel only now, Len. Thank you for your heartfelt videos. I lost my wife of 23 years in July, 2021. After more than 2 years, it is beginning to get a little better. However, I still do not derive any joy in life and I barely talk to anyone. For most part, I avoid people since I cannot relate to people who are not intensely grieving. Not sure whether that would ever change. I felt a kinship with you when I watched your videos. Thank you!
I understand, I lost my wife Nov. of 21. It is so very hard and smiles are still few. But I like Len believe I will be with my wife again, and with my Lord Jesus. Keeps me moving forward slowly. Wishing you Peace and Comfort.
Thank you for commenting bert, You and I are close in our length of time in marriage and grief. It is always good to hear from anyone that is walking the same road. Somehow it helps lessen the hurting. God bless my friend...
I know the pain of a broken heart and what you are going through. So sorry for your loss of your loving wife. I lost my precious husband RAY 20months ago. He was and still is the love of my life. 💔I cry for him everyday. How l miss him. He was the best thing that ever happened to me and was my everything, my soulmate, my world and my reason for living. Thankyou for sharing this video. You are not alone my friend.... Grief is the price of love... And we truly loved them❤They will be forever in our broken hearts😢💔🙏
Jesus lives in my heart my dearest darling husband died last year Nov 2021 like u iv often felt like I wanted to die to be with him but like u I'm slowly starting to feel slightly able to cope yeah NEW life that u do not want my precious husband is with Jesus my beautiful mum went to be with her Saviour Jesus last year too they are waiting for me to join them I can hardly wait
Thank you Tracy. Your comment is a great one to read. Jesus offers hope. Thank God He gave us this new hope. I too can't wait either, But we have to wait our appointed time. I have to ask God for patience everyday, after telling him I'm ready to go today. It may not be a long wait , we just don't know for sure. May God bring you a blessed new Year, and beyond. 🙏🕊
I “accidentally” came up on this on my Utube. I’m so very sorry for your loss and deep grief. My husband passed a year ago. He wasn’t a believer but I was given the gift to tell him how much our Lord loved him just before he passed. I really believe I was the right person at the right time and he passed peacefully. I miss him greatly and always will. We were married almost 34 years. I’m now in the process of moving on to whatever God has for me. Not putting a blanket on the holes, but filling them with other things. I hope you are doing much better now. Thank you for being transparent in sharing of your grief. God Bless
I lost my wife two months ago after 40 years of marriage. You have described exactly how I am feeling now and your life situation mirrors my own, except I have children who are a great comfort for me. Thank you for this video Let's keep praying for each other.
I lost my incredible wife of 33 years completely unexpectedly, just 2 months ago yesterday. The pain is unbelievable - I could never have imagined such a thing. I've lost my parents, but I was not prepared for this. She is with Jesus, of that I am certain. That is the knowledge that keeps me plugging along down this bumpy road. I'm thankful I found your channel Len. I understand a year has passed for you as I write this, but you'll be in my prayers.
Im so Sorry for the loss of your dear beloved wife my friend. 33 years together is long time to bond and make those very special memories, which you will need now. Yes , I made it this far. 2years plus, God only knows how. It is a heartache like no other, and rightly so. Godly Marriage by definition is a union of heart soul and mind. When that is broken ,deep pain and loneliness become your friend. Grief is it's name. This is so hard sometimes to accept, but it will only be temporal. Healing will begin in time followed by a deep understanding of God's sovereignty and His perfect Love found only in our relationship with Him through Jesus Christ our savior our Lord and our God. All things I thought I knew before, I really know them now. Prayers tonight for you my friend for peace and guidance... In , Jesus name, amen
@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Thank you Len, for your prayers, thoughts and words of wisdom and encouragement. This experience has absolutely vectored my attention onto Jesus and what He has planned for my life from this point forward. God bless you sir.
"Blessed are they they mourn, for they shall be comforted." Thank you for sharing your journey with such simplicity and humility. Lost my spouse two years ago.
Hi Lisa , thank you for reminding me of those blessed words of our Lord. I really haven't read those words of Jesus since my wife went home. That was a gift, thanks ...needed that...
I lost my wife of 44 years 4/22/19. I am like you, I have no children and no brothers or sisters like you. Every ones life goes on and they have their own problems. My wife was lucky to not see what the world turned into since 2020. I will be happy to leave this world there is nothing here for me.
Hello Charlie, you are right, this world has begun to decline in many areas in many ways. I feel a change is coming, though I don't know when. I'm sorry for your loss, you are like me in many ways, and feelings......I can feel so alone in a crowd even friends the few that still live. Most have a spouse to share in this life yet. It's so different for us. There is only my faith that has kept me going, and prayers from many who know just how I feel. Keep in touch Charlie ok, I'll be praying for you. May God bring you peace this very day...
Len my wife fought 3 different cancers over 9 years, the last one being pancreatic cancer. I hope god was merciful and your wife didnt suffer 9 years. Life is hard from the minute we are born till we die, after 73 years i still havent found the meaning of life but pain and suffering.
@@charliehargrave7458 hello Charlie, it is hard to except this fact we are born, then dying every day after wards. It is a mystery why God allows this. There were many times I wanted to stop believing in him. I haven't seen the horrors of death up close, or felt the excruciating pain of some disease or cancers that are unchartable on the pain scale. There is so much I do not understand about all this suffering. But one thing I do know is my wife had 3 different types of cancer also, and each one she believed God would heal her. I believed her. I wanted to believe God, I tried to believe God, but I trusted her feelings over God's. And he did heal her in the end. She believed that was all I needed to believe. Talking about a God who you don't trust in our believe in any more is not easy to do. I was so angry so very angry at God for letting here survive cancers and then get covid and then lose the battle the cancer began. Did he not know how much I loved her didn't he care how much pain he was dumping on me........ I thought he was a loving God. What just happened........my faith was never really that strong, almost non existent at that time... but now thru the prayers of others, the crying to God on my knees begging for answers, I have slowly understood his nature, the who, He is. I don't know what your true feelings are , but the God of the universe is real I have seen his hands work, heard his voice in written words and felt his love in my tears. Who can understand this all. He loves you and he certainly loves your dear wife. We can talk more about this if you want, I have a video about the angels that visited my wife before she died. This is all I can give you right now, my heart goes out you, please keep in touch, ok...
I’m sorry for your loss. It’s very hard. I lost my husband last month too after 31 years. Your voice is important to those grieving. Thank you for posting because I know I’m searching every day for people who understand. Your cat is beautiful. ❤
Thank you for your comments jennifer. I can only say this is the most pain I have ever felt in my entire life. The hurt is still there, I cried pretty good this beautiful sunday morning just walking in our yard kicking around a few fall leaves. You are not alone. Only we who hold our precious memories of our so dearly missed loved ones in our hearts, can appreciate how important it is to hear from others, (and there are many, ) who share in this incomprehensible journey. I will add you to my prayer list ,if that's ok.... may God bless you....
"Hang in there and keep trying"...so true, it's all you can do. So sorry for your loss. It's just over a year for me and that first year was so very, very dark. Gradually you learn how to live with it and start living again. I also found a lot of healing by getting out walking, being in nature. Thank you for your post. It helps to know we aren't alone in our feelings.
I am 50 years old and lost my lovely wife of 18 years quickly on January 27th 2023. People ask me how are you doing and my response is it doesn't feel real. And they look at me weird. Am I crazy or do understand what I mean? I have had some really awful days and I have days with bad thoughts (that's all I will say or admit). I do not know how to move forward without my wife. Am I going crazy when I say it does not feel real? God bless you and your family. God bless Texas!
You are doing really well , walking , exercising and mostly God is the right medication. I just lost my husband of 48 years so I understand the crying you described. Praying for all of you going through this--God Bless you all.
I feel your sadness, i lost my husband last month and i know how it feels. I also felt the wanting to die to be with him because this sadness is unbearable. What i do is whenever i know that the feeling of wanting to cry is coming to hit me i distract myself. Go out to forget. Leave the tv on all night so i can sleep because i dont have anyone to talk. Sorry for your loss. And hugs to you. Only us who go through this can understand this journey.
Thank you for your comment lea, I can say with some degree of certainty I know how you feel. This hurt is here to stay, but it will ease a little ,in time. May God bless you with peace...
Lea, I know how you feel! I have on the computer much more to hear voices and get input from others. I too had to choose to keep on living, it would have been so easy to follow. I can't go out much because of money but the home has so much of him, it's easy to stay. My sleep is not regular, but I walk the dog daily and I'm starting to try to eat better foods. Journaling has helped indeed. Hugs to you too. Jane
@@akfinn5308 the other day i got hit again with sadness. Been crying again. I just don’t know how to stop my yearning. There days im ok but no days that i did not think of my husband. I want to go out but nowhere to go. Some of my friends are busy. He died in our bedroom 3 weeks after we moved in our new house. The hard part is my sister and some friends thought that our grieving is easy to deal that our brain is easy to train. Mu sleep is not regular too. Since he passed i always wake up between 3-3:30am. So hard to live everyday without him.😔🥲
@@leasanksen2500 My heart goes out to you so much. It's so hard. Most days I have no idea what to even do with myself. I just wander around like a lost kitten in a huge scary forest not knowing what to do or which way to go. Hugs.
Thank you for sharing your experience. We were married for 45 years, and I lost her right before Christmas 2023. It's hard for sure but it does get a little better over time.
Hello Rick. I'm sorry my friend , Losing your dear wife is a hurt beyond measure. I know that first year was a ruff ride . My 2nd was easier in someways but new emotional burdens appeared. The finality of it became more real and took me down the last few steps to the bottom. I thank God for prayers from others and the pleading to God from my own anguished soul . I survived those long days and longer nights with God's help. I had nothing left. I hope and pray for God to give you the strength and peace only He can provide. It will make the difference. God bless.....
You seem like a kind, wonderful man. I will pray for you, Len. I've been a widow for 8 years. I'm 75 and still working - that helps. I try to keep busy. I'll pray for you! God Bless!
I lost my beloved wife 1 month ago after 35 years of marriage the damn pancreatic cancer took her away from me it is the most painful feeling ever I only implore to the almighty Lord to give me the strength and courage to survive this pain 😢
God will sustain you my friend . You will walk through a field of thorns, but roses will appear now and then if only briefly. Time is the adaption, tears are the healing. Love will never die. Take care my friend.. God bless
I know what you're going through. I lost my wonderful husband almost two months ago (we have been together for 26 years) and it's been agony. I feel like I'm getting on better than I was in the beginning and just when I think I'm getting a handle on it, I'm right back to crying my eyes out. It's very hard indeed. I never understood why anyone would contemplate taking their own life after a loss like that, but now I get it, not that I will do that myself, but I totally understand why now. I appreciate your honesty in this video and I'm very sorry for the loss of your wife. Very sorry.
Good for you to have the courage to endure this process, and share with others. You help others as you share your story, and it helps you heal as well. You are brave and courageous as you try to find this reality. You will make it, just not quickly or easily. I know you must have been a great husband.
One thing that has helped me greatly to take me to my next level is not only accepting my wife is gone is the fact that nobody cares about my problems. Yes it hurts deeply when everyone disappears bit they have their own problems and they just don’t care about yours. It will make you a more caring person yourself because you know how it feels so you will become much more empathetic to everyone. It has really helped me to start plowing a new path in my life as I try to re discover myself. I plowed a lath for us when we met and now thats shes gone I have to pull the old plow back out of the shed and do it all over again. At least this time I’m smarter and wiser and know how to deal with the rocks and roots better than I did the first time around.
Thank you for your sharing, I had lost my wife of 31 years, at the end of May. Like you we had no children, her sisters, and brother have families and my only brother also has two children. With the holidays beginning next week will be a rough going, I'll just say that I live "one day at a time". Even less than that sometimes. Len, I'm on my journey thru grief also. And despite what ANYONE says, it ok to cry, we're going to cry, we're supposed to cry, IT IS OK FOR MEN TO CRY. Anyone, who says otherwise, ignore them. If possible. My prayer to you, is that you, I, and others who lost there loved one(s), enjoy the rest of our lives and that when our turn comes, we may be with them. 🙏 PEACE BE WITH YOU!
Thank you for your comment rjprack, tears have been my friend for awhile now. I do have days where they are few and far between. Time has been one fact the experts have gotten right. It is time, and God's grace that has brought me through this grief thus far. My mornings and nights can still be rough, but staying busy with things during the day helps me get past another lonely day. My wife is waiting for me in heaven, and that is a big motivation to keep going in God's will, for me here. You must go thru these holidays just like me, hope you can share with your family. God's peace to you my friend...
Yes, people that lose a spouse a year to three years down the road they meet in Mary again they did not meet their truth so when you meet your true soulmate, there is no one else out there for you. You don’t know won’t no one else because you found the love of your life, and there’s nobody that can measure up to him or her so you live your life alone and I’m one of those people that met my true soulmate and met my soulmate. I don’t want nobody else. I don’t need nobody else because I found the ultimate love in my husband, and probably the ultimate love in your life. I feel for you, brother. I’m praying for you and please pray for me in the name of Jesus Christ. I pray amen.
I also lost my wife in july of this year. We were together for 41 years. It’s a tough road buddy I get it. I’m also in Michigan. I’m alone as well. No kids either.
Thanks for speaking up and out. This is hard no matter what the length of time together. Time has been passing quickly, this has been a good thing. You hang in there too. GOD bless. Snow tonight....
loss my wife of 62.5 years and my grieving still goes on after 2.5 years, it is starting to be a little easier but the tears still flow.its not easy, in my case i have children and that is what keeps me going.God bless you.
I was very fortunate because I have a good friend who unfortunately had already gone through this and she walked me right through and told me all my weird feelings were normal. She kept promising me I would smile again and told me to hang on for that year of firsts. I think she was afraid I would harm myself. My husband passed very suddenly, no warning and I thought I would die. I have survived though and I do smile now and I think he would be very proud of me.
Thank you for commenting Sandra. What a blessing to have such a friend. A friend like that is never wished for but given in our time of need. God bless my friend...♥️🙏☝️🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Yes, I am so thankful for my friend. She helped me and I have tried to help others who are going through it now. As a matter of fact, I just ran into an old friend who lost his wife three years ago. He asked me if it gets easier or if you just get used to it. I think as time goes by it is just easier to handle. I can now laugh and tell funny stories and look at pictures and I do fine. :)
Amen you said it brother or you know your loved one is in heaven and you are crying and morning Your loss and your loss is very important that most people don’t understand. Thank you for bringing this to the forefront. Yes time goes on and yes we move forward but there’s still that stopping place that God called him home that we used to be a couple and you have to move on, it is so hard my soul mate almost 11 years ago and I can’t cannot still carry on without him. I am stuck in my heart, but I know time goes on and they say carry care of everything but no it does nothing.
I am sitting in hospice as I type this. I fear the next few weeks. My gf of 14 years is dying of cancer, I don’t know how I am going to deal with this.
I did a search and found your channel on UA-cam. I lost my wife for 34 years five months ago. After a 2 1/2 year long illness. I am experiencing everything that you describe. At age 65 I find myself all alone in the world. This frightens me more than anything. Research tells me that the second and third year could be even worse. I pray that they’re wrong. Thank you for your video. It helps to hear others going through what you were going through.
Im in the same boat Brother, almost identical story except Im 53 and we were friends since 14 and started dating at 17 in 11th grade. What a beautiful woman in every way. This video really helped to encourage me through this. Its been one month since she passed. She encouraged me to remarry because she wanted me to be happy. She told me to be patient and Ill find someone special.
Thank you, sir. That was sorely needed. The Lord Jesus lives in my heart too. He is on the Throne. He is Sovereign. His ways are not our ways; His thoughts, are not our thoughts. He has miraculously sustained me during my darkest days. Private and intimate times with the Lord, talking/crying to Him and reading His precious Word, have comforted my broken heart. His Spirit, living in me, is stronger than my grieving flesh. I am in the Hand of the Great, I AM. (Australia)
Hello Carol Mitchell. Your wonderful words here have lifted, and will continue to lift many more out of a valley of darkness, if only for a moment. This grief has a purpose, and it will continue to reach out to hold you tightly in it grasp. I have learned that my only way to deal with the symptoms of these terrible wounds is to lay them at the cross. It sounds to simple, but it really is. " You shall seek me and you shall find me, when you search for me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29: 13. I believe this. My road was very dark and lonely in the begining of this journey. Keeping my focus on heaven, my future home has helped me progress each week or even day. I can imagine you there maybe on bended knees, like me, pouring everything I had to give unto His throne of mercy. I still need His mercy,his new mercy every day. The love of God sustains us. He loves everyone, but he hates sin. I'm just a worthless sinner saved by the grace of God. I thank my beautiful wife for reminding me of God's love for us all. Your words are inspiring. Thank you so much....🙏🕊 May God bless you and yours ...☝️
Sir, my heart goes out to you. I too, am a recent widower of 25 years to my beloved wife. She died in my arms suddenly it’s been four months since I am posting this to you. I tried to find things and ways to occupy my time. My marriage to her was structured, but a lot of fun and good times. I had my set routines with her and right now, I try to think of things to fill that void, blessings to you, sir.
Thank you for commenting. My heart has been where yours is ,and it doesn't want to go back. I know the pain of those early days all to well. God keep you close to His side as you journey through this terrible hurting grief. Take care my friend....
Your words touch my heart. My husband of 30 years passed 88 days ago and also was a Christian. My faith sustains me, but this walk is hard. Thank you for sharing this. You’ve helped me today. Trusting it will get easier for us both.
Thank you for your comment O&M, 88 days , you are still in a very hard place . The faith in our LORD GOD, is the most important part of these Rollercoaster rides our grief takes us on. Jesus won't stop the ride, in most instances, but He will surely ride with us. I have had pain and sorrow that can't be measured by any scale the experts have provide thus far. The price of Love is a price we can only pay with our bereavements displays. Our tears are not lost, God keeps them in a bottle . How precious and Loving is this awesome God we believe in. Time does and will bring some healing. One day, maybe soon, we can once again hold our beloved in are longing reaching arms. It will happen...May God bring peace and joy this holiday season to you and yours. HOPE is still alive....
Just found your channel with this video. I am 50 years old and my wife was 49. She passed away from cancer on June 24, 2024, so just over 2 months ago. My 18 yo daughter started college this month out of state, so she is out of the house now too. My younger daughter just turned 16, so it’s now the 2 of us in our home. It’s crazy how life just keeps moving, yet I still feel paralyzed from the grief of my wife’s passing. We were together for over 32 years, and our wedding anniversary is next week, which would have been 20 years. I imagine birthdays and anniversaries and holidays will be excruciating. 😢. Thank you for this video, and God bless you.
Hello Andy, Thank you so much for responding. Your comment is very heartbreaking, but very true in its speculations. Grief has , is and will be, a companion to you and your family, for a long long time to come. It's OK to be absent from your missing joys while you contemplate your life anew. This processing of the whole world crashing in on you is a normal occurance. Nothing is as it was, and will never be equally the same, again. Understanding why it hurts so bad is the easiest part of our grief. We loved our beloved wives (spouses), so darn much it is tearing us apart where it pains the most . In our heart. We have accumulated so many memories over the good and not so good years by each other's side. Thank God for those precious memories. Us, we, and ours were what gave us the strength to go ,do, be love and live. Now, its so different, as you certainly know. It can still get very lonely at times for me, especially at night. Even after 2 years. My prayer for you and yours is to find strength and peace with God, through Jesus Christ our savior walking in you and with you and even carrying you ,so be it necessary. GOD BLESS , My friend. . .
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my only son from brain cancer. I was devastated. I miss him so much. But, I remember that he is in my future. He loved the Lord and I know exactly where he is. Listening to anointed Christian music and reading my Bible encourages me and gives me comfort. One day we will see our loved ones again. May God bless you and comfort you. One day at a time. Sometimes it’s a minute at a time. 🙏🏼
It is so nice to hear your story Kikiann. The belief in a heaven with our loved ones is a hope to look forward too. Your son will greet you one day at the entrance to your new home. I think of my wife waiting for me there often. Thanks for your words of faith, others can read them also and be comforted in knowing they are not alone...may God bless...🕊
I’m Very Sorry “4” Your Lost: I’ve Lost My Husband Of 23 Years. It’s Been “5” Months & I’m Just So “BROKEN” I’m Just Going “2” Be “A” Roller Coaster For The Rest Of My Life. Because This Pain Really Hurts So Badly!
I found you, Len and you too, Jack as I was looking for others with the loss of the spouse. When I was 10, my dad died, and I did not handle it well. After 5 yrs. I realized that God Is in Heaven and I am on earth. Even if I wanted to punish God, I could not. What did I have that I was not given? Now, after nearly 49 yrs. of marriage, I recognize that I was gifted with those years too, there never was a guarantee. The best thing I can say, my dad taught me to read the Bible and my husband taught me to love the Word of God. I am blessed. Len, Jack, may we use this opportunity for Jesus!
Those words you say are so true and well said. It seems that you get it , and are on a path of healing, though the hurt will stay alongside us till that new beginning arises in our hearts. I thank you for your comments as many will see your inspirational spirit of truth in what you have said. We have an awesome God. He comforts us daily even when we dont ask for it. May He reign in us thru Jesus Christ ,our blessed saviour...amen...🕊
Len, thank you for your message. I am so sorry you are going through this pain. That tells me that your wife was blessed to have you. I lost my hubby of 30 years on Jan 5 2021, so almost 2 years ago. Like you, I don't have children or family, so not much support. We were always together and did everything together, and didn't really have close friends. We had each other. I miss him terribly. I still go through really bad days, but the dark waves are spaced a bit further apart now. I guess that is the price of loving someone. He was my reason, my everything. Now there doesn't seem to be much reason for anything. At 74 it's hard to start over. He died suddenly, so I never got to say good by, or tell him how very much he meant to me. So many regrets of things I should have said more often. Besides missing them and feeling so lonely without them, I think the regrets are the worst. Just going out and doing simple things is so difficult because we did everything together. Always feels like a big part of me is missing. I know God is holding me up and walking with me. Without that I don't think I would be here. I am leaning more and more on Him. He will never leave us or let us down. It helps to hear from you and others. Lets me feel less alone. Thank you, and I have subscribed to your channel.
Well hello, Jay P. ...thank you for your wonderful comment. Your coming up to another special date, if that is the right way to call it. 2 years, for you and 1 year for me on 2.26.23. I worry more about that day more than any I have already been through. It does scare me a little, I am not that strong to begin with. My dear wife was, how did she do it... her faith. I should have watched her closer , I was just to busy to notice just how strong her belief in God was. I believe in God and his gospel of salvation. But I didn't live it , she did. I expect this hurting to go on for some time. Most tell me that. I think they are right. I still hurt really bad sometimes. Like you I think. I have some friends in the grief groups I attend but only talk at meetings mostly. No friends that are close. You sound like me or my journey in so many ways. You can type a word or thought here anytime. There are many here who are much wiser or further into their journey who can help. They certainly have helped me....... We miss em , every day. One day we will hold them again in our arms tightly. What a day that will be. Until then we keep praying and believing. Have a blessed night and better day Jay P...🙏🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Thank you. Yes, that date will be hard for you. I know it is for me. This whole time of year is a reminder. We must think on how we will see them again one day. Thanks again.
(HUG) Your message was heartwarming to me, I too I miss my husb so much, we were together 55 yrs, did everything together, worked together, etc. He went through so much pain with lung & brain cancer, daily radiation and MRI, PET scans, cat scans, so much driving back and forth to all the many, many,, Dr appointments, I wish he never went through them, maybe he would have lived longer, they caused him so much pain and suffering. But I know he is without pain now, he is in the arms of Jesus, and we will be together soon God willing.
Len, I can relate to everything you shared on here. My grief is only 10 months old after losing my wife of 51 years. It's a hard journey, and i still cry every day at least once, but we have to carry on as best we can. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Hoping you get to feeling better eventually.
So sorry for your loss. My husband of 40 years passed over 6 months too. He was a wonderful man. My hope is to honor him in my actions now. Videos on grief help me a lot. So, thanks for sharing. I also find to be active but don’t carry a lot of responsibility helps. That widow fog can be real embarrassing. So hugs to you my friend.
Thanks for your comments, we share the pain with each other to help and to heal. 40 years is a long time to love, deep is the hurt that only we understand. May God bless you MsTinaDiane. 🕊
Awwh this is touching. I lost my husband 11mths ago to covid 19. We were together for 3 yrs and just got married for 1yr. Total of 4yrs. We had plans for a future. It's hard to know that even though it may seem as i am young and can start fresh. That is not so, i hurt. I miss the person that could have grown old with me. Love is beautiful.
Hello Amanda, you hurt because you love. I never knew love could hurt so bad, love is beautiful, God made it to be that way. But the deeper the love the greater the painful hurt. You never really even got a chance to grow in this beautiful union of love. But you have do have good memories to help you through this terrible hurting. I am praying for peace in your heart and soul. May GOD bless and comfort you in this terrible anguish. 🙏🕊
Oh my gosh I lost my spouse 6 months ago It would have been my anniversary on the 26th of this month You sound exactly like how I feel I understand the cry I lost my world he was 48 years old I lost him to a brain aneurysm I kissed him goodbye and went to work and that was the end ,my heart goes out to you and yes there is a Jesus And yes she is happy and yes we do cry for ourselves but what are we supposed to do but if we supposed to do it hurts it's undescribable I'm 52 years old I'm a widow I can feel your pain it's so awful I don't have any other words to explain it sorry this is probably too bold I gotta go to work Have a blessed day sir my prayers are with you
My heart goes out to you tess, we will make it thru this , we see them again , we will hold them in are arms once more. I believe this , I think you do to. We must wait awhile longer ,,, but not too long....may God bless you and rap His loving arms around you thru Jesus Christ our Lord and saviour.....🕊
Good early morning Len, I'm 66, retired, live alone and don't have family close by. Although I do have two cats, they help.. I've even tried dating a couple of times but wind up just dropping out of sight. I think they call it ghosting today. Not fair to those women so, I've sort of given up on filling the aching loneliness and that is okay for now. I need to repair my soul before I can share with a different special someone. I do have counseling when it becomes unbearable. Watching this specific video...made me realize I need to finish my grief process and rebuild a new purpose. That is what is missing: Purpose. I just don't give a....hoot. Other than food, water and sleep; I've been in pause mode for a long time now. Coming up on anniversary five since I found her and how she left in such an ugly way. I keep telling myself, I'm ready to move on but, apparently that is not the case. It's the willingness to rebuild that is difficult but, watching your pained face and hearing the cracks in your voice forced me to realize, I'm not out of the woods yet. I don't know our numbers nor, do I really wish to however, it is great to see your face. Not sure where you are these days in your emotional travels, better I hope and I hope the best for your future. The quiet house is astounding to me...I heard the loud screams of silence each day but, ignored it just moving about eating, sleeping and only going out to grocery shop. I hate to say it but, thank the Lord for Covid. That is not meant in a mean way, it just happened to coincide with the death of my wife, favorite aunt and mother. The wife in November 2019, favorite Aunt May 2020 and Mother October 2020. So, isolating myself from the world actually made sense versus the guilt I would have placed on myself for being weak had it not happened that way. I was, and am to a smaller degree, crushed beyond my comprehension. I cried all the time, screamed at my Father in the darkness of a cold night and sobbed my heart all over and around me. I would have been ashamed had I done that publicly. The few times when the tears spilled without warning in public, I tried to hide, turning or bowing my head and pretending to scratch an itch on my face. When at a gathering of peoples, I would just leave the house and go outside to hide my pain. I began to carry tissue whenever I went. It becomes more bearable as time moves on but still, I have times...every once in a Blue Moon nowadays. I still look for her out of the corner of my eye. Thank you. I commend you for using the Love that flows through your heart to share your journey so openly on a public level. Serving in the Marines didn't give me those kinds of guts. Through your words of Love, I find a Hope and know I can make it if I listen to my Faith. Thank you. Thank you for sharing your heart. I needed to hear your words and concern for us others out here looking for some form of solace from a world that says: "big boys don't cry." We do. Bless your life forward and I hope you find laughter once again in your life. I'm working on me. You've helped. Best regards, Don
Wow , So well said Don. Lots to unpack here. After 2years I'm starting to make some progress with this horrible grief journey. It will happen to some degree, given time. Time is not an enemy, it is a friend of grief. They work as a team. You already know this, I'm sure. God bless you for your well written response. Peace to you my friend ...💪🙏
Hello Len, so sorry for your loss. I lost my partner 11 years ago I was 37 she was 28, we had been together for seven years & not a day goes by when I don’t think of her , grief is a very long road without any shortcuts and just when you think you’re doing fine, you’ll have a moment, when you reflect on your time together, I would say it becomes a little bit more bearable as the years go bye. I wish you all the love in the world for your journey ahead things will eventually get a little easier. Glyn
Thanks for your comment Glyn. I'm sorry for your loss also, it is a difficult road to walk. I know I won't forget my years. Sometimes with tears. GOD BLESS,...
Thinking about the gratitude of having been with my husband, and the good times we had, where we started out in life before it all ended after 48 years five months ago, has helped me navigate. I miss him immensely, but so grateful to have known and loved him, and to have been a partner to a great guy. He will always be with me in my heart. My heart goes out to you and others who are mourning their loved ones.
Hello Judy, thank you , very well said. Thankful for the 48 years. You understand the blessing thru the pain. I don't like this pain, but I do like the great memories that caused it to hurt so bad. I wouldn't trade them for anything...the first months it was to hard to breath let alone think rationally. Now I get it, some at least. It still hurts though. GOD BLESS....
I understand when it’s said some died of a broken heart. The grief and pain I felt early on scared me at times. I thought it was chest pain and I guess in a way it is, it’s our heart hurting so badly. 27 mos for me now. This intense pain is better but I’m still grieving and so lonely missing my husband of 50 yrs. This second year loneliness and missing him has been worse. But I will keep moving forward. My goal is for him to smile down and be proud of me. Hugs to all of you on this unwanted journey
Hi Dolores , I've felt that pain you talk about, it is scary to think that this pain can actually take your own life. Losing a spouse is an open wounded bleeding heart. It needs time to repair the damage of losing part of it and maybe the best part. In my case. Hope for some joy for the season of joy. For all of us on griefs journey.
My husband died 1 1/2 y ago, I watched him choke to death on our dinner. The first year was unending crying. Some things that have helped me are Griefshare, a group of people sharing their pain and videos of people who have learned to grieve well, also I had hypnosis for trauma. Grieving is a journey and we have to choose thoughts that help us to be Thankful for the time We had. I pray God comforts you and gives you peace during this difficult holiday season.
Thank you Sissy Smith. I tried not to imagine that pitchure that has played many times in your mind, I have one too. Not quite like yours, but one that is hard to overcome. You have had a hard road , I know, this journey has many twists and turns, but the healing will come in time. It has begun for me, slowly but surely. I have a big heart but sometimes it feels small and lost in the grief I read of others. Thank you again for sharing this story with me and with many who will be helped by it. May God bless you and yours for this Christmas and beyond...🙏🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 I have really been helped by the friendships I made with others suffering loss. It was a revelation to me that hypnosis could help trauma but it really has. I want others to realize that it’s possible
Hello iris, 10 months for me on the 26 of Dec. You surely have so many great memories to be thankful for. I know it's hard, this month and this Feb 26 23 , are going to be hard for me also... I think...... I get it Iris..................... May God bring you peace this Christmas and beyond...🙏🕊
Like you, I lost my sweet bride of 30+ years. We first met in high school and married first year in high school. Thank you so much for sharing your story and your faith. I too have a channel Pam and I started about travel but after losing her I added grief videos. Maybe you will find some of mine helpful as I've found yours. Look for "Traveling with Jack and Pam". God bless you sir.
Thanks for your kind reply, means alot to me, your wife is very beautiful also. I can understand your grief, my cindy is even more beautiful now. We just have to wait for our time. It won't be very long, I believe...God is with us...
I’m glad I stumbled upon your journey. I’ve watched a few of your videos. This one is really heartwarming. I’m just making it to 6 months and I’m just starting to feel a tad bit more hope. I don’t have a large family either but thank you 🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing . I lost my husband of 22 years , my soulmate Aug. 2021. It does get a bit easier but around this time. Holiday time, it’s been difficult. My faith in Jesus has carried me thru each day and I know my beloved husband is in heaven and we will see each other again. It just gets difficult at times when we are going thru this journey of grief. Love and peace to all who are grieving
Thank you for this comment. Steph M-P , your faith in Jesus, so glad to hear this. My first Christmas without my best friend next to me. I'll get through it like all of us, but it hurts already. I don't like that hurt. I'm trusting too , in his loving hands to guide us all, through this holiday season and beyond. So many hurting....May God bless you , and yours...
My deepest sympathy Len! One day at a time and it does take time and everyone is different. My husband passed away over a year ago now and I still have difficult days.Im starting to move forward as I know that is what my husband would want me to do.
Corrine I'm alright I think and suddenly I'm not. Depressed today I lost my husband 5 months ago..suddenly no time to say goodbye just dropped down dead heart attack
I know the hurt as well because I also lost my wife and it was the roughest time of my life. You mentioned God and you you said the acceptance and that is the two most important words in your current walk. Believe in it more. God has a special place in his heart for widows and orphans so you are in his mercy. You probably wonder how can widowhood be a mercy of God if God could have intervene in the first place but accepting God's purpose is accepting. You see God has a purpose in everything. Your video just my be enough to save someone's life like you said. Keep walking, you are doing great. I became a competitive runner after my wife passed away, mostly from my time grieving. I just followed God's path and now I am enjoying his gift. Keep your eyes open and your ears listing he will guide you as you draw closer to him.
Thank you Tulio, I have heard many different things from many different people. Your comment rings so true to my heart. Almost as if you could see inside me. GOD sends a special word from some at the moment they need to hear it. I believe this is one of those. Sometimes it is just a simple few words that can make the difference in someone's life or course. May God continue to bless you...☝️
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in September 2022 and he was only 55yrs old and I'm 51yrs old and only daughter is 34yrs old. I sometimes feel like I'm loosing my mind, the pain is too deep only those who have gone what we are going through can say they understand because losing a spouse is the most painful. One day at the time, prayer helps me to communicate my feelings to God and after I do feel a relieve. Evenings are horrible for me because we were best friends and I miss him so much. To all those that are in this journey may you all find strength that you need for each day. God help us.
Thank you Dudu Nhlabathi, your journey is just beginning to grab hold of you tightly. The grief you now feel is so very real and new, in so many ways. each day can bring on a different level of pain mixed with indecision and doubt. Your life can be altered permanently by the now empty place in your soul. Your world and your daughters has become different now. The feelings you are experiencing, are felt by so many others , myself included. I'm very glad to hear that you have a faith in God. If I could tell you only one thing , it would be trust in Jesus to help you through this terrible journey. When I hurt , I just say Jesus help me. He never took the hurt away, but He has walked with me through it thus far...praying for both of you, God's light and peace rest on you...🙏🕊
I lost my beloved mother unexpectedly on October 6 2022 and I'm heartbroken 😢💔. She lived with me my entire life and I miss her so much everyday. Is extremely painful. I'm praying to God for strength and healing.
Hello Sunrise Schubert, your loss of your dear mother is something that hurts very very much. My mother was so kind and special to anyone she met. This is hard to go through. Loss of a mother is at the top of the list. The top is shared with many family, but moms are so special. I've lost nearly all I have ever loved next to my wife is my dear kindly mother. It to still hurts, non stop. God is listening to your heartfelt prayers. He may not take all the hurt, but He will help you bear it, that's a promise from Him. GOD be with you...🙏🕊
Thanks for sharing. My wife, 51yrs of a happy marriage, passed just over two months ago. She was my guiding light, and gave me purpose. We both sacrificed for each other and now the emptiness I feel is overwhelming. No children, so all I have are the memories of a great ride through life. It's a struggle...
I know very well about the struggling you speak of. No one told me what this was going to be like. She was my reason and purpose, like you said. You are just beginning your 3rd month of this journey. My 1st and 2nd months were probably the hardest on me. My 3rd and 4th were a beginning of reality. She was not coming back. As I moved into the next few months, I began to do things we used to do together. This was not easy at first, but slowly I began to live this new life alone. The lonely feelings are always there, but the faith in God she lived now lives in me. And that faith, had carried me thus far. May God bring you peace, fshafly2.
I fully understand everything you’re saying. Yes it’s very tough getting through every day. I tell myself to take each day in “baby steps”. I’ve also lost my confidence in doing many things alone. I send a text to my husband every night telling him what I’ve been doing and getting things off my chest in the hope he’ll read it. We were together for 50 years. It’s only 13 months since I lost him. Thanks to my lovely dog he’s what gets me up in the morning. Yes, it takes time and will get better but it’s not like taking meds to fix things completely.
Hello Moira, your comments are a reflection of many who share in this journey of hurt. I write in my journal about my feelings for that day and tell her all about it. I cry some while I'm writing. It brings me some comfort to lie in bed while I am writing. I look at her pillow and think of her smiling at me . I don't care what others may think, this is all I have. I trust in God to help me get thru each night and day. So far He has....🕊
Hi Jill, thank you for your comment. I'm glad your doing better, in time most of us will. I always said from the start, I would not wish this on anyone. I feel it has become better, but the one thing I struggle with is the loneliness. May take more time, I think..May God bless your new year....
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 After loosing my parents and two brothers, I thought I could emotionally handle anything. When I lost my hubby, it basically took the joy out of my life. Oddly enough, I'm glad he didn't have to go through this; I care about him too much; I'd rather bear this cross.
That's very very painful . It reminds me the last hour of Jesus; in that garden of Gethsemane how He felt alone. You are a strong Man. Keep your faith up, all is going to be all right. Love in Christ. Praying for you.
Thank you Carla, God has blessed me with comments like yours. I can't tell you how much a simple word of encouragement can bring a greatful smile to hurtful frown. GOD BLESS you...
Len, your thoughts are just like mine. You have helped me and I appreciate it so much. I don't have any family left either. I can't believe this is my life now; but I have to accept it.
Hello Jen. It is a road of so many twists and turns this grief journey . Being alone is not fun, not at all. I know. And so do you now. Thats why I do this. To give us a place to grieve ,with some one who gets it and can talk and pray with each other . The prayers are the best part of this. Yes, it will begin to sink into you slowly you will have to accept it. I fought it for months. And now, I do believe it though with a lonely torn feeling left behind. Many here have been where you are and can talk and pray. My prayer for you is for healing of your broken heart to begin. And the peace of God to guide you now thru this horrible pain in your grief. God has you in His thoughts. You are not alone not really. Many here to help. GOD bless you Jen....
I understand it well. I lost my wife in June this year after 26 years of her suffering with MS. I cared for her most of that time. We were married 51 years. We built two homes to accommodate her needs. I walk a lot as well. It helps. We had a son and daughter and they are both married and I have 4 grandsons who live fairly closeby, but I don't see much of them. In many ways I have been grieving many years. She was unable to stand or walk the last 15 years. Her passing was a great relief for her. She was very special. I will be ok. I'm not looking for anyone else. I am getting used to saying I and me instead of us and we.
HELLO RON, your story is a hard one to listen too. I don't know how to respond to your words here. I had to read and reread over to get a good mental picture of of it all. I can't. There is a lot there to understand. I'm not capable of going that deep. I just listen to your voice, and feel your pain and your relief, that she is not suffering anymore. I hope your son and daughter bring YOUR grand sons over much or maybe they come over on there own. There's joy there. Your last statement really hit me hard. Getting use to saying me or I, not we our us. That brought tears to my eyes, and again as I text here, so true so true. My heart goes out to you my friend, lm praying for you now, may God bless you and yours...
Thank you for sharing.
Grief is excruciating. I didn’t want to live. I just wanted to go to heaven to be with Jesus and my awesome man. Thank you for sharing. Jesus is awesome.
Hello Lydia
I certainly understand what you say here.
I sure do.
But , we both have a reason and purpose for being here at this time.
I believe.
Although I'm not certain what that will be or is yet.
Jesus, will be our new bride , who can understand it all.
Soon we will be there, before we know it....
It's gonna be good,
No, it's gonna be Amazing ....God bless...💪☝️🕊
That’s exactly how I felt after 48 years just wanted to go be with him and my Jesus!
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 that was beautiful thank you
@keeplookingup6354 thank you for sharing your feelings my friend.
I certainly get it.
God bless...☝️🕊♥️
My wife and I celebrated our 20th anniversary in Sept '23. On Jan 5, 2024 she said she was feeling a little tired. I tucked her into her favorite recliner with her new Christmas blanket, got her a glass of water, topped off a humidifier since she'd been fighting a cold and went into the other room to hang out with our 14 year old autistic son so that she could rest. A couple of hours later I went to take the dog out and noticed that her lips were white. She was gone, she was 52.
It's only been 13 days but it's been a very surreal 13 days. I've been ping ponging around those stages of grief that you hear about. The thing that was really tearing me up was doubt and anger. How did I fail to see that she was dying? Was I too wrapped up in my own head to notice that she needed me? How could she not tell me? Why didn't she call for an ambulance? The anger and guilt felt like a real blade slicing through my chest and gut.
Then the night before last I was given a gift that let me breathe again. Our son is semi verbal autistic. One of his obsessions is that he constantly films everything on his iPad and makes little movies with it. I've grumbled in the past that it feels like living with a narc, you never know when you're on camera. The night before last I was backing up electronics so that no pictures of Kim were lost when I started on his iPad. He had filmed me cooking his dinner, if you can call heating up a frozen pizza cooking. He had filmed me getting my wife all her meds, her water, her blanket, etc. I got to see her smiling and acting normally. He filmed me putting the cat in her lap and giving the dog a milk bone. All this was probably within 30 minutes of her passing. She was asking me to grab her various things and was thanking me for taking care of everything. She was happy. There were no red flags. She didn't know what was about to happen. There's no way that I could have known from the way she was acting. I wasn't a self absorbed a-hole, at least not in this situation.
I was able to let go of the guilt and anger. It felt like a warm hand of grace touched my heart and granted me some peace. I'll never complain about being on camera again. We have a very long way to go but I don't have to doubt or hate myself over not saving her. That's a tangible gift.
Hearing stories like yours helps. It gives me some perspective and a heads up on what's coming my way.
This comment just gripped me to my very core.. I am SO very sorry for what you are going through. I cannot even imagine that kind of scenario, but.. I do know something about SUDDEN and unexpected loss, and I have to say that there is nothing harder in this world. My husband was on the autism spectrum himself, as am I .. so I have a very soft spot for any family with an autistic member. I know this is so much to process right now for both you and your son. I definitely know about the doubts and anger and I am so sorry you are going through this. I beat myself up in the same ways, over and over again. How could I not even know my husband was so ill? How could I have prevented this? Could I have prevented it? But the truth is.. sometimes these things hit out of the blue, with no warning. Your wife may have just thought it was a cold that was no big deal. She may not have known it was serious either. Sometimes things like this come so suddenly that there is no warning. My heart goes out to you. I truly believe that autism is a gift. Having it myself, and with a husband who had it, I can see now how our extreme obsessions can sometimes be a gift from God that allows us to excel in a certain area for a reason. My husband did the same thing with filming things and making videos. I know your son is a gift, and I encourage you to praise his talents. He may very well turn out to be a movie maker one day - Steven Spielberg has autism and his creativity lead him to create some truly amazing movies! You just never know what your son may do one day. Encourage that. Support that. Tell him he is AMAZING and gifted. (I'm sure you already do... but I just love to encourage it.) I'm so glad that his videos helped you to have peace and to let go of the anger. By the way - you have an incredible gift for writing. You are talented in this area. Reading your words here is like reading a beautiful storybook, because of your writing style. Even through the sadness and the grief and the pain, you gave all of us here a gift with your eloquent words. You never know what you and your son might do together one day with such talents. God bless you... God bless you both.. and I pray that this channel and others may help you as you begin this journey.
@@WeepingWidowSueAna Thank you so much for your kind words. Luckily our son is doing better than expected with the situation. He's a strong young man. I think that he's probably doing better than I am. He has had people that worked with him 8 years ago in kindergarten show up to help him. It has been humbling how many people have showed up for our boy. So many of them loved my wife and love my son. Being active in the special needs community introduces you to some of the best people on the planet.
One small silver lining to this situation is seeing the kindness and light in others that we are usually too busy to notice. So many people have gone out of their way to share kindness and comfort with me and my son. The first 10 days until I saw the video that he made of his Mom were pretty rough. I couldn't sleep so I was up reading, researching and watching videos about loss. I saw several of your videos and they helped me as well. I never thought I'd willingly watch a video of someone else experiencing pain but when you are a fellow member of the club it relieves some of the loneliness and helps me prepare for some of the thoughts and emotions I'll be going through down the road. Thanks for your kindness and thank you for sharing your video's. They do help.
@@RobertJung-bj3fo I don't know how you've found the strength to deal with that for close to two years. The first 10 days until I found my sons video were the worst days of my life. I'm still getting those rogue waves of emotion that surprise you out of the blue. For the past few days every time the pain and anxiety rachet up I think back on the video and remember Kim smiling at me and thanking me for getting her tucked in for her nap. The medical examiner determined that she had some pneumonia in her right lung. Something that was easily treatable. She had told me earlier in the day that if she didn't shake the cough in a day or two she was going to call her doctor and get some antibiotics. Neither of us knew how bad it was. That's something that has gone through my head a lot the last two weeks, 'If I had only known...'. But we didn't know. If I dwell on that rabbit hole too much then I will end up in a very dark place.
My wife's birthday is St Patrick's day, just 4 days after our son's birthday and three weeks after mine, she would have been 53. Seeing all the Valentines Day displays all over the place isn't helping. I'm just trying to focus how to navigate birthdays, holidays, Mothers Day and all that for our son. I'm not the best equipped for handling all that. My wife was a cheerleader in every sense of the word. I used to tease her that it always looked like Santa and half his elves threw up all over our house. She would have several trees scattered around the house with different motifs. If one of us had a birthday the whole neighborhood knew from all the decorations. She'd break out face paints and crafts just for the fun of it. Always so positive and enthusiastic. Not sure how I can make these occasions nearly as fun for our son when I just don't have that talent and am half dead inside.
I keep reading how men need to find some kind of organized support network. Women seem to do better with loss since they are more fluent in the language of emotion. With a little arm twisting some of my wife's friends found an online grief group and talked me into signing up, there may have been some threats involved. One of her friends is a 'retired' biker chick from a 1% group so I paid attention to her well intentioned threats. So I get to start talking about all my emotions this monday. Oh boy, just what every guy wants to do, talk about their emotions. I was raised in an Army family, born on base and all that, so the extent of my emotional training as a child was 'I'll give you a reason to cry if you don't stop'.
I have a very long way to go, not looking forward to the trip but I'll do what I have to for the kid. My wife was a militant mama bear, if I don't do everything in my power to give our son a happy and normal life she's the type that would come back down and skin me with a rusty butter knife. That gives me an anchor and plots my course at least.
I hope you can find some peace.
@@npenick66 You are very welcome, and I am glad all of the various videos on loss are helping you. I agree with you - I certainly never expected to be watching videos on loss, but those first months, there was nothing else that comforted me except watching others go through the same pain. It makes you feel like someone out there understands. No one else around me understood at all, and I had very little support. I am so glad that you and your son have great people around you, supporting you and reaching out. That makes a world of difference. The special needs community is indeed one of the best there is. So much love and support and that is so needed. I am glad that Len's videos are a comfort to you. Watching his videos and others are what held my head above water the first months. God bless you, and thank you for the kind response.
What a remarkable gift ❤
Sad story. I know how you feel. My wife passed away 14 months ago (Sept 23). Cried hard for many months. Still do now and then when I hear a song or think of thinks we did. I miss her terribly. You do start living a normal life again, but there is always someone missing and whatever you do is never the same. Keep the good memories alive.
My wife passed last June, but she never left. She will be with me forever, and that's a blessing... I'm a lucky man to have her in my life and I'm grateful... Not many people are that lucky...
Me too, forever in my heart is my late wife of 43 years in love.
(HUG)God bless you. Jesus is my first love, It's been 2 weeks since I lost the love of my life on earth, he has been with me 55 years, took care of me, loved me, we worked together he was always by my side helping me, always. I know as the song goes by "Casting Crowns" The only scars in heaven are on the Hands that hold you now, Lord Jesus help me get through this grief. I too want to stay home in the house we shared together, going out is so difficult, paying all the bills etc. that he took care of, and trying to save my house, I too go for daily walks thanking God for him and asking Him to help me to get through this trauma, I know we all must face adversity, but Jesus is with us in everything we face in life helping us to get through it. I pray for you in your loss, of Cindy pray for me in my loss of Bruce in Jesus Name, Amen, so be it.
🙏✝️♥️🕊
God sends us lessons to learn, and many of them send us into depression and emotional turmoil. However, he does not expect us to spend the rest of our life living that pain over and over. He wants us to learn a lesson from it and move on from it. My husband just passed away August 4, 2024. We were together 27 years. I cannot allow myself to fall into depression and give up on everything I’ve worked towards my whole life. My husband has God with him now I can stop worrying about him and start worrying about myself. It’s the best gift I can give God and my husband is to live my best life. I pray that everyone on this channel realizes God wants you to be happy and so does your partner.
Thank you Deborah
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s been 5.5 months for me and it does not get any easier. 😢 He had been in my life for 16 years. Every single day I cry because there is nothing I can do to bring him back.
I just lost my husband of 59 years 3 months ago and have known him since we were kids. I can hardly breath and the grief is unbearable. My kids aren't around and it's just me now. We didn't have a support network so it's difficult to be alone. I have trouble now just getting out. I have an illness where I am learning to walk again, he was my caretaker and now he's gone. It's really difficult but we have to keep faith and be grateful for the day and let the tears fall when and where they may. It will get better, trying to find the wisdom in my grief not just endure it. Blessings, God does watch over us and so do our loved ones.
Hi my name is Rob I lost my wife on this day 2/22/22/ it's has bin a very difficult road my God was it! I thought I was going crazy and I probably was. it was so Hard I still sleeping with her Robe every night right next to me it gives me something of comfort I know she is around it's the only thing I no that helps me we will be with are soul mate again and what a Happy day or night that will be to really see her again but I just really pray that she will be the same there as she was here and I can still love her like the way I did here and I pray that Heaven is kinda like her in alot of ways and Heaven is not like a perfect place and she is different I love the way she was here Amy was not perfect in any way that is why I loved her the way I did..and she loved me for the way I was I was losing my hair but she didn't care it was the way how she loved me that mattered not the way I looked..if I can't be with Amy like she was here and she is really different on the other side like Different!!! My Heaven to me would be like she was here living together growing together eating together working together..I miss her everyday and it's not like I miss her just when I think of her it's all the time..I remember saying to my sister when this happened to us I told here my sister! I know what God does he or she? Truly try to make you forget the grief that you have now that's the love pouring out of you and in time you will not feel as bad as u do right now you will never forget him but that pain u have now will slowly go away I no it's hard to understand that now..and I am not saying it's good but u will lose something that I am trying to hold on to and thats my grief because it's the only thing that keeps us still together if that makes any sense it's like u become different in a way because u will have no choice so if I am changing in a way will Amy change alot in Heaven will I still know her will she feel the same love for me there or will her love be like a mom's love or a Dads..that's what keeps me up some times at night..you take care of yourself and remember your husband is always around you u might not see him but he is there just like Amy is aways with me..be true to God and talk to God he can here you and your Husband also can...that's why I keep on talking to her every day in my mind or out loud I even hold he hand when I wake through parking lots going in to a store I put my hand out like I aways did don't it make me feel better yes it does..and if just that little thing makes me feel better than that's ok!! ROB
@@RobertJung-bj3fo Thats a sweet tribute to Amy. Love is a double edged sword. One side is love which is sharp and helps us through life, the other is loss, which is sharp and painful. Loss is a part of life. A painful part which happens to either the wife or the husband at some point. Sounds like you were blessed to have a beautiful relationship with her. God bless you.
Understand completely what youre going through. Its going on 4 yrs for me and l can’t say its much better now except l don’t cry all the time. Functioning and existing is not the same as living but no one can understand it that hasn’t gone through it. The best way to describe it is there’s a big hole in the atmosphere that follows me around everywhere and it never fills up or goes away. Physical challenges add to the experience. So sorry to hear you have this to deal with on top of grief. I am also having difficulties walking and getting around from old injuries and can certainly sympathize with the physical pain added to the emotional.
My relationship with Jesus has enabled me to endure, but after all the advice, books, videos, suggestions and attempts to overcome grief, lve stopped trying to do that anymore. I go to church because the bible says to go even so much more as we see the day of the Lord approaching, which is obvious nowadays. I read the bible because its all that really matters in the end. I pray because the Lord hears me and it doesn’t make Him uncomfortable for me to cry or be sad. I rejoice in the Lord because He is the most important thing in life, He is life. So all l can say about losing my love is that all focus has turned to Christ, to prayer, to whatever He wants me to do or say or go. Actually, nothing else matters. Perhaps that’s the purpose of loss for believers; to cut us loose from all earthly ties. Its not that l don’t love my other family. I go see my mom in the Alzheimer’s unit, l visit with my sister and keep grandkids sometimes and talk to my son and daughters. They are all wonderful. But the loss is always there. Lost the big diamond out of my wedding ring a few months ago. That broke my heart. Its in the jewelry box now but l had never stopped wearing it before then. Never think about ever having anyone else in my life. That’s actually a sickening thought, so this is it. Im here with Jesus, my Maker is my husband and we’re making it work. Anyway, just know that you’re walking a path that many ppl are walking and God keeps count of our tears, the Bible says. Prayers and blessings on you my sister in Christ. He is our comforter. 🌻🙏
❤❤❤❤
I lost my loving husband of 57 years, 24 months ago. I cry everyday and miss him so much. The pain in my heart gets worse every day. I don’t believe will go away. 😢😢
Hello Rita,
I'm so sorry for the great loss you are now experiencing in your body soul and spirit .
57 years is all of your lifes joys and pains stamped into your heart.
You can never describe the anguish you carry constantly in words , to anyone but those who have been through this terrible journey of griefs effects on the person you have now become.
Separated from the Love in the physical, yet your memories of the best part of lifes experiences will relive in your mind for months and years.
I thank God for those memories both good and not so good, all a part of who we were ,together.
I can say with some certainty, that the pain of your trauma, will lessen in time.
But time will tell, we all heal differently and at are own pace.
Many have said to me and others that grief is our love , with no place to go.
I believe it.
My prayer to you is for God's peace and strength to carry you thru your grief journey each day and each night.
God bless my friend....🙏🕊♥️💪
Thanks for your courage in putting yourself out there, Len.
I lost Debi three months ago. She was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer in January 2019. Median life expectancy for diagnosis is measured in months, I had her for four years. Mostly asymptomatic. What a gift! But after multiple surgeries, chemo, radiology, immunotherapy and participating in two clinical trials, even with the best medical care available, her immune system finally couldn't keep up. The weakness made her vulnerable to pneumonia and I lost her physical presence. After 25 years of living in own two person universe, I'm now left unsupervised. But not alone. Because she has never left me, she lives in my heart. As close to me as my breath. I miss her fiercely and my grief is profound. I expect to always have it. I won't try to get rid of it, but if the shock and pain recedes some, I would be grateful. But if facing waves of grief for the rest of my life is the price I pay to keep our love alive, bring it.
Yes, I am a widow and I know you are a widower and the grief is the same as people just think the after two weeks you automatically should be fine another person but that’s not how it works because when God calls your soulmate home, have you gone have the person you used to be because you used to be a teamand half of it is gone and people don’t understand that
Unfortunately i know how you feel. My wife of 40 years passed to the other side the day before thanksgiving in 2022. Im not sure if it gets easier, im not sure of anything anymore. Maybe ive become used to it, people say you have to move forward. What does that even mean, just going through the motions of everyday life can be a real task. I want my life back but shes gone forever. No matter what anybody says about, youre not alone. I walk this path by myself.
@@mikesmalley8854 I feel like that. I want my life back.
I lost my wife in 2022 nafter a 222 years battle with Parkinson's , I am in mourning for her everyday ,it does not get easier when we are left alone ,I did get help from grief consuling for awhile but I think men have a lot harder time alone in life espeaciallly when as were childless.I am lucky to have relatives to care for me ,but also know widowers with no family and
there are few short fixes but if grief is overwhelming at the cost of ones own health get professional care asap.
Just came across your video--- this is 2024-- it has been almost 2 years since I lost Paul. Yes- we were married 68 years!! I know!!! A life time!!! No words can ever say!! No way to tell!! Blessings
Thank you for sharing. I lost my lovely wife, Darla, on December 21, 2023. She was diagnosed with stage 4 gallbladder cancer on April 27, 2023. She fought through two different kinds of chemo, but the cancer was unrelenting. She passed away at home with me, my daughter and her daughter by her side, holding her hands. She was 55 years young. We were only together 6 years, married for 4 years. The deep, deep love we shared is certainly commensurate with the pain I am feeling right now. I just started back to work 2 days ago. It helps with giving me something else to think about, but I have had a few moments of heavy grief while at work. I'll keep keeping on and work through this, it's what she would have wanted. Take care of yourself.
It has been just over a month. We were together close to ten years, but what a ride it was. We fought cancer together two years and she eventually passed. Yeah, this grief is a wild ride. I hope you are doing better.
As a widow, I can relate ❤️🩹
I discovered your channel only now, Len. Thank you for your heartfelt videos. I lost my wife of 23 years in July, 2021. After more than 2 years, it is beginning to get a little better. However, I still do not derive any joy in life and I barely talk to anyone. For most part, I avoid people since I cannot relate to people who are not intensely grieving. Not sure whether that would ever change. I felt a kinship with you when I watched your videos. Thank you!
I understand, I lost my wife Nov. of 21. It is so very hard and smiles are still few. But I like Len believe I will be with my wife again, and with my Lord Jesus. Keeps me moving forward slowly. Wishing you Peace and Comfort.
I feel for your loss Len I lost my wife of 34 years on August 19, 2022 also 😢😢 the grieving is a long road I am with you my friend😅😅
Thank you for commenting bert,
You and I are close in our length of time in marriage and grief.
It is always good to hear from anyone that is walking the same road.
Somehow it helps lessen the hurting.
God bless my friend...
I know the pain of a broken heart and what you are going through. So sorry for your loss of your loving wife. I lost my precious husband RAY 20months ago. He was and still is the love of my life. 💔I cry for him everyday. How l miss him. He was the best thing that ever happened to me and was my everything, my soulmate, my world and my reason for living. Thankyou for sharing this video. You are not alone my friend.... Grief is the price of love... And we truly loved them❤They will be forever in our broken hearts😢💔🙏
Married almost 36 yrs,she died almost 4 yrs now,but I still cry,miss her so much,very hard for me
Jesus lives in my heart my dearest darling husband died last year Nov 2021 like u iv often felt like I wanted to die to be with him but like u I'm slowly starting to feel slightly able to cope yeah NEW life that u do not want my precious husband is with Jesus my beautiful mum went to be with her Saviour Jesus last year too they are waiting for me to join them I can hardly wait
Thank you Tracy. Your comment is a great one to read. Jesus offers hope. Thank God He gave us this new hope. I too can't wait either, But we have to wait our appointed time. I have to ask God for patience everyday, after telling him I'm ready to go today. It may not be a long wait , we just don't know for sure. May God bring you a blessed new Year, and beyond. 🙏🕊
I “accidentally” came up on this on my Utube. I’m so very sorry for your loss and deep grief. My husband passed a year ago. He wasn’t a believer but I was given the gift to tell him how much our Lord loved him just before he passed. I really believe I was the right person at the right time and he passed peacefully. I miss him greatly and always will. We were married almost 34 years. I’m now in the process of moving on to whatever God has for me. Not putting a blanket on the holes, but filling them with other things. I hope you are doing much better now. Thank you for being transparent in sharing of your grief. God Bless
I lost my wife two months ago after 40 years of marriage. You have described exactly how I am feeling now and your life situation mirrors my own, except I have children who are a great comfort for me. Thank you for this video Let's keep praying for each other.
I lost my incredible wife of 33 years completely unexpectedly, just 2 months ago yesterday. The pain is unbelievable - I could never have imagined such a thing. I've lost my parents, but I was not prepared for this. She is with Jesus, of that I am certain. That is the knowledge that keeps me plugging along down this bumpy road. I'm thankful I found your channel Len. I understand a year has passed for you as I write this, but you'll be in my prayers.
Im so Sorry for the loss of your dear beloved wife my friend.
33 years together is long time to bond and make those very special memories, which you will need now.
Yes , I made it this far. 2years plus,
God only knows how.
It is a heartache like no other, and rightly so.
Godly Marriage by definition is a union of heart soul and mind.
When that is broken ,deep pain and loneliness become your friend.
Grief is it's name.
This is so hard sometimes to accept, but it will only be temporal.
Healing will begin in time followed by a deep understanding of God's sovereignty and His perfect Love found only in our relationship with Him through Jesus Christ our savior our Lord and our God.
All things I thought I knew before, I really know them now.
Prayers tonight for you my friend for peace and guidance...
In , Jesus name, amen
@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Thank you Len, for your prayers, thoughts and words of wisdom and encouragement. This experience has absolutely vectored my attention onto Jesus and what He has planned for my life from this point forward. God bless you sir.
I’m so sorry for your loss, I know you hurt, I lost my son a while ago,don’t know if it’s the same, I understand how you feel
"Blessed are they they mourn, for they shall be comforted." Thank you for sharing your journey with such simplicity and humility. Lost my spouse two years ago.
Hi Lisa , thank you for reminding me of those blessed words of our Lord. I really haven't read those words of Jesus since my wife went home. That was a gift, thanks ...needed that...
I lost my wife of 44 years 4/22/19. I am like you, I have no children and no brothers or sisters like you. Every ones life goes on and they have their own problems. My wife was lucky to not see what the world turned into since 2020. I will be happy to leave this world there is nothing here for me.
Hello Charlie, you are right, this world has begun to decline in many areas in many ways. I feel a change is coming, though I don't know when. I'm sorry for your loss, you are like me in many ways, and feelings......I can feel so alone in a crowd even friends the few that still live. Most have a spouse to share in this life yet. It's so different for us. There is only my faith that has kept me going, and prayers from many who know just how I feel. Keep in touch Charlie ok, I'll be praying for you. May God bring you peace this very day...
Len my wife fought 3 different cancers over 9 years, the last one being pancreatic cancer. I hope god was merciful and your wife didnt suffer 9 years. Life is hard from the minute we are born till we die, after 73 years i still havent found the meaning of life but pain and suffering.
@@charliehargrave7458 hello Charlie, it is hard to except this fact we are born, then dying every day after wards. It is a mystery why God allows this. There were many times I wanted to stop believing in him. I haven't seen the horrors of death up close, or felt the excruciating pain of some disease or cancers that are unchartable on the pain scale. There is so much I do not understand about all this suffering. But one thing I do know is my wife had 3 different types of cancer also, and each one she believed God would heal her. I believed her. I wanted to believe God, I tried to believe God, but I trusted her feelings over God's. And he did heal her in the end. She believed that was all I needed to believe. Talking about a God who you don't trust in our believe in any more is not easy to do. I was so angry so very angry at God for letting here survive cancers and then get covid and then lose the battle the cancer began. Did he not know how much I loved her didn't he care how much pain he was dumping on me........ I thought he was a loving God. What just happened........my faith was never really that strong, almost non existent at that time... but now thru the prayers of others, the crying to God on my knees begging for answers, I have slowly understood his nature, the who, He is. I don't know what your true feelings are , but the God of the universe is real I have seen his hands work, heard his voice in written words and felt his love in my tears. Who can understand this all. He loves you and he certainly loves your dear wife. We can talk more about this if you want, I have a video about the angels that visited my wife before she died. This is all I can give you right now, my heart goes out you, please keep in touch, ok...
I’m sorry for your loss. It’s very hard. I lost my husband last month too after 31 years. Your voice is important to those grieving. Thank you for posting because I know I’m searching every day for people who understand. Your cat is beautiful. ❤
Thank you for your comments jennifer. I can only say this is the most pain I have ever felt in my entire life. The hurt is still there, I cried pretty good this beautiful sunday morning just walking in our yard kicking around a few fall leaves. You are not alone. Only we who hold our precious memories of our so dearly missed loved ones in our hearts, can appreciate how important it is to hear from others, (and there are many, ) who share in this incomprehensible journey. I will add you to my prayer list ,if that's ok.... may God bless you....
ditto 😢
Hug.. been a widow for five years now very tough thank you for taking me through greifing
"Hang in there and keep trying"...so true, it's all you can do. So sorry for your loss. It's just over a year for me and that first year was so very, very dark.
Gradually you learn how to live with it and start living again. I also found a lot of healing by getting out walking, being in nature.
Thank you for your post. It helps to know we aren't alone in our feelings.
Your welcome Sharon,thank you for commenting...keep walking...
I am 50 years old and lost my lovely wife of 18 years quickly on January 27th 2023. People ask me how are you doing and my response is it doesn't feel real. And they look at me weird. Am I crazy or do understand what I mean? I have had some really awful days and I have days with bad thoughts (that's all I will say or admit). I do not know how to move forward without my wife. Am I going crazy when I say it does not feel real? God bless you and your family. God bless Texas!
@tonystone3890 Our condolences, We pray for you, God bless you.
You are doing really well , walking , exercising and mostly God is the right medication. I just lost my husband of 48 years so I understand the crying you described. Praying for all of you going through this--God Bless you all.
I feel your sadness, i lost my husband last month and i know how it feels. I also felt the wanting to die to be with him because this sadness is unbearable. What i do is whenever i know that the feeling of wanting to cry is coming to hit me i distract myself. Go out to forget. Leave the tv on all night so i can sleep because i dont have anyone to talk. Sorry for your loss. And hugs to you.
Only us who go through this can understand this journey.
Thank you for your comment lea, I can say with some degree of certainty I know how you feel. This hurt is here to stay, but it will ease a little ,in time. May God bless you with peace...
Lea, I know how you feel! I have on the computer much more to hear voices and get input from others. I too had to choose to keep on living, it would have been so easy to follow. I can't go out much because of money but the home has so much of him, it's easy to stay. My sleep is not regular, but I walk the dog daily and I'm starting to try to eat better foods. Journaling has helped indeed. Hugs to you too. Jane
@@akfinn5308 the other day i got hit again with sadness. Been crying again. I just don’t know how to stop my yearning. There days im ok but no days that i did not think of my husband. I want to go out but nowhere to go. Some of my friends are busy. He died in our bedroom 3 weeks after we moved in our new house. The hard part is my sister and some friends thought that our grieving is easy to deal that our brain is easy to train. Mu sleep is not regular too. Since he passed i always wake up between 3-3:30am. So hard to live everyday without him.😔🥲
@@leasanksen2500 My heart goes out to you so much. It's so hard. Most days I have no idea what to even do with myself. I just wander around like a lost kitten in a huge scary forest not knowing what to do or which way to go. Hugs.
Your words are so true Lea, Iam by myself so i do understand. God Bless
Thank you for sharing your experience. We were married for 45 years, and I lost her right before Christmas 2023. It's hard for sure but it does get a little better over time.
Hello Rick.
I'm sorry my friend ,
Losing your dear wife is a hurt beyond measure.
I know that first year was a ruff ride .
My 2nd was easier in someways but new emotional burdens appeared.
The finality of it became more real and took me down the last few steps to the bottom.
I thank God for prayers from others and the pleading to God from my own anguished soul .
I survived those long days and longer nights with God's help.
I had nothing left.
I hope and pray for God to give you the strength and peace only He can provide.
It will make the difference.
God bless.....
You seem like a kind, wonderful man. I will pray for you, Len. I've been a widow for 8 years. I'm 75 and still working - that helps. I try to keep busy. I'll pray for you! God Bless!
I lost my beloved wife 1 month ago after 35 years of marriage the damn pancreatic cancer took her away from me it is the most painful feeling ever I only implore to the almighty Lord to give me the strength and courage to survive this pain 😢
God will sustain you my friend .
You will walk through a field of thorns, but roses will appear now and then if only briefly.
Time is the adaption, tears are the healing.
Love will never die.
Take care my friend..
God bless
I know what you're going through. I lost my wonderful husband almost two months ago (we have been together for 26 years) and it's been agony. I feel like I'm getting on better than I was in the beginning and just when I think I'm getting a handle on it, I'm right back to crying my eyes out. It's very hard indeed. I never understood why anyone would contemplate taking their own life after a loss like that, but now I get it, not that I will do that myself, but I totally understand why now. I appreciate your honesty in this video and I'm very sorry for the loss of your wife. Very sorry.
Good for you to have the courage to endure this process, and share with others. You help others as you share your story, and it helps you heal as well. You are brave and courageous as you try to find this reality. You will make it, just not quickly or easily. I know you must have been a great husband.
One thing that has helped me greatly to take me to my next level is not only accepting my wife is gone is the fact that nobody cares about my problems.
Yes it hurts deeply when everyone disappears bit they have their own problems and they just don’t care about yours.
It will make you a more caring person yourself because you know how it feels so you will become much more empathetic to everyone.
It has really helped me to start plowing a new path in my life as I try to re discover myself.
I plowed a lath for us when we met and now thats shes gone I have to pull the old plow back out of the shed and do it all over again.
At least this time I’m smarter and wiser and know how to deal with the rocks and roots better than I did the first time around.
Very well said ,
I can certainly identify...God bless
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118
Same to you Sir.
Thank you for your sharing, I had lost my wife of 31 years, at the end of May. Like you we had no children, her sisters, and brother have families and my only brother also has two children. With the holidays beginning next week will be a rough going, I'll just say that I live "one day at a time". Even less than that sometimes. Len, I'm on my journey thru grief also. And despite what ANYONE says, it ok to cry, we're going to cry, we're supposed to cry, IT IS OK FOR MEN TO CRY. Anyone, who says otherwise, ignore them. If possible. My prayer to you, is that you, I, and others who lost there loved one(s), enjoy the rest of our lives and that when our turn comes, we may be with them. 🙏 PEACE BE WITH YOU!
Thank you for your comment rjprack, tears have been my friend for awhile now. I do have days where they are few and far between. Time has been one fact the experts have gotten right. It is time, and God's grace that has brought me through this grief thus far. My mornings and nights can still be rough, but staying busy with things during the day helps me get past another lonely day. My wife is waiting for me in heaven, and that is a big motivation to keep going in God's will, for me here. You must go thru these holidays just like me, hope you can share with your family. God's peace to you my friend...
Yes, people that lose a spouse a year to three years down the road they meet in Mary again they did not meet their truth so when you meet your true soulmate, there is no one else out there for you. You don’t know won’t no one else because you found the love of your life, and there’s nobody that can measure up to him or her so you live your life alone and I’m one of those people that met my true soulmate and met my soulmate. I don’t want nobody else. I don’t need nobody else because I found the ultimate love in my husband, and probably the ultimate love in your life. I feel for you, brother. I’m praying for you and please pray for me in the name of Jesus Christ. I pray amen.
I also lost my wife in july of this year. We were together for 41 years. It’s a tough road buddy I get it. I’m also in Michigan. I’m alone as well. No kids either.
Thanks for speaking up and out. This is hard no matter what the length of time together. Time has been passing quickly, this has been a good thing. You hang in there too. GOD bless. Snow tonight....
It’s been 5 months now and I still cry every day.
@@BettyGrin praying for you lost my soulmate 11 years ago ago 11/10/13 still miss him
loss my wife of 62.5 years and my grieving still goes on after 2.5 years, it is starting to be a little easier but the tears still flow.its not easy, in my case i have children and that is what keeps me going.God bless you.
Thank you sir, God bless...
What a precious video! God bless you.
I lost my wife to weeks ago and it hurt bad married 39 years I am with you bro love you god bless you and are wife's
@@larrykouts7189 praying for you! God will take you through the heart ache!
I was very fortunate because I have a good friend who unfortunately had already gone through this and she walked me right through and told me all my weird feelings were normal. She kept promising me I would smile again and told me to hang on for that year of firsts. I think she was afraid I would harm myself. My husband passed very suddenly, no warning and I thought I would die. I have survived though and I do smile now and I think he would be very proud of me.
Thank you for commenting Sandra.
What a blessing to have such a friend.
A friend like that is never wished for but given in our time of need.
God bless my friend...♥️🙏☝️🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Yes, I am so thankful for my friend. She helped me and I have tried to help others who are going through it now. As a matter of fact, I just ran into an old friend who lost his wife three years ago. He asked me if it gets easier or if you just get used to it. I think as time goes by it is just easier to handle. I can now laugh and tell funny stories and look at pictures and I do fine. :)
You're very strong and courageous man thank you for talking about Jesus Christ thank you
You are very welcome, Jesus Christ is the only hope for us all.
Amen you said it brother or you know your loved one is in heaven and you are crying and morning Your loss and your loss is very important that most people don’t understand. Thank you for bringing this to the forefront. Yes time goes on and yes we move forward but there’s still that stopping place that God called him home that we used to be a couple and you have to move on, it is so hard my soul mate almost 11 years ago and I can’t cannot still carry on without him. I am stuck in my heart, but I know time goes on and they say carry care of everything but no it does nothing.
❤
I feel for your sir I lost my husband a year a go there's not one day that I don't cry my heart is broken 💔 I reach out to Jesus everyday
Amen. KATHY. THANKS...
I am sitting in hospice as I type this. I fear the next few weeks. My gf of 14 years is dying of cancer, I don’t know how I am going to deal with this.
Faith is such a gift - so thankful you know Jesus. Keep up on life.
Thank you so much.🙏🕊
Love you Brother, I feel your pain
Thank you my friend...
I did a search and found your channel on UA-cam. I lost my wife for 34 years five months ago. After a 2 1/2 year long illness. I am experiencing everything that you describe. At age 65 I find myself all alone in the world. This frightens me more than anything. Research tells me that the second and third year could be even worse. I pray that they’re wrong. Thank you for your video. It helps to hear others going through what you were going through.
Im in the same boat Brother, almost identical story except Im 53 and we were friends since 14 and started dating at 17 in 11th grade.
What a beautiful woman in every way.
This video really helped to encourage me through this.
Its been one month since she passed.
She encouraged me to remarry because she wanted me to be happy.
She told me to be patient and Ill find someone special.
God bless, my friend
Thank you for your blessings. Taking it one day at a time.
Thank you len
Thank you, sir.
That was sorely needed.
The Lord Jesus lives in my heart too.
He is on the Throne. He is Sovereign.
His ways are not our ways;
His thoughts, are not our thoughts.
He has miraculously sustained me during my darkest days.
Private and intimate times with the Lord, talking/crying to Him and reading His precious Word, have comforted my broken heart.
His Spirit, living in me, is stronger than my grieving flesh.
I am in the Hand of the Great, I AM.
(Australia)
Hello Carol Mitchell. Your wonderful words here have lifted, and will continue to lift many more out of a valley of darkness, if only for a moment. This grief has a purpose, and it will continue to reach out to hold you tightly in it grasp. I have learned that my only way to deal with the symptoms of these terrible wounds is to lay them at the cross. It sounds to simple, but it really is. " You shall seek me and you shall find me, when you search for me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29: 13. I believe this. My road was very dark and lonely in the begining of this journey. Keeping my focus on heaven, my future home has helped me progress each week or even day. I can imagine you there maybe on bended knees, like me, pouring everything I had to give unto His throne of mercy. I still need His mercy,his new mercy every day. The love of God sustains us. He loves everyone, but he hates sin. I'm just a worthless sinner saved by the grace of God. I thank my beautiful wife for reminding me of God's love for us all. Your words are inspiring. Thank you so much....🙏🕊 May God bless you and yours ...☝️
Hay we miss u
Sir, my heart goes out to you. I too, am a recent widower of 25 years to my beloved wife. She died in my arms suddenly it’s been four months since I am posting this to you. I tried to find things and ways to occupy my time. My marriage to her was structured, but a lot of fun and good times. I had my set routines with her and right now, I try to think of things to fill that void, blessings to you, sir.
Thank you for commenting.
My heart has been where yours is ,and it doesn't want to go back.
I know the pain of those early days all to well.
God keep you close to His side as you journey through this terrible hurting grief.
Take care my friend....
Your words touch my heart. My husband of 30 years passed 88 days ago and also was a Christian. My faith sustains me, but this walk is hard. Thank you for sharing this. You’ve helped me today. Trusting it will get easier for us both.
Thank you for your comment O&M, 88 days , you are still in a very hard place . The faith in our LORD GOD, is the most important part of these Rollercoaster rides our grief takes us on. Jesus won't stop the ride, in most instances, but He will surely ride with us. I have had pain and sorrow that can't be measured by any scale the experts have provide thus far. The price of Love is a price we can only pay with our bereavements displays. Our tears are not lost, God keeps them in a bottle . How precious and Loving is this awesome God we believe in. Time does and will bring some healing. One day, maybe soon, we can once again hold our beloved in are longing reaching arms. It will happen...May God bring peace and joy this holiday season to you and yours. HOPE is still alive....
My husband and I were married 54 years. Thank you for talking about grief, and including faith.
Just found your channel with this video. I am 50 years old and my wife was 49. She passed away from cancer on June 24, 2024, so just over 2 months ago. My 18 yo daughter started college this month out of state, so she is out of the house now too. My younger daughter just turned 16, so it’s now the 2 of us in our home. It’s crazy how life just keeps moving, yet I still feel paralyzed from the grief of my wife’s passing. We were together for over 32 years, and our wedding anniversary is next week, which would have been 20 years. I imagine birthdays and anniversaries and holidays will be excruciating. 😢. Thank you for this video, and God bless you.
Hello Andy,
Thank you so much for responding.
Your comment is very heartbreaking, but very true in its speculations.
Grief has , is and will be, a companion to you and your family, for a long long time to come.
It's OK to be absent from your missing joys while you contemplate your life anew.
This processing of the whole world crashing in on you is a normal occurance.
Nothing is as it was, and will never be equally the same, again.
Understanding why it hurts so bad
is the easiest part of our grief.
We loved our beloved wives (spouses), so darn much it is tearing us apart where it pains the most .
In our heart.
We have accumulated so many memories over the good and not so good years by each other's side. Thank God for those precious memories.
Us, we, and ours were what gave us the strength to go ,do, be love and live.
Now, its so different, as you certainly know.
It can still get very lonely at times for me, especially at night.
Even after 2 years.
My prayer for you and yours is to find strength and peace with God, through Jesus Christ our savior walking in you and with you and even carrying you ,so be it necessary.
GOD BLESS ,
My friend. . .
My heart goes out to you. Your note bought tears to my eyes.
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my only son from brain cancer. I was devastated. I miss him so much. But, I remember that he is in my future. He loved the Lord and I know exactly where he is. Listening to anointed Christian music and reading my Bible encourages me and gives me comfort. One day we will see our loved ones again. May God bless you and comfort you. One day at a time. Sometimes it’s a minute at a time. 🙏🏼
It is so nice to hear your story Kikiann. The belief in a heaven with our loved ones is a hope to look forward too. Your son will greet you one day at the entrance to your new home. I think of my wife waiting for me there often. Thanks for your words of faith, others can read them also and be comforted in knowing they are not alone...may God bless...🕊
Blessings for healing go out to you from me.
I can not imagine grieving the loss of a child above all
❤
@@barbarachakraburtty8246 thank you for your comment BARBARA , blessing back to you too..
I’m Very Sorry “4” Your Lost: I’ve Lost My Husband Of 23 Years. It’s Been “5” Months & I’m Just So “BROKEN” I’m Just Going “2” Be “A” Roller Coaster For The Rest Of My Life. Because This Pain Really Hurts So Badly!
🙏
I feel for u as I have lost my husband and I feel the same , 😭😭🤗🤗🙏💔💔❤️❤️🙏🙏
Thank you for your comment Maree,
This is a very difficult journey for us.
But God will see us through.
God be with you...🙏🕊
I found you, Len and you too, Jack as I was looking for others with the loss of the spouse. When I was 10, my dad died, and I did not handle it well. After 5 yrs. I realized that God Is in Heaven and I am on earth. Even if I wanted to punish God, I could not. What did I have that I was not given? Now, after nearly 49 yrs. of marriage, I recognize that I was gifted with those years too, there never was a guarantee. The best thing I can say, my dad taught me to read the Bible and my husband taught me to love the Word of God. I am blessed. Len, Jack, may we use this opportunity for Jesus!
Those words you say are so true and well said. It seems that you get it , and are on a path of healing, though the hurt will stay alongside us till that new beginning arises in our hearts. I thank you for your comments as many will see your inspirational spirit of truth in what you have said. We have an awesome God. He comforts us daily even when we dont ask for it. May He reign in us thru Jesus Christ ,our blessed saviour...amen...🕊
Len, thank you for your message. I am so sorry you are going through this pain. That tells me that your wife was blessed to have you. I lost my hubby of 30 years on Jan 5 2021, so almost 2 years ago. Like you, I don't have children or family, so not much support. We were always together and did everything together, and didn't really have close friends. We had each other. I miss him terribly. I still go through really bad days, but the dark waves are spaced a bit further apart now. I guess that is the price of loving someone. He was my reason, my everything. Now there doesn't seem to be much reason for anything. At 74 it's hard to start over. He died suddenly, so I never got to say good by, or tell him how very much he meant to me. So many regrets of things I should have said more often. Besides missing them and feeling so lonely without them, I think the regrets are the worst. Just going out and doing simple things is so difficult because we did everything together. Always feels like a big part of me is missing. I know God is holding me up and walking with me. Without that I don't think I would be here. I am leaning more and more on Him. He will never leave us or let us down. It helps to hear from you and others. Lets me feel less alone. Thank you, and I have subscribed to your channel.
Well hello, Jay P. ...thank you for your wonderful comment. Your coming up to another special date, if that is the right way to call it. 2 years, for you and 1 year for me on 2.26.23. I worry more about that day more than any I have already been through. It does scare me a little, I am not that strong to begin with. My dear wife was, how did she do it... her faith. I should have watched her closer , I was just to busy to notice just how strong her belief in God was. I believe in God and his gospel of salvation. But I didn't live it , she did. I expect this hurting to go on for some time. Most tell me that. I think they are right. I still hurt really bad sometimes. Like you I think. I have some friends in the grief groups I attend but only talk at meetings mostly. No friends that are close. You sound like me or my journey in so many ways. You can type a word or thought here anytime. There are many here who are much wiser or further into their journey who can help. They certainly have helped me.......
We miss em , every day. One day we will hold them again in our arms tightly. What a day that will be. Until then we keep praying and believing. Have a blessed night and better day Jay P...🙏🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Thank you. Yes, that date will be hard for you. I know it is for me. This whole time of year is a reminder. We must think on how we will see them again one day. Thanks again.
(HUG) Your message was heartwarming to me, I too I miss my husb so much, we were together 55 yrs, did everything together, worked together, etc. He went through so much pain with lung & brain cancer, daily radiation and MRI, PET scans, cat scans, so much driving back and forth to all the many, many,, Dr appointments, I wish he never went through them, maybe he would have lived longer, they caused him so much pain and suffering. But I know he is without pain now, he is in the arms of Jesus, and we will be together soon God willing.
Len, I can relate to everything you shared on here. My grief is only 10 months old after losing my wife of 51 years. It's a hard journey, and i still cry every day at least once, but we have to carry on as best we can. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Hoping you get to feeling better eventually.
Thank you sir.
I am getting better as time has slipped away.
God bless...
So sorry for your loss. My husband of 40 years passed over 6 months too. He was a wonderful man. My hope is to honor him in my actions now. Videos on grief help me a lot. So, thanks for sharing. I also find to be active but don’t carry a lot of responsibility helps. That widow fog can be real embarrassing. So hugs to you my friend.
Thanks for your comments, we share the pain with each other to help and to heal. 40 years is a long time to love, deep is the hurt that only we understand. May God bless you MsTinaDiane. 🕊
Awwh this is touching. I lost my husband 11mths ago to covid 19. We were together for 3 yrs and just got married for 1yr. Total of 4yrs. We had plans for a future. It's hard to know that even though it may seem as i am young and can start fresh. That is not so, i hurt. I miss the person that could have grown old with me. Love is beautiful.
Hello Amanda, you hurt because you love. I never knew love could hurt so bad, love is beautiful, God made it to be that way. But the deeper the love the greater the painful hurt. You never really even got a chance to grow in this beautiful union of love. But you have do have good memories to help you through this terrible hurting. I am praying for peace in your heart and soul. May GOD bless and comfort you in this terrible anguish. 🙏🕊
Oh my gosh I lost my spouse 6 months ago It would have been my anniversary on the 26th of this month You sound exactly like how I feel I understand the cry I lost my world he was 48 years old I lost him to a brain aneurysm I kissed him goodbye and went to work and that was the end ,my heart goes out to you and yes there is a Jesus And yes she is happy and yes we do cry for ourselves but what are we supposed to do but if we supposed to do it hurts it's undescribable I'm 52 years old I'm a widow I can feel your pain it's so awful I don't have any other words to explain it sorry this is probably too bold I gotta go to work Have a blessed day sir my prayers are with you
My heart goes out to you tess, we will make it thru this , we see them again , we will hold them in are arms once more. I believe this , I think you do to. We must wait awhile longer ,,, but not too long....may God bless you and rap His loving arms around you thru Jesus Christ our Lord and saviour.....🕊
🕊hope u r doing good...🙏
Good early morning Len,
I'm 66, retired, live alone and don't have family close by. Although I do have two cats, they help..
I've even tried dating a couple of times but wind up just dropping out of sight. I think they call it ghosting today. Not fair to those women so, I've sort of given up on filling the aching loneliness and that is okay for now. I need to repair my soul before I can share with a different special someone.
I do have counseling when it becomes unbearable. Watching this specific video...made me realize I need to finish my grief process and rebuild a new purpose. That is what is missing: Purpose. I just don't give a....hoot.
Other than food, water and sleep; I've been in pause mode for a long time now. Coming up on anniversary five since I found her and how she left in such an ugly way. I keep telling myself, I'm ready to move on but, apparently that is not the case.
It's the willingness to rebuild that is difficult but, watching your pained face and hearing the cracks in your voice forced me to realize, I'm not out of the woods yet. I don't know our numbers nor, do I really wish to however, it is great to see your face.
Not sure where you are these days in your emotional travels, better I hope and I hope the best for your future. The quiet house is astounding to me...I heard the loud screams of silence each day but, ignored it just moving about eating, sleeping and only going out to grocery shop.
I hate to say it but, thank the Lord for Covid. That is not meant in a mean way, it just happened to coincide with the death of my wife, favorite aunt and mother. The wife in November 2019, favorite Aunt May 2020 and Mother October 2020.
So, isolating myself from the world actually made sense versus the guilt I would have placed on myself for being weak had it not happened that way. I was, and am to a smaller degree, crushed beyond my comprehension. I cried all the time, screamed at my Father in the darkness of a cold night and sobbed my heart all over and around me.
I would have been ashamed had I done that publicly. The few times when the tears spilled without warning in public, I tried to hide, turning or bowing my head and pretending to scratch an itch on my face. When at a gathering of peoples, I would just leave the house and go outside to hide my pain. I began to carry tissue whenever I went.
It becomes more bearable as time moves on but still, I have times...every once in a Blue Moon nowadays. I still look for her out of the corner of my eye.
Thank you. I commend you for using the Love that flows through your heart to share your journey so openly on a public level. Serving in the Marines didn't give me those kinds of guts. Through your words of Love, I find a Hope and know I can make it if I listen to my Faith. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your heart. I needed to hear your words and concern for us others out here looking for some form of solace from a world that says: "big boys don't cry." We do.
Bless your life forward and I hope you find laughter once again in your life. I'm working on me. You've helped.
Best regards,
Don
Wow ,
So well said Don.
Lots to unpack here.
After 2years I'm starting to make some progress with this horrible grief journey.
It will happen to some degree, given time.
Time is not an enemy, it is a friend of grief.
They work as a team.
You already know this, I'm sure.
God bless you for your well written response.
Peace to you my friend ...💪🙏
Hello Len, so sorry for your loss. I lost my partner 11 years ago I was 37 she was 28, we had been together for seven years & not a day goes by when I don’t think of her , grief is a very long road without any shortcuts and just when you think you’re doing fine, you’ll have a moment, when you reflect on your time together, I would say it becomes a little bit more bearable as the years go bye. I wish you all the love in the world for your journey ahead things will eventually get a little easier. Glyn
Thanks for your comment Glyn. I'm sorry for your loss also, it is a difficult road to walk. I know I won't forget my years. Sometimes with tears. GOD BLESS,...
Thinking about the gratitude of having been with my husband, and the good times we had, where we started out in life before it all ended after 48 years five months ago, has helped me navigate. I miss him immensely, but so grateful to have known and loved him, and to have been a partner to a great guy. He will always be with me in my heart. My heart goes out to you and others who are mourning their loved ones.
Hello Judy, thank you , very well said. Thankful for the 48 years. You understand the blessing thru the pain. I don't like this pain, but I do like the great memories that caused it to hurt so bad. I wouldn't trade them for anything...the first months it was to hard to breath let alone think rationally. Now I get it, some at least. It still hurts though. GOD BLESS....
I understand when it’s said some died of a broken heart. The grief and pain I felt early on scared me at times. I thought it was chest pain and I guess in a way it is, it’s our heart hurting so badly. 27 mos for me now. This intense pain is better but I’m still grieving and so lonely missing my husband of 50 yrs. This second year loneliness and missing him has been worse. But I will keep moving forward. My goal is for him to smile down and be proud of me. Hugs to all of you on this unwanted journey
Hi Dolores , I've felt that pain you talk about, it is scary to think that this pain can actually take your own life. Losing a spouse is an open wounded bleeding heart. It needs time to repair the damage of losing part of it and maybe the best part. In my case. Hope for some joy for the season of joy. For all of us on griefs journey.
My husband died 1 1/2 y ago, I watched him choke to death on our dinner. The first year was unending crying. Some things that have helped me are Griefshare, a group of people sharing their pain and videos of people who have learned to grieve well, also I had hypnosis for trauma. Grieving is a journey and we have to choose thoughts that help us to be Thankful for the time We had. I pray God comforts you and gives you peace during this difficult holiday season.
Thank you Sissy Smith. I tried not to imagine that pitchure that has played many times in your mind, I have one too. Not quite like yours, but one that is hard to overcome. You have had a hard road , I know, this journey has many twists and turns, but the healing will come in time. It has begun for me, slowly but surely. I have a big heart but sometimes it feels small and lost in the grief I read of others. Thank you again for sharing this story with me and with many who will be helped by it. May God bless you and yours for this Christmas and beyond...🙏🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 I have really been helped by the friendships I made with others suffering loss. It was a revelation to me that hypnosis could help trauma but it really has. I want others to realize that it’s possible
Its been 10 months since i lost my husband of 58 years. Life long knowing since birth. He is just gone . and it is just hard.
Hello iris, 10 months for me on the 26 of Dec. You surely have so many great memories to be thankful for. I know it's hard, this month and this Feb 26 23 , are going to be hard for me also... I think......
I get it Iris..................... May God bring you peace this Christmas and beyond...🙏🕊
Thank you for doing these videos. My wife passed away 6 months ago and I'm still processing my grief. Appreciate your time and thoughts.
Your welcome my friend, always here...God be with you...
Like you, I lost my sweet bride of 30+ years. We first met in high school and married first year in high school. Thank you so much for sharing your story and your faith. I too have a channel Pam and I started about travel but after losing her I added grief videos. Maybe you will find some of mine helpful as I've found yours. Look for "Traveling with Jack and Pam". God bless you sir.
Thanks for your kind reply, means alot to me, your wife is very beautiful also. I can understand your grief, my cindy is even more beautiful now. We just have to wait for our time. It won't be very long, I believe...God is with us...
I’m glad I stumbled upon your journey. I’ve watched a few of your videos. This one is really heartwarming. I’m just making it to 6 months and I’m just starting to feel a tad bit more hope. I don’t have a large family either but thank you 🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing . I lost my husband of 22 years , my soulmate Aug. 2021. It does get a bit easier but around this time. Holiday time, it’s been difficult. My faith in Jesus has carried me thru each day and I know my beloved husband is in heaven and we will see each other again. It just gets difficult at times when we are going thru this journey of grief. Love and peace to all who are grieving
Thank you for this comment. Steph M-P , your faith in Jesus, so glad to hear this. My first Christmas without my best friend next to me. I'll get through it like all of us, but it hurts already. I don't like that hurt. I'm trusting too , in his loving hands to guide us all, through this holiday season and beyond. So many hurting....May God bless you , and yours...
Tears welling in my eyes.I’m so sorry
My deepest sympathy Len! One day at a time and it does take time and everyone is different. My husband passed away over a year ago now and I still have difficult days.Im starting to move forward as I know that is what my husband would want me to do.
Thank you, your kind words are felt deep in my heart....
Corrine I'm alright I think and suddenly I'm not. Depressed today I lost my husband 5 months ago..suddenly no time to say goodbye just dropped down dead heart attack
I know the hurt as well because I also lost my wife and it was the roughest time of my life. You mentioned God and you you said the acceptance and that is the two most important words in your current walk. Believe in it more. God has a special place in his heart for widows and orphans so you are in his mercy. You probably wonder how can widowhood be a mercy of God if God could have intervene in the first place but accepting God's purpose is accepting. You see God has a purpose in everything. Your video just my be enough to save someone's life like you said. Keep walking, you are doing great. I became a competitive runner after my wife passed away, mostly from my time grieving. I just followed God's path and now I am enjoying his gift. Keep your eyes open and your ears listing he will guide you as you draw closer to him.
Thank you Tulio, I have heard many different things from many different people. Your comment rings so true to my heart. Almost as if you could see inside me. GOD sends a special word from some at the moment they need to hear it. I believe this is one of those. Sometimes it is just a simple few words that can make the difference in someone's life or course. May God continue to bless you...☝️
Just one more thank you...
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in September 2022 and he was only 55yrs old and I'm 51yrs old and only daughter is 34yrs old. I sometimes feel like I'm loosing my mind, the pain is too deep only those who have gone what we are going through can say they understand because losing a spouse is the most painful. One day at the time, prayer helps me to communicate my feelings to God and after I do feel a relieve. Evenings are horrible for me because we were best friends and I miss him so much. To all those that are in this journey may you all find strength that you need for each day. God help us.
Thank you Dudu Nhlabathi, your journey is just beginning to grab hold of you tightly. The grief you now feel is so very real and new, in so many ways. each day can bring on a different level of pain mixed with indecision and doubt. Your life can be altered permanently by the now empty place in your soul. Your world and your daughters has become different now. The feelings you are experiencing, are felt by so many others , myself included. I'm very glad to hear that you have a faith in God. If I could tell you only one thing , it would be trust in Jesus to help you through this terrible journey. When I hurt , I just say Jesus help me. He never took the hurt away, but He has walked with me through it thus far...praying for both of you, God's light and peace rest on you...🙏🕊
I lost my beloved mother unexpectedly on October 6 2022 and I'm heartbroken 😢💔. She lived with me my entire life and I miss her so much everyday. Is extremely painful. I'm praying to God for strength and healing.
Hello Sunrise Schubert, your loss of your dear mother is something that hurts very very much. My mother was so kind and special to anyone she met. This is hard to go through. Loss of a mother is at the top of the list. The top is shared with many family, but moms are so special. I've lost nearly all I have ever loved next to my wife is my dear kindly mother. It to still hurts, non stop. God is listening to your heartfelt prayers. He may not take all the hurt, but He will help you bear it, that's a promise from Him. GOD be with you...🙏🕊
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 Thank you. 🙏🏻
Praying with you and for you💜
@@sprinkles611 thank you Deborah I am blessed to recieve and give prayers. We all need them🙏🕊
Thanks for sharing. My wife, 51yrs of a happy marriage, passed just over two months ago. She was my guiding light, and gave me purpose. We both sacrificed for each other and now the emptiness I feel is overwhelming. No children, so all I have are the memories of a great ride through life. It's a struggle...
I know very well about the struggling you speak of. No one told me what this was going to be like. She was my reason and purpose, like you said. You are just beginning your 3rd month of this journey. My 1st and 2nd months were probably the hardest on me. My 3rd and 4th were a beginning of reality. She was not coming back. As I moved into the next few months, I began to do things we used to do together. This was not easy at first, but slowly I began to live this new life alone. The lonely feelings are always there, but the faith in God she lived now lives in me. And that faith, had carried me thus far. May God bring you peace, fshafly2.
I lost my 14 year old son nearly 21 months ago. Thank you for sharing your grief journey 🙏🏻❤️🙏🏻
Take heart God loves you,, time it's the best medicine,,,,,I lost my husband 20 years ago,,, now I full healed
Thanks Mary needed to hear that...
I fully understand everything you’re saying. Yes it’s very tough getting through every day. I tell myself to take each day in “baby steps”.
I’ve also lost my confidence in doing many things alone. I send a text to my husband every night telling him what
I’ve been doing and getting things off my chest in the hope he’ll read it. We were together for 50 years. It’s only 13 months since I lost him. Thanks to my lovely dog he’s what gets me up in the morning. Yes, it takes time and will get better but it’s not like taking meds to fix things completely.
Hello Moira, your comments are a reflection of many who share in this journey of hurt. I write in my journal about my feelings for that day and tell her all about it. I cry some while I'm writing. It brings me some comfort to lie in bed while I am writing. I look at her pillow and think of her smiling at me . I don't care what others may think, this is all I have. I trust in God to help me get thru each night and day. So far He has....🕊
I lost my husband a year and a half ago and I'm definitely better now. The first year was devastating; I would not wish it on anyone.
Hi Jill, thank you for your comment. I'm glad your doing better, in time most of us will. I always said from the start, I would not wish this on anyone. I feel it has become better, but the one thing I struggle with is the loneliness. May take more time, I think..May God bless your new year....
@@cindyandlenpresley...6118 After loosing my parents and two brothers, I thought I could emotionally handle anything. When I lost my hubby, it basically took the joy out of my life. Oddly enough, I'm glad he didn't have to go through this; I care about him too much; I'd rather bear this cross.
@@jillshaw9306 I know what you mean Jill. I feel the same. I don't wish this hurt on anyone. . .
That's very very painful . It reminds me the last hour of Jesus; in that garden of Gethsemane how He felt alone. You are a strong Man. Keep your faith up, all is going to be all right. Love in Christ. Praying for you.
Thank you Carla, God has blessed me with comments like yours. I can't tell you how much a simple word of encouragement can bring a greatful smile to hurtful frown. GOD BLESS you...
Len, your thoughts are just like mine. You have helped me and I appreciate it so much. I don't have any family left either. I can't believe this is my life now; but I have to accept it.
Hello Jen. It is a road of so many twists and turns this grief journey . Being alone is not fun, not at all. I know. And so do you now. Thats why I do this. To give us a place to grieve ,with some one who gets it and can talk and pray with each other . The prayers are the best part of this. Yes, it will begin to sink into you slowly you will have to accept it. I fought it for months. And now, I do believe it though with a lonely torn feeling left behind. Many here have been where you are and can talk and pray. My prayer for you is for healing of your broken heart to begin. And the peace of God to guide you now thru this horrible pain in your grief. God has you in His thoughts. You are not alone not really. Many here to help. GOD bless you Jen....
Thank you for your video
I understand it well. I lost my wife in June this year after 26 years of her suffering with MS. I cared for her most of that time. We were married 51 years. We built two homes to accommodate her needs. I walk a lot as well. It helps. We had a son and daughter and they are both married and I have 4 grandsons who live fairly closeby, but I don't see much of them. In many ways I have been grieving many years. She was unable to stand or walk the last 15 years. Her passing was a great relief for her. She was very special. I will be ok. I'm not looking for anyone else. I am getting used to saying I and me instead of us and we.
HELLO RON, your story is a hard one to listen too. I don't know how to respond to your words here. I had to read and reread over to get a good mental picture of of it all. I can't. There is a lot there to understand. I'm not capable of going that deep. I just listen to your voice, and feel your pain and your relief, that she is not suffering anymore. I hope your son and daughter bring YOUR grand sons over much or maybe they come over on there own. There's joy there. Your last statement really hit me hard. Getting use to saying me or I, not we our us. That brought tears to my eyes, and again as I text here, so true so true. My heart goes out to you my friend, lm praying for you now, may God bless you and yours...
I’m so sorry for your loss, i know how very much it hurts. God Bless and keep you always. And thank you for yor encouraging words.
Thank you for the reply, I'm trying to help others as I help myself too. God bless..
Sending you a big hug❤
Sorry for your loss.
Thank you Angela. GOD bless...