Nancy Pelosi Criticizes Trump's Controversial Abortion Statement

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  • Опубліковано 10 кві 2024
  • Seth addresses Biden considering Trump the "primary threat to freedom and democracy at home," Nancy Pelosi's commentary on Trump's abortion claim and more in his monologue for Wednesday, April 10.
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    Nancy Pelosi Criticizes Trump's Controversial Abortion Statement - Late Night with Seth Meyers
    • Nancy Pelosi Criticize...
    Late Night with Seth Meyers
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 254

  • @63ah1275
    @63ah1275 Місяць тому +71

    Who's never got a foot caught in a toe clip and fallen over? Besides Trump. Could you imagine Trump's ever been on a bike? 😂😂😂

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +11

      He has bone spurs, so his doctor said that riding in golf carts should be his only form of exercise.

    • @afg122602
      @afg122602 Місяць тому +6

      ​@sherinameless1618 you forget about all the kicking of the golf ball that he does.

    • @2010bigfathen
      @2010bigfathen Місяць тому +11

      I fell over three times because of those cleat type pedals, then I threw them away and got some “regular” pedals

    • @Dan-Simms
      @Dan-Simms Місяць тому +8

      Yeah those clip in ones with special shoes are so nice once you get used to them, it actually changes the way you pedal, being able to pull up on your foot too adds so much power but you are definitely going to fall over a bunch at the start.

    • @calinasagilitypartner4444
      @calinasagilitypartner4444 Місяць тому +5

      No. I don't think he learned as a child. We know his parents were very absent.

  • @rendonrjr
    @rendonrjr Місяць тому +241

    Interesting fact that 1864 abortion law, you can serve 2 to 5 years or duel the sheriff.

    • @australien6611
      @australien6611 Місяць тому +13

      Is that true? 😂

    • @ericinohio8999
      @ericinohio8999 Місяць тому +28

      That was a joke told on a recent Bulwark video. It is not true.

    • @warren52nz
      @warren52nz Місяць тому +28

      Was that when America was great? Still trying to think of when that was true... 🤔

    • @ericinohio8999
      @ericinohio8999 Місяць тому

      ua-cam.com/video/04H0Hmre-4A/v-deo.htmlsi=luVagMySjHZqpVgo

    • @ericinohio8999
      @ericinohio8999 Місяць тому +5

      Joke is at 04:45 or so. The joke reveal comes at 51:30. Both links are to timestamps in the Bulwark video, NOT Seth’s video here, which is too short anyway.

  • @TrueLeadership777
    @TrueLeadership777 Місяць тому +37

    Good to have the short monologue back.... Fits in well with the daily news to watch and have a laugh.

    • @Gildedmuse
      @Gildedmuse Місяць тому +3

      Ahh, I kind of like when it combined the monologue with A Closer Look or whatever reoccurring section they're doing. It means I can watch it all together, and any call backs in A Closer Look to the monologue works better when I don't watch them backwards.

  • @neliusbresnan3766
    @neliusbresnan3766 Місяць тому +67

    The off-season Jets burn makes me hear the following inside my head; "SIDE-BURN!!!.....PEWP! PEWP! PEWP! PEEEEEWP!"

    • @danielnarbett
      @danielnarbett Місяць тому

      Yep I had exactly the same reaction, with that 'Mortal Combat' announcer voice 😂

  • @ChristopherWiseSS-Fanboy
    @ChristopherWiseSS-Fanboy Місяць тому +59

    if youre eating anything not on the periodic table you can tell the people in charge youve found some new elements...

    • @phelan_pt
      @phelan_pt Місяць тому +5

      #correction

    • @Gildedmuse
      @Gildedmuse Місяць тому +5

      Do Seth's writers think that apples are made of the some non elemental particles. Maybe some kind of Apple Quirk and if enough of them exist in the same place you get an apple.

    • @debjoy12
      @debjoy12 Місяць тому +1

      I had a wonderful lunch today consisting mainly of carbon, hydrogen, oxygen, nitrogen, magnesium, iron, potassium, sulfur, and phosphorus, with trace amounts of zinc and seasoned with chlorine and sodium. you?

    • @susandevoe6002
      @susandevoe6002 Місяць тому

      OR, "The buck starts here."

  • @darkmythsrevenge
    @darkmythsrevenge Місяць тому +29

    I don't understand how something can be enforced before it was a state. Minimum it should have to be re voted on anything after statehood.

    • @sanseijedi
      @sanseijedi Місяць тому +4

      Oh, you are giving those who want that to be state law WAAAAY too much credit for critical thinking!

    • @j.e.bennett5635
      @j.e.bennett5635 Місяць тому

      Large portions of the West were territories with laws, regulations, and government prior to statehood when they got to have federal representatives in Washington DC. Interesting history of you ever want to take a read

  • @keeshiabrie
    @keeshiabrie Місяць тому +30

    Good, you’re back to uploading just the monologue!

    • @kennyn1992
      @kennyn1992 Місяць тому +2

      Exactly. Something with the prefix mono should stand alone.

  • @avidaire231
    @avidaire231 Місяць тому +9

    THANK YOU! A solo monologue feels so light and delicious when not encumbered by having previously consumed ACL. Appreciate you.

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +2

      Plus, it seems nice to enjoy some delightful comments from smart and funny people, without having to deal with all the bots and humorless commenters the longer spots attract. Not that I am saying that you and I are better than them, but . . .

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Місяць тому +30

    Lunchables could rebrand as a Heavy Metal Rock & Roll snack. 🤘

  • @intheshell35ify
    @intheshell35ify Місяць тому +23

    Love how Seth analyzes the jokes as he is telling them and even occasionally throws a writer under a bus.

  • @stillsacred
    @stillsacred Місяць тому +62

    Petition to have Biden in again to do a special edition of Seriously with Seth and Amy!

    • @alv4ro
      @alv4ro Місяць тому +3

      you mean "really" with seth and amy

    • @stillsacred
      @stillsacred Місяць тому

      @@alv4ro Seriously?

  • @LE-te9vx
    @LE-te9vx Місяць тому +7

    Some of those jokes escaped Surprise Inspection and Jokes Seth Can't Tell

  • @juliasimpson1759
    @juliasimpson1759 Місяць тому +24

    Arizona was a territory at the time. ✌️💙

  • @ralphdecoste474
    @ralphdecoste474 Місяць тому +18

    Harry Truman, "The buck stops here." Donald Trump, "The buck stops with the states."

  • @nedgrant918
    @nedgrant918 Місяць тому +11

    “Don’t shoot the piano player”… We went to a Bach concert at a church in Tucson a few years ago and there was a sign on the door that said “please do not bring firearms into God’s house”… Anybody surprised at “1864“? These people haven’t caught up with the Industrial Revolution yet… 😂🤣

    • @dr.jamesolack8504
      @dr.jamesolack8504 Місяць тому

      Kinda like “don’t bring firearms into the bank”….

  • @TheMulToyVerse
    @TheMulToyVerse Місяць тому +12

    Since when did Costco sell frick’n gold bars?!?

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +16

      Once the toilet paper shortage was over, they needed another high-end product.

    • @rabbit251
      @rabbit251 Місяць тому +8

      @@sherinameless1618 I love it when the jokes in the Comments are funnier than Seth's writers!

    • @peterg5383
      @peterg5383 Місяць тому

      @@sherinameless1618: epic line, kudos!

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +1

      @@peterg5383 Thank you! I get nostalgic for those days when we thought that running out of TP and dying of Covid would be a small price to pay for never having to think of Trump after 2021.

  • @theparadoxicaltouristtrave9320
    @theparadoxicaltouristtrave9320 Місяць тому +7

    Was that a joke Seth can't tell? I hope that bit comes back.

  • @kadoferusuraimu
    @kadoferusuraimu Місяць тому +31

    Correction: ribbons get cut at the opening of new bridges, so those aren’t the bridges that need the extra structural support.

    • @solvseus
      @solvseus Місяць тому +12

      Not just new, re-openings too.
      Or if you're a Republican, you can just take credit for whatever even if you voted against it.

    • @kennyn1992
      @kennyn1992 Місяць тому +1

      Or is the joke maybe that they're so bad to begin with that they do.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Місяць тому +1

      @@kennyn1992If the selection process of the engineers are anything like it is for the presidency…

    • @plane-crashes-aussie-stories
      @plane-crashes-aussie-stories Місяць тому

      No. Trump changed that.

  • @angrytrader3783
    @angrytrader3783 Місяць тому +7

    Maybe if this leave it to the states thing doesn't work for Trump and the Republicans, Trump can suggest the local sheriff gets to decide for the woman?

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому

      Remember when Republican candidate Dr. Oz said that abortion should be between a woman, her doctor, and local officials? So yes, the sheriff would work.
      UPDATED AFTER I ACTUALLY KNEW WHAT I was talking about.

  • @aarono3090
    @aarono3090 Місяць тому +3

    Is an "off season Jets burn" an afterburn?

  • @shirleyhino3945
    @shirleyhino3945 Місяць тому +2

    Corrections. The periodic table is outdated.
    Element 113’s symbol should be Nh
    Element 115’s symbol is Mc
    Element 117’s symbol is Ts
    Element 118’s symbol is Og

    • @wereoctopus
      @wereoctopus Місяць тому

      It's probably up-to-date with what students have on their classroom wall.

  • @piafunesbakker5095
    @piafunesbakker5095 Місяць тому

    ❤ your show Mr. Seth!!!

  • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
    @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому +6

    The Bronx River is an awesome story about environmental comeback. All the hard work, clean up after clean up, the joy when the beavers and other wildlife returned to the river. A story we all need to know as we try to save our dying planet. Seth, come to the Bronx with a camera and film the Bronx River so you can see for yourself. Bring your writers so they can stop using ignorant hurtful jokes about the Bronx from the 1970s. And let's hold Con Edison accountable for their oil spill.

    • @filonin2
      @filonin2 Місяць тому

      Yeah, no one is going to do that.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому

      @@filonin2 Sad. Your loss.

    • @kimmiesoo
      @kimmiesoo 27 днів тому

      They likely won't see this comment, but it can't hurt to send an email to the show.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 26 днів тому

      Another individual indicated that Manhattan College is holding a conference this week on water issues where this issue might be discussed.

  • @jb888888888
    @jb888888888 Місяць тому +5

    Correction the Costco gold "bars" are (a) only 1 oz each and (b) you're limited to buying 5 of them max. And (c) [almost?] exclusively online.

    • @dr.jamesolack8504
      @dr.jamesolack8504 Місяць тому +1

      I’d say your probably doing okay if you can walk into Costco and drop $12,500 for 5 items.

  • @ecamp6360
    @ecamp6360 Місяць тому +5

    Boooooo on you, Seth. The Bronx River has made an amazing comeback from decades ago. Thanks to groups like Bronx River Alliance and Bronx Council for Environmental Quality (BCEQ). (I am a former secretary of BCEQ.)
    Invite head of Bronx River Alliance on show. Or better yet, come and visit. Lots of nature and wildlife: muskrat, beaver, coyotes, rabbits, and maybe even the river otter, fisher cat and bobcat will make an appearence.
    You need to make amends for a cheap joke at the Bronx's expense.

    • @phelan_pt
      @phelan_pt Місяць тому +1

      #correction 🐾

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому +1

      Thank you! I was angrily scrolling through comments to see if anyone else heard what I heard!! The Bronx River has made an AWESOME comeback. Several groups had a hand in working to repair the Bronx River since at least the 1980s. Pulling abandoned vehicles out of the river, clean up after clean up after clean up, the joy when beavers returned to the Bronx River. Seth needs to film a visit to the Bronx River since it is clear that he has never been and doesn't know what he is talking about, and none of the writers on his staff care enough to know what they are talking about either. Made me so angry. Take the 2 train, or take metro north to the botanical gardens station. Visit the Bronx Zoo. Take a short walk. Learn something.

    • @kimmiesoo
      @kimmiesoo 27 днів тому +1

      @ecamp6360 I suggest you reach out to the show (email for corrections?) rather than just leave a comment here.
      Such a crime there was an oil spill after recovering so well.😢

    • @ecamp6360
      @ecamp6360 27 днів тому +1

      @kimmiesoo it will definitely come up at Bronx Water Conference next week at Manhattan College.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 26 днів тому

      I hope Con Edison will attend so that they can publicly commit to a speedy clean up that they will pay for.

  • @lokilowkey3049
    @lokilowkey3049 Місяць тому +3

    It genuinely makes me sad how bad Seths' writers are while he is good. How does Fallon survive as a tonight show?.

  • @sherinameless1618
    @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +21

    I liked the Oscar the Grouch joke, but if you tell me it was a Scollins, I will know that the doctors are right about my emerging psychopathology.

    • @kristieamaya3365
      @kristieamaya3365 Місяць тому +8

      No way, it was definitely the Dad Joke Guy (I'm blanking on his name right now)

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +5

      @@kristieamaya3365 Yes, I think you may be right. Brian? Ward? Mr. Rogers? Anyway, the one who seemed much too nice to be working there.

    • @sirspate
      @sirspate Місяць тому +5

      @@sherinameless1618 They're all 'too nice to be working there', but then again, Seth would probably retort that they're not exactly working, before seguing into another surprise inspection. ;)

    • @SugarandSarcasm
      @SugarandSarcasm Місяць тому

      I've been fooled before, thinking it was a Scollins when it had actually been Matt's. Probably missing the pattern, or just not paying enough attention

  • @JasonDeline
    @JasonDeline Місяць тому +2

    Why are you posting this 8 hours after Closer Look when this part comes first on the broadcast? Please fix.

  • @sherinameless1618
    @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +13

    Is Seth allowed to do lesbian jokes when he is not a lesbian or a black woman? Asking for a friend.

    • @Muglez14
      @Muglez14 Місяць тому +6

      The best part of that joke is you can see Jenny pitching it with that exact same smug crossed-arms-shoulder-waggle.

    • @rabbit251
      @rabbit251 Місяць тому +4

      That should've been a Jenny joke!

    • @afg122602
      @afg122602 Місяць тому +5

      My first thought was,
      " shouldn't this be on jokes Seth can't tell?"

    • @sirspate
      @sirspate Місяць тому +3

      They broke him in the Special 50th Edition.

    • @InformationLiesAtTheEdges
      @InformationLiesAtTheEdges Місяць тому +4

      Maybe Seth feels he can do these after his lesbian make-over with Kristen Stewart. 🙂

  • @bobjones6646
    @bobjones6646 Місяць тому +5

    It looks like the first element Seth points to was Arsenic which I really hope he, and the children, didnt have today.

    • @mariag.8242
      @mariag.8242 Місяць тому

      Unfortunately heavy metals are in a lot more food than you’d think.

  • @JasonDeline
    @JasonDeline Місяць тому +1

    Need that deep-voiced "off-season Jets burrrrrrn" VO and super.

  • @hulonthesurvivor5884
    @hulonthesurvivor5884 Місяць тому +1

    The Best…

  • @k...5853
    @k...5853 Місяць тому +3

    GRAPHICS CORRECTION: this coming season the Jets will have a significantly different logo on their helmets than the one shown. The design was leaked last week and although the team won't officially announce the design until April 15, why pass up an opportunity to shoot a spitball at the graphics department

  • @joshfactor1
    @joshfactor1 Місяць тому +2

    wait, how do you accidentally spill a thousand gallons of oil into a river?

    • @filonin2
      @filonin2 Місяць тому

      You're moving a tank of oil near a river and it spills. Pretty simple.

  • @kpr2
    @kpr2 Місяць тому

    Periodic table? You're soaking in it!

  • @SpaceForceCommander
    @SpaceForceCommander Місяць тому +8

    Seth wouldn’t like to be remembered as innocently eating ice cream with the president turning into an international news story.

  • @stillsacred
    @stillsacred Місяць тому +6

    When you pointed to the periodic table and said, "I had a little bit of that" it looks like you were pointing to the lanthanides and actinides, which would probably kill them, Putin styles.

    • @danbsports6760
      @danbsports6760 Місяць тому +1

      And for dessert, a Putin cup. Choice of chocolate or vanilla Putin.

  • @das_daw374
    @das_daw374 Місяць тому

    The "off season yets burn" should have had the ususal stamp, sound + voice over. Please adress in the format you refuse to call corrections now

  • @tuckerbowen4626
    @tuckerbowen4626 Місяць тому +1

    2:29-2:34 study first published in the _New England Journal of Reinforcing Hurtful Stereotypes_

  • @pepsiwepsi1952
    @pepsiwepsi1952 Місяць тому +4

    Happy Thursday! ☀️

  • @coreyrosen3397
    @coreyrosen3397 Місяць тому +1

    #Corrections Ribbons are only cut on new or refurbished bridges for an opening. The ribbon would not be helping to hold up a new bridge.

  • @Makoto-Hayashi
    @Makoto-Hayashi Місяць тому +1

    Missed opportunity for Seth to ask Sloppy Joe to put in a good word w/ Ben & Jerry to reconsider a LNSM ice cream flavor. 😅
    Most of tonight’s jokes need to get a Surprise Inspection, esp. the closer. 😱

  • @jackie2joints248
    @jackie2joints248 Місяць тому

    I accidentally spilled oil into a river 😂😂😂😂 kindergarten excuses in the adult world.

  • @Taphfy
    @Taphfy Місяць тому +1

    The Satisfied Frogg!

  • @S.Shea2432
    @S.Shea2432 Місяць тому +15

    In an interview.
    Trump: "I'm Pro-Choice."
    Reporter: "You're Pro-Choice?"
    Trump: "I'm Pro-Life."
    Oh, wait, He's always wishy washy!! 🙄🙄

    • @sirspate
      @sirspate Місяць тому +4

      Trump: "I'm a pro, what can I say."

    • @user-sv5ji3hf4g
      @user-sv5ji3hf4g Місяць тому

      Is this what is called a flip flopper position?

  • @ZachariahWiedeman
    @ZachariahWiedeman Місяць тому +6

    If the law came after "Don't shoot the piano player" it would be their second law. 🤷‍♀️

    • @ZachariahWiedeman
      @ZachariahWiedeman Місяць тому +3

      Yep. But a "first law" after some other random non ordinal law would be completely meaningless. Therefore instead of saying:
      "First law after..."
      He said: "First law, after..."
      The comma makes all the difference. The way he read the joke and the way the joke is structured, it would have made a lot more sense if he had said, "Second law, after..."

  • @GTARC-2023
    @GTARC-2023 Місяць тому +2

    I thought Oscar was a New Yorker?

    • @lisab9541
      @lisab9541 Місяць тому

      Winters in FL???!!!

  • @samuelpierce7664
    @samuelpierce7664 Місяць тому +9

    Correction: many Aboriginal indigenous people were in Arizona in 1864. It is unfortunate to ever suggest that there were no people in a location. Also, Spanish colonies were well established and the Mexican and Spanish governments had controlled the area until the Mexican war. To be fair, the creation of az territory was in 1863 so the overall premise of your remark - that is was an early law - seems truthy.

  • @plane-crashes-aussie-stories
    @plane-crashes-aussie-stories Місяць тому +2

    An 1864 abortion law? That's so long ago that they didn't even have coat hangers to do backyard butchering. I think things are a little more safe and clinical now. And they really shouldn't have all-guy discussions on the abortion issue, IMO.

  • @Stop.Honchotime
    @Stop.Honchotime Місяць тому

    I'm pretty sure Az passed 13-1169 "Dont shoot the piano player" in the late (19)70s,

  • @lynnchiodo.1233
    @lynnchiodo.1233 Місяць тому

    Crazy Tonight.

  • @anniejankovic8056
    @anniejankovic8056 Місяць тому

    Is it fair to guess the Oscar the Grouch joke was courtesy of Scollins?

  • @jdantigua1999
    @jdantigua1999 Місяць тому +11

    If you have been waiting for the perfect time to make a donation to Ruben Gallego's campaign for Senate, we are here to tell you TODAY is the day.
    Earlier today, Kyrsten Sinema declared she was NOT going to run for reelection.
    That means it's Ruben vs. Kari "Fake" Lake.

    • @bovinityleak2066
      @bovinityleak2066 Місяць тому

      Who’s that scoundrel enima gonna be wking for? Or more exactly…which lobbying firm?

  • @lashendawest7509
    @lashendawest7509 Місяць тому +1

    Good morning seth meyers fans

  • @sarahj6795
    @sarahj6795 28 днів тому +1

    Kinda thrown by "Was anybody even there yet", usually this show is better than that. People have been there for thousands of years, and it's concerning no one who read this joke beforehand seemed to remember that Indigenous people exist.

  • @goodandevil2000
    @goodandevil2000 Місяць тому +1

    0:26 yes Seth, native Americans were there...

  • @MarvinG88
    @MarvinG88 Місяць тому

    What's with the texture on the Arizona picture?

  • @kennyn1992
    @kennyn1992 Місяць тому +1

    As long as you only eat the stuff full of the periodic table about once a month you'll be fine.

  • @Boaz833
    @Boaz833 Місяць тому +2

    Abortion is about equality for everyone. A woman should not be forced to risk her life and health by putting her body through a pregnancy for the same reason a man should not be forced to donate an organ or marrow or even a tiny bit of blood to save a dying child.

  • @Moekoffee2001
    @Moekoffee2001 Місяць тому +8

    Seth and Joe had to go for a cone because that’s what you do when you’re scooping Stephen Colbert(‘s Americone Dream)

  • @richradley2706
    @richradley2706 Місяць тому +1

    February 14, 1912 Arizona became a state

  • @alyssaskier2656
    @alyssaskier2656 Місяць тому

    2:45 - Oh, she knew!

  • @MrBaskins2010
    @MrBaskins2010 Місяць тому +1

    eric adams is oscar the grouch

  • @janejetson2978
    @janejetson2978 Місяць тому

    She was supposed to text me this week's stock options. ☹️

  • @kittys.2870
    @kittys.2870 Місяць тому +5

    VOTE 💙 BLUE, ALL 💙 BLUE AND NOTHING BUT 💙 BLUE 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙!

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому

      🗽💙🌊💙🌊🗽

    • @paulyricca3881
      @paulyricca3881 Місяць тому

      🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

    • @paulyricca3881
      @paulyricca3881 Місяць тому

      @@girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

  • @TheRealPOTUSDavidByrd
    @TheRealPOTUSDavidByrd Місяць тому

    Wait if he's naked in a trash can... Is he really naked?

  • @NewMessage
    @NewMessage Місяць тому +1

    Next time Joe's on, they should do a 'Really?' segment, but rename it "I'm serious".

  • @kyley9768
    @kyley9768 Місяць тому

    Hi 🎉

  • @1978TAR
    @1978TAR Місяць тому +1

    👮‍♀️👮👮‍♀️⚖️DONALD TRUMP THINK HE CAN TELL AMERICANS ANYTHING ⚖️👮‍♀️👮👮‍♀️🇺🇲

  • @marc21256
    @marc21256 Місяць тому

    How can a law that predates Arizona be valid in Arizona?

    • @crazywayne7051
      @crazywayne7051 Місяць тому +1

      The same way The law of the land better known as the Constitution amendments and other laws took full effect when Arizona became part of the United States.

  • @donaldwhittaker7987
    @donaldwhittaker7987 Місяць тому

    Funny stuff 😂

  • @taipan801
    @taipan801 Місяць тому

    Seriously. Trump being about to become the most famous joke in the world, reminds me of the old joke about Pierre the famous Mountain Climber.
    I am Pierre the famous Mountain Climber, I have climbed every mountain in the world. But does anyone ever say, "look there goes Pierre the famous Mountain Climber"? No.
    I am Pierre the famous Explorer, I have explored every remote region on the planet. But does anyone ever say, "look there goes Pierre the famous Explorer"? No.
    I am Pierre the famous Athlete, I have won more medals than anyone in the world. But does anyone ever say, "look there goes Pierre the famous Athlete"? No.
    I tell you, you f#@k one Goat........

  • @markwhat3637
    @markwhat3637 Місяць тому

    2:50 careful Seth you're married to a lawyer

  • @user-ep3iq2vp9i
    @user-ep3iq2vp9i Місяць тому

    All kids would been

  • @kaladan1890
    @kaladan1890 Місяць тому +1

    oh god seth that last joke was bad on so many angle...

  • @robertlloyd122
    @robertlloyd122 Місяць тому

    ... Costco sells gold bars?!?

  • @ashlaynesaar
    @ashlaynesaar Місяць тому

    With the report about lesbian organs, there's a joke in there somewhere for JSCT for Jenny. Get on it, writers!!

  • @justayoutuber1906
    @justayoutuber1906 Місяць тому

    Why does he use The Office theme song?

    • @scremped
      @scremped Місяць тому

      Where do you hear that?

  • @CyclopsWasRight616
    @CyclopsWasRight616 Місяць тому

    2:41 Seth tells a joke he can't tell.

  • @jasonjohnson4803
    @jasonjohnson4803 Місяць тому +2

    That Bronx River/Oil joke was filthy good. 😂

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому +1

      The Bronx River is absolutely not a joke. It's an awesome story about an amazing environmental comeback. Making a joke about the Bronx River just demonstrates how stupid and lazy his writers are. They can't even Google something. Seth, here's how you correct this mess. Take the 2 train, take a short walk, take a camera with you. Learn something about the Bronx River. Stop being stupid and hurtful.

  • @dhabbott41
    @dhabbott41 Місяць тому

    Seth you have no shame.

  • @matthewhannigan4666
    @matthewhannigan4666 Місяць тому

    I've heard Biden say, "and that's no joke" more than "seriously;" just so he's clear that there won't be a pie in the face.

  • @mvvpro8688
    @mvvpro8688 Місяць тому +6

    Maybe someone should tell Seth's writers that the reason Biden keeps saying unnecessary words like seriously and no joke is because that's how he overcame his stutter. Or you can be just like Trump and make fun of a man's disability.

  • @SeppelSquirrel
    @SeppelSquirrel Місяць тому +1

    None of the top comments are talking about lesbians so here's your lesbian comment to upvote!

  • @OscarSommerbo
    @OscarSommerbo Місяць тому +7

    The polluted oil joke is true, once the oil went into the river the oil was probably unusable.

    • @sunshine3914
      @sunshine3914 Місяць тому +1

      Yeah, felt bad laughing about that.

    • @ecamp6360
      @ecamp6360 Місяць тому +1

      Screw U. The Bronx River is cleaner these days because of citizen action.

    • @OscarSommerbo
      @OscarSommerbo Місяць тому

      @@ecamp6360 I am not saying it isn't, I was remarking on the relative contamination of the oil. You choose to interpret that as some sort of endorsement of environmental destruction.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому +1

      Making jokes about the Bronx is lazy and stupid and hurtful. Bronx jokes show that Seth's writers haven't had a new idea since the 1970s. Sad. Seth, here's how you fix it if you care at all. Take the 2 train or Metro North. Bring a camera. Visit the Bronx Zoo and the Botanical Gardens; the Bronx River runs through both of those "tourist" attractions, so you don't even have to interact with the real Bronx if you don't want to. Film the real Bronx River, not your joke from the 1970s. Next time, Google something before you insult the Bronx.

    • @ecamp6360
      @ecamp6360 Місяць тому

      @@OscarSommerbo And who's going to reuse that oil? At best, it gets sopped up and landfilled.

  • @dhabbott41
    @dhabbott41 Місяць тому +3

    The oil joke was the best.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому

      The oil joke was stupid and completely uninformed. The Bronx River has made an amazing comeback since the 1980s. Wildlife has returned, especially beavers. Educate yourself. Hop on the 2 train, visit the Bronx Zoo, and you will pass the Bronx River on your way to the Zoo entrance. Beautiful clear rushing water. Now Con Ed needs to clean up their mess. And Seth needs writers who Google something before making a stupid hurtful joke. The comeback of the Bronx River is very well documented.

    • @dhabbott41
      @dhabbott41 Місяць тому +1

      @@girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 I am apologize for being dumber than dirt.

    • @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288
      @girlfromthebronxbywayofelb7288 Місяць тому

      Thank you. I appreciate your feedback. Come visit! The Botanical Gardens are directly across from the Bronx Zoo. Don't miss a short walk to Little Italy at Arthur Avenue and 187th Street. Bread warm from the oven, awesome mozzarella, every yummy thing you can imagine! Enjoy.

  • @Doran1991
    @Doran1991 Місяць тому +1

    Shame on you for dismissing the existence of the many Native Americans with long histories in the land Arizona now occupies. Disappointing that you would so carelessly make that cheap and unfunny a joke.

  • @neilmarshall308
    @neilmarshall308 Місяць тому +8

    "Was anybody even there yet?" is an absolutely *wild* line to make it into the monologue. Even if you're going in to google completely raw with "when was arizona settled" it gives you 12,000 years of human existence. Google--the thing you do you wikipedia something--manages to remember people were in Arizona before colonisation.

    • @jeffb.6642
      @jeffb.6642 Місяць тому +2

      you know it's just part of the "joke" right?

    • @havcola6983
      @havcola6983 Місяць тому +3

      "Absolutely wild" is a bit disingenuous, isn't it?
      The subtext is clearly "Was any [colonizers] there yet [to put down that law]?", because the topic is based around the American legal system made by European colonizers. But that's too clunky for a joke.
      Bringing Native Americans into the joke would just introduce a red herring. Not saying a joke couldn't be written on that premise, but it'd have an entirely different punchline than the abortion law being ridiculously outdated

    • @neilmarshall308
      @neilmarshall308 Місяць тому

      @@havcola6983 yes, an unjust, cruel law citing precedent from over 150 years ago is definitely worth mocking. I don't know if pretending people weren't around back then is a punchline unless you don't consider the people living there as being "anybody". It's also not ideal as 1864 was the exact year of the "Long Walk" where 8000 Navajo were marched by the US army from Arizona to a reservation in New Mexico during which several hundred died from exposure and starvation, and those who did survive lived in conditions described as "internment-like". What I'm saying is that a show that has a recurring section called "Seth Holds a Surprise Inspection of His Monologue Writers" and an online exclusive segment called "Corrections" where it's clear that jokes not only get researched and reviewed, but the ones that make it to air in a 4-minute segment are just a handful from dozens submitted for that day, have made an active choice in putting this line in the monologue at the top of the show and that choice asks the audience to pretend people who were deliberately displaced, killed and interned by a nation didn't exist.

    • @sirspate
      @sirspate Місяць тому +1

      @@havcola6983 It's something that could easily be acknowledged by a tag, though. You don't need to make it part of the setup.

    • @neilmarshall308
      @neilmarshall308 Місяць тому +1

      ​@@havcola6983 the joke relies mechanically on the audience agreeing that there was not "anybody" in Arizona in 1964 because it was so long ago. However, Arizona had been inhabited for millennia, but during that exact year, 1964, the remaining 8000+ Navajo (after a campaign of persecution and violence) people living there were marched by the US Army to internment camps in New Mexico in conditions where 200+ perished due to exposure and starvation. It's known as the Long Walk. For a programme where there are not 1 but 2 regular segments that centre on the analysis of the jokes used on air (Corrections) and the jokes that do not make it (Seth Holds a Surprise Inspection of His Monologue Writers...), it's clear that a lot of care and attention goes into each joke that makes it. Each monologue is comprised of hundreds of jokes that have been winnowed down to the few that are going to get a laugh and will not offend or confuse (Seth's stated set of standards). This means that there were other options, an active choice was made to use this joke and either zero research was done into the premise, date or location, or research was done and it was deemed OK to refer to a persecuted people in the specific year of their persecution and forced removal as not "anyone".

  • @danismithmn
    @danismithmn Місяць тому

    Or she REALLY knew what it was for. :wink wink:

  • @MattSeremet
    @MattSeremet Місяць тому

    I see you went back to posting just the intro "monologue" without appending the "A Closer Look" monologue. There was a big watch drop off after the intro, wasn't there?

  • @FrankBenlin
    @FrankBenlin Місяць тому

    Ha ha. Thanks, Conan.

  • @wonmiii
    @wonmiii Місяць тому +1

    Thank god they went back to separating the monologue and a closer look into separate videos, i bet their viewer retention dropped

  • @EricAllen8494
    @EricAllen8494 Місяць тому +1

    😂😂😂

  • @briannunya2838
    @briannunya2838 Місяць тому

    Nancy is inside trading

  • @susandevoe6002
    @susandevoe6002 Місяць тому +1

    Nice to know that Biden can fall off a bike, at his age, WITHOUT breaking a hip or a rib or a wrist tho, right???? (Not Kidding).

  • @crazywayne7051
    @crazywayne7051 Місяць тому

    It's definitely her fault when three air compressors and for jackhammers can't bring straight women to a climax.
    Lesbians can accomplish this just looking at each other from across the room.😮

    • @lb5368
      @lb5368 Місяць тому

      Nope. No one's fault. That said, not everyone likes power tools in bed. 😮

  • @Ricphil
    @Ricphil Місяць тому

    :)

  • @kevinchong5424
    @kevinchong5424 Місяць тому +1

    2:37 Seriously, Seth? You as the one with the lesbian haircut, is blaming her?

  • @cassiusdhami9215
    @cassiusdhami9215 Місяць тому +1

    Democrats: "We must vote for Joe because democracy is at stake and Trump would be no better."
    People: "Can Joe stop the genocide for the sake of our democracy?"
    Democrats: "No"!

  • @karlaallen2971
    @karlaallen2971 Місяць тому +1

    Wasn't that before Arizona was even a state. Is it even enforceable?

    • @sherinameless1618
      @sherinameless1618 Місяць тому +2

      Yes, Arizona was just a territory then, and men were men, and women were chattel, and America was great! As to whether it is enforceable, I guess some poor doctors will find out.

    • @havcola6983
      @havcola6983 Місяць тому +2

      Because of the way the legal system works in the US (and much of the former British Empire) laws are enforceable even if they predate the formation of the country, as long as they're not contradicted by a later law.
      Yes, that means medieval legal rulings from England could, theoretically, show up in court

    • @desmondmolloy9173
      @desmondmolloy9173 Місяць тому +1

      Yes. I don’t like that it’s come to this, but it’s the responsibility of the AZ legislature that the law is still there. The court doesn’t get to pretend that it doesn’t exist.