People often point out that Bowser goes way too easy on Mario, sending pathetic goombas to kill him and making the lava pits too small. But in the majority of timelines Mario dies and never faces bowser.
How quickly can you touch A Friend in every Mario? How quickly can you touch Authority in every Kirby? How quickly can you touch Air in every Metroid game?
bro getting a life in kirby is so easy actually wait it depends on which game your playing if ur playing like magalor epilogue or return to dream land then that does not apply
I think you can lose a life faster in SM 64 by going to a wall, make a triple jump into it, wall jump and do a ground pound at the peak of the jump, that way you take fall damage. Repeat four times and you are dead in the castle grounds.
I travel back to 1994 after the Mario movie already exists. I explain to people that in the future year 2023 on the internet (what is the internet???) there is a channel, like a videocassette, but you don't have to leave home, like watching TV, but videocassette, but without leaving home. There's a channel that makes funny videos about Mario. Yes, this is the future. And that humanity is dying out because you, which means us, so we didn't listen to the scientists back then. Well I did and do, but I'm not the mass of people. Somehow that also fits the morbid theme of the video. The end is near.
I think this should count for Ghost since you're technically touching Ground whenever you're... well, Grounded. If that's not enough for Ground though, then Ground could be an underground level or something
Go touch grass! -> Touches grass Drink some water. -> Jumps into water Get a life! -> Literally gets a life ??? -> Loses a life ... I wonder what the incentive might've been this time.
Could easily cut 30s out of Mario 64. You can get ontop of the castle early without the cannon and there's a small area you can ledge grab that'll insta kill Mario. Or if you want to do glitchless (Getting on top of the castle I would consider "tech" not a glitch, the same way you claimed lakitu skip is a speedrun strat) you can triple jump wall kick ground pound off the tower on top of the castle for fall damage
Touching money could be another challenge you can do in these games :) Also jeez for being the easiest enemy Goomba’s are also apparently the deadliest
I think I might know two more video game characters that I have felt more pain and dad then Mario starting off with the walnut from plants versus zombies and probably the one video game character who has lost the most lives, and there has been most fails henry stick man from the Henry Stickman collection 0:28
SMB-Those damn cheep-cheeps on the bridge can still get me. SMB2-i still miss jumps in 5-1. SMB3-Big Bass will occasionally eat me. SMW-Reznors!!! >:\/ YI-Goonie Bird Flight. 😑
Wouldn't it be faster to clip out of bounds in the sm64 castle courtyard? (Maneuver to top right area of caste, hang off ledge behind wall, lift yourself back up from hanging, die instantly?) The trick can be pretty tricky to pull off, though.
SOOOOOOO now Nathaniel Bandy's probably writing the scrite or playing mario games for 'avoiding death in every mario game' ''I'm allergic to DEATH. So today I am gonna try to beat all of the mario games WITHOUT DYING. If I die, I have to start that game all over again. Now let's get into it.'' -says Nathaniel Bandy
Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020 still beats all of those by a good 114 days. It's called the COVID strategy. All you gotta do is cause a pandemic which will then result in the timer's start getting delayed by exactly 364 days, which is enough to push the total time taken to reach death into the negatives.
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These goombas are outta control
Real
yes
G00MBA
LETS GO
i think instead of u resetting in the lost levels u should of just ignored the paratroopa and got the poison mushroom
We gotta get revenge. How fast can you *take* a life in every Mario game?
You mean how fast you can *murder* in every Mario game
@@IAmAbsoluteLAD Yes basically.
All for it
Let’s roll
@@Introbulusor the opposite, how fast can you kill a enemy in every mario game?
These goombas deserve a promotion for being able to speedrun killing Mario
a raise? but they're the masterminds...
Nice to see the Goomba getting a spotlight in one of these videos.
I instinctively started reading this in the Hotel Mario voice lol
People often point out that Bowser goes way too easy on Mario, sending pathetic goombas to kill him and making the lava pits too small. But in the majority of timelines Mario dies and never faces bowser.
Finally, Bowser's army is doing their job.
FINALLY
Yes ❤
Its funny how you somehow gained a life instead of losing one in Mario World
1:34 is pure reflex for us all
0:12 I know someone who has lost more lives...
the Geometry Dash Icon
I knew I'll find a comment like that
No the stick man on the road signs
@@VERYCOOLMONKEYVRhes technically not shown dying
Mario games always seem so simple and easy and then you die to the first goomba
Over time I've come to appreciate just how much faster it is to get to the action (and your first death) in older games
How fast can you touch Zelda in every Zelda game?
Link’s Awakening moment
Never, because Zelda isn't real.
Jfc the drowning deaths are actually pretty nutty to see in the kid friendly mario series. Held nothing back with the animations, gruesome.
How quickly can you touch A Friend in every Mario?
How quickly can you touch Authority in every Kirby?
How quickly can you touch Air in every Metroid game?
Technically, Samus is most likely always touching air, as long as her suit is working.
What friends are in Mario 1?
You should try some of these challenges with Kirby games! Like getting a life and whatnot
bro getting a life in kirby is so easy
actually wait it depends on which game your playing
if ur playing like magalor epilogue or return to dream land then that does not apply
Is it really losing a life when you know exactly where it was thrown away
I think you can lose a life faster in SM 64 by going to a wall, make a triple jump into it, wall jump and do a ground pound at the peak of the jump, that way you take fall damage. Repeat four times and you are dead in the castle grounds.
I too am going to lose a life to the Super Mario RPG remake. So hyped for it!
0:04 Goomba
goomba
SNES
Fun fact to see this video, Death% is one of the most common alternate speedruns around!
You should do "how long does it take to max out your wallet in every Zelda game." That one would be pretty long, but it could be fun.
That sliding guy in Super Mario World was my mortal enemy as a child. Lost so many lives to it.
"you dare bring light into my lair!? You must die!" - ganon, link: the faces of evil.
Sorry to inform you, but that enemy in galaxy 2 at 4:08 is not a goomba. It's a Galoomba, they're different.
If we're being nitpicky then at 1:18 that's technically a Goombo, which is a variation of the Goomba, but not an actual Goomba itself!
Now after touching Death, comes Money!!!
0:40 All we had to do is jump to that damn cupa, mario
1:33 when muscle memory kicks in
I travel back to 1994 after the Mario movie already exists. I explain to people that in the future year 2023 on the internet (what is the internet???) there is a channel, like a videocassette, but you don't have to leave home, like watching TV, but videocassette, but without leaving home.
There's a channel that makes funny videos about Mario. Yes, this is the future. And that humanity is dying out because you, which means us, so we didn't listen to the scientists back then. Well I did and do, but I'm not the mass of people. Somehow that also fits the morbid theme of the video. The end is near.
once mario wonder comes out, I hope you make a compilation of how fast you can do all these things in that game!
Boy oh boy, your videos literally are to die for (RIP Mario)
3:52 That's one spicy meatball-a.
Super Mario Bros 2 is so hard that even deliberately killing yourself to the first Koopa takes skill.
Should I count this as touching Ghost (since you die) or touching Ground (because you get buried)?
Either way, that's 5 types touched, 13 types left!
I think this should count for Ghost since you're technically touching Ground whenever you're... well, Grounded.
If that's not enough for Ground though, then Ground could be an underground level or something
I love that you showed multiple options for this one, showing which method would actually be faster between a couple initial ideas.
0:30 Other Than The First Motobug In Sonic 1
Go touch grass! -> Touches grass
Drink some water. -> Jumps into water
Get a life! -> Literally gets a life
??? -> Loses a life
... I wonder what the incentive might've been this time.
Probably a statement that'd get a comment reported quite a bit...
Something whose abbreviation rhymes with Guilty Gear's Ky Kiske, that's for sure
Good job, mate. I am thoroughly impressed.
You forgot super Luigi U, Wrecking crew, Donkey Kong, Mario Bros. (Arcade) and Mario’s Time Machine what a shame. 💀
Could easily cut 30s out of Mario 64. You can get ontop of the castle early without the cannon and there's a small area you can ledge grab that'll insta kill Mario. Or if you want to do glitchless (Getting on top of the castle I would consider "tech" not a glitch, the same way you claimed lakitu skip is a speedrun strat) you can triple jump wall kick ground pound off the tower on top of the castle for fall damage
Detective: All right… where did all of these 11 dead bodies come from?
Goomba: 😰
So basically this is Mario being Kenny from South Park for 5:26 minutes
I wonder where Hotel Mario would be on this list.
Touching money could be another challenge you can do in these games :) Also jeez for being the easiest enemy Goomba’s are also apparently the deadliest
complete mario without touching goomba
1:32
XD when you fail so hard at losing a life you gain one instead
Mario trying to kill himself non-stop is something I never thought I would see
idk about saying death is the greatest fear in humanity, that goomba from the orginal mario bros movie is pretty scary
Jorts teaching eveyrone.... Goomba= serial killer
speaking about instant death, i love it when big bass fish in smb3 eating me up😅 the drawn sprite itself just looks so socky
Thanks for this, because of your video I decided to buy Super Mario Land instead of my originally planned Mario Galaxy
4:35 smh didnt spinpound roll cancel to land on the guard rail and buffer a spin pound to quickly jump into the pit.
Yeah can't believe he didn't do that it wouldve been a whole 2 seconds faster and its only way harder
*TOUCH AIR IN EVERY MARIO GAME.*
Oh god getting the bold text right took 4 edits I’m kinda dumb
Mario hasn’t took as much pain as the average 3 year old that plays roblox
0:34 “this enemy has claimed more lives than anything else ever”
Spike from geometry dash: bruh
Now you just need to touch life *get a 1-up*
I'd be curious how long it takes to touch death in other Mario RPG series (Paper Mario, Mario and Luigi, Mario + Rabbids)
the goombas are literally the embodiment of death
For this particular challenge, it would be interesting to include donkey kong and mario bros.
I like how we've just completely given up on these being actual optimal numbers.
In SM64, I'm sure it's pretty fast to climb up the castle roof on the right and die using the out-of-bounds ledge grab in the very corner.
Might just be fastest to climb up a tree, handstand, jump, take fall damage, repeat a few times.
It’s funny, whenever I try to avoid the paratroopas, they kill me, but when you try to hit them, they kill you.
j0rts is trying to discover the true elements and become the real-life avatar by throwing everything at the wall and seeing what sticks.
I love this type of videos
I think I might know two more video game characters that I have felt more pain and dad then Mario starting off with the walnut from plants versus zombies and probably the one video game character who has lost the most lives, and there has been most fails henry stick man from the Henry Stickman collection 0:28
3:17 it’s because mushrooms in the Mario series when they’re not items are depicted as bouncy
You forgot one more person who suffered more deaths than mario. The geometry dash cube
instead of phycopathic murduring gumbas it should be phycopathic suicidic mario
SMB-Those damn cheep-cheeps on the bridge can still get me.
SMB2-i still miss jumps in 5-1.
SMB3-Big Bass will occasionally eat me.
SMW-Reznors!!! >:\/
YI-Goonie Bird Flight. 😑
Now you must touched quicksand
I'm gonna say how fast can you spit out things in every Kirby game
From get a life to lose a life. Humanity has come so far
Wouldn't it be faster to clip out of bounds in the sm64 castle courtyard? (Maneuver to top right area of caste, hang off ledge behind wall, lift yourself back up from hanging, die instantly?) The trick can be pretty tricky to pull off, though.
Or are glitches/exploits not allowed?
you dare challenge me? because i bet i can dye faster with my incompatence at platefoirmers :)
thx for testing the gardrails now i know not to jump off a cliff😁
SOOOOOOO now Nathaniel Bandy's probably writing the scrite or playing mario games for 'avoiding death in every mario game'
''I'm allergic to DEATH. So today I am gonna try to beat all of the mario games WITHOUT DYING.
If I die, I have to start that game all over again.
Now let's get into it.''
-says Nathaniel Bandy
Never realized mario games were so deadly good
How fast can you get a sword in every zelda game just a thought...
Alr fine you’ve done air,fire,grass,water,life and death
But now ya gotta touch some rock ,some stone ,some 🪨
Assorted goops is the new exotic butters.
Im so glad someone else considers Bowser's Fury to be an actual Mario game
One of my friends was trying to do this challenge, they never told me how fast it took them though. ☹️
Cool but how fast you can open/close a door in every Mario game (INCLUDING Hotel Mario)
I thought yoshi had the most deaths
How about: How fast can you touch Peach in every Mario game?
It’s your falt for jumping over the gar-rails.
For Mario RPG, would it be faster to skip over all the initial Terrapins and let the battle against the 4 wear you down more quickly?
Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games Tokyo 2020 still beats all of those by a good 114 days. It's called the COVID strategy. All you gotta do is cause a pandemic which will then result in the timer's start getting delayed by exactly 364 days, which is enough to push the total time taken to reach death into the negatives.
Well, maybe the goombas were the biggest fear after all
The Goomba be like: maybe I am a challenge
What is the deadliest enemy when it comes to Mario games?
I can’t think about someone with more deaths then Mario!
*bathroom sign man*
In SM64, wouldn't it be faster to do a LBLJ, enter Bowser 1 and jump into the void ?
Well it requires an LBLJ lol
Touch Fire in every Zelda game
This is the one thing you’re good at.
It's kind of surprising that Super Mario RPG is third to last compared to both Galaxy games and not just by some slim chance but by 20 seconds.
Mario trying to become pro speedrunner by speedrunning Death%. He's going to make it big one day
like you said in the intro: GOOMBA
another j0rts classic
now legend of zelda
please do mario wonder and re-upload this