I'm Breaking No Contact
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- Опубліковано 15 жов 2024
- I want to break no contact! Have you decided to break no contact and reach out to your ex? It could be a mistake.
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Sharing this hoping you guys feel better. I had a terrible break-up few years ago, my ex, as I concern now, has kind of avoidant attachment style. When he sensed a problem, he shut down his emotion and cut contact with everyone. So back then, when things were tensed between us, he decided to break up out of the blue. He even went further as blocking me on all social media and such. So I just left him alone, it was terrible, 10/10 difficulty for me. Guess what? Seven months later coming back asking me to get back together. I by that time decided that I did not want him anymore because the relationship was unhealthy and also personal reasons. And just like Craig pointing out in his previous videos, when I acted like that he was suddenly get all the passion and interest back and kept chasing me. Now it's been more than 3 years and just a while ago I heard from a mutual close friend that he still wants me and think I'm the best he could get, he even rejected some girls that are interested in him. So, long story short, if they did really love you, they will think of you, they will contact you. Be confident, be strong, act like you are the best and they will treat you as such. Even if you don't get the relationship back, you will end up getting a better one.
Don't do it! Their emotions were so strong that they blocked us, contacting just makes it worse. They will calm down, it may take a really long time for those guys but they will. Be strong, friend.
It’s so difficult when an avoidant shuts down. So much more space and time is required- possibly forever. Dealing with same.
Val Fjwr thanks, very encouraging for me (heart)
Val Fjwr Great story ..gives me hope. I have acted like am idiot but not any more!
My Therapy omg sounds so familiar. ..
I seen my ex after 5 month of no contact. She dumped me like I was nothing I ran into her in the supermarket on Saturday and we was face to face we both was smiling ,we talked and she told me she miss me every day.we even kissed .we went to breakfast the next morning and now we are working on getting back together. We even had sex and it was crazy like we was teenagers lol.im happy but I'm still going to work on me I lost over 50lbs and hitting the gym she couldn't stop looking at me shes calling me like crazy now and I'm loving it.keep doing the work people stay working on making a better you .and im still going to be listening to coach Kenneth for ever.
10/10. It's been 2.5 months and she left for someone else (not sure if it's a guy or a girl. or both.) I was weak, needy, clingy, always trying to make her happy and fix things, didn't listen, anxiety all the time, got depressed and couldn't focus anymore... the whole nine yards. I pushed her right into someone else's arms. I didn't even realize what I was doing half of the time. I am haunted by my former self and I am constantly bargaining and beating myself up over my behavior.
I really think we could have something strong if she wanted to work on things but I am terrified she's gone for good and won't look back. Craig told me he'd be surprised if she DIDN'T come back within 4-6 months (I hope you're right, Craig!) and I am clinging to that in the back of my mind, but I am also scared that I am just setting myself up for failure.
It super sucks. I blew her phone up a day or two after she left and I was putting the blame on her (I mean she did leave for someone else) and I am afraid that I ruined my chances.
I am slowly starting to put myself back together. Looking into different schools, trying to eat healthier, listening to meditation to calm my anxiety, reconnecting with old friends, repairing relationships with other friends and family, etc. I have learned a lot about myself. I'm not 100% a new person yet but I am getting there. I only wish that she could some day see.
I know that I need to be the star of my own movie, but... I thought I had that someone. And I hate myself for behaving the way I did. Trying to be positive and focus on what I want.
Let's pray for each other and be strong for each other, guys. We'll all get through this wether they come back or not.
updates?
How are u doing now?
buchanan012 did she come back?
Update
No update. Sometimes you don't end up getting what you want in life.
This guy is amazing. How he describes the feelings as being like a experiencing a death and how your body goes through the anxiety symptoms because you have lost a connection is so true!
Amen. Its like you have to learn how to live all over again.
Nothing like coming to a no contact video and 95% of people post that they never hear or get back with their ex.
Never ever break no contact, it’s not worth it!
It really isn't! You ALWAYS ends up heartbroken
Don’t break no contact! I had broken no contact with my on again off again former partner. Geeting him back was the easy part. But little did I know, he became accustomed to it. You see, he was conditioned to the breaking up and making up pattern that he became disrespectful many times over. He was conditioned that I would stay away for a few weeks and then try to get him back again.He had no incentive to respect me anymore. He even told me, after each time we broke up, I would just wait for you to pop up again. I am just done now. No more! I wish you all luck!
CozBlueOcean any updates?
.Update?
Coach Craig, I live right now day to day with the support from you and your team via UA-cam. These videos are my survival guide at the moment. I needed to hear the candid in this particular video. It was hard to hear, but I needed to listen to your advisement to keep myself grounded. I want to break no contact so bad, but you are right and are helping keep me grounded. I miss my ex-boyfriend so much. Breakups hurt. 😥
oh man, I'm on the low point of my life. my anxiety doesn't let me sleep at night and I keep having bad thoughts. I am so emotionally dependent on her, I don't really have friends but her. and now everything is falling apart. I'm following your advice but it is really difficult especially because I know she will never message me again. and I keep watching a movie of our relationship in my mind every single second, rehearsing what I could have said or done. and it hurts man... never felt this before
Gabriel Galante thank you for sharing, any update on your life as of today?
terrinson hopefully better :/ I feel for em.
Feeling exactly the same here! No friends and totally dependent on her! This videos give me Hope, not for reconciliation really but for healing
Craig, having this playlist is amazing! Even though I know I need to give them space, anxiety nags at me in the morning and tells me to talk to them. I go to this to soothe my anxiety if I break no contact and have no discipline or self control. I would have probably texted my ex and created more damage had I texted him so thank you
Craig, just want to say I appreciate all your work on relationships and breakups. You truly are great at what you do.
To everyone watching these videos, I broke NC after about 40 days and got no response. It was heart breaking and I totally wish I never did it haha. On the other hand it was a blessing because it gave me the closure I needed to totally do NC properly for me and not to win her back. I look at things differently now with a mindset that she is gone and that I have to work on me for me. I've started dating, I'm In the best physical shape I've ever been in and worked on my relationships with my close friends and family. I guess I kind of owe my ex a bit, as the breakup can be a blessing for personal growth and happiness.
Everyday you get stronger! Believe in NC people.
What was the reason why the two of you broke up? Its a case to case basis
For God sake don't do it! I broke no contact with my ex. Because my ex is lovely kind caring woman I thought she would be receptive hearing from me. Boy was I wrong. All I did was make her feel guilty and cause more pain. I initially reached out for her to collect her stuff and for me to ask what ultimately turned her off. I was being very kind and caring in my approach as well. I didn't beg or plead or ask for another chance either. What I've learned is if you're ex is the best person on the planet you don't want to interupt her healing. The words being in relief and healing where used from her. Don't make my mistake and break no contact. It will just make your situation worse.
Hi coach. NC for me is hard in the beginning cause feel that anxiety. But what I do is keep myself busy by exercising and watch your videos that give me strength when feeling weak.
Everyone sounds like a junkie- day 5, day 12. And when NC is broken, it’s a setback to progress! It is hard! I get it. I have inconsistently stuck to NC for a month and now that it’s Christmas Eve, it’s even harder.
Stacey Swope lol...really does
Lol a junky less or more
How did things turn out Stacey?
that's because technically we all are junkies... the love chemicals released by the brain and body are taken away and the stress chemicals are heightened.... so yeah, technically we are all going through extreme withdrawals
11 out of 10. Broken a Lot of times. Each one worse than the last. DON'T DO IT! You only get your heart broken even more!!!
Did your ex ever reach put after breaking no contact
I'd say it's about 7/10 for me. Everyday, every couple of hours I want to break it
For me, one moment is like 'no contact' , it is the right decision, yes I should continue it while other moment, I am like is it the right decision, what if they think i dont care.My mind is constantly fluctuating. It would reach 5 at time to more than 10 at other time.
Update?
First few days were really tough, but I'm fine now with it. I feel I have learnt about myself. Worst part now is the feeling of no hope of them reaching out.
Big Dave exactly how i feel ):
I think just about all of us feel hopeless. But I truly believe in most cases an ex revisits the idea of getting back with us. You just have to know how to get that little spark lit.
My ex said hi lol just Hi after I went NC for a week. We talked briefly just how are you etc and I wanted to ask her out because I knew it was her indirect/direct way of reaching out but I was upset all she said was hi and didn’t ask me so I didn’t and I regret it :(. I asked her a week later after NC and she said yeah maybe, which is good because she would have said probably not or I don’t think so if she didn’t do I’m hoping she does. Really wish I would have asked when she said hi but I wanted to seem like idc and now I regret it so bad.
@@yozefl434 my ex reached out in 2 weeks and we did some small talk and he ended the convo (stopped replying) and it never happened again. Not sure if it's my place to reach him out again or still stay in NC.
@@pvz0484 well I got over that one and then fell in love frfr in 2020 and it’s still fucked me up inside how that one went
Hi Craig you have become my best friend, ever since i broke up with my fiance 41 days ago(today), we where together for 4 years and have a beautiful 17 month old baby boy. The reason why she left me was because she grew tired of my inability to control my emotions due to anxiety . I went to therapy but it was futile, your videos have help me grow and understand with insight. I will be scheduling a skype with you, but first im trying to sell my tv to get some money to pay for the session as i also lost my job through this whole process. Thanks again hopefully you can help me recover the love of my life, my queen.
Hi George, thank you for the kind words. Keep watching the videos. I have almost 300! While you are saving up you have PLENTY of great content to keep you focused and working hard :)
NC is the hardest thing on earth. That is until you you realize you were behaving like a lunatic. That embarrassment paired with understanding your anxiety makes NC easy. It's the only option for another chance.
Agreed! It gives you perspective of how batshit crazy we all acted lol. This method definitely works and helps us all improve ourselves
Its been 3 months since she left, we were together 2 1/2 years. The no-contact things was so hard, most days 10 for 10. Some days now it still comes up like my mind tries to trick me and get me to do some kind of reach out. So tonight I watch this video and a few more of yours, you honestly have helped me and saved my sanity many, many days now. I still hate it and hurt everyday but it's getting better I think. I want to move on but i'ts been really crippling. I wish I could work with you Craig, even just one phone call. But I am disabled and my income really dosnt allow it.
I've been broken up with my ex for about 2 1/2 months now and any time we've initiated No Contact it has felt unbearable. You're obligated to focus on the void they leave behind.. and the separation anxiety consumes you. My ex reached out the first time, and I broke no contact the other 2 times even if it was just to see how they're doing. We are currently in no contact again and the only thing keeping me from breaking it is knowing they're in a new relationship which they had been keeping a secret from me. At this point no contact still sucks and I miss my ex terribly but I'd feel pathetic reaching out. If I know my ex, which I do they will reach out even if they're seeing someone else.. more videos on how to handle a situation like this would be greatly appreciated!!
10/10. I just want this feeling to go away 😫💔
did it?
7 weeks now since I've reached out, 5 weeks since she has. Thing is our last conversation went well, very well. Or at least so I thought it did. I'm smiling, she's smiling. I'm laughing, she's laughing. We talked for about an hour or so and we had a great time. It ended with her saying that she can't wait to see me again when she has the time. Again, that was 5 weeks ago now and she's online more than I am. I know I'm not a priority for her and so I know I can't go back to chasing her. This really sucks even though I've been seeing others.
Craig no contact for me has been like sitting through a tooth extraction without Novocain. It’s been two weeks since our last interaction and I went through the holidays without contact and that was BRUTAL especially since our 3 year anniversary would have been December 27. I go back and forth between hope and no hope and I am afraid of the longer this goes on the further away she gets I feel like I should be fighting for her. I have the hardest time on the weekends and tonight I have captain and coke keeping me company.
oh my god, this is literally the story of my life. the way you're struggling, I resonate with it SO much.
How are you now?
@@pvz0484 I couldn’t be better, filling that void wasn’t easy but going through Craig’s videos and workbooks taught me a lot about attachment styles and I’m in a better place in life then I was at any point in the past and will not settle.
Super happy for you
PLEASS, PLEASE Everyone listen to what Dr. Craig is saying here. First hand experience. The pain of No contact is nothing compared to an Order of Protection. Courts don't care. Dr. Craig does. Good luck to all
James Rounds yes nothing says "I love you" like a restraining order!!
David U 😂
What if your ex wants to speak to you but is scared of your reaction when she gets back in touch? So you both wanna talk but both not reaching out...
I am thinking the same thing. Except my ex did reach out once 2 weeks after the breakup for small talk and then never again. I don't know what to do honestly.
my no contact experience was a 10 it was brutal, I obsessed 24 7! I wanted to scream, I sat through the feelings there's no other way, it's been 3 months, she texted on my birthday I sat there for 3 hours before I texted back to say thanks, that's it. after all is said and done, I know I walked away with dignity, and that is very important to me, I had an email and Skype session , thanks coach your truly awesome, I see the light at the end of the tunnel. if she never contacts me ill be fine , if she does she better have a good story to tell, good luck to you all
David Santiago any updates.
David Santiago did she text again?
It's been almost 3 months since my girlfriend left me for another man I'm a auto mechanic and I do like to fix things we were living together up till 2 yrs ago we had a blowout argument she stopped contributing towards the household expenses she purchased a end and a middle row house I was against it from the start so for the last 2 yrs I gave her the money for the taxes ( it's 2 sets of taxes because it's listed as 2 properties) anyway she owns it and she'd have to take a mortgage out to fix it in a timely fashion the whole inside needs to be remodeled with wiring, outlets, insulation etc the outside of the place needs to get siding on it to insure the house ( there's shingles's on it for siding) no insurance company would even insure the place. She still had the key for the house where she resided with me at the time I asked her numerous times for a key for the house she purchased and all she did was give me excuses that would develop into another argument, she also has 2 kids from a broken marriage ( guy left her for another woman) the oldest is 21 and the youngest is 15 and they're both girls, last yr after school let out the youngest ran away my girlfriend called me I was by her side in minutes to help locate the kid the youngest was seeing a therapist I think a lot of the problem was my girlfriend wouldn't stick to any disciplinary action that the child required and let's her do anything she wants the older daughter is in college ( thank God) but basically my ex is showing the younger daughter that it's ok to go from one relationship to another, the older daughter knows this behavior is wrong and it's not going to end well ( for her mother her words) the older one told me to try to hold on from moving on and I am it just eats away at me she did this I was going to get her a ring this yr for Valentine's Day I don't think so now we were together for 7 yrs. also she did this before that's y I didn't get her a ring then it was almost 3 yrs since the last incident. I left her a way to contact me because I still have her SUV that I was going to fix but didn't after she did this I told her oldest daughter the only way I'd put it back together if me and her mom got back together and work past this. She reached out to me this morning and we're supposed to meet on Saturday for a coffee I'll be surprised if she shows up for one and if she does I'd really like for us to get back together I was married once to I don't want another hole in my life we're both in our 40's And I helped raise her kids like they were mine too. My ex says I was mean to the youngest I never laid a finger on her I'd just yell at her to go to her room if she did wrong. Any advice would be appreciated thanks in advance reply soon please I'm on limited time before we meet again
This is one of the best videos I've seen so far, will show this to anyone else I know who's going through a break up
The first email was similar to my story how can you forget about me lol (not a good sign) especially with the high anxious months ago. However, now I have been working on myself. I rate my anxiety then on a score of 1 to 10 it was a 10 for me the way I behaved. Thanks Coach Craig for another valuable video!!!!!! Folks please sign up for his coaching.
Hey coach to me it is like a 9-10. But you hammered the no contact rule in my head so much that it seems now like a 2-10. Thank you. It has been now a month and three weeks. And I am happy with the idea that I'm ok even if it doesn't work out. I am more happy with the idea of fulfilling my life towards working on myself. Thank you.
This is officially day #1. Sent a civil positive text to her yesterday about letting her have the healthy time and space she needed, wished her the best in everything, and told her i loved her. Each day should get a little easier
No contact is simply awful, nothing else has worked so I guess have to try this. The pain is real and it’s intense.
I had a coaching session with Craig today very eye-opening.
NPC #7125366 what advice did he give you
How are you now?
Any update
updateee
my chances are probably ruined. I accept her as a friend and truly have compassion for a woman that has had a hard lot in life. I may break no contact, but not to get her back
No contact is hell for me. 10 out of 10. I work with my ex. So I'm always reminded of her. I stopped texting and calling her. When I pass her by at work and we make eye contact. I smile and ask how she is. Have a short conversation mostly about work then move on. Do you think this is the right approach?
enslaved1s I’m in a very similar senario.. I’m aware that this comment was a while ago but what would you suggest
There’s nothing you can really do if you work together I wouldn’t completely ignor them just make small talk when appropriate and keep moving forward
No contact has been very, very tough on me. It's been a mixed level of difficulty. Some day it's a 5, then the next day the difficulty would jump to a 10. I was so close to breaking it yesterday, literally seconds away from reaching my phone ugh... Then I got myself together and called my friend instead and talked to her about it. She reminded me that my ex dumped me, she needs to reach out to me, not me to her.
Good job keeping self control! I like that you called a friend instead. I wish I had mentioned that in the video :)
Coach Craig Kenneth for me is extremely difficult 1 my anxiety is easily 7,8 at times and we have a son together which she did not show up to check on for 13 days. My son was devastated he is 3. I can't work. When she did I tried to talk some senses to her head but nothing even thou she indirectly called a couple times. I don't know what to do no contact have a son together and having all the responsibility up to me.
That sounds incredibly overwhelming. She is acting incredibly selfish! She doesn't even seem to be thinking about your son! Awful...
Thanks Coach I watch all your videos they help me understand a lot about myself but I feel helpless. I feel she is playing a lot of games. And I need to protect my son. I tried no contact but I don't even know if is worthy.
Its driving me crazy and I'm really having a hard time. 10/10 and its starting to affect me in every way again. It's been 7 months now!
update ?
no contact was hard at first but im at 2 months now and i feel like i can keep this going forever, the only problem is that i am sad that she hasnt reached out and feel like she never will and nothing will change with me and her
AlexandruP any update
.update?
I'm not truly in no contact as my breakup is a special situation and after discussing with Margaret and a local therapist, we have agreed to be friends. I am of course struggling with how to do that but at this point I am doing my best to not rech out to him, just respond when he reached out to me which he has been doing every day or so. But not reaching out to him to say good morning, good night, how was your day, look at this cool thing I found that I want yo share with you... it is the hardest thing I have ever done. I'm 49 and have bee divorced twice, both times I left. This is really the first time someone broke up with me and it was really due to situations outside our relationship which kills me. The obsessive thoughts are making me crazy. Patience has never been one of my virtues and I always want to have a plan, even though I anticipate having to tweak it because of course, life happens. But this waiting for my ex to reach out is the worst pain in the world. The uncertainty, being powerless to help or make things change is maddening. But, I need to respect his wishes, give him room to miss me and move on with my life as best I can while I hope he comes back. God is it hard.
My ex reached out the very next day. She wanted space and I started begging and pleading. She wouldn't budge but then this corona virus crisis happened and I told her let's just get through this crisis and we'll deal with the break up later. She sorta agreed but you can see her resistance. Later that night I sent her a text and told her after thinking about it about I agree with her, we need time. She was upset, said "no problem, one minute I'm like this and the next minute I'm like that"...I went into no contact and the next day she sent me a text..." everytime I look at these pics I get so sad". Because the wknd that just passed we had a romantic getaway. I didnt respond, the next day she text me, "how quickly u go from one extreme to the next, copy"...I replied " hey u gm", she replied yeah gm....I didnt text back and then later that afternoon she sent me a song she had dedicated to me earlier in the relationship, I wasnt sure how to respond so I didnt. The next day we didnt text each other but then I remembered I had ordered her some cleaning supplies amid the virus and text her, "gm, i ordered these and sent some to u and my baby mother, it should arrive today, stay safe" she replied "gm, thank you, same to you stay safe", I asked her how she's holding up and she said regular, ok I guess, I said cool, she said you?, I told her I was ok, reading alot, lil scared for my kids, she said she was scared too, I asked if she sent me a song, she said yes and I said thank you, and she replied "sure". When she recieved her package she text me she received it and thanked me again. After a couple hrs I replied "np"....what should I do at this point? Please help....
I got something from your story,ignore them ,you will enjoy...
Are you the brother of Coach Corey Wayne? You talk in the same way, same expressions... both great.
David Valle I agree, yep, and both are great.
She is avoidant and I did the needy anxious thing bad on her for weeks.. I went no contact and actually started feeling good about myself. And she reached out the first day! But it's only the beginning. I know I have a long way to go, but I'm not going to work too hard on it.
Good days 4/10. Bad days 10/10 so i binge watch videos
In so bad it's been a week Since the break up and I have only been able to go one day without texting him. I found you and Margaret at day three. All your advice has really helped and when I'm struggling I try to just watch another video to keep me busy..I have not been mean to my ex I have been very kind. He is bipolar and we had been talking about his meds needing some adjusting. At the same time we were talking about moving in together..I think he just got overwhelmed and shut down...He reads everything I send him but never replied unless it's to tell me to slow down..that I will be ok...I'm so confused..we were engaged to be married in May 2021.
Currently it’s an 8/10. Before it was 10/10. But it’s been 3 weeks since we broke up and I’ve just been binge watching these videos for comfort and also realizing that I shouldn’t be the one fixing the relationship. Ofc I miss him but the urge to text him doesn’t happen much anymore. It’s just me thinking about him and missing him
Advice on a situation when you work with your ex, and you have to see them and work with the everyday.
Back to Day 1! Ugh!!! I am so frustrated for breaking NC. My grandmother passed two days ago and I broke down and let my anxiety take over! I broke the news to her and got...exactly a cold response. Stupid me for breaking NC!
10/10 no contact is heartbreaking
So here's the deal, folks. Let me save you some time... Both people taking the same advice - nobody contacts anybody and you never speak again. The end.
This no contact rule is hard, but she continued to reach out, and we had good conversations, it’s been about a week now and I haven’t heard from her.... so I started all over again.... I listen to Craig EVERYDAY! I do the workbooks EVERYDAY, some days she doesn’t cross my mind as often some days it’s more than 1000x’s,.... I was with here for 7 years! One day she’ll return, in the meantime I’m working on myself, I got Craig, Margaret, my therapist 2x’s a week... yeah I have issues! Lol, but I’m doing all the right things! Thanks Craig, glad I found you! And when it works out (either-way) I’ll be hitting you up for a celebration!
update?
2 years divorced now and still obsessing and hurting like crazy!?
Almost 2 weeks NC and now I'm like "whatever" about my ex coming back. I showed her I dont need her when she broke up with me. Eventually the tide will turn and she will begin to feel the separation anxiety from me
Unannounced visitors and unwanted gifts. Stalker like behavior
10/10. I keep breaking it...
No contact is 10 out 10 for me. Very tough
It's been 2 months and 1 day since he broke up with me. Immediately after our break up conversation, I went into no contact and he went back on Match where I met him. We were only together for almost 2 months but it got really serious and intense really fast. He was on Match 24/7 for about 2weeks after our break up and then all of a sudden, his profile became inactive, I am assuming he met someone and they're now dating....No contact doesn't matter to people on dating sites especially when they can chat with hundreds of other possibilities...
Agreed. They'll just keep meeting new people to distract themselves. Keeps them from realizing how unhappy they are
HELP! After 4 days of no contact my ex has reached out ot me! She has said "Hey how have you been?" I am going to wait to reply, but any suggestions on what I should say?
She has an anxious attachment type, and I broke up with her. I asked her to give us another chance, but she refused. I have been working on myself and implimented No Contact before before she hunted me down at the university and began to orbit me during my Clubs bake sale. I was having fun and being my happy social self.
HELP!
I'd love to be able to work with you Craig but unfortunately, I don't have the funds for the email, let alone the coaching.
After 26 days I broke no contact by accidentally opening a snapchat-I was still subscribed then I felt the need to message and explain it and she blocked me. On the upside, considering how stupid I felt after it happened I moved into a great state of detachment and I've go that going with me at least.
The no contact is even harder when your ex is seeing someone that she dumped you for but you know she still loves you. It's like waiting for her to get back to you when she's done fkn this punk. Hopefully I'll have moved on when she wakes up.
@@axelbriggjern3534 Thx. Have not heard from her since a post-breakup argument we had in december. Don't think she's coming back anytime soon but I'm ok with that now. Not even sure she'd get a text back from me if she did to tell you the truth. I've turned this situation into a plenty of fish kinda thing so we'll see what's next for me.
Im so close to doing it!! 4 months since break up,ive broken it once we had a civil conversation then nothing since its killing me! Feels like nothing is happening
Remember this: breaking no contact does nothing. Absolutely nothing. Bad idea
I suck at no contact! 10 out of 10 for difficulty for sure. Still trying to master it and I’ve been divorced for 2.5 years now!!!
It is difficult, but I do feel more in control!
No contact is absolute complete hell, but if being arrested for showing up to the house and ruining chances then what choice do ya have? And if after sending an email and five text are are being ignored then what is the point of sending more? I have used journal therapy and real therapy to help me. I absolutely agree that getting advice from friends and family is an over all bad idea. Sometimes just making the best of your life and suffering is the only choice. And taking some comfort that there are some good videos to watch.
18 weeks from my break up, I’m having hard time with no contact I miss her every day. So I always did the chasing every time we broke up now I’m doing things diferente I’m not chasing anymore I think she’s seeing someone else now she doesn’t care if I’m dead or alive at this point Ps. Idk why I still want her she cheated several times if anyone can relay please let’s cheer up together I always want to give up.
I’d say I’m a 5/10. My relationship ended 7 months ago, and been in contact for 5. I have enough knowledge to know it’s not right and will destroy all the work I’ve done, but that fairytale we create in our heads on how maybe if we reach out is strong.
I love this video Craig so keep making more videos like these
tough brother really tough. But I know this is the only way to get back to being me. Crazy thing is I know her so well. She's thinking the same way.
The way I see it is, if this breakup was years ago when there were no cell phones no way to text would you actually call this persons house out of the blue months later and leave a voice message on their answering machine? You wouldn’t! So don’t be tempted to text just because it’s so easy to make contact.
Omg 😮 so true, I’m having crying moments and can’t sleep well! Damn chemicals in my body 😆but coach you humorist style make me smile 😃 if I can afford you, I’d pay You. Your sessions are so expensive but for what I’ve been listening from most of the clips you are by far the best couch in UA-cam! No contact no reaching out well said . I’m going to adopt a cat instead 😂 and talk to it!
"i would be standing in front of a moving bus" HAHA lmao that killed me
I did the begging, pleading and even went to her work, just because it was my birthday and she told me before that she would see me, turns out that makes her more angry. 😢
hi Craig , i watch your videos about no contact and other videos and i think they are great , I have no prob with understanding the `no contact ` and the exciety that comes with it , you explain really well what happens to a person who has been dumped ,, but what i interested in, is know how the person who dumps you feels , like for instance are they sleeping well? or are they feeling up them self ? or do they feel some form of exzaety too after all they are separating too right? ,,, sorry cant spell well :) thank you for your answer Sani
If you dumped someone else in the past...you know what it feels like.
Hi Craig , you re my hero""" so glad I found ur videos the day My boyfriend broke up with me. I cried my eyes out. I sent you an email I hope. you can read it,,, my boyfriend of 3 months broke up with me saying "he doesn't have time for this " and he was getting so cold few weeks ago". Also I found out he was trying to date another girl. He called me Saturday saying that he can't do it for million reasons. I told him, ok I agree I know u re not interest in me anymore...anyhow I'm doing the no contact and is killing me.....I know is only 3 months but it was a wonderful relashiinship...I don't know if my situation is hopeless..... And doing the no contact thing won't work...I really miss him
My Therapy I know. I think he is a player. I think he used me. Wish I could forget about him. I think I was way too nice. Never got mad if he couldn't make it to our date, I was always understanding he was busy. I feel so stupid :(.
Yeah. I think I was way too nice, super understanding , and he took me for granted ...I don't think he was seeing his ex wife. I think he was still looking for other dates and he had me as a back up. :( It feels awful bc I thought I was a good girlfriend ...ugh I feel so stupid. Then when finally we set a date (last Saturday ) he told me that he has to think about the relashiinship , bc his kids schedule is crazy, he got s new positions at work and also I live 40 away from him, so for him is way to much and then he said, well, I don't think I can do it. I need to think about it. I only put my big pants and even I was hurting I told him, I agree, I think u re not interest in me anymore and a relashiinship works when the 2 persons works on it not one and I think I was very understanding and patient....anyhow that was the last time I talked to him, I didn't text him or call him,m I know I should be glad is over, but is not that easy :(. I was so excited shirt this because we had such a great time together. Even for Christmas we had a blast we exchange gifts I made dinner for him,,,I don't know what did I do wrong :( maybe "way too understanding"
Hey Coach Craig Kenneth, your advice is really good advice. I also like the way you lead everything back to anxiety. Also getting that its important to follow no contact. But what about living together? Surely, i could constantly ignore him, but that wouldn't feel mature at all..
It's the worst, a 10. I just listened to a song about her and burst into tears, bawling (its unlike me to show such raw emotion). 14 months together, lots of ups and downs, and only now am I beginning to see to errors in the ways that I was. I've been no contact for the past 5 days, but was broken up with 15 days ago. This is by far the hardest thing I think that I have ever had to do, but I still hold on to hope. Regarding the anxiety...it's bad. Mainly because she lives three doors down and I constantly am able to see when she's home or not. My ego makes me believe that every single guy in the neighborhood, or any unknown vehicles, are men sleeping with her. This is tough, the worst. I probably look out the window 20 times per day. This is tough
Planiversity, LLC Hopefully things have gotten better for you. I am going on day 7 of No Contact. I screwed up the first day after she requested a break with no contact and am struggling now. We are supposed to meet at the counselor again in about 10 days-if she shows.
Oh man, this is my situation. As our relationship was developing she had to move. She moved closer to me.
Next my home sold so I had to move...and moved into the same street. Wait for it. 3 homes apart. What started as a blessing is now torture. After a rage and physical assault over me leaving her home one night after it seemed she didn't really want to be with me.
She texted me the following day and asked for my help with what parts to buy for a project she was doing for her home.
She began with "I know you are ignoring me..." WTF?...she abused and assaulted me just the night before.
Been no contact a month before she texted me asking where to obtain an ingredient for a recipe she used to cook me.
Not even a fake apology...
But is a good thing to remind you all that if you work/study/have kids/pets or staff to get from their place, you SHOULD NOT be on full no contact but smart contact, just straight to the point, polite, stick to the subject (work, kids) and never mention the breakup/relationship or show anger.
Craig, no contact has been extremely hard. After the breakup I reached out twice, after bad advice from a friend, mainly because she was going through serious health issues, she always responded positively. We met up 5 months before she moved to a different state. I did not bring up the relationship at all or beg, anything like that. After our meeting I decided to go no contact. It's been over 9 months since we saw each other and she didn't let me know when she was moving after saying she would, which hurt a lot. Still going no contact though. To answer your question, no contact has been absolutely brutal.
Nice video! I just wondering what to talking when he reach out ... I just answer brief or keep some conversation chat? What to talk. Bc he keep reach out and if he don't see I talking much he go disappear?? Ugh
Craig you being my support support
Thanks pastor Craig
Do you Any packages coach
Craig, I have had my heartbroken so many times that breakups and NC get easier for me. I don't have anxiety as much after the breakup as I do DURING the breakup. So now I am at a 5/10 with NC
It's a 10/10 since she also is staying with her dad in a different part of the country since the break.
What if they reached out to me for a casual conversation, kept it cool, asked what I was up to, didnt talk about the breakup - but then didnt reach out again? Its been 12 days
10/10 or we wouldn’t be on here, Coach!!!!! 😏
No contact is brutal!😔 Going on one week now, and I'm already going crazy.
Hi Craig,no it's not hourly,its every minute!! Seriously 😑, today is 10-10-23, its going on none days in five hours. Sometimes im ok,them things parade before my eyes and im tortured! Worse he has me on delivered since nine days ago when we exchanged words on this misunderstanding, very painful to deal with,thank god that i found ur channel,ur my sanity lifesaver! 💯
10:58
Craig is so funny!😅😂 Thank you for this video coach! I had a feeling of breaking no contact too a few days back but I remained strong.. Its been 2 months now
Lyri-K ZW any updates?
10/10 I've been with her for about two and a half years and she broke up with me about four times and I've always been able to make things better by talking to her and even bringing Flowers by where she was at but this time it's different
She said she's made up her mind and she's not going to try to fix things and she unfriended me on almost all social media but never blocked me but she would barely respond to anything... she still has a lot of things at my house she said that she could either help me pay for the rest of the month at my house or we could be roommates till the end of the year.... I saw her about a week later when she came to get some of her clothes for a job and she let me hug her and kiss her and she did tell me that she love me but then she went back to ignoring me after she left.... I've been trying to do no contact but I told her happy birthday on her birthday and I didn't get a response but she got a package in the mail and I told her and she said tk u... on messenger I am still nicknamed love and she is still nicknamed baby...... I've been doing no contact knowing that she has to come back and I'm hoping for the best because she can never tell me down when she's in my presence
lmao stand in front of a moving bus!! 😂😂
Well hello there lol 😍
Lmfao 🤣
signed up yesterday for email coaching, looking forward to the insight because I am torn up over the "what can I do'' question and the constant anxiety over not hearing from her
I did no contact.
After 5 weeks she dropped off a coffee table we both worked on as a fun project when we reconnected after our breakup.
She did that on the same day she posted a pic on FB with a guy she had just started seeing.
I took it quite badly and told her through a friend she's not welcome to drop anything off again
She responded saying she didn't intend to hurt me and feels deeply sad.
That was our last contact. Now 6 months.
She told a mutual friend 5 mths ago she's 'moved on'.
I sometimes wonder if she will reach out. I hope so.
I’m currently about 2.5 weeks into a break up, I was with a girl who was amazing, so loving and caring and she went cold on me and left me high and dry by breaking it off over a text...
I started no contact for a days and she reached out with a silly text that start general chat over the week.
On about the 3rd conversation I ask her if she missed me and it all went down hill from there ... and she told me to never contact her again.
It’s now been 7 days with zero contact.
We dated for 4 months and I’m hung up on her badly and I really hope we can work it out ...
any good guys??
We were meant to spend this coming weekend together however she doesn’t want me there now ... hmmm such a hard time I’m feeling it 10/10
it is a rollercoaster, was doing fine until valentine day. After having gone out with other people, I really miss her, I broke the no contact this week :( after several months. It is definitely a 10/10
.Update?
What happens if he contacts me but it’s all small talk? We work together so he has come up to me about three times in the last 45 days.. all casual talk no relationship stuff...
no contact can be better but is full of wonderings and pains, but you have to go no contact as hard it can be
Coach Craig I broke NC. This will be the 4th time he breaks up with me. The first time was bc he just liked me as a friend. Even tho we would act like a couple. Then he said he wanted to focus on himself. 3rd time ghosted me. Now this 4th time he said once again I’m going to focus on myself and my career. But this last time his family knew about our relationship and they really wanted to meet me. All the other times he left me I did not contact him at all. He always contacted me. It would precisely take 3 months. But this last time I reached out to him after 2 wks. I simply asked if he was okay and he said Hi I’m okay, stay blessed. Ouch! In other words Bye don’t text me. This 4th break up hurts sooo much more than the other times bc he was talking about us moving in having a baby and building a life together to even saying I love u and telling his grandma and for him that’s huge. But I broke NC and I don’t know what to do. Please Help!
How are you doing now? Did he reach out again?
100 out of 10 I a hopeless romantic .
But today I am starting strong . I listen to you every day from awake to bed to middle of the night when I can not sleep . From no contact , to attachment . To every one . I have learnt so much . So thank
You . I would do your email or Skype but I don’t have the money at the moment . So hopefully soon thank you for your videos ❤️🩹🤩
I have no problem with NC but i want to avoid my ex of seeing someone else while NC. i want to just text her and say i am never going to contact you again I will leave you alone because i want you to do whatever it is you want to do but if you have seen someone, seeing someone or plan on seeing someone please never contact me ever again.
Dante DaVinci good luck with that...the whole point of no contact is showing that you're okay with allowing the other to have their space and do their own thing whole you do yours. Whatever decisions they make while apart isn'tyour business anymore. But if you feel you have to contact your X to make that statement then obviously you're not okay with "no contact" because then you would have broken the rule. Sounds like you're a little controlling because your insecurities tbh. I'm sure she knows how you feel anyways but it doesn't matter is the point.
Lol it sounded like "she's getting off work soon... I know because I WAS THERE"