How to Improve Confidence and Self-Worth | Being Well Podcast
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- Опубліковано 8 чер 2024
- In today’s episode @RickHanson and I explore how we can improve our self-confidence. We explain why becoming better at something doesn’t always make us more confident, the two paths of gaining confidence and releasing insecurity, and how we can release insecurity over time. We then talk about the differences between confidence and narcissism, dealing with other people when they try to put us down, and how we can develop an authentic sense of self-worth.
Key Topics:
0:00 Introduction
2:05 Discerning confidence from capability
8:10 Releasing insecurity vs. gaining confidence
13:30 Sources of insecurity, celebrating others’ vision, and tapping into universal currents
20:45 Redefining what a win looks like, and surrendering to the best in ourselves
25:55 Finding people who believe in you, taking action, and not knowing
30:55 Our core beliefs, why they are rational, and how to update them
34:10 Self-worth, and confidence in your own innate goodness
38:50 The difference between self-confidence and narcissism
44:00 Facing the fear of what will happen if you are confident
52:35 When being poorly received is about others and not you
55:05 Recap
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Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
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🌍 www.forresthanson.com
📸 / f.hanson
Your videos are one of my safe spaces. Listening to your insights and the warmth in your relationship is so wonderfully comforting, educative and stimulating. Thank you 💚
Online dating seems dysfunctional to me, and these people realize it. I feel like it's riddled with narcissists and people who are disingenuous. I'd think that volunteering or taking classes etc would work better for meeting people in an organic way.
Agreed, especially if you’re not a fan of social media like myself. It just seems like an amplified form of the worse aspects of social media. But a lot of people seem to like it especially if they are not willing to get out in the world.
But all those narcissistic and disingenuous people also exist in real life. They don't suddenly become green flags just because you meet them at a library.
@@bprabawabr Of course not but it's harder for them to deceive you in person. For example, they can't use a ten-year-old photoshopped picture to catfish you. You can see their micro-expressions. And many other giveaways.
@@middleofnowhere1313 but you only use dating sites to meet people, not have a relationship with them. You end up meeting them in person too eventually, and then everything goes from there. So the things you mentioned can all still happen.
Video dropped harder than my self confidence back in high school 😁😜🙃
😅🤣😂
😅 I’m emotionally reacting to this comment.
You probably don’t remember, but I believe you tried to reach out to help me once in college when I had some mental health issues start surfacing. Thank you for doing what you do, it’s god’s work, so to speak.
For me, confidence = feeling safe and compassionate enough with myself to try
I feel that one of my biggest insecurities is lack of dating experience. I’m still young but when I go on dates I can get very stressed (especially beforehand). I think it’s because I really want a good partner for myself and don’t exactly know what I’m looking for and I tend to over analyze things too. I liked the relationship episodes a lot. If you guys could ever do a dating video maybe centered on how to think during a first date, or how to decide wether to peruse an individual, or how or when to express your feelings for them😂😅it would be incredibly helpful to me! Anyways I love the videos!!❤
I'm not an expert but I think a good way to start off is just to consider if you would like that person as a friend, minus the romantic part. If the answer is no, don't keep dating them. If the answer is yes, then it would be good to slowly develop the relationship. My husband was a friend for 2 years before we even thought about dating, whereas with dudes that I just started right into the romance it always ended up going bad.
I actually really love your comment because I have had this thought in the back of my mind for a while. That's how my parents started out and my friends with the strongest romantic relationships were friends first too. I'm going to really keep that in mind thank you!@@middleofnowhere1313
Popping in here, when I let go and enjoy the ride, I'm not lowering the bar or deciding whether I will or won't achieve a goal. What's happening is I'm seeing where life actually is, and, that outcomes area temporary flash in the pan before my goals shift anyway.
If I reside in wins and losses, my life is short.
Residing in the movement, life feels closer to eternity, real and metaphor.
another amazzzzzing episode. thank you thank you! you're a great team and bounce well off one another's ideas and thoughts. extremely compassionate and knowledgeable.
This is a big topic. To share my experience with it having general anxiety disorder since young, with chronic pain. Most of the things I was terribly insecure about had to do with wanting to be in a driverless society, and not driving until I was 30. Accepting that I have cPTSD. And now I understand where I was coming from. In hindsight, I have more space to be confident in new ways accepting that society is not carved out for sensitive people usually.
I relate to the driving situation - we will feel better if we don't hold ourselves up to the standards of the majority
True, society do not like sensitive people, they treat them like dormant. I now understand this, life is not easy with Cptsd its a everyday battle.
I feel like you both did a great job of navigating the nuance in that kind of messy core of the topic that Rick eluded to in the beginning. Forrest, I especially loved how you touched on that tricky balance some people can struggle to hit between turning confidence either to a 1 or all the way up to a 13. Definitely something that I’ve struggled with.
Towards the end there was also a really lovely balance struck between being aware of when you being received poorly in a social situation is either a) down to a lack of skilfulness on your own part - an inability to read the room, pay attention to the culture, etc, or whether it’s just b) way more to do with those people who are trying to take you down a notch.
A tricky topic but you both managed to extract some content from it that I found massively valuable. Appreciate you both!
Wow! This is one of my favorite conversations between you two. I felt like, thanks to you, important insights about the origins of my issues with self-worth and possibly ways of addressing them kept popping in my head. I am going to watch this again.
Such an informative docu-chat embellished with golden insight & humour to energise!😊
So many great insights in this one!
highly valuable episode with a lot of wisdom - thank you
I'm so thankful for these conversations with you and your dad. 🙏. Very helpful and illuminating!
This resonates. Thank you!
Thank you for the Episode. The Part about to enjoy and to desire was something i experienced but never looked at it with a critical mind. Now i do, thanks👌
Love you guys!❤
It would be helpful if we got an episode on " Destination Addiction " . Your insights and suggested directions are practically workable and helpful. Thank you ever so much for all the good work .
hey, videos are great! Love how much fun dad and kid have fun together. Constructive comment, tricky to find an hour to watch them fully. Would be great shorter versions
Thanks!
“Their incentive structure is rooted in not understanding”
“You can’t convince somebody of something that it is their PAYCHECK not to believe”
Love the references to Dr K and his Healthy Gamer work. Would be great to see you all talk with him!
Random but what microphone are you using? Your audio quality is so clean!
I use the Shure sm7b, Rick uses the Rode Procaster.
Bonne vidéo ! Personnellement, je conseille le livre "CONFIANCE EN SOI, ESTIME DE SOI", de Nathan Stone. Y a tout ce qu'il faut savoir, c'est clair, pas de discours superflu, le top. Je connais beaucoup de personnes de qui ça a changé la vie !
Faith & cbt helps
Enjoying the process instead of single-mindedly seeking the goal is certainly a good thing in most aspects of life, but it's not a form of confidence. It's a positive way of thinking about lowering the bar. It's saying, "I probably won't reach the goal, so I might as well try to enjoy the ride." It's the opposite of confidence.
Totally identify, though, with the part about having an engine of self-doubt to motivate yourself to achieve. That's precisely how I operate.
Yes Forest, youre full of hot air!! 😆 You and your Dad are a great team and truly complememt each other in your field of focus.🪁🔥🪂
Dr k mentioned!!!! RAHHHH‼⁉❗❕