Steven Crowder Abuses Wife Allegedly - Therapist Reacts (Part 2)
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- Опубліковано 8 тра 2023
- Dr. Kirk Honda reacts to video footage of Steven Crowder.
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A couple of notes: (1) he's extremely wealthy and there's no reason to only have one car in Texas other than for control purposes and (2) this was recorded in mid 2021, making your pregnant wife Uber around in a pandemic is ridiculous.
I don't use Uber at all. Not safe. People driving are independent contractors and only background checked. That doesn't mean the person is safe. They may have yet to be caught. You are litterally stuck in a vehicle and anything can happen. Having your 8 months pregnant with twins wife. Uber is ridiculous all the way around. My next question if there is only one car and he uses it. What about leaving her home without a way to go anywhere. Apparently that's fine but not for him... to go out run some arrange and come back. This man is a controlling abuser. I was married to one. I've chosen to stay single and independent the past 13 yrs and I have never been happier. Its been refreshing. I wasn't allowed to even look up in a store with him because I may make eye contact with another man. I lived in hell for 4.5 yrs and he left the home and marriage in handcuffs. He injured both me and my mother while holding out 3.5 yr old child taking her off my hip while he was angry and I was thrown into a wall. Had my Mom not been in the house it would have been alot worse. I had begun standing up for myself and taking my power back. He lost his shit. Blows my mind the comments I've been reading on different channels regarding this video. So many people do not recognize this as mentally Abusive and controlling. Imagine what we aren't seeing! Been there. Terrifying. She's walking on eggs shells and still trying to take her power back. Wifely duties? You're not taking the car?!? Because I will be left here without. Yikes. This has really triggered my memories and ptsd this is a very toxic relationship and bringing two babies into the mix is a Terrifying thought. I cannot imagine the anxiety going thru her. I felt it second hand!
Yeah, and they're outside. Imagine what goes on behind closed doors.
It was Texas though, no one took the pandemic seriously over there, especially far right lunatics
The "i don't love you" is probably all the evidence her divorce needs
I think so too. Those are probably the ultimate harsh words. Like I am not the kind of person who needs constant affirmation and to be told "I love you" hardly at all. But if my husband says to me "I don't love you," I would be out of there.
And that's obviously not the worst thing or the first time he's ever said that shit to her.
@caseyw.6550 yet he's out there complaining about no fault divorce. My guy, you said you don't love her, that's not a "no fault" anymore. 🤦♂️
@Gokce-Aysun I've never had a fight so bad that i said that to anyone i was with. At that point it's not about being right, it's just about winning in the moment.
Her divorce doesn't need any "evidence". You're allowed to leave partners who tell you they adore you. Your unhappiness should be enough to leave any relationship, even a marriage.
"I'm looking for the logic where there obviously is none." LOL. Put that on a tshirt.
Context: Steven crowder went on his public platform to announce to the his audience that he’s been going through a divorce. In his announcement he portrayed himself to be a victim and implied that she just decided for no good reason to divorce him and portrayed himself to just be a victim of no fault divorce and that he had no choice and powerless because she’s the one that initiated the divorce. He spoke out against no fault divorce. And said that the only thing that he did wrong in his marriage was choosing the wrong woman. And that he wanted to keep this whole ordeal private for the sake of his kids.
As a response his ex wife and her family leaked this video and gave statements to Yashar Ali. Basically claiming that he’s been abusive for years and Hilary wanted to work things out. They said that Crowder was not present for the birth of his children due to him having an elective surgery. And after Hilary gave birth, Crowder moved out, cut her off financially and was in talks with a divorce lawyer and Hilary found out, she beat him to the punch and initiated the divorce.
There have been information coming out from people that worked for Crowder claiming he was terrible to work with.
Goodness imagine hearing this while this man tells his worshippers that she is the wrong woman. 😢
@@yasmineyusuf2890 being someone hard to work with doesn’t mean necessarily that they are a bad husband.
Also, everyone is piling onto crowder. But there’s no context to the start of this whole argument. You can’t say definitively that crowder is the one being abusive here.
@@starcrafsf7101 In the video it’s definitely crowder being abusive, but I can’t speak on the entirety of their relationship whether or not he was abusive.
With that being said many people that have worked with him and lived with him that aren’t connected to each have come out and said that he engages in shady business, is controlling and has explosive temper. And now his wife too. It shows a pattern on behavior in which he’s the common denominator. It doesn’t look good for him. I mean dude was exposing his genitals to his workers.
The put on gloves is about her giving their dog a medication. She was worried about giving it to the dog because she thought it might be bad for her babies and didn’t want to touch it so she asked him to give it to the dog and he won’t. Because he’s a big man baby and doesn’t want to do “woman” chores 🙃
Would you look at them family values 🙄🙄
I thought these guys took their gender role of protecting their wives so seriously! the only reason these guys talk so much about protecting women is as a threat that they could stop at any time.
Wow 😢
@summer etry i read a post once that said something along the lines of 'men say they will protect their women in the context of a fight, they will pick up the sword to 'defend her', they dont mean safegaurd her feelings, or well-being' if that makes sense.
@@emmalouise4864 sounds about right. She could be physically harmed by the dog's medication, but giving your own dog meds doesn't give the same ego boost that sitting there thinking about disarming a burglar does.
I never liked Steven, but I didn't understand why he creeped me out. Now I do. He loves to corner other people. He doesn't want to hear you in a debate, he wants to win. He not good at debating, but he's good at manipulating the argument to follow his rules. The people he wants to debate are unprepared students. They came to practice their skills and he came to win against someone easier.
The way he treats his wife, he'd never treat a burly man like that. I'm afraid for his wife, especially since he realized she's emotionally wiser than him, and started hurling abusive threats at her. Wait until he realizes she can be happier without him too. Steven is not a stable man, and he wants to win. This isn't the end of him trying to control her.
What's so sad about people like this is that what happens inside their private home is very, very far from the ideal they want to portray in public.
@@FerrenehThe cracks began to show in the past six months even before this. When he threw a tantrum and betrayed his friend by recording a call with him and then playing it for the world, it was clear that his morals were suspect. Perhaps you could make an argument for playing a tape of a friend who had done something terrible like slept with your wife. But taping him because 50 million over three years wasn't enough money for you is trashy. Then there are the former employees who came out to discuss his terrible behaviour.
Sad that someone turns out like him.
Yeah except many of the people he debates with are equally as bad as he is or worse. One could argue he became a bad person because he's constantly being threatened by psycho leftists all the time who are trying to dox him. There's plenty of incidents on camera of crazy people he's interacting with so let's not pretend this is some sort of right wing problem.
The fact he is verbally abusing his 8 month pregnant (with twins) wife is one thing, awful … but what really gets me is the blatant disregard for the well being of his unborn children… puffing cigar smoke in the proximity of his wife, insisting she go do his chores in an Uber during covid exposing her to both being in a strangers car and becoming ill, stressing her out which can cause fetal growth problems and preterm birth.. then of course yelling “I’ll fuck you up”.. him attempting to force her to administer extremely dangerous medication to their dog that pregnant women are not supposed to handle “put on the gloves!” …. Absolutely inexcusable as if we expected anything better from the racist homophobe hypocrite who insists women shouldn’t have the right to divorce and who gleefully re-enacted George Floyd’s murder. Let’s remember that the leading cause of death for pregnant women and 40 days postpartum is now domestic violence… she must have been terrified.
I couldn’t agree more. Well said!
absolutely insane that he cant even have restraint for his pregnant wife, not even for his unborn children, what a man child.
Domestic violence often/usually escalates during pregnancy. Just one sign of how sick these abusers are.
Have you heard his take on the divorce? Omg it's so ridiculous. He makes himself look like a victim and that SHE gave up on the marriage and he made the wierdest comment about how women shouldn't be allowed to divorce without a good reason.
He's insane I hate him.
and of course he's "pro-life"
Steven is abusive. No one can change my mind because I was a victim before. Now I just know better. I can see from miles away.
Right, and the fact that one of the first sentences out of his mouth while announcing his divorce was that there was NOT physical abuse - like who even claims that right off the bat? The fact that it was a "no fault" divorce came second lol.
❤❤❤ sending love
Exactly! Didn’t even need to watch the whole video
@@bananawammabama Emotional abuse is worse than physical. Wounds and injuries heal. Mental abuse stays for life.
@@TheUnderCoverMother2020 I wasn't making a judgement on which one is worse, I agree they can be equally bad or worse depending. As someone who watches a lot of true crime, I would say there are definitely cases that physical is worse because many people seem to take it too far and the other person ends up dead. But in most cases yes, emotional abuse is very difficult to heal.
Yes he wanted her to go pick up groceries but in an uber in case he wanted to go somewhere in his "planned to the second" day.
I think his point was that she could have gone to the store or had groceries delivered while he was at work, since she didn’t have a job. I don’t think he actually wanted her to take an Uber, I think he wanted her to have already have that done so they could spend time together after he gets home from work. My guess is they have an agreement that she does house work in exchange for not having a job.
@@stellasfarmlife2465 Whatever arrangement they had goes out the window at 8 months pregnant with twins. INCLUDING, but not limited to, handling toxic materials.
@@amberwilliams8240 absolutely! As someone that has twins, 8 months is full term. I had my girls at 8 months and I could barely walk or breathe.
To be fair he said "get it an Uber", probably meaning she could order the groceries so she could stay and walk the huge dogs and give one of them toxic meds while he keeps yelling she's not worthy of love 😅 He debated her like she was a stranger and not a heavily pregnant wife🤦♀️
@@lucky2516 Uber doesn't deliver groceries LOL. Just a Ride for people. 😂
Apparently he’s had problems with ex-employees in the past and they all say he’s extremely insecure and controlling. He uses the one car to control her. Idk why so many people are confused as to why a multimillionaire only has 1 car.
He hasn't only had problems with ex employees, he literally has been controlled by his father throughout his career lol. That goes back to when his dad told him he couldn't debate Sam Seder because he would lose, so they made up all the excuses to avoid him, but got caught anyway. He's never been respected in his workplace at all.
@@bananawammabama what do you make of the allegations from ex employees that he even yells at his dad? Also, he calls him by his first name, not "dad"
@@darkprince56 I just think it makes him seem like more of a self important diva, but haven't thought about it too much.
I really wanted Dr. H to get to his stance on no fault divorces AND him threatening to release her mental health records to the public. Absolutely despicable, sorry excuse of a man
there is deleted context that she played roulette with their child life by not using protective gloves. It could literally kill the baby. After gambling its life she spam "i love you i love you".
It doesnt CLEAR Steven, he still fucked up and failed to find healthy solution. But yeah it is just tailored video, you see his melt down, what you cant see is he melt down cause she risk literally life of a baby bc of laziness (using those protective gloves isnt very femanding, it isnt something that requires many hours of commitment, that should shine up a little why he talk she easly give up, she say love but actually doesnt show love in actions etc).
Still Steven failed but yeah. Imagine your husband would not use protection or lets say he would stay drunk like hell with newborn and risk its life. And then he would leak video of your meltdown about it, hiding what he earlier did.
Im shocked cause i know context and its perfecly tailored, i would be ultra mad on Steven without knowing this...
Protective gloves by non health professionals doesnt show anyreal benefit, thats why bartenders dont wear them even when putting fruit in glasses. Washing hands can and often is enough
@@tomekes6129 If giving the dog medicine is harmful to her pregnancy and has to use gloves, Why is she even doing it? Why wouldn't he take the initiative and do that task himself? Why put his pregnant wife at risk for contamination? Why risk a broken glove etc? Even if that's the reason he comes across horrible. It also comes across as an excuse for not allowing her to leave. She wanted to leave, he could have just done the medicine himself if he cared so much about her and the kids.
@@tomekes6129 no, he wanted her to give the dog medicine, she refused which started the fight
I didn't know about that. Yikes.
“Wifely duties” says enough in itself. My ex-husband frequently used this term.
Yep
Mine, too!
I can’t stand Crowder. He’s genuinely just a bad human so I’m refreshed you did not pull any punches on this. He’s actually worse than this.
Noone can't understand him cause there is deleted context that his wife, before that melt down you see, gambled their child health/life by not using protective gloves when it literally could kill the baby.
He fucked up ofc, but what is the answer to wife risking life of your child by... i guess laziness. How to fight for that child safety? Clearly not like Steven did, but how?
@@tomekes6129 Don't know if that's true because I won't rely only on your claim. But if it is, just administer the dog the medication yourself rather than force your wife to do it. If there's a risk of the meds harming the babies, then just do it yourself. You know. As someone who doesn't carry unborn life.
@@tomekes6129 That's even worse because HE COULD HAVE GIVEN THE DOG THE MEDICATION!
@@tomekes6129 I understand all I need to thank you very much. If you chose to ignore what you see with your own eyes because of what you can’t see you aren’t playing 4 dimensional chess you’re just being ignorant. There’s no ostensible context that makes any of this Ok, but there is plenty of context that he is a hateful self righteous asshole.
@@tomekes6129 Are you getting paid to spam these lies? Not that it's a good one, many people seem to agree it makes him look even worse lol. Maybe provide a source next time, you can't just say it's deleted.
I once heard crowder talking about his divorce and he said something like, "she's leaving. Of no desire of mine. because it's not illegal to divorce in texas even when your spouse doesn't want to". I couldn't even listen to more of it. It sounded disgusting. As if he thought it should be illegal for his wife to leave him. Ugh!
Sure…. Not like “no fault” divorce, like the one that was filed here by her, is not one of the biggest contributors of our broken society….
@@starcrafsf7101 did your wife divorce you or something? What’s wrong with no fault divorce? It lets women escape their awful husbands when they don’t have proof of abuse. Is that what you have a problem with?
@@bridgetc247 other than the fact that it shouldn’t be a simple thing to say “I don’t want to be married to you anymore”?
When you get married you take vows, those vows include the phrases “for better or for worse, sickness and in health, till death do us part”
Not “until I tore of your companionship”
There’s only two valid reasons for divorce, abuse and infidelity. And seeing as crowder and his wife indicate there was no infidelity, that only leaves abuse, and one can’t claim that abuse was the cause when she filed a no fault divorce, nor can you definitively say, from a 3 minute clip of one argument that there was abuse in their relationship.
@@starcrafsf7101 there’s actually more than 2 million valid reasons for divorce, not just 2!
@@Zeeves unless it’s abuse or infidelity, then no, there no other valid reason you can give me for divorce being acceptable.
You agreed to a marriage, for better or for worse. If your just going to decide to leave it all and give up and walk away, then you should never have gotten married in the first place. And if that’s ever something to be considered, then yea, you are the wrong person to be married to.
There's an implication thats if you want a faithful husband, you need to be a good wife he can take pride in... it's subtle buts it's there
Why does he talk to her like she's his employee? It's weird...
And also, bosses shouldn't talk to their employees like that either
@@rachelreynolds0430 Seriously this is like a boss speaking to an employee and HR doesn't exist. Yikes
Funny you should say that. Recently 10 of Crowder's former employees commented on this video in the media, saying that he was a "bully" of a boss and that he ran an "abusive" company.
Here is a direct quote from the New York Post article:
"... he often screamed at his employees - including his own father - exposed his genitals, sent out directives to arbitrarily fire people and made underlings wash his dirty laundry."
He's also being accused by multiple former employees of treating them like garbage, exposing his genitalia, yelling at his father (who worked for him) and making them wash his personal items. No one was off limits.
because he doesn't see her as a person. she's just an object to him that he owns
I might be reading into things, but I think it’s interesting that right after he says “I don’t love you” she pulls her shirt down to cover her belly, and then puts her hands over it, in what I see as a protective move. My heart goes out to her - she’s gotta be really strong to have endured that. 😢
Yeah, you are way too sensitive. And thirteen people liked your comment? ...Just goes to show, most of the prejudgement people, in regard to this edited scenario, are proving themselves to be overly emotional females. Objectivity over emotion is what's needed here. The doctor made no conclusions, because there's not enough evidence (no surprise). I mean, I don't know how many times the doctor has to say, "I don't know," before people actually here it.
Perfect summary of the situation in Dr. Honda's quote "She's in an impossible situation. There are several evils that she has to pick the lesser of." This is exactly how an abusive relationship feels to the victim: trying to pick the lesser of several evils that your partner is creating daily.
Yes! That was such a good insight, and so is yours 👍🏾
something that alerted as abusive to me, on top of everything we've heard and seen, is that they only have one car. Steven publicly declined a $50 million offer from The Daily Wire and moved to a different platform so we can infer that the offer was significant. All that money and one car reads as a control tactic.
Also, your wife is 8 months pregnant with twins. Why is she carrying heavy wood pellet bags and putting dog medicine that can be risky for her? They can very comfortably hire someone or/and get groceries delivered.
That 50 million offer was the entire production budget for Crowder, not a salary.
It was a budget tied with penalties of upwards 120% so it’s disingenuous to say that crowder gave up 50 million. Because that would barely be enough to cover all expenses over the term of the contract period. Which was something like 12.3 million a year to cover all filming, recording, pre and post production, employee payroll, travel expenses, security etc. when you add all that overhead expenses up, that 50 million shrivels up quite quickly when you have 20+ employees alone.
@@starcrafsf7101 Yea but you can certainly afford a second car. Get an economy one.
@@TheUnderCoverMother2020 and your stuck on assuming they only own one car
@@starcrafsf7101 Hmmm. He's saying if she takes the car he will be stuck unable to go places and tells her to call for an Uber for herself. LOL 😆 Why would she need an Uber of they had more than one car.. like Hello?
She is literally having to placate for her life. I’ve been there, this is so hard to watch….
The most telling of her fear is continually going back and picking up the leash and putting it down again. You can physically see her internal battle.
This. She is genuinely battling about whether to go and walk the dogs like he's demanding/yelling at her go and do... She eventually wins and doesn't give in and do it. But yeah, she picks up that leash a couple of times.
I feel bad for his wife but I'm glad Cold Feet Crowder is being exposed for being as awful in real life as he is on air.
Married man here, I could NEVER in my right mind talk to my wife like that. Especially if she was carrying a child of mine. The last thing she needs is unnecessary stress
@@xpmedia8660 He's pro-life but isn't concerned with the safety of his own unborn children. Toxic chemicals, stress, cigar smoke. Amazing.
@@amberwilliams8240 unbelievable....as a man. We don't claim him.
25:20 - is he saying 'i have a white woman wife - hashtag white woman' ????? What the HELL even does that mean?!
Im guessing that he wishes he had a woman who was less liberal and more submissive??? (Which is a stereotype for other races) he’s despicable
That's what i was wondering too..? o__0
Disturbing. I hope he is not one of those men who think if they go and coerce a wife from a country in Asia they can have an easier time controlling them. I have no idea what that means; it's bizarre.
@@wonipowa7542 That's a scary theory, like he gives himself credit for finding a white woman wife.. ew. I'm not religious but I pray for any single WOC that crosses his path in the near future. He'll for sure find someone who is unaware of all this controversy coming to light.
Even just 6 years ago I was lured in by this kind of talk. Always thinking, "Yeah sure, some women are happier to be housewives. Nothing wrong with that." Not even realizing that they themselves never said, "some". At the time I completely missed the underlying point 🤦🏻♀️. I drove some of my friends crazy. They would try to explain the underlying point to me and I was like, "But that's not what he said?" I feel so bad about it now; they were so right!
Just shows youve grown and can see and show that. 😊
English is not my first language but im so interested in this story that you are telling about growth, would you mind breaking it down to even simpler sentences for me to grab? 🥺
Congrats to you for having self awareness and being an adult that can recognize being wrong.
@@Yoyo-gf1jc I tried to write a response 5 times... Unfortunately the more I think about it the more complicated it becomes! I ended up on a deep dive into my mindset and upbringing as well as how I interpret what people say. All that made me susceptible to the harmful rhetoric that people like Crowder spew.
I started off being interested in egalitarian stuff. From there it only took two seconds to slide off onto coocoo land.
Changing my environment seemed to change how I interpret incoming information. I also realized that I can't just focus on my own wants, I have to think about what's best for my friends and community (especially in terms of voting). Plus one day I just thought to myself, "All this shit doesn't matter! Who cares!? None of this is hurting anyone!"
I remember I used to get so worked up thinking that "trans-trenders" were hurting the trans community... But one day I realized that people should be able to explore their sexual identities how they want to, not how I want them to.
@Zullala yea I went down that route too when I watched him for too long. Then I snapped out of it when I took care of my mental health and stopped watching drama videos for a while. SO much more peaceful and rational
I have no clue who this man is ... and thank goodnes👌🏽🙏🏼🤣
You win, Barb! We all wish we could say the same.
It’s a three video day. That means it’s a good day, thank you, Doc ❤
The gloves thing was he wanted her to give the dog it’s medication(guessing flea and tick application) and she didn’t want to do it bc she was pregnant and concerned it was harmful to the baby
No it’s a radioactive chemo drug. She’s pregnant with twins.
So sad. I don’t know how she’s holding it together because I would Lose it if I was talked to like this. And god, being pregnant with this man’s child means she’ll Always have to deal with him. 😢😢😢
@@foolishlyfoolhardy6004 Ugh. What a shit show! 😪 Sooooooooo Selfish! Also, we should all be a little foolhardy! 😉
There is hidden context that she earlier played roulette with child health/life by not using protection gloves. You can see his melt down but what is not seen is her literally gambling their both child life earlier. And reason for that gamble is unknown cause using those gloves takes maybe 5 mins, its not demanding. Thats why he talk a lot that she give up early, say i love you but never really show it in actions etc.
It is unfortunately tailored video.
@@tomekes6129is there hidden context or do u really want daddy crowder to be correct
When he said put on gloves, I think he meant boxing gloves like "get ready to fight then". A threat.
@@tomekes6129 you keep pushing this false narrative. She refused to give the dog the medicine. That’s what triggered him.
I think he says "I don't love you" in order to diminish her confidence
And gain the power back
I felt her "I ❤ U stephens" was to diffuse him. She seems terrified. Felt like learning new coping skills or when I started therapy 😂 employing all the tools. She even went and started to do what he asked by grabbing the leash;stopping herself.really sad but also cheering her on!
Wow I just realized how the system failed me in regards to my ex-husband. They too thought my ex only needed anger management when he was actually a Narcissistic Psychopath who believed that he had every right to abuse people (especially his wives). Sadly they often get it wrong. I can only say that I was able to keep him away because my family stood 100% behind me and protected me from him.
I’m glad you had your family to back you.
What is not showed is that she earlier gambled their both child health/life by nto wearing protection. We see meltdown but reason of meltdown is mostly hidden.
He still fucked up ofc. But that the full context that she play roulette with their child's life and ignore it.
@tomekes6129 you talk about a lack of context then give no context on an issue on wearing gloves 😂 like why and for what
@@acd1168I used to think he was afraid of my father and older brothers, but eventually I started to think he just did not want to go to prison, so he fled the country. He was one of those people that behaved recklessly and did what he wanted. Like he was not afraid of consequences. He was usually not an angry person (like Dr. Kirk explains). He was charming and actually put on a good guy facade. He could control himself. He could be calm until he did not want to calm in anymore. He seemed to like terrorizing me. (And other women he was married to.) He did not expect my family to be so close to me though. In some cultures, women may join their husband's family and focus on them. Not in some Turkic cultures. We remain close to our own tribe/family. My ex was an Arab from North Africa region (Maghreb region). It custom in his culture for a wife to move away from her family and join her husband's family. If anything he had to move and stay close to my family because I refused to separate from them. He could not get away with treating me like that.
Edit/Add on. I maybe should clarify that my family immigrated to the US a couple generations ago so I am talking about the United States justice system, thinking that my ex needed anger management and not a more serious treatment. But I have to admit that he knew how to charm and manipulate a lot of people. He knows what to say in a lot of situations.
@@Gokce-Aysun I'm West-African but I have family members who married North Africans. I know what you mean about how they charm people. It's not exclusive to North Africans but I know what you mean.
I am so glad your family had your back. That kind of relationship can destroy someone's self esteem and your family having your back makes a big difference.
My ex-husband never hit me, but I was emotionally and mentally abusive. He later admitted to my dad he was trying to get me to do something to myself. But no one believed me because I was never hit. This type of abuse is awful and is sometimes worse. Because it can't be proven. I still have to deal with him because of custody; I try to use grey rock and keep everything in a text message. I hope someone who reads that may be going through this knows they are not alone and can leave.
I've been following Steven Crowder for a long time. The Cliff's notes version is this:
1. Crowder was a child actor in Canada, and is probably best known as a voice actor in the children's cartoon series, Arthur.
2. Crowder learned early on that his career as a conservative pundit would be much more lucrative if his commentary was inflammatory. He became abusively anti-gay, anti-transgender, misogynistic and also willingly absorbed the right wing antipathy toward intellectualism, science and education. I don't know if it was before or after he came to Texas that he made it a point to appear on his show wearing his shoulder holsters and handguns. I will leave Dr. Honda and other psychologists to consider the possible messaging behind making sure others understand you are capable of lethal force while in public.
3. Crowder has also spent much of his career promoting traditional gender roles and sexuality. He's been open about saving his virginity for his wedding to his ex-wife.
Since his life has sort of imploded, he has used his platform to make strange pronouncements about his divorce. He repeatedly pointed out that his divorce is not the fault of his infant twin children - as if anyone would accuse babies of breaking up their parents' marriage.
His announcement also expressed antipathy for no-fault divorce, something that right wing conservative men have railed against for years because they are threatened by women's economic and legal independence from fathers and husbands.
I genuinely hope that Steven Crowder finds peace and healing from whatever his wounds are. I hope that he desists from targeting the most of vulnerable people in our communities to score political and cultural points. His ex-wife's family has stated that she filed for divorce after she learned he was interviewing divorce attorneys. So it would appear that he was going to initiate a divorce but is now saving face because seeking divorce would betray his deepest principles about marriage and family.
Can't imagine ever telling my partner ''I don't love you'' even in a fight. That's not something you can just take back.
Also point on with Politicians making their ''traditional family values'' statements as being nothing but dog whistles for misogyny. They don't care one bit about families when it comes to healthcare, livable wages, ensuring paid parental leave, affordable education, affordable childcare, affordable prenatal care, children being guaranteed access to food at school and at home, bettering social and child protection services, improving help for special needs kids, and passing basic gun regulations to reduce the frequency of mass shootings. Heck, they seem pretty happy to cut on food stamps and their response to school shootings is now to just shrug their shoulders.
You hit the nail right on the head.
I cannot speak for an entire group of people but I will speak for myself. For me, family is extremely important and I will prioritize my family above everything else. Yet it is my job and my partner’s to provide for our future kids. It is our job to give them shelter, food, and an education. It is our job to know how to protect them when in harm’s way and teach them the proper way to use a firearm in self-defense. After all, criminals don’t care what the law is. I worry about my sister walking alone to her car. I worry less if she has a gun and knows how to use it. Guns help protect the most vulnerable people in our society and although it is true the current mental health crisis has increased the chance of mass-shootings, we should not throw out the baby with the bathwater. The role of the government is to provide public goods (as defined) to solve the tragedy of the commons. When the governments involves itself in other areas, most of the time it provides worse solutions than already existing ones and furthermore devaluates the role of the family unit. This is very well-documented phenomena. Power corrupts and I think you are giving the government too much power over people’s daily lives once you start relying on it for your sustenance. It increases the chance of governmental corruption, lowers the bargaining power of the populace against rulers, and obliterates the family as an institution. The welfare state is directly correlated to corruption and single motherhood.
I will finalize by saying, traditional family values have nothing to do with the role the government should play into our lives. Although American conservatives tend to argue for both, the relationship between these two issues is only an American phenomenon. In my previous comment I argued that increasing the role of government is detrimental for the family unit. Yet I don’t believe in traditional gender roles. I think gender roles should be negotiated and the ability to negotiate with your partner is actually the most valuable personal asset will be gained from marriage. Learning how to support, cooperate, and negotiate with another human in a happy union is one of the greatest challenges in a person’s life. The non-triviality of this effort in my view, is what makes the cooperation between even larger groups of people (like the nation) less fruitful. This entire channel is a testament for the non-triviality of inter-personal relationships.
Being pregnant myself, I don’t think I can stomach this type of content right now, but thank you Dr H for using your platform on this issue.
Looking forward to this video! My day just brightened seeing there was 3 uploads today, thanks so much Dr. Honda!
I'm SO happy this is happening to him. I've always had a problem with this guy and CANNOT believe people couldn't see what an issue this guy is.
He gained famed by making videos of his 35 year old ass debating 18 year olds who barely understand basic political concepts. Why should we ever have expected more??
I actually liked some of the 'change my mind' videos. While your point about a 35 year old debating 18 year olds is well taken, 18 year olds are often the ones indoctrinated to become activists and protestors to change things. How are they supposed to change things for the better if they can't debate one 35 year political commentator?
What is not showed on this leaked video is that she earlier gambled health/life of their both child by not using protection. You see his melt down about wife that got full power of killing or not their both baby. And context was hidden, you see only reaction.
Sorry to tel you that so bluntly but i knowing it it change a lot. He still fucked up, but im curious what is the real solution to wife that may or may not kill your baby by accident and she doesn't care, like, what to say to her, and how?
@Tomek Es perhaps that happened and if it did that's an issue too. We have to remind ourselves that all drama isn't about one fight. It's about an entire relationship that lasted years and involved many things and actions on both parties. We will never know it all, but I'm willing to bet the guy who talks about women being servants and loves to make black jokes.....is probably in the wrong 🤣
@@tomekes6129 Everyone has been saying the context is that *she* refused to give medication to the dog because she was afraid handling the medication was unsafe for the baby.
That he insisted she do it anyways (put gloves on).
*He* is the one endangering the baby given that context.
This is the guy from the meme - he is seating at a table with a sign that says "feminism is a scam, change my mind". The meme was later adapted to make all sorts of jokes. I have been waiting for a life update for him, and I am not surprised at all.
It's not just a meme or adapted, it was his grift for a few years where he had bad opinions and forced college kids to "debate" / change his mind.
A mature and responsible husband would have handled the dog medication part himself, so that his pregnant wife wouldn't have to do it, and he would have also made some bare minimum effort to be supportive and helpful, EVEN during an argument;
so there is NO excuse for the way that Steven talks in this video.
Thank you for explaining attachment insecurity as a driving force of those behaviors. I was actually quite confused when I saw the video before when she says she is going to leave to run her errands and he says "is that a threat?". Like, in what universe is that a threat? Clearly, in the universe where he is terrified she will leave him.
and her question "who do you want me to call" also hints at his insecure attachment, his worry she'll leave him for someone else and so he has to be the one to pick who can spend time with his wife
Thank you so much for these videos. Hearing about the normalcy of the fawning and protection of the abuser is very validating. I hope it's okay to share these with some support groups I'm in.
He forgot to mention that these woman was told "you better be happy otherwise you are in trouble"
I love how your channel is a place I feel safe watching stuff like this! I learned a lot from this one. It's so interesting to me that these tactics are done from a place of fear. I'm not sure what I assumed they were rooted in before, but I really wasn't expecting that.
Dr Honda, hearing you talk about conservative ideology makes me wonder about your opinion on conservative psychogists such as Jordan Peterson. I know you don't like to stir the pot and talk negatively about other people, but I wonder how you think the field of psychology is shaped by these figures, especially their use of evolutionary psychology to support their ideals. An evolutionary psychology deep dive would be super interesting!
Their misuse of evolutionary psychology, you mean. Their social darwinism and absolute pseudoscientific dribble and at best, outdated information.
He would probably get dragged if he did anything on Jordan Peterson.
@@kendrabean606 That's true, I didn't consider the negative impact it may have on his channel..might be best to stay away from naming specific people with such protective fanbases...My suggestion was mainly for my own curiosity about evolutionary psychology and people'a opinions about it in the psych community!
@@carolinaaa99I can’t remember how deep they went but I believe Kirk and Berto talked about Peterson in their episode about cults a couple weeks ago
Peterson get's these guys hooked with simple tips like wash yourself and clean your room. It's honestly kinda sad how often men are like "his book changed my life" because they genuinely had zero routine or personal hygiene before that. From there they start taking his more sane takes and advice on and because they already trust him they start believing all the completely made up nonsense too. It's really fascinating how much some guys worship him. They get scary angry if they hear someone say something negative about him. Even irl.
"Put on some gloves" ...He wanted her to put flea meds on the dogs and she didn't want to do that because she is pregnant.
One time my ex brought me into the garage to "discuss" issues so the children would not hear us. There was a single lightbulb over our heads and two bare chairs while he interrogated me angrily. ( I cannot remember what was the infraction). I thought to myself..."I feel like I"m in a bad movie being interrogated in some unknown basement destination and tortured to admit to some crime I had not committed... Yes. It got that weird.
I've been through coercive control, and it's wretched.
No way he cant even help her with some chores, what a looser excuse of a “man”
I mean, in my unprofessional opinion, Steven should just marry another red pill "alpha" male.
And, you forgot to hear... Where the 8 month pregnant woman (with HIS twins) is going to do... Is buying some kind of stuff for him... And,she just needs the car to do stuff For him...
Yeah. This video makes me so angry and so sad at the same time. She is trying to buy groceries and get him what he needs, and he is going on about how she does not take care of her "wifely duties" and how she isn't "worthy"
Like. Dude.
They reason she can't give the medication for the dogs, are she's 8 months pregnant... But, he doesn't care enough..
@@pinsandneedles3 yeah, poor poor guy...
My x and Crowder went to the same "school"
He is actually also angry i could leave... (So, i moved far, far and bridges away, so he can't kill me)
So... Im kinda triggered... Or, angry...
Also just had to talk to my husband about why i didn't go to the police about a rape at the time...
So... Yeah, great evening for me...
(My current husband is amazing, very empathic, i got deprogrammed when I left the x, so I would never choose any one like the x (who I was with, to save)
We only talked about my former rape because of the new Trump judgement... Not because any of us want to... But, he is a guy, he doesn't understand why we don't...)
So, I just told you all my biggest wounds... But... I don't do taboos... I hope I'm not triggering you, though...
Also, he is having his pregnant wife carry those wood pellet bags for the grill? Wtf. Those are heavy.
I kinda had my suspicions he was a narcissist for a while from the way he acted and spoke. However, when he taped his friend's phone call over a freakin' salary negotiation (not like his friend did something terrible like sleep with his wife or something), it was clear who he was. He meets so many NPD criteria: lack of accountability over the DW thing, having tantrums and mistreating his staff, running roughshod over boundaries in professional settings, and now we see mistreating his poor wife.
That's not necessarily a sign of NPD though. It could very well be a neurotypical person who is abusive and brainwashed by sexism. Most abusers are neurotypical.
NPD revolves around upholding a pathologically inflated ego so as to compensate for deep seated insecurities. None of what you mentioned has anything to do with the disorder.
What video do not show is that earlier she gambled health/life a their both baby by not using protecting gloves. It is not demanding task to wear them and she still decided that she gonna play roulette.
That's the whole reason of his melt down. Saying she give up fast, say she loves but do not show this in actions, etc. It's still bad, he still failed. But lets imagine you got husband that just gabled life of your baby, by laziness, and he spam that he loves you. What would you say to him and how? (its real question cause i agree Steven fucked up but i can't find solution myself what to do in such risk)
@@tomekes6129 you know how you don't play roulette with your baby's health? By not demanding that your wife exposes herself to an illness when you can do the chore yourself.
@@sallyann985 Yeah i expected that discussion. In men version, it would sound like "you know how you don't play roulette with your baby's health? By not demanding your husband to not get drunk when you can take care of baby yourself and let him be wasted"
Women aren't so much weaker beings like you suggest here. Human risk life of a child from laziness = very bad.
I'm so grateful for you, Dr Kirk
An argument that my ex used and that I see here too: “You don’t do the things I ask you to do (meaning e.g. household chores) so you don’t love me. You aren’t committed to our relationship.” Confusing love with doing everything your partner wants you to do even if it means ignoring your own needs. And sometimes I feel people like him are just asking for those chores to test you, not even because they genuinely need you to do them.
This is a great perspective, and my first thought was that in some ways, some people DO validly value acts of service as their love language. But in situations like this obviously, it's just simple abuse. If Steven went to therapy, he could try to learn that asking for acts of service could be a kind way to communicate his needs, but no, instead he demands it, because he's just a plain and simple misogynist.
@@bananawammabama if his love language was acts of service then what is her love language? he doesn't care, like a true narc and a misogynist, only caring about *his* needs
@@FruityHachi Agreed, I would assume the question about her love language would come up in a therapy session.
The word 'thug' here in the UK means a violent, aggressive, criminal person. It doesn't matter what colour your skin is.
I hate that he brings politics into this. He makes it sound like a HUGE population of conservative males are misogynist. Or because people with common sense think it's wrong to burn down a building and loot, so they must be racist. I related to everything else so well having dealt with all the various types of abuse. I thought from a medical standpoint point it was very educational, but then to hear how he throws in his obviously bias political views, it was just a turn off.
Narcissism and being an Asshole, like any addiction, does not discriminate. They come in all shapes, sizes, colors, genders, creeds, sexualities, and political ideologies. Quit bringing right vs left
Plus, it wouldn't hurt to possibly do a tiny bit of research to gain context into what you're supposed to be reacting to, rather than waiting until the middle of your second video, to figure out the context. Probably could have just read the video description.
I had a boss that spoke to me like this and worse one day on the phone, I had to leave the building and was crying in my car. I somehow managed to say I was giving my two weeks notice in the conversation because I was not going to take this behaviour and I always knew he was a power hungry evil person. If you ever encounter someone like this get out and get away. They pray on “people pleasers” and they thrive on power. If you throw it back in their face and they blowup like this you will know your instincts were right.
"I'm looking for logic where there obviously is none..."
This is a throw back for me into conversations with my ex 🙈 weird seeing it from the outside but I remember how helpless you can feel in situations like that
I am so happy to have your insight on this man and the convoluted workings of his world, having followed these kinds of people for a while and disagreeing with them time and time again. Thank you.
I just wanna say how valuable I think Dr Honda videos are. He always manages to make me put apart my reactivities (justified or not) and help me understand things more deeply (including myself and people around me and also helps me develop and excercise my empathy more in an healthy way
Glad you’re reacting to this! ❤
It's heartbreaking that those who pick these people as partners feel that they are an exception to their partners abhorrent and abusive views/ behaviors. Maybe even the abuser has made them feel 'special'..."you are not like other women etc". However, once they displease the abuser, they become one of the " others"and get mistreated too.
True, but they also probably share some of their conservative and misogynistic views (internalized, I suppose), such as “traditional family values” and whatnot.
Not excusing anything obviously!! Just saying
i will say, i don't think there's anything wrong with "submitting to your husband" and being a stay-at-home wife/mom, but the man HAS to be a man worth submitting to. if you're garbage, i don't want to (nor have to) submit to you or stay at home.
This was such a nuanced interpretation, part 1 &2 . So many levels to consider. Thank you so much for your professional knowledge on this topic.
Crowder acts like a 5 year old.
I genuinely appreciate you covering this!
There is a small minority of people pressing a narrative that Hilary is the abusive/manipulative one. Quite disturbing and likely very telling of their own views and/or experiences. This isn’t to say Hilary doesn’t have flaws, but as you noted, she speaks and behaves in a very strategic manner that is aiming to minimize the consequences of the conversation itself, as well as her need to remove herself from the environment.
Although I have personally always found Steven Crowder to be an immature asshole… I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a semi-recent increase in his more abusive behavior. Crowder went through an escalation in (professionally) humiliating events, over the last 3+ years. Most notably, 5 days before this interaction with his wife, Sam Seder confronted Steven Crowder during his debate with Ethan Kline. There’s lore behind this event and everything, years-long unresolved and misrepresented matters. Crowder was visibly shaken during the brief exchange with Sam. Crowder leaned on being insulting, utilizing a manipulative tactic or two, and even making an anti-Semitic “joke.”
This man does not support equality in a marriage.
The gloves reference is to medication that his dogs needs. However she was concerned the medication would be harmful to her pregnancy. So she did not want to give the dog the medication. He said to out gloves on.
He has gone on his show and threatened to disclose her medical files. Implying she has “mental problems” so I guess she went to therapy. Probably because of him!
Scary. Extremely scary. I am beyond grateful I have had the therapy to avoid these relationships.
Thank you for this video. I had an argument like this with my ex. I'm glad you are breaking it down the way you are. It's really helpful. I was so confused when it happened and never really understood it until now.
He told her to go and do her wifely duties as he is lounging on the porch smoking in front of his very pregnant wife. he's not doing his husband duties of caring and protecting his wife.
thank you so much for these videos! I really appreciated you talking about people suspecting Crowder of physical abuse. I understand entirely where the suspicion comes from, but it does always imply (imo) that the victim is somehow diminished or less "harmed" if it isn't the case, which is terrible considering how many people have some biases about the truth of verbal abuse to begin with. Love your work as always, I really do appreciate hearing the thoughts of someone who is coming from a place of empathy towards situation rather than hatred toward Stephen Crowder. And I'm saying that as someone who can't stand him myself 😭
Thank you Dr. H
for me the verbal/emotional/psychological abuse by far left the deepest scars
What does that have to do about this case? Absolutely nothing. Abuse is abuse.
@@LeXXeD25 I'm directly responding to a statement Dr. Honda made in the video.
@@LeXXeD2517 minutes in Dr. Honda talks about it.
And agree. Laying hands leaves a lot of terror, but imo it doesn't leave you questioning your own intelligence/sanity/sense of self. It's all terrible though and I'm not real sure physical abuse ever DOESN'T have the mental component with it...seems like part and parcel imo
Steven crowder be like:
I'm only human after all. I'm only human after all. Don't put the blame on me. Don't put the blame on me
The I don’t love you and you’ve never shown me love… I’d turn and just walk out. Thats such a terrible awful manipulative thing to say. HE SHOULD UNDERSTAND THAT. Because he made a vow as did she on their wedding day ( im assuming they had a Christian wedding). It’s good she has this video. She should take him for what she can so she can care for her kids.
I work in DV services myself (I'm an administrator for a small non-profit that deals with DV mitigation, victim services, etc, in a very, VEEEERY rural and conservative region of the country).
I fully agree with practically everything you've said. I will say though, it does sound like your exposure to the dark side of "traditional values" has colored your view of more conservative minded people in general. And your reaction at the end, where you find it hard to even say you would hope your partner would value your relationship as much as you do, is perhaps evidence that you might be experiencing vicarious trauma (we watch our staff for that, and provide services when they need it. It is soooo easy for that to crop up.)
I think what you said in the first video, about digging down and getting to what they actually mean, as being paramount and important in helping resolve these issues before they even crop up. Something that pre-marriage counseling can help with, and I would encourage EVERYONE to go through either PM counseling, or an evidence based relationship course [be careful of the self help people doing it on the fly] of some kind before doing so, so you know what warning signs there are, and what you should expect out of a relationship and be expected to give in said relationship, how to set boundaries, conflict resolution strategies, and how much you might need to work on yourself before getting into that kind of relationship, or if your partner is ready as well, etc.
Just from my personal perspective, it feels like that perspective, that there is this almost cult like world view that gloms onto or hides inside political, religious, or other ideologies, is by far the better approach. Domestic violence is statistically, non-discriminatory when it comes to political perspective, religious affiliation, socio-economic status, etc. It exists in every part of society. And there are plenty of conservative minded, traditional family structure supporting people, who are wildly against that toxic, abusive, domineering relationship. They may say similar things to what people like Steven say, about supporting traditional family values, etc. But what they mean by those things, are worlds apart once you start digging deeper.
The reason I bring this up, is there are plenty of liberal abusers out there as well. They pay lip service to liberal causes, and then once you start digging deeper into what they mean when they say things, they're actually using those views to manipulate their partners, and controlling them. The LBGTQ community has a massive issue with abusers. That doesn't mean everyone who is LGBTQ are abusers. One is the other, the other is not the one. And I think that its important to make that distinction clear. Otherwise, we risk alienating entire segments of society, who will refuse to reach out for help, because they begin to think those offering services hate them, think less of them, or think that their views are backwards, degenerate, etc. We don't want that for the LGBTQ community at all. We want members of that community to reach out and get help when they need it.
The same goes for conservative families and victims.
A family who has more of a traditional family structure, and wants (together as partners) that structure for religious, self fulfillment, or other reasons, is not inherently toxic. What becomes toxic is the idea that any one sex is worth less, inherently. The idea of a cult like system, and deprograming them from that cult situation, is extremely apt. Its an analogy the local perpetrator therapists here, use as well.
Thank you for the video, and happy to see you are still making awesome educational content. Keep up the good work!
Fantastic work, Dr. Kirk. Have you ever connected with Mike David from Redbar Radio? Would love to see a collaborative psychoanalysis between you both!
Okay, as a southerner I’m surrounded by conservative men and none of them would deem his behavior as acceptable. Example- my mom is a doctor and my dad is very proud of her career success. And my grandpa led integration efforts at his engineering firm in the 1960’s. Just putting that out there lol
I'm glad to hear in all honesty
I am probably the Swedish equivalent of an American liberal, and I have both family members and friends who have both very liberal and very conservative views;
and to me, the important thing, in the end, is that people's views don't have a harmful impact on other people's lives.
The reason why I consider myself mostly a liberal is because it seems to me that liberals are generally more concerned about other people's well-being, and have a more open-minded attitude to minorities and oppressed demographics;
conservative views tend to be more close-minded, and less progressive, pretty much by definition, and this easily becomes a problem especially when it comes to things such as LGBT rights.
And here is the thing:
even if you are against ideas from the LGBT community, it isn't always appropriate to vocally express those views.
For example, if a teacher makes a big deal out of the fact that one of his/her students is a transgender man or transgender woman, then that student will feel attacked and mistreated, and this is always a problematic situation, because a teacher has no right to make students feel bad.
That part isn't even directly related to LGBT issues:
it is a simple matter of not being hurtful towards students.
That said, yes, of course there exist lunatics among liberals;
people who have strong enough opinions about anything at all will always develop some level of aggressive mentality.
Wow… this guy! We just found the missing link…. He’s in his own cult. It’s scary that some men are like this
the fact that doctor honda figured out the context of the “gloves” without knowing what it was about is amazing to me. so smart ❤
i think she didn’t want to give the dogs meds because the meds are unsafe for pregnant women! so he’s saying suck it up and put on gloves
having watched these two videos have been insightful. i think many times we go through drama with someone who seems evil its due to that person struggling to act in their own best interest unconsciously. like they know there is a problem with how they feel, often times there is truth to what they are implying, but they go about it in an unhealthy way. i am currently going through something similar with my brother. and its like when you discuss something it always is about painting him out to be some supreme victim, flip flopping in the conversation, and not having a clear goal or resolution. imo its a sign of deep emotional unconsciousness & immaturity
I love the fact that dr. Honda doesn't talk about the fact that she's pregnant because realistically speaking it shouldn't matter she should still be treated better. And I love that he said the way we think women used to be and used to be happy because there were so many women that weren't happy and didn't have a choice to have a career and there are so many men even today that would be so much happier as stay-at-home dads and if we could just ease up a little bit on the gender roles and the structure that these people keep trying to place Us in because they're too lazy to find partners that would actually just be happy in the roles that they're asking their partners to be in they want to force someone who isn't interested in doing those things to be in a relationship with them. It's not even a women's rights issue it's a men's rights issue too. people deserve to be happy in the roles that they choose to have in their relationships and their home and their workplace. And if you don't believe that you shouldn't be in a relationship with anyone in the first place. But when you're a whiny unhelpful dick all you have in a relationship is power over another person because you don't have any thing else to offer. The person who needs to work on becoming Worthy of someone else is him.
really appreciate Dr. Honda. not all psychologists are knowledgeable and willing to discuss sociological issues like sexism (see some other psychologists on YT)
Here I thought I couldn't hate Crowder more than I already do...
She is racking her brain to say the right thing and manage his responses. It’s like the T. rex scene from Jurassic Park.
That’s extremely unfair. He’s a monster.
I was married to a man like crowder. He would say “ if I’d known it was gonna be like this I never would have married you.” Usually always when I wouldn’t follow a command/demand. I finally realized the nice guy I dated did not exist. I finally responded to this statement “There’s the door. I don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me.” He didn’t leave but I filed for divorce and never saw him after all the papers were signed. I’m glad she’s decided to leave and doubly glad neither she nor her babies were injured by his abuse. I hope he gets supervised visitation only with the children.
You said something about him preferring to stay and argue instead of walking away, something like that and there's no rationalizing with him. And it reminded me of the segment he did going around universities and asking people to come argue with him I forgot the name it was like, "convince me I'm wrong" maybe you could watch that also Doc, to add on to your conceptualizations.
This is every conversation I ever had with my ex husband.
Worth mentioning this guy also shoved a man much older than himself, and then lied about it.
I do hope Hilary gets therapy before starting a new relationship or she will find herself in a cycle. She needs help as well.
I’ve been through this. And much MUCH worse. And the physical stuff, too.
Kirk, I’m with ya
At a minimum he shd know better. She is pregnant and it’s unhealthy for the baby for her to b stressed. That shows how selfish he is. Leave her alone!
I’ve been through a lot of conversations like this with family members and I have responded quite similarly to Hillary. I was never saying the things I said to appease the other person or deter escalation-I said them because I meant them and wanted the truth to be spoken and accepted. There’s also a degree of wanting to know that you’re doing the right thing so no one can guilt-trip you later.
Bro this isnt a psychologist its a politician. Lmao.
My mom was a Hillary. My brother became a Steven. I hate families.
Crowder makes me feel stressed in the final clip because there is something about his body language and tone that is unsettlingly manic.His expression is somewhere between suffering and anger. It looks like he gets himself really worked up and in a very heightened emotional state when he films these rants. I don’t find it very comfortable to watch. I find it really strange that he gets so worked up even when thinking about ‘women’ as an abstract collective.
What is the reason why for abusive behaviors to born Dr. Honda?
I know with my parents, the point of contention is that he worked and she didn't. That probably would add a lot of context in this situation. I'm sure since he makes all the money and provides everything, he hounds her to cook and do all the chores and to be his servant essentially. In a way the man is justified in wanting his wife to contribute, but in an abusive relationship, the man will take something that he is justified in, such as requesting she help out, and use it as a tool to own and control that person. The ironic thing is that the more they abuse and hound the wife, the more resentful she gets and the less likely it is that she will serve you food or do the laundry willingly- If you are loving, she will be much more likely to want to do nice things for you. It's actually a very touchy situation because you don't want a man to use the fact that hes providing to justify abusive behavior but at the same time, you dont want the wife to feel like she doesn't have to do anything and that he is a servant for her unemployed care-free living.
He continually plays victim and makes it all about me, me, me.
You can take pride in both but also you can’t take pride in both. It’s like the same. But different.