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According to the Bible, particularly in Luke 17:3-4, we are indeed instructed to forgive others only if they repent and ask for forgiveness; Jesus says, "If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.". This indicates that repentance is considered a necessary condition for granting forgiveness to someone who has wronged you.
Forgiveness is an act of kindness towards self, my abusers can’t come back until they are ready to reconcile, reconciliation requires accountability for one’s own actions and that is something they’re not capable of doing because they don’t have a repentant heart, we are commanded to forgive not reconcile.
Jordan Peterson said something along the lines of “You don’t have to forgive someone because they say sorry, you forgive someone when they repent of their actions and actually change”. But also it seems like most folks don’t have the guts to actually change
“Repentance is change of action”- Narcissists don’t understand this concept. If they’re seeking forgiveness, they should change their actions. If they’re not repenting, what’s there to forgive? Now, we can forgive on our end, but we don’t have to forget. If they don’t repent; if they don’t change their actions, then we can hold our boundaries and set up new boundaries to protect ourselves. God doesn’t require anyone to remain under oppression. It’s our God-given right to remove ourselves from oppression. And narcissistic abuse is one type of oppression.
BuT if there is no repentance, it must be on you solely to forgive them. The forgiveness they want won’t ever be reached anyhow, so you have to break off to the side, and learn what forgiveness truly looks like, & then do it…bc God forgave us. They won’t ever repent, so your future can’t ride on what they do. It’s what they want anyhow, bc if you don’t actually forgive them, then God will hold you truly accountable. And to some extent, from my experience, I’ve learned that I have an enemy in my narcissist. He truly made me his enemy, and has treated me as such, like I’m a sibling rival. It’s sad and sick. But that’s why I say YOU have to control the forgiveness YOU give. ✌🏼🩶🇺🇸
They say it should all be, "water under the bridge", that you're being "bitter and unforgiving", for even bringing up what they're doing the first time you bring it up, even though their behavior hasn't changed, and they haven't admitted to the behaviors. They can't deflect their actions that hard and nonstop without being aware that they are in fact doing them. If they thought the actions were innocent, they wouldn't be trying so hard to deny them, especially while turning tables on us, like we're doing something wrong. Lying about our behavior, telling us we're constantly doing things we're not. It's deranged behavior.
Yeah as I grew up as an adult I hammered that verse when my mother tried to convince me that I had to obey her when I was about 47 and I was living in my own place... I finally snapped and said no I don't because I don't live with you so that means I'm not a prisoner in your house anymore that means I don't have to obey your laws. And then I quoted and you fathers provoke not your children to wrath lest they be discouraged and I said today that you used your fist on me Mom it's the day that I became discouraged and lost faith in my parents and lost faith in the system. But one thing that you did not succeed in doing is ruining my faith in my Abba Yahuah TMH. I said you failed at your mission. Try that again and if you ever invade my space and invade my apartment without my permission I will be pressing charges and you will be going to jail. Oh yeah narcissus abuse was nasty in the household and even after I moved out of the house she kept doing it by invading my space.. if she ever does that again I promise I will press charges I don't give a rat's Hoot about the consequences she will be facing jail time.
@@CrunchyCrumblesASMR which people leave the and your father's provoke not your children to wrath les they be discouraged. They sure want to cherry-pick don't they?! 😡
Going on 27 years of Narc abuse. Two suicide attenpts (many years ago) 2 mental breakdowns, plathora of health issues and an awakening to the truth that almost broke me mentally, im climbing out of the madness. Scripture is the help and healing that is mending the mind mess that has been created. One day I pray to be free fully and thriving. Praying for each person who faces this horror, male or female. We all have endured hell on earth.
I know exactly what you are going through, 12 years of deep darkness & Spiritual Negativity by my baby mother. I also know witchcraft is involved. God Awakened me with the darkness & brought me into his Marvelous Light & Salvation. He Chose me.
My ex used to leave notes all around the house for me to find which said "the truth shall set you free" as if he knew something I didnt or trying to imply that I had something to confess to him when in actual fact it turned out he had three other women he was sleeping with behind my back. Funny thing is when I found out this information the Truth actually did set me free, we dont even speak anymore and when I see him I cant even imagine why I was ever interested in the first place, Thankyou Jesus for Setting me free for you are the way the TRUTH and the life and I love you so much Lord Amen
Sometimes what they say to you to manipulate you backfires on them. My ex used to constantly say I was selfish, a bad commutator, that I was illogical. He would blame all our arguments on my period. Well, over time I became generous, good at communication, and very logical.
Of course when I was walking away from a narcissist I got the "and you call yourself a Christian " I turned smiled and said "judge not lest you be judged" she had a look of pure shock on her face as I turned and walked away.
I had a similar encounter with the one I gotta deal with, but their response was a sinister smirk followed by them saying "you're finally learning how this game is played."
@@ingridgallagher1029 Yeah, I wanted to use Morse code to tell them not to be like that - that is, Morse code using my fist on their face. I controlled myself though so they got nothing from me (grey stone I think the therapists call it).
My husband always tells me I don't know how to love neither how to be loved😊. The last time he said it to me I told him...yes, I don't know. Please teach me how
Yes, yes, yes! I’m SO glad someone else has pointed out the last “twisted scripture,” the “Honor thy father and thy mother.” That is the most misused of them all. In fact, they may have the “honor thy father and mother part down” (or think they do), but they do not read the line that comes AFTER that verse, which is “Do not provoke thy children to anger.”
They twist the word “ honor” to mean “obey,” even fir their adult married children. John Bevere wrote a book called Honors Reward. He says, after much study on honor, he concluded it basically means “to show value.”
Yep describes my experience growing up and into adulthood...i got yelled at by my dad in my 30's that i wasn't honoring my father or mother every time I had an alternate thought, feeling, opinion, Likes or dislikes, or just tried to maintain my own boundaries and independence separate from their control. They just wanted 100% obedience and subservience, a robot. He'd tell me how disrespectful I was and not honoring them. Heaven forbid i ever said "no". That was blasphemy that unleashed wrath and punishment.
Respond back to her, “Takes one to know one.” The difference is which sinners have repented and surrendered to Christ Jesus? Also, Jesus tells believers to judge among believers and test the spirits. We absolutely are taught and commanded to deal with sin within the Church(Body of Believers). How else can one be cast out of the Church if they refuse to repent? This is a lie from Satan that silences many believers. We are not to condemn another but we most certainly should be aware of what spirit is operating in them. Some will be restored to the Lord or else, at least, they are no longer being allowed into fellowship to spread their evil. A little leaven spoils the loaf.
@@melissaculpepper7663 My husband always came with biblical advice to me to shut me up. Thanks to knowing Jesus and the scripture I had good arguments I could stand against his manipulations. But he never would have let me convince him from anything that would have lead in repentence. No way! Instead he ghosted me every time he ran out of arguments. While I waited for him to return for talking about our issues and prayed for guidance and wisdom, he came back saying nothing pretending nothing had happened. It is useless discussing. You can't reach out to their twisted mind. You can't encounter a sick attitude in a healthy way of discussion. Just God can convince and heal them. Everything else is throwing pearls to the pigs. Shake the dust of the feet and leave the narcissist up to God.
Mark Drischoll is my favorite of all the big online preachers. Mark said that a narcasist uses scripture to convict you, but never themselves. I agree 100% with his statement. My deceased mother in law was an absolute narcky, and every time my wife and I would visit her mother, she always had a list of the peoples who had wronged her in the last week or so. She never looked inwards to herself, no personal analaysis at all.
There's no safe Haven living with narcissist parents... As I gotten older I learned this scripture answer not a fool accordingly to its folly unless you become likewise as unto them so I just told him why I turned my back on them and turn my back on them I had enough of their bull. I was always treated like the outcast anyhow it doesn't bother me cuz I know that I was the hated child anyhow... It's no skin off my back and no skin off my nose being forced to live with them by the state and me not knowing what type of people they were was mainly the state's fault for not screening these people before placing my sibling and I and their custody
@@MelissaWarriorNotes I told mine to kiss off when they tried to tell me that I had to obey them even though I was living in my own place. Adult are tired of hearing it. Adult children are tired of hearing it and dealing with it. Especially when it comes from a narcissist, that do not do what the father says anyway. Why are we Forced to listen to these creeps? They are hypocrites telling us that we are the problem when in fact they are the problem.
When a narcissist tries to manipulate scripture for their benefit against me, I prayed about it. I found Isaiah 41:11-12. That is their fate unless they repent, accept responsibility for their actions, and submit to the Almighty God.
@@NLC0413 very true!! But most adults use it as a sledgehammer!! Until the children take that sledgehammer out of their hands using it on them! 😡 People are getting tired of it! 😡
My go to response for the demonic narcissistic scripture manipulation for power and control is always: “Yes, I’m your child, but I’m no longer a child. I’m now an adult with my own thoughts and opinions and can express them just like any other adult.” This is my way to even the playing field and so far it’s worked every time with the narcissist from stopping 🛑 them to try and usurp my authority in my life ✋🏼!
I'm a minister of a Christian church and my narcissistic daughter says to me 'I should love her unconditionally'. She is almost 30! I say that only God can do that and although I have love and compassion for her struggles with mental health, it does not mean I am a doormat and come to her beck and call. Praying for her and believing God will intervene by his Holy Spirit.
@@MichelleCasandraMindofChrist that is not correct. I believe you are confusing love with eternal life with God. Consider the words of Jeffery Dahlmer’s dad; I do not approve of what he did, but he is my son and I love him. I firmly and Biblically believe this is how God loves us. We are His children, and even we don’t believe in Him, even if He knows we will perish He still “”loves” us, unconditionally. But that does not mean we automatically inherit eternal life - THAT is what is conditional, and He still loves us. peace
I'm aware of a situation where the wife is the narcissist and the husband is the victim. And this was a military guy! I'm in prayer all the time for this family!!
Just met my estranged step daughter in law . She was abusive and some one stole my medication. She’s moving to the area. She wanted to camp in the driveway while she builds a house. Nooooo . Boundaries needed. Hod showed me she’s a theif , liar, and sadly she adopted a child to cure her empty nest syndrome. That child is ignored when she’s not showing her off.
I think you're talking about me. I met my wife in the military she was military, too. Controlled me like an R/C car. I had a child's cell phone so she could monitor everything and would block my phone from calling her or anyone when she got upset.
"Leave and cleave" was used repeatedly by my soon to be ex-wife to try to convince me that I was commanded to cut off all ties to my family and previous relationships. It was a pathetic attempt to isolate me.
When my daughter remarried I was told "you're not immediate family".... have not been invited to the house for ANYTHING and she no longer recognizes me as a mom, friend or family member. This affects my grandchildren as well. It's been going on since 2012. We were very close and enjoyed one another .... but it came to a complete halt 😮 Destroyed me for a while. I cried a lot and begged God for understanding. Fast forward to 2024.... less tears for me but heartache 💔 is real. I cannot allow it to dictate my life. I'm moving forward and gonna be about the Father's business until THAT DAY ☝️ I just pray for answers and want the painful episodes of abandonment to stop. She's my only child (2 grandchildren...grown now but much affected in the negative. No relationship anymore 😢) I am learning to walk in a constant state of repentance and forgiveness.... in every matter. ☝️💔💖 NEVER in a million years would I have thought my family would be destroyed like this 😕 I am ALONE but not LONELY...I have Jesus Christ and HE FILLS MY EVERY NEED. ☝️💖 I just miss my daughter and grandchildren. Any suggestions?? Texas Nana Psalm 91
His past mistakes that needed to be left in the past since he didn't like talking about them can be as far back as 1 minute..."it is in the past, forget about it already!"
I think that is the bible my mother reads. She has said all of those twisted scriptures to me many times. Just two weeks ago she texts me saying God calls us to forgive... and forget...I have been struggling on how to honor her. I don't like her. she is evil and downright mean to me! she cuts off communication with me to punish me, I'm tired of it... I am 60 years old and still a sad hurt child... I am a Christian, I just need to focus on the Lord and stay in His word daily... Sometimes I just get stuck in a cloud of depression. Thank you, I certainly needed to hear this today... The twisted bible verses were spot on.
There is something wrong with her generation. So many of my friends share the same experience. I know it feels sad that she's not a true mother, but as long a you keep trying or expecting her to be, she won't. It's not in her. God gives everyone free will. You have to accept what she's chosen to do with hers and move on. Don't give her your energy. People like that will literally suck the life from you. What's helped me is calmly addressing my mom's hypocrisy directly in the moment as she's doing it so she can't escape. It's caused her to back up 10 paces. It let's her know I see exactly what she doing, but I leave her no attitude to try to guilt me about, etc. You are worthy of love. Don't focus on where it's not. Focus on where it is. Peace to you.
Thank you for bringing up “Honour your Mother & Father”. I moved away from my parents with my husband and kids at 38 years of age. I was constantly told I’m not honouring and that I was selfish for moving away. I needed this 🩷
But being able to detect the lies is only 1/2 of the battle. The other 1/2 is understanding how to respond to these lies. In this, the most effective scripture is “Answer not a fool, according to his folly, lest you be like him yourself. Answer a fool, according to his folly lest he be wise in his own eyes.” Prov 26:4-5 It takes great discernment to be able to do this effectively, and to know when to apply the answering of the fool in this case, the narcissist, and when not to answer the narcissist in their continuous and never ending lies.
In Mark 3: 35 Jesus says “ for whoever does the will of God is my brother, sister, and mother”. In Mathew 10:36 Jesus states “ a man’s enemies will be members of his own household”. Narcissists, who are people of the lie and creatures of chaos, do Satan’s bidding in order to keep others from their God given destiny by engineering perpetual turmoil. Focus on Jesus and not on the storm and pray like your life depends on it because it does. God absolutely will carry you through and bring you out from under their controlling influence and the narcissist will become ensnared in the traps they set out for others. Have faith, do not despair, believe and it will be done, for we worship a mighty and just God who detests evil. Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to give you hope and a future”.
So good. And here's yet another scripture that needs to be heeded. Thou shalt not have any other gods before Me. Narcissist demand worship. They like their father the enemy, want/demand worship. They want to enslave people.. to bow down to them. For the Christian, this is Idol worship. Idolatry. They're aligned with their father like you say. Continuing to entertain the Narcissists will definitely keep one from completing their God appointed assignment on the earth which is the enemy's goal.
I filed for legal separation because I am trying to leave without harm. My abusive husband bashes me with the Bible verse, “God hates divorce.” He can’t stand that I refuse to backdown from my decision to leave him.
Paul’s epistles list numerous acceptable reasons for divorce. If a believer is engaged in ongoing unrepentant sin of any kind then you may treat them as an unbeliever. If you married to an unbeliever you are allowed to divorce them and remarry. Therefore, if your spouse is engaged in ongoing unrepentant sin against you then you can treat them like an unbeliever. You can divorce them and, if you choose, remarry. “God hates divorce.” Is not the only relevant scripture.
@@Dagnymarie1I had some in laws say this to me. And I said God hates liars abusers manipulators infidels...and all of a sudden, I heard so you see we have all sinned😂.... I said wow... no wonder their brother isnt moved by my pains. They just wanted me to go back to his house. After the scripure thing wasnt working (thank God for Kris and counselling), it got to mix of culture and scripture also- honour elders we have begged you over and over. 😳 Then I am asked, whether I even bother about how he is feeding..I was shocked , my mental.gealth that almost got me to a dangerous point was less important... They need me to go care for his sexual appetite ( am I a prostitute 😢)
@@patienceoyeleye5736 Leslie Vernick is a great resources for Christians in destructive relationships. (Anyone could benefit from her info but she addresses what the Bible really says)
Kris, this is priceless. Your videos are such helpful, healthy tools for those of us dealing with narcissists. I wish I had someone like you in my 20s to guide me to set boundaries. As I got closer to 50 years old, I felt I should be healed by now and I wasn't. I hadn't even begun to process the decades of abuse. So, I began writing about it. I prayed the Lord would use this time to help me to process, grieve and eventually heal, finally, from this pain. We will see where the Lord leads. If it gets published and helps others feel less alone, praise God! If it doesn't and it was simply for my own healing process, praise God! It's so important to tell our stories and not suffer in silence. God bless you for being an educated voice of reason and for pointing to the Lord!
I can relate to these, but the one my parents used on me to keep me in a very bad place was “rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft “. Being rebellious was the last thing I wanted to do, so they were able to get me to do anything for them.
People are using scripture, twisting it to suit their needs their wants. This is so good! In so many avenues of our life this happens, Narcs are everywhere! Once you see it, you can't unsee it. Literally surrounded. I'm just now starting to understand why Jesus will say depart from me I never knew you. I didn't understand how it could be possible. But never thought about it, that Satan tried to pull that with Jesus. Love these videos.
I became a widow 4 years ago my husband and I were unable to have children. It has been shocking to me how many people have come out of the woodwork wanting a variety of things from me to serve their desires or needs because I have no husband or children. And using scripture to validate their request. The most frequent one is concerning money to sell all that I have- my home and my possessions and give it to the poor, of course they are the poor that they are talking about. When I asked what they thought I should do if I became penniless their reply has been they have a shed in the backyard without any electricity or running water that I could live in or some more generous- a back bedroom I could live in. Of course I laughed at such an idea . Out of sarcasm I felt like answering them that would be too good for me, don't they have a dog run I can live in but of course as a Christian I did not respond that way. Money hasn't been the only issue, some of them have been about ways in which they can fill my day being their personal assistant taking care of responsibilities for them. Again the scripture be a servant to all. I am very grateful to the Holy Spirit for giving me an answer to these people, and that is - I will ask the Lord if this is something I should do or not. And I do ask the Lord, most of the time I hear no this is a yoke they are putting on you not something I am asking of you. Some of the time I am to serve and I do it willing but with healthy boundaries.
There’s a lot of people that make believe that they are genuine and believe in God and around to help humanity when all they’re out is to help themselves only. It’s very sad.
No one expects to discover they were deceived into a marriage by a wolf disguised in sheep's clothing. To discover that is what has in fact occurred, is incredibly traumatising on so many levels. Unfortunately, there are some denominations that totally rely on these exact twists of scripture, in order to keep women and children in bondage to manipulative abusers, because it suits those in power within those very churches to keep it that way. THANK YOU for posting this video.
They also want to lead you into sin. My ex told me he wanted to be the kind of husband that if he came home and caught me in bed with another man, he'd still want to stay together. I was so shocked and disgusted.
That's a hallmark of the personality of an unclean spirit. Filthy. That's a part of how unclean spirits in the Narcissist moves. Always Always some aspect of sexual impurity however it manifest. Perversion of God's design for s#x / sexuality.
I thought it was only my soon-to-be ex who said this. "If I come home and find you in bed with another man, I would close the door, and hope he satisfied you." What?!?!? He said it with a complete straight face and honest tone. Didn't not hear himself? What twisted thinking! He was trying to give me permission to cheat so he would feel better about it himself.
Have heard 1 and 2 repeatedly. Yet they will never read the scriptures that pertain to their own bad behavior - like drinking, fighting, lewdness, etc. After several years, I think it is finally time to go "no contact." They will never change. Thanks Kris. Just started watching your videos a day ago. They are the best.
Also conveniently ignored is Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
Understanding Narcissism A narcissist lives in a fantasy world where he is a king in his court of slaves. He is superior and in control of them. So, any nonsubmission, disobedience, inattention, opposition, criticism, competition, defeat, disrespect, or even trying to be an equal is not tolerated and he will react with “narcissistic rage”. The Narcissist’s true self is broken and disgusting, and he sees this. This causes him intolerable shame and pain when he thinks of it or if others recognize it. This makes him chronically miserable, and envious of other “normal” people. This second false self of a king is a fake one he invented to mask the true one and stop the pain and shame. Its characteristics are the opposite of what he sees in his true self. It is omnipotent, great, all-knowing, highly successful, beautiful, unique, infallible, enviable, indispensable to others, in control, and charming. This second self is so fragile because it is fake. And he is willing to do anything even murder to hide the true self and show the other false one. Narcissistic supply is the continuous supply he needs from people to prop up this fake image and numb his pain. He needs it to prove to himself and to others that this second false self is real and to hide the true one. Every situation for him is a struggle to get this supply. Having a slave provides him with narcissistic supply. It is in his own interest that you become isolated, weak, afraid, dependent, inferior, broken, and a failure so that you conform to the role of a slave to the king. So, he studies you and then manipulates you to trap and destroy you to conform to that role. To do so he uses isolation, intimidation, gas lighting, Scapegoating, idealization (love bombing)/devaluation/discard cycles, criticism, projection, displacement, physical abuse, humiliation, lying, insults, judging, boundary violation, bragging, smearing, triangulation or giving you the silent treatment. In his eyes you are not a human with feelings, dignity and rights; you are just a source of supply. He lacks any empathy towards you. Imagine a hot air balloon on which an image of a king is drawn with an ugly deformed monkey hiding inside the balloon. It needs continuous inflation, which your job in life is to provide, or what’s inside would be seen.
SO SPOT ON. I just lived through this for 6 years, which ended 2 days ago. Yah told me to leave, and I did. This time for GOOD. My Father in Heaven with guide. 🙏🏾
This was my entire life with my Mom. So hard to deal with and undo. I’m still on my healing journey with this and having a hard time knowing what is truth.
God's word is truth, but read it for yourself. Ask the spirit to teach you and be patient with yourself if you aren't sure you understand it well. It's okay to be still and know that God is God. Actually it's commanded.
NTV😅love it. The weaponize everything-especially God and His Word. Forgiveness doesn't mean you're going forward with them-THEY believe you'll just keep putting up with them-forever
My dad has a few cherry picked bible verses that he clings to in order to continue his abusive behavior because he thinks that Jesus paid for his sins and therefore he doesn’t need to change. He has no interest in hearing ALL of the other scriptures that say we must be born again, put off the old man, put off all anger, malice, etc. etc. and when I bring it up he gets infuriated and goes into a fit of rage, mocking me and saying that I’m so self righteous.
Endured this for 30 years. Never knew it was a mental condition. Always thought something was wrong with me. Now waking up to this new information and trying to heal my wounded soul. 🙏🏻
This is the first time I understand what is going on with a Narcissists in my life! Thank you for this amazing video!! I will keep studying this content and viewing all videos available!!
Heard that. “What are you always so offended and unforgiving”…. Abuse, manipulation and affairs as well as stealing form me they wonder why I’m offended?! I do forgive but I’m not fool enough to let them back blindly
We're supposed to forgive them just so they can feel better about themselves and then they can do it all over again and then lay all the blame on us and pount out and twist every single thing from our past since childhood.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
I'm sorry about what you're going through. Praying for peace & reconciliation. I sincerely hope for the best for each of you, regardless of what God's plan is for each of you. God Bless. Be the light that washes away the darkness. 💕🙏🏼😇
I grew up in church, and i rarely saw a wife submit to their husband. They all treated their husband like they are too stupid to know they are being disrespected.
My narcisist brother just to quote the comandment of honor your parents to make me give my time and money to my mom when i didnt have any, making me feel bad about not helping out, he just to always talk about family unity and he was the first one to throw you under the bus when things didnt go well in the family
Thank you so much for #4. I just found you this past week and heard this one today. I Just turned 46 and with a lifetime of disabilities was treated exactly as described. 24 brought me a great awakening but has left me so worried about my exit solely wrapped up on that area of scripture. You don't know how much this message has cleared my mind and spirit. I'm so grateful to you for this. God Bless You Breaking chains in Michigan
Oh my goodness! He used number 3 every day! Claiming that it was written in that specific order so that the man cannot honour the woman until she submits to him. She must submit first before he will show her respect or honour! This in conjunction with women being the weaker/lesser vessel, the clone, that through which sin entered the world. That being said, I did submit and he still didn't respect me. So glad to be out of that! Thank you so much for this video, I wasn't crazy!
Bless you sister. Women aren't clones, we literally were taken out of Adam's body-"So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:27). Also, "So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” (Genesis 2:21-23). Another thing, sin entered the world through one MAN, Adam, not a woman. Eve was deceived but Adam commited high Treason against The Lord-"Because of this, just as sin entered into the world through one man, and death through sin, so also death passed to all men, because all sinned." ( Roman's 5:12). Remember, we are all supposed to be ONE in Christ Jesus, where there are no males that are better than women." There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus." (Galatians 3:28). Some men want to use your gender against you (which is an offense to the God who made you) and submit to them the way they perceive what submit means from their spirit of control lense. Our first priority is to submit to God before man, even ones own husband. 🙏
Yep they beat you over the head with the Bible but never admit to any of their wrongdoings.. that goes on all the time in every family and I'm just getting sick of it.. I was talking to one this evening complaining about his divorce oh I wonder why they got a divorce.hmm hmm because his wife got tired of him Bible thumping over her head!!
Amen. Narcissists misuse scripture constantly. Don't fall for it. Yesterday i finally decided to make a video addressing Narcissists on my channel. I usually discuss issues regarding exposing darkness in this world (Ephesians 5:11), but I've recently felt the Lord urging me to expose narcissism and help others. I'm going through it. I understand and want to help others. I'm so glad i came across this channel. Great job
Lol. I love this. I do know the Narcissist Twisted Version! and for Almost everyday of our almost 42 years together. My self-righteous christian husband (who by-the-way says preachers are wrong to devalue the older brother of the Prodigal son, because the older brother had a right to be angry - because the older brother has done everything right) would choose a Bible verse for our daily devotions and point his finger at my nose telling me how I am not up-to-standard on this and better improve. He would do this in front of our children. It took maybe 30 years before I put a stop to this in our daily Bible devotions. Yes, I know, I am a slow learner. But then I came from a narcissistic physically, verbally and emotionally abusive childhood home to just a verbally and emotionally abusive home. I thought I did better. My concern is how it has affected my three children.
#3 is a big one for my narc husband. He is constantly throwing that one at me basically telling me that no matter what I am to submit to him and let him lead even though that has lead to all our money and savings being spent and our family nearly being homeless. But it’s all my fault because I am a worthless wife who won’t submit
@@KourtneyMEmmert You would be better served not to repeat his negative words, out loud or in your head. Instead, ask Jesus to heal your memories of those evil comments and replace them with Godly things. And you please pray for your husband, especially when he says things you know are untrue about you. Learn the Hail Mary if you don't already know it. She is our spiritual mother, given to us all as Jesus was dying on the cross for all our salvation. Ask her to give him the Grace to change his ways and you to have the continuing Graces of strength and patience while she works to soften his heart. Mary is a miracle worker ... my formerly verbally abusive alcoholic husband of over 30 years is making astounding changes! I had set aside my Cradle Catholic roots to be with him and endured decades of this type of abuses (and learned to dish out some pretty awful stuff myself in misguided self defense!) But I finally was given the Grace to stand up for myself and put God first. And started praying for his conversion ... a 54 Day Novena. Along about day 52, he suddenly announced that he thought we should have a statue of Mary beside the tiny pond in the middle of our circle driveway!! You have to understand how crazy that statement was ... we're old/junk car collectors in a rural area with no real lawn and certainly no statues. We have dogs and poultry and cars! But you better believe I wasted no time helping him find a statue and there she stands, a visual reminder of her spiritually watching over his progress!!! He had given up alcohol over a year before and truly is becoming a better person daily. He also was willing to Convalidate our civil marriage in the eyes of the Catholic Church. And a few months later, thanks to Father Staples (yes, Tim Staples brother) meeting with him privately for weekly for months to Catachise him, my husband came into the Catholic Church in May of 2023! The Lord has done great things for us and Holy is His name! Hail Mary, full of Grace The Lord is with thee Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus Holy Mary, mother of God Pray for us now and at the hour of our death Amen And thanks, blessed Mother, for taking my husband by the hand and leading him to your Son!!!
My boss told me she wants to bring God’s value to workplace. She is at church every week, goes to major Christian festivals, but then continues to be the narcissist she always has been. It did make me wonder why God allows it, and for a little while my faith was paper thin. I’m just glad I’m back now and listening to this. Thank you.
Every time my parent used the honor your parents I'd use the don't nag your kids one and they never accepted it due to that meant they'd have to back off on their inappropriate demands.
I am a firm believer in playing by the rules of your opponents while never accepting their premises. You did the right thing here, I think- you rejected their premise that you must always "honor" them by doing everything they want you to do, while showing them a passage that effectively did the same thing to them. I'm not saying you yourself was trying to distort or twist the Bible for your own sake. I'm saying that it is fair game to do so in order to show their folly. Remember Proverbs 26:4-5. I hope all is well with you and yours.
You're a wise woman. The "Judge Not Lest Ye be Judged" is a weapon wielded by the fool. To make a narcissist self immolate simply quote 1 Corinthians 2: 15
Had one who threatened to kill my sisters family confront me with "Jesus says you can't stop me!" I responded "I will be glad to send you on your way to plead your case!"
Miss Reece , those of us who wear the armour of God are compelled to heal and protect the weak who suffer the evils this life is filled with. You are doing wonders by reaching people through technology. Bless you and may your reach encompas the world.
Yah, disgraced ministry leader Bill Gothard said that to my face when I questioned his ministry morality. I'll never forget that interaction, even 25 years later.
Every time you say "twisted scripture" in this video it reminds me of the band Twisted Sister....and I can't help but imagine my own twisted sister getting together with other twisted sisters and forming a band called "Twisted Scripture" lol :)))....Forgive me...I didn't get enough sleep last night and I get a bit slap happy when sleep deprived.
This is so accurate,yet sp scary.My ex-husband said the same things 😮 I had no idea so many people are dealing with this type of abuse....I hope we all heal,it's very hard.😢😢
I got so sucked into my girlfriend's world that she was all I could think about. It got so bad I couldn't even pray period when I could finally see who she really is , I was quickly found in violation . She quickly attacked every aspect of my life including my religion
The verses pertaining to forgiveness in the Bible have a caveat everyone seems to miss: the offender MUST REPENT first!!!!! IF the offender does not repent of their offense against you, then you owe them NO forgiveness. Universal blanket forgiveness is not even offered by God. Scripture is also clear that we are to judge one another according to the commandments; Lawless churches do not honor this.
Hi Kris I want to say that since I subscribed to your channel am getting empowered alot in regards to narcissism and good thing is that you are a Christian and using biblical principles in explaining and teaching about it. Kindly do an episode about dealing with narcissistic parents as a Christian how should we deal with a narcissistic mom or dad and siblings too. God bless you
Am I a People Pleaser Quiz? Discover Your Type.
krisreece.com/am-i-a-people-pleaser/
Conquering Codependency Biblically Online Course
krisreece.com/conquering-codependency/
Hell NO!
Beware the false prophet.
ua-cam.com/video/sUhX_O2TnnM/v-deo.html
No
According to the Bible, particularly in Luke 17:3-4, we are indeed instructed to forgive others only if they repent and ask for forgiveness; Jesus says, "If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.". This indicates that repentance is considered a necessary condition for granting forgiveness to someone who has wronged you.
Mine a pastor - girlfriend
For the forgiveness part, I also would like to add that they view forgiveness as a freepass to keep up their mistreatment of you.
Forgiveness is an act of kindness towards self, my abusers can’t come back until they are ready to reconcile, reconciliation requires accountability for one’s own actions and that is something they’re not capable of doing because they don’t have a repentant heart, we are commanded to forgive not reconcile.
So so true! Mine too...i cant get thise wirds out his mouth fOR ANYTHING! thats really crazy! I @lakevahopps7120
Jordan Peterson said something along the lines of “You don’t have to forgive someone because they say sorry, you forgive someone when they repent of their actions and actually change”. But also it seems like most folks don’t have the guts to actually change
They typically believe the once saved always saved myth as well. License to commit all sin.
“Repentance is change of action”- Narcissists don’t understand this concept. If they’re seeking forgiveness, they should change their actions. If they’re not repenting, what’s there to forgive?
Now, we can forgive on our end, but we don’t have to forget. If they don’t repent; if they don’t change their actions, then we can hold our boundaries and set up new boundaries to protect ourselves.
God doesn’t require anyone to remain under oppression. It’s our God-given right to remove ourselves from oppression. And narcissistic abuse is one type of oppression.
They want you to forgive but they never admit that they did anything wrong. What, then, is there to forgive? Repentance is required.
@@sleeperno1215 and to recognize their actions and stop repeating repeatedly repeating…
BuT if there is no repentance, it must be on you solely to forgive them. The forgiveness they want won’t ever be reached anyhow, so you have to break off to the side, and learn what forgiveness truly looks like, & then do it…bc God forgave us.
They won’t ever repent, so your future can’t ride on what they do. It’s what they want anyhow, bc if you don’t actually forgive them, then God will hold you truly accountable. And to some extent, from my experience, I’ve learned that I have an enemy in my narcissist. He truly made me his enemy, and has treated me as such, like I’m a sibling rival. It’s sad and sick. But that’s why I say YOU have to control the forgiveness YOU give. ✌🏼🩶🇺🇸
They say it should all be, "water under the bridge", that you're being "bitter and unforgiving", for even bringing up what they're doing the first time you bring it up, even though their behavior hasn't changed, and they haven't admitted to the behaviors. They can't deflect their actions that hard and nonstop without being aware that they are in fact doing them. If they thought the actions were innocent, they wouldn't be trying so hard to deny them, especially while turning tables on us, like we're doing something wrong. Lying about our behavior, telling us we're constantly doing things we're not. It's deranged behavior.
@@lauragraves4342 I was discarded for three years. When I refused the Hoover, “I am bitter and unforgiving.” I kid you not.
Thank you!
“Honor thy father and mother AND provoke not your child to wrath” Ephesians 6:2-4
Hello?
Exactly narcissists parents do not keep that scripture at all.. if they claim to believe in the father they lie the truth is not in them.
Yes! I was so mad when I grew up, read that and realized how they had abused this scripture.
Yeah as I grew up as an adult I hammered that verse when my mother tried to convince me that I had to obey her when I was about 47 and I was living in my own place... I finally snapped and said no I don't because I don't live with you so that means I'm not a prisoner in your house anymore that means I don't have to obey your laws.
And then I quoted and you fathers provoke not your children to wrath lest they be discouraged and I said today that you used your fist on me Mom it's the day that I became discouraged and lost faith in my parents and lost faith in the system. But one thing that you did not succeed in doing is ruining my faith in my Abba Yahuah TMH. I said you failed at your mission. Try that again and if you ever invade my space and invade my apartment without my permission I will be pressing charges and you will be going to jail. Oh yeah narcissus abuse was nasty in the household and even after I moved out of the house she kept doing it by invading my space.. if she ever does that again I promise I will press charges I don't give a rat's Hoot about the consequences she will be facing jail time.
Honor and obey are not synonymous!
@@CrunchyCrumblesASMR which people leave the and your father's provoke not your children to wrath les they be discouraged. They sure want to cherry-pick don't they?! 😡
Going on 27 years of Narc abuse. Two suicide attenpts (many years ago) 2 mental breakdowns, plathora of health issues and an awakening to the truth that almost broke me mentally, im climbing out of the madness. Scripture is the help and healing that is mending the mind mess that has been created. One day I pray to be free fully and thriving. Praying for each person who faces this horror, male or female. We all have endured hell on earth.
Praying for you earnestly..be encouraged your not alone in your battle. Not only is Jesus with you others are enduring similar trials..in Christ
I know exactly what you are going through, 12 years of deep darkness & Spiritual Negativity by my baby mother. I also know witchcraft is involved. God Awakened me with the darkness & brought me into his Marvelous Light & Salvation. He Chose me.
God bless you
@Daniel-lv6fl thank you truly thank you for the prayers and words of encouragement
@DivineIntervention777 praying for you, for us all who have endured this hell on earth
They twist scripture for control.
Sounds like most American Charismatic Pastors. !🙄
@@roboparks Right! TBT
@@roboparksyep
And then when you disagree with them they block you so when you try to leave a message you see an error has occurred.
My ex used to leave notes all around the house for me to find which said "the truth shall set you free" as if he knew something I didnt or trying to imply that I had something to confess to him when in actual fact it turned out he had three other women he was sleeping with behind my back. Funny thing is when I found out this information the Truth actually did set me free, we dont even speak anymore and when I see him I cant even imagine why I was ever interested in the first place, Thankyou Jesus for Setting me free for you are the way the TRUTH and the life and I love you so much Lord Amen
Yes! Whatever they accuse you of, they are usually doing!
I had a similar situation
sorry, that does sound like you weren't listening.... men who F around like that are Angry - at you !!!
Sometimes what they say to you to manipulate you backfires on them. My ex used to constantly say I was selfish, a bad commutator, that I was illogical. He would blame all our arguments on my period.
Well, over time I became generous, good at communication, and very logical.
@@sherrydickie8459exactly
Of course when I was walking away from a narcissist I got the "and you call yourself a Christian " I turned smiled and said "judge not lest you be judged" she had a look of pure shock on her face as I turned and walked away.
I had a similar encounter with the one I gotta deal with, but their response was a sinister smirk followed by them saying "you're finally learning how this game is played."
@@flintwestwood3596 oof! That's way creepy.
@@ingridgallagher1029 Yeah, I wanted to use Morse code to tell them not to be like that - that is, Morse code using my fist on their face. I controlled myself though so they got nothing from me (grey stone I think the therapists call it).
Grey rock, actually@@flintwestwood3596
😄👌🏼
Amen, Amen!!!! The narcissists accuse us of not loving but are the meanest people of all.
So true and so unfortunate.
My husband always tells me I don't know how to love neither how to be loved😊. The last time he said it to me I told him...yes, I don't know. Please teach me how
@@mayruthuganda smart answre!
@@mayruthugandathis is almost word for word what mine says.
So true Whoever they can use to get what they want they will
“The version where they take God‘s truth and distort it beyond recognition to suit their narrative” 0:18 😮 wow. NAILED IT.!!!
Truth n lies mixed together... Satan's favorite pastime and weapon.
That is so true...
Yeah, I've heard it said that 90% of what the devil tells you is true...so that he can deceive you with the remaining 10%!
Yes, yes, yes! I’m SO glad someone else has pointed out the last “twisted scripture,” the “Honor thy father and thy mother.” That is the most misused of them all. In fact, they may have the “honor thy father and mother part down” (or think they do), but they do not read the line that comes AFTER that verse, which is “Do not provoke thy children to anger.”
They twist the word “ honor” to mean “obey,” even fir their adult married children. John Bevere wrote a book called Honors Reward. He says, after much study on honor, he concluded it basically means “to show value.”
Giiirll! I inwardly crack up when people attempt to use this one against me and I mentally quote 'THAT ONE'.
😂😂😂😂😅😆😆
Also, the original reading states Obey ... "In the Lord".
Some verses omit it and the devils jump on it.
Yep describes my experience growing up and into adulthood...i got yelled at by my dad in my 30's that i wasn't honoring my father or mother every time I had an alternate thought, feeling, opinion, Likes or dislikes, or just tried to maintain my own boundaries and independence separate from their control. They just wanted 100% obedience and subservience, a robot. He'd tell me how disrespectful I was and not honoring them. Heaven forbid i ever said "no". That was blasphemy that unleashed wrath and punishment.
Honor them with what you give to them, not what you have to take from them ;)
When my marc ex wife got exposed for having a three year affair she told me "you can't judge me because you're a sinner too."
Same.
Respond back to her, “Takes one to know one.” The difference is which sinners have repented and surrendered to Christ Jesus?
Also, Jesus tells believers to judge among believers and test the spirits. We absolutely are taught and commanded to deal with sin within the Church(Body of Believers). How else can one be cast out of the Church if they refuse to repent? This is a lie from Satan that silences many believers. We are not to condemn another but we most certainly should be aware of what spirit is operating in them. Some will be restored to the Lord or else, at least, they are no longer being allowed into fellowship to spread their evil. A little leaven spoils the loaf.
@@melissaculpepper7663
My husband always came with biblical advice to me to shut me up. Thanks to knowing Jesus and the scripture I had good arguments I could stand against his manipulations. But he never would have let me convince him from anything that would have lead in repentence. No way! Instead he ghosted me every time he ran out of arguments. While I waited for him to return for talking about our issues and prayed for guidance and wisdom, he came back saying nothing pretending nothing had happened. It is useless discussing. You can't reach out to their twisted mind. You can't encounter a sick attitude in a healthy way of discussion. Just God can convince and heal them. Everything else is throwing pearls to the pigs. Shake the dust of the feet and leave the narcissist up to God.
This is the crazy making they do!
Mark Drischoll is my favorite of all the big online preachers. Mark said that a narcasist uses scripture to convict you, but never themselves. I agree 100% with his statement. My deceased mother in law was an absolute narcky, and every time my wife and I would visit her mother, she always had a list of the peoples who had wronged her in the last week or so. She never looked inwards to herself, no personal analaysis at all.
Narcissist will judge you harshly for no reason but will say that you accuse them...
Every. Single. Time. 😢
There's no safe Haven living with narcissist parents... As I gotten older I learned this scripture answer not a fool accordingly to its folly unless you become likewise as unto them so I just told him why I turned my back on them and turn my back on them I had enough of their bull. I was always treated like the outcast anyhow it doesn't bother me cuz I know that I was the hated child anyhow... It's no skin off my back and no skin off my nose being forced to live with them by the state and me not knowing what type of people they were was mainly the state's fault for not screening these people before placing my sibling and I and their custody
@@MelissaWarriorNotes I told mine to kiss off when they tried to tell me that I had to obey them even though I was living in my own place. Adult are tired of hearing it. Adult children are tired of hearing it and dealing with it. Especially when it comes from a narcissist, that do not do what the father says anyway. Why are we Forced to listen to these creeps? They are hypocrites telling us that we are the problem when in fact they are the problem.
When a narcissist tries to manipulate scripture for their benefit against me, I prayed about it. I found Isaiah 41:11-12.
That is their fate unless they repent, accept responsibility for their actions, and submit to the Almighty God.
Loved it. Thank you❤
I got Commandment 9 thrown at me when I went to some people at church for advice.
Rebuke Leviathan and Jezebel
@@NikkiGRocks4Ever also 13 🥰😇🥰
@@ashleyhuxley3422 Psalm 37 too
"Scripture should be in love not a sledgehammer" 💯💯💯
TRUE!!!!!
@@NLC0413 very true!! But most adults use it as a sledgehammer!! Until the children take that sledgehammer out of their hands using it on them! 😡 People are getting tired of it! 😡
My go to response for the demonic narcissistic scripture manipulation for power and control is always: “Yes, I’m your child, but I’m no longer a child. I’m now an adult with my own thoughts and opinions and can express them just like any other adult.” This is my way to even the playing field and so far it’s worked every time with the narcissist from stopping 🛑 them to try and usurp my authority in my life ✋🏼!
I'm a minister of a Christian church and my narcissistic daughter says to me 'I should love her unconditionally'. She is almost 30! I say that only God can do that and although I have love and compassion for her struggles with mental health, it does not mean I am a doormat and come to her beck and call. Praying for her and believing God will intervene by his Holy Spirit.
Love but not enable
🙏🏾
Even God does not love unconditionally. There are conditions to every contract. It is contractual love, not unconditional love.
@@lyndacrossley9548 your daughter isn't the one showing red flags
@@MichelleCasandraMindofChrist that is not correct. I believe you are confusing love with eternal life with God. Consider the words of Jeffery Dahlmer’s dad; I do not approve of what he did, but he is my son and I love him. I firmly and Biblically believe this is how God loves us. We are His children, and even we don’t believe in Him, even if He knows we will perish He still “”loves” us, unconditionally. But that does not mean we automatically inherit eternal life - THAT is what is conditional, and He still loves us.
peace
I'm aware of a situation where the wife is the narcissist and the husband is the victim. And this was a military guy! I'm in prayer all the time for this family!!
Just met my estranged step daughter in law . She was abusive and some one stole my medication. She’s moving to the area. She wanted to camp in the driveway while she builds a house. Nooooo . Boundaries needed. Hod showed me she’s a theif , liar, and sadly she adopted a child to cure her empty nest syndrome. That child is ignored when she’s not showing her off.
@@rosalindr4975 so sad...
Prayers 🙏🏾
My son in law - my daughter is a narcissist and so was her father.
I think you're talking about me. I met my wife in the military she was military, too. Controlled me like an R/C car. I had a child's cell phone so she could monitor everything and would block my phone from calling her or anyone when she got upset.
"A fool in error is always fast to quote Scriptures".
Satan knows the word too
"Leave and cleave" was used repeatedly by my soon to be ex-wife to try to convince me that I was commanded to cut off all ties to my family and previous relationships. It was a pathetic attempt to isolate me.
When my daughter remarried I was told "you're not immediate family".... have not been invited to the house for ANYTHING and she no longer recognizes me as a mom, friend or family member. This affects my grandchildren as well. It's been going on since 2012. We were very close and enjoyed one another .... but it came to a complete halt 😮
Destroyed me for a while. I cried a lot and begged God for understanding. Fast forward to 2024.... less tears for me but heartache 💔 is real. I cannot allow it to dictate my life. I'm moving forward and gonna be about the Father's business until THAT DAY ☝️
I just pray for answers and want the painful episodes of abandonment to stop.
She's my only child (2 grandchildren...grown now but much affected in the negative. No relationship anymore 😢) I am learning to walk in a constant state of repentance and forgiveness.... in every matter. ☝️💔💖
NEVER in a million years would I have thought my family would be destroyed like this 😕 I am ALONE but not LONELY...I have Jesus Christ and HE FILLS MY EVERY NEED. ☝️💖
I just miss my daughter and grandchildren.
Any suggestions??
Texas Nana
Psalm 91
@@lyngruen8607 just wait on the Lord
“Scripture should be a mirror not a sledgehammer” excellent point 10:16 thank you for these 10 minute chats. Very grateful ❤ God bless you! 🙏
His past mistakes that needed to be left in the past since he didn't like talking about them can be as far back as 1 minute..."it is in the past, forget about it already!"
Right!!!
Trust is given, mistrust is earned!
Bingo
I think that is the bible my mother reads. She has said all of those twisted scriptures to me many times. Just two weeks ago she texts me saying God calls us to forgive... and forget...I have been struggling on how to honor her. I don't like her. she is evil and downright mean to me! she cuts off communication with me to punish me, I'm tired of it... I am 60 years old and still a sad hurt child... I am a Christian, I just need to focus on the Lord and stay in His word daily... Sometimes I just get stuck in a cloud of depression. Thank you, I certainly needed to hear this today... The twisted bible verses were spot on.
Be like the Bereians. Always double check in your own Bible what she says and seeks solace in Jesus not a human.
Cheryl read Psalm 50:16-21 that's the type of persons God HATES.
Psalms 27 I think... I had fainted unless I had believed...
Forgive... from a distance. Turn your face away from her to Jesus and the Father, who love you best!
There is something wrong with her generation. So many of my friends share the same experience. I know it feels sad that she's not a true mother, but as long a you keep trying or expecting her to be, she won't. It's not in her. God gives everyone free will. You have to accept what she's chosen to do with hers and move on. Don't give her your energy. People like that will literally suck the life from you.
What's helped me is calmly addressing my mom's hypocrisy directly in the moment as she's doing it so she can't escape. It's caused her to back up 10 paces. It let's her know I see exactly what she doing, but I leave her no attitude to try to guilt me about, etc.
You are worthy of love. Don't focus on where it's not. Focus on where it is. Peace to you.
I had this. She told me, “I have the Holy Spirit, and if you contradict me, you will go to hell.”
and I had to obey everything she said.
I hope you left her.
I hope you left her.
@ we don't communicate
Thank you for bringing up “Honour your Mother & Father”. I moved away from my parents with my husband and kids at 38 years of age. I was constantly told I’m not honouring and that I was selfish for moving away. I needed this 🩷
You got away!!!
Because I want to be control freaks and because they were miserable they expect Our lives to be miserable... I don't think so.
Forgive from a distance.
The accuracy is freaking me out. 😮
🙏🏼🙏🏼 know the Truth to detect the lies.
John 8:32. You will know the truth. The truth will make you free.
But being able to detect the lies is only 1/2 of the battle. The other 1/2 is understanding how to respond to these lies. In this, the most effective scripture is “Answer not a fool, according to his folly, lest you be like him yourself. Answer a fool, according to his folly lest he be wise in his own eyes.” Prov 26:4-5
It takes great discernment to be able to do this effectively, and to know when to apply the answering of the fool in this case, the narcissist, and when not to answer the narcissist in their continuous and never ending lies.
So true🙏🙏
In Mark 3: 35 Jesus says “ for whoever does the will of God is my brother, sister, and mother”. In Mathew 10:36 Jesus states “ a man’s enemies will be members of his own household”. Narcissists, who are people of the lie and creatures of chaos, do Satan’s bidding in order to keep others from their God given destiny by engineering perpetual turmoil. Focus on Jesus and not on the storm and pray like your life depends on it because it does. God absolutely will carry you through and bring you out from under their controlling influence and the narcissist will become ensnared in the traps they set out for others. Have faith, do not despair, believe and it will be done, for we worship a mighty and just God who detests evil. Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to give you hope and a future”.
Thank you ❤️
So good. And here's yet another scripture that needs to be heeded. Thou shalt not have any other gods before Me. Narcissist demand worship. They like their father the enemy, want/demand worship. They want to enslave people.. to bow down to them. For the Christian, this is Idol worship. Idolatry. They're aligned with their father like you say. Continuing to entertain the Narcissists will definitely keep one from completing their God appointed assignment on the earth which is the enemy's goal.
Amen.
@@deebee4622 yes in men use that obey your wife to beat their women over the head with. Narcissist men use that verse a lot! Woe unto them!! 😡
This channel has helped me so much on coping, God Bless you madam!
I filed for legal separation because I am trying to leave without harm. My abusive husband bashes me with the Bible verse, “God hates divorce.” He can’t stand that I refuse to backdown from my decision to leave him.
He also hates abuse. He hates the actions that lead to divorce.
Paul’s epistles list numerous acceptable reasons for divorce. If a believer is engaged in ongoing unrepentant sin of any kind then you may treat them as an unbeliever. If you married to an unbeliever you are allowed to divorce them and remarry. Therefore, if your spouse is engaged in ongoing unrepentant sin against you then you can treat them like an unbeliever. You can divorce them and, if you choose, remarry.
“God hates divorce.” Is not the only relevant scripture.
@@Dagnymarie1I had some in laws say this to me. And I said God hates liars abusers manipulators infidels...and all of a sudden, I heard so you see we have all sinned😂....
I said wow... no wonder their brother isnt moved by my pains. They just wanted me to go back to his house.
After the scripure thing wasnt working (thank God for Kris and counselling), it got to mix of culture and scripture also- honour elders we have begged you over and over. 😳
Then I am asked, whether I even bother about how he is feeding..I was shocked , my mental.gealth that almost got me to a dangerous point was less important... They need me to go care for his sexual appetite ( am I a prostitute 😢)
@@patienceoyeleye5736 Leslie Vernick is a great resources for Christians in destructive relationships. (Anyone could benefit from her info but she addresses what the Bible really says)
@@patienceoyeleye5736 I’m so sorry.
Kris, this is priceless. Your videos are such helpful, healthy tools for those of us dealing with narcissists. I wish I had someone like you in my 20s to guide me to set boundaries. As I got closer to 50 years old, I felt I should be healed by now and I wasn't. I hadn't even begun to process the decades of abuse. So, I began writing about it. I prayed the Lord would use this time to help me to process, grieve and eventually heal, finally, from this pain. We will see where the Lord leads. If it gets published and helps others feel less alone, praise God! If it doesn't and it was simply for my own healing process, praise God! It's so important to tell our stories and not suffer in silence. God bless you for being an educated voice of reason and for pointing to the Lord!
I can relate to these, but the one my parents used on me to keep me in a very bad place was “rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft “. Being rebellious was the last thing I wanted to do, so they were able to get me to do anything for them.
😮 wow😂 got that right - NTV: Narcissist Twisted Version!… yup. Well put.👍 thank you for this. validating, helps you know you’re not alone.
Amen!!! So true. No or very limited contact is the only way to go
People are using scripture, twisting it to suit their needs their wants. This is so good! In so many avenues of our life this happens, Narcs are everywhere! Once you see it, you can't unsee it. Literally surrounded. I'm just now starting to understand why Jesus will say depart from me I never knew you. I didn't understand how it could be possible. But never thought about it, that Satan tried to pull that with Jesus.
Love these videos.
I became a widow 4 years ago my husband and I were unable to have children. It has been shocking to me how many people have come out of the woodwork wanting a variety of things from me to serve their desires or needs because I have no husband or children. And using scripture to validate their request. The most frequent one is concerning money to sell all that I have- my home and my possessions and give it to the poor, of course they are the poor that they are talking about. When I asked what they thought I should do if I became penniless their reply has been they have a shed in the backyard without any electricity or running water that I could live in or some more generous- a back bedroom I could live in. Of course I laughed at such an idea . Out of sarcasm I felt like answering them that would be too good for me, don't they have a dog run I can live in but of course as a Christian I did not respond that way. Money hasn't been the only issue, some of them have been about ways in which they can fill my day being their personal assistant taking care of responsibilities for them. Again the scripture be a servant to all. I am very grateful to the Holy Spirit for giving me an answer to these people, and that is - I will ask the Lord if this is something I should do or not. And I do ask the Lord, most of the time I hear no this is a yoke they are putting on you not something I am asking of you. Some of the time I am to serve and I do it willing but with healthy boundaries.
There’s a lot of people that make believe that they are genuine and believe in God and around to help humanity when all they’re out is to help themselves only. It’s very sad.
No one expects to discover they were deceived into a marriage by a wolf disguised in sheep's clothing. To discover that is what has in fact occurred, is incredibly traumatising on so many levels. Unfortunately, there are some denominations that totally rely on these exact twists of scripture, in order to keep women and children in bondage to manipulative abusers, because it suits those in power within those very churches to keep it that way. THANK YOU for posting this video.
So true.
They also want to lead you into sin. My ex told me he wanted to be the kind of husband that if he came home and caught me in bed with another man, he'd still want to stay together. I was so shocked and disgusted.
That's a hallmark of the personality of an unclean spirit. Filthy. That's a part of how unclean spirits in the Narcissist moves. Always Always some aspect of sexual impurity however it manifest. Perversion of God's design for s#x / sexuality.
That's bc he wanted you to give him the permission back so he could do it!!
How terrible
I thought it was only my soon-to-be ex who said this. "If I come home and find you in bed with another man, I would close the door, and hope he satisfied you." What?!?!? He said it with a complete straight face and honest tone. Didn't not hear himself? What twisted thinking! He was trying to give me permission to cheat so he would feel better about it himself.
@@sukru6797 they are sick in the head!
Have heard 1 and 2 repeatedly. Yet they will never read the scriptures that pertain to their own bad behavior - like drinking, fighting, lewdness, etc. After several years, I think it is finally time to go "no contact." They will never change. Thanks Kris. Just started watching your videos a day ago. They are the best.
And then they twist the scriptures to their own destruction. They cherry pick
Also conveniently ignored is Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
Understanding Narcissism
A narcissist lives in a fantasy world where he is a king in his court of slaves. He is superior and in control of them. So, any nonsubmission, disobedience, inattention, opposition, criticism, competition, defeat, disrespect, or even trying to be an equal is not tolerated and he will react with “narcissistic rage”.
The Narcissist’s true self is broken and disgusting, and he sees this. This causes him intolerable shame and pain when he thinks of it or if others recognize it. This makes him chronically miserable, and envious of other “normal” people. This second false self of a king is a fake one he invented to mask the true one and stop the pain and shame. Its characteristics are the opposite of what he sees in his true self. It is omnipotent, great, all-knowing, highly successful, beautiful, unique, infallible, enviable, indispensable to others, in control, and charming. This second self is so fragile because it is fake. And he is willing to do anything even murder to hide the true self and show the other false one.
Narcissistic supply is the continuous supply he needs from people to prop up this fake image and numb his pain. He needs it to prove to himself and to others that this second false self is real and to hide the true one. Every situation for him is a struggle to get this supply.
Having a slave provides him with narcissistic supply. It is in his own interest that you become isolated, weak, afraid, dependent, inferior, broken, and a failure so that you conform to the role of a slave to the king. So, he studies you and then manipulates you to trap and destroy you to conform to that role. To do so he uses isolation, intimidation, gas lighting, Scapegoating, idealization (love bombing)/devaluation/discard cycles, criticism, projection, displacement, physical abuse, humiliation, lying, insults, judging, boundary violation, bragging, smearing, triangulation or giving you the silent treatment. In his eyes you are not a human with feelings, dignity and rights; you are just a source of supply. He lacks any empathy towards you.
Imagine a hot air balloon on which an image of a king is drawn with an ugly deformed monkey hiding inside the balloon. It needs continuous inflation, which your job in life is to provide, or what’s inside would be seen.
Wow, great explanation.
@@ThatBerkleySingerPoet ua-cam.com/video/byT380OpdkQ/v-deo.html
SO SPOT ON. I just lived through this for 6 years, which ended 2 days ago. Yah told me to leave, and I did. This time for GOOD. My Father in Heaven with guide. 🙏🏾
A legend in their own minds.
The one time he said he was as sorry.., it was soon over and back to his old self. Twisted manipulation. And it was so distorted. To serve him!
I had parents like narcissists. Both never cared but themselves and tried to make me feel bad for stuff thier bad behavior.
My family needed to hear this so badly. As mom ages her behavior has really become intense and we need prayers for sure.
This was my entire life with my Mom. So hard to deal with and undo. I’m still on my healing journey with this and having a hard time knowing what is truth.
God's word is truth, but read it for yourself. Ask the spirit to teach you and be patient with yourself if you aren't sure you understand it well.
It's okay to be still and know that God is God. Actually it's commanded.
NTV😅love it. The weaponize everything-especially God and His Word. Forgiveness doesn't mean you're going forward with them-THEY believe you'll just keep putting up with them-forever
The one last night was
"Do not Judge"
The other day is was "forgive".
My dad has a few cherry picked bible verses that he clings to in order to continue his abusive behavior because he thinks that Jesus paid for his sins and therefore he doesn’t need to change. He has no interest in hearing ALL of the other scriptures that say we must be born again, put off the old man, put off all anger, malice, etc. etc. and when I bring it up he gets infuriated and goes into a fit of rage, mocking me and saying that I’m so self righteous.
But they never quote and you fathers provoke not your children to wrath lest they become discouraged...
Endured this for 30 years. Never knew it was a mental condition. Always thought something was wrong with me. Now waking up to this new information and trying to heal my wounded soul. 🙏🏻
This is the first time I understand what is going on with a Narcissists in my life! Thank you for this amazing video!! I will keep studying this content and viewing all videos available!!
Sometime they say you have “the spirit of offense”.
Heard that. “What are you always so offended and unforgiving”…. Abuse, manipulation and affairs as well as stealing form me they wonder why I’m offended?! I do forgive but I’m not fool enough to let them back blindly
How repulsive behaviours❗️Normal people would not do things like these❗️
We're supposed to forgive them just so they can feel better about themselves and then they can do it all over again and then lay all the blame on us and pount out and twist every single thing from our past since childhood.
This 100000% grace grace grace. Turn the other cheek a million times and let them do it again and again and again.
When you get sick and tired of being sick and tired. It's time to walk far away and stay away
You only have to honor them if they are honorable people.
Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let him go i did all i could to get him back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
I'm sorry about what you're going through. Praying for peace & reconciliation. I sincerely hope for the best for each of you, regardless of what God's plan is for each of you. God Bless. Be the light that washes away the darkness. 💕🙏🏼😇
The one thrown at me by a covert narcissist is, Love covers a multitude of sins”. Complete twist using it as a hush-hush
I grew up in church, and i rarely saw a wife submit to their husband. They all treated their husband like they are too stupid to know they are being disrespected.
Respect is needed.
To submit is to give.
Wives give respect to their husbands.
Men of honor respect women.
Husband love your wife.
Thank you for this sobering video. I’ve become a co dependent nightmare, instead of recognizing my heritage.
My narcisist brother just to quote the comandment of honor your parents to make me give my time and money to my mom when i didnt have any, making me feel bad about not helping out, he just to always talk about family unity and he was the first one to throw you under the bus when things didnt go well in the family
Thank you so much for #4. I just found you this past week and heard this one today. I Just turned 46 and with a lifetime of disabilities was treated exactly as described. 24 brought me a great awakening but has left me so worried about my exit solely wrapped up on that area of scripture. You don't know how much this message has cleared my mind and spirit. I'm so grateful to you for this. God Bless You
Breaking chains in Michigan
EXCELLENT content Kris!! Thank you so much. They truly have an alternate reality. They are empty vessels.
Alternate Reality!
Thanks for watching !
Thank you for providing insight into narcissism through a Biblical lens.
Oh my goodness! He used number 3 every day! Claiming that it was written in that specific order so that the man cannot honour the woman until she submits to him. She must submit first before he will show her respect or honour! This in conjunction with women being the weaker/lesser vessel, the clone, that through which sin entered the world. That being said, I did submit and he still didn't respect me. So glad to be out of that! Thank you so much for this video, I wasn't crazy!
Bless you sister. Women aren't clones, we literally were taken out of Adam's body-"So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:27). Also, "So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said,
“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”
(Genesis 2:21-23).
Another thing, sin entered the world through one MAN, Adam, not a woman. Eve was deceived but Adam commited high Treason against The Lord-"Because of this, just as sin entered into the world through one man, and death through sin, so also death passed to all men, because all sinned." ( Roman's 5:12).
Remember, we are all supposed to be ONE in Christ Jesus, where there are no males that are better than women." There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus." (Galatians 3:28). Some men want to use your gender against you (which is an offense to the God who made you) and
submit to them the way they perceive what submit means from their spirit of control lense. Our first priority is to submit to God before man, even ones own husband. 🙏
Amen!!!!! Just like saying Jesus was here to love and bring peace and acceptance. He came as a sword.
My covert narc wife CONSTANTLY threw the "Love me like Christ loves the church" at me no matter what I did.
Yep they beat you over the head with the Bible but never admit to any of their wrongdoings.. that goes on all the time in every family and I'm just getting sick of it.. I was talking to one this evening complaining about his divorce oh I wonder why they got a divorce.hmm hmm because his wife got tired of him Bible thumping over her head!!
FANTASTIC Insight and assessment of scripture violations, Kris Reece. You’ve nailed my parents. Thank you.
Dito. You nailed my husband.
Amen. Narcissists misuse scripture constantly. Don't fall for it. Yesterday i finally decided to make a video addressing Narcissists on my channel. I usually discuss issues regarding exposing darkness in this world (Ephesians 5:11), but I've recently felt the Lord urging me to expose narcissism and help others. I'm going through it. I understand and want to help others. I'm so glad i came across this channel. Great job
This really good. Thanks, Kris for allowing God to continue to use you. Many blessings and God’s protection to you
🙏🏻
Lol. I love this. I do know the Narcissist Twisted Version! and for Almost everyday of our almost 42 years together. My self-righteous christian husband (who by-the-way says preachers are wrong to devalue the older brother of the Prodigal son, because the older brother had a right to be angry - because the older brother has done everything right) would choose a Bible verse for our daily devotions and point his finger at my nose telling me how I am not up-to-standard on this and better improve. He would do this in front of our children. It took maybe 30 years before I put a stop to this in our daily Bible devotions. Yes, I know, I am a slow learner. But then I came from a narcissistic physically, verbally and emotionally abusive childhood home to just a verbally and emotionally abusive home. I thought I did better. My concern is how it has affected my three children.
my ex used to say "for the marriage to work, one should always put the other person first", meaning, the other person was always him
"God will provide". Translation: "you will provide everything I want, when I want it, and I don't have to do any work at all."
#3 is a big one for my narc husband. He is constantly throwing that one at me basically telling me that no matter what I am to submit to him and let him lead even though that has lead to all our money and savings being spent and our family nearly being homeless. But it’s all my fault because I am a worthless wife who won’t submit
@@KourtneyMEmmert You would be better served not to repeat his negative words, out loud or in your head. Instead, ask Jesus to heal your memories of those evil comments and replace them with Godly things. And you please pray for your husband, especially when he says things you know are untrue about you. Learn the Hail Mary if you don't already know it. She is our spiritual mother, given to us all as Jesus was dying on the cross for all our salvation. Ask her to give him the Grace to change his ways and you to have the continuing Graces of strength and patience while she works to soften his heart. Mary is a miracle worker ... my formerly verbally abusive alcoholic husband of over 30 years is making astounding changes! I had set aside my Cradle Catholic roots to be with him and endured decades of this type of abuses (and learned to dish out some pretty awful stuff myself in misguided self defense!) But I finally was given the Grace to stand up for myself and put God first. And started praying for his conversion ... a 54 Day Novena. Along about day 52, he suddenly announced that he thought we should have a statue of Mary beside the tiny pond in the middle of our circle driveway!! You have to understand how crazy that statement was ... we're old/junk car collectors in a rural area with no real lawn and certainly no statues. We have dogs and poultry and cars! But you better believe I wasted no time helping him find a statue and there she stands, a visual reminder of her spiritually watching over his progress!!! He had given up alcohol over a year before and truly is becoming a better person daily. He also was willing to Convalidate our civil marriage in the eyes of the Catholic Church. And a few months later, thanks to Father Staples (yes, Tim Staples brother) meeting with him privately for weekly for months to Catachise him, my husband came into the Catholic Church in May of 2023! The Lord has done great things for us and Holy is His name!
Hail Mary, full of Grace
The Lord is with thee
Blessed art thou amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus
Holy Mary, mother of God
Pray for us now and at the hour of our death
Amen
And thanks, blessed Mother, for taking my husband by the hand and leading him to your Son!!!
But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
- 1 Timothy 5:8
My boss told me she wants to bring God’s value to workplace. She is at church every week, goes to major Christian festivals, but then continues to be the narcissist she always has been. It did make me wonder why God allows it, and for a little while my faith was paper thin. I’m just glad I’m back now and listening to this. Thank you.
Every time my parent used the honor your parents I'd use the don't nag your kids one and they never accepted it due to that meant they'd have to back off on their inappropriate demands.
I am a firm believer in playing by the rules of your opponents while never accepting their premises. You did the right thing here, I think- you rejected their premise that you must always "honor" them by doing everything they want you to do, while showing them a passage that effectively did the same thing to them.
I'm not saying you yourself was trying to distort or twist the Bible for your own sake. I'm saying that it is fair game to do so in order to show their folly. Remember Proverbs 26:4-5.
I hope all is well with you and yours.
You're a wise woman. The "Judge Not Lest Ye be Judged" is a weapon wielded by the fool. To make a narcissist self immolate simply quote 1 Corinthians 2: 15
1st Corinthians 5 is seriously heavy duty.
Had one who threatened to kill my sisters family confront me with "Jesus says you can't stop me!" I responded "I will be glad to send you on your way to plead your case!"
Whenever I tried to stand up for myself, I was given Proverbs 12:1
Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.
Miss Reece , those of us who wear the armour of God are compelled to heal and protect the weak who suffer the evils this life is filled with. You are doing wonders by reaching people through technology. Bless you and may your reach encompas the world.
Sad but true.
YOU ARE A KNOWLEDGEABLE LADY,
My ex told me “I’m the man and I’ll tell you what is a sin and what’s not a sin”.
You only need to follow those who are obedient to God.
Kris, Thank you for your work. It's a tough one. If you;ve had to live through this, I'm sorry for that. I hope you've healed through it. Blessings !
What about "touch not my anointed one"? That one is commonly used by narcissists.
Yah, disgraced ministry leader Bill Gothard said that to my face when I questioned his ministry morality. I'll never forget that interaction, even 25 years later.
This is sooo good man. I was ALWAYS manipulated with scripture ❤️
I love this video, thanks for creating it. Thank you.
Thanks for watching :)
8:26 My dad loved to use this twisted scripture against me. Even as a married woman.
Every time you say "twisted scripture" in this video it reminds me of the band Twisted Sister....and I can't help but imagine my own twisted sister getting together with other twisted sisters and forming a band called "Twisted Scripture" lol :)))....Forgive me...I didn't get enough sleep last night and I get a bit slap happy when sleep deprived.
This is so accurate,yet sp scary.My ex-husband said the same things 😮 I had no idea so many people are dealing with this type of abuse....I hope we all heal,it's very hard.😢😢
I got so sucked into my girlfriend's world that she was all I could think about. It got so bad I couldn't even pray period when I could finally see who she really is , I was quickly found in violation . She quickly attacked every aspect of my life including my religion
I am guilty of using scripture as a weapon out of anger and frustration
my mother !!! ..She has my son now 😢
The verses pertaining to forgiveness in the Bible have a caveat everyone seems to miss: the offender MUST REPENT first!!!!! IF the offender does not repent of their offense against you, then you owe them NO forgiveness. Universal blanket forgiveness is not even offered by God. Scripture is also clear that we are to judge one another according to the commandments; Lawless churches do not honor this.
Hi Kris I want to say that since I subscribed to your channel am getting empowered alot in regards to narcissism and good thing is that you are a Christian and using biblical principles in explaining and teaching about it. Kindly do an episode about dealing with narcissistic parents as a Christian how should we deal with a narcissistic mom or dad and siblings too. God bless you
Why do victims of narcissistic abuse defend and look like narcissists too?
That's the really scary part.!