How to deal with difficult people - 4 Magic Phrases to respond to almost any insult

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  • Опубліковано 23 вер 2020
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    Questions that will be answered within this video:
    • How do we tend to respond when face a difficult person or bully?
    • What are some reasons people say or do hurtful things?
    • What are some easy and effective ways to respond to negative people in almost ANY situations?
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 595

  • @harshapincha7485
    @harshapincha7485 9 місяців тому +30

    when someone slips in a negative remark, I often pretend to not have heard them and ask them to repeat it. Either they shy away from the situation or attract judgement to their own negative remarks! Thank you for the impressive handling technique in this video!

    • @josephhale9198
      @josephhale9198 6 місяців тому +1

      I used to react. Now I ignore or tease them. 😂

    • @blusquirrel
      @blusquirrel Місяць тому +1

      🤔 What if they DO repeat it?

  • @ranu6982
    @ranu6982 3 роки тому +26

    Without being rude we can easily get rid of such people filled with so much negativity....

    • @ranu6982
      @ranu6982 3 роки тому +3

      Your directions will definitely work mam... Thanks

    • @ranu6982
      @ranu6982 3 роки тому +3

      @@fredschell8051 pls. Summarize it in just one or two sentences...

    • @mirianalogara2909
      @mirianalogara2909 4 місяці тому +2

      Not everyone has the privilege to let go of those people. Sometimes we are stuck with them and there's no other option than dealing with them.

  • @taimurchoudhry.
    @taimurchoudhry. 3 роки тому +11

    I can't stop smiling because you made a complex problem so simple. Reminds me of Peter Drucker.

  • @dr.elmerhartman8390
    @dr.elmerhartman8390 3 роки тому +61

    Me: So you are married.
    Her: That's interesting, what made you ask that?

  • @dinkuaiims
    @dinkuaiims 2 роки тому +10

    I really love this idea. I have been struggling for all my life with passive aggressive people who say something short but stingy, in a subtle way, but I don’t know should I call them out or just ignore as a “no biggie”. But that thought stays with me… why did she say that?… Why was I not able to defend myself…It is always hurtful in retrospect. I now know how to acknowledge and respond with assertiveness.

  • @riteshpuri5112
    @riteshpuri5112 3 роки тому +71

    I really loved it when you said that people generally expect us to give a negative response. I have noticed that a lot but instead we should smile or be calm and ask “oh really, that’s interesting tell me more”😀🙏🏻

    • @jayani6584
      @jayani6584 2 роки тому +5

      Exactly. Some people triger you purposely expecting negative response.

    • @spiritualfairy999
      @spiritualfairy999 Рік тому +1

      Correct

  • @sashw87
    @sashw87 3 роки тому +42

    Thank you so much for this! I am dealing with an extremely negative boss, and as of late I have been retaliating to her bullying. I am afraid that my behaviour might be considered rude/insubordination. I will definitely be using your method.

    • @ShadeZahrai
      @ShadeZahrai  3 роки тому +18

      I’m so sorry to hear that you have a challenging boss - it can be so difficult to navigate situations like this. Definitely try this approach - I hope it might help!

  • @himashreehazarika5112
    @himashreehazarika5112 3 роки тому +9

    I often face this issue,it triggers my emotions, while at that moment I get confused what to say them back.
    Thanks a lot to share this, I'll surely apply this next time.

  • @rachriri
    @rachriri 3 роки тому +11

    Ive always resorted to youtubers to find answers for such situations but its the first time I actually feel you taught me something and not vaguely said “take a breath in and out and you should be good” without any explanation - looking forward to more videos - wish you can do one about putting boundaries with people close to you

    • @ShadeZahrai
      @ShadeZahrai  3 роки тому +4

      Wow, this is such a beautiful comment! Thank you 🙏 I’m so happy you found value in this video - it’s a super simple hack I love to share. It’s served me very well, and I hope it does you too Rach!

  • @gabbywinters708
    @gabbywinters708 3 роки тому +8

    I never used to respond well to criticism, I moved on to just complete silence, and ignoring it. More recently, and, mostly, I clapped back with sarcasm, even with the statement *Mmm*... "Sounds very interesting..."
    I will most certainly use these statements moving forward - in a positive way of engagement.
    Thank you 🙏♥️

  • @John-wd5bu
    @John-wd5bu Рік тому +15

    Thank you, Shade Zahrai. This truly makes dealing with negative people and hard situations a breeze. Just having those questions in my mind is giving me peace. Asking is better than assuming or judging :)

  • @mustgame2233
    @mustgame2233 3 роки тому +47

    You're a life saver

  • @Chronade
    @Chronade 3 роки тому +20

    This is a big topic, you're changing lives! Thank you for these magic phrases, they'll come in handy! Your videos are so exciting. When dealing with difficult people, I exercise empathic listening, before my Mental Health was in check, I was quick to get angry, quick to get bitter, but now i fight fire with water, if it is possible on my part, I make and peace with everyone; I say things such as, "I see. I see." Thanks for making this video! Have a great weekend! :)

  • @EzekJohnson
    @EzekJohnson 3 роки тому +21

    Wow. Shade. You’re a great coach. I’ve heard the “that’s interesting...” communication technique taught a number of times but you added another level of genius and to it that has helped me understand it more. God bless you

  • @PiyushPragyan
    @PiyushPragyan 3 роки тому +24

    Thanks Shade for making my day.💓
    The level of positivity that I can gain from your videos is insane.Perfect way to start my day.

  • @kavitakanwar2161
    @kavitakanwar2161 3 роки тому +1

    These are most generous way to respond politely in a humble way to limit the negativity to spread and affect us and anyone.Really good. Thank u so much.

  • @raghavendraprabhu8975
    @raghavendraprabhu8975 8 місяців тому +1

    The way you said it is absolutely blissfull. Just enough to Know in 1 video what kind of Aura you have. Will follow your steps to optimize myself towards the finest things in life.

  • @vijayam1
    @vijayam1 Рік тому +2

    Let me be honest, the way you say it softly and a gleam your eye just calms me over and learn a new tip in a positive way! Thank you!

  • @QAAAA1212
    @QAAAA1212 3 роки тому +9

    Very well structured and informative. ”Always respond with a question” - ☺️

  • @pratikchakraborty6354
    @pratikchakraborty6354 3 роки тому +16

    I swear this is one video I absolutely needed. Thank you so much Shade.

  • @deraxsi
    @deraxsi 3 роки тому +3

    Sometimes I’m staring at them, without saying anything, expect from them to thinking more. But today I learned another cool strategy. Many thanks Shade🙏

  • @abdulhameedmjalil299
    @abdulhameedmjalil299 3 роки тому +2

    Yes, it's an amazing way of responding to negative people or situations.

  • @zubairso
    @zubairso 3 роки тому +223

    Will it work in a scenario where the manager goes, "You're fired!" Me: "That's interesting, what made you say that?" lol. Thanks for the amazing tips though.

    • @Ap-zq7lb
      @Ap-zq7lb 2 роки тому +12

      thats interesting, what made you say that?

    • @MichaelrAngora
      @MichaelrAngora 2 роки тому +28

      The boss will then reassess his reasons for firing you and explain them in more detail (if he hasn't done it already).
      You now have an opportunity assess if you can make adjustments to yourself and possibly offer your boss to reconsider his decision. If you can't adjust, this is where you politely accept the decision and leave in a dignified way.
      If all that doesn't work, just say "I'll see you outside when your shift ends".
      That 2nd phrase is very effective.

    • @abdelhakim8269
      @abdelhakim8269 2 роки тому +7

      @@MichaelrAngora i agree with you Mikey about second phrase 😀

    • @karandonga9326
      @karandonga9326 2 роки тому +6

      @@MichaelrAngora what if the boss asks "that's interesting, what made you say that?" 🤔

    • @IAMBlessed811
      @IAMBlessed811 2 роки тому +1

      @@MichaelrAngora wow 🤩

  • @learnwithaamir1001
    @learnwithaamir1001 Рік тому +1

    I don't think it will work with my foster parents, who are extremely rude, make you work hard for house chores, and look down upon you for everything in life (as if you were mistakenly born), their ego is extremely high for them to be ever wrong on anything, and they are highly educated (Ph.D). I went through this pain for over 20 years and as a child, I don't know how I survived it. Only remembering and trusting in the creator helped me through this difficult time period in my life. These people can't go to jail in our society but the ONE who created all beings is ever watchful for our actions. May the creator of heaven and earth watch over all who are patient with difficult people around them. Amīn.

  • @guylookingthesky7934
    @guylookingthesky7934 3 роки тому +1

    Finally there is someone to help us dealing with toxic people in a practical way

  • @shastrisingh
    @shastrisingh 3 роки тому +5

    Thank you Shadé Zahrai ! Awesome magic phrases, I will use them wisely.

  • @parthahazarika4299
    @parthahazarika4299 Рік тому +7

    That's interesting Shade.I'm grateful to you for this awareness video in terms of bringing a bold approach to face any challenging situations in day to day life.I definitely have a takeaway message which can be practiced daily

  • @elton340
    @elton340 2 роки тому +2

    Amazing as always! Thanks for sharing Shadé!

  • @harnoorsingh1287
    @harnoorsingh1287 3 роки тому +7

    Its a very unique analysis. This thing actually causes a lot of distress to the people.and they don't even realise it..
    You have shown the animal instincts present within us..and it is a decent way to encounter it..
    Very good.keep it up..
    God bless you

    • @ShadeZahrai
      @ShadeZahrai  3 роки тому +6

      Yes, not knowing how to deal with insults and negative communication really does cause a lot of suffering. And you're absolutely right we all have an animal and a spiritual nature. Such practical tips can really help us conquer our animal nature and to respond with wisdom and dignity. God bless too 🙏🏽😊

  • @krystalw5602
    @krystalw5602 3 роки тому

    This is my FIRST comment EVER on UA-cam. I'm more than willing to share your channel on ALL of my social media sites, with ALL of my family members and friends, but then, on the other hand, I don't want to share at all just because you are such a treasure that I want to keep it to myself! Why didn't I come across you earlier?? Thank you for sharing so much insightful info with us; please keep going!

  • @S.F.G1
    @S.F.G1 3 роки тому +3

    I desperately needed someone to suggest me to handle this situation.
    Thank you so much

  • @proactivevee
    @proactivevee 10 місяців тому +1

    Thank you very much for posting this video. You have no idea how helpful these phrases you just shared. Stay incredible in everything that you do! 😍

  • @venkataramareddytadi6964
    @venkataramareddytadi6964 2 роки тому +1

    thank you so much shade, you are my life saver. Keep up the good work.

  • @ashokkonatham8857
    @ashokkonatham8857 3 роки тому +1

    wow, so nice to address the bullying guys

  • @ragazzosemplice67
    @ragazzosemplice67 Рік тому +1

    Thank you so much Shade. This is going to really help. Keep up the good work.

  • @jayasjain6760
    @jayasjain6760 Рік тому

    Simply WOW...a beautiful addition to my newly found understanding of 'respond, not react'....thank you!

  • @AbhishekKumar-vp7ey
    @AbhishekKumar-vp7ey 3 роки тому +14

    Thank You Shade. Needed this.
    I am a shy, introvert kind of person and used to either react aggressively or let the other person have the Win.
    This is very helpful.

  • @km2897
    @km2897 2 роки тому

    She is so well spoken jazakAllah

  • @abuturab6611
    @abuturab6611 3 роки тому +1

    Beautiful and highly useful video! Thank you, Shade!

  • @Travelogues_Arunava
    @Travelogues_Arunava 3 роки тому +2

    I take a deep breath, put my head down & smile. Believe me it helps in releasing the pent up emotions.

  • @journeywithashley1800
    @journeywithashley1800 3 роки тому +7

    Next time when my sister behaves rudely , I will say "thats interesting"👍

  • @sourabhsuri8812
    @sourabhsuri8812 Рік тому +25

    Totally love this woman and how she is changing the lives for Many.. She is picking up the Best Practices from her experiences/ observations and whatever is being taught to us; by our elders too.. But we always need a kick-in-the-back.. to learn and implement the lessons. Thank you @Shade..

  • @priyaramdoo4762
    @priyaramdoo4762 Рік тому

    Amazingly precise in handling and solve most challenging situations or conversations that can cause lingering emotional issues

  • @gagantechtechnical6737
    @gagantechtechnical6737 3 роки тому +4

    After the video I was like" that's interesting plz post more videos" 😂❤️

  • @redlumf
    @redlumf 3 роки тому

    I can’t thank you enough for sharing this. Love this video! 😃

  • @arghadeepsaha8598
    @arghadeepsaha8598 3 роки тому +4

    In the story 'The Adventure of Three Gables', Steve Dixie comes in the room like a mad bull and threatens Sherlock Holmes. Holmes simply says: "Keep on talking, it's fine". Isn't it amazing that these practices existed ages ago but no one cared to learn or use them. Shadé Zahrai you are the Wonder Woman mankind has been waiting for ❤️. By the way more on communication/ relationship please 🙏🏻

  • @marygrace5054
    @marygrace5054 3 роки тому

    Fantastic shadé . This is truly helpful and brilliant tips . Thank you so much 🤗💖💖💖

  • @tsehayemolla4890
    @tsehayemolla4890 3 роки тому

    Happy You created UA-cam & appreciate for your positive, beautiful Coaching 🙏🙏

  • @DmitriyFrumkis
    @DmitriyFrumkis Рік тому

    Perfect. Right what i need and when I need. Thank you!

  • @salehabudakka8495
    @salehabudakka8495 2 роки тому +1

    That’s interesting indeed, thanks a lot For all the golden tips and videos ❤️❤️

  • @pwsmorrobay6753
    @pwsmorrobay6753 2 роки тому

    Thanks again for lightning me up ! ✨💖🙏🏻

  • @victoriawheeler5445
    @victoriawheeler5445 9 місяців тому

    I really like your videos😊 . My family members are a bigger triggers than my co-workers. Regardless, dealing with their negativity causes me a lot of stress, aggravation and general unhappiness . Thank goodness there are people like you who share their skills with the world for free😊

  • @triciajensen9679
    @triciajensen9679 Рік тому

    Love this! So easy, and will be very useful to me, thank you!!

  • @orchestrain88keys
    @orchestrain88keys 3 роки тому

    Thanks Shadé.... Totally applicable for me.

  • @ItissoIrene
    @ItissoIrene 2 роки тому

    Love your radiant positivity🕊

  • @CM-du5qh
    @CM-du5qh 2 роки тому +1

    I like this...and my prefrontal cortex is advising me that this information is easily more digestible coming from such an attractive person!

  • @AsafEiron
    @AsafEiron 3 роки тому

    That is a great advice, thank you!

  • @gauravsinghbedi6536
    @gauravsinghbedi6536 Рік тому

    THANK YOU SHADE ZAHRAI...YOU ARE WONDERFUL MOTIVATOR...WISH YOU LOTS OF SUCCESS AND HAPPINESS...THANK YOU...GOD BLESS YOU SHADE

  • @joeyballer
    @joeyballer 3 роки тому

    That is interesting. Why didn't I think about this?
    Thx you Shade for such a useful YET simple to do advice!

  • @rakeshhotker4762
    @rakeshhotker4762 3 роки тому

    Boy! she's going to hit a million now!

  • @amishasamani6663
    @amishasamani6663 2 роки тому

    Yes.. Will try

  • @thivyavenugopal3307
    @thivyavenugopal3307 2 роки тому

    U r a goddess. U help me to ease with myself, when it's most uncomfortable and annoying.

  • @keerthi794
    @keerthi794 3 роки тому +1

    That's interesting, thank you for sharing it with us.

  • @dipgupta3725
    @dipgupta3725 Рік тому

    So very useful....thank you shade
    ....you are a treasure....

  • @sarahmurphy-nf4yl
    @sarahmurphy-nf4yl Рік тому

    You're a gem. Super. Loved that video. Love all your videos. Thank you.

  • @garygameon
    @garygameon 3 роки тому +4

    Love this! Meditation has helped me be centered for stressful situations and it's step one here with breathing but having phrases in my arsenal as a next step sure helps. Thank you.

    • @profbfc
      @profbfc Рік тому +1

      Imo phrases and action points for various situations is more important that meditation. Meditation is either a long term solution to be resiliant to stress or a short term mechanism to reduce symptoms of stress . Addressing the issue head on is far more effective.

  • @biancamagalhaes833
    @biancamagalhaes833 11 місяців тому

    At times when overcome tough situations we are not prepared emotionaly to respond in a dignified way, but definetely, I feel a lot gratitude for this tips :)

  • @abubakerkhalid8758
    @abubakerkhalid8758 8 місяців тому

    What a marvelous tips to defuse antagonism, perfect and more practical approaches. I bubble at workplace quite often , now will apply these techniques to cope with my problem while responding to an antagonizer , thanks for sharing your thoughts and knowledge. I will take it as an “ Advice”

  • @naturenurture84
    @naturenurture84 3 роки тому +15

    5:54 Thats interesting.. why would you do that?
    He must be luckiest guy in the world.

  • @zingsokasomwoshi7920
    @zingsokasomwoshi7920 2 роки тому

    Thanks for sharing.....this sounds simply interesting, gonna try

  • @hanikatlan7826
    @hanikatlan7826 Рік тому

    That is interesting and helpful Shadè, amazing how the brain michanizm and the amygdala kicks in as part of the fight or flight warning system, I think those words need to be thoroughly practiced to be used in real scenario, Thanks fr sharing that ❤

  • @hossamyasser8651
    @hossamyasser8651 Рік тому

    Thanks Ms. Shadé.

  • @michaelangelo257
    @michaelangelo257 Рік тому

    Hello. I really like the simplicity of your style of communicating the information. It gives me confidence and makes me realize the power I have within to make necessary changes to improve my surroundings. Great job. And I just subscribed.

  • @ray_of_hope4219
    @ray_of_hope4219 3 роки тому +8

    That's interesting, I would definitely use these 4 magic phrases in my life

  • @ap4554
    @ap4554 Рік тому

    Great points.

  • @genabrown8740
    @genabrown8740 3 роки тому +1

    Great tips!!!! Thank you :)

  • @debbiemurray1496
    @debbiemurray1496 Місяць тому

    Thank you, I will clearly understand how and why I'm responding positively. I really appreciate you 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

  • @besai2944
    @besai2944 2 роки тому

    Thank you for sharing this wonderful wisdom very helpful

  • @audreymeyer5616
    @audreymeyer5616 3 місяці тому

    Thanks! I will try that

  • @gabrielgkabelen4780
    @gabrielgkabelen4780 3 роки тому

    Thanks so much dear.

  • @krishnaprasadt8728
    @krishnaprasadt8728 3 роки тому

    Simply AWESOME!

  • @neerajshrivastava5867
    @neerajshrivastava5867 Рік тому

    Amazing 🤩
    Thanks again I appreciate your help. I used these magic phrases. It’s really works.

  • @browseblockchain7076
    @browseblockchain7076 4 місяці тому

    Interesting the way you explained, thank you.

  • @kevinharris9371
    @kevinharris9371 3 роки тому

    Amazing tips Shadé! You're great! ♥️😍👌👍👍

  • @motupatl
    @motupatl 3 роки тому

    ماشإاللہ i will apply that انشإاللہ

  • @horse3357
    @horse3357 Рік тому

    Thanks
    Incredible!!

  • @sachin_getsgoin
    @sachin_getsgoin 3 роки тому +2

    That's interesting :)
    I usually use flattery and then try to extract details so that the confronting person feels valued and assesses himself/herself properly.
    Example : I love to hear when your ideas, can we listen to how you arrived at this?
    Thanks for sharing the video. It gives a plan to approach such situations!

  • @firstlot4825
    @firstlot4825 2 роки тому

    It was a great video. Really much needed help. 👏🏼💯

  • @thepoliticalgita6512
    @thepoliticalgita6512 3 роки тому

    Was very good. Thank you!

  • @faisalhussain3860
    @faisalhussain3860 Рік тому

    Thank you for this tip ..

  • @imranam1602
    @imranam1602 3 роки тому

    Thank you Shade !

  • @josephhale9198
    @josephhale9198 6 місяців тому +1

    Never been a fan of Rollercoasters period. This is some of the best advice i ever received

  • @vineetmankar
    @vineetmankar 2 роки тому

    Just.. THANK YOU SO MUCH

  • @balraambalraam905
    @balraambalraam905 Рік тому

    Thank you so much for this💗❤️

  • @Eibo63
    @Eibo63 8 місяців тому +1

    It's nice to have some tools when it comes to communicating with negative people but I really can't recall a single situation where asking any of those questions could've helped. I believe that such situations require a lot of social skills and experience. I think the real useful take away here is the concept or main objective, which is simply trying to "find a way to shift the spotlight on them". Thanks for the video.

  • @JuCarlos-ex8ip
    @JuCarlos-ex8ip 2 роки тому

    Thanks for sharing the video,, your videos helped me out so much

  • @RichardGobel
    @RichardGobel Рік тому

    Thank you Shade

  • @AjinkyaMahajan
    @AjinkyaMahajan 3 роки тому +2

    It Was the best reaction I have learned in the entire week

  • @JuCarlos-ex8ip
    @JuCarlos-ex8ip 2 роки тому

    Thank you great video

  • @saiakshipandey9658
    @saiakshipandey9658 Рік тому

    Thank you so much. 🥰