When you see the woman at those events speak up and hear his answers, how many do you honestly believe are actually listening and raking it to heart? Do you think women even wanna hear what he has to say, or is just cardi bs, red, Kardashians stallions etc that drive the social norms? I want a womens perspective. Also side note what do u think of women who have platforms, podcast etc and are shaming him the men that think like this and say go get ur bag?
@omargreene3048 OMG!! Hello sir What a gorgeous man u are, yeah the man was speaking facts, protecting someone you like or love from yourself is hardly understood, I've seen too many couples go below the belt because they were hurt, talking bout they love each other , 😅 where is the love in how u spoke to each other. I hate to see it, I be getting so sad.
Exactly; that’s why I firmly believe we as a whole should only search for love when we are mentality ready, when he spoke about taking pieces away and expecting him to be empathetic when she needs is a key that shows that most individuals that are in relationships are not open minded or not ready to accept their partner for who they are, this happens on both sides regardless of gender. Why it is imperative to improve yourself day by day, not only for the benefit of others but for yourself as well.
What has you being a woman got to do with this message? What was the message that you understood? Because from what I understood, he was telling women to be better. To be able to allow their man to be soft with them. Let's be honest here, it is because women don't allow their men to be soft with them, which is what he is talking about. So please help me understand what has this message got to do with you as a woman? What is the correlation and how is it connected? Women dont understand that when a man comes home to their woman and becomes soft, it is because he is letting his guard down. Because you are his woman, not a woman. Because you are his woman, that is why he is able to let his guard down. But women have constantly shit on men who open up to them, women will use it as ammunition in arguments and fights. Are you going to deny that? Do you know why men don't open up? It is because women have shown us time and time again that we shouldnt. This is very important to understand. "As a woman i approve this message." No, as a man i approve this message. Remember, you brought gender into this.
@Love-39 really? That is your argument? That just because the question was asked by a woman, so you just assume that "as a woman" Is said. What's the correlation? Please explain. What is it that women approve of when you are the ones being discussed about, when women are the ones called to be accountable for their words and actions, yet women outright refuse to take any accountability. So approving this message doesn't mean anything. It just shows women being condescending. And you are assuming things just to fit your feminist narrative. How do you approve of a message that you can't even take accountability for? That sounds condescending to me. How about you women stop lying about how you understand the point being made and that you understand men. Men can see how women don't care. Men know that women don't and can't understand men. Women can't be empathetic of men. But men are expected to be empathetic of women and help them. Again, I want to know, how is this related? The woman asks a question and receives an answer which calls women out and tells them to be better, you say you approve this message but you can't even apply the message. Why this hypocrisy? Why this deceit?
@Love-39You responded beautifully. ⚘️ I am a woman, and I approve this response because like you and the other woman in the post here, I agreed 💯% with what the gentleman in the video stated; and further, you saved me from having to respond to the apparently hurt and misguided individual who desperately tried to group us all in the same proverbial basket. In fact, I admire the man in the video because he's at least striking up a conversation on a much needed topic especially in our community. There are many women who want to be a safe space for their man; and at the end of the day, allowing them to come home and be vulnerable, and know that they are completely loved. It's about being real with each other. 🕊
@@RawEcstacy I see you fail to understand the meaning of a woman agreeing with him, as it very clearly means that she agrees that women need to do better. It only required very basic comprehension skills. And there you are desiring to be argumentative for no reason. Some men would say that's a womanly trait btw.
The home is to be sanctuary and our safe haven. It should never be a place of stress or constant arguments. I enjoy peace and will not disturb it with unnecessary strife.
This was needed to be said. In the beginning of me and my fiancé relationship it was a lot of issues and walls based on our past relationships and childhood experiences. It was hard but conversations like these and the willingness on both our parts completely turned our relationship around. Our communication is 100% better. He is my best friend and I am his. I’m happy we didn’t give up on each other and our relationship.
I always say willingness is a huge factor in relationships if not the biggest. You don’t have to be healed, perfect on paper or know psychology. If you’re willing however you can go a long way. If both parties are genuine and consistent in willingness the partnership will be fulfilling and go the distance. Mature people want both. ❤
This is one of the biggest reasons why I accepted the breakup between myself and someone I thought was my twin flame. He gave up so quickly when things got rough. It alerted me that “maybe this person doesn’t think I’m worth fighting for” and it y to come to that realization but I also know it would have hurt more if we both stayed in a situation where only one of us was willing to work things out.
I feel the same way being labeled as a STRONG, BLACK WOMAN. I'm only strong because I have to be. No, I'm not miserable or bitter or mean. I'm exhausted. No, I'm not complaining when I say I had a hard day at work. I just want to be heard and have someone be on MY SIDE, just for a little bit. Being sensitive to one another isn't a negative. It's humane and necessary in healthy interactions. Keep growing, y'all ✌🏾
No man ever gave you guys that title. You woman called yourself that and society followed. Let’s be real. A strong black woman is what you guys want to be. But when things get tough and tough for a long time now you don’t like being labeled that. Am I wrong?
It always goes back to being about you... Is there ever found to be a video about men where some woman comes in and tries to make it about her or women in general? It is sickening actually... Why most of you are miserable, inability to empathize with anything outside of your own narrative or agenda.
Bruh, at this point in life it’s less about the lie and more about re-membering. The gem in the video was for us to empathize and see ourselves in them. Therefore, sometimes we are going to help them heal their broken pieces and other times they are going to help us heal our broken pieces. More importantly, we need to see that the same way vulnerability can be uncomfortable for us is the same way it can be uncomfortable for them. It less about the lie and more about re-membering. 1. Re-member the stories of our ancestors like Isis and Osiris. Western religions have told us that our ancient African spiritual practices are pagan. That’s THE LIE! 2. Re-member her broken pieces. And it’s our responsibility to allow her to re-member ours. 3. Empathize and be patient, most people do not enjoy looking vulnerable and weak. Does this make sense my brother?
This is the most profound and analytical expression of the struggle most Men have in relationships. Our voice and vulnerability is often shelved for being too sensitive for too often.
I love this! A man has to walk around with body armor through the world. I’m at the door waiting to take it off for him and place it aside while he lays in his safe place. Home is where all that comes off and your woman allows you to show your pure soul, detox from the weight of being a man in the world.
And at the end of the day, men are human too, that being sensitive ain’t exclusive to women. We all have feelings. Whether a man or a woman everyone has different levels of sensitivity, wether it’s more or less, it just depends on the person.
Facts! Women should provide a safe place for their man. You should be the first person he comes to share his every thought and feeling, even if it’s negative. Be there to listen if nothing else.
Agreed 💯 facts. It goes both ways I guess, but remember ladies... and I say this with all due respect... Never ever...ever ever ever use whatever he told you when vulnerable with you against him in any way shape or form. Men don't forget that transgression. Ever. That's why when it happens a man will simply shut down. Period. Much love and respect from a brotha in the Motherland Kenya 🖤
I’ll never forget when my then BF said he did not feel safe coming home to me. Boy I took that shame and ran with it. Ran to UA-cam, books, relationship coaches. I got my life together. It changed my whole life. I had to learn to inspire him. And all the men on my house. 2 sons and a now husband. They need to feel emotionally safe when they walk through those doors to Me. My sons included. Once I did that. They gave me the world.
@@raymondomollo6748shut all the way down. My BF went to homies house for 4-5 Hours everyday after work for 5 years. My family thought he was cheating. I didn’t though. That’s too much work for him 😊. I used to be so mad until I realized he just didn’t feel safe coming home to me.
Shit you ninjas destroy you mean. Any woman would be stupid to be soft with yall ninjas. All yall know how to do is take advantage of the soft and feminine. Not protect. As soon as yall have yall vulnerable moment about yall insecurities or whatever, yall will have the audacity to weaponize your ignorance against your girls’ weaknesses. Just a bunch of snakes.
All facts, no lies told. You ask a man to empathize but he's always in a heightened state on vigilance within the confines of the relationship. There's no logic in that when he's on defense on a consistent basis💯💪🏾
You are like a prey to his softness, he has to be all tightened up around you, you aren’t wired to deal with his challenges, you’ll run and see him as unsafe fit yourself
Absolute truth right there! I served 10 years in a relationship being hard asf! Not because I wanted to but I had to! It wore me out! I lost myself, and journey back has been hell! Why are you so hard?! Because you wouldn’t let me put my guard down for minute… Hell it ruined me….
My name is Amir Bey, that's my wife in the profile picture. He is not lying I've been with my old lady for 17 years now and she's somewhat like what he's saying there are times I can talk to her with my guards down but others where I feel she's not hearing me until l raise my voice and project my anger and frustration then she will say I'm yelling but then realise I'm not and will apologize and we end up talking things out but I never put my hands on her or make her feel scared of me, it's just like he said the world is tough for us men but most especially black men that's all I'm saying and respect it being said on a platform for our women to hear it. Thank you and continued success. By the way I'm 55 and she's 58.
Hi Mr. Bey...I'd like to point out to you that ignoring someone can be the same as physically hitting them in a harmful way. With that in mind think of the conversations you mentioned...when you "project your anger and frustration" you may in fact not be yelling but she can feel some of that and what or how you are feeling in the moment. We all as human have more than 5 senses and one of the extra senses is to feel or sense energy around us it's what helps us know if we should be careful or run away when danger is afoot among other things. So, possibly, to her it feels frustrating too and maybe she hears your words louder as well because she's feeling for you and picking up on that energy. Also women are nurturing by default so she probably wants to comfort you in your time of frustration or anger. I know I can ask alot of questions because that's how I understand what's going on and the answers help me but often people get frustrated with me for trying to understand. So I always offer those people the space to come talk to me when they are ready. With that said maybe when you've had a hard day, explain when you get home to your lady "babe (or whatever you call her) I had a really bad day, I know you'll want to talk about it but I just need some time to myself to process it, then we can talk. Something like that may help avoid any arguments. Because who wants to be frustrated when they're already frustrated. Right? You guys can also seek counseling for other methods of communication. Counseling doesn't always mean that things are bad sometimes it can mean we want things to become even better so we're seeking help from someone outside of us to improve on what we've already built. You guys put in 17 yrs. Y'all should be having lots of fun together now the older you guys get!
I heard a quote from madea of all places but it was something like "you should be able to find peace in your home bc the only other place you'll find it is in the grave" but I love this, sensitivity shows that someone feels safe expressing that, that's not necessarily a bad thing as long as they're able to soothe themselves, too, not making other people walk on eggshells
major facts!! I want my future husband to know that I am his safe place and he never has to worry about me throwing it back in his face if we have a disagreement. I'm a firm believer that when we help each other heal our childhood traumas, our bond will be unbreakable even if we separate❤❤❤
When I say Tripp you are such a beautiful person. I agree. I promise you this is why I have two sons. The heart of a man ❤❤. Well said damn near made me cry.
I totally agree with him. I’m blessed with a husband that is a MAN yet he empathizes and he isn’t afraid to allow me to see his sensitivity . Showing those qualities has allowed us to live in true love, joy and peacefully for 18 years! I love him and thank God for the Man I have.🙏🏽❤️
This is 100 correct !! The problem is also that the women who do allow you to be vulnerable will hold it against you and bring it up in your next argument..
This is very true in alot of women. But a good, strong, understanding woman will hold her man, n hold it down. It's sad to say that, they r few n far between, but they do exist
I agree with what he said especially if he always has to be hard he will take it out in you. I've also learned that some people are so attached to their trauma that when someone that comes along that is willing to let you be just you, they won't know how to receive that and think it's fake. You have to get out of your own way sometimes too
This why he is my favorite!!! What he said absolutely true, and most wisest statement I've heard!!! Thank you, for saying that! I embrace that and see it in men. I love and welcome men who trust me and therefore open up to me. And know it will never be thrown back to them. When we love unconditionally, this is possible!❤❤❤❤❤
It would gave been better if he would have asked her to describe what she means and to give an example. Reason being, there ARE people who are too sensitive about certain things and his response could have been more geared to exactly what she meant.
I love how articulate this man is. I love how he communicate almost effortlessly. I love how you know when a man got that it quality by the way they talk. When he speak he commands attention but so respectfully. I think i might love him 😅😅😅😅😅😂😂😂 JK but I like his style.
I would love for a man to let his guard down with me, it shows the human side of him, I had a man that was so hard and logic at the same time and it did nothing for me but run me away. It was hard trying to get him to open up and when I did he used it against me. I'm so with you on how a man can't go to his partner and open up and the world beating him up is a partner they don't need.
As a sensetive man this means a lot because i was in a relationship where i eas abused and taken advantage of. I felt like no one would want damaged goods or sensetive goods and i havent had any relationship since then. Ive only been a convenient side piece modt of the time. So this helps thank you
I wholeheartedly agree! It’s super hard to be vulnerable nowadays in the world where strength and success reign supreme. At times a man being sensitive is a good thing like he said if I can’t be soft with you…then who ???
Heck yeah! I agree with everything this man said. So true, so accurate and I love it. That means you're a being masculine if you feel that way and not in touch with your femininity.
💯 plus there's strength in sensitivity. There's strength and a whole other level of love and intimacy that comes with vulnerability and sensitivity. It's truly a beautiful thing. 🖤
This hit me in my soul. I never looked at a man the way he said this. N I will never look at men the same way. Ty for opening my soul to see the truth.
Dang, this hit hard! I’m with a man that lost the ability to be sensitive or vulnerable through a horrific childhood and even worse time through his teen years. He lives a life of feeling he has to be hard 24/7, and it’s heartbreaking to watch. We have been together for 14 years but his inability to show or feel sensitivity and to be vulnerable is what is causing our 14 year relationship to literally self destruct. This is why the Bible talks so strongly about guarding your heart so this world doesn’t cause your heart to harden. It’s a very real thing and it truly is heartbreaking
Same bro, it’s like bleeding to a shark, I hope bro closes up and gets sensitive around his bros or real peeps, since you’ll judge him if he gets soft and judge him
All the women agreed when she asked her question. Bro had to break it down in a way that's easier for them to understand how a good majority of men feel. Very well stated.
This brother is truly full of wisdom ❤️☺️. He said a mouth full then 💯💪. On that note, you really can't say anything else because he said it all 🙌🙌🙌💝💕.
True!!! I would love to have a relationship with a man that can actually be vulnerable with himself & me. Too many men have been mistreated & hurt by women and told by other men that they have to be hard or "thugs" with women that it has damaged their ability to be vulnerable and increase their emotional intelligence
People just take advantage of that. It's like we are in a day and age where "fake it to you make it" has become such a "real" way of life, to the point where people have become so "pressed to impress" and are seemingly so disconnected from their inner self, so busy wearing a mask, they have no idea who the are...to sum it all up. 🤷🏾♀️Fake it til you make it, until you come across something like never before, and it's too real for you to deal, so you fumble. Who Are You?
Alot of women are unworthy of being loved...they tear you down but expect you to build and hold them up. They are like grown babies, no matter how beautiful a baby is you get tired of carrying it all the time.
The day women understand that their greatest power is in their femininity and men have tried to nurture and communicate that since a girl is born. It's the reason we handle a baby girl gently and speak to them softly. If this is not nurtured, chances of ending up with a masculine woman are very high.
95% of women I've met my entire life have told me "I don't want a sensitive/soft man, I need me a bad boy/thug". I've dated only 3 women in my life because I "Care" and break ups with them ended with either cheating or them going for an upgrade. Well I've settled with the fact women don't find me attractive or desirable, but once I gave up after a while I noticed I was being chased. My wife made an effort to show me she was more serious and then after a couple of years of dating we got married and will be 9 years this year.
It's annoying that we gotta explain certain shit to women or that women are typically terrible with communication so that's hiw we've been saying this tobthem for years & never get acknowledged
@@GrowUp-zx3lcThis is a clip of a clip. In a longer video she calls her man "soft" so I believe that could constitute "beratement".. although I think there's a better word to use here
I love this.. he’s so on point with everything he said.”get a man that’s hard all the time and see how he handles you” #facts It’s beautiful when a man can show emotions!!
He's right. What man wants to come home being hard he wants his peace when he sees you let his guard down. Women who says this wants a thug man. I just told my daughter met a blessed man who didn't behave thuggish etc. I like that. I can talk to him in a calm manner comfortable. Women need a simp that brings peace in their life not drama, stress,etc. Unless that's what they like💯😊
By sensitive I take that to mean someone who potentially cries a lot and could be depressed. People like that who take everything personal are challenging to deal with whether male or female. In my mind that is different from letting your guard down or being soft.
I think he should have asked her what she meant and why she was saying what she meant. This could have been healthy dialogue for her to truly get clarity about her specific situation. From the clip shown, I didn't hear her say she had an issue with any of those areas. I heard her ask more about the level of his sensitivity. For me looking in, that response to her question is what tears us apart and keeps women against women and men against women. For me, her question wasn't answered it was more like a scold for asking and now looking shameful as though shes not appreciative or she doesn't know how blessed she is vs lets help her based on why shes saying what shes saying and not assume that she doesn't properly take care of his heart or is not a compassionate understanding woman. Because we all face many issues in the world daily especially as African Americans, is why we should seek to communicate effectively and to understand. The case may be he really is too sensitive in the sense that she is taking care of him, but he still requires more. So there could be other issues that he needs to resolve and that she can support him in.... but that she can't be the answer for him. So this will only be understood by asking questions to gain a glimpse into the why. Then, we are able to gleam if I need to be a little more understanding, if you need professional help, or if it's both. I think we have to be patient to understand each other and not always answering with the one size fits all, the assumptions and people clapping up this reality that has been created. We are one, lets be quiet, humble, and seek to understand and educate from there. Even if it's, I don't have the answer but I'll look into it and get back with you. Or maybe you guys need to seek therapy. And then afterwards, it would be a generous gesture for a woman after the ending of the show, to go hug your sister and encourage her on a good job for being brave enough to ask that question in front of an audience because that takes courage because people love attacking and just going in so it makes it uncomfortable to be vulnerable about what you feel. Maybe see if she doesn't mind sharing the details. And you as her sister may be able to provide advice in love which is better coming from a woman. I just feel not just you alls generation, but the world in general, we need to seek to understand then answer from the persons needs not projecting from the place we feel we heard. We too... can be sensitive when we hear certain things and we are quick to respond based on our trigger to it. And women need to stop. Start supporting your sisters men can defend themselves they don't need us interjecting. We are one and all should love each other not choose sides (referring to women in this case.)
Because that's what Tripp does, I think he is in love with the sound of his voice. Always projecting and assuming ish. He goes in with diatribes before really getting the totality of the issue..
@@the_shadow_healer my point exactly. Wrong by whose standards..? She seemed to legitimately wanna know. Explaining why someone's question is not valid enough isnt productive and a bit dismissive. Every question has an answer despite it deserving one.
@@earthangel4971 again listen to what he's saying...he explained that you shouldn't look at men as being soft for expressing emotions. Men are humans, men have emotions, there is absolutely nothing different emotionally between a woman and man, societal constructs created that mindset. So what Tripp is explaining is to not use terms like soft, overly emotional bc those terms are negative. That way of thinking negates the humanity in a man. He didn't say her question was invalid, he literally is explaining why using those terms like soft/emotional can make man not human.
Too many women had to be the the man and the woman, the mom and the dad for decades....so long, it is not easy for a women to be in soft girl mode cause there was too many let downs. Men need to prove you are of God, safe, loyal, loving, a leader, provider and protector.
What does your comment have to do with the subject? She asked “how do you deal with a man being more sensitive than you?” A man has to prove all the things on your list in order for the woman keep from perceiving his vulnerability and soft side as being weak?
@@deshawnpeterson1538 respectfully, I do feel men need to prove their divinity and masculinity first. This is because too many women have been deceived by their representatives.
@@SpiritualLifeCoach43 *This is because too many women have been deceived by their representatives.* That's an excuse because often times the only deception being practiced is self-deception by the woman. That's the truth. I have personally told multiple women not to date men based strictly on the descriptions THEY gave me. And what I warned them of came to pass. That's on them.
This brainwashing because I been in survival mode with my relationships with men because they were coming home taking their anger out on me. Sensitive to everyone but me 🙄 they get real sensitive when I am no longer an option Thanks to me ✌️
This might just be the most accurate relationship statement I’ve ever come across on the internet… ever.
Bro that’s what I’m saying! ✝️🙏🏾
For sure
On God.
💯
Fr fr period
*He is like a sniper. I have never seen him miss. He's necessary for the culture.*
Very nessasary 🎉🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤
When you see the woman at those events speak up and hear his answers, how many do you honestly believe are actually listening and raking it to heart? Do you think women even wanna hear what he has to say, or is just cardi bs, red, Kardashians stallions etc that drive the social norms? I want a womens perspective. Also side note what do u think of women who have platforms, podcast etc and are shaming him the men that think like this and say go get ur bag?
@@agetrobadassYou're pathetic 😂
In My Opinion, The Only Time I Did Find Him Miss Was When He Said Body Count Doesn't Matter Which I Totally Disagree With..
Yesssss, and thank you 🙏🏽
Facts!!! I love a man when he can be vulnerable, I also loved when he said " I don't wanna come home and protect myself from you" I felt that. ❤
Pl😊) l lol
Profound statement right there
@omargreene3048 OMG!! Hello sir What a gorgeous man u are, yeah the man was speaking facts, protecting someone you like or love from yourself is hardly understood, I've seen too many couples go below the belt because they were hurt, talking bout they love each other , 😅 where is the love in how u spoke to each other. I hate to see it, I be getting so sad.
Exactly; that’s why I firmly believe we as a whole should only search for love when we are mentality ready, when he spoke about taking pieces away and expecting him to be empathetic when she needs is a key that shows that most individuals that are in relationships are not open minded or not ready to accept their partner for who they are, this happens on both sides regardless of gender. Why it is imperative to improve yourself day by day, not only for the benefit of others but for yourself as well.
It is a No. You shouldn't cry more than me.
Trip be speaking speaking! I always respect his comments. He always speaks from a place of _”I understand u; but, can u understand me?”_ ❤
He is such a devine being.
Yes I love to hear him speak
What is this souls name
pls?
For bro raw 🫡
Who is he?
Can you imagine what this cat went through to arrive at this kind of wisdom?
Let's face it, ladies... if he can't be whatever he needs to be with you... then he's going to find someone he can be with! ❤
Facs
He's 1 zillion percent correct, and as a woman I approve this message
What has you being a woman got to do with this message? What was the message that you understood? Because from what I understood, he was telling women to be better. To be able to allow their man to be soft with them. Let's be honest here, it is because women don't allow their men to be soft with them, which is what he is talking about. So please help me understand what has this message got to do with you as a woman? What is the correlation and how is it connected? Women dont understand that when a man comes home to their woman and becomes soft, it is because he is letting his guard down. Because you are his woman, not a woman. Because you are his woman, that is why he is able to let his guard down. But women have constantly shit on men who open up to them, women will use it as ammunition in arguments and fights. Are you going to deny that? Do you know why men don't open up? It is because women have shown us time and time again that we shouldnt. This is very important to understand.
"As a woman i approve this message." No, as a man i approve this message. Remember, you brought gender into this.
@Love-39 really? That is your argument? That just because the question was asked by a woman, so you just assume that "as a woman" Is said. What's the correlation? Please explain. What is it that women approve of when you are the ones being discussed about, when women are the ones called to be accountable for their words and actions, yet women outright refuse to take any accountability. So approving this message doesn't mean anything. It just shows women being condescending. And you are assuming things just to fit your feminist narrative. How do you approve of a message that you can't even take accountability for? That sounds condescending to me. How about you women stop lying about how you understand the point being made and that you understand men. Men can see how women don't care. Men know that women don't and can't understand men. Women can't be empathetic of men. But men are expected to be empathetic of women and help them. Again, I want to know, how is this related? The woman asks a question and receives an answer which calls women out and tells them to be better, you say you approve this message but you can't even apply the message. Why this hypocrisy? Why this deceit?
Yep... You and the 98% percent of female attendees that were there 😂😂
@Love-39You responded beautifully. ⚘️ I am a woman, and I approve this response because like you and the other woman in the post here, I agreed 💯% with what the gentleman in the video stated; and further, you saved me from having to respond to the apparently hurt and misguided individual who desperately tried to group us all in the same proverbial basket. In fact, I admire the man in the video because he's at least striking up a conversation on a much needed topic especially in our community. There are many women who want to be a safe space for their man; and at the end of the day, allowing them to come home and be vulnerable, and know that they are completely loved. It's about being real with each other. 🕊
@@RawEcstacy I see you fail to understand the meaning of a woman agreeing with him, as it very clearly means that she agrees that women need to do better. It only required very basic comprehension skills.
And there you are desiring to be argumentative for no reason. Some men would say that's a womanly trait btw.
She was NOT ready for that answer
At all
Wow...Spoken with GODLY WISDOM. You know the truth when you hear it.
Damn he answered on the spot like a natural born orator 🔥 chills
He is spitting truth! My God! My God!
The home is to be sanctuary and our safe haven. It should never be a place of stress or constant arguments. I enjoy peace and will not disturb it with unnecessary strife.
You better say that 🙌🏾
This was needed to be said. In the beginning of me and my fiancé relationship it was a lot of issues and walls based on our past relationships and childhood experiences. It was hard but conversations like these and the willingness on both our parts completely turned our relationship around. Our communication is 100% better. He is my best friend and I am his. I’m happy we didn’t give up on each other and our relationship.
I always say willingness is a huge factor in relationships if not the biggest. You don’t have to be healed, perfect on paper or know psychology. If you’re willing however you can go a long way. If both parties are genuine and consistent in willingness the partnership will be fulfilling and go the distance. Mature people want both. ❤
This is one of the biggest reasons why I accepted the breakup between myself and someone I thought was my twin flame. He gave up so quickly when things got rough. It alerted me that “maybe this person doesn’t think I’m worth fighting for” and it y to come to that realization but I also know it would have hurt more if we both stayed in a situation where only one of us was willing to work things out.
I feel the same way being labeled as a STRONG, BLACK WOMAN. I'm only strong because I have to be. No, I'm not miserable or bitter or mean. I'm exhausted. No, I'm not complaining when I say I had a hard day at work. I just want to be heard and have someone be on MY SIDE, just for a little bit. Being sensitive to one another isn't a negative. It's humane and necessary in healthy interactions. Keep growing, y'all ✌🏾
AMEN 🙏
No man ever gave you guys that title. You woman called yourself that and society followed. Let’s be real. A strong black woman is what you guys want to be. But when things get tough and tough for a long time now you don’t like being labeled that. Am I wrong?
@brentie2604 yep
If I have saw this once I have said it a million times. I do what I have to do
It always goes back to being about you... Is there ever found to be a video about men where some woman comes in and tries to make it about her or women in general? It is sickening actually... Why most of you are miserable, inability to empathize with anything outside of your own narrative or agenda.
Precisely. I believe it’s part of our role in relationships: to strengthen and soften each other, not weaken.
He's right...but it often doesn't happen.
Your pessimism is ironic. He literally just explained why it doesn't happen in some peoples lives.
@@jwil7954 But where is the lie? This doesn't happen in most cases
Bruh, at this point in life it’s less about the lie and more about re-membering. The gem in the video was for us to empathize and see ourselves in them.
Therefore, sometimes we are going to help them heal their broken pieces and other times they are going to help us heal our broken pieces. More importantly, we need to see that the same way vulnerability can be uncomfortable for us is the same way it can be uncomfortable for them.
It less about the lie and more about re-membering.
1. Re-member the stories of our ancestors like Isis and Osiris. Western religions have told us that our ancient African spiritual practices are pagan. That’s THE LIE!
2. Re-member her broken pieces. And it’s our responsibility to allow her to re-member ours.
3. Empathize and be patient, most people do not enjoy looking vulnerable and weak.
Does this make sense my brother?
This is the most profound and analytical expression of the struggle most Men have in relationships. Our voice and vulnerability is often shelved for being too sensitive for too often.
I love this! A man has to walk around with body armor through the world. I’m at the door waiting to take it off for him and place it aside while he lays in his safe place. Home is where all that comes off and your woman allows you to show your pure soul, detox from the weight of being a man in the world.
And at the end of the day, men are human too, that being sensitive ain’t exclusive to women. We all have feelings. Whether a man or a woman everyone has different levels of sensitivity, wether it’s more or less, it just depends on the person.
Facts! Women should provide a safe place for their man. You should be the first person he comes to share his every thought and feeling, even if it’s negative. Be there to listen if nothing else.
Agreed 💯 facts.
It goes both ways I guess, but remember ladies... and I say this with all due respect...
Never ever...ever ever ever use whatever he told you when vulnerable with you against him in any way shape or form.
Men don't forget that transgression. Ever. That's why when it happens a man will simply shut down. Period.
Much love and respect from a brotha in the Motherland Kenya 🖤
A partner should provide a safe space for their partner.
I’ll never forget when my then BF said he did not feel safe coming home to me. Boy I took that shame and ran with it. Ran to UA-cam, books, relationship coaches. I got my life together. It changed my whole life. I had to learn to inspire him. And all the men on my house. 2 sons and a now husband. They need to feel emotionally safe when they walk through those doors to
Me. My sons included. Once I did that. They gave me the world.
@@raymondomollo6748shut all the way down. My BF went to homies house for 4-5 Hours everyday after work for 5 years. My family thought he was cheating. I didn’t though. That’s too much work for him 😊. I used to be so mad until I realized he just didn’t feel safe coming home to me.
@honeyisnatural5❤
Facts. I damn near had this same conversation with my girl last night. Women get mad at you for shit they destroy..
Shit you ninjas destroy you mean. Any woman would be stupid to be soft with yall ninjas. All yall know how to do is take advantage of the soft and feminine. Not protect. As soon as yall have yall vulnerable moment about yall insecurities or whatever, yall will have the audacity to weaponize your ignorance against your girls’ weaknesses. Just a bunch of snakes.
I had to learn this. A man who is vulnerable with you feels safe with you. You are his refuge.
All facts, no lies told. You ask a man to empathize but he's always in a heightened state on vigilance within the confines of the relationship. There's no logic in that when he's on defense on a consistent basis💯💪🏾
You are like a prey to his softness, he has to be all tightened up around you, you aren’t wired to deal with his challenges, you’ll run and see him as unsafe fit yourself
I want to be there emotionally for whoever god sends me. Please lord let him feel comfortable talking to me about anything ❤🙏🏾
This just made me cry now I'm soft lol But naw that's 100% the realest. #LadiesListenLearnRespect
This is an intelligent man. He speaks on facts and not emotions. ❤️🙏
Agreed, I love a man that can tap into his feelings.
Absolute truth right there! I served 10 years in a relationship being hard asf! Not because I wanted to but I had to! It wore me out! I lost myself, and journey back has been hell! Why are you so hard?! Because you wouldn’t let me put my guard down for minute… Hell it ruined me….
Wow!! I love hearing men speak out like this. I wish more men can feel vulnerable to freely express themselves that’s real strength 🙏🏼
😮 Real talk, he hit all the facts that needed to be stated on that topic!
My name is Amir Bey, that's my wife in the profile picture. He is not lying I've been with my old lady for 17 years now and she's somewhat like what he's saying there are times I can talk to her with my guards down but others where I feel she's not hearing me until l raise my voice and project my anger and frustration then she will say I'm yelling but then realise I'm not and will apologize and we end up talking things out but I never put my hands on her or make her feel scared of me, it's just like he said the world is tough for us men but most especially black men that's all I'm saying and respect it being said on a platform for our women to hear it. Thank you and continued success. By the way I'm 55 and she's 58.
Hi Mr. Bey...I'd like to point out to you that ignoring someone can be the same as physically hitting them in a harmful way. With that in mind think of the conversations you mentioned...when you "project your anger and frustration" you may in fact not be yelling but she can feel some of that and what or how you are feeling in the moment. We all as human have more than 5 senses and one of the extra senses is to feel or sense energy around us it's what helps us know if we should be careful or run away when danger is afoot among other things. So, possibly, to her it feels frustrating too and maybe she hears your words louder as well because she's feeling for you and picking up on that energy. Also women are nurturing by default so she probably wants to comfort you in your time of frustration or anger. I know I can ask alot of questions because that's how I understand what's going on and the answers help me but often people get frustrated with me for trying to understand. So I always offer those people the space to come talk to me when they are ready. With that said maybe when you've had a hard day, explain when you get home to your lady "babe (or whatever you call her) I had a really bad day, I know you'll want to talk about it but I just need some time to myself to process it, then we can talk. Something like that may help avoid any arguments. Because who wants to be frustrated when they're already frustrated. Right? You guys can also seek counseling for other methods of communication. Counseling doesn't always mean that things are bad sometimes it can mean we want things to become even better so we're seeking help from someone outside of us to improve on what we've already built. You guys put in 17 yrs. Y'all should be having lots of fun together now the older you guys get!
I heard a quote from madea of all places but it was something like "you should be able to find peace in your home bc the only other place you'll find it is in the grave" but I love this, sensitivity shows that someone feels safe expressing that, that's not necessarily a bad thing as long as they're able to soothe themselves, too, not making other people walk on eggshells
SHEEEEEESSSSSSHHHHH! This man couldn’t have said it better. God bless him. Speaking is his gift!
major facts!! I want my future husband to know that I am his safe place and he never has to worry about me throwing it back in his face if we have a disagreement. I'm a firm believer that when we help each other heal our childhood traumas, our bond will be unbreakable even if we separate❤❤❤
Wow 🙏🙏🙏🙏
So deep and so TRUE, Damn talk that talk brother ❤️ Every single word ❤️❤️❤️
When I say Tripp you are such a beautiful person. I agree. I promise you this is why I have two sons. The heart of a man ❤❤. Well said damn near made me cry.
I totally agree with him. I’m blessed with a husband that is a MAN yet he empathizes and he isn’t afraid to allow me to see his sensitivity . Showing those qualities has allowed us to live in true love, joy and peacefully for 18 years! I love him and thank God for the Man I have.🙏🏽❤️
This is 100 correct !! The problem is also that the women who do allow you to be vulnerable will hold it against you and bring it up in your next argument..
Maann😮💨
Only the wrong women.
This is very true in alot of women. But a good, strong, understanding woman will hold her man, n hold it down. It's sad to say that, they r few n far between, but they do exist
Men do the same though
The ole men do it too reply from the woman. So they wont feel alone in having to be accountable.
Lord, let me be his soft (safe) space 🙏 ❤.
Keeping Speaking Yo TRUTH. I needed to Hear that.....
❤❤THIS- stop being confined to ‘training’ that the wrong folks have taught about relationships. Speak this-Be thiS🙌🏾
My guy TRIPP never f_cking miss yall! Like fr fr.... my man is 💯% correct!!
I agree with what he said especially if he always has to be hard he will take it out in you. I've also learned that some people are so attached to their trauma that when someone that comes along that is willing to let you be just you, they won't know how to receive that and think it's fake. You have to get out of your own way sometimes too
This why he is my favorite!!! What he said absolutely true, and most wisest statement I've heard!!! Thank you, for saying that! I embrace that and see it in men. I love and welcome men who trust me and therefore open up to me. And know it will never be thrown back to them. When we love unconditionally, this is possible!❤❤❤❤❤
❤Trip!!! His Lady is lucky to have him. Hope he has a brother similar 😊
It would gave been better if he would have asked her to describe what she means and to give an example. Reason being, there ARE people who are too sensitive about certain things and his response could have been more geared to exactly what she meant.
GOD Bless us all Amen ❤
Protect this brother at all cost 💯🙏
Preach it brother...thank you - let a man know that it's okay to be vulnerable in his own safe place...beside his woman.❤
I love how articulate this man is. I love how he communicate almost effortlessly. I love how you know when a man got that it quality by the way they talk. When he speak he commands attention but so respectfully. I think i might love him 😅😅😅😅😅😂😂😂 JK but I like his style.
Notice fellas how she said zero about what he said and EVERYTHING about how he said it.
As a man, I aspire to be as articulate, & emotionally intelligent.
ABSOLUTELY TRUTHFUL 👏 👏👏💯
I would love for a man to let his guard down with me, it shows the human side of him, I had a man that was so hard and logic at the same time and it did nothing for me but run me away. It was hard trying to get him to open up and when I did he used it against me. I'm so with you on how a man can't go to his partner and open up and the world beating him up is a partner they don't need.
As a sensetive man this means a lot because i was in a relationship where i eas abused and taken advantage of. I felt like no one would want damaged goods or sensetive goods and i havent had any relationship since then. Ive only been a convenient side piece modt of the time. So this helps thank you
Yup!!! I agree with him.
I wholeheartedly agree! It’s super hard to be vulnerable nowadays in the world where strength and success reign supreme. At times a man being sensitive is a good thing like he said if I can’t be soft with you…then who ???
Heck yeah! I agree with everything this man said. So true, so accurate and I love it. That means you're a being masculine if you feel that way and not in touch with your femininity.
Help her out brother…break the chains of conditioning!
All facts no lies.
💯 plus there's strength in sensitivity. There's strength and a whole other level of love and intimacy that comes with vulnerability and sensitivity. It's truly a beautiful thing. 🖤
Finding the softness in me made women take my kindness for weakness. As I as get aggressive they start acting right. 💯💯💯
Facts! I’ve learned to one give my kindness to those who deserve it. Peace my brother
Be careful who you give your heart to….Self awareness & self consciousness once you crack that you’ll know who to open up to
You are around the wrong women, bruh, change your environment
Please heal but have more discernment in the next partner you choose. A match would not take advantage.
@@Manoftomorrow6491I'm guessing that HE IS the wrong environment.
This hit me in my soul. I never looked at a man the way he said this. N I will never look at men the same way. Ty for opening my soul to see the truth.
He's right i need that quality in.my man
All Facts!!!
Dang, this hit hard! I’m with a man that lost the ability to be sensitive or vulnerable through a horrific childhood and even worse time through his teen years. He lives a life of feeling he has to be hard 24/7, and it’s heartbreaking to watch. We have been together for 14 years but his inability to show or feel sensitivity and to be vulnerable is what is causing our 14 year relationship to literally self destruct. This is why the Bible talks so strongly about guarding your heart so this world doesn’t cause your heart to harden. It’s a very real thing and it truly is heartbreaking
Ah well…
Are you doing anything to help?
You were together for 14 years and he never opened up? Sounds like you werent the safety he required. You were the problem
@@stefanmatton8778I’m saying sound like he don’t trust her with his feelings 😂
Same bro, it’s like bleeding to a shark, I hope bro closes up and gets sensitive around his bros or real peeps, since you’ll judge him if he gets soft and judge him
LOVE THIS BROTHERS TRUTH!!!❤
Pray for this next generation
All facts!!! Never betray a man’s, especially a good man’s, vulnerability. It’s hard for him to open up in the first place.
This young man knocked it out the park. I wish I could give a million thumbs up.
All the women agreed when she asked her question. Bro had to break it down in a way that's easier for them to understand how a good majority of men feel. Very well stated.
This brother is truly full of wisdom ❤️☺️. He said a mouth full then 💯💪. On that note, you really can't say anything else because he said it all 🙌🙌🙌💝💕.
True!!! I would love to have a relationship with a man that can actually be vulnerable with himself & me. Too many men have been mistreated & hurt by women and told by other men that they have to be hard or "thugs" with women that it has damaged their ability to be vulnerable and increase their emotional intelligence
I love his mind! All women should want a man that thinks this way!!!
People just take advantage of that.
It's like we are in a day and age where "fake it to you make it" has become such a "real" way of life, to the point where people have become so "pressed to impress" and are seemingly so disconnected from their inner self, so busy wearing a mask, they have no idea who the are...to sum it all up. 🤷🏾♀️Fake it til you make it, until you come across something like never before, and it's too real for you to deal, so you fumble.
Who Are You?
Well said and the message translated differently without using the N word. 🌟
💜🫂 AMEN!
Absolute wow!! I never thought I'd hear this on one of these podcast. I can't add or subtract to it. Well said my G.
Alot of women are unworthy of being loved...they tear you down but expect you to build and hold them up. They are like grown babies, no matter how beautiful a baby is you get tired of carrying it all the time.
This young man has had some BEAUTIFUL TEACHING. AND FOR THIS GOD I SAY THANK YOU.💛💜
The day women understand that their greatest power is in their femininity and men have tried to nurture and communicate that since a girl is born. It's the reason we handle a baby girl gently and speak to them softly. If this is not nurtured, chances of ending up with a masculine woman are very high.
I am IN LOVE with every single one of his words. Food for thought ladies, And I'll definitely take another portion😌🤲🏼🫶🏼
95% of women I've met my entire life have told me "I don't want a sensitive/soft man, I need me a bad boy/thug". I've dated only 3 women in my life because I "Care" and break ups with them ended with either cheating or them going for an upgrade. Well I've settled with the fact women don't find me attractive or desirable, but once I gave up after a while I noticed I was being chased. My wife made an effort to show me she was more serious and then after a couple of years of dating we got married and will be 9 years this year.
It's annoying that we gotta explain certain shit to women or that women are typically terrible with communication so that's hiw we've been saying this tobthem for years & never get acknowledged
@@GrowUp-zx3lcThis is a clip of a clip. In a longer video she calls her man "soft" so I believe that could constitute "beratement".. although I think there's a better word to use here
I love this.. he’s so on point with everything he said.”get a man that’s hard all the time and see how he handles you” #facts It’s beautiful when a man can show emotions!!
He's right. What man wants to come home being hard he wants his peace when he sees you let his guard down. Women who says this wants a thug man. I just told my daughter met a blessed man who didn't behave thuggish etc. I like that. I can talk to him in a calm manner comfortable. Women need a simp that brings peace in their life not drama, stress,etc. Unless that's what they like💯😊
I do agree.. but he still didn’t answer her question 🤨 lol
Preach it brotha
By sensitive I take that to mean someone who potentially cries a lot and could be depressed. People like that who take everything personal are challenging to deal with whether male or female. In my mind that is different from letting your guard down or being soft.
Well talk it's simple make sure you got a woman who open to listen
Being soft and sassy are two different things. Choose wisely!
That's tough
Thiiiiiissssss part. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Man I stumbled into this and he is "Preaching "....💯✌🏾
I think he should have asked her what she meant and why she was saying what she meant. This could have been healthy dialogue for her to truly get clarity about her specific situation. From the clip shown, I didn't hear her say she had an issue with any of those areas. I heard her ask more about the level of his sensitivity. For me looking in, that response to her question is what tears us apart and keeps women against women and men against women. For me, her question wasn't answered it was more like a scold for asking and now looking shameful as though shes not appreciative or she doesn't know how blessed she is vs lets help her based on why shes saying what shes saying and not assume that she doesn't properly take care of his heart or is not a compassionate understanding woman. Because we all face many issues in the world daily especially as African Americans, is why we should seek to communicate effectively and to understand. The case may be he really is too sensitive in the sense that she is taking care of him, but he still requires more. So there could be other issues that he needs to resolve and that she can support him in.... but that she can't be the answer for him. So this will only be understood by asking questions to gain a glimpse into the why. Then, we are able to gleam if I need to be a little more understanding, if you need professional help, or if it's both. I think we have to be patient to understand each other and not always answering with the one size fits all, the assumptions and people clapping up this reality that has been created. We are one, lets be quiet, humble, and seek to understand and educate from there. Even if it's, I don't have the answer but I'll look into it and get back with you. Or maybe you guys need to seek therapy. And then afterwards, it would be a generous gesture for a woman after the ending of the show, to go hug your sister and encourage her on a good job for being brave enough to ask that question in front of an audience because that takes courage because people love attacking and just going in so it makes it uncomfortable to be vulnerable about what you feel. Maybe see if she doesn't mind sharing the details. And you as her sister may be able to provide advice in love which is better coming from a woman. I just feel not just you alls generation, but the world in general, we need to seek to understand then answer from the persons needs not projecting from the place we feel we heard. We too... can be sensitive when we hear certain things and we are quick to respond based on our trigger to it. And women need to stop. Start supporting your sisters men can defend themselves they don't need us interjecting. We are one and all should love each other not choose sides (referring to women in this case.)
Because that's what Tripp does, I think he is in love with the sound of his voice. Always projecting and assuming ish. He goes in with diatribes before really getting the totality of the issue..
Thank you. I felt the same. What was he answering without specifics?
He still really didn't answer her question tho as honest as this was.
Take a another listen, he literally explained why her line of questioning is wrong.
@@the_shadow_healer my point exactly. Wrong by whose standards..? She seemed to legitimately wanna know. Explaining why someone's question is not valid enough isnt productive and a bit dismissive. Every question has an answer despite it deserving one.
@@earthangel4971 again listen to what he's saying...he explained that you shouldn't look at men as being soft for expressing emotions. Men are humans, men have emotions, there is absolutely nothing different emotionally between a woman and man, societal constructs created that mindset. So what Tripp is explaining is to not use terms like soft, overly emotional bc those terms are negative. That way of thinking negates the humanity in a man. He didn't say her question was invalid, he literally is explaining why using those terms like soft/emotional can make man not human.
He didn’t answer her question, because that was the wrong question to ask
@@Manoftomorrow6491there's no wrong question. Even when you ask google a supposedly wrong question, it asks you "did you mean......"
WOOOWWWW..definitely taking notes. I heard EVERY word of this. Thank you❤
Absolutely 💯💯💯💯
Too many women had to be the the man and the woman, the mom and the dad for decades....so long, it is not easy for a women to be in soft girl mode cause there was too many let downs. Men need to prove you are of God, safe, loyal, loving, a leader, provider and protector.
What does your comment have to do with the subject? She asked “how do you deal with a man being more sensitive than you?” A man has to prove all the things on your list in order for the woman keep from perceiving his vulnerability and soft side as being weak?
@@deshawnpeterson1538 respectfully, I do feel men need to prove their divinity and masculinity first. This is because too many women have been deceived by their representatives.
@@SpiritualLifeCoach43
*This is because too many women have been deceived by their representatives.*
That's an excuse because often times the only deception being practiced is self-deception by the woman. That's the truth. I have personally told multiple women not to date men based strictly on the descriptions THEY gave me. And what I warned them of came to pass. That's on them.
@SpiritualLifeCoach43 so are saying a men has to earn the right to be soft and sensitive around you?
@@SpiritualLifeCoach43women fell into that trap, and they like where they are.
This brainwashing because I been in survival mode with my relationships with men because they were coming home taking their anger out on me. Sensitive to everyone but me 🙄 they get real sensitive when I am no longer an option Thanks to me ✌️
Wise words being spoken!!!