I've tested INFP every year since I was 21. I'm 27 now. I used to be the kind of INFP where I would sit and silently want people to notice, to understand, to be curious enough to ask about me. I let others change the way I acted. But the one thing that changed that was a single psychology class I took when I was 21. More specifically, a test that my psychology teacher had us take. The Meyer's Briggs Personality Test. The first time I took the test, I was the only person in the class that tested INFP. I was also the only person that stayed after to talk with my teacher about psychology. That was the moment I started to change. I soon realized that I didn't have to let the world rock me, but instead I could rock the world. I got involved in clubs, friend groups, classes, events. I became a leader in the live streams I moderate for and the clubs I lead. I soon had people following me and appreciating me for my unique personality. And of course, I still have moments where I turn back into the highly-emotional, introverted and self-conscious INFP-T that I first tested as. I still get picked on, stepped on, judged and talked down to, but I also have learned that my voice, the one ruled by my values, has meaning and I refuse to let anyone silence that. I may put all my energy into socializing at the moment and may not have time to be in my own head as much, but right now I rule the inner world my brain owns. Thank you Erik for the affirmations. We are INFP- Independent, Noble, Ferocious and Proud.
1. Keep busy - it will take your mind off how sh1t life is 2. Keep trying, keep striving - Trust me if you give up things will just get even worse 3. Keep going - When you can't see a future, just take it one day at a time
Don't expect validation from others and realize you are valuable without expecting others to express that to you. Give yourself a pep talk every day and trust your intuition INFP. Be thankful we don't need the applause of others to know we are on the right path. It is better to have self-understanding than to have others understand you or to feel the let down when others don't understand. Thank you Erik for the reminder.
Its been a constant in life. No one else will ever care about my thoughts or feelings. Not always out of malice but often out of indifference. I wasted a lot of time because I thought everyone thought like me, that if I could just explain myself enough it would click with someone. I would rather sit by a river, be on a mountain, listen to the forrest or watch the ocean than be around anyone.
I just had a guy hate on me for making a video about love.. He said don't be so vulnerable whats wrong with you? Some people will hate you for being true and genuine, even other infp. Never let fear control you. Its the only thing that is holding you back. And never be afraid to be yourself :)
@@ErikThor Ya that's true but maybe he grew up in a atmosphere where you can't talk about love in a good way . Actually the thing you said is absolutely right , sometimes I do feel none in this society will understand me . But even if none understands you , you have to speak out too..
I have been writing fir 20 years in messageboards and now YT. I write about love, trust, truth, spiritual growth, etc. I am mostly ignored--- an especially by those that say they know about love, trust, spiritual growth, etc. Other INFPs. _"To know love is to know trust; to know oneself is to know truth."_ cc 👀🐡🌾🌿
As an INFP having gone through this shit long enough...sometimes I just want to give up. Sometimes I'm just at the end of the rope. I would truly rather die than give up those core identity aspects of myself just to fit in. It is exhausting. In theory, it all sounds nice...just do a little of this and a little of that, and you'll just cheer up and it will all fall into place. Some days I can handle it enough, other days I literally wish I no longer dealt with the burden of existence. It is wretched to be in this swamp of despair, but for the INFP there is hardly a way out once the awareness of irreconcilable difference has manifested.
Hello, mister Thor! Thank you for making this video with such a good timing on loneliness. I just wanted to add a perspective on the first part of your video discussing how because of our introversion and constant introspection upon ourselves, we feel lonely. I wanted to mention perhaps the reason. When we spend such a grand amount of time refining and rebuilding and making a handiwork (an analogy for our personality), it is very difficult to find someone who would appreciate every single detail and every nuance that was put into the work. Connection stems from being understood or at least appreciated as a person, and it requires a great commitment from another party to spend the time and energy to look into and understand every fraction. As you said, we cannot possibly compromise and let them miss even the slightest of detail, and therefore it's difficult to find someone like that. That at least, Is my personal experience of the "INFP loneliness phenomenon". Not finding someone who has such level of commitment, even in simple friendships.
On the contrary,we may treat others with such gravity of commitment that it may be too much for them or may be see too deep within themselves they may not even realise. That’s may cause them withdraw from the relationship too. That’s another reason I as an infp found we may feel or even fear to be lonely. Because we care too much and deep that’s we may drive people away
"Feel like you can't complete your school degree" the amount of times that I almost droped out is remakable, just made it because I didn't go to school 1/4 of the days
Its taken me a lifetime to understand this wisdom, but I am right there with you on this. "Let your values speak for themselves" hits at the core pattern that I have seen in myself. I have gotten frustrated trying to justify myself intellectually and when I hear eloquent people telling me there is something wrong with my way of thinking or confused at my way of processing I don't really know how to respond, but in no way is that a concession. It follows that if you cannot articulate your reasoning it is a weaker position, but I don't deny flaws in myself, it is the process I am fine tuning. It is not just intellectual cohesion that convinces me. It is the results of trying on a way of being that produces good results. What should you value? I feel it is important not to tear down other people and even when their values conflict with my own I feel good about finding what is admirable in them and encouraging honest discussion and letting them stand their ground or provide resistance. Other people are free to go their own way and good luck to them. In all honesty I have had people angry at me who do not have their lives together. What values ripple out into healthy happy families, jobs, friendships? I have my own priorities and I think there is a kind of wisdom in focusing on character and inner-ordering. But I totally relate to this advice about this system of protection. It is something that makes us more resilient. We have to continue to nurture that inner flame and cultivate tranquility and peace. In order to do that we have to find a way to not be defensive when people push against us or social pressures demand we conform to some way of thinking that does not feel right. It makes us feel like we have no home. We must make boundaries for ourselves. It is not about being overly protective, fragile and out of touch. But we need a cushion for the way the world acts upon us. We can assert our ideas and expose ourselves to criticism but we can also give ourselves the space to be real that no ones else seems to want to give. We can meditate and feel what we are about and how we are aligned. We are programmed differently but there is something real and genuine to this way of being. Its different. Not everyone needs to be this way, but it is not naive or stupid.
It's so weird how you can know so much about me from knowing the traits of this personality type lol. I really feel the strong feeling of no one understanding me and it's so annoying when I try to explain, it doesn't work and I often give up and just feel more misunderstood... It's hard to think about how I can stop having social anxiety, it seems like it's just part of my personality. I can't envision myself ever being in a role of talking to people, of having responsibilities, this is the problem. I simultaneously want to go out and be part of the world and also want no one to ever see me. Right now I'm trying to figure out who I actually want to be but it's very hard to envision how I want to be, especially because I'm interested in so many different things ha!
Somehow I've normalized that nobody wants to talk about the dephts of the mind or the peculiarities of the universe. I'm happy by having this thoughts on my own, because that makes me feel I have a purpose and can help others on different ways.
After i take my MBTI test, i watch all video about infps, to understand my self and I came across this video, wow.. you'r video so helping, so precious erik! Thanks a lot..
Great video and great comments. I also want to add… I hope I’m not the only one that enjoys the little sparkles ✨ when I hit the like button. Cool addition, just saying.
Thanks a lot, Erik. I needed to hear this today. It's really amazing how important it is to meditate and listen to yourself. I haven't been meditating recently, and I have been feeling more and more disconnected from the world. I've also been feeling the need to explain myself all the time. It's time for me to start meditating regularly. 😇
We are not alone... other INFPs exist and often they are our music idols and when we hear there music it reaffirms us again, we are not alone in such thoughts
thank you for this video.it's a little nice that people understand you.it makes me very tired to understand the infp personality, but it's an interesting experience to be like this.a strange shy happiness arises when you realize that you are like this.
I love your videos! These help me to feel less alone. You help me to understand myself better. I can’t Tell how good it is to know that i am not alone and there are people out there who feel the same way. INFP power people! We CAN get trough everything! ❤️
3:34 😭 I am literally feeling depressed because I feel like I'm on my last straw of people unfairly judging me for my profile picture when they don't know me from Adam... I feel like I need to just change my profile picture JUST to be left alone but I'd sacrificing a piece of myself that allows me to express myself and that I love. JUST to be taken seriously. I deserve to be treated with respect because I am human. But I also just want this to stop... But I also want to be me. Authentically ME. And I can't be. It's not fair, I want BOTH. Why can't I have both... 💔
Thanks for this video .. it really explains me , I saw many videos , I can relate with all those too but not this much ,because you are an INFP that's why you understand us . The thing is sometimes I act like INFP A but sometimes like INFP T .. now I can change those weak points of mine too so thanks for this once again.😊
As an infp (i gues) I don't think we are the most introverted, I've learned lots of ways to beet that social anxiety, sometimes,yeah is overwhelming but nothing we cant handle
Nah, infp's are actually quite social introverts. Great conversationalists. It really depends on the situation or setting more than anything else, whether we talk a lot or not.
Not sure if i´m assertive or turbulent, it seem to depend on the situation and how confident i feel about it, but anyway this was exactly what i needed to hear. Liked and subbed.
your channel is helping me so so much. I feel like this better understanding of myself is giving me permission to be who I am without feeling like I have to maintain some sort of outwardly appearance that'll make people feel more comfortable. we're pretty fucking cool. (this is most likely that confidence you talked about in another video that lasts for no more than a day) lol nice
Having been born into a family of 8 with more than half intuitives (N), I have an INFP sister and a ISFP brother and both r extremely introverted but there is a distinct difference bet the two but their values r withdrawn and secretive. Their communication sucks until they do soemthing about it.
Seems to me that the overly self centered egocentric side of the INFP can also be at times negative, even egotistical and possibly our greatest weakness or blind spot. Like two sides of the same coin, strong sense of self and convictions which is good but a shadow side of being a potential ego maniac. Relationships and connectedness with others help to temper that in my opinion. lol, I'm no typologist just looking at my own growth patterns and thinking about my observations and interaction with INFP friends.
I've tested INFP every year since I was 21. I'm 27 now. I used to be the kind of INFP where I would sit and silently want people to notice, to understand, to be curious enough to ask about me. I let others change the way I acted. But the one thing that changed that was a single psychology class I took when I was 21. More specifically, a test that my psychology teacher had us take. The Meyer's Briggs Personality Test. The first time I took the test, I was the only person in the class that tested INFP. I was also the only person that stayed after to talk with my teacher about psychology. That was the moment I started to change. I soon realized that I didn't have to let the world rock me, but instead I could rock the world. I got involved in clubs, friend groups, classes, events. I became a leader in the live streams I moderate for and the clubs I lead. I soon had people following me and appreciating me for my unique personality. And of course, I still have moments where I turn back into the highly-emotional, introverted and self-conscious INFP-T that I first tested as. I still get picked on, stepped on, judged and talked down to, but I also have learned that my voice, the one ruled by my values, has meaning and I refuse to let anyone silence that.
I may put all my energy into socializing at the moment and may not have time to be in my own head as much, but right now I rule the inner world my brain owns.
Thank you Erik for the affirmations.
We are INFP- Independent, Noble, Ferocious and Proud.
I been feeling this way since I tried LSD xD
I personally recommend LSD, makes my brain go brrr xS
hey thanks a bunch for this comment, im also an infp who wants others to notice me, and this just gave me so much inspiration, thank you sm infp
1. Keep busy - it will take your mind off how sh1t life is
2. Keep trying, keep striving - Trust me if you give up things will just get even worse
3. Keep going - When you can't see a future, just take it one day at a time
Don't expect validation from others and realize you are valuable without expecting others to express that to you. Give yourself a pep talk every day and trust your intuition INFP. Be thankful we don't need the applause of others to know we are on the right path. It is better to have self-understanding than to have others understand you or to feel the let down when others don't understand. Thank you Erik for the reminder.
Its been a constant in life. No one else will ever care about my thoughts or feelings. Not always out of malice but often out of indifference. I wasted a lot of time because I thought everyone thought like me, that if I could just explain myself enough it would click with someone.
I would rather sit by a river, be on a mountain, listen to the forrest or watch the ocean than be around anyone.
What do you need to say that no one can hear
I just had a guy hate on me for making a video about love.. He said don't be so vulnerable whats wrong with you? Some people will hate you for being true and genuine, even other infp. Never let fear control you. Its the only thing that is holding you back. And never be afraid to be yourself :)
That guy doesnt sound too mature LOL
@@ErikThor yeah well.. if you stand for something you must have opposition right ? :)
@@andytheindividual3862 Exactly you are right no matter how much we try we can't convince everyone to agree with us . But still we have to stand up .
@@ErikThor Ya that's true but maybe he grew up in a atmosphere where you can't talk about love in a good way . Actually the thing you said is absolutely right , sometimes I do feel none in this society will understand me . But even if none understands you , you have to speak out too..
I have been writing fir 20 years in messageboards and now YT.
I write about love, trust, truth, spiritual growth, etc. I am mostly ignored--- an especially by those that say they know about love, trust, spiritual growth, etc.
Other INFPs.
_"To know love is to know trust; to know oneself is to know truth."_
cc 👀🐡🌾🌿
As an INFP having gone through this shit long enough...sometimes I just want to give up. Sometimes I'm just at the end of the rope. I would truly rather die than give up those core identity aspects of myself just to fit in. It is exhausting. In theory, it all sounds nice...just do a little of this and a little of that, and you'll just cheer up and it will all fall into place. Some days I can handle it enough, other days I literally wish I no longer dealt with the burden of existence. It is wretched to be in this swamp of despair, but for the INFP there is hardly a way out once the awareness of irreconcilable difference has manifested.
If you ever wrote a book I would totally buy it
The more u follow ur heart ❤️ the more lonely u feel 🙄.. dude but we like to follow our heart 💜
Hello, mister Thor!
Thank you for making this video with such a good timing on loneliness.
I just wanted to add a perspective on the first part of your video discussing how because of our introversion and constant introspection upon ourselves, we feel lonely. I wanted to mention perhaps the reason.
When we spend such a grand amount of time refining and rebuilding and making a handiwork (an analogy for our personality), it is very difficult to find someone who would appreciate every single detail and every nuance that was put into the work.
Connection stems from being understood or at least appreciated as a person, and it requires a great commitment from another party to spend the time and energy to look into and understand every fraction. As you said, we cannot possibly compromise and let them miss even the slightest of detail, and therefore it's difficult to find someone like that.
That at least, Is my personal experience of the "INFP loneliness phenomenon". Not finding someone who has such level of commitment, even in simple friendships.
On the contrary,we may treat others with such gravity of commitment that it may be too much for them or may be see too deep within themselves they may not even realise.
That’s may cause them withdraw from the relationship too.
That’s another reason I as an infp found we may feel or even fear to be lonely.
Because we care too much and deep that’s we may drive people away
"Feel like you can't complete your school degree" the amount of times that I almost droped out is remakable, just made it because I didn't go to school 1/4 of the days
Its taken me a lifetime to understand this wisdom, but I am right there with you on this. "Let your values speak for themselves" hits at the core pattern that I have seen in myself. I have gotten frustrated trying to justify myself intellectually and when I hear eloquent people telling me there is something wrong with my way of thinking or confused at my way of processing I don't really know how to respond, but in no way is that a concession. It follows that if you cannot articulate your reasoning it is a weaker position, but I don't deny flaws in myself, it is the process I am fine tuning. It is not just intellectual cohesion that convinces me. It is the results of trying on a way of being that produces good results. What should you value? I feel it is important not to tear down other people and even when their values conflict with my own I feel good about finding what is admirable in them and encouraging honest discussion and letting them stand their ground or provide resistance. Other people are free to go their own way and good luck to them. In all honesty I have had people angry at me who do not have their lives together. What values ripple out into healthy happy families, jobs, friendships? I have my own priorities and I think there is a kind of wisdom in focusing on character and inner-ordering.
But I totally relate to this advice about this system of protection. It is something that makes us more resilient. We have to continue to nurture that inner flame and cultivate tranquility and peace. In order to do that we have to find a way to not be defensive when people push against us or social pressures demand we conform to some way of thinking that does not feel right. It makes us feel like we have no home. We must make boundaries for ourselves. It is not about being overly protective, fragile and out of touch. But we need a cushion for the way the world acts upon us. We can assert our ideas and expose ourselves to criticism but we can also give ourselves the space to be real that no ones else seems to want to give. We can meditate and feel what we are about and how we are aligned. We are programmed differently but there is something real and genuine to this way of being. Its different. Not everyone needs to be this way, but it is not naive or stupid.
It's so weird how you can know so much about me from knowing the traits of this personality type lol. I really feel the strong feeling of no one understanding me and it's so annoying when I try to explain, it doesn't work and I often give up and just feel more misunderstood... It's hard to think about how I can stop having social anxiety, it seems like it's just part of my personality. I can't envision myself ever being in a role of talking to people, of having responsibilities, this is the problem. I simultaneously want to go out and be part of the world and also want no one to ever see me. Right now I'm trying to figure out who I actually want to be but it's very hard to envision how I want to be, especially because I'm interested in so many different things ha!
Somehow I've normalized that nobody wants to talk about the dephts of the mind or the peculiarities of the universe. I'm happy by having this thoughts on my own, because that makes me feel I have a purpose and can help others on different ways.
After i take my MBTI test, i watch all video about infps, to understand my self and I came across this video, wow.. you'r video so helping, so precious erik! Thanks a lot..
Great video and great comments. I also want to add… I hope I’m not the only one that enjoys the little sparkles ✨ when I hit the like button. Cool addition, just saying.
Wow... it feels good to know someone that understands me
Thanks a lot, Erik. I needed to hear this today. It's really amazing how important it is to meditate and listen to yourself. I haven't been meditating recently, and I have been feeling more and more disconnected from the world. I've also been feeling the need to explain myself all the time. It's time for me to start meditating regularly. 😇
We are not alone... other INFPs exist and often they are our music idols and when we hear there music it reaffirms us again, we are not alone in such thoughts
Thank you Erik, this was helpful! Happy Belated Birthday 🥳
Thanks Angie, hope you are well 🥰
@@ErikThor thank you! the weather in my area of California is very nice right now, IMO 🌤
thank you for this video.it's a little nice that people understand you.it makes me very tired to understand the infp personality, but it's an interesting experience to be like this.a strange shy happiness arises when you realize that you are like this.
I love your videos! These help me to feel less alone. You help me to understand myself better. I can’t Tell how good it is to know that i am not alone and there are people out there who feel the same way. INFP power people! We CAN get trough everything! ❤️
Ya I have given up explaining myself 👍I have had enough of it 😤
3:34 😭 I am literally feeling depressed because I feel like I'm on my last straw of people unfairly judging me for my profile picture when they don't know me from Adam... I feel like I need to just change my profile picture JUST to be left alone but I'd sacrificing a piece of myself that allows me to express myself and that I love. JUST to be taken seriously. I deserve to be treated with respect because I am human. But I also just want this to stop... But I also want to be me. Authentically ME. And I can't be. It's not fair, I want BOTH. Why can't I have both... 💔
Beautiful! I needed this perspective today. A next step for growth. Thank you.
Thanks for this video .. it really explains me , I saw many videos , I can relate with all those too but not this much ,because you are an INFP that's why you understand us . The thing is sometimes I act like INFP A but sometimes like INFP T .. now I can change those weak points of mine too so thanks for this once again.😊
As an infp (i gues) I don't think we are the most introverted, I've learned lots of ways to beet that social anxiety, sometimes,yeah is overwhelming but nothing we cant handle
Nah, infp's are actually quite social introverts. Great conversationalists. It really depends on the situation or setting more than anything else, whether we talk a lot or not.
My whole life been bullied. Add up my ugly looks plus infp equals very difficult life. I am 36 and still not being respected by coworkers and others.
Thank you for this video. I've always struggled with loneliness.
Not sure if i´m assertive or turbulent, it seem to depend on the situation and how confident i feel about it, but anyway this was exactly what i needed to hear. Liked and subbed.
it can change
your channel is helping me so so much. I feel like this better understanding of myself is giving me permission to be who I am without feeling like I have to maintain some sort of outwardly appearance that'll make people feel more comfortable. we're pretty fucking cool. (this is most likely that confidence you talked about in another video that lasts for no more than a day) lol nice
Heartbreak Hotel by Elvis Presley is the ultimate INFP song
I think your the only one who understands me
Wow 😳 was feeling that today n ur video popped up 👍
Hope you get a chance to reconnect soon ❤️
Hope you get a chance to reconnect soon ❤️
Hi Erik, can you make a video for INFPs to help them open up to other people too?
So glad I watched this as it has confirmed for me that I am on the right track. Thank you xx
5:00 I need a leap of faith pill or something 😣😭😵
thank you so much! i needed this today
You are great! Thank you so much!
Great video, very helpful for me thank you! 🙂👏
Great video!
This is the most helpful video on youtube for me . Thank you so much ❤️
Really nice video Mr. Thor. :)
Thank you Mr. Thor🙃
i needed to hear it. thanks!
Thank You so much...!
Thanks for this
Thank you ❤
Thank you erik :)
Oh my 💖 first 🥇 comment..
so truuuuuuuuue
Having been born into a family of 8 with more than half intuitives (N), I have an INFP sister and a ISFP brother and both r extremely introverted but there is a distinct difference bet the two but their values r withdrawn and secretive. Their communication sucks until they do soemthing about it.
Seems to me that the overly self centered egocentric side of the INFP can also be at times negative, even egotistical and possibly our greatest weakness or blind spot. Like two sides of the same coin, strong sense of self and convictions which is good but a shadow side of being a potential ego maniac. Relationships and connectedness with others help to temper that in my opinion. lol, I'm no typologist just looking at my own growth patterns and thinking about my observations and interaction with INFP friends.
Who is "we" and whats "society" ? People ?
💯
🙋♂️ 👻