I am a cis straight girl and I found it absolutely bewildering that someone can just effortlessly shapeshift and look amazing both masculine and feminine
I've discovered it with myself! I discovered that I'm androgynous and somehow i can easily look like a boy when i do a ponytail / tie my hair :sob: Tho it's pretty difficulting to say it to people, since most of them say stuff like "that doesn't exist!" or "there's only two true genders."
Folks out here being able to shapeshift, meanwhile Ah just look like an eternal twink it seems :/ Ah mean, nothing wrong with twinks, it's just don't wanna always look like one
Yeah I'm an older woman and I find you absolutely delectable either way. You're the final form of one of those reversible octopus plushies and I'm here for every second of it. ❤❤❤
As a GNC/fluidly presenting dude intersex dude that collects those reversible plushies (I think you are referring to Flippies? Although there are a few more anatomically accurate shaped brands too and I have a few of those too, so cute 🥰) I greatly respect this comment. This creator is their final form makes total sense, I have been trying to tell people those plushies are lovely non binary aliens for years 🖤
The "funnier as a guy" thing is so real. More than half the time when I make some kind of funny comment/post online (on platforms where my username is just generic/anonymous), people in the replies think I'm a guy (calling me "my guy" or "king" and stuff) but I'm actually (at least currently) a cis woman.
I once tested the "funnier when a man" is unfortunately true I was in class, and I said a joke. Nobody laughed tho and js thought it was cringe. I had a guy friend say the same thing in the next class, and everyone thought he was hilarious 🤷♀️
@@ornithowlogistit could be, it as an afab myself, I’ve said a joke for people to ignore it, and then a few minutes later, a guy says it and people react.
In my experience, people tend to believe more promptly that women are dumb, therefore also incapable of irony. The amount of times I've had ppl, especially older folks, scold me for something that was clearly a joke is just plain annoying
THIS 😭 i come across as super androgynous all the time (I am just a guy) and so many times people approach me using the "I am talking to a girl" social code (women being very nice and friendly, guys flirting or talking over) and its interesting at best and off-putting at worst to see how the way they interact with me changes if they figure out I am not in fact the woman they thought I was
Same 💀 guys get so weird about it and women are generally nice about it unless they have some opinion about queer people that makes them clam up. It’s really weird having a very customer heavy position cause you have one person treating you like a guy one moment and the next person treating you like you have no idea what you’re talking about. And it’s so scary trying to figure out what they’ll do if you do the “wrong thing” that suddenly means you don’t pass as whatever they thought you were 🗿
But being bisexual has to do with sex not gender. I think ppl are attracted to the sex or their potential partners more than anything else at the end of the day, and the ppl who are more attracted to presentation are the minority.
Something I've noticed from anecdotes like this where people experience both is that it really does seem that femme presenting people feel safer with other femme people and masc presenting people feel safer with other masc presenting people, which makes sense. There's a sense of understanding and closeness that's oddly immediately established, albeit in different ways, where femme people are more compassionate and masc people feel more free to be honest. Whereas I notice when there's crossover, where femme people feel intimidated and uncomfortable around masc people, masc people tend to act so superior to femme people and intentionally or not create a wall. It seems so obvious and yet its like even without misogyny it seems like masc people do that shit and idk its weird and sad
That's something I really like about having mostly trans friends. We're all coming from a place of "I understand the culture of my agab but I'm not really a part of it" so we tend to talk a lot more openly about gendered experiences. There's no secrets being kept because of some "bro code" or whatever the woman equivalent of that would be.
Or, hear me out..... Its just that if one person likes another person they feep safer with them than with someone they dont like. Whatever femme-presenting means i'm sure youre just throwing terms in there. Its seriously a simple thibg to describe
@@ToxicMothBoia good habit to get into, is when someone uses language you don’t understand, you Google it, it will make you smarter and stop you from announcing your ignorance to the world like a badge of honour
I was putting power steering fluid in my car when a guy in a suit just ran up to me asking if I needed help. I said, “no” to which he responded, “okay well I’m just gonna watch.” HE STOOD NEXT TO ME THE REST OF THE TIME! I was so uncomfortable. That is definitely not the first time some shit like that has happened to me, and I know it won’t be the last.
You need to tell guys like that specifically to get lost. You were bent over your car in a vulnerable position. Guys like serial killer Ted Bundy and even regular thieves and rapists test potential victims for compliance and lack of resistance to their aggression. Be more careful, please!
@@angel794 if it makes you feel any better I wasn’t actually bent over the car. It’s a suburban so it was too tall for me to do that. But I didn’t think about it as him looking for subservience. I’ll be on the lookout for that next time. I just thought he was doing it in a mansplaining way. Guys always approach me when I’m doing anything to my car. I get it, I’m a woman, that doesn’t mean I’m helpless around cars!
@@darthkittyous7901 Girl how did you not tell him to “fuck off or you’re calling the cops”. You could’ve ended up on the news or the back of the milk cart 😭😭 Don’t ever let a man or anyone (unless it’s a nice doggo or kitty ❤) stand that close to you!! No matter if you *think* you’re in a “safe area”!
And they think that’s what they’re supposed to do and that they’re helping. I think they probably feel good about it like they just helped a silly little women who was having car troubles
I'm gender fluid too. But not out. I dress mostly as male (despite how I'm feeling) but I'm female from birth. Mostly BC of security reasons. But I got told A LOT that I'm intimidating as a female and got treated with a kind of regard or respect when they "forget" I'm female. I got to hear a lot of disgusting confessions from men too (about SA and the like) like it's something funny.
You probably shouldn't present as a man. Men have a space where they feel safe, just like women. When a woman invades that space or vise versa, it changes the dynamic, and neither can openly express themselves. We are physically, emotionally, hormonally, socially, psychologically different. You can't change that.
Damn, noted. Thanks for sharing your experience!! I'm in the same boat too, but I'm more trans masc/masc presenting and comfortable with my birth sex. I can't dress or present how I want to be because of my living environment, etc or experience the female treatmen or live much, but I still see and weird ass shit tho in both parties.
Omg I totally noticed a lot of these too!! Ive gained a lot of weight since starting T and don't come across as a gorgeous woman anymore (I am not lamenting this or needing consoling. I am comfortable with my body, society just treats non-conventionally attractive people differently!!) But if you REALLY wanna be thrown for a loop? Try wigs! Some things I noticed are with pink hair people seem more... excited to talk to you? Dark hair makes you "intimidating" (you spotted that one!) And blonde hair? You hear a lot of, "Is it true blondes always have more fun?" And people will treat you like a ditzy idiot almost 100% of the time REGARDLESS of how correct you are about anything.
Honestly, I’m just a woman who naturally has really dark hair, and I noticed people talk to me more when I bleached my hair for a while (I had cut it to shoulder length from butt length and wanted to try out stuff before I grew it back) It’s so interesting. I had different shades of lighter hair, but never really blonde (the closest was ginger), but now that my hair is all virgin hair again, I’m barely getting spoken to compared to any of the lighter shades.
the differences between how people treat others based on different aspects of appearance is something i would LOVE to observe firsthand. shapeshifting would be so nice...
Can confirm the blonde experience ..Ive dyed my hair since I was 14, now i am a mother and a registered nurse.. people still treat me like I'm a teenager in any given setting
THE HAIR THING IS SO REAL I had my hair short and dyed for most of my life but last few years I let my natural blonde grow long and I feel 1) completely invisible to other queers lol and 2) way too visible to straight guys who think I’m gonna be an airhead who definitely wants to sleep with them. It’s been hella weird and lowkey disconcerting how like, vapid and surface-level people are with me now and how little they care abt actually conversing with me outside how they think I should be acting. When I had a jet black Mohawk or purple buzz cut it was either respecting my space or good vibes only. I guess I’m glad I don’t look as “scary” to people but also like idk it’d be cool to be treated like a multidimensional person without having to keep up with a dye job lol
Born blonde here and I'm grateful for that mousy drape that often happens if you cut/process your hair too much (a friend used to give me colors I wouldn't have picked, but enjoyed because it was different)... being the lighter blonde always got attention, but was coupled with a lack of respect for my intelligence and education. Personally I think dark-haired people are far more attractive, but it's just my opinion.
I'm also Gender-fluid. I've made my own tiny observations in a book I have, like for example when i'm Masc representing most people will be all friendly and guys will leave me alone, but when i'm Fem representing guys would be all rude and shii. Sooo- Edit: JUST FOUND OUT I LOOK MASC WITH MY HAIR DOWN AND FEM WITH MY HAIR UP!
Thank you for posting this, it’s super interesting and affirming to know the way I’m treated sometimes has nothing to do with who I am and everything to do with being a woman
this except it is STILL going on with my uncle 😭 every time he visits he always tries to go for hugs and usuallt i back away or say no cuz i dont like physical touch. he doesnt give me a hug afterwards. he pins me on whatever the nearest flat surface is and TICKLES ME, which is 10 X WORSE. hes even literally gone to the extent of straddling me while on the couch (which hurts cuz hes an entire grown ass man putting his body weight on a child) JUST for some physical touch. he gives off such weird vibes too
Straight up tell him he's the creepy uncle! I had to do that to my ex husband when our nieces were growing up. He started keeping his hands to himself.
That talking through you is relatable af. Sometimes, just sometimes, like when I'm working on my car and my neighbor interjects, do I wish I presented as male 😮💨
Female here. Men often can't stand seeing women do trad guy things. Makes them feel uncomfortable because they don't want to view women as equal or capable. They also get a glimpse of being dispensable & non-superior to a woman. That drives them into Mansplain Mode in order to assert dominance and superiority. Knee jerk reaction. They don't get how fkg stupid they look doing that and how annoying they are. You could be re-building your car's transmission, obviously knowing what you are doing, and some guy will come over to Mansplain how to do what you are already doing. I was taking concrete off my old stone house using a hammer with hard rubber and nylon heads on a big steel chisel. Was using that type hammer because it has flat heads to hit chisels better, absorbs some shock to save my hand, and is quieter for my neighbors. Was doing this for awhile, rubble at my feet. A village guy comes along & tells me that I should use a metal hammer. I just kept doing what I was doing. So, I get it.
Ngl, when I first heard terminology such as this, I was very against it, but as I studied sociology -which introduced and further delved into the topics, - the awareness has made me much more accepting and supportive. I only wish more people could find this awareness, for more often than not, people are simply just misunderstanding the material and are quick to dismiss. When I look back at what I was agreeing with (before full comprehension, such as assuming sex and gender or race and ethnicity meant the same thing and could be used interchangeably), the arguments and statments I agreed with were not correct afterall! If you're interested in furthering your compassion for people through knowlege - as well as benefit from social skills - I highly recommend a sociology class! ❤
How long did it take for you to get the fem/masc looks down? Im going to start trying to present more fem. Im very comfortable with my masc look, but im super intimidated by trying to look fem.
I wanna say this in a way that absolutely doesn’t sound ugly so please don’t take my text as such❤️ but it didn’t take ‘long’ per say as I get ready based off my energy. When doing my makeup, however that comes out, I’m FULLY embodying that look naturally. To put gently, it’s not anything I had to practice but rather had the confidence to fully express outwardly. So to answer your question honestly, not long. Once you feel established in who you are as a person, there is not a single thing anyone can tell you. So just make sure whatever look you’re trying to get down or achieve, their looks that represent your energy. Looks you embrace naturally 🥰❤️
@_augustskyz_ I'm not taking it in an ugly way. I'm not so much worried about other people as trying to get a realistic idea on how long it will take to get a look down. I also don't have much experience with makeup, so I know it will take me a bit to learn that skill, but I'll probably get an understanding of how I want it to look while learning the skill.
@@august_skyz”it’s not anything I had to practice but rather had the confidence to fully express outwardly”… HOLY SHIT THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE🤯 I feel the same way, I just don’t express it outwardly.
The way that you can effortlessly present as both masculine and feminine makes me TRULY envious of you! 😅 I feel like when I'm more "masculine presenting" that it makes my feminine features stand out SO MUCH MORE and whenever I'm trying to look more "feminine presenting" that my masculine features are more prominent 😭 It's like I'm gender neutral and no matter what I do it gets balanced out by my opposing features 😂😂😂
You are genuinely the first person (that I know of at least) that can pull off both looks flawlessly. I'd be non-the-wiser and thought I was talking to 2 different people😂
Sorry if this is too personal but have you got any tips to make your voice more masculine? Your videos give me a lot of gender euphoria but i was wondering if you also change your voice when you are masc presenting!
ive felt these too. ive identified as gender fluid for ten yrs now but i nearly always go out as femme, but ur inspiring me to actually be ME me out there. love this content ❤
As a cis woman I have made these observations from both ends as well you can get these perspectives just by having conversations and asking questions 😊 and it’s screwed up but we also have to remember sometimes we do these subconscious approaches without realizing we are just conditioned by social norms and regular interactions. I have accepted that people will stare at me when I am more feminine presenting and I blend in more when I am wearing leggings a tshirt and effortless hair also respected more when I am less feminine in my clothes. When i dressy super girly I get free stuff all day literally. Everything on the house from men and women. I always appreciate men who approach me when im in my effortless day but then they are thrown off when I dress up and treat me differently almost like I will leave them and like I’m being rude but I’m just as sweet and they apologize when they realize 😅 can’t win as a woman media has made feminine woman a bad thing.
So I’m a 20 year old who has a huge taste for 1950s women’s fashion so a lot of the time that’s what I’m wearing. I’ve noticed I get a lot of compliments from older people and a lot more respect from older people when dressed that way. But sometimes I get older men who try to pressure me into three 3️⃣ somes. On the other hand younger people my age either really like my outfit or giggle and laugh at me which is fine I haven’t had any actual rude intentions with people my age regarding those looks. But the ages I notice I get the most judgment is people who seem to be in their late late 20s to like what I’ve assumed is like early 40s like 28-40s range. I’ve gotten so many rude comments about how it’s weird people like me who are destroying this country etc. 😅 sir ma’am I just like this outfit.
@@LofiBakery But I thought people liked modest dressed women, I guess they only like them when they are the ones controlling?? You can’t please everyone huh?
@@lilcomment1946 unfortunately that’s how it is. That’s why I don’t judge anyone on what they are wearing as long as they are happy that’s all that matters. If nothing we wear pleases people there will always be an issue then we should just wear what we want!
That “questioning my intelligence” thing hit bc I remember I was working on an assignment in a group in math class; I was helping my classmates and we all got the same answers but only one could turn it in, and this was an exchange with one of the guys Him: I think (other male classmate) should turn it in Me: How come? Him: It just looks more right Me: How? We have the same answer Him: Idk yours is neater but his looks more right I turned mine in anyway and we got a 100 🥴🥴🥴🥴 loved it there (for the most part) but I swear 2 years with ppl at that high school have severely damaged my confidence in my intelligence when it comes to academics, esp stem 😭😭😭
As someone who is younger and still lives with their parents, I get to express my gender fluidity in clothing and style to an extent. I mean, I would rather be able to express it the way I can now then be shoved into dresses at every school dance, but I wish I could embody my gender expression more and at your capacity. I LOVE your masc and fem looks, and they're are what I'd LOVE to be, so seeing you by chance on my feed has changed my life ❤ Thank yoiu so much!
i'm not genderfluid but i'm very androgynous and scenemo, and i've noticed that when i dress more masc old women like it a lot??? like seriously, it's always the nicest old ladies ever, but when i'm dressing up more fem i always get very judgemental stares even tho the only changes are usually that i wear a bit of eyeliner and shorts + tights instead of pants. it's super weird how just a few changes make people get so much more judgy towards some rando
I typically present fem and every single time I’ve asked my friends what their first impression of me was, they all said I looked like I was ready to kill somebody. 😭
I literally thank you so much for juat posting content like this. I've been feeling both fem and masc my entire life, but only have been "rewarded" for being feminine - besides my dad is rather autoritarian and likes to keep me in check, so I was never able to explore that side of me till I moved out a few months ago - . I'd been feeling like trying masc clothing for a while and have been doing so rather discreetly, but since watching your content I began studying how you contoured your face and what outfits you styled to look more masc. Yesterday was my first day openly stating my gender fluidity to friends while wearing masc clothes and makeup and I was absolutely inspired by you and your content to live my life the way it's intended: happily. Thank you so much, keep it up! Love from Argentina! 💕🌸💕🌸
When I started at my new job (male dominanted) I noticed most of the coworkers tend to talk more to the male who started at the same time as me, maintaining more eye contact completely disregarding me for the most part
I'm non-binary, but I notice that when I dress more masc I don't attract people, but when I look more fem I have people asking me out. (And I reject them because I'm not going to explain I'm not actually a woman to strangers.)
I'm not gender fluid, however, when I have my hair in a cap and a mask on I look like a straight up dude. I've noticed all of these as well. Another one is when walking alone at night. Whenever I wear my cap and mask no one has ever followed me but I've been followed 6 times as far as I know when I dress normally.
This is so interesting😂 I once entirely masculine and the attention thing is crazy I felt like I could do anything I wanted and no one even cared. When fem presenting I feel like everything I do is carefully observed.
As someone who is also genderfluid, I hate that I can't physically pull off both extremes (when it comes to presentation) as well as you can. I always look fem no matter what I do to make myself appear masc
I've noticed some of these but I'm tall and apparently look mad when I'm not paying attention to my expressions so generally dudes keep their distance. I work construction so my hard stare when someone's doing something stupid like following me has been perfected. Most dudes are cool though as long as you don't act interested in them, I've noticed if I act like I'm attracted to dudes suddenly they act weird.
For the people approaching you more while masc i have one thing to say from a traumatized trans teen: WOMAN ARE SCARY AND PRETTY, I CAN'T DO IT MAN, I'LL CRY
I wanted to know, has it ever happened that someone was talking trash about your masc presentation to ur fem presentation (or fem presentation to your masc presentation)without knowing youre the same person?
As an afab enby that wants your masc look- damn- I get what you mean. I wanna wear more fem clothing, but want to do it via binding and eventually with top surgery, because I love both looks, though prefer short hair lol
I like trying to see what the differences are in stuff like this. I don't pass for any kind of masc no matter how I dress/do or don't do makeup sadly. Definitely a notable difference in treatment if I dress to different social classes. Autism makes guy groups easier for me to navigate, as they're usually blatant enough for even me to recognize alterior motives and out weird them or leave. I haven't figured out what masc clothes look like on me because I'm too curvy and mostly don't wear super baggy clothes because I trip on them or get them caught in everything 😂
Idk if you would consider me older, I’m 34, but when masc presenting you look very approachable and friendly. I’d have no issue coming up to you to ask you for help reaching things on the top shelves if my husband wasn’t with me lol
I just saw you randomly while scrolling and had to stop to say you are positively stunning and have greatly inspired me to put more effort into defining my masc and fem looks ❤
I'll be honest although im not gender fluid or trans i was born a female and am still a female ive been treated like crap by women and treated like an object by men so if you know these friendly womens plz send them my way its hard where i live to find someone that wont belittle you or ghost you as a friend fast 😩
I'm trans and I definitely notice people being waaaay nicer to me now that am presenting and look fem. Like, in general, its crazy. Went from invisible to being noticed and complimented all the time
lmao these are all things I've noticed too as a genderfluid person. My friend's ex husband actually thought my friend and I were getting together after her divorce because I apparently always give off "masc" or just "intimidating" energy. My friend is 100% straight. This wasn't even the first time someone's boyfriend or husband has felt intimidated by me. I just take it as a compliment now. 😂
man... I think people might interact more with you when you look masc because they just think you're hot 😂 I mean I know I would want to talk to you, if I see an attractive guy I just want to talk, idk lmao
As some one who loves playing with masc/femme presentation myself, can we pls have a chat on how u pull off both so effortlessly 🥺 like when I’m dressing masc I still have a girls face 🥲
I’m so confused, I’m curious - when you say presenting as masculine or feminine are you saying you present yourself as a boy one day and a girl the other day or as a masculine woman and a feminine woman? I genuinely am just wondering how this works
They make themselves look more like a boy or girl depending on which gender they feel that day! So if they feel like a guy, they’ll dress as a guy, and vice versa :)
Masc- boyish Fem-girlish Boys can look feminine if they want Girls can look masculine if they want Close are for everyone don’t let society dictate what you can and can’t wear *because of your sex(gender)* break the patriarchy!!!!!!!!!!
Omg I’m cis but I recently noticed the way interact with fem presenting people is way different than masc presenting people. Like I realized I am way more likely to talk to, compliment, help (with like emotional turmoil and stuff) fem presenting strangers, and I wondering have you noticed something similar from your dual perspective?
I am a cis straight girl and I found it absolutely bewildering that someone can just effortlessly shapeshift and look amazing both masculine and feminine
Same! It's like "I don't understand how they are doing that, but I am enthralled!"
@@forensicgirl me to and but im also genderfluid TnT ,
I've discovered it with myself! I discovered that I'm androgynous and somehow i can easily look like a boy when i do a ponytail / tie my hair :sob: Tho it's pretty difficulting to say it to people, since most of them say stuff like "that doesn't exist!" or "there's only two true genders."
Folks out here being able to shapeshift, meanwhile Ah just look like an eternal twink it seems :/ Ah mean, nothing wrong with twinks, it's just don't wanna always look like one
she (i think) does not look amazing compared to people who look like the sex they are.
My bi self has found my true “choose your fighter”
REAL😭
Fer real?! If my partner could just flip a switch I'd die from snu snu
Yeah I'm an older woman and I find you absolutely delectable either way. You're the final form of one of those reversible octopus plushies and I'm here for every second of it. ❤❤❤
OCTPUS PLUSHIES that's such a cute comparison😭
OHHHH YEA!!
I LOVE YOU😭😭😭
I wanna be described as delectable 😢❤
As a GNC/fluidly presenting dude intersex dude that collects those reversible plushies (I think you are referring to Flippies? Although there are a few more anatomically accurate shaped brands too and I have a few of those too, so cute 🥰) I greatly respect this comment. This creator is their final form makes total sense, I have been trying to tell people those plushies are lovely non binary aliens for years 🖤
The "funnier as a guy" thing is so real. More than half the time when I make some kind of funny comment/post online (on platforms where my username is just generic/anonymous), people in the replies think I'm a guy (calling me "my guy" or "king" and stuff) but I'm actually (at least currently) a cis woman.
Yeah isn’t it weird how people consider the default gender as male 😭 I never noticed this until reading this comment
yeaa I noticed that as well its so weird
Bro it's hylarious that you are trying to pass as a woman to make sexist jokes, you are a King! 😂😂😂
Ok the "(at least currently)" is iconic lmao
@@tirionpendragonso based. But also kinda dumb because we all know that women don’t exist on the internet
I once tested the "funnier when a man" is unfortunately true
I was in class, and I said a joke. Nobody laughed tho and js thought it was cringe. I had a guy friend say the same thing in the next class, and everyone thought he was hilarious 🤷♀️
also could’ve just been the crowds
@@ornithowlogistit could be, it as an afab myself, I’ve said a joke for people to ignore it, and then a few minutes later, a guy says it and people react.
im thinking that women might just be more clever and funnier, but people just find things more funny when men say it ☹️
I have had this experience too
In my experience, people tend to believe more promptly that women are dumb, therefore also incapable of irony. The amount of times I've had ppl, especially older folks, scold me for something that was clearly a joke is just plain annoying
My bisexuality can’t handle this
SAMEE KFJSKDHDKS
🤝
SAME 😭😭😭
same.... and i am not even sure if i am bi, but feels something for both masc and fem... damn.... so attractive..... uf
We're the ones most equipped yet still going crazy !
THIS 😭 i come across as super androgynous all the time (I am just a guy) and so many times people approach me using the "I am talking to a girl" social code (women being very nice and friendly, guys flirting or talking over) and its interesting at best and off-putting at worst to see how the way they interact with me changes if they figure out I am not in fact the woman they thought I was
Same 💀 guys get so weird about it and women are generally nice about it unless they have some opinion about queer people that makes them clam up. It’s really weird having a very customer heavy position cause you have one person treating you like a guy one moment and the next person treating you like you have no idea what you’re talking about. And it’s so scary trying to figure out what they’ll do if you do the “wrong thing” that suddenly means you don’t pass as whatever they thought you were 🗿
I think I would be more androgynous without my chest...? Maybe, idek. I'm nonbinary though.
@@stillnotmynametry overalls!! those work p well for me when a lot of other stuff doesn’t
@@blueberryjackson7539 🤔I shall try that
I'm a woman who certainly presents nonbinary. Those are always interesting conversations 😂
I sometimes think about how genderfluid person is basically a bisexual's dream partner...best of both worlds...
YES!
I'm bi and I approve this message LOL 😂
@@erikaballard5224 oh honey me too
But being bisexual has to do with sex not gender. I think ppl are attracted to the sex or their potential partners more than anything else at the end of the day, and the ppl who are more attracted to presentation are the minority.
@@rattgod I like both in appearance and parts
Something I've noticed from anecdotes like this where people experience both is that it really does seem that femme presenting people feel safer with other femme people and masc presenting people feel safer with other masc presenting people, which makes sense. There's a sense of understanding and closeness that's oddly immediately established, albeit in different ways, where femme people are more compassionate and masc people feel more free to be honest. Whereas I notice when there's crossover, where femme people feel intimidated and uncomfortable around masc people, masc people tend to act so superior to femme people and intentionally or not create a wall. It seems so obvious and yet its like even without misogyny it seems like masc people do that shit and idk its weird and sad
That's something I really like about having mostly trans friends. We're all coming from a place of "I understand the culture of my agab but I'm not really a part of it" so we tend to talk a lot more openly about gendered experiences. There's no secrets being kept because of some "bro code" or whatever the woman equivalent of that would be.
Or, hear me out.....
Its just that if one person likes another person they feep safer with them than with someone they dont like.
Whatever femme-presenting means i'm sure youre just throwing terms in there.
Its seriously a simple thibg to describe
@@ToxicMothBoia good habit to get into, is when someone uses language you don’t understand, you Google it, it will make you smarter and stop you from announcing your ignorance to the world like a badge of honour
I was putting power steering fluid in my car when a guy in a suit just ran up to me asking if I needed help. I said, “no” to which he responded, “okay well I’m just gonna watch.” HE STOOD NEXT TO ME THE REST OF THE TIME! I was so uncomfortable. That is definitely not the first time some shit like that has happened to me, and I know it won’t be the last.
You need to tell guys like that specifically to get lost. You were bent over your car in a vulnerable position. Guys like serial killer Ted Bundy and even regular thieves and rapists test potential victims for compliance and lack of resistance to their aggression. Be more careful, please!
Ewww, okay well tell him to do something better with his life next time girl, do NOT let those types of men get comfortable smh.
@@angel794 if it makes you feel any better I wasn’t actually bent over the car. It’s a suburban so it was too tall for me to do that. But I didn’t think about it as him looking for subservience. I’ll be on the lookout for that next time. I just thought he was doing it in a mansplaining way. Guys always approach me when I’m doing anything to my car. I get it, I’m a woman, that doesn’t mean I’m helpless around cars!
@@darthkittyous7901
Girl how did you not tell him to “fuck off or you’re calling the cops”. You could’ve ended up on the news or the back of the milk cart 😭😭
Don’t ever let a man or anyone (unless it’s a nice doggo or kitty ❤) stand that close to you!! No matter if you *think* you’re in a “safe area”!
And they think that’s what they’re supposed to do and that they’re helping. I think they probably feel good about it like they just helped a silly little women who was having car troubles
As a woman, it always drove me NUTS that my ex husband would ignore anything I said unless a man repeated it to him. Grrrrrr!!! 😡😡
I'm glad he's your EX husband, he doesn't sound too nice...
I'm gender fluid too. But not out. I dress mostly as male (despite how I'm feeling) but I'm female from birth. Mostly BC of security reasons. But I got told A LOT that I'm intimidating as a female and got treated with a kind of regard or respect when they "forget" I'm female. I got to hear a lot of disgusting confessions from men too (about SA and the like) like it's something funny.
Oh god same like bro... Ew
That is disgusting 😕
You probably shouldn't present as a man. Men have a space where they feel safe, just like women. When a woman invades that space or vise versa, it changes the dynamic, and neither can openly express themselves. We are physically, emotionally, hormonally, socially, psychologically different. You can't change that.
Damn, noted. Thanks for sharing your experience!! I'm in the same boat too, but I'm more trans masc/masc presenting and comfortable with my birth sex. I can't dress or present how I want to be because of my living environment, etc or experience the female treatmen or live much, but I still see and weird ass shit tho in both parties.
It's nice to see that there are other genderfluid people out there who aren't out yet. And those men are gross...
Omg I totally noticed a lot of these too!! Ive gained a lot of weight since starting T and don't come across as a gorgeous woman anymore (I am not lamenting this or needing consoling. I am comfortable with my body, society just treats non-conventionally attractive people differently!!) But if you REALLY wanna be thrown for a loop? Try wigs! Some things I noticed are with pink hair people seem more... excited to talk to you? Dark hair makes you "intimidating" (you spotted that one!) And blonde hair? You hear a lot of, "Is it true blondes always have more fun?" And people will treat you like a ditzy idiot almost 100% of the time REGARDLESS of how correct you are about anything.
Honestly, I’m just a woman who naturally has really dark hair, and I noticed people talk to me more when I bleached my hair for a while (I had cut it to shoulder length from butt length and wanted to try out stuff before I grew it back)
It’s so interesting. I had different shades of lighter hair, but never really blonde (the closest was ginger), but now that my hair is all virgin hair again, I’m barely getting spoken to compared to any of the lighter shades.
the differences between how people treat others based on different aspects of appearance is something i would LOVE to observe firsthand. shapeshifting would be so nice...
Can confirm the blonde experience ..Ive dyed my hair since I was 14, now i am a mother and a registered nurse.. people still treat me like I'm a teenager in any given setting
THE HAIR THING IS SO REAL I had my hair short and dyed for most of my life but last few years I let my natural blonde grow long and I feel 1) completely invisible to other queers lol and 2) way too visible to straight guys who think I’m gonna be an airhead who definitely wants to sleep with them. It’s been hella weird and lowkey disconcerting how like, vapid and surface-level people are with me now and how little they care abt actually conversing with me outside how they think I should be acting. When I had a jet black Mohawk or purple buzz cut it was either respecting my space or good vibes only. I guess I’m glad I don’t look as “scary” to people but also like idk it’d be cool to be treated like a multidimensional person without having to keep up with a dye job lol
Born blonde here and I'm grateful for that mousy drape that often happens if you cut/process your hair too much (a friend used to give me colors I wouldn't have picked, but enjoyed because it was different)... being the lighter blonde always got attention, but was coupled with a lack of respect for my intelligence and education. Personally I think dark-haired people are far more attractive, but it's just my opinion.
I'm also Gender-fluid. I've made my own tiny observations in a book I have, like for example when i'm Masc representing most people will be all friendly and guys will leave me alone, but when i'm Fem representing guys would be all rude and shii. Sooo-
Edit: JUST FOUND OUT I LOOK MASC WITH MY HAIR DOWN AND FEM WITH MY HAIR UP!
youre so gorgeous respectfully im obsessed 😭😭❤️
Respectfully same here ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I'm crying at 'no interior motives' and doing my best not to make a dirty joke.
Haha I know what you mean. At first I thought it was a mistake but now I'm sure it was intentional.
HOW DO I LOOK AS MASC AS YOU, TELL ME YOUR SECRETS! I BEG OF YOU
-trans dude
Real! I swear gender fluid ppl have magical powers
This person made a short about their makeup tricks to present more fem/masc! Good luck!
The talking to your soul is so TRUE. And the people coming up to you at random. It's wilddd
Thank you for posting this, it’s super interesting and affirming to know the way I’m treated sometimes has nothing to do with who I am and everything to do with being a woman
this except it is STILL going on with my uncle 😭 every time he visits he always tries to go for hugs and usuallt i back away or say no cuz i dont like physical touch. he doesnt give me a hug afterwards. he pins me on whatever the nearest flat surface is and TICKLES ME, which is 10 X WORSE. hes even literally gone to the extent of straddling me while on the couch (which hurts cuz hes an entire grown ass man putting his body weight on a child) JUST for some physical touch. he gives off such weird vibes too
Straight up tell him he's the creepy uncle! I had to do that to my ex husband when our nieces were growing up. He started keeping his hands to himself.
That talking through you is relatable af. Sometimes, just sometimes, like when I'm working on my car and my neighbor interjects, do I wish I presented as male 😮💨
Female here. Men often can't stand seeing women do trad guy things. Makes them feel uncomfortable because they don't want to view women as equal or capable. They also get a glimpse of being dispensable & non-superior to a woman. That drives them into Mansplain Mode in order to assert dominance and superiority. Knee jerk reaction. They don't get how fkg stupid they look doing that and how annoying they are. You could be re-building your car's transmission, obviously knowing what you are doing, and some guy will come over to Mansplain how to do what you are already doing.
I was taking concrete off my old stone house using a hammer with hard rubber and nylon heads on a big steel chisel. Was using that type hammer because it has flat heads to hit chisels better, absorbs some shock to save my hand, and is quieter for my neighbors. Was doing this for awhile, rubble at my feet. A village guy comes along & tells me that I should use a metal hammer. I just kept doing what I was doing. So, I get it.
ATE.
Ngl, when I first heard terminology such as this, I was very against it, but as I studied sociology -which introduced and further delved into the topics, - the awareness has made me much more accepting and supportive.
I only wish more people could find this awareness, for more often than not, people are simply just misunderstanding the material and are quick to dismiss.
When I look back at what I was agreeing with (before full comprehension, such as assuming sex and gender or race and ethnicity meant the same thing and could be used interchangeably), the arguments and statments I agreed with were not correct afterall!
If you're interested in furthering your compassion for people through knowlege - as well as benefit from social skills - I highly recommend a sociology class! ❤
How long did it take for you to get the fem/masc looks down?
Im going to start trying to present more fem. Im very comfortable with my masc look, but im super intimidated by trying to look fem.
🔥er
I wanna say this in a way that absolutely doesn’t sound ugly so please don’t take my text as such❤️ but it didn’t take ‘long’ per say as I get ready based off my energy. When doing my makeup, however that comes out, I’m FULLY embodying that look naturally. To put gently, it’s not anything I had to practice but rather had the confidence to fully express outwardly. So to answer your question honestly, not long. Once you feel established in who you are as a person, there is not a single thing anyone can tell you. So just make sure whatever look you’re trying to get down or achieve, their looks that represent your energy. Looks you embrace naturally 🥰❤️
@_augustskyz_ I'm not taking it in an ugly way.
I'm not so much worried about other people as trying to get a realistic idea on how long it will take to get a look down.
I also don't have much experience with makeup, so I know it will take me a bit to learn that skill, but I'll probably get an understanding of how I want it to look while learning the skill.
@@august_skyz
B
@@august_skyz”it’s not anything I had to practice but rather had the confidence to fully express outwardly”… HOLY SHIT THIS MAKES SO MUCH SENSE🤯
I feel the same way, I just don’t express it outwardly.
I’ve realized i’m more myself when feeling masc and really shy when feeling fem
Same 😕
Same here
my dream partner holy sh-
My thoughts exactly 😭😭😭😭
YES OMG i experience the same thing, ppl aproaching me more when masc!
I love when the shapeshifter royalty pops up in my feed ❤
The way that you can effortlessly present as both masculine and feminine makes me TRULY envious of you! 😅
I feel like when I'm more "masculine presenting" that it makes my feminine features stand out SO MUCH MORE and whenever I'm trying to look more "feminine presenting" that my masculine features are more prominent 😭
It's like I'm gender neutral and no matter what I do it gets balanced out by my opposing features 😂😂😂
The being spoken "at" is sooo trueee! I don't know why 😅 I wish it was different though. Spot on
You are genuinely the first person (that I know of at least) that can pull off both looks flawlessly. I'd be non-the-wiser and thought I was talking to 2 different people😂
You're so attractive ✨
i want to look like you
Sorry if this is too personal but have you got any tips to make your voice more masculine? Your videos give me a lot of gender euphoria but i was wondering if you also change your voice when you are masc presenting!
“Interior motives” do you happen to mean ulterior motives?
Also you look great 👍🏻
I wish to shape shift like you (you are so cool)
ive felt these too. ive identified as gender fluid for ten yrs now but i nearly always go out as femme, but ur inspiring me to actually be ME me out there. love this content ❤
DUDE, How did you change your jaw line and cherks at will????! I WANT THAT
makeup is an amazing tool
As a cis woman I have made these observations from both ends as well you can get these perspectives just by having conversations and asking questions 😊 and it’s screwed up but we also have to remember sometimes we do these subconscious approaches without realizing we are just conditioned by social norms and regular interactions. I have accepted that people will stare at me when I am more feminine presenting and I blend in more when I am wearing leggings a tshirt and effortless hair also respected more when I am less feminine in my clothes. When i dressy super girly I get free stuff all day literally. Everything on the house from men and women. I always appreciate men who approach me when im in my effortless day but then they are thrown off when I dress up and treat me differently almost like I will leave them and like I’m being rude but I’m just as sweet and they apologize when they realize 😅 can’t win as a woman media has made feminine woman a bad thing.
woah, fascinating observations 😮🤔
So I’m a 20 year old who has a huge taste for 1950s women’s fashion so a lot of the time that’s what I’m wearing. I’ve noticed I get a lot of compliments from older people and a lot more respect from older people when dressed that way. But sometimes I get older men who try to pressure me into three 3️⃣ somes.
On the other hand younger people my age either really like my outfit or giggle and laugh at me which is fine I haven’t had any actual rude intentions with people my age regarding those looks. But the ages I notice I get the most judgment is people who seem to be in their late late 20s to like what I’ve assumed is like early 40s like 28-40s range. I’ve gotten so many rude comments about how it’s weird people like me who are destroying this country etc. 😅 sir ma’am I just like this outfit.
@@LofiBakery
But I thought people liked modest dressed women, I guess they only like them when they are the ones controlling??
You can’t please everyone huh?
@@lilcomment1946 unfortunately that’s how it is. That’s why I don’t judge anyone on what they are wearing as long as they are happy that’s all that matters. If nothing we wear pleases people there will always be an issue then we should just wear what we want!
That “questioning my intelligence” thing hit bc I remember I was working on an assignment in a group in math class; I was helping my classmates and we all got the same answers but only one could turn it in, and this was an exchange with one of the guys
Him: I think (other male classmate) should turn it in
Me: How come?
Him: It just looks more right
Me: How? We have the same answer
Him: Idk yours is neater but his looks more right
I turned mine in anyway and we got a 100 🥴🥴🥴🥴 loved it there (for the most part) but I swear 2 years with ppl at that high school have severely damaged my confidence in my intelligence when it comes to academics, esp stem 😭😭😭
As someone who is younger and still lives with their parents, I get to express my gender fluidity in clothing and style to an extent. I mean, I would rather be able to express it the way I can now then be shoved into dresses at every school dance, but I wish I could embody my gender expression more and at your capacity. I LOVE your masc and fem looks, and they're are what I'd LOVE to be, so seeing you by chance on my feed has changed my life ❤ Thank yoiu so much!
i'm not genderfluid but i'm very androgynous and scenemo, and i've noticed that when i dress more masc old women like it a lot??? like seriously, it's always the nicest old ladies ever, but when i'm dressing up more fem i always get very judgemental stares even tho the only changes are usually that i wear a bit of eyeliner and shorts + tights instead of pants. it's super weird how just a few changes make people get so much more judgy towards some rando
this is genuinely so fascinating, thank u for posting this.
YOUR SHOULDERS???????? OMG???? How can one human be this freaking attractive?
Me who finds everybody has an ulterior motive (I'm paranoid)
I’m genderfluid and I just got to ask, do you have different voices? 😅 I have a far range but masc voices are so much harder to me
I typically present fem and every single time I’ve asked my friends what their first impression of me was, they all said I looked like I was ready to kill somebody. 😭
My bisexuality is screaming "I wanna date you" rn
I’ve never in my life seen someone so perfect presenting either gender. You are absolutely the definition of gender fluid!
I literally thank you so much for juat posting content like this. I've been feeling both fem and masc my entire life, but only have been "rewarded" for being feminine - besides my dad is rather autoritarian and likes to keep me in check, so I was never able to explore that side of me till I moved out a few months ago - . I'd been feeling like trying masc clothing for a while and have been doing so rather discreetly, but since watching your content I began studying how you contoured your face and what outfits you styled to look more masc. Yesterday was my first day openly stating my gender fluidity to friends while wearing masc clothes and makeup and I was absolutely inspired by you and your content to live my life the way it's intended: happily. Thank you so much, keep it up! Love from Argentina! 💕🌸💕🌸
I would love to be your friend, not for any one reason but your just very chill
The pansexual in me is intrigued, but the genderfluid in me is feeling seen ❤
When I started at my new job (male dominanted) I noticed most of the coworkers tend to talk more to the male who started at the same time as me, maintaining more eye contact completely disregarding me for the most part
The most beautiful person in either/any gender, seriously
I'm non-binary, but I notice that when I dress more masc I don't attract people, but when I look more fem I have people asking me out.
(And I reject them because I'm not going to explain I'm not actually a woman to strangers.)
I think trans and genderfluid people are so valuable for being able to point out gendered societal bullshit like this
Interior motive has me 😂
Y'know, it kinda broke my heart to see first-hand how much further away kids stay from a strange man than a strange woman.
I'm not gender fluid, however, when I have my hair in a cap and a mask on I look like a straight up dude. I've noticed all of these as well. Another one is when walking alone at night. Whenever I wear my cap and mask no one has ever followed me but I've been followed 6 times as far as I know when I dress normally.
Also yes I know how scaty it is that I have to put "as far as I know" for the amount of times I've been followed
Bro is so majestic
i wish to be granted this superpower
You look insanely amazing one way or another holy- HOW DO I BECOME LIKE YOU OH POWERFUL SHAPE SHIFTER?? 🙏
YOURE SO GORGEOUS LIKE NO JOKE- OMG
This is so interesting to hear about, it must be so weird to experience in real time
I love how they are so confident, it kinda makes me wanna be more confident
how do you do your mustacheeee it looks so natural and i’m trying to present more masc
They use mascara, if I can find the video I'll link it :)
ua-cam.com/users/shorts-YJ5ssGor9c?si=bDNgMUgWukLF_PBN
Ive never heard more truer words than, “Our bodies are made to do it, but it’s not made to do it comfortably.”
My goal in life is to look just as cool as you
Ive never seen someone so fluid in gender❤
ULTERIOR MOTIVES MENTIONED 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥🔥
My pan self is loving your fluidity and the points you're making are just adding to that ✨ 10/10 ✨ content
So stereotypical gendered clothes literally change your gender? This is mind-blowing.
This is so interesting😂 I once entirely masculine and the attention thing is crazy I felt like I could do anything I wanted and no one even cared. When fem presenting I feel like everything I do is carefully observed.
Can you hand me the button you use to change from male to female? I need that please...
Wow. This is fascinating. Not many people get to experience both!!
As someone who is also genderfluid, I hate that I can't physically pull off both extremes (when it comes to presentation) as well as you can. I always look fem no matter what I do to make myself appear masc
Same🫠 I kind of hate seeing people achieving something that I can only dream of but I also can't stop so idk
Yo that masc presentation making me feel things 🥴
I've noticed some of these but I'm tall and apparently look mad when I'm not paying attention to my expressions so generally dudes keep their distance.
I work construction so my hard stare when someone's doing something stupid like following me has been perfected.
Most dudes are cool though as long as you don't act interested in them, I've noticed if I act like I'm attracted to dudes suddenly they act weird.
For the people approaching you more while masc i have one thing to say from a traumatized trans teen: WOMAN ARE SCARY AND PRETTY, I CAN'T DO IT MAN, I'LL CRY
Giiirrrrllll you are one gorgeous guy
I wish I could pass as androgynous 😭😭
As a baby gender fluid, you're goals
Haha, this is so cool.
I wanted to know, has it ever happened that someone was talking trash about your masc presentation to ur fem presentation (or fem presentation to your masc presentation)without knowing youre the same person?
As an afab enby that wants your masc look- damn- I get what you mean.
I wanna wear more fem clothing, but want to do it via binding and eventually with top surgery, because I love both looks, though prefer short hair lol
I like trying to see what the differences are in stuff like this.
I don't pass for any kind of masc no matter how I dress/do or don't do makeup sadly.
Definitely a notable difference in treatment if I dress to different social classes.
Autism makes guy groups easier for me to navigate, as they're usually blatant enough for even me to recognize alterior motives and out weird them or leave.
I haven't figured out what masc clothes look like on me because I'm too curvy and mostly don't wear super baggy clothes because I trip on them or get them caught in everything 😂
i'm a cis person but... *ALL GENDERS SHOULD BE TREATED THE SAME!!!!!*
My dude. You casually just made me question my standing....😂 ty for the new experience and bless your gorgeous self!
Idk if you would consider me older, I’m 34, but when masc presenting you look very approachable and friendly. I’d have no issue coming up to you to ask you for help reaching things on the top shelves if my husband wasn’t with me lol
I just saw you randomly while scrolling and had to stop to say you are positively stunning and have greatly inspired me to put more effort into defining my masc and fem looks ❤
I'll be honest although im not gender fluid or trans i was born a female and am still a female ive been treated like crap by women and treated like an object by men so if you know these friendly womens plz send them my way its hard where i live to find someone that wont belittle you or ghost you as a friend fast 😩
I'm trans and I definitely notice people being waaaay nicer to me now that am presenting and look fem.
Like, in general, its crazy. Went from invisible to being noticed and complimented all the time
lmao these are all things I've noticed too as a genderfluid person. My friend's ex husband actually thought my friend and I were getting together after her divorce because I apparently always give off "masc" or just "intimidating" energy. My friend is 100% straight. This wasn't even the first time someone's boyfriend or husband has felt intimidated by me. I just take it as a compliment now. 😂
man... I think people might interact more with you when you look masc because they just think you're hot 😂 I mean I know I would want to talk to you, if I see an attractive guy I just want to talk, idk lmao
As some one who loves playing with masc/femme presentation myself, can we pls have a chat on how u pull off both so effortlessly 🥺 like when I’m dressing masc I still have a girls face 🥲
FUNNIER WHEN MASC IS SO TRUE HELP😭
I’m so confused, I’m curious - when you say presenting as masculine or feminine are you saying you present yourself as a boy one day and a girl the other day or as a masculine woman and a feminine woman? I genuinely am just wondering how this works
They make themselves look more like a boy or girl depending on which gender they feel that day! So if they feel like a guy, they’ll dress as a guy, and vice versa :)
Masc- boyish
Fem-girlish
Boys can look feminine if they want
Girls can look masculine if they want
Close are for everyone don’t let society dictate what you can and can’t wear *because of your sex(gender)* break the patriarchy!!!!!!!!!!
Omg I’m cis but I recently noticed the way interact with fem presenting people is way different than masc presenting people. Like I realized I am way more likely to talk to, compliment, help (with like emotional turmoil and stuff) fem presenting strangers, and I wondering have you noticed something similar from your dual perspective?
They are so ducking fine wtf but like also I want to be them???
oml i thought this was Jake Webber for a hot sec (you look amazing tho