So well done Anna! As someone who also feels held hostage by a war in my head, this was really amazing to relate to. You’re wonderful and your channel is making climbing a better space ❤
@hannahmorrisbouldering I am going through something where I also felt hostage by my own mind. I am dead set on trying to develope myself however! I just hope I can find a good strategy :)
It helps acknowledging that 99% of people out there don’t care, aren’t paying attention, and have other things on their minds. For the other 1%, if they throw any negativity your way then you know they have their own life problems and aren’t worth your energy anyways. I would also try to distance yourself from the YTer mindset in general. It won’t help.
thanks to both of you for your content! I guess it is really difficult not to care about your performance when you are doing it as your full time job. in my experience of a hobby climber it is not so stressful. if I get into my head I remind myself: 1) I'm here to have fun, if it stresses me out I have to quit (oh no no no) 2) I have to trust my own body and move in my own pace. 3) I am not a bad person if I don't send a boulder, there will be other days and other boulders. 4) even if I love climbing, the life goes on behind the gym doors. 5) trust the process = good rest, proper mindset and practice, and the progress will follow. I love climbing because you can do it with a male partner or stronger friends and still have fun together. I haven't noticed it before, but when I hear female climbers I realise, that trying to keep up with somebody else's progress, especially if they are male, is really unhelpful for us. I think we should never try to compete with each other, as long as we are not competition climbers. only then we can find joy and support in this amazing climbing community.
Thank you for this video, it had me crying in places. I am a person who will climb with anyone and everyone in the gym and is generally not affected by others being there or not, but it breaks my heart whenever someone doesn't want to join the group on the new set because they are worried about all the "good" climbers judging them. I wish there was something more I could do other than just general encouragement. I hope this video reaches and helps at least a few people get over their fears of doing the sport we all love with others.
You made me tear up both for myself and for you. I am afraid to fall off the V2's at our gym because I think the other climbers will laugh at me, which means I'm not getting any better, which makes me sad. I'm going tonight and I'm going to try and be brave and fall off something...x Your vulnerability inspires others to be brave. 😊
Being a “strong” climber is hard. Being a strong person is exponentially harder. Your videos are wonderful to watch because you are in them. In life, All you can do is your best. That’s what I see when I watch you. Keep being your beautiful self and thank you for being Anna.
As a 56 year old male, with less than a year of bouldering experience in a gym, I found this video to be very interesting and thought provoking. Good on you for sharing your thoughts and experience in coping with anxiety and negative thoughts/emotions in the climbing world. Now, if only I had your strength to hang from a bar while casually talking about my pit hairs so effortlessly..... Your videos are wonderful and have been very inspiring for me, so thank you, and keep being you.
How has it been for you - body wise - getting into bouldering in the 50s? Ive been thinking about getting into it to hopefully help with various aches. Have been to the bouldering gym once for a casual look - the jumping down is a bit of a worry lol… How long before a knee gives out 😅… I wish I’d discovered the sport existed 30 years ago 😂
Your constant messaging through the channel of being comfortable in yourself and your presentation meant the world to me as an early transition woman who was scared of going to the gym for the exact same reasons - overdevelopment of muscles, body hair concerns, boys club vibes. Seeing you doing what you do and living your life and being absolutely gorgeous and amazing doing it helped me get out of my head and enjoy climbing in a way that would have been so much harder for me otherwise. Literally 10,000 thank yous :) you and this channel are the best
Thank you for sharing this story with me!! I have had so many conversations with my trans MTF friend about this exact topic, and I literally had this in mind when I started my UA-cam. I thought, if I'm gonna put myself out there more, I HAVE to be a positive representation for ALL women. I took 2 years to gain a healthy amount of weight, start lifting, and generally to take care of myself inside and out to make sure I could represent womanhood in an honest way that makes women feel included and proud. Sending power your way 💖
The bit about secondary emotions creating a loop of negative feedback hit so good. It's easy to write off your feelings on the wall as some inherent aspect of your personality that you just have to power through when really its just your mind running wild. A little introspection in those moments can go a long way, thank you so much for a much needed reminder that I don't have to be held hostage by my thoughts.
It's tough because as a highly sensitive/emotional person, I sometimes feel it's unfair I have ALL of these overwhelming feelings, so much more often than friends and other people I meet (or so I assume). I've learned that I may have "more" emotion than a lot of people, but it's more important how I respond to those emotions rather than having them in the first place. Like you say, it helps separate "aspect of personality" (i.e. having lots of emotions) versus something you can actively work on (i.e. response to the tons of emotions). Best of luck on your journey 🙏🏽
AnnaHazelnutt personally, it helped massively once I understood that whatever I'm feeling, be it embarrassment, fear, or anything, everyone else at the gym has probably felt at one point or another or is even feeling that right now. I finally noticed that none of the other people cared about whatever someone else was doing, so they're probably not going to care about me. Positive experience is also a giant confidence boost. Even some small, friendly conversations helped me massively when trying to open up to the other people there. I found that the more open you get the easier the next step became and pretty soon you'll sit in a group random people that are projecting a level 6 that you couldn't even dream about and who cheer you on when trying your level 3 that they'd do for warm up. (Not a true story at all no no) The video is amazing so please do the world a favour and keep posting.
I'm probably not your typical content viewer, but as a 60 year old, white CIS male, yours is my favorite climbing related internet content. Everything you discussed here makes you so relatable to someone who started climbing at 50, struggles with shoulder injuries and wrist tendonitis, and stutters a bit & has (luckily pretty mild) tourettes. So it's pretty inspiring to see you acknowledge the same myriad of mental struggles of climbing I have and overcoming them. I'm still working on a lot of it, but I have a lot of climbing left in me to improve.
Excellent video. I'm 60 yrs old and only been back into climbing for 4 yrs. I used to climb pretty hard stuff when I was in my late teens and early twenties but a fatal accident stopped me in my tracks.I feel very conscious of my lack of skill now compared to all those years ago. I feel in my head that people are thinking he can't climb any more. But it's me at 60 comparing myself to me at 20 yrs old.
It's so great to hear people loving climbing throughout their lives. I know I've found my hobby and sport in climbing and now I know I can keep at it for as long as I wish.
I took a 15 break from climbing and just came back to it a few months ago, overweight and on the wrong side of 60 myself. Realizing that you are projecting your own internal battle onto others is a great first step. What works for me is a little different. About 20 years ago a fellow named Tracy Young told me he wanted to create a mountaineering team for developmentally disabled adults. We were at Tahquitz, getting snow showered off a 5.9 (Open Book?) I thought it was a great idea, so I sponsored, volunteered, etc. and The Trailblazers were born. We were only able to keep the program going for a couple of years, but they were a great experience. One participant, named Ron Holland, remains my all time climbing hero. I mean that sincerely, not in the condescending way my daughters compliment me when I huff up a gym V3. In all the ways we normally measure success - money, strength, high test scores, etc. Ron comes up short. But in all the ways that really matter - loyalty, courage, determination, Ron is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. So when I shoot off a remedial problem and start judging myself, or worrying about what other people might think, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and whisper “climb like Ron”.
4:43 one time I was complaining about how I kept falling at the same place in a problem and this guy told me that falling is what makes you stronger and I realized he’s right and that really changed my mindset about projecting
I appreciate you SO MUCH.... the past year, I've fallen more into the pressures of the rat race...wanting to be BETTER, to be more SUCCESSFUL, to be RECOGNIZED in my pursuits. There's such a pressure towards perfectionism these days, literally in EVERYTHING you're doing (career, body image/self presentation, social media goal$$, blah blah) and it takes away from the FUN OF LIFE. Going to the climbing gym is FUN and trying problems that are weird or beyond you should still be FUN. Getting trapped in the "I-should-be-better, I-should've-sent-that, my-shoulders-are-too-big, people-are-judging-me" cycle of thoughts is easy to do, but sooooo isolating, and keeping you from potentially connecting with those around you and yourself. "I-can't-make-eye-contact-with-them-because-blah-blah-blah". Really working on breaking out of these games! Who gives a fuck if you're good or bad if you're having a great time at the gym and gaining something through it. Priorities of perfectionism are twisting everything around, and I'm so refreshed and delighted to hear you speaking against it. Omg this is a long youtube comment that I am embarrassed by my sincerity of, but holy shit y'all, have I been thinking about this a lot. Thanks Anna! Keep it up! -a fellow broad shouldered, hairy armpit goofball climber
Although I don't personally experience this matter, being acquainted with individuals who share these very emotions has truly moved me on an emotional level
As someone who struggles with self confidence and a general sense of self, this really resonated with me. Your openness about your insecurities and your drive to overcome them is truly an inspiration - Thank you.
Anna, you never cease to prove yourself as a representation of the best there is in our community, and we are all truly grateful for it. Your commitment to sharing your humanity through your climbing and to remind everyone that they too are welcome into our beautiful sport is reassuring and inspiring. Keep up the amazing work, love from Portugal 🌱
Oh Anna, that was such a nice video.We never actually see these problems at others so of cause every body thinks "it's just me". That's why it is so important to talk more these challenges for your mental. Everybody has to face them (some more, some less) and it is much easier to face them knowing that overcoming your mental challenges is as hard as the moves on the wall.
You are by far one of the most relatable and welcoming climbers on UA-cam and you’ve been so amazing in your mindset and even inspire me to not care about what people think in climbing and in life 🥹🌈❤️. Keep on slaying!
I have been always horribly anxious when taking tests. The debilitating anxiety was killing me. Finally I came up with a phrase that helps me and others in similar high pressure situations: "Five minutes of shame and your experience becomes a permanent history". Everything passes. Nothing is forever. We all struggle. Good people understand it and will try to support you. Always.
I will never forget when my clinical psychology professor told us that even when we feel very watched and socially anxious, literally no one else cares about you because they are too self absorbed! I struggle with judging my own performance (and thus feeling self conscious) because of how much stronger I was in the past...I realize I have to overcome that or it takes away from the enjoyment of climbing.
Your comments about self-expectations dominating your climbing (and life) mindset ring really true for me. I've climbed for so long that I have a performance baseline, where if I can't always meet that with ease, even when I'm out of shape or haven't climbed for an extended period of time, then I'm not doing a good job, and I should be ashamed of myself. It's a hard mentality to break. Soon, I'm going to start climbing after a year-long break, and my goal is to have low expectations while not holding myself back. Thanks for sharing your story. It's always nice to not feel alone on the wall.
Fantastic video that I cannot believe I took 3 months to see!!! I relate so heavily to this, and I'm so glad there are folks in the community giving it the spotlight it deserves. Well done, and you're a true inspiration!
I am seriously going to bookmark this and play it before every crag and gym session now. I watched this for the first time after a particularly terrible kilter board session last night, I was feeling so terrible and down on myself - and it was like a virtual hug. Thank you so much for sharing and reminding all of us that it is totally ok to be human, mess up, and sometimes flail around on what we think we "should" be able to easily do.
You're such a huge inspiration to me. When you share your anxiety and fears and self-consciousness I can relate. Your words resonate with me and seeing you put your training out there in public, on camera, is so SO very impactful to me and others like me. While I may never have the confidence to go in front of a camera, your story is teaching me how to treat my time on the wall and training for my joy, for my experience. Thank you for always being kind and tenacious and giving climbers like us a voice.
This is fantastic. Not only are you discussing a really important topic, you are eloquent and thoughtful about it, and the video is exciting and interesting. This really helped me and will help so many others. Thank you for doing what you do :-)
I loved this video! You are right - no-one cares. Some people might have passing negative thoughts, but they aren't people I want to know or care about. I have found that most of the time, people are on your side. Lots of times when I am struggling on a project, people will join in and cheer you on. Most climbers are supportive and the few that aren't aren't worth taking up your head-space.
Love this, and one of the things I love about following your content is how human you are! The mental health aspect is so critical to growth as a person, outside of progression as a climber, and sometimes it's easy for me to forget to be a human first.
This video is something else. It' s so relatable I teared up. I have always been really self-conscious about my climbing and what other think of me and what I do. It got even worse when I become climbing instructor and expected of myself even more -to be at a certain level at all time. I put so much pressure on myself, it took the whole joy of climbing; it blocked me (psychologically) from finishing my projects. Finally, I decided to put away the "instructor" part for few years and just focus on climbing and re-finding my passion for it. Now I start to see that when I let go and just focus on moves (not the goal, not my fears) some weird magic happens and I finish my routes, easily; plus I enjoy the process.
I love that reframing process for you! I did a similar one from bouldering to sport/trad. Changing up disciplines and becoming a “beginner” again let me enjoy the process and bring it back with me to bouldering when I inevitably returned 🙏🏽
thank you so much for this. im a young female competition climber who has dealt with self-sabotage in... every area, but especially climbing, particularly because i can't stop comparing myself to others. i've been injured and have stopped climbing for almost nine months, but im going back tomorrow-- it was like a miracle that this video popped up today! i am going to do my best to not compare my journey to other peole's journeys, because it is my journey and my journey alone. thank you. you're an inspiration to me!
As a girl with social anxiety and depression, I can relate so bad. I've recently developed this weird habbit of climbing right under the top hold and then jumping down over and over - as if climbing it the way I did wasn't good enough or done properly. It was caused by a combination of fear of failure and pure self-sabotage. But then I watched videos of girl climbers, such as Janja, and decided to just try and see what happens. The day I made this decision, I finished several boulders that were quite difficult for me. :) And guess what, it turned out that the constant repetition of these challenging routes eventually improved my technique. The same way every person is built differently in terms of height, joints and muscles, we are different in the ways our minds work, but mindset is what matters :)
Omg I love that progression so much. Sometimes it’s hard to even see that we self sabotage ourselves until we get a broader perspective. Thanks for sharing ❤
Also guess what. I climb only caring what Anna (and girl crushers with Anna spirit) will think of me in the rare chance Anna walks into my inky dinky gym in Europe or I manage to make it to the buttermilks on day. And I really way attention to who I spend my time watching at the gym: only people whose STYLE on and off the wall I respect and admire-despite the grade. And I don’t spend my time watching anyone else. There are dissertations out there about the power and resistance of “the gaze” both our own and others’ right? ❤️❤️❤️ infinite gratitude to you
I am particularly grateful for this video. I've been going through it for a while and struggle with social anxiety and have self worth issues. This could just be a channel about climbing and I'd be diggity down and still watch every upload. This video is really special and inspiring.
Once you started talking about identifying secondary emotions this video became legendary. What good advice to help people move towards mindfulness. Such a pleasant surprise.
Spot on! Love your message and especially how you said it. I think most climbers will cheer for you if you get a route that you've struggled on. Beating your own expectations and overcoming mental blockades is awesome. If you give it your all on a V2 and finally get it that gets me as hyped as seeing someone struggling and sending a V6.
It is so nice to hear about your fears, your feelings and what is hard for you. From the videos, you always looks so brave, fighting and keep at it untill you succeed. It's amazing to see all that and it is also amazing to see about the hard part. What ever you do, I will always be so happy to watch your new adventures. And it is great that you are doing your climbing in your own way. You don't need to be validated by anyone!!! And no one has the right to validate you or not.
Wow!! Thank you so much for this video ! I didn't know I needed this but I really did. I have so much social anxiety and it always stops me from improving because I'm too scared to fail especially when people are watching. But I love climbing and I will do everything do keep going. This video gives me hope that I can change my perspective!
you made me cry by this beautiful & emotionful video. Thank you so much for sharing your insights and progress with social anxiety. You are truly inspiring Anna
Thanks Anna for being so open. A lot of your points resonated with me. I am in a completely different demographic group: men who are starting to glimpse the chasm of old age on the horizon (I'm 65) but a lot of issues for my demographic group seem similar to yours. I have gradually become self-conscious in the climbing gym in a way I wasn't before. On a scary boulder problem I realise that I really, REALLY don't want to fall off because it will make me look like a doddery old idiot who will * thinks* bounce off the mat, do several desperate steps and still fall splat on his nose. So this is really helpful. I love your videos. The colabs with Tom Randall and the Wide Boys always make me smile.
I can really relate to 1:26 "what if I actually tried my best and still sucked". This, I think, was my main limiting factor for like my ten first years of climbing... Back then, I never tried my best and also avoided onsiting (unless really easy) for fear of failing. Nowadays, I (mostly) don't fear these things and really enjoy trying hard on climbs where I estimate a 90/10 fail/success percentage. Also related. I've switched more and more over the years from absolute to relative thinking (how hard/well you try is what matters, not how well it goes)
As someone who doesn’t really fit in with gender norms, it’s hard to feel like I’m not being judged by others who climb and that I have to work harder to prove that I am worthy of being at the gym. This was so beautifully said, thank you Anna
Hi Anna, Love your content! You're so strong both on and off the wall, have great energy and are generally a big inspiration. Also f**K people that comment general hate and especially on your appearance. They really need to do some self reflection and growing. I hope you're able to give them the attention they deserve... None! Thanks again for putting yourself out there!
I started climbing about 6 months ago, as the first sport (or really physical activity at all) in my life, at 35, there hasn't really been a moment at the gym where I haven't felt self conscious; except when I'm the only one there I guess... Thanks for this video. That's all I can really think to say!
I had to leave climbing after growing up in the sport bc my anxiety started making every session just miserable. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to come back to climbing, but this video made me feel less alone, so thank you
Hey Anna, that list is bang on. I really enjoy watching your vlogs. You are a really fun, likeable climber with so much heart, so I hope this reinforces what you know to be true. Some people put up walls to avoid getting hurt, others wear masks, you are honest and welcoming.
My two cents: it is true that in most cases people care much less about us than we think. And in the climbing community, we are very lucky that this is in fact the case most times. However, there will be cases in which people will judge and reject you because of what you do, what you are or what you love. As a woman I was explicitly given the "instruciton" not to become too buffy while climbing and bouldering by a family member. Rejection can be painful. However, we can overcome this by being around people that loves us and accept us for what we truly are. The reason we are scared about people's opinion is because we give value to those. Therefore, let's learn to give value to the opinions of those people we care about the most!
@@AllegraClimbingPsychologist I was also told multiple times at the gym that it was good I was skinny and not buff like other strong girls, because they were manly and I was still pretty. This definitely f*cked me up in years to come and it took me a while to feel feminine and beautiful in my body. I still have off days but they're far and few between. Thank you for your two cents 🥰
This is the video I didn't know I needed. As someone who's been struggling to get back into climbing after injuries and other issues, this had me in tears. Thank you so much ❤
I watch a lot of bouldering content here on UA-cam. What I find most helpful, inspiring and enjoyable to watch is seeing peoples progress. Yeah it's nice and impressive when someone flashes every route - but also intimidating. It's making me feel like an amateur and pressures me into the expectation that I have to do the same, that it's normal to flash every route, every grade, and that I'm a failure if I don't do the same. But seeing people fail, assess, improve, learn and progress gives me the tools - mentally and physically - to grow and become a better climber myself. So especially as feedback to you as a content creator in the bouldering and climbing field: The best videos are the ones where you fail, where you have to overcome your own struggles and have a learning experience. I feel the same pressure of expectation and shame and fear, I understand that it's part of the process and that you can't just flick the switch an shut it off (boy would that be great sometimes). Just know it's such a gift to watch your videos and it takes so much strength to film yourself and be vulnerable publicly. Thank you so much Anna for taking the jump time and time again - it's greatly appreciated. (Same goes for other creators as well.) This video is amazing. You're doing so great. Love from Germany, Jess 🤗🌻
Hey Anna, loved the video and how you showed us some tips for being kind to ourselves! And for making this for yourself too 🙂 Thanks for being an awesome role model out there!
Thank you for your beautiful idea. I personally enjoyed climbing the most when I tackle something very uncomfortable. But usually just afterwards. While doing it - it feels so bad in so many ways.
Honesty is the best inspiration. Thank you for your enthusiasm and the inspiration you are ever so generous with! May you always try more times than you fail!
Just wanted to say I watched this before going out to my second climbing session of my adult life today. My first session (a few months ago) had been ok, but the point at which I left was when the sense of inferiority got too much and I just felt defeated. Today's session ended not when I had (after many, many falls) sent my first ever V2, but when my hands and arms just had no more to give! I'm still thinking about the last problem I was trying for. I tried hard, I fell a lot, I rested and tried again, and I talked to strangers. I credit that change of mindset to the failure-positive approach of UA-cam climbers like you, Louis Parkinson and others - so thank you!
The first time I saw you at the climbing gym, I was so excited. But, last week when I saw you climbing with a group of other really amazing female climbers, I felt the need to hide (in a sense). I definitely had the, "I'm only a V0 climber and they're all so much better than me" mindset. I also have fear of climbing in front of big groups of people especially when they're better. I didn't say hi to any of you and I didn't ask to try the V0 climb. Instead, I went around the corner to a different wall where no one was. No matter what, I love climbing and had a great session but, the fear of what other people would think of me definitely changed my course of action. Thank you for sharing this video 🩷
Oh no! I'm sorry if I at all came across as unwelcoming. I think for everyone, it's easier to climb with people trying the same climbs as you because you get to share beta and play on the same holds together. But I'm happy to climb with people climbing all levels and hope that if you see me in the future you can know with certainty that it's okay to say hi :) Especially if you come up and treat me like a normal human being (some people lately have been starting wild conversations with me or demanding my attention in ways that feel dehumanizing...)
The reason I watch your videos (and have now subbed) is because you always seem to find the fun in a situation, even if it's some outrageously scary trad thing. "The best climber is the one having the most fun" - Alex Lowe.
Well said Ana, I have been struggling through this for about 3 years. I have been fighting so hard in my head that is almost as painful as the physical pain I feel after a hard session at the gym. I got to overcome several of my struggles but I guess not enough yet to fully permit myself ascend. I guess one of the hardest things for me is to find myself belonging to this or that group, even though I know this is something that shouldn't be in my way. Unfortunatly, I fell that I need to be good to be going there or there, otherwise, if you don't climb this or that you are just left behind or have to count on specific chill days where people are not that focused on projects on the rocks. In the gym I can get myself through that now, but outside is harder. And when I go outside, if feels like day one again. It is a nice journey, but a really resilient one and is always nice to hear from female climbers, I feel really related to what you used to feel and this gives me strength. Thank you for being you, and sharing both success and failure with us. You are really inspiring. KMON.
This video is so refreshing, honestly your presence, your videos and your mindset are really inspiring and very much needed in this word !! I just wanna say thank you !
Anna. Don't put yourself down!!! I love watching your videos and I love your wacky sense of humour. When I was climbing in the 60's (yes 60 years ago!) there were no gyms, you got out there on the rock and climbed, or fell off, or both. I had a pair of Hawkins boots and on the rock I used an Austrian lightweight boot called a Kletterschue (or something like that) At about that time the first "sticky" boots came out, I think they were called "Masters". We used to wear old clothes to climb and walking in the rain we had our Peter Storm cagoule. Nobody bothered about how you looked but if you topped out on a good route you might get a round of applause from your mates at the bottom. I always told my son Be your own Man, but in your case Be your own Woman. Don't change anything and sod the the rest.💖
Thank you so much for this video, I really needed this right now. I am autistic and suffer from really bad social anxiety. A few months ago, my partner (re-)discovered his love for bouldering and was really excited to introduce me to it. But my fears prevent me from trying new things, sadly they are very stubborn and I refused to come to the gym. But I know how much it means to him and I am also at a point where I can’t let my life be controlled by my fear anymore. So we had a little climbing date and I really enjoyed it. My boyfriend did some research to find the calmest gym and when there are the least people, he did everything to make the day as positive of an experience as possible and I am really thankfull. But I am also really proud of my self for overcoming my fear and taking a little step in the right direction! This video came at the exact right time, a lot of your experiences resonate with me and it really moved me. After watching some of your videos I am really looking forward to my next time climbing!
Wow what a lovely thing to do for you/ and you for him! I’m so glad you enjoyed the climbing and can hopefully see that you’re supported in joining the community even if it doesn’t always feel that way.
Absolutely wonderful video. Thank-you for sharing! My take on #4 is that my failure gives others permission to fail. My being myself gives others permission to be themselves. Anna you are truly rocking it and I'm so pleased you addressed these issues that affect all of us, not just climbers! ❤❤ Oh, and I LOVE the fact you shaved one armpit so EVERYONE would have a problem. That's punk-ass in-your-face-ness right there!
Under the facade of ego and destructive thinking we are all naturally confident beings it's the ego that keeps us in this self contained bubble of suffering. As a climber myself I ask myself who am I performing for, complete with your own potential , focus on being in the present moment. I think you are an inspiration to many Anna 💛
Thank you for your time in making this content, Ive been climbing for forty years now and in all that time I have constantly lived with social anxiety and faced the fear in my head. When I started climbing there were no indoor climbing walls anywhere near me so I had the chance to escape to small crags and quarries to find solitude and be by myself. As the years rolled by and indoor climbing walls popped up I had a real dichotomy of knowing that safe indoor specific training especially during winter would help push my climbing grades and make me stronger coupled with how on earth could I walk in the door and be in an area surrounded by people most of them younger than me who looked great and were climbing really well, I really struggled. I had many days and nights of driving to the wall and sitting outside in the van for a couple of hours at times scared to leave that safe space and enter inside gripped by fear having made the experience into an insurmountable barrier that I thought no one else would feel or understand, how wrong I was. As the years rolled by I gradually came to realise that most climbers and people in general all have some sort of fear or anxiety and most can switch off and hide or mask it well enough to let them carry on with their everyday life, we might not see it but its real and what changed for me was making a promise to myself that when I walked into the wall I would have to talk to two people on every occasion before I would start climbing, a kind of forced therapy which wasnt easy and it came with lots of awkward staring at feet and mumbling and scratching of heads but through time I came to see that the majority of climbers just didnt care, they were so focussed on themselves and making the most of their short time at the wall that they were not interested in me or my climbing or what grades I was pushing or what colour my Troll Omni pants were this week, it just didnt matter, it never had but I just couldnt see it. Talking to climbers for me and opening up about my fears is the thing that has seen my biggest progression and made me a better climber, Iam coming to the end of my climbing times now but for those new to the scene or for the young folks who are gripped by fear when walking into the wall then all I would say is talk, be honest and talk to those around you and you will be surprised by not only how normal you are but by how many people will be supportive of where you are at. Happy climbing.
Thank you very much for this. I'm in a different place than you, and I'm not a climber, but I feel a lot of the same anxieties in my life and activities. There's a lot here I really relate to, and so much of what you said here is really helpful. Keep working on it--I think that's really the most important thing! And you're amazing.
At first I was scared of watching your videos because the first snippet I saw was of you doing countless pistol squats and I can barely do one. But then I saw the videos of you and Louis and you both were so charming and so excited (and maybe slightly hesitant) about climbing your anti-style that you won me over :) Anyway, this video deserves an award! It is so relatable and I think it should be playing in the background of everyone who has doubts while doing anything scary. Also, there's a guy that comes in to my gym every Saturday who is at least 70, has above the knee amputations, and uses prosthetic legs to climb. Nothing is stopping him, so what's stopping the rest of us?
I try to show all sides of myself on my channel, which sometimes includes being intimidatingly strong hehehe. But I'm glad that didn't totally scare you away!
Thank you for that video. Every honest voice, revealing the struggle behind the scenes is always bringing value to society. I have been climbing for almost 3 years, and at the beginning could not do even the simplest route. The biggest obstacle for me was to overcome shame. This one is still blocking me a lot at the bouldering part, less on the rope. So I mostly climb with rope but struggle a lot with fear of falling, trusting gears, and belayer. And each time I make a step forward, I come back to the same point where I still can not let go and fall above the clip, or with a lot of slack. This also makes me not improve how I would like to, and I am always scared that the climbing community will reject me for that.
Thank you for sharing this list ❤ as someone who has had anxiety stagnate all aspects of my life, this list is really helpful in terms of ensuring I don't put a redicilous amount of pressure on myself
Really valuable points and good reminders! Particularly struggle with these feelings when climbing alone at the gym, easier with friends. One helpful thing that I have found, when climbing with trusted friends with whom we have good communication and connection, is to ask them what they thought of a particular attempt or move or whether they saw/thought something similar to what I might have just experienced on the wall. Eliminates the guessing of "I wonder what they are thinking about me" when you ask them directly. Usually it does not reflect the struggling thoughts I had on the wall, and I think that that often makes my next attempt more free or more fun
Thanks Anna! As a 50 year old woman with slow progress I feel self-conscious at the climbing gym. simply because I'm outside the norm there. And whilst most people don't care I agree, I'm mindful that some younger people/men can see it as 'their space' and that can have an impact. And I do have a higher probability than a younger person of injury if I push myself and that can also make me self-conscious. But your video gives a lot of food for thought 🙏
I don’t think any young man is consciously thinking that it’s ‘their’ space. Young men are too wrapped up in themselves to even really give that many shits about you. They’re just there to climb hard, and maybe to flex a bit on the cute younger girls that are there. I legitimately can’t imagine anybody I have ever met at the gym in my years of climbing going out of their way to hate on or make fun of a 50 year old woman climbing.
@@bryanbryan6108 I said 'some' not all. And maybe it's unconscious. It is there though. And it's usually subtle and passing, and it's not going to impede anyone's climbing. Least of all mine. Very occasionally it's sadly not subtle. But your response to me feels dismissive. I accept it and have only commented here as the video is about how not everyone finds it easy to walk into a gym for a variety of reasons. Why do you feel the need to challenge someone's experience in such an unpleasant way?
As a 'returning' climber (after some years of motherhood), I can tell you your mere presence in the gym is inspiring to women of any age. We look at you and think 'it's possible. When i'm her age i can still be active and have fun'. I'm always wager to speak to older women in the gym, because indeed women start disappearing from the gym around 25 yo. I want to know how you pull it out ;)
@@shellytraverse I think he was skeptical about your assumed motivation for their behavior, not necessarily what you've experienced. Perhaps you could give examples as to why you know they see it as their space?
@@shellytraverseIt doesn't read very unpleasant to me although it's possibly a little masculine in its expression. I admit that I am a man but rather old and potentially subject to some of the same concerns as yourself. But I haven't seen any such issues in gyms whatever and I'm rather worried that the "diversity" culture war has the potential to disrupt that equilibrium. Climbing can easily absorb middle aged women as long as they are not also too aggressively "social justice warriors".
Wow, you are not only very good at showing your emotions, but also putting them into words people will understand! You do You Anna! Be happy, be sad, nervous, whatever! You'll live life to the fullest, no matter what😀
Honestly, everybody I have ever known deals with this. No matter if they are climbing or skating or playing volleyball or not doing sports at all. Then it is another topic they feel bad about because they think they don't do enough. It is just so human and since everybody is experincing this, we should all talk about this non stop. But we don't, which is kinda sad. I do feel these thing myself when I boulder and it hinders me to have fun and just enjoy the time. Thanks for making a video about this topic. It will make the people realise, that they are not alone with their anxiety.
First video I see from you, and I feel you sooo much. I don't know you, but I feel like I really do. Our minds think alike, our fears are the same (in regards to this issue at least), and so to see you succeed in what you want to do is amazing and really inspiring, not just in words...I'm crying right now. I have so many fears blocking me, especially when it comes to "judgment", and I prefered to exclude myself from society years ago...but now I feel I am missing out, that this time will never come back and I am not using it fully because of fears and projections. We are all just humans, whatever it means...and I love to see your humanity here. Seeing the wall of mean comments you got made me so upset, sad and angry, those are the things I am terrified of. I'd put too much value on them and cry every night...and to see you just flashing them in this video, like exorcising them, touched me a lot. Yours is an amazing and powerful journey, thank you for sharing it. Thank you for being human. A hug from a "haired pits" sister.
Very cool and lived out list. I also like the idea of being radically vulnerable - i.e. that we can self-empower by owning and showing our bad days or times we're afraid or even those days when we're not psyched. I think filming yourself for UA-cam is one way you do this, and you do a great job at it!
So well done Anna! As someone who also feels held hostage by a war in my head, this was really amazing to relate to. You’re wonderful and your channel is making climbing a better space ❤
@hannahmorrisbouldering I am going through something where I also felt hostage by my own mind. I am dead set on trying to develope myself however!
I just hope I can find a good strategy :)
It helps acknowledging that 99% of people out there don’t care, aren’t paying attention, and have other things on their minds. For the other 1%, if they throw any negativity your way then you know they have their own life problems and aren’t worth your energy anyways. I would also try to distance yourself from the YTer mindset in general. It won’t help.
Thanks Hannah! I think the same about your channel!! 💖
You and Anna are my favourite climbing channels ❤
thanks to both of you for your content! I guess it is really difficult not to care about your performance when you are doing it as your full time job.
in my experience of a hobby climber it is not so stressful. if I get into my head I remind myself:
1) I'm here to have fun, if it stresses me out I have to quit (oh no no no)
2) I have to trust my own body and move in my own pace.
3) I am not a bad person if I don't send a boulder, there will be other days and other boulders.
4) even if I love climbing, the life goes on behind the gym doors.
5) trust the process = good rest, proper mindset and practice, and the progress will follow.
I love climbing because you can do it with a male partner or stronger friends and still have fun together. I haven't noticed it before, but when I hear female climbers I realise, that trying to keep up with somebody else's progress, especially if they are male, is really unhelpful for us. I think we should never try to compete with each other, as long as we are not competition climbers. only then we can find joy and support in this amazing climbing community.
The REALLY tough step is to stop worrying about what ONESELF thinks about one's own performance.
Definitely still working on this one too 🙏🏽
Thank you for this video, it had me crying in places. I am a person who will climb with anyone and everyone in the gym and is generally not affected by others being there or not, but it breaks my heart whenever someone doesn't want to join the group on the new set because they are worried about all the "good" climbers judging them. I wish there was something more I could do other than just general encouragement. I hope this video reaches and helps at least a few people get over their fears of doing the sport we all love with others.
You made me tear up both for myself and for you. I am afraid to fall off the V2's at our gym because I think the other climbers will laugh at me, which means I'm not getting any better, which makes me sad. I'm going tonight and I'm going to try and be brave and fall off something...x Your vulnerability inspires others to be brave. 😊
Being a “strong” climber is hard. Being a strong person is exponentially harder. Your videos are wonderful to watch because you are in them. In life, All you can do is your best. That’s what I see when I watch you. Keep being your beautiful self and thank you for being Anna.
As a fellow woman who climbs, this is so spot on. Thank you for this video.
As a 56 year old male, with less than a year of bouldering experience in a gym, I found this video to be very interesting and thought provoking. Good on you for sharing your thoughts and experience in coping with anxiety and negative thoughts/emotions in the climbing world. Now, if only I had your strength to hang from a bar while casually talking about my pit hairs so effortlessly..... Your videos are wonderful and have been very inspiring for me, so thank you, and keep being you.
How has it been for you - body wise - getting into bouldering in the 50s? Ive been thinking about getting into it to hopefully help with various aches. Have been to the bouldering gym once for a casual look - the jumping down is a bit of a worry lol… How long before a knee gives out 😅… I wish I’d discovered the sport existed 30 years ago 😂
Your constant messaging through the channel of being comfortable in yourself and your presentation meant the world to me as an early transition woman who was scared of going to the gym for the exact same reasons - overdevelopment of muscles, body hair concerns, boys club vibes. Seeing you doing what you do and living your life and being absolutely gorgeous and amazing doing it helped me get out of my head and enjoy climbing in a way that would have been so much harder for me otherwise. Literally 10,000 thank yous :) you and this channel are the best
Thank you for sharing this story with me!! I have had so many conversations with my trans MTF friend about this exact topic, and I literally had this in mind when I started my UA-cam. I thought, if I'm gonna put myself out there more, I HAVE to be a positive representation for ALL women. I took 2 years to gain a healthy amount of weight, start lifting, and generally to take care of myself inside and out to make sure I could represent womanhood in an honest way that makes women feel included and proud. Sending power your way 💖
The bit about secondary emotions creating a loop of negative feedback hit so good. It's easy to write off your feelings on the wall as some inherent aspect of your personality that you just have to power through when really its just your mind running wild. A little introspection in those moments can go a long way, thank you so much for a much needed reminder that I don't have to be held hostage by my thoughts.
It's tough because as a highly sensitive/emotional person, I sometimes feel it's unfair I have ALL of these overwhelming feelings, so much more often than friends and other people I meet (or so I assume). I've learned that I may have "more" emotion than a lot of people, but it's more important how I respond to those emotions rather than having them in the first place. Like you say, it helps separate "aspect of personality" (i.e. having lots of emotions) versus something you can actively work on (i.e. response to the tons of emotions). Best of luck on your journey 🙏🏽
AnnaHazelnutt personally, it helped massively once I understood that whatever I'm feeling, be it embarrassment, fear, or anything, everyone else at the gym has probably felt at one point or another or is even feeling that right now. I finally noticed that none of the other people cared about whatever someone else was doing, so they're probably not going to care about me.
Positive experience is also a giant confidence boost. Even some small, friendly conversations helped me massively when trying to open up to the other people there. I found that the more open you get the easier the next step became and pretty soon you'll sit in a group random people that are projecting a level 6 that you couldn't even dream about and who cheer you on when trying your level 3 that they'd do for warm up. (Not a true story at all no no)
The video is amazing so please do the world a favour and keep posting.
I'm probably not your typical content viewer, but as a 60 year old, white CIS male, yours is my favorite climbing related internet content. Everything you discussed here makes you so relatable to someone who started climbing at 50, struggles with shoulder injuries and wrist tendonitis, and stutters a bit & has (luckily pretty mild) tourettes. So it's pretty inspiring to see you acknowledge the same myriad of mental struggles of climbing I have and overcoming them. I'm still working on a lot of it, but I have a lot of climbing left in me to improve.
Excellent video. I'm 60 yrs old and only been back into climbing for 4 yrs. I used to climb pretty hard stuff when I was in my late teens and early twenties but a fatal accident stopped me in my tracks.I feel very conscious of my lack of skill now compared to all those years ago. I feel in my head that people are thinking he can't climb any more. But it's me at 60 comparing myself to me at 20 yrs old.
It's so great to hear people loving climbing throughout their lives. I know I've found my hobby and sport in climbing and now I know I can keep at it for as long as I wish.
I turned 62 last week. Comparatively speaking you are just a kid!
I'm 67 and still improving. One of the guys I go to the gym with just turned 80!
This thread is absolutely incredible. I hope to climb in my 60's and beyond 🥲
I took a 15 break from climbing and just came back to it a few months ago, overweight and on the wrong side of 60 myself.
Realizing that you are projecting your own internal battle onto others is a great first step.
What works for me is a little different. About 20 years ago a fellow named Tracy Young told me he wanted to create a mountaineering team for developmentally disabled adults. We were at Tahquitz, getting snow showered off a 5.9 (Open Book?) I thought it was a great idea, so I sponsored, volunteered, etc. and The Trailblazers were born. We were only able to keep the program going for a couple of years, but they were a great experience.
One participant, named Ron Holland, remains my all time climbing hero. I mean that sincerely, not in the condescending way my daughters compliment me when I huff up a gym V3.
In all the ways we normally measure success - money, strength, high test scores, etc. Ron comes up short. But in all the ways that really matter - loyalty, courage, determination, Ron is one of the most amazing people I have ever met.
So when I shoot off a remedial problem and start judging myself, or worrying about what other people might think, I close my eyes, take a deep breath and whisper “climb like Ron”.
4:43 one time I was complaining about how I kept falling at the same place in a problem and this guy told me that falling is what makes you stronger and I realized he’s right and that really changed my mindset about projecting
I appreciate you SO MUCH.... the past year, I've fallen more into the pressures of the rat race...wanting to be BETTER, to be more SUCCESSFUL, to be RECOGNIZED in my pursuits. There's such a pressure towards perfectionism these days, literally in EVERYTHING you're doing (career, body image/self presentation, social media goal$$, blah blah) and it takes away from the FUN OF LIFE. Going to the climbing gym is FUN and trying problems that are weird or beyond you should still be FUN. Getting trapped in the "I-should-be-better, I-should've-sent-that, my-shoulders-are-too-big, people-are-judging-me" cycle of thoughts is easy to do, but sooooo isolating, and keeping you from potentially connecting with those around you and yourself. "I-can't-make-eye-contact-with-them-because-blah-blah-blah". Really working on breaking out of these games! Who gives a fuck if you're good or bad if you're having a great time at the gym and gaining something through it. Priorities of perfectionism are twisting everything around, and I'm so refreshed and delighted to hear you speaking against it. Omg this is a long youtube comment that I am embarrassed by my sincerity of, but holy shit y'all, have I been thinking about this a lot. Thanks Anna! Keep it up!
-a fellow broad shouldered, hairy armpit goofball climber
Although I don't personally experience this matter, being acquainted with individuals who share these very emotions has truly moved me on an emotional level
A beautiful response to experiences different from yours.
Hi ! I'm the someone on the other end that really needed to hear it. Thank you so much
What a beautiful love letter to yourself, highlighting the good you bring to the climbing world. You set a great example for others, including me
As someone who struggles with self confidence and a general sense of self, this really resonated with me. Your openness about your insecurities and your drive to overcome them is truly an inspiration - Thank you.
01:22 "What if I tried my best and still sucked" is a brilliant wording for that intrusive thought!
"Everything in nature grows only when it's vulnerable " you're growing 🌱 be kind to yourself 💖
Anna, you never cease to prove yourself as a representation of the best there is in our community, and we are all truly grateful for it. Your commitment to sharing your humanity through your climbing and to remind everyone that they too are welcome into our beautiful sport is reassuring and inspiring. Keep up the amazing work, love from Portugal 🌱
Thank you so much. Hopefully it helps open the floodgates for everyone to feel like they can be themselves, too.
Oh Anna, that was such a nice video.We never actually see these problems at others so of cause every body thinks "it's just me". That's why it is so important to talk more these challenges for your mental. Everybody has to face them (some more, some less) and it is much easier to face them knowing that overcoming your mental challenges is as hard as the moves on the wall.
You are by far one of the most relatable and welcoming climbers on UA-cam and you’ve been so amazing in your mindset and even inspire me to not care about what people think in climbing and in life 🥹🌈❤️.
Keep on slaying!
I have been always horribly anxious when taking tests. The debilitating anxiety was killing me. Finally I came up with a phrase that helps me and others in similar high pressure situations: "Five minutes of shame and your experience becomes a permanent history". Everything passes. Nothing is forever. We all struggle. Good people understand it and will try to support you. Always.
This is exactly why we need Anna Hazelnutt.
I will never forget when my clinical psychology professor told us that even when we feel very watched and socially anxious, literally no one else cares about you because they are too self absorbed! I struggle with judging my own performance (and thus feeling self conscious) because of how much stronger I was in the past...I realize I have to overcome that or it takes away from the enjoyment of climbing.
Your comments about self-expectations dominating your climbing (and life) mindset ring really true for me. I've climbed for so long that I have a performance baseline, where if I can't always meet that with ease, even when I'm out of shape or haven't climbed for an extended period of time, then I'm not doing a good job, and I should be ashamed of myself. It's a hard mentality to break. Soon, I'm going to start climbing after a year-long break, and my goal is to have low expectations while not holding myself back.
Thanks for sharing your story. It's always nice to not feel alone on the wall.
Really appreciate you choosing to make a video like this, lots to think about.
Fantastic video that I cannot believe I took 3 months to see!!! I relate so heavily to this, and I'm so glad there are folks in the community giving it the spotlight it deserves. Well done, and you're a true inspiration!
I am seriously going to bookmark this and play it before every crag and gym session now. I watched this for the first time after a particularly terrible kilter board session last night, I was feeling so terrible and down on myself - and it was like a virtual hug. Thank you so much for sharing and reminding all of us that it is totally ok to be human, mess up, and sometimes flail around on what we think we "should" be able to easily do.
🤗
You're such a huge inspiration to me. When you share your anxiety and fears and self-consciousness I can relate. Your words resonate with me and seeing you put your training out there in public, on camera, is so SO very impactful to me and others like me. While I may never have the confidence to go in front of a camera, your story is teaching me how to treat my time on the wall and training for my joy, for my experience. Thank you for always being kind and tenacious and giving climbers like us a voice.
Anna, you said a lot of critical things for climbing. Thank you! And your editing is world class!!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
this made me cry so much haha - seeing someone like you be afraid and “struggle” at times was so refreshing to see. thank you for this ❤
Anna! By being personal and vulnerable you just contributed to making the world a better place.
Thank you! ❤
This is fantastic. Not only are you discussing a really important topic, you are eloquent and thoughtful about it, and the video is exciting and interesting. This really helped me and will help so many others. Thank you for doing what you do :-)
I'm crying. Needed to hear this. Thank you so much.
I loved this video! You are right - no-one cares. Some people might have passing negative thoughts, but they aren't people I want to know or care about. I have found that most of the time, people are on your side. Lots of times when I am struggling on a project, people will join in and cheer you on. Most climbers are supportive and the few that aren't aren't worth taking up your head-space.
Love this, and one of the things I love about following your content is how human you are! The mental health aspect is so critical to growth as a person, outside of progression as a climber, and sometimes it's easy for me to forget to be a human first.
This video is something else. It' s so relatable I teared up. I have always been really self-conscious about my climbing and what other think of me and what I do. It got even worse when I become climbing instructor and expected of myself even more -to be at a certain level at all time. I put so much pressure on myself, it took the whole joy of climbing; it blocked me (psychologically) from finishing my projects. Finally, I decided to put away the "instructor" part for few years and just focus on climbing and re-finding my passion for it. Now I start to see that when I let go and just focus on moves (not the goal, not my fears) some weird magic happens and I finish my routes, easily; plus I enjoy the process.
I love that reframing process for you! I did a similar one from bouldering to sport/trad. Changing up disciplines and becoming a “beginner” again let me enjoy the process and bring it back with me to bouldering when I inevitably returned 🙏🏽
thank you so much for this. im a young female competition climber who has dealt with self-sabotage in... every area, but especially climbing, particularly because i can't stop comparing myself to others. i've been injured and have stopped climbing for almost nine months, but im going back tomorrow-- it was like a miracle that this video popped up today! i am going to do my best to not compare my journey to other peole's journeys, because it is my journey and my journey alone. thank you. you're an inspiration to me!
As a girl with social anxiety and depression, I can relate so bad. I've recently developed this weird habbit of climbing right under the top hold and then jumping down over and over - as if climbing it the way I did wasn't good enough or done properly. It was caused by a combination of fear of failure and pure self-sabotage. But then I watched videos of girl climbers, such as Janja, and decided to just try and see what happens. The day I made this decision, I finished several boulders that were quite difficult for me. :) And guess what, it turned out that the constant repetition of these challenging routes eventually improved my technique. The same way every person is built differently in terms of height, joints and muscles, we are different in the ways our minds work, but mindset is what matters :)
Omg I love that progression so much. Sometimes it’s hard to even see that we self sabotage ourselves until we get a broader perspective. Thanks for sharing ❤
OMG I MISSED THIS GENRE OF ANNA VIDEO 😭 killed it
Also guess what. I climb only caring what Anna (and girl crushers with Anna spirit) will think of me in the rare chance Anna walks into my inky dinky gym in Europe or I manage to make it to the buttermilks on day. And I really way attention to who I spend my time watching at the gym: only people whose STYLE on and off the wall I respect and admire-despite the grade. And I don’t spend my time watching anyone else. There are dissertations out there about the power and resistance of “the gaze” both our own and others’ right? ❤️❤️❤️ infinite gratitude to you
I am particularly grateful for this video. I've been going through it for a while and struggle with social anxiety and have self worth issues.
This could just be a channel about climbing and I'd be diggity down and still watch every upload. This video is really special and inspiring.
Once you started talking about identifying secondary emotions this video became legendary. What good advice to help people move towards mindfulness. Such a pleasant surprise.
Thank you so much 🙏🏽 still working on those pesky secondary emotions but I think it’s a good concept to keep in mind!
The beauty of this video about climbing is that it’s not about climbing. Thanks for sharing such a wonderful post Anna :)
Spot on! Love your message and especially how you said it. I think most climbers will cheer for you if you get a route that you've struggled on. Beating your own expectations and overcoming mental blockades is awesome. If you give it your all on a V2 and finally get it that gets me as hyped as seeing someone struggling and sending a V6.
GLOWING!! Love the energy and clarity that putting all this together does. THANK YOU XXX
It is so nice to hear about your fears, your feelings and what is hard for you. From the videos, you always looks so brave, fighting and keep at it untill you succeed. It's amazing to see all that and it is also amazing to see about the hard part.
What ever you do, I will always be so happy to watch your new adventures. And it is great that you are doing your climbing in your own way. You don't need to be validated by anyone!!! And no one has the right to validate you or not.
Wow!! Thank you so much for this video ! I didn't know I needed this but I really did. I have so much social anxiety and it always stops me from improving because I'm too scared to fail especially when people are watching. But I love climbing and I will do everything do keep going. This video gives me hope that I can change my perspective!
you made me cry by this beautiful & emotionful video. Thank you so much for sharing your insights and progress with social anxiety. You are truly inspiring Anna
OMG everything SINGLE thing you're saying at the beginning I can relate to.... Gosh thank you so so much for pointing that out
Thanks Anna for being so open. A lot of your points resonated with me. I am in a completely different demographic group: men who are starting to glimpse the chasm of old age on the horizon (I'm 65) but a lot of issues for my demographic group seem similar to yours. I have gradually become self-conscious in the climbing gym in a way I wasn't before. On a scary boulder problem I realise that I really, REALLY don't want to fall off because it will make me look like a doddery old idiot who will * thinks* bounce off the mat, do several desperate steps and still fall splat on his nose. So this is really helpful. I love your videos. The colabs with Tom Randall and the Wide Boys always make me smile.
I can really relate to 1:26 "what if I actually tried my best and still sucked".
This, I think, was my main limiting factor for like my ten first years of climbing...
Back then, I never tried my best and also avoided onsiting (unless really easy) for fear of failing.
Nowadays, I (mostly) don't fear these things and really enjoy trying hard on climbs where I estimate a 90/10 fail/success percentage.
Also related. I've switched more and more over the years from absolute to relative thinking (how hard/well you try is what matters, not how well it goes)
I really enjoyed this video, thanks for making it. Helps remind me I'm not alone in it.
Hahaha love that Oppenheimer frame, maybe people are busy with more "important" things (: You're great, Anna. Keep being you :)
This is precious, I'm taking notes. Thanks Anna
As someone who doesn’t really fit in with gender norms, it’s hard to feel like I’m not being judged by others who climb and that I have to work harder to prove that I am worthy of being at the gym. This was so beautifully said, thank you Anna
Thank you xx
Hi Anna,
Love your content! You're so strong both on and off the wall, have great energy and are generally a big inspiration.
Also f**K people that comment general hate and especially on your appearance. They really need to do some self reflection and growing. I hope you're able to give them the attention they deserve... None!
Thanks again for putting yourself out there!
I started climbing about 6 months ago, as the first sport (or really physical activity at all) in my life, at 35, there hasn't really been a moment at the gym where I haven't felt self conscious; except when I'm the only one there I guess...
Thanks for this video. That's all I can really think to say!
I’m sitting in my college dining hall alone after moving to a new state…this couldn’t have been better timed thank you infinity
great video! your becoming my favourite climbing channel
I had to leave climbing after growing up in the sport bc my anxiety started making every session just miserable. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to come back to climbing, but this video made me feel less alone, so thank you
Hey Anna, that list is bang on. I really enjoy watching your vlogs. You are a really fun, likeable climber with so much heart, so I hope this reinforces what you know to be true. Some people put up walls to avoid getting hurt, others wear masks, you are honest and welcoming.
such a wonderful, thoughtful, honest, vulnerable video. thank you for sharing it with us! you are my biggest role model in the youtube climbing scene!
Anna, as a (female) psychologist and mental coach, this was such a great video! Loved it!
My two cents: it is true that in most cases people care much less about us than we think. And in the climbing community, we are very lucky that this is in fact the case most times. However, there will be cases in which people will judge and reject you because of what you do, what you are or what you love. As a woman I was explicitly given the "instruciton" not to become too buffy while climbing and bouldering by a family member. Rejection can be painful. However, we can overcome this by being around people that loves us and accept us for what we truly are. The reason we are scared about people's opinion is because we give value to those. Therefore, let's learn to give value to the opinions of those people we care about the most!
@@AllegraClimbingPsychologist I was also told multiple times at the gym that it was good I was skinny and not buff like other strong girls, because they were manly and I was still pretty. This definitely f*cked me up in years to come and it took me a while to feel feminine and beautiful in my body. I still have off days but they're far and few between. Thank you for your two cents 🥰
This is the video I didn't know I needed. As someone who's been struggling to get back into climbing after injuries and other issues, this had me in tears. Thank you so much ❤
You're a good person Anna. Very wise thoughts. Well done for openly sharing these and inspiring others to become better climbers and human beings.
Love love love, Anna. I hope you know just how inspiring you are as a climber and a person.
Dude, I know we don't know each other but I love you so much. So much respect for so many aspects of who you are and what you do
Toward the end of this, you had a list of other people's negative comments, and every last one of them made you seem more beautiful to me. 🙏
I watch a lot of bouldering content here on UA-cam. What I find most helpful, inspiring and enjoyable to watch is seeing peoples progress. Yeah it's nice and impressive when someone flashes every route - but also intimidating. It's making me feel like an amateur and pressures me into the expectation that I have to do the same, that it's normal to flash every route, every grade, and that I'm a failure if I don't do the same. But seeing people fail, assess, improve, learn and progress gives me the tools - mentally and physically - to grow and become a better climber myself. So especially as feedback to you as a content creator in the bouldering and climbing field: The best videos are the ones where you fail, where you have to overcome your own struggles and have a learning experience. I feel the same pressure of expectation and shame and fear, I understand that it's part of the process and that you can't just flick the switch an shut it off (boy would that be great sometimes). Just know it's such a gift to watch your videos and it takes so much strength to film yourself and be vulnerable publicly. Thank you so much Anna for taking the jump time and time again - it's greatly appreciated. (Same goes for other creators as well.) This video is amazing. You're doing so great.
Love from Germany,
Jess 🤗🌻
Thank you so much!
Hey Anna, loved the video and how you showed us some tips for being kind to ourselves! And for making this for yourself too 🙂 Thanks for being an awesome role model out there!
Awesome video on a very important topic! This issue is not my biggest hurdle but I'm by no means immune to it.
Thank you for your beautiful idea. I personally enjoyed climbing the most when I tackle something very uncomfortable. But usually just afterwards. While doing it - it feels so bad in so many ways.
Honesty is the best inspiration.
Thank you for your enthusiasm and the inspiration you are ever so generous with!
May you always try more times than you fail!
Falling in actuality is quite literally the opposite [of failure]. That one hit. Thank you, Anna.
Just wanted to say I watched this before going out to my second climbing session of my adult life today.
My first session (a few months ago) had been ok, but the point at which I left was when the sense of inferiority got too much and I just felt defeated. Today's session ended not when I had (after many, many falls) sent my first ever V2, but when my hands and arms just had no more to give! I'm still thinking about the last problem I was trying for. I tried hard, I fell a lot, I rested and tried again, and I talked to strangers.
I credit that change of mindset to the failure-positive approach of UA-cam climbers like you, Louis Parkinson and others - so thank you!
Thank you so much, and thank you for sharing 🥲
The first time I saw you at the climbing gym, I was so excited. But, last week when I saw you climbing with a group of other really amazing female climbers, I felt the need to hide (in a sense). I definitely had the, "I'm only a V0 climber and they're all so much better than me" mindset. I also have fear of climbing in front of big groups of people especially when they're better. I didn't say hi to any of you and I didn't ask to try the V0 climb. Instead, I went around the corner to a different wall where no one was. No matter what, I love climbing and had a great session but, the fear of what other people would think of me definitely changed my course of action. Thank you for sharing this video 🩷
Oh no! I'm sorry if I at all came across as unwelcoming. I think for everyone, it's easier to climb with people trying the same climbs as you because you get to share beta and play on the same holds together. But I'm happy to climb with people climbing all levels and hope that if you see me in the future you can know with certainty that it's okay to say hi :) Especially if you come up and treat me like a normal human being (some people lately have been starting wild conversations with me or demanding my attention in ways that feel dehumanizing...)
The reason I watch your videos (and have now subbed) is because you always seem to find the fun in a situation, even if it's some outrageously scary trad thing. "The best climber is the one having the most fun" - Alex Lowe.
Well said Ana, I have been struggling through this for about 3 years. I have been fighting so hard in my head that is almost as painful as the physical pain I feel after a hard session at the gym. I got to overcome several of my struggles but I guess not enough yet to fully permit myself ascend. I guess one of the hardest things for me is to find myself belonging to this or that group, even though I know this is something that shouldn't be in my way. Unfortunatly, I fell that I need to be good to be going there or there, otherwise, if you don't climb this or that you are just left behind or have to count on specific chill days where people are not that focused on projects on the rocks. In the gym I can get myself through that now, but outside is harder. And when I go outside, if feels like day one again. It is a nice journey, but a really resilient one and is always nice to hear from female climbers, I feel really related to what you used to feel and this gives me strength. Thank you for being you, and sharing both success and failure with us. You are really inspiring. KMON.
This video is so refreshing, honestly your presence, your videos and your mindset are really inspiring and very much needed in this word !! I just wanna say thank you !
Anna. Don't put yourself down!!! I love watching your videos and I love your wacky sense of humour. When I was climbing in the 60's (yes 60 years ago!) there were no gyms, you got out there on the rock and climbed, or fell off, or both. I had a pair of Hawkins boots and on the rock I used an Austrian lightweight boot called a Kletterschue (or something like that) At about that time the first "sticky" boots came out, I think they were called "Masters". We used to wear old clothes to climb and walking in the rain we had our Peter Storm cagoule. Nobody bothered about how you looked but if you topped out on a good route you might get a round of applause from your mates at the bottom. I always told my son Be your own Man, but in your case Be your own Woman. Don't change anything and sod the the rest.💖
Oh my gosh that's so awesome haha. You're a badass! I'll take this one with me: Be your own Woman. Thank you!!
Thank you so much for this video, I really needed this right now.
I am autistic and suffer from really bad social anxiety. A few months ago, my partner (re-)discovered his love for bouldering and was really excited to introduce me to it. But my fears prevent me from trying new things, sadly they are very stubborn and I refused to come to the gym. But I know how much it means to him and I am also at a point where I can’t let my life be controlled by my fear anymore. So we had a little climbing date and I really enjoyed it. My boyfriend did some research to find the calmest gym and when there are the least people, he did everything to make the day as positive of an experience as possible and I am really thankfull. But I am also really proud of my self for overcoming my fear and taking a little step in the right direction!
This video came at the exact right time, a lot of your experiences resonate with me and it really moved me. After watching some of your videos I am really looking forward to my next time climbing!
Wow what a lovely thing to do for you/ and you for him! I’m so glad you enjoyed the climbing and can hopefully see that you’re supported in joining the community even if it doesn’t always feel that way.
Absolutely wonderful video. Thank-you for sharing! My take on #4 is that my failure gives others permission to fail. My being myself gives others permission to be themselves. Anna you are truly rocking it and I'm so pleased you addressed these issues that affect all of us, not just climbers! ❤❤
Oh, and I LOVE the fact you shaved one armpit so EVERYONE would have a problem. That's punk-ass in-your-face-ness right there!
😂🙏🏽 gotta keep climbing weird right? Miss the counter culture a bit so I try to bring it back hahaha
Under the facade of ego and destructive thinking we are all naturally confident beings it's the ego that keeps us in this self contained bubble of suffering. As a climber myself I ask myself who am I performing for, complete with your own potential , focus on being in the present moment. I think you are an inspiration to many Anna 💛
Thank you for your time in making this content, Ive been climbing for forty years now and in all that time I have constantly lived with social anxiety and faced the fear in my head. When I started climbing there were no indoor climbing walls anywhere near me so I had the chance to escape to small crags and quarries to find solitude and be by myself. As the years rolled by and indoor climbing walls popped up I had a real dichotomy of knowing that safe indoor specific training especially during winter would help push my climbing grades and make me stronger coupled with how on earth could I walk in the door and be in an area surrounded by people most of them younger than me who looked great and were climbing really well, I really struggled. I had many days and nights of driving to the wall and sitting outside in the van for a couple of hours at times scared to leave that safe space and enter inside gripped by fear having made the experience into an insurmountable barrier that I thought no one else would feel or understand, how wrong I was. As the years rolled by I gradually came to realise that most climbers and people in general all have some sort of fear or anxiety and most can switch off and hide or mask it well enough to let them carry on with their everyday life, we might not see it but its real and what changed for me was making a promise to myself that when I walked into the wall I would have to talk to two people on every occasion before I would start climbing, a kind of forced therapy which wasnt easy and it came with lots of awkward staring at feet and mumbling and scratching of heads but through time I came to see that the majority of climbers just didnt care, they were so focussed on themselves and making the most of their short time at the wall that they were not interested in me or my climbing or what grades I was pushing or what colour my Troll Omni pants were this week, it just didnt matter, it never had but I just couldnt see it. Talking to climbers for me and opening up about my fears is the thing that has seen my biggest progression and made me a better climber, Iam coming to the end of my climbing times now but for those new to the scene or for the young folks who are gripped by fear when walking into the wall then all I would say is talk, be honest and talk to those around you and you will be surprised by not only how normal you are but by how many people will be supportive of where you are at. Happy climbing.
I nearly cried while watching this video. Thank you so much for talking about this, it gives me all the feelings ❤
This is why climbing is a spiritual realization. It is all about knowing yirself. Om tat sat! Thanks Anna
Thank you very much for this. I'm in a different place than you, and I'm not a climber, but I feel a lot of the same anxieties in my life and activities. There's a lot here I really relate to, and so much of what you said here is really helpful. Keep working on it--I think that's really the most important thing! And you're amazing.
At first I was scared of watching your videos because the first snippet I saw was of you doing countless pistol squats and I can barely do one. But then I saw the videos of you and Louis and you both were so charming and so excited (and maybe slightly hesitant) about climbing your anti-style that you won me over :) Anyway, this video deserves an award! It is so relatable and I think it should be playing in the background of everyone who has doubts while doing anything scary.
Also, there's a guy that comes in to my gym every Saturday who is at least 70, has above the knee amputations, and uses prosthetic legs to climb. Nothing is stopping him, so what's stopping the rest of us?
I try to show all sides of myself on my channel, which sometimes includes being intimidatingly strong hehehe. But I'm glad that didn't totally scare you away!
Damn, Anna. I've always liked watching your videos, but now I also think you an amazing human being.
Thank you for that video. Every honest voice, revealing the struggle behind the scenes is always bringing value to society. I have been climbing for almost 3 years, and at the beginning could not do even the simplest route. The biggest obstacle for me was to overcome shame. This one is still blocking me a lot at the bouldering part, less on the rope. So I mostly climb with rope but struggle a lot with fear of falling, trusting gears, and belayer. And each time I make a step forward, I come back to the same point where I still can not let go and fall above the clip, or with a lot of slack. This also makes me not improve how I would like to, and I am always scared that the climbing community will reject me for that.
Thank you for sharing this list ❤ as someone who has had anxiety stagnate all aspects of my life, this list is really helpful in terms of ensuring I don't put a redicilous amount of pressure on myself
Really valuable points and good reminders! Particularly struggle with these feelings when climbing alone at the gym, easier with friends. One helpful thing that I have found, when climbing with trusted friends with whom we have good communication and connection, is to ask them what they thought of a particular attempt or move or whether they saw/thought something similar to what I might have just experienced on the wall. Eliminates the guessing of "I wonder what they are thinking about me" when you ask them directly. Usually it does not reflect the struggling thoughts I had on the wall, and I think that that often makes my next attempt more free or more fun
Thanks Anna! As a 50 year old woman with slow progress I feel self-conscious at the climbing gym. simply because I'm outside the norm there. And whilst most people don't care I agree, I'm mindful that some younger people/men can see it as 'their space' and that can have an impact. And I do have a higher probability than a younger person of injury if I push myself and that can also make me self-conscious. But your video gives a lot of food for thought 🙏
I don’t think any young man is consciously thinking that it’s ‘their’ space. Young men are too wrapped up in themselves to even really give that many shits about you. They’re just there to climb hard, and maybe to flex a bit on the cute younger girls that are there. I legitimately can’t imagine anybody I have ever met at the gym in my years of climbing going out of their way to hate on or make fun of a 50 year old woman climbing.
@@bryanbryan6108 I said 'some' not all. And maybe it's unconscious. It is there though. And it's usually subtle and passing, and it's not going to impede anyone's climbing. Least of all mine. Very occasionally it's sadly not subtle. But your response to me feels dismissive. I accept it and have only commented here as the video is about how not everyone finds it easy to walk into a gym for a variety of reasons. Why do you feel the need to challenge someone's experience in such an unpleasant way?
As a 'returning' climber (after some years of motherhood), I can tell you your mere presence in the gym is inspiring to women of any age. We look at you and think 'it's possible. When i'm her age i can still be active and have fun'. I'm always wager to speak to older women in the gym, because indeed women start disappearing from the gym around 25 yo. I want to know how you pull it out ;)
@@shellytraverse I think he was skeptical about your assumed motivation for their behavior, not necessarily what you've experienced. Perhaps you could give examples as to why you know they see it as their space?
@@shellytraverseIt doesn't read very unpleasant to me although it's possibly a little masculine in its expression.
I admit that I am a man but rather old and potentially subject to some of the same concerns as yourself.
But I haven't seen any such issues in gyms whatever and I'm rather worried that the "diversity" culture war has the potential to disrupt that equilibrium.
Climbing can easily absorb middle aged women as long as they are not also too aggressively
"social justice warriors".
Wow, you are not only very good at showing your emotions, but also putting them into words people will understand! You do You Anna! Be happy, be sad, nervous, whatever! You'll live life to the fullest, no matter what😀
Honestly, everybody I have ever known deals with this. No matter if they are climbing or skating or playing volleyball or not doing sports at all. Then it is another topic they feel bad about because they think they don't do enough. It is just so human and since everybody is experincing this, we should all talk about this non stop. But we don't, which is kinda sad. I do feel these thing myself when I boulder and it hinders me to have fun and just enjoy the time. Thanks for making a video about this topic. It will make the people realise, that they are not alone with their anxiety.
First video I see from you, and I feel you sooo much. I don't know you, but I feel like I really do. Our minds think alike, our fears are the same (in regards to this issue at least), and so to see you succeed in what you want to do is amazing and really inspiring, not just in words...I'm crying right now. I have so many fears blocking me, especially when it comes to "judgment", and I prefered to exclude myself from society years ago...but now I feel I am missing out, that this time will never come back and I am not using it fully because of fears and projections.
We are all just humans, whatever it means...and I love to see your humanity here.
Seeing the wall of mean comments you got made me so upset, sad and angry, those are the things I am terrified of. I'd put too much value on them and cry every night...and to see you just flashing them in this video, like exorcising them, touched me a lot. Yours is an amazing and powerful journey, thank you for sharing it.
Thank you for being human.
A hug from a "haired pits" sister.
❤ thank you so much. I’m glad you feel less alone. And I do too
wow this is a spot on video. Cool to see awesome creators talking about the less discussed perspectives 🙏
Very cool and lived out list. I also like the idea of being radically vulnerable - i.e. that we can self-empower by owning and showing our bad days or times we're afraid or even those days when we're not psyched. I think filming yourself for UA-cam is one way you do this, and you do a great job at it!
i usually don't like inspirational videos like this but dammmn you got me good! loved the entire video and all the thoughts in it