I think it should be implied that a narcissist was once a person who was a victim of narcissistic abuse, a child who is nurtured in a safe environment and never neglected during their growth should never ever be close to being a narcissist.
Many people seem to think the term "narcissistic personality disorder" is basically just a technical term for "spoiled brat", but it's really not that simple at all.
Refreshing to have discovered this man, when there are so many 'experts' expounding views on narcissism on UA-cam, that seem to be, at base, accusatory.
This guy is great! Explains complicated concepts clearly in simple language and with tremendous humanity and humility. He just cares about people, no matter how difficult that is. That’s pretty damn heroic.
Hey! I’m a narcissist, but can you imagine being us? Like putting yourself into our skin? Would you do different? When you parents wanted you to be perfect and flawless and they would dismiss any other state of yours? How would you be? I think, as every human being, we deserve to be treated with respect even though we’re not the best human beings out there. But it’s not our choice, and we have to deal with the denial and emptiness. Please, humans, have mercy and respect. Please help us to guide us towards the better. We may neglect it, but we will keep it inside forever as a way to wisdom.
I love the hand gesture he did as he discussed dismissiveness. I cannot count the number of times that hand gesture has occurred to me or symbolized the way I've felt around certain narcissists, even within a few minutes of meeting them. It's uncanny.
This is very good discription of what it is to be a narcissist. People seem to think Narc's are this way by choice or something and misunderstand that it is a psychological condition or disorder outside of their control. It's very easy to relate to if you were raised by one or married to one as some of these traits become part of you. I often hear discriptions that very often sound like me but I am not suffering with NPD.
I appreciate you encouraging us to understand and empathy for their pain. I don't think I want to stay in this HURTFUL relationship but I will pray for him every day. I love him dearly. But I don't want the meanness every single day
I've been trying to find someone who can help me navigate my world as I try my damnedest to fight my narcissism. I can't find anyone locally who is an expert in NPD or my possible Co-morbid condition of BPD. It sucks. I'm constantly shutting down my self- defensive thoughts and I'm doing as much generous things as I can, but it's like another doctor mentioned, I'm deep diving into pseudoempathy. I don't want to be like this so I work hard to fight it every day. It's exhausting.
We hear you. Don't know where you live but might be worth looking to see if any treaters have training in mentalization based therapy - it might help some. In terms of treaters, some BPD treaters should also have experience treating narcsistic pathologies or certainly being attentive to emotional avoidance, though I realize this is sadly a tall-ish order.
@@BorderlinerNotes Thank you for acknowledging me. In a completely non narcisstic way, it means the world to me to know someone understands. There's so much out there on how to avoid or leave a narcisstic relationship but nothing about how to navigate NOT thinking/acting like one. Thank you. 🥰🥰🥰
Yes... I think a lot of the narcissistic info is written by those who consider themselves victims of people with narcissistic patholoy which kinda skews the intention(?) of the information. Thanks for speaking so candidly!
@@rjrnj1 do you have any resources that you’d recommend like books, UA-cam channels, or techniques that you learned in therapy that have helped? I’m tired of viewing the world through this lense.
I'm almost to that point. My problem is thinking everyone deserves to be loved. I am EXTREMELY empathetic, so I am a perfect target. GET THIS, I am also a LICENSED COUNSELOR.
@Radoslav Bobek This may or may not be true. It plays a role but if you understand personality you'd know some genes are more likely to turn on in an individual than others. It's like big versus small light switches. You can be really horrible to a child and that flips a very small switch or you can have a child with a huge switch and be just a bit suboptimal and that is enough for the switch to flip. What switch? The switch for an individual trait or behavioral affinity. You get enough in one diagnostic criteria and there you go but I really feel it's foolish to think for sure the parent is highly responsible. Maybe or maybe not so much.
@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 unfortunately it is rather simplistic. and probably for most, wholly unconscious. so if we are conscious, now we can make a difference and stop these toxic and dysfunctional generational tendencies.
@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 you are aware parents and parenting largely affect how the child behaves and responds to situations? It’s up to the child to unlearn toxic behaviors in the future, but they rarely just develop it on their own.
Having empathy for a narcissist is how they manipulate you in the first place. All my relationships with narcs started with me feeling their behaviour was coming from an emptiness from within. Now after years of abuse and tons of therapy and awareness i no longer care about their sad lives..They can get help if they want or find another person to manipulate but it will no longer be me. I finally grew a back bone and i now know the signs to look out for.
Exceptionally difficult when they're actively hurting you. But it helps to know a diagnosis so you know where they're coming from and know how to respond.
My father was like that. He was very nice to ppl outside our family but unsupportive to fam members. His Mom was not nice to him. Now im learning how to let go of some of these ill behaviors he passed on. I feel that emptiness but I know how to resolve, in a healthy way.
Last night I Went to dinner with a family member who I believe has very strong traits of narcissism. We hadn't been getting a long for some months now because of X Y Z reasons mainly to do with his swearing, name calling and so on and so forth towards me. Whilst we were sat at the table, he barely spoke to me for the whole evening. I was the one making the small talk. I found it ironic since he was the one to ask me out. So what did I do, I just observed him and his behaviour. I infered from it that he was having a difficult time to loosen up and let go of what is in his mind the 'power rope.' He felt that if he spoke to me, and or took an interest in my life, he would become lesser than me. I felt sorry for him, I thought what a prisoner he is. Prisoner of his own ego and grandiose self.
I would suggest my mother and father who were both diagnosed with NPD are in fact, demons. Even my grandmother used to say that about them - and my mom was her daughter! They are evil, evil sadists...
Indeed, I think the symbolic meaning of casting them as demons is a service to their victims' (somewhat understandable) grandiose victimhood. It's simply not enough to claim horrific abuse, it needs to become supernatural. But I think as long as the victim had a good enough childhood they inevitably rebound sooner or later from their magical thinking, fantasy defense.
I have been watching your videos on and off for about 6months now and I must say you are absolutely incredible! An I thank you greatly for deepening my understanding to a problem I have finally come to the conclusion of identifying for what it is, with in the past year. I have been with him for 10yrs and let’s just say it’s been a journey through all the chaos, disloyalty, manipulation, impulsiveness and more. So once again I can certainly relate to this video, as I came to the concept that the negative and devaluing behavior he displays at times (especially when being called out on his B.S.) is basically a projection of how he feels towards himself. which has been very helpful in making my empathy greater, not my tolerability but my understanding.
My narcissist was horribly abused and neglected by his own father. One of many children they had to basically work the farm. The father never talked to my partner, unless it was to tell him what to do. The father never touched my partner unless it was to beat him. The father was a horrible man. Basically the whole family is narcissistic. So, my partner is empty. I try very hard to remember this when he's being an asshole. I also try not to feel too bad for him at the same time. It's been a very difficult 35 years.
WOW He is great 🤩 I can’t hear enough about narcissism > cause unfortunately I was forced to deal with it my whole life So I’ve been looking for answers most of my life
If the psychotherapist is trying to access that void in their core, the very thing they do not want to accept or even see, the narcissist could then defend through verbal aggression or devaluation. It's part of the dynamic, and a good therapist would tolerate that sadism or aggression, so they can keep exploring and helping the patient recognize the void within
In general, when the focus is on the partner abuse (which is where it mostly should be because narcissism itself is intractable), I'm concerned that the logical outcome is that the narcissist will time and again have to live through abandonment and alienation. That is their long-term lived experience. On the flip side, when the focus is on healing the narcissist (in line with psychology's default stance), it really does become too easy to inappropriately downplay the shockingly destructive abuse that the narcissist metes out. In any given case of partner conflict (victim/narcissist), will there be any psychology practitioner who delivers satisfactory resolution for both parties? Much appreciation to Dr Yeomans.
Great to have empathy towards a narcissist if you can afford to psychologically for yourself. That emptiness calls for an empath to WANT to fill it. In so doing, the empath sews the seeds of their own destruction.
Ty for clearing this up for us. Someone I metvthey dont care abd many more sy.suffer from this NPD. Its hard to have deep relationships zenith them . its all about their needs a d we are the door mats
My mother is a narcissist and so naturally I have BPD, she and my dad really fucked me up. I am 45 and still nowhere near getting over my hideous childhood. So I think guess the problem is that most narcissists don’t know they’re I’ll, and they get away with their lies and bullying. If my mother actually asked me for help, even now.. I would be there. Not gonna happen. Man hands down misery to man.
This is me to a T! It’s beyond stressful, drains your energy putting on a mask daily in public. If we can’t live with ourselves how can another? I want help
If the average person tries to empathize with a narcissist they’re gonna get run over, crushed. there is zero middleground. Interestingly, all the narcissists that I know have professions that require uniforms, and they often use their uniforms to get instant respect and authority over others. I realize this is just my experience and that there are lots of narcissists who don’t have jobs with uniforms. But this is been my experience.
From a therapeutic context, what he says makes a lot of sense -- getting behind the facade to see what ails the patient. Still, I wonder... From the context of current events -- this seemingly epidemic state of disrespect, arrogance, and outright malice: In the context of those who might seek to exploit this human weakness for their own gain... might they, conversely, seek to reinforce, legitimize and normalize the facade... by promoting it... emcouraging it... indeed, by modeling it? I'm reminded of the origin of the term in mythology -- the characters of "Narcissus" and "Nemises" at the fountain... a secretive intent of one to manipulate the other -- ultimately to victimize those to which they pay tribute.
Terrific explanation, thx! Generally try to avoid the obvious NPD's, but if I still have to deal with 'em, will occasionally compliment them on their less 'obvious' _strengths_ ...which they may also be out of touch with and totally overlook within the bounds of their more 'grandiose' self-image. But pretty much anything that makes 'em a bit more aware of their _unconscious_ drives and larger Self is to the good (and they're certainly not gonna turn down a compliment... lol)!.
Only wise people don't speak on things they have insufficient information on. A lot of people in comments sections smack of vulnerable narcissism, but who knows...
That they are an apex predator and you can BET it can feel that way! But, as I look at my former sister, she’s crazed - with absolute terror. I am her worst nightmare, because I simply exist, let alone me just getting my share of the estate. So, communicating with her was much like trying to have a conversation, with someone who’s throwing furniture at you. I’m not unintuitive and know a lot of the deeper and financial reasons for her behavior. But, I do know it comes from fear.
Me too....trying to brace yourself for it doesn’t work. Otherwise, these are wonderful presentations. Thing of it is, you fumble to turn it down and lose your connection. It’s an utter waste to have that there, poor form, shameful really because there’s a problem and they don’t correct.
@@user-pc2xn1iz8w I've done my community service, thank you. They can have all the compassion in the world I am capable of but I won't subject myself to the temptation again. Blame and responsibility all shared out equally.
I'm praying for my covert malignant narcissistic neighbour and her flying monkey husband. I'm asking God to grant them peace as asking for revenge is not good. As I find it almost impossible to believe that they would ever acknowledge that they need help I'm wondering what God has in store for them because the only way they would find peace would be through death which seems a bit extreme. I know the alternative is spending the rest of their lives in abject misery. If we consider ourselves good people we wouldn't wish this on anyone. I think I best leave this one to God.
Isn't it actually worse than say 'grandiosity, arrogance and entitlement' ? what about manipulation, lack of conscience, no blame acceptance (and all the other stuff like 'poisoning the well' in social circles)?
This is bull$h17, narcissist have huge egos and self worth, they have a lot of confidence. They are some of the most extroverted people who appear om top of life.
This talk is too short unfortunately , i agree with the emptiness part of narcissim but how you ''separate'' that and where goes the grandiose disorder with the annoyed part that goes more with the low self esteem peoples with narcissit masks who gracefully bash peoples standing their ground seeing narcissists everywhere and so many time will go further more in multitudes of subvert violences to feed their ego to keep them from accepting mistakes wich is the first steps in every recovery pathway and instead of having healthy attributions to move forward on topics or even worst to keep controlling what they are prove by then unfit to do ? Do you think better separation and strict definitions are required and maybe better soft actions in keeping the enclosure properly without multiplying unwanted behavior...
What can be more grandiose than a psychologist who considers his personality to be the golden standard against which every personality type is measured (and found lacking, naturally)?
They are not empty they are sadistic, dangerous individuals who delight in or create the misfortune of others. Impossible to treat a pathology the brain is dysfunctional
Yes. They're stuck in an immature defense mechanism. It is to live emotionally handicapped. No empathy. That explains the desperation of the irrational defense. They can't bear to face the emptiness inside them, would do anything to avoid their true self. They torture the rest of us bcz it's awful 4them. By definition, It is difficult to have empathy for someone who does not share it with you. It is oxymoronic.
Imagine twisting someone elses suffering to make them look like a monster. Anyway, I have low empathy (diagnosis for NPD pending but that at least I am certain of) and if you call us emotionally handicapped I suggest you consider your own empathy as well. We can maintain healthy relationships and feel strongly for other people, even if we don't have the ability to connect to their personal emotions.empathy is a feeling but compassion is a choice.
Break unconscious resistances may be really stressful for the patient and the therapist because it nulls the narcissistic defenses and shows off the weakness to someone who was used to feel grandiose and invulnerable... Does that answer your questions?
You are only partially correct in your statement. Yes, Trump is a narcissist of the grandiose type making eye rolling remarks about how great they are, believes they're never wrong is annoying behavior yes, but harmless for the most part. It's the narcissism that Biden and Obama have that should make you afraid.
It's nice to see a psychologist out there that actually wants to help narcissists just as much as they want to help victims of narcissistic abuse.
I think it should be implied that a narcissist was once a person who was a victim of narcissistic abuse, a child who is nurtured in a safe environment and never neglected during their growth should never ever be close to being a narcissist.
@@DanieleManca1983 I can agree with that as well. There is definitely a cycle of abuse.
narcissistic abuse doesn't exist but right lol
Yea and narcissists themselfs often were victims of abuse in their childhood
Ñl
Pw
Many people seem to think the term "narcissistic personality disorder" is basically just a technical term for "spoiled brat", but it's really not that simple at all.
Refreshing to have discovered this man, when there are so many 'experts' expounding views on narcissism on UA-cam, that seem to be, at base, accusatory.
This guy is great! Explains complicated concepts clearly in simple language and with tremendous humanity and humility.
He just cares about people, no matter how difficult that is. That’s pretty damn heroic.
I love this Dr.! He's the best !
I like how calm and methodical he is, very soothing to a BPD lol
Caring isnt enough tough you need to have clear understanding of mechanism as him to can be compassion towards narcs
Agreed😍
Because he has experience and education for such patients.
Hey!
I’m a narcissist, but can you imagine being us? Like putting yourself into our skin? Would you do different? When you parents wanted you to be perfect and flawless and they would dismiss any other state of yours? How would you be? I think, as every human being, we deserve to be treated with respect even though we’re not the best human beings out there. But it’s not our choice, and we have to deal with the denial and emptiness. Please, humans, have mercy and respect. Please help us to guide us towards the better. We may neglect it, but we will keep it inside forever as a way to wisdom.
Hey. How are u doing lately?
I love the hand gesture he did as he discussed dismissiveness. I cannot count the number of times that hand gesture has occurred to me or symbolized the way I've felt around certain narcissists, even within a few minutes of meeting them. It's uncanny.
This is very good discription of what it is to be a narcissist. People seem to think Narc's are this way by choice or something and misunderstand that it is a psychological condition or disorder outside of their control. It's very easy to relate to if you were raised by one or married to one as some of these traits become part of you. I often hear discriptions that very often sound like me but I am not suffering with NPD.
I appreciate you encouraging us to understand and empathy for their pain.
I don't think I want to stay in this HURTFUL relationship but I will pray for him every day.
I love him dearly. But I don't want the meanness every single day
Yes make sure the empathy doesn’t cross over into putting yourself in danger of being a victim.
I've been trying to find someone who can help me navigate my world as I try my damnedest to fight my narcissism. I can't find anyone locally who is an expert in NPD or my possible Co-morbid condition of BPD. It sucks. I'm constantly shutting down my self- defensive thoughts and I'm doing as much generous things as I can, but it's like another doctor mentioned, I'm deep diving into pseudoempathy. I don't want to be like this so I work hard to fight it every day. It's exhausting.
We hear you. Don't know where you live but might be worth looking to see if any treaters have training in mentalization based therapy - it might help some. In terms of treaters, some BPD treaters should also have experience treating narcsistic pathologies or certainly being attentive to emotional avoidance, though I realize this is sadly a tall-ish order.
@@BorderlinerNotes Thank you for acknowledging me. In a completely non narcisstic way, it means the world to me to know someone understands. There's so much out there on how to avoid or leave a narcisstic relationship but nothing about how to navigate NOT thinking/acting like one. Thank you. 🥰🥰🥰
Yes... I think a lot of the narcissistic info is written by those who consider themselves victims of people with narcissistic patholoy which kinda skews the intention(?) of the information. Thanks for speaking so candidly!
@@user-pc2xn1iz8w Thank you. I've discovered DBT and CBT Therapies and am in a much better place now.
@@rjrnj1 do you have any resources that you’d recommend like books, UA-cam channels, or techniques that you learned in therapy that have helped? I’m tired of viewing the world through this lense.
I agree with that. My husband have npd. Im planning to leave for good. My husband is nice with others for admiration but not with me
I'm almost to that point. My problem is thinking everyone deserves to be loved. I am EXTREMELY empathetic, so I am a perfect target. GET THIS, I am also a LICENSED COUNSELOR.
@@coatofmanycolors8397 I wish you the best in life
Run away as fast as you can. Yjur life is valuable honey🙏🌹
@@farangisehsani592 I'm working on that. Thank you
I was there & it was hard to leave
But sometimes that’s necessary for your life & sanity
Thank you for this. That deeper sense of empathy is also very helpful when the narcissist is your own adult child.
@Radoslav Bobek This may or may not be true. It plays a role but if you understand personality you'd know some genes are more likely to turn on in an individual than others. It's like big versus small light switches. You can be really horrible to a child and that flips a very small switch or you can have a child with a huge switch and be just a bit suboptimal and that is enough for the switch to flip. What switch? The switch for an individual trait or behavioral affinity. You get enough in one diagnostic criteria and there you go but I really feel it's foolish to think for sure the parent is highly responsible. Maybe or maybe not so much.
@TheParakiss2 this is probably the most difficult aspect of having a narcissistic child...there's really no one else to blame, but yourself.
@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 unfortunately it is rather simplistic. and probably for most, wholly unconscious. so if we are conscious, now we can make a difference and stop these toxic and dysfunctional generational tendencies.
@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 you are aware parents and parenting largely affect how the child behaves and responds to situations? It’s up to the child to unlearn toxic behaviors in the future, but they rarely just develop it on their own.
Having empathy for a narcissist is how they manipulate you in the first place. All my relationships with narcs started with me feeling their behaviour was coming from an emptiness from within. Now after years of abuse and tons of therapy and awareness i no longer care about their sad lives..They can get help if they want or find another person to manipulate but it will no longer be me. I finally grew a back bone and i now know the signs to look out for.
yeah.. i get what you are saying about being therapeutic with them rather than be annoyed..exceptionally difficult though at times.
Exceptionally difficult when they're actively hurting you. But it helps to know a diagnosis so you know where they're coming from and know how to respond.
My father was like that. He was very nice to ppl outside our family but unsupportive to fam members. His Mom was not nice to him. Now im learning how to let go of some of these ill behaviors he passed on. I feel that emptiness but I know how to resolve, in a healthy way.
I think this will greatly help those who have been destroyed by a narcissist in regard to forgiveness.
This is an exceptionally clear and complete explanation of Narcissism and should be the first clip in any series describing the personality disorder,
Wow! The sad side of narcissism that evokes empathy and pity on the narcissist… I’ve never heard it explained this well before. 😞
Last night I Went to dinner with a family member who I believe has very strong traits of narcissism. We hadn't been getting a long for some months now because of X Y Z reasons mainly to do with his swearing, name calling and so on and so forth towards me. Whilst we were sat at the table, he barely spoke to me for the whole evening. I was the one making the small talk. I found it ironic since he was the one to ask me out. So what did I do, I just observed him and his behaviour. I infered from it that he was having a difficult time to loosen up and let go of what is in his mind the 'power rope.' He felt that if he spoke to me, and or took an interest in my life, he would become lesser than me. I felt sorry for him, I thought what a prisoner he is. Prisoner of his own ego and grandiose self.
Excellent. Grandiosity is a defense mechanism. Narcissists cause harm, but they are not demons. Granted, they are annoying and sometimes much more.
I think of them as human posers
They’re just Just “off “
I would suggest my mother and father who were both diagnosed with NPD are in fact, demons. Even my grandmother used to say that about them - and my mom was her daughter! They are evil, evil sadists...
Indeed, I think the symbolic meaning of casting them as demons is a service to their victims' (somewhat understandable) grandiose victimhood. It's simply not enough to claim horrific abuse, it needs to become supernatural.
But I think as long as the victim had a good enough childhood they inevitably rebound sooner or later from their magical thinking, fantasy defense.
That was so nice l listened twice!
Great idea....i will fo listen again.
I have been watching your videos on and off for about 6months now and I must say you are absolutely incredible! An I thank you greatly for deepening my understanding to a problem I have finally come to the conclusion of identifying for what it is, with in the past year. I have been with him for 10yrs and let’s just say it’s been a journey through all the chaos, disloyalty, manipulation, impulsiveness and more. So once again I can certainly relate to this video, as I came to the concept that the negative and devaluing behavior he displays at times (especially when being called out on his B.S.) is basically a projection of how he feels towards himself. which has been very helpful in making my empathy greater, not my tolerability but my understanding.
Very clear explanation.
My narcissist was horribly abused and neglected by his own father. One of many children they had to basically work the farm.
The father never talked to my partner, unless it was to tell him what to do.
The father never touched my partner unless it was to beat him.
The father was a horrible man. Basically the whole family is narcissistic.
So, my partner is empty.
I try very hard to remember this when he's being an asshole.
I also try not to feel too bad for him at the same time.
It's been a very difficult 35 years.
@@justabhi3585 No, he probably never will be. Still an a-hole, a year later. I'm still hoping to move away, I need my sanity.
WOW He is great 🤩 I can’t hear enough about narcissism > cause unfortunately
I was forced to deal with it my whole life
So I’ve been looking for answers most of my life
Dr Yeomans said in the past treatment involved tolerating the narcissist's sadism but now it sounds like treatment is accessing the nothingness.
If the psychotherapist is trying to access that void in their core, the very thing they do not want to accept or even see, the narcissist could then defend through verbal aggression or devaluation. It's part of the dynamic, and a good therapist would tolerate that sadism or aggression, so they can keep exploring and helping the patient recognize the void within
How do you help them find their soul when they feel that they have lost it? What direction in therapy do you take? Can you recommend a book or two?
This makes so much sense
This is needed, crucial, priceless!! Also the channel Heal NPD 👍
In general, when the focus is on the partner abuse (which is where it mostly should be because narcissism itself is intractable), I'm concerned that the logical outcome is that the narcissist will time and again have to live through abandonment and alienation. That is their long-term lived experience.
On the flip side, when the focus is on healing the narcissist (in line with psychology's default stance), it really does become too easy to inappropriately downplay the shockingly destructive abuse that the narcissist metes out.
In any given case of partner conflict (victim/narcissist), will there be any psychology practitioner who delivers satisfactory resolution for both parties?
Much appreciation to Dr Yeomans.
Great to have empathy towards a narcissist if you can afford to psychologically for yourself. That emptiness calls for an empath to WANT to fill it. In so doing, the empath sews the seeds of their own destruction.
Ty for clearing this up for us. Someone I metvthey dont care abd many more sy.suffer from this NPD. Its hard to have deep relationships zenith them . its all about their needs a d we are the door mats
beautifully explained
Dr Yeomans is amazing
wow, what a great explanation.
Excellent video
My mother is a narcissist and so naturally I have BPD, she and my dad really fucked me up. I am 45 and still nowhere near getting over my hideous childhood. So I think guess the problem is that most narcissists don’t know they’re I’ll, and they get away with their lies and bullying. If my mother actually asked me for help, even now.. I would be there. Not gonna happen. Man hands down misery to man.
This is me to a T! It’s beyond stressful, drains your energy putting on a mask daily in public. If we can’t live with ourselves how can another? I want help
Great post
Thank you
Thank you. This is so.
If the average person tries to empathize with a narcissist they’re gonna get run over, crushed. there is zero middleground. Interestingly, all the narcissists that I know have professions that require uniforms, and they often use their uniforms to get instant respect and authority over others. I realize this is just my experience and that there are lots of narcissists who don’t have jobs with uniforms. But this is been my experience.
From a therapeutic context, what he says makes a lot of sense -- getting behind the facade to see what ails the patient.
Still, I wonder... From the context of current events -- this seemingly epidemic state of disrespect, arrogance, and outright malice:
In the context of those who might seek to exploit this human weakness for their own gain... might they, conversely, seek to reinforce, legitimize and normalize the facade... by promoting it... emcouraging it... indeed, by modeling it?
I'm reminded of the origin of the term in mythology -- the characters of "Narcissus" and "Nemises" at the fountain... a secretive intent of one to manipulate the other -- ultimately to victimize those to which they pay tribute.
Terrific explanation, thx! Generally try to avoid the obvious NPD's, but if I still have to deal with 'em, will occasionally compliment them on their less 'obvious' _strengths_ ...which they may also be out of touch with and totally overlook within the bounds of their more 'grandiose' self-image. But pretty much anything that makes 'em a bit more aware of their _unconscious_ drives and larger Self is to the good (and they're certainly not gonna turn down a compliment... lol)!.
Nature abhors a vacuum.
Have NO DESIRE to be therapeutic with a narcissist; that is THEIR JOURNEY. A 24/7 relationship would kill my soul: been there, done that.
The emptiness sounds like hell
Narcissism is somewhat like a swollen soul.... it looks just like muscular one
Not really. The emptiness is in their eyes. It’s in plain sight.
Narcissism can also be expressed by portraying oneself as an answer man in the lens of black and white
Only wise people don't speak on things they have insufficient information on. A lot of people in comments sections smack of vulnerable narcissism, but who knows...
@@KoreaMojo
I think you’re more correct than you realize
👍👍👍👍 well explained !
That they are an apex predator and you can BET it can feel that way!
But, as I look at my former sister, she’s crazed - with absolute terror. I am her worst nightmare, because I simply exist, let alone me just getting my share of the estate. So, communicating with her was much like trying to have a conversation, with someone who’s throwing furniture at you. I’m not unintuitive and know a lot of the deeper and financial reasons for her behavior. But, I do know it comes from fear.
could you please remove that beep from the start of the videos. it is both loud and annoying.
Me too....trying to brace yourself for it doesn’t work. Otherwise, these are wonderful presentations. Thing of it is, you fumble to turn it down and lose your connection. It’s an utter waste to have that there, poor form, shameful really because there’s a problem and they don’t correct.
When the mayonnaise jar is empty, you toss it out - and leave empathy to the professionals.
@@user-pc2xn1iz8w A Narcissist is not a human being.
@@user-pc2xn1iz8w I've done my community service, thank you. They can have all the compassion in the world I am capable of but I won't subject myself to the temptation again. Blame and responsibility all shared out equally.
What about people who live in the arcane world, who live the magic Kingdom?
Would be nice if you did attachment styles. Also bpd w comorbid bipolar. Npd w comorbid bipolar.
Wow
They have to tune the white noise into an harmonious image.
What about covert narcissists which actually seem pretty humble?
I'm praying for my covert malignant narcissistic neighbour and her flying monkey husband. I'm asking God to grant them peace as asking for revenge is not good. As I find it almost impossible to believe that they would ever acknowledge that they need help I'm wondering what God has in store for them because the only way they would find peace would be through death which seems a bit extreme. I know the alternative is spending the rest of their lives in abject misery. If we consider ourselves good people we wouldn't wish this on anyone. I think I best leave this one to God.
Isn't it actually worse than say 'grandiosity, arrogance and entitlement' ? what about manipulation, lack of conscience, no blame acceptance (and all the other stuff like 'poisoning the well' in social circles)?
This is bull$h17, narcissist have huge egos and self worth, they have a lot of confidence. They are some of the most extroverted people who appear om top of life.
Yes top athletes.
❤
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May Allah bless you and guide us all
Sounds like the Koch brothers. No amount of money can fill that hole.
This talk is too short unfortunately , i agree with the emptiness part of narcissim but how you ''separate'' that and where goes the grandiose disorder with the annoyed part that goes more with the low self esteem peoples with narcissit masks who gracefully bash peoples standing their ground seeing narcissists everywhere and so many time will go further more in multitudes of subvert violences to feed their ego to keep them from accepting mistakes wich is the first steps in every recovery pathway and instead of having healthy attributions to move forward on topics or even worst to keep controlling what they are prove by then unfit to do ? Do you think better separation and strict definitions are required and maybe better soft actions in keeping the enclosure properly without multiplying unwanted behavior...
What can be more grandiose than a psychologist who considers his personality to be the golden standard against which every personality type is measured (and found lacking, naturally)?
They are not empty they are sadistic, dangerous individuals who delight in or create the misfortune of others. Impossible to treat a pathology the brain is dysfunctional
Yes. They're stuck in an immature defense mechanism. It is to live emotionally handicapped. No empathy. That explains the desperation of the irrational defense. They can't bear to face the emptiness inside them, would do anything to avoid their true self. They torture the rest of us bcz it's awful 4them. By definition, It is difficult to have empathy for someone who does not share it with you. It is oxymoronic.
Imagine twisting someone elses suffering to make them look like a monster. Anyway, I have low empathy (diagnosis for NPD pending but that at least I am certain of) and if you call us emotionally handicapped I suggest you consider your own empathy as well. We can maintain healthy relationships and feel strongly for other people, even if we don't have the ability to connect to their personal emotions.empathy is a feeling but compassion is a choice.
Dismantle ? & why is that thing shaking so much? wtf.
Break unconscious resistances may be really stressful for the patient and the therapist because it nulls the narcissistic defenses and shows off the weakness to someone who was used to feel grandiose and invulnerable... Does that answer your questions?
Zero empathy regardless of the possible root cause.
i want to cuddle with him
Who is the interviewer? Is she NPD?
I highly doubt it :P
Wow, a youtube channel devoted solely to Donald Trump's personality disorders.
You are only partially correct in your statement. Yes, Trump is a narcissist of the grandiose type making eye rolling remarks about how great they are, believes they're never wrong is annoying behavior yes, but harmless for the most part.
It's the narcissism that Biden and Obama have that should make you afraid.