My personal technique whenever someone disrespects me is to take that one sentence they've just said and ask them in a calm manner "Why did you say that ?" . Last time a colleague made a joke that was an insult to my job but disguised as a joke - so I asked him in front of everyone "What makes you think the work I do is useless ?". And he couldn't answer the question because clearly my work is useful in my company it's just not very technical and that particular colleague only respects highly technical people. So there's not need to engage in a verbal fight whenever someone disrespects us, just ask them to justify what they've just said. Reasonable people will never attack you or insult you, if they have a feedback to give you about yourself or your work they will do it in a quiet way. Unreasonable, jealous, hateful people will resort to insults and passive agressivness and there's just no need to stoop to their level.
Yeah i love doing that to hating projectors, they say something baseless and if u ask them to explain themselves, depending on how serious they are its like they're a lawyer in court without a case and they back off, most of the time theres no hard feelings since we js banter, but the delulus who got a real bone to pick w u js gotta get bullied a little imo. And its funny since the degree of someone getting offended or not is entirely based on the person themselves, Its kind of an ass move but hey i dont like getting pissed
@@blueskythinking8312 it takes reflecting and putting urself out there, i was the same for a few years, but once you can read the invisible "kick me" sign on your back, it becomes a whole lot easier to read others, trust me we all have one and its on us for letting others use it
dr Ana posted, legal eagle posted, I only had to work a half day but got paid for a full one today, homework is done and the only class I have today is optional and the professor is going to feed us. Today is awesome 🤩
I recently had to take part in a study about boosting self esteem for my psych degree and they had us doing affirmations, listening to "empowering" music (whatever that means to you i guess) and a bunch of other stuff. Truly, the only thing that worked for me was reducing my time spent on certain social media apps.
I think the part about misaligned values was a huge eye-opener for me. The times when I notice my inner dialogue being the most negative towards myself is right after I have failed to keep a promise to myself, or when I have done (or not done) something that goes against my values. I'm going to reflect on this, and I believe this will help drive me to be the person I want to be. This has helped so much! Thank you! You really have a way of explaining the crux of these issues clearly, concisely, and with excellent examples!
I did not do well in therapy my first time (1.5 years) because I felt I was always being affirmed; it drove me crazy because I felt like I was getting very little out of it and not growing/changing at all. Videos like this help; your outside perspective helps with self-reflection.
I appreciate the notes about overcorrecting! When I started learning to express my opinions, sometimes I would do so too harshly, and not in a way that felt authentic to me, because I was fed up. Expressing myself in a reactive way actually made me feel worse about myself, because it was out of alignment with my values. Something my therapist taught me when we were working on self-esteem and assertiveness, is how to develop a way of expressing opinions that feels authentic to you. For me, we realized that most (underline most!) of the time when I expressed disagreement, I could still be warm, compassionate and patient, because that aligned with my values.
If u genunely got bad self esteem try to own the tips as ur own, this creation of depth creates value and reshapes ur lense to reality. Works for everyone, the catch is u gotta be honest with urself
My boss is always interpreting my actions and words negatively. Being judged incorrectly and unfairly is especially difficult when the person has authority over you and your livelihood, but all of Dr Ana’s suggestions here still work in that case! I’ve made a personal mission statement for myself at work and I abide by it. I take excellent care of clients and I always have my work done correctly and on time. Boss still treats me unfairly, but I’m not going to worry about it. I know my work ethic and the value I bring and if the time comes I’ll take my talents elsewhere :)
Dr. Ana has a video (posted in 2023) where she talks about black & white thinking. In the video, she encourages a mindset shift away from thinking in extremes like "always" and "never". You might find that video helpful as well.
@ I am aware that some people over- and misuse “always” and “never” and in this case, my statements are true. My boss indeed always finds a negative interpretation to every word I say. My work is actually always done correctly and on time.
It's always been my biggest pet peeve when therapists and psychiatrists tell me to do self affirmations, especially in my group outpatient--I felt unbelievably stupid doing them with everyone and couldn't understand how it's supposed to work for people Guess I needed a different perspective! I think back on situations I've been in and realize that I do trust the way I acted. Some things that I've been conditioned to believe really just were projections of others (which was obvious to everyone else but me ofc) Thank you for the video! subbed
This is why my mom thinks im arrogant for questioning what my doctors(everyone) say, like im sorry they just dont know what the hell they talking bout sumtimes, with that said theyre perspective is *they're perspective* and mine is mine it makes taking advice a lot easier
These are the most accurate advices I’ve ever heard. All the infos here I’ve heard abt before in several places, you did a great job putting them all in one video and explaining them!
As soon as you mentioned hospotality, I was like, here we go 💀 been there sis I really liked this advice, quite different from the typical you mentioned at the start of the video. I sometimes worry when I'm trying to boost my self esteem I might delude myself or start being egotistical. Your suggestions, I feel, will still keep me grounded.
Ana, a best friend accused me of being mean when I was offering a different perspective. I did take it into consideration. It hurt because of how untrue it was, not because she was right. Thank you for this.
I’ve never had great self esteem, but it’s a lot worse now I’m in my 30’s. Ive lost two jobs within the space of 3 months because I was essentially told that I wasn’t good enough. The manager from the one job told me to ‘pretend to be someone else’, as you can imagine this has had a very negative impact on the way I feel about myself, even though I know I didn’t do anything wrong.
That's messed up but remember you're worthy of better and how people see you is none of your business. It's their interpretation that comes from their internal psyche for better or worst. It's not fact.
I appreciate this video so much! It was affirming realising that I’ve subconsciously gotten better at disagreeing with people respectfully after my goal to be truer to myself this year ❤
I always feel like Dr. Ana is always speaking directly to me. Thank you sis for all the work you're doing and sharing your wisdom and knowledge with us. ❤
Love the way you speak .. calmly and soothingly in details like you really want to explain something in which you believe, and unlike others who seem to be in a hurry always! Also you dont use fillers! Love it 💕like honey to my ears✨
I would say I'm decently selfless, almost to the point where I think it's a little selfish. And I think the idea of not being able to keep a promise to yourself will inevitably ruin the promises that you want to make to others helped made me realize why I should be more of a self advocate, instead of being a people pleaser.
I love your videos so much, every time you post and i see the thumbnail i know i have a really good video to watch and its just the best feeling, your channel is a source of comfort and a safe space for introspection for me Im always excited and awaiting in cheerful support of the next video you upload
Speaking up against my first bullies, my parents, helped a lot. I always thought that it's my duty to accept them whatever they do. Pretend everything is at least acceptable. It wasn't. For years I was treated like shit and did nothing about it. Speaking up was uncomfortable as fuck but deep down I knew nothing else matters as much as this. Because nothing else hurts as much as your parents hatred.
You’ve got to have courage. If it’s your first time asserting yourself, it’s going to take a hell of a lot of courage and this cannot be avoided. You’ve got to make that step for yourself
Aw thank you for this ❤☺️ Very well said :) It was especially the last tip for me that was insightful. I believe I’m quite assured but I saw this video show up & immediately wanted to hear what you had to say, thank you for its advice ✨
A senior colleague at work doesn't like me. He gets mad at me for doing anything, even when it's exactly what he wanted. The sad thing is he was super cool in the beginning and I even had a crush on him because he was so cute. Any slight hiccup and he loses it but when I do a decent job he pretends I don't exist. Sometimes we idolise people because we feel attracted by whatever it is they have and then we let ourselves get run over not realising the other person is not perfect and that inperfection can be at our expense.
Great video! I’ve been having conversations with friends on how to build self esteem and the process looks different for everyone, so this video came at the right time. Will definitely share this video with them. *side note* It’s funny how you have “corny” in the title. I wonder if you could explain or get into why we consider things cringe or corny, despite them being healthy or harmless (e.g., the examples you mentioned in the beginning as “corny”)
Sure! I think positive affirmations can feel dishonest for people sometimes because they sound like an overcompensation. No one needs to keep repeating "I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy" unless they struggle with self-worth. I think it can feel a bit "the lady doth protest too much" for people. Like when someone goes on a long tangent trying to convince themselves of something they don't even believe to be true. That being said, speaking to ourselves kindly and positive thinking absolutely can rewire our brains. It just needs to be done in a way that feels honest, not like we're trying to convince ourselves of something we unconsciously don't believe.
Moral of the video: that awareness that just read this is the only thing thats gonna be with u for ur whole life, LOVE IT. Theres a lot of tips in this and all are so valuable but u gotta take the time to apply the ideas as ur own, otherwise its a "do what others do" cycle. I think at least
Turns out I don't have an issue with self esteem. Friend or not, I'm an arbiter of truth. It doesn't mean being loud or a jerk. If you do it with grace and civility, you'll only lose friends that aren't good for you, weed them out. I think ppl know if I don't agree with them, my stance with them doesn't change unless it's extreme and if that's the case, 95% of ppl wont get along with the individual and if you get to close to that opinion be prepared to be tarred with the same brush. Ppl are welcome to their opinions and to attack someone on it, gives them defensive resistance to change their opinion in the future, doing everyone a disservice
What if someone has a value system based on achievement? For example, earning a lot of money or being the best at something that is typically very difficult to achieve. Sometimes it is literally impossible to achieve the goal. How does one address the values-to-self-esteem problem in that case?
I agree with how Dr. Ana put it as Tip #5/external validation around timestamp @9:54 - if our self-esteem fluctuates based on how we place in some external competition or trying to impress or please other people, then that's not a grounded form of self-esteem. Trusting that we're enjoying the process of mastering new skills and growing personally by taking on fulfilling challenges might be a better "value" to try aligning with. It matters most how we feel about ourselves, win or lose, exceptional or still learning.
I'd say some of these depend on context. I hold controversial philosophical and political convictions, I would not get very far in my social reconstruction if I openly stated my political or philosophical perspective on any currently debated issues outside of very, very specific book clubs.
tips to boost your self esteem, as a man: have lots of money from your parents have good genetics mixing this two gives you confidence and women women bring more confidence and more women enjoy the infinite loop of self esteem
I have to admit my red flag radar goes up when someone talks about their value being beauty and then giving advice about self esteem. Making a jump to… I didn’t realize they just had Botox seemed like it came out of nowhere. I have a parent with a sun allergy. It’s photosensitive skin, not really an allergy. I think it’s called that because where ever their skin is hit with UV radiation they break out into itchy hives. If someone didn’t understand what someone meant and it was on their mind that long they would google it. Pretending you didn’t as a way to give a backhanded insult to a stranger.,. Then talking about others being passive aggressive. It just seems kind of ironic and like a missed opportunity to fix doing that. If it was rare in people it wouldn’t be a problem. It’s a problem because people don’t like to admit they do it…. Being passive aggressive is a gain short term but surprisingly long term it does the opposite and wrecks almost everything for people. It’s like giving your dog a treat whenever it does something wrong.
do u think people with good self esteem never feel embarrassed or doubt? that validation feels good and rejections hurt. i think they still do feel those things but cope better
Relatively new sub here, thanks for the video; would it be wise or feasible for low self esteem ppl to use grey rock towards those they try to please if they're the source of the tearing down they experience?
When you said that in general you should trust yourself more, I wish you had a short list of specific questions that someone with low self esteem could ask themselves to see if others critique is valid or not. Your advice could be much more actionable.
Hey Ana! Awesome video! Thank you so much, I really needed this! I was going to ask - I don’t know whether this is really appropriate or in your field of interest but what do you think about what happened in the first round of the Romanian presidential elections? What happened on Sunday kind of captivated the attention of a lot of people, even outside of Romania too, and I’m finding the whole situation really interesting…
Could you please share the episode you are talking about? I've never seen the series but I feel like I'd like to watch that episode to reflect on my own situation
I agree with most of it but i think there are givers and takers. Ppl who put others first and ppl who always put themselves first. Accepting ones flaws is also good. Yes I saw you express yourself more not just reading from a book yet it is just groundless opinion if it not backed by research or experience. I am always right because I have a title and a degree doesn't hold. I remember years ago in your doctorate you were not aware of the difference between guilt and shame. It is not a big deal but it is still important in therapy i suppose and it just proves how shallow education is. I know I studied myself and lots of litterature was thrown on us and not everything made sense. And i like smart ppl and you are one of them. But now you try to position yourself as simply knowing because u are a doctor and never give credit to anybody. You went from one extreme to the next.
Does self esteem matters at all? Mine was always extremely low and even now I can't completely get off the feeling of hating myself, but what helped me was not boosting it but accepting the fact that I might be an awful unlikeable and incompetent person and live with it Like I still view myself like this but it cripples my mental wellbeing a lot less
Hi. I am vivek from India. I teach high school students. Your videos really help me understand teenage behaviour and help me motivate my students. Thanks. Is there any social media platform we can connect on so that I may benefit more from your expert advice?
1:30 my girlfriend has low self esteem, when I complement her, I am very specific with nongeneric focuses. "you have wonderful cheekbones like god plucked the full moon from the sky and put half on each side of your face" 12:40 nah easy, screamers are evil people, like who tf flips out on a stranger for any reason?
She never said they were corny. Positive affirmations aren't wrong they just often aren't enough without aligning our actions with our personal values.
Check out Self-Esteem Boost playlist by Ana on Aura. aurahealth.io/refer/aura-5jcsl/playlist/o6yLR70bL9RudPEVGD5LhwJeyNa2/-OCMvmCLhdfwRFgGKiWF
My personal technique whenever someone disrespects me is to take that one sentence they've just said and ask them in a calm manner "Why did you say that ?" . Last time a colleague made a joke that was an insult to my job but disguised as a joke - so I asked him in front of everyone "What makes you think the work I do is useless ?". And he couldn't answer the question because clearly my work is useful in my company it's just not very technical and that particular colleague only respects highly technical people. So there's not need to engage in a verbal fight whenever someone disrespects us, just ask them to justify what they've just said. Reasonable people will never attack you or insult you, if they have a feedback to give you about yourself or your work they will do it in a quiet way. Unreasonable, jealous, hateful people will resort to insults and passive agressivness and there's just no need to stoop to their level.
Yeah i love doing that to hating projectors, they say something baseless and if u ask them to explain themselves, depending on how serious they are its like they're a lawyer in court without a case and they back off, most of the time theres no hard feelings since we js banter, but the delulus who got a real bone to pick w u js gotta get bullied a little imo. And its funny since the degree of someone getting offended or not is entirely based on the person themselves, Its kind of an ass move but hey i dont like getting pissed
Problem is i cant think of this in the spur of the moment. I dont realize it's an insult till later
Worse, they'll deny it
@@blueskythinking8312 it takes reflecting and putting urself out there, i was the same for a few years, but once you can read the invisible "kick me" sign on your back, it becomes a whole lot easier to read others, trust me we all have one and its on us for letting others use it
stealing this technique this sounds so useful oh my god
Someone once told me that other people’s opinions of you are none of your business and I’ve always remembered that
dr Ana posted, legal eagle posted, I only had to work a half day but got paid for a full one today, homework is done and the only class I have today is optional and the professor is going to feed us. Today is awesome 🤩
Best feeling in the world ☺️
love your positivity
I've never clicked on a video so fast
I recently had to take part in a study about boosting self esteem for my psych degree and they had us doing affirmations, listening to "empowering" music (whatever that means to you i guess) and a bunch of other stuff. Truly, the only thing that worked for me was reducing my time spent on certain social media apps.
I think the part about misaligned values was a huge eye-opener for me. The times when I notice my inner dialogue being the most negative towards myself is right after I have failed to keep a promise to myself, or when I have done (or not done) something that goes against my values. I'm going to reflect on this, and I believe this will help drive me to be the person I want to be. This has helped so much! Thank you! You really have a way of explaining the crux of these issues clearly, concisely, and with excellent examples!
I did not do well in therapy my first time (1.5 years) because I felt I was always being affirmed; it drove me crazy because I felt like I was getting very little out of it and not growing/changing at all.
Videos like this help; your outside perspective helps with self-reflection.
I appreciate the notes about overcorrecting! When I started learning to express my opinions, sometimes I would do so too harshly, and not in a way that felt authentic to me, because I was fed up. Expressing myself in a reactive way actually made me feel worse about myself, because it was out of alignment with my values.
Something my therapist taught me when we were working on self-esteem and assertiveness, is how to develop a way of expressing opinions that feels authentic to you. For me, we realized that most (underline most!) of the time when I expressed disagreement, I could still be warm, compassionate and patient, because that aligned with my values.
The past two videos have been exactly what I've been needing! Thanks for all that you do!
I'm so glad!!
I needed this. My self-esteem sucks pretty bad no matter what I’ve tried
Did you try standing up for yourself to people who wrong you and cutting people out when they don't get the hint?
@ I usually do. I only have a few friends, but I know they’re good people and I trust them
If u genunely got bad self esteem try to own the tips as ur own, this creation of depth creates value and reshapes ur lense to reality. Works for everyone, the catch is u gotta be honest with urself
do or work towards something of value and that issue will fix itself
I listen to these while I draw, perfect flow state material
My boss is always interpreting my actions and words negatively. Being judged incorrectly and unfairly is especially difficult when the person has authority over you and your livelihood, but all of Dr Ana’s suggestions here still work in that case! I’ve made a personal mission statement for myself at work and I abide by it. I take excellent care of clients and I always have my work done correctly and on time. Boss still treats me unfairly, but I’m not going to worry about it. I know my work ethic and the value I bring and if the time comes I’ll take my talents elsewhere :)
Dr. Ana has a video (posted in 2023) where she talks about black & white thinking. In the video, she encourages a mindset shift away from thinking in extremes like "always" and "never". You might find that video helpful as well.
@ I am aware that some people over- and misuse “always” and “never” and in this case, my statements are true. My boss indeed always finds a negative interpretation to every word I say. My work is actually always done correctly and on time.
Your channel is flourishing, your wisdom nourishing.
god bless everyone trying to work on themselves
It's always been my biggest pet peeve when therapists and psychiatrists tell me to do self affirmations, especially in my group outpatient--I felt unbelievably stupid doing them with everyone and couldn't understand how it's supposed to work for people
Guess I needed a different perspective! I think back on situations I've been in and realize that I do trust the way I acted. Some things that I've been conditioned to believe really just were projections of others (which was obvious to everyone else but me ofc)
Thank you for the video! subbed
This is why my mom thinks im arrogant for questioning what my doctors(everyone) say, like im sorry they just dont know what the hell they talking bout sumtimes, with that said theyre perspective is *they're perspective* and mine is mine it makes taking advice a lot easier
These are the most accurate advices I’ve ever heard.
All the infos here I’ve heard abt before in several places, you did a great job putting them all in one video and explaining them!
As soon as you mentioned hospotality, I was like, here we go 💀 been there sis
I really liked this advice, quite different from the typical you mentioned at the start of the video. I sometimes worry when I'm trying to boost my self esteem I might delude myself or start being egotistical. Your suggestions, I feel, will still keep me grounded.
Unrelated but I love your pfp
Your hair always looks AMAZING! 🥰
Ana, a best friend accused me of being mean when I was offering a different perspective. I did take it into consideration. It hurt because of how untrue it was, not because she was right. Thank you for this.
I really needed this especially since i have been feeling more isolated these days
I just LOVE how you call out positive affirmations, manifesting. More experts like you should call out that new-age stuff👏🏼
I’ve never had great self esteem, but it’s a lot worse now I’m in my 30’s.
Ive lost two jobs within the space of 3 months because I was essentially told that I wasn’t good enough. The manager from the one job told me to ‘pretend to be someone else’, as you can imagine this has had a very negative impact on the way I feel about myself, even though I know I didn’t do anything wrong.
That's messed up but remember you're worthy of better and how people see you is none of your business. It's their interpretation that comes from their internal psyche for better or worst. It's not fact.
I appreciate this video so much! It was affirming realising that I’ve subconsciously gotten better at disagreeing with people respectfully after my goal to be truer to myself this year ❤
This video will be on repeat every week for me. Thank you.
Every people pleaser should watch this video. This was awesome!
I always feel like Dr. Ana is always speaking directly to me. Thank you sis for all the work you're doing and sharing your wisdom and knowledge with us. ❤
Love the way you speak .. calmly and soothingly in details like you really want to explain something in which you believe, and unlike others who seem to be in a hurry always! Also you dont use fillers! Love it 💕like honey to my ears✨
This channel is helping me in so many ways. Thank you, Ana.
OMG THIS EXACTLY THE VIDEO IVE BEEN WAITING FOR ! Thanks dr.Ana
Thank you Ana, this is so helpful
Struggling with self awareness...many people don't even know that concept. Yet is Number One for a healthy life! 🌿
I would say I'm decently selfless, almost to the point where I think it's a little selfish. And I think the idea of not being able to keep a promise to yourself will inevitably ruin the promises that you want to make to others helped made me realize why I should be more of a self advocate, instead of being a people pleaser.
I love your videos so much, every time you post and i see the thumbnail i know i have a really good video to watch and its just the best feeling, your channel is a source of comfort and a safe space for introspection for me
Im always excited and awaiting in cheerful support of the next video you upload
Hey Ana, been listening to you for a few years now but this is one of the most memorable and I think will have a huge impact on my life. Thank you!
Your videos are so real!😊
Speaking up against my first bullies, my parents, helped a lot. I always thought that it's my duty to accept them whatever they do. Pretend everything is at least acceptable. It wasn't. For years I was treated like shit and did nothing about it. Speaking up was uncomfortable as fuck but deep down I knew nothing else matters as much as this. Because nothing else hurts as much as your parents hatred.
Ive waited all my life for this advice
You’ve got to have courage. If it’s your first time asserting yourself, it’s going to take a hell of a lot of courage and this cannot be avoided. You’ve got to make that step for yourself
You remind me of my self-esteem support group and self-help books! Your advice is way better than affirmations!
Aw thank you for this ❤☺️ Very well said :) It was especially the last tip for me that was insightful. I believe I’m quite assured but I saw this video show up & immediately wanted to hear what you had to say, thank you for its advice ✨
Hair looking BEAUTIFUL in this
A senior colleague at work doesn't like me. He gets mad at me for doing anything, even when it's exactly what he wanted. The sad thing is he was super cool in the beginning and I even had a crush on him because he was so cute. Any slight hiccup and he loses it but when I do a decent job he pretends I don't exist. Sometimes we idolise people because we feel attracted by whatever it is they have and then we let ourselves get run over not realising the other person is not perfect and that inperfection can be at our expense.
His is super helpful, thanks. I appreciate your channel so much.
Great video! I’ve been having conversations with friends on how to build self esteem and the process looks different for everyone, so this video came at the right time. Will definitely share this video with them.
*side note* It’s funny how you have “corny” in the title. I wonder if you could explain or get into why we consider things cringe or corny, despite them being healthy or harmless (e.g., the examples you mentioned in the beginning as “corny”)
Sure! I think positive affirmations can feel dishonest for people sometimes because they sound like an overcompensation. No one needs to keep repeating "I am worthy, I am worthy, I am worthy" unless they struggle with self-worth. I think it can feel a bit "the lady doth protest too much" for people. Like when someone goes on a long tangent trying to convince themselves of something they don't even believe to be true.
That being said, speaking to ourselves kindly and positive thinking absolutely can rewire our brains. It just needs to be done in a way that feels honest, not like we're trying to convince ourselves of something we unconsciously don't believe.
@@AnaPsychology Hi Ana, I thought positive affirmations were to help re wire our usual negative ways of thinking?
I was struggling with it atm and I am happy to see that u posted this video
This was so incredibly helpful and insightful thank you for your work!
Thank you i really needed this rn
Thank your for another great video, they help me stay grounded whenever I feel unsure
This is off-topic, but your long hair always looks so amazing
Great advice = self esteem is being the best version of yourself. Fr fr #3 Ana dropping jewels 💎 keep UP the good work.🙃😎✌️
Moral of the video: that awareness that just read this is the only thing thats gonna be with u for ur whole life, LOVE IT.
Theres a lot of tips in this and all are so valuable but u gotta take the time to apply the ideas as ur own, otherwise its a "do what others do" cycle. I think at least
Thank you for this video!
Wow the bots and the "Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki" comments, there's so many
when i visited polynesia , i caretaked for a tiger , her were so little at that time. your sweet photo made me remember 💕💕💕
love ur hair here!
Really good video Anna. Thanks 🙏
Great advice as always ❤❤❤❤
Great video Ana!
Turns out I don't have an issue with self esteem. Friend or not, I'm an arbiter of truth. It doesn't mean being loud or a jerk. If you do it with grace and civility, you'll only lose friends that aren't good for you, weed them out. I think ppl know if I don't agree with them, my stance with them doesn't change unless it's extreme and if that's the case, 95% of ppl wont get along with the individual and if you get to close to that opinion be prepared to be tarred with the same brush. Ppl are welcome to their opinions and to attack someone on it, gives them defensive resistance to change their opinion in the future, doing everyone a disservice
What if someone has a value system based on achievement? For example, earning a lot of money or being the best at something that is typically very difficult to achieve. Sometimes it is literally impossible to achieve the goal. How does one address the values-to-self-esteem problem in that case?
Tell them to like themselves all the time, win or lose. Self-esteem is a necessity for survival, not an honor you earn by high achievement!
I agree with how Dr. Ana put it as Tip #5/external validation around timestamp @9:54 - if our self-esteem fluctuates based on how we place in some external competition or trying to impress or please other people, then that's not a grounded form of self-esteem. Trusting that we're enjoying the process of mastering new skills and growing personally by taking on fulfilling challenges might be a better "value" to try aligning with. It matters most how we feel about ourselves, win or lose, exceptional or still learning.
I love the tab picture/art (?idk what it's called)
Affirmation guy and the "mind blown"/mental math looking background
It’s called a thumbnail.
this is so true for manifesting generators
thank you🧡
10:53 too true
great video
Thank you for the video :)
I'd say some of these depend on context. I hold controversial philosophical and political convictions, I would not get very far in my social reconstruction if I openly stated my political or philosophical perspective on any currently debated issues outside of very, very specific book clubs.
Interesting perspective!
And a very good way of healing too!
tips to boost your self esteem, as a man:
have lots of money from your parents
have good genetics
mixing this two gives you confidence and women
women bring more confidence and more women
enjoy the infinite loop of self esteem
I have to admit my red flag radar goes up when someone talks about their value being beauty and then giving advice about self esteem.
Making a jump to… I didn’t realize they just had Botox seemed like it came out of nowhere.
I have a parent with a sun allergy. It’s photosensitive skin, not really an allergy. I think it’s called that because where ever their skin is hit with UV radiation they break out into itchy hives.
If someone didn’t understand what someone meant and it was on their mind that long they would google it.
Pretending you didn’t as a way to give a backhanded insult to a stranger.,. Then talking about others being passive aggressive. It just seems kind of ironic and like a missed opportunity to fix doing that. If it was rare in people it wouldn’t be a problem. It’s a problem because people don’t like to admit they do it….
Being passive aggressive is a gain short term but surprisingly long term it does the opposite and wrecks almost everything for people. It’s like giving your dog a treat whenever it does something wrong.
It's storming where I live and the cat sound at 0:26 made me jump out of bed because I thought my cat was in trouble outside 😅
do u think people with good self esteem never feel embarrassed or doubt? that validation feels good and rejections hurt. i think they still do feel those things but cope better
Relatively new sub here, thanks for the video; would it be wise or feasible for low self esteem ppl to use grey rock towards those they try to please if they're the source of the tearing down they experience?
Was that a cat at 0:20? 😂
you can find some jaguars in argentina and find some tigers in polynesia 💕💕💕
10:40! ❤❤
Interesting I always thought low self esteem was connected to shame
When you said that in general you should trust yourself more, I wish you had a short list of specific questions that someone with low self esteem could ask themselves to see if others critique is valid or not. Your advice could be much more actionable.
Hey Ana! Awesome video! Thank you so much, I really needed this! I was going to ask - I don’t know whether this is really appropriate or in your field of interest but what do you think about what happened in the first round of the Romanian presidential elections? What happened on Sunday kind of captivated the attention of a lot of people, even outside of Romania too, and I’m finding the whole situation really interesting…
@9:18 my promise is to not drink until Christmas Eve...
Could you please share the episode you are talking about? I've never seen the series but I feel like I'd like to watch that episode to reflect on my own situation
I agree with most of it but i think there are givers and takers. Ppl who put others first and ppl who always put themselves first. Accepting ones flaws is also good. Yes I saw you express yourself more not just reading from a book yet it is just groundless opinion if it not backed by research or experience. I am always right because I have a title and a degree doesn't hold. I remember years ago in your doctorate you were not aware of the difference between guilt and shame. It is not a big deal but it is still important in therapy i suppose and it just proves how shallow education is. I know I studied myself and lots of litterature was thrown on us and not everything made sense. And i like smart ppl and you are one of them. But now you try to position yourself as simply knowing because u are a doctor and never give credit to anybody. You went from one extreme to the next.
you need to find book unveiling your hidden potential by bruce thornwood even if it's the last thing you do in life
BIG like
the thumbnail LOL
When someone hates you for no reason….yeah that’s usually what jealousy is about and ego.
Does self esteem matters at all? Mine was always extremely low and even now I can't completely get off the feeling of hating myself, but what helped me was not boosting it but accepting the fact that I might be an awful unlikeable and incompetent person and live with it
Like I still view myself like this but it cripples my mental wellbeing a lot less
Actually I think all my attempts to boost it made it worse long run, ig I don't respond well to manual attempts to change it
Peter Pettigrew
can you do a video on how to distance yourself from people?
wtf is wrong with these comments 😭😭😭😭
Wtf lol, bots maybe?
Your Beautiful Inside and Out. :)
did you had any self-esteem problem in any part of your life?
just be confident bro
Hi. I am vivek from India. I teach high school students. Your videos really help me understand teenage behaviour and help me motivate my students. Thanks. Is there any social media platform we can connect on so that I may benefit more from your expert advice?
niche picture for the thumbnail
How can I distance myself from myself?
Restaurant lady sounds like a vampire 😂
1:30 my girlfriend has low self esteem, when I complement her, I am very specific with nongeneric focuses. "you have wonderful cheekbones like god plucked the full moon from the sky and put half on each side of your face" 12:40 nah easy, screamers are evil people, like who tf flips out on a stranger for any reason?
chat, are positive affirmations corny?
What if I'm the narcissist what do I do
What's corny about positive affirmations?
She never said they were corny. Positive affirmations aren't wrong they just often aren't enough without aligning our actions with our personal values.