I read ninja's terrible new book

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  • Опубліковано 5 жов 2019
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  • Комедії

КОМЕНТАРІ • 16 тис.

  • @Pyrocynical
    @Pyrocynical  4 роки тому +11302

    Install Raid for Free ✅ IOS: bit.ly/Pyrocynical_iOS ✅ ANDROID: bit.ly/Pyrocynical_Android and get a special starter pack 💥 Available only in the next 30 days
    wow look at all these emojis very hip 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

  • @mikk1066
    @mikk1066 4 роки тому +5905

    0:30
    "Can I buy this please?"
    Cashier: "No"
    *video ends*

  • @MJRaymond
    @MJRaymond 3 роки тому +5177

    Ninja's book: step 6 "grow up"
    Ninja: "I guide others to a treasure I cannot possess"

    • @zidani.s6712
      @zidani.s6712 3 роки тому +15

      69 likes

    • @someonetgg
      @someonetgg 3 роки тому +95

      Okay, this comment is actually original.

    • @IIHaseOII
      @IIHaseOII 3 роки тому +90

      "The FUCK did you say to me you little shit!?"

    • @MadCrafter360
      @MadCrafter360 3 роки тому +18

      Your name...it reeks of familiarity...

    • @ab-bq9ub
      @ab-bq9ub 3 роки тому +31

      Ironic.
      He could save others from not growing up, but not himself.

  • @lonecolamarine
    @lonecolamarine 3 роки тому +3114

    "I'm no longer a 25 year old virgin! - Thanks sis, I love you."
    *Waaaait a second....*

  • @silentstrings1896
    @silentstrings1896 3 роки тому +690

    "most gamers rely on electricity"
    I play Solitaire all day with my mates, Tyler Blevins is a liar

  • @bubblebass8498
    @bubblebass8498 4 роки тому +2626

    Pyro: "I never get sponsorships"
    Also Pyro: "HaVE yOU heArD oF RAiD ShAdOw LeGEnDs"

  • @tpgfm
    @tpgfm 4 роки тому +3643

    I am 100 percent sure that Ninja has never read a book in his life

    • @zenstah6888
      @zenstah6888 4 роки тому +110

      How do you think he studied for the 8th grade exam from last year? He's a very good boy at school

    • @Smug924
      @Smug924 4 роки тому +30

      Ricedward did you not get his comment? He was clearly mocking ninja and not defending him

    • @himawari3688
      @himawari3688 4 роки тому +1

      @@eetu54 r/woosh

    • @demkikun7783
      @demkikun7783 3 роки тому

      @@eetu54 :(

    • @neonmangoz
      @neonmangoz 3 роки тому +26

      @@eetu54 You're a FilthyFrank fan, how the fuck can you not understand this basic-ass humor?

  • @NathanTheMan
    @NathanTheMan 3 роки тому +843

    “Why are rich people the most disconnected from reality”
    Mr Beast isn’t even in the same dimension

    • @juliethefoxcoon
      @juliethefoxcoon 3 роки тому +5

      LMAOOOO

    • @EuanWhitehead
      @EuanWhitehead 2 роки тому +33

      What do you think these people would do if they lost all their money and had to live in a one up one down living off 200 quid a week.

    • @namelol.mp4561
      @namelol.mp4561 2 роки тому +19

      @@EuanWhitehead Probably struggle

    • @reboundrides8132
      @reboundrides8132 2 роки тому +16

      @@EuanWhitehead they would probably be like the billions of other people in that situation

    • @EuanWhitehead
      @EuanWhitehead 2 роки тому +9

      @@reboundrides8132 Yea I was more thinking of the earth shattering comedown of once being a millionaire to having to lead a normal life.

  • @giovelascomusic
    @giovelascomusic 2 роки тому +87

    "I finally got to show my skills to the girl of my dreams! She was so impressed, she took me on the spot! I'm no longer a 25 year old virgin! Thanks sis, i love you!"
    That comment had more plot twists than the whole film industry

  • @Benjuicyy
    @Benjuicyy 4 роки тому +2638

    Pyro: "We all know skeletons have no rights"
    *And that's why they all hide in an armor of meat*

    • @johnnylee5226
      @johnnylee5226 4 роки тому +8

      Here before 1k likes

    • @alfredogravy
      @alfredogravy 4 роки тому +37

      Ah...I see you're also an intellectual

    • @nick-sr2zo
      @nick-sr2zo 4 роки тому +3

      pyro 2019

    • @darthnader5745
      @darthnader5745 4 роки тому +3

      Tonight at 3AM: heya, you were talking trash about skeletons, so I'ma give you a bad time

    • @isaacmoraesdornelasdesouza3314
      @isaacmoraesdornelasdesouza3314 4 роки тому +9

      Actually the brain has no rights so it hides in a skeleton of armour which hides in a skeleton of meat.

  • @DolanDark
    @DolanDark 4 роки тому +11178

    Is this book just a bible for gamers

    • @tiack7838
      @tiack7838 4 роки тому +69

      Oh yeah

    • @geendrip
      @geendrip 4 роки тому +19

      Ye boi

    • @dylanm5564
      @dylanm5564 4 роки тому +80

      Hahahahha you didnt get hearted hahaha.i. want to die

    • @revision2406
      @revision2406 4 роки тому +6

      Derlan derk

    • @honkush
      @honkush 4 роки тому +6

      Hey Dolan
      , what are you doing here

  • @muhamedjukic9962
    @muhamedjukic9962 3 роки тому +854

    Raid ad ends at: 2:55 thank me later

  • @yeetmachine1406
    @yeetmachine1406 3 роки тому +444

    I just watched a guy read a book and make it interesting for 20 minutes

    • @crunchylettuce5446
      @crunchylettuce5446 3 роки тому +15

      Most books are interesting tho, depending on your tastes

  • @djdonkeydong133
    @djdonkeydong133 4 роки тому +12127

    UA-cam algorithm: sees the word ninja was used*
    Trending for gaming*

    • @somedood07
      @somedood07 4 роки тому +104

      both your name and picture are perfect

    • @yarek549
      @yarek549 4 роки тому +49

      heyy u got the same pf as me

    • @Quackenson
      @Quackenson 4 роки тому +3

      #5 baybeee

    • @cumeyesteve8406
      @cumeyesteve8406 4 роки тому +1

      Why do video game companies keep sponsoring people and not making them anything in game. Like if it was a foot ball team they would atlest at the logo.... Kinda shady.

    • @willwym
      @willwym 4 роки тому

      Da Bois got 369mill subs👌

  • @nightrocc3997
    @nightrocc3997 4 роки тому +5213

    Pyro: gets sponsored
    Also Pyro: Insults his viewers while advertising

    • @sawyer7256
      @sawyer7256 4 роки тому +289

      we insult him so it's only fair

    • @DeusJudexMeusEst
      @DeusJudexMeusEst 4 роки тому +90

      "what are you waiting for you disgusting filt"

    • @sanssoucilucci
      @sanssoucilucci 4 роки тому +4

      Anidan filt

    • @khazhusky
      @khazhusky 4 роки тому +8

      Is your pic literally Grade A's head colored Grey?

    • @twiggiermango
      @twiggiermango 4 роки тому +1

      Sup night rocc

  • @shrimpfry880
    @shrimpfry880 3 роки тому +304

    "DPI doesn't matter"
    Osu Mouse players: so that was a fuckin' lie

  • @johnsonsarah2983
    @johnsonsarah2983 3 роки тому +23

    "There's nothing worse than knowing you lost a game because your equipment failed you" I've been through that once and there's a hole on my dry wall

  • @Lightning_studios437
    @Lightning_studios437 4 роки тому +2107

    Pyrocynical - Raid Shadow Legends
    Me - Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen
    Double tap screen

  • @consicedisc6961
    @consicedisc6961 4 роки тому +4399

    i like how the exercises were just pyro doing club penguin dances

  • @ThatOneGuyWhoTalks2Much
    @ThatOneGuyWhoTalks2Much 3 роки тому +20

    10:58 I do actually get compliments for being good but way less than kids calling me an aimbotter lol.

  • @yuga5075
    @yuga5075 3 роки тому +10

    15:19 when it cuts to the logan paul apology lmao

  • @depressinocappuccino6193
    @depressinocappuccino6193 4 роки тому +1941

    "8GB of ram is all you'll ever need"
    I've never felt this offended before.

    • @easilyjoe
      @easilyjoe 4 роки тому +154

      YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH RAM (which is actually true)

    • @EnderPlayerTV
      @EnderPlayerTV 4 роки тому +31

      For competetive games it's true though.

    • @easilyjoe
      @easilyjoe 4 роки тому +11

      @@notlNSIGHT yes you are correct

    • @cake2531
      @cake2531 4 роки тому +19

      I prefer to have more than just the game I'm playing open (maybe music in the background in a web browser or something)

    • @theRealChadWarden42069
      @theRealChadWarden42069 4 роки тому +65

      2TB is the minimum

  • @jerrydowling4329
    @jerrydowling4329 4 роки тому +1007

    "I watch Pyro for the plot"
    7:22

  • @ImBored8141
    @ImBored8141 Рік тому +7

    “Don’t stream”
    -Pyro
    Aged well

  • @akunakun123
    @akunakun123 3 роки тому +230

    9:32 proof that pyro groomed ninja

    • @pyroxide8442
      @pyroxide8442 3 роки тому +10

      You do know the allegations were false right

    • @akunakun123
      @akunakun123 3 роки тому +44

      @@pyroxide8442 i know

    • @pyroxide8442
      @pyroxide8442 2 роки тому +7

      @@akunakun123 cool

    • @zuikerou7625
      @zuikerou7625 2 роки тому +2

      @@pyroxide8442 I don’t care if I’m late but the comment you were replying too it’s was a joke and you thinking he thought pyrocynical was a groomer “which of course he isn’t” but the comment was a joke… it’s didn’t mean so seriousness or what so matter and yes I do find you’re comment because you think the person called pyrocynical a groomer even tho he made a comment joking of pyro groom ninja and maybe you will realize it was a joke

    • @zuikerou7625
      @zuikerou7625 2 роки тому

      @Nikos Mavroforos I agree… sorry I just found about this comment (not yours) I meant the person who don’t know the joke and yeah I get you were saying and there many more comments out there that they don’t get the joke or including me 😅

  • @david123883
    @david123883 4 роки тому +3639

    Pyro: *monetized and trending*
    Hmm must be a glitch

    • @MaxKing10
      @MaxKing10 4 роки тому +35

      cause its about ninja and fortnite

    • @thatsjosh2u
      @thatsjosh2u 4 роки тому +7

      My Faded Sanity HES MONETIZED FOR ONCE SHHH

    • @chrysler238
      @chrysler238 4 роки тому +1

      Team Fortress 2 😂😂😂

    • @stefanmadethen5359
      @stefanmadethen5359 4 роки тому +6

      @@MaxKing10 fortnite - rarely advertises (unless it's the new season)
      world of tanks - heavily advertises, along with world of warships
      ??????

    • @despicablyawesome
      @despicablyawesome 4 роки тому +1

      trending in gaming, at that

  • @SethColby69
    @SethColby69 4 роки тому +3358

    pyro : "Download raid shadow legends it's one of my favorite mobile games"
    video ends
    also pyro : deletes app

    • @chf.j4233
      @chf.j4233 4 роки тому +14

      Sellout

    • @Joe-hl2ts
      @Joe-hl2ts 4 роки тому +252

      @@chf.j4233 he's just making money lay off

    • @112523
      @112523 4 роки тому +118

      i have honestly played it for about 2 months tho
      and its not a bad game. too bad the devs think shoving tons of microtransactions in your face whenever you launch it tho.
      wich makes the game worse then it is

    • @112523
      @112523 4 роки тому +54

      and one thing to add to that. the advertised customisation of heroes is shown in a false way.
      you can give them gear but nothing about their looks will change. its just stats
      wich is too bad cuz this game could potentially be pretty damn good

    • @jakob-__-
      @jakob-__- 4 роки тому +48

      Chf.J you do understand this is his job right, he just got his outro song copyrighted and lost a bunch of money, he still needs to live, 3head

  • @samnesium2003
    @samnesium2003 3 роки тому +71

    I swear to god I was about to die laughing when pyro did the shoulder exercises at 7:17 😂

  • @beanis1932
    @beanis1932 3 роки тому +27

    Bruh Ninja doesn't know sh*t about computers and hardware

  • @jessthebenjamin758
    @jessthebenjamin758 4 роки тому +2422

    I tried to skip your Raid Shadow Legends ad, and as a reward, UA-cam gave me a Raid Shadow Legends ad. I’m gonna go toster bath now.

    • @Magst3r1
      @Magst3r1 3 роки тому +13

      did yuo do it.

    • @jessthebenjamin758
      @jessthebenjamin758 3 роки тому +79

      Magst3r yup, hell is great by the way. Eternal torment is actually alot more fun than you’d think.

    • @eagletgriff
      @eagletgriff 3 роки тому +19

      @@jessthebenjamin758 speaking from personal experience?

    • @jbash0824
      @jbash0824 3 роки тому +4

      hyijjkuerhjkuiwhwg67yreukhfsudyrukejt7iyruyrjowiu

    • @keira-renee
      @keira-renee 3 роки тому +7

      jbash08 okay

  • @dstarsdstar7957
    @dstarsdstar7957 4 роки тому +1493

    I love how he calls him ‘Fortnite Ninja’

    • @AdamG1983
      @AdamG1983 4 роки тому +105

      Well it's accurate. He's not a real ninja. Just another dyed-hair soy boy

    • @Geoform187
      @Geoform187 4 роки тому +102

      His full name (forename and surname) is now Tyler "Fortnite Ninja" Blevins. No take backs.

    • @SM1TT3
      @SM1TT3 4 роки тому +11

      Fortnite ninja is the only real God we have.

    • @valeriygold
      @valeriygold 4 роки тому +13

      Soda poppin

    • @alogicalgirloncesaid5140
      @alogicalgirloncesaid5140 4 роки тому +2

      いいえ

  • @cheeseman8316
    @cheeseman8316 3 роки тому +77

    Pyro smelling fat furry farts 3:01

    • @jazy3193
      @jazy3193 3 роки тому

      LOL

    • @thejefrisp8010
      @thejefrisp8010 3 роки тому +2

      I usually don't like comments like these but that actually made me 😂

    • @Superstar5_
      @Superstar5_ 3 роки тому +1

      Can we please stop before this gets passè?

  • @Senkei231
    @Senkei231 2 роки тому +29

    You cant lie the fact that pyro does skits for his sponsors is smart it keeps you looking instead of skipping it

  • @ckdkskdhchdhanansh
    @ckdkskdhchdhanansh 4 роки тому +2797

    God: “let there be light!” “ *but first a word from our sponsors raid shadow legends* “

    • @futuf2265
      @futuf2265 4 роки тому +63

      Before I leave a comment here let's talk about today's sponsor, Raid: Shadow Legends. Raid: Shadow legends is the most ambitious RPG of 2019, click the link in the description to gain 50.000 silver, what are you waiting for?

    • @estheay3611
      @estheay3611 4 роки тому +34

      Mr F before I reply to your comment, let’s talk about today’s sponsor, Raid: Shadow Legends. Forget everything you know about mobile RPGs,

    • @projektgeronimo2696
      @projektgeronimo2696 4 роки тому +25

      Before liking your comment, let me about Raid Shadow Legends. It's the only RPG game you ever need.

    • @lauriestern3436
      @lauriestern3436 4 роки тому +20

      @@projektgeronimo2696 I love your comment but before I tell you what I like about it let me tell you first about R A I D S H A D O W L E G E N D S

    • @michellebautista6625
      @michellebautista6625 4 роки тому +11

      Before I reply with a totally original comment, let me talk about 𝓡𝓐𝓘𝓓 𝓢𝓗𝓐𝓓𝓞𝓦 𝓛𝓔𝓖𝓔𝓝𝓓𝓢

  • @sugasnaps
    @sugasnaps 4 роки тому +638

    "Ninja's brand-new novel: A Gamer's Manifesto" dramatic reading by a lesbian with daddy issues

    • @mattsboringlife8346
      @mattsboringlife8346 4 роки тому +16

      sugasnaps
      “Lesbian with daddy issues” nice

    • @prod.shammy3292
      @prod.shammy3292 4 роки тому +1

      He does look like one ngl

    • @koltjay1701
      @koltjay1701 4 роки тому +1

      Yeah before I clicked on the vid I thought it was a lesbian at first until I heard his voice ngl

    • @sselfless
      @sselfless 4 роки тому +1

      roasty toasted

    • @rewindoffical5280
      @rewindoffical5280 4 роки тому +1

      UrMomGey no u

  • @romanulvasi
    @romanulvasi 2 роки тому +3

    How I stay hungry:I dont eat

  • @Flame-rp6yq
    @Flame-rp6yq 3 роки тому +11

    "talk about the current president"
    Americans: *already at your doorstep with pitchforks and torches like its 1693*

  • @peaches3515
    @peaches3515 4 роки тому +9727

    i’m convinced that the 5 million downloads are just the youtubers who get sponsored to promote raid

    • @blankd5179
      @blankd5179 4 роки тому +421

      Raid saving all the youtubers careers

    • @infinity_5157
      @infinity_5157 4 роки тому +55

      The game is pretty good tho

    • @blankd5179
      @blankd5179 4 роки тому +620

      @@infinity_5157 your sponsored by raid arent you no one would say that willingly

    • @Ben-xz3bo
      @Ben-xz3bo 4 роки тому +150

      Young_Nut Busta it’s shit it has no skill involved

    • @Davtwan
      @Davtwan 4 роки тому +154

      Not Today - I’m convinced that a lot of them thought it was good at first until they hit their first roadblock that would either require a lot of dedication or a lot of cash. It’s the classic Gacha trap. They make it appealing and relaxing for the first 10-15% of the game, then players hit their first major obstacle due to struggling in whatever place has the new tier of resources they need to advance to the next milestone.

  • @cormalan9894
    @cormalan9894 4 роки тому +5669

    This has to be pyro’s quickest million views ever- he’ll definitely be talking about ninja again

    • @doodlebub
      @doodlebub 4 роки тому +60

      CormAlan IB4 this video gets copyright striked by ninja lol

    • @huangminghui4011
      @huangminghui4011 4 роки тому +6

      lmao not petscop 2 tho

    • @fryyzs
      @fryyzs 4 роки тому +21

      I'm glad he's going back to bullying

    • @w7r443
      @w7r443 4 роки тому +6

      @@doodlebub Doesn't matter, the video is sponsored

    • @whitealliance9540
      @whitealliance9540 4 роки тому +3

      Damn. Sad that all you got from the vid is his money making aspect.

  • @asopher
    @asopher 3 роки тому +6

    Dude your videos are next next level. How the F do you do them so well 🤣 editing and comedic timing on things is top notch. Bravo

  • @Jequetepeq
    @Jequetepeq 3 роки тому +11

    16:04 Let's face it, gaming can get a bad reputation, Chances are you've heard something about how gaming makes you (ad plays) cheetos flaming hot

  • @mariecakeantoinette437
    @mariecakeantoinette437 4 роки тому +1438

    Pyrocynical: *Has four phones*
    Also Pyrocynical: *Still has no car*

    • @FH4Player6397
      @FH4Player6397 4 роки тому +86

      Still no petscop 2

    • @Hallwo_333
      @Hallwo_333 4 роки тому +6

      Priorities

    • @austonmiller5728
      @austonmiller5728 4 роки тому +9

      Pyro: has four phones
      Also pyro: still hasn't made petscop 2

    • @pineapple7024
      @pineapple7024 4 роки тому

      Randy Marsh
      He pays for public transit, you silly sausage

    • @igbinedion6410
      @igbinedion6410 4 роки тому +4

      @@pineapple7024 sausage can mean many things
      be careful

  • @ZanderPanda88
    @ZanderPanda88 4 роки тому +764

    Pyro: *Uses four phones for an ad*
    Also Pyro: *Owns zero cars*

    • @pkheretic1945
      @pkheretic1945 4 роки тому +17

      Tbf cars are way to expensive to keep and considering he lives in London he don’t need one

    • @KaiserDaChoom
      @KaiserDaChoom 4 роки тому +5

      @@FatfighterXD1 yea sames in australia, if you live in sydney or any main city you dont need a car because theres like a thousands buses, but if you live anywhere outside the boundaries of a city a car is needed because the distance between suburbs and other cities is big

    • @DownloadsPassion
      @DownloadsPassion 4 роки тому +4

      Juan Cortez Muro fuck off bitch

    • @wannabeproductors5166
      @wannabeproductors5166 4 роки тому

      Alexander Papadopoulos well the phones cost like 2 dollars so

    • @bazookajoe200
      @bazookajoe200 4 роки тому

      bro, phones are no where near as expensive as cars

  • @notausername69
    @notausername69 3 роки тому +9

    I love when youtubers sarcastically promote their sponsors, it's like they get the money and not sell out at the same time

  • @jarcophagus
    @jarcophagus 2 роки тому +9

    This book feels like it’s an instruction manual on how to get called a bunch of slurs online.

  • @EggnogRaptor
    @EggnogRaptor 4 роки тому +2171

    "8 GB is all the RAM you'll ever need."
    *laughs in modded minecraft*

  • @lry1368
    @lry1368 4 роки тому +4043

    Pyro is part of the only youtubers that insults their sponsors.

    • @youssefkandeel3667
      @youssefkandeel3667 3 роки тому +264

      Internet historian.

    • @martyshrekster
      @martyshrekster 3 роки тому +122

      @@youssefkandeel3667 The only dialysis you need is RAID: SHALLOW LEGIONS

    • @zedaddy3530
      @zedaddy3530 3 роки тому +7

      HeyZeus

    • @quoan0736
      @quoan0736 3 роки тому +191

      Pyro and internet historian are just competing to see who can make the most sacarstic sponsorship segment without losing the sponsor

    • @cloud9s266
      @cloud9s266 3 роки тому +5

      Lolry your profile picture is belle delphine lol

  • @bigj7864
    @bigj7864 3 роки тому +6

    "25 hours a day"
    - Pyrocynical

  • @zlauzl91
    @zlauzl91 3 роки тому +9

    Skip raid ad 2:53

  • @scrimblo5845
    @scrimblo5845 4 роки тому +1152

    When I heard “how I stay hungry” I thought he meant literal hunger and was trying to explain how he manages to eat 5000 calories in every stream

  • @BassMaster.454
    @BassMaster.454 4 роки тому +3179

    "Its the most ambitious mobile game of all time."
    Every one: skip

    • @Ali-oh2bq
      @Ali-oh2bq 4 роки тому +43

      KINGU CURIMSON

    • @GoldInk-ds5up
      @GoldInk-ds5up 4 роки тому +11

      @@Ali-oh2bq KING CRIMSON

    • @jaimeg309
      @jaimeg309 4 роки тому +9

      King Crimson

    • @speckle5474
      @speckle5474 4 роки тому +9

      KING CURIMSUNN!

    • @SnoopySnoo
      @SnoopySnoo 4 роки тому +9

      pyro is the only youtuber i feel has interesting ad reads

  • @danielmcmahon6194
    @danielmcmahon6194 3 роки тому +3

    7:19 my mans cant be walking round with dat bakers dozen and not expect me to want a slice

  • @djimonstewart3400
    @djimonstewart3400 3 роки тому +9

    Who going though pyros old videos after after hearing about the news

    • @danibalistic_uwu672
      @danibalistic_uwu672 3 роки тому

      What news?

    • @bouncycastle3714
      @bouncycastle3714 3 роки тому

      @@danibalistic_uwu672 he groomed a 15 year old

    • @ShaneLee3292
      @ShaneLee3292 3 роки тому

      @@bouncycastle3714 well no he didn't groom but he had sexual messages that were disgusting with a 15 year old

    • @waffles1042
      @waffles1042 3 роки тому +2

      @@ShaneLee3292 he only found out when ivory was 16, which is the legal age in both their countries.

    • @Ignacyjablonski12
      @Ignacyjablonski12 3 роки тому

      did you watch the response video? he proved that he didn't know his age

  • @bruhmoment3536
    @bruhmoment3536 4 роки тому +1206

    "Time to overuse this joke!"
    *The CEO of gay (TM) 3019*

    • @robertsmalls2293
      @robertsmalls2293 4 роки тому +25

      Excuse me sir, I’m a lawyer commenting from the year 3019, and I represent the interests of Gay (TM) and because you neglected to use the trademark (TM) in Gay (TM) your great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandchildren are now being sued for your negligence. Good day, and please be more mindful of the law.

    • @albinozebra276
      @albinozebra276 4 роки тому +4

      gay is good, all the time.

    • @flavor289
      @flavor289 4 роки тому +5

      all the time, gay is good.

    • @Rex-ru5ns
      @Rex-ru5ns 4 роки тому +1

      UA-cam: I’m about to demodetize this mans career

    • @theflano23
      @theflano23 4 роки тому

      @@flavor289 gay the time, all is good.

  • @humongousbrainman5920
    @humongousbrainman5920 4 роки тому +970

    When ninja beats a kid up and throws him down the stairs
    “GET GOOd kheD”

  • @gregthemoron
    @gregthemoron Рік тому +3

    "I'm not a 25 year old virgin anymore! Thanks sis!"
    *Sweet Home Alabama*

  • @localdeer1171
    @localdeer1171 3 роки тому

    i love how it's pretty much the default font in every book editing software as well. 11/10

  • @kenmoops7547
    @kenmoops7547 4 роки тому +662

    "Why do I have chronic neck pain, Doctor?"
    *MAY I INTEREST YOU IN FORTNITE NINJAS HANDBOOK?*

    • @Geoform187
      @Geoform187 4 роки тому +10

      I think that the most appropriated cure to your chronic neck pain will be *Ninja's essential gamer exercises,* please consider the following.

    • @jacksonpercy8044
      @jacksonpercy8044 4 роки тому +5

      Pyro has clearly never heard of Dr. Levi the gaming doctor

    • @TheCarpenterUnion
      @TheCarpenterUnion 4 роки тому +1

      But for real, this seems like a book that should probably have been reviewed by doctors and psychologists

    • @kenmoops7547
      @kenmoops7547 4 роки тому

      @EXPLODING LLAMA thanks, I'll change it now :)

  • @randomguy123playsgames
    @randomguy123playsgames 4 роки тому +834

    “I feel like I’m reading a leaflet from a guy trying to sell me weed”

    • @Pabelotski-yi9zu
      @Pabelotski-yi9zu 4 роки тому +8

      *trying to legalise weed*

    • @elite943able
      @elite943able 4 роки тому +1

      Ha ha weed cool weed cool wow im smoking a weed 420

    • @Fat-Jim
      @Fat-Jim 4 роки тому +1

      @Jon Boy I bet my wife because she interrupted me playing bookworm adventures deluxe to tell me dinner was ready. I personally don't see your point though

  • @TheOneGuyAce
    @TheOneGuyAce 3 роки тому +5

    Pyro: gets sponsored by raid
    His subscribers: you have become the very thing you swore to destroy

  • @rxkovi
    @rxkovi 8 місяців тому

    i love your videos so much thank you so much pyro i was in tears two seconds ago but you make everything so much better

  • @geniusvideo2670
    @geniusvideo2670 4 роки тому +2231

    this sounds like an essay that a 12-year-old wrote when the teacher assigned you to write an informational essay

  • @harold642
    @harold642 4 роки тому +1311

    Pyro: These kids play video games 25 hours a day.
    Harvard university: Write that down

    • @jacket2425
      @jacket2425 4 роки тому +19

      No, *WRITE THAT DOWN!!!! WRITE THAT DOWN!!!!!!*

    • @superstargames9908
      @superstargames9908 4 роки тому +3

      No No no, he's got a point

  • @gddiggy3828
    @gddiggy3828 3 роки тому +18

    "Plays Cyberpunk once..."
    I guess I'll know how to blow up in more ways than one huh?

  • @LynamUpProductions
    @LynamUpProductions 3 роки тому +1

    Ninja: 8GBS OF RAM IS ALL YOU NEED
    Person trying to edit together game clips together in Adobe Premiere: *Loads Deagle*

  • @geertyboyfilms2721
    @geertyboyfilms2721 3 роки тому +1947

    I love how passive aggressive pyro can be when talking about his sponsors

    • @josephkony3993
      @josephkony3993 3 роки тому +35

      it was all sarcasm lmao

    • @sarc143
      @sarc143 2 роки тому

      @@josephkony3993 bro what?

    • @josephkony3993
      @josephkony3993 2 роки тому +4

      @@sarc143 I don't know

    • @phud420
      @phud420 2 роки тому +68

      It's hilarious how he has blatantly made fun of Raid in every single ad read he's done for them but they still sponsor him after

    • @gorbonfree8245
      @gorbonfree8245 2 роки тому +11

      @@phud420 he's still promoting them, shit promotion is amazing promotion. for example, you know those bad mobile ads? yeah they're purposefully made to be horrible because of this reason:
      btw this is from the pyro video called 'Someone illegally put me in a mobile ad' by pyro as well
      I doubt anyone is gonna read it, but I have visited a b2b ad conference in Eastern Europe this Autumn and sat through a speech by the guys who made the pin pull ads for a game shown in this video. It's a 4 person team from Eastern Europe. They presented how they are making these ads, like solely the technical aspect of it. But when they finished with the presentation, a guy from the audience asked them "Why?". Like, why do you make those. What's the logic behind it all if the game doesn't look anything like the ad, etc. You know. All the normie questions Pyro has in this video. I remembered the reply nearly verbatim because it seemed really funny. "We see the ads mission a success after three steps were met. 1. The user gets frustrated with the poorly solved puzzle and downloads the game to solve it. 2. User finds out game doesn't even feature the pin puzzles like in the ad and looks nothing like it. The user then enters the FRUSTRATION PHASE and usually leaves a bad review. However in 60% of cases the game is not uninstalled due to the user being distracted by something (for example writing the bad review, or like getting a phone call). 3. When the user gets bored in a couple of days and wants to play a game on his phone his frustration phase is long since over and he probably doesn't even remember that the ad he was frustrated about was linked to this game he now has installed, in most cases he doesn't even remember where he got the game on his phone, so he starts playing it and 5% of those users become paying customers which is more than enough to pay 500% of the ad budget back to the company. "
      - Артём Дубравин

  • @nekomancer1495
    @nekomancer1495 4 роки тому +931

    i like how he holds the ninja book like a bible
    he even quotes it like one

  • @RealGeorgeWashingtonFr
    @RealGeorgeWashingtonFr 3 роки тому +3

    “I know some of you are seven”
    *shows a picture of a twelve year old*

  • @siwyktos3928
    @siwyktos3928 2 роки тому +2

    To do 360° spin i need to move mice across desk like 3 times

  • @austin5809
    @austin5809 4 роки тому +709

    Another victim lost to the void of Raid: Shadow Legends...

  • @MCmikelmax
    @MCmikelmax 3 роки тому +2803

    okay legitimately the “warm up” exercises that ninja shows in this book are just for people with neck/shoulder pain. i know this because i did physical therapy for that and they recommended those same exercises.
    so basically ninja is a scrawny fucker like me that doesn’t work out so his shoulder blades grind against his spine lmao

    • @concept5631
      @concept5631 3 роки тому +19

      Huh, neat.

    • @flocz5655
      @flocz5655 3 роки тому +92

      6dig-S 61 Sorry, but it would actually be your scapulae grinding against your rips and rather moving away from your spine as a result of a hypertense pectoralis and protracted shoulders. And if u work out the wrong way it can get even worse, thats why push-ups are actually bad for that posture and exercises for strenthening should focus on the outward rotation of the shoulder and the straightening of the back.

    • @flocz5655
      @flocz5655 3 роки тому +19

      So not even that did he present correctly.

    • @MCmikelmax
      @MCmikelmax 3 роки тому +7

      Flo Cz yeah i’m no doctor lol. interesting that push ups would make it worse

    • @MCmikelmax
      @MCmikelmax 3 роки тому +9

      I like Birds i’m totally calling it if the dude just listed off exercises he has to do for his own problems lmao

  • @charliejones3272
    @charliejones3272 3 роки тому +7

    0:58 I thought your dad was in prison, get your story straight!

  • @blindclock3961
    @blindclock3961 3 роки тому +9

    we all know that part with mothers is just pyrocynical wanting an excuse to look at women, we're onto you pyro.

  • @bingham392
    @bingham392 4 роки тому +354

    My Nan’s legs when she’s at the top of the stairs:
    I’m not seeing enough movement

  • @samzterr7800
    @samzterr7800 4 роки тому +908

    UA-camrs: *exists*
    Raid shadow legends: ”it’s free real estate”

    • @xianeli8473
      @xianeli8473 4 роки тому +31

      People: exist
      This dead format: used

    • @zerfixxz
      @zerfixxz 4 роки тому

      Up vote
      Give this kid a metal

    • @zerfixxz
      @zerfixxz 4 роки тому

      @@xianeli8473 ikr

    • @weirddudecastillo7280
      @weirddudecastillo7280 4 роки тому

      bro change ur name

    • @declanedmison5442
      @declanedmison5442 4 роки тому +2

      FV4034 Challenger 2
      No one:
      This dead format:
      No one:
      This dead format:
      No one:
      This dead format:
      No one:
      This dead format:
      No one:
      Ok I’ll stop now

  • @blue_the_duke
    @blue_the_duke 3 роки тому +23

    I actually like the way Pyro handles sponsors. They are a lot of fun to watch.

  • @MrSimplyPut
    @MrSimplyPut Рік тому +3

    I've never read a book that used the word "literally" outside of dialogue. It makes sense that Ninja was the one to do it

  • @Dakayto
    @Dakayto 4 роки тому +1235

    Giving this book to someone would be the greatest roast of all time

  • @theresarayner5726
    @theresarayner5726 4 роки тому +1371

    Hitler: Um unseren Traum zu beginnen, müssen wir Polen erobern! Aber zuerst ein Wort von unserem Sponsor: Raid Shadow Legends

    • @Techn1kal
      @Techn1kal 4 роки тому +106

      Das heutige Video wird von Raid Shadow Legends gesponsert, einem der größten mobilen Rollenspiele des Jahres 2019, und es ist völlig kostenlos! Derzeit haben sich in den letzten sechs Monaten fast 10 Millionen Benutzer Raid angeschlossen. Es ist eines der beeindruckendsten Spiele seiner Klasse mit detaillierten Modellen, Umgebungen und flüssigen Animationen mit 60 Bildern pro Sekunde! Alle Champions im Spiel können mit einer einzigartigen Ausrüstung angepasst werden, die Ihre strategischen Stärken und Fähigkeiten verändert! Die Dungeon-Bosse haben einige lächerliche Fähigkeiten und es macht viel Spaß, die perfekte Party und Strategie zu finden, um sie zu überholen! Derzeit hat Raid mit über 300.000 Bewertungen fast eine perfekte Punktzahl im Play Store! Die Community wächst schnell und die mit Spannung erwartete neue Funktion für Fraktionskriege ist jetzt live. Vielleicht finden Sie sogar meinen Trupp da draußen in der Arena! Mit dem Tarifprogramm für neue Spieler ist es jetzt einfacher als je zuvor. Sie erhalten eine neue tägliche Login-Belohnung für die ersten 90 Tage, die Sie im Spiel spielen! Also, worauf wartest Du? Gehen Sie zur Videobeschreibung, klicken Sie auf die speziellen Links und Sie erhalten 50.000 Silber und einen kostenlosen epischen Champion als Teil des neuen Spielerprogramms, um Ihre Reise zu beginnen! Viel Glück und wir sehen uns dort!

    • @therealplaguerat
      @therealplaguerat 4 роки тому +132

      I wish I knew German

    • @christianmeile1466
      @christianmeile1466 4 роки тому +17

      Bein a Lil edgy Arent we

    • @No-zl3ui
      @No-zl3ui 4 роки тому +10

      Charlemagne schön wäre es ne?

    • @lestatsgirlypop
      @lestatsgirlypop 4 роки тому +3

      @@uselesspotato6536 ok boomer

  • @JimbobsTransportVideos
    @JimbobsTransportVideos 3 роки тому +5

    So guys we did it .. we avoided getting sent to Brazil over somebody’s fake drama

  • @user-jp8rh6ts6m
    @user-jp8rh6ts6m 2 роки тому +1

    this is legitimately the funniest ninja video i’ve ever seen

  • @dimly2002
    @dimly2002 4 роки тому +611

    “Why are rich people the most disconnected from society” just you wait pyro....

    • @Mj4life1230087575
      @Mj4life1230087575 4 роки тому +11

      I feel like this comment had no substance in it tho. While ninja is rich after his massive amount of success, I wouldn't say hes disconnected from the common uh, 'gamer' I guess. What I'm trying to say is that Ninja likes to play videogames and hes talking to other people who like to play videogames. That's pretty connected

    • @boyoncrack313
      @boyoncrack313 4 роки тому +1

      RighteousPurge he’s*

    • @rustywastakenwastaken
      @rustywastakenwastaken 4 роки тому +11

      @@boyoncrack313 shut the fuck up

    • @Max-wc6zy
      @Max-wc6zy 4 роки тому +7

      Shut the fuck up

    • @U.F.O
      @U.F.O 4 роки тому +14

      Fuck the shut up.

  • @medicburdy7791
    @medicburdy7791 4 роки тому +682

    Everyday, Pyrocynical looks more like Gordon Ramsey

    • @lukadinicc2229
      @lukadinicc2229 4 роки тому +21

      Well of course because Ramsay is Pyros father

    • @PaTrick-xl3yq
      @PaTrick-xl3yq 4 роки тому +1

      Right?

    • @Z0r3_00
      @Z0r3_00 4 роки тому +6

      Papa Ramsay

    • @dror2519
      @dror2519 4 роки тому +3

      I don't think Gordon Ramsay is in jail...

    • @jackclarke1220
      @jackclarke1220 4 роки тому +1

      A surprise, but a welcome one to be sure.

  • @designation7395
    @designation7395 3 роки тому +5

    16:12 In Canada that guy writing the leaflet was parliament.

  • @xbox_sign_out2900
    @xbox_sign_out2900 2 роки тому +2

    I need more story time with pyro

  • @Inflake
    @Inflake 4 роки тому +299

    I would be so embarassed to pick up that book in the store

    • @jackqueslack2339
      @jackqueslack2339 4 роки тому +2

      Buy a happy birthday with it. People likely won’t question it.

    • @alwinwinter1645
      @alwinwinter1645 4 роки тому +2

      Well, it's still better than having to buy the Minecraft joke book, full of funny Minecraft jokes written by some five year old that I literally had to pick up

  • @KingoftheKlowns
    @KingoftheKlowns 4 роки тому +489

    "25 hours a day"
    You gotta bump those numbers up, those are rookie numbers

  • @ramanand5187
    @ramanand5187 2 роки тому +2

    Ninja has had the biggest downfall in gaming history

  • @hotchip2153
    @hotchip2153 3 роки тому

    I like how u can see pyros arms about to give out in the first push up

  • @Amarus
    @Amarus 4 роки тому +398

    "I've made a severe" had me dying

  • @ilikelobsters.2376
    @ilikelobsters.2376 4 роки тому +740

    “Skeletons have no rights*
    *that wasnt a really doot move*

    • @samojakoikadnijelako
      @samojakoikadnijelako 4 роки тому +9

      hahahaha thats so funny 😂😂😂😂 can i get updoot 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 get it ? cuz its october and like haloween skeletons scary XDDDD XDDDD

    • @James-lh3sn
      @James-lh3sn 4 роки тому +6

      Hello fellow Reddit user

    • @CH3CKIT
      @CH3CKIT 4 роки тому +2

      Sad calcium noises

    • @skeletonjanitor
      @skeletonjanitor 4 роки тому +2

      @@samojakoikadnijelako calcium hater ewww

    • @piesmuggler7268
      @piesmuggler7268 4 роки тому

      why? why did reddit take doot from us? right before doom eternal.

  • @Curelessss
    @Curelessss 11 місяців тому +2

    This appeared on my recomendations and i thought it was the new video

  • @Noffie
    @Noffie 3 роки тому +3

    2:55 we did it. We reached a quarter of a million subscribers

  • @molls761
    @molls761 4 роки тому +612

    This video is literally pyro reading all the 9 year olds a bedtime story

    • @nightkiller594_6
      @nightkiller594_6 4 роки тому +12

      Obama Gaming it’s 8 year olds not nine because we would be reading to pewdiepies fanbase if it was nine year olds🤔

    • @molls761
      @molls761 4 роки тому +4

      Nightkiller594 _ basically the same fanbase 😳. All of us are big brained

    • @tovarischshashlikov
      @tovarischshashlikov 4 роки тому +7

      hey obama love your gaming videos, cheers mate!

    • @strangerale4196
      @strangerale4196 4 роки тому

      Obama Gaming hi obama i know your last name

    • @subtomycuntt6321
      @subtomycuntt6321 4 роки тому

      Beo

  • @colmpng
    @colmpng 4 роки тому +635

    This book makes me realise how early ninja dropped out of school

    • @JakefromStateFarm292
      @JakefromStateFarm292 4 роки тому +9

      Colm Pickering he dropped out when he was four

    • @user-fz2jb1nw1v
      @user-fz2jb1nw1v 4 роки тому +42

      Colm Pickering bold of you to assume he even went to school

    • @bizzy9829
      @bizzy9829 4 роки тому

      @@user-fz2jb1nw1v bold

    • @mist3325
      @mist3325 4 роки тому +11

      @@user-fz2jb1nw1v bold of you to assume he even grew up

    • @TheMinecraftfreak668
      @TheMinecraftfreak668 4 роки тому +9

      At least he did learn one thing from school: how to have as much words as possible to make a paragraph.

  • @anothersome1552
    @anothersome1552 2 роки тому +2

    I love the rdr2 music when reading the gaming bible lol

  • @voidotter1435
    @voidotter1435 3 роки тому +6

    LOOK AT HIS PIT STAINS!

  • @lando_ch0n748
    @lando_ch0n748 4 роки тому +639

    Pyro: Makes Junji Ito reference
    "Ah I see you are a man of culture as well"

    • @emthejester
      @emthejester 4 роки тому +18

      Oliver Rees junji Ito and red dead 2 , truly a scholar of the world

    • @gregisbased5205
      @gregisbased5205 4 роки тому +5

      Was waiting for this comment

    • @tuvieja1697
      @tuvieja1697 4 роки тому +4

      @Juan Cortez Muro Penis

    • @Gassygastly
      @Gassygastly 4 роки тому +1

      @Juan Cortez Muro ew go away boomer

    • @JoaoRenatoBail
      @JoaoRenatoBail 4 роки тому

      The blade runner 2049 reference is also very much appreciated

  • @igbinedion6410
    @igbinedion6410 4 роки тому +172

    "Skeletons have no rights"
    Do you know what month it is?

    • @sukida.
      @sukida. 4 роки тому +5

      Igbinedion october

    • @igbinedion6410
      @igbinedion6410 4 роки тому +3

      @@sukida. correct

    • @christopherhammond5142
      @christopherhammond5142 4 роки тому +4

      I was staring at this for a worrying amount of time before I understood what you were talking about.

    • @thebluewhale8891
      @thebluewhale8891 4 роки тому +1

      @@igbinedion6410 can I get a sp00kie, scurry skeleton please?

    • @josephtpg7329
      @josephtpg7329 4 роки тому +1

      Yes I do! It’s August!

  • @greaseball8057
    @greaseball8057 3 роки тому +1

    I love how during the entire video its just the house building theme from red dead