Three Signs that ALWAYS Indicate Child Psychological Abuse by a Narcissistic Parent, Part 4
Вставка
- Опубліковано 7 лют 2025
- In his testimony before the Pennsylvania House Children and Youth Committee on Wednesday, November 15, 2017, Dr. Craig Childress discussed the three diagnostic indicators--the "fingerprints"--that ALWAYS show up and indicate child psychological abuse by a narcissistic or borderline parent.
NO OTHER PATHOLOGY IN ALL OF MENTAL HEALTH WILL PRODUCE THIS SET OF THREE SYMPTOMS.
The three signs are as follows:
1. Attachment System Suppression toward a normal-range parent
2. Five narcissistic traits toward a normal-range parent:
a. Grandiose judging of the parent
b. A sense of entitlement from the parent
c. An absence of empathy toward the parent
d. A haughty and arrogant attitude toward the parent
e. A demonization of the parent
3. Trauma Reenactment against the normal-range parent--the child believes he or she is being abused or victimized by normal parenting
Dr. Childress did not specialize in high-conflict divorce, but rather in ADHD and early childhood mental health. When he first ran into Parental Alienation in 2008 and observed the abysmal failure of the legal system and the failure of the mental health system, he was appalled by the absence of professional knowledge and competence in the area. He was so appalled that he shifted his career to try to stop the family destruction that he saw and the parenting practices that were producing pathologies in the children.
For more resources from Dr. Childress, please visit www.drcachildre....
Thank you to Pennsylvania Representative Katharine Watson for holding this meeting and for posting the link to the video online. www.kathywatson...
My favorite quote of Dr. Childress is "Children do NOT reject parents, children who rejected parents were eaten by predators, children do NOT reject parents!"
One of my kids does. She is 15 and really wants a dad, but her biological dad is a stranger to her, even though he always lived under the same roof.
She came to me, a few months after I left her dad, saying she needed time away from dad. Because he was never interested in her, spent no time with her until we divorced. Then he suddenly jumped into behaving as if they had been incredibly close forever, went way overboard telling her about his therapy sessions and, scaring her with getting super offended when she wasn't ready for all that. 😢
The way she describes it, it's like she never had a father, and now some stranger is pretending to always have been her dad. And he's angry with her for not feeling safe and at ease with him. Poor child!😢 we should not say for a 100% sure, that no kid rejects/ pulls away from a parent for a legitimate, reasonable reason.
Sad things is authorities, schools, judges, cps are on the side of the alienating parent.
Michelle 84 they are!!!!!!!
Michelle 84 very true
Unfortunately it's true and That shows their ignorance, I have been dealing with it for many years
Because they're better at telling lies than we are at telling the truth.
That's because they profit from divided families.
Why is this man not recognized for his brilliance????
He is handing our conflicted family courts a solution on a platter.
This man is the only person I know who understands what a targeted parent goes through
why isn't this better established in counseling and school psychology to help the children and other parent? courts should know too
AMEN!!!!!!!
Yes absolutely. I was blamed and accused instead of being helped and my kids being protected
@@angelacote7971 because knowledge is not profitable. They will rather fight and let this continue while enriching themselfves.
My kids mom was exactly this way to me, me having custody of my girls has only made their mom worse
Dr. Childress is an expert. He will go down as a relentless scholar in this protracted struggle to rescue children from psychological abuse.
Dr. Childress seems sincere, but the obvious and common "instinct" to erase the Ex inspired all those Possession ORDERS. Parental Alienation is KIDNAPPING first, effects on kids secondary. That is PARENTS' RESPONSIBILITY.
The children's state of mind does not matter; protect Parental Rights FIRST untill REAL EVIDENCE (from kids' smartphones? Can't record delusions!), not pseudo-science psychology "expert opinion (hearsay) which feeds the Judge's arbitrary ruling that helps assassinate your character in your children's eyes!
When children "adamantly refuse" to see a parent, it PROVES PARENTAL ALIENATION!
Truly abused kids most often still LOVE THEIR ABUSER (statistics).
"Narcissists?" Fad, pop-psychology which will backfire on YOU as name-calling, denigrating your Ex.
You who sit in judgement perhaps have not suffered this Targeted Alienation.
The Alienator most often appears calm and in control.
Children truly abused by a parent OFTEN STILL LOVE THAT PARENT because the mammal instinctual Parent-child bond is that strong. SO VERY STRONG that it takes BRAINWASHING to create Parental Alienation.
Dr. Phil, "Dr." Amy Baker (horrid unindexed "books" sold to lawyers), "Dr " Richard Warchak (promotes Family Bridges THREE DAY "reunification" retreats for $15,000 booked OVER A YEAR IN ADVANCE?!?!!) and even the sincere Dr. Childress practice pseudo-science for $$$$$, and their opinions should not be allowed in Family Courts!
Google "is psychology a science?" Still want to claim "abuse" and let those sharks consume your family in Court?
I have a real science degree, and noticed college kids who fail at real science and math, who want to take something "interesting" instead, choose psychology to become Quacks, pimped by Family Courts for "child-centric" hearsay to influence arbitrary rulings that often further destroy a PARENT IN THEIR OWN CHILDREN'S EYES with stupidities like Supervised Visitation for TEENS with their own friends, driver's licence, knowledge of how to call 911 or even record REAL EVIDENCE on their Smartphone (WHICH NEVER ends up as EVIDENCE proving their delusions as "truth" in Family Court!
HARD to prove fantasy, isn't it?)
Parental Alienation is KIDNAPPING.
Protect Parental Rights through police enforcement of All, even the tiny ones, of the Possession ORDERS.
I lost my teens during Covid Lockdown after EIGHT YEARS of them hiding Drs ' names and school ID numbers, subtext *dad subhuman, dangerous* which did make them perfect children, LOL.
They ignored my mantra "bad relationships have secrets, shame, guilt, and fear" and never gave me the Christmas Dad Evaluation letters I asked for EVERY YEAR!
We targeted parents now can only go to Court with 3 THREE denied possessions, to suffer the "abuse" allegations flying both ways so incompetent Quacks can help Judges further damage our relationships?
Psychologists lije Judges, NEITHER with adequate training, no professional guidelines, no supervision, and NO ACCOUNTABILITY!!!!
Put Parental Alienation into Law as KIDNAPPING and allow police enforcement with tickets, fines, and jail.
Imagine a better Future....
POLICE: "Kids, these documents in your Dad's glovebox say you must share your school IDs and doctors' names with both parents. If you don't, I must write your Mom a ticket. If you further disrespect your father, I will take your mother to jail. Understood?"
Which teaches RESPECT for parents AND the Law, instead of delusional Contempt of Court and permanent SEVERE Life-long Parental Alienation in Teens!
I legally WON, proved perjury, and lost my four teens anyway two years ago (Covid Lockdown enabled the alienation, filed in 2021) the day I filed the Motion to Enforce with 9, NINE denied visitations which FAILED TO CONVINCE even after Judgelette admitted I proved Contempt of Court, thanks to incompetent pseudo-science "psychologists" and an en camera interview with delusional teens!
ALWAYS REQUEST EVERYTHING RECORDED INTO COURT TRANSCRIPTS!!!
My child's "therapist" never talked to me, but called Protective Services instead - never hearing FROM ME about my Ex's DIAGNOSED personality disorder!
Instead, they convinced kids to accuse me of Sexual Abuse with really stupid allegations destroyed in ONE phone interview with me (3 investigations, all allegations dismissed one interview each, but "child-centric" psychology-pimping Judges do not notice!!!)
With Parental Alienation in Law as KIDNAPPING, maybe police will ENFORCE Possession ORDERS and stop Courts from pimping pseudo-science peddling opinion (hearsay) for $$$$ to destroy your family.
Trust me when I say this. This man is brilliant in what he is saying. It is bang on accurate.
My 2 sons are men now (30 &28) and still suffer the actions from my adult children of PAS. Its the most horrible, disgusting, helpless thing I've ever gone through in my life. I still, at times, wake up crying or calling one of my sons names. Going through it with one child is bad enough, never mindv2. I would never wish this on anyone. Ive read books by Amy Baker, Richard Gardner C.A. Childress to name a few, as well as therapy. It helps but they still have their mother (the alienating parent) significantly in their lives. As the literature says,not much chance of any kind of real relationship if this is the case. My eldest and I were doing really well while he was living in NY, as an actor. Due to the pandemic and lack of work, he moved back home with his mother. His behavior resorted right back to when he was living with her fulltime with little change. Our relationship has suffered severely, he barely makes any effort, its 100% me. Their mother thinks everything is fine, now that the child support is over one of the main reason why she leveraged them is gone.. She thinks saying to them: if you want a
relationship with your father, that's you're choice and if you don't that's ok too. You may ask yourself what normal, loving, supporting parent would condone a son(s) not having a relationship with their father? Well, if she put the kids first and displayed the traits just mentioned she may not have alienated my sons from me. She doesn't realize that she taught them for years to hate me, and they know no other behavior. Its like someone ripped half of your heart out, its constantly feeling lonely, helpless, hopeless, and being the eldest of 9, you wld think my siblings would help in any way they can. Nope, I'm lucky if they watch a UA-cam video I send them. I rarely send any but the last one I sent not one person acknowledged receiving it. I guess I'm writing now because itsso hard dealing with this by myself, and that I live in another state from my sons and family as well as being laid off due to the pandemic since April of 2020. I wish the best and my heart goes out to those targeted fathers, mothers, and grandparents
@@russellryan7964
Well said! 😭 May our ALMIGHTY CREATOR heal our broken 💔~
@@russellryan7964 This is the #1 DIRECT TERRORIST THREAT TO HUMANITY!
ua-cam.com/video/-xKgwwAcYyk/v-deo.html
He’s completely dangerous & should not be practicing. So much pathology. Not a disgruntled parent, I’m a peer.
Please could you explain you response as I am very interested in your view
yep, my kid has all these, lol. Remember 9 times out of 10, the targetted parent is the "good parent". Meaning they are respecting normal boundaries. In contrast, the alienating parent is ignoring boundaries, controlling, narcissistic, and using the child.
I agree. The same happened to me.
how have you dealt with it?
are you still married to their other parent? I hope not. my mom is still married to my narcissistic step mom and now i resent my “good parent” even more than my abuser tbh
Hello Ava, at what age in life were you able to realize that one of the parents in your life is a narcissist? It’s hurting to know that the end of a marriage (my marriage) might be the only thing to save me and my children from the mental scrutiny. Tried having faith that things might get better. The other talks about going to counseling, but never has. It hurts to have my family go through this. I feel for the children involved.
My children are adults now and they went through the process described in the video. In fact this video explains a lot and will help me process some very heartbreaking things.
My children still try to get they psychopath parent's love and esteem, which they'll never get obviously, and have treated me in a very abusive and narcissistic way. Including dehumanization, lying, demeaning, manipulating, gaslighting, etc. Very sad.
But I came from a psychopath mother, I just recently dug out all that trauma and I'm still working on it, so I found out that I didn't have good connecting skills. In fact I was raised in such rejection that I never learned to connect at all I had no clue about creating connection. I had no right, even.
I believe this is the missing point. The guy who speaks best about connection and made me discover what I had missed regarding that with my kids is Gabor Maté. I don't agree with everything he says but the parts about connection are very touching and real. I think they can be game changers and life changing.
I'm wishing you all the best, this is such a hard path to have to repair all of this and be both parents for our children. ❤️ @@TT-mb1bl
You are a good man Dr Childress, thank you for your relentless fight in getting PA recognised and hopefully eradicated forever.
Yes! Bless you, Dr. Childress.
I’m just gonna say that it’s whack that in cases like this the courts still try to keep the other parent in the child’s life even when it’s clearly detrimental to their development and overall well being as a human child. Most courts don’t even view Psychological abuse as abuse. Absurd.
Unfortunately, No one cares about the countless of Fathers who are alienated by their children’s mother and the legal system. Nobody ever hears the Alienated parent’s stories…… 😤Continuous prayers going up for all the parents that are dealing with this!🙏🏾
It's for monetary gains by the courts and the States
This man needs to educate DHS and CPS!!
Start advocating for yourself until he can. Show them this, talk to them about how truly abused people show 'Stockholm syndrome" or ALIGN themselves with abusers.
Summary of key points:
Three diagnostic indicators always present with this pathology (cross-generational coalition with a narcissistic/borderline parent) and are not present in any other pathology.
No other pathology in all of mental health will produce these three symptoms:
Symptom 1: Attachment system suppression toward a normal range parent. The child is rejecting a normal range parent. This is attachment pathology, which indicates pathogenic parenting.
Symptom 2: a set of five narcissistic personality traits in the child’s symptom display. The child is showing five specific narcissistic symptoms.
1. Grandiose judging of the parent
2. Sense of entitlement. “The parent is supposed to meet my needs”
3. An absence of empathy for the parent
4. Haughty and arrogant attitude toward the parent
5. Splitting - a demonization of the parent
These are the psychological fingerprints of control on the child by a narcissistic parent. A person cannot control a child without leaving fingerprints of that control. Children are not narcissistic. A child displays these symptoms because the parent is influencing the child. The child is adopting the attitudes of the pathogenic parent toward the normal range parent.
Symptom 3: Victimization. A false trauma reenactment. The child has a fixed and false belief that they are being victimized by the normal range parenting of the targeted parent. That it’s abusive: “I am being victimized because my dad took my iPhone away”
In psychology a fixed and false belief is a delusion. And the belief that a person is being victimized is a persecutory delusion. When this affects only one area of a child’s life it’s called an encapsulated persecutory delusion. The child is acquiring the encapsulated persecutory delusion from the pathogenic parent.
We are lifting the fingerprints of the pathogenic parent from the child’s symptom display.
No other pathology, not even authentic child abuse, will show this set of symptoms. A child never displays a haughty and arrogant attitude toward an abuser. A child never displays a sense of entitlement toward an abuser. Authentic child abuse does not show this set of symptoms.
Three symptoms will always define this pathology. The parent is creating pathology in a child including:
1. Developmental pathology - suppression of normal range attachment bonding motivations (the child is losing a parent)
2. Narcissistic personality traits - the parent is creating a personality disorder in the child
3. A psychiatric delusion in the child
When a parent induces this level of pathology in a child, the DSM-5 diagnosis is V995.51 Child Psychological Abuse, Confirmed
Thank you!
My family has done a wonderful job of corrupting my daughter and this is exactly what I am dealing with as I speak. Its absolutely painful and stressful.
i'm so sorry you are not the only one
I feel your pain. This happened to us
I’m so sorry
Im right there with you! Its horrible
Let's pray 🙏 for each other my daughter is so severely brainwashed ! My heart is broken the mental anguish is unbearable....my son keeps me going as we have joint custody of him I've considered withdrawal of the case and just keep my son because the stress and pain is literally killing me though I know he would probably just file a new case
Thank you from the bottom of my heart Dr Craig Childress! Please help us to stop the destruction of children worldwide!
Absolutely a brilliant distillation! It is hard to believe that children could do this to their own mother, but with a sadistic style narcissist father, it's perfectly clear. Being that it is so hard to believe these twisted outcomes, this is exactly why we need people like this doctor to document and clarify it for us. I hope the APA will take note immediately to add these criteria to their diagnoses and implement appropriate programs for children. It will then (help) stop these horrifying and hellish cycles of abuse.
If anyone needs me to testify for a study, I would be glad to help.
Or foster or stepfather too!
My family is opposite. Narcissistic mother and father who always has to be loyal to her and be complicit
The alienating parent starts with, escalates and garners all the tools before the victims know what is happening. Dr. Childress indicators are great because they unfold the symptoms, the damage and the cause.
The unique approach of Dr. Childress to parental alienation is the only one that can eventually break this common form of child abuse.
Love this! As a child whose been abused by narcissist step parent, mom didn't step in cus she's a fraid of him. The fear he installed inme at a young age to now I'm 34. I never did anything to try and hurt my parents or disrespect them. My disrespect came in years later ehen I realized what damage was done. Coming to the realization that the one abusing me claiming to love me. Could do that. I cried a lot, even seeked therapy for the abuse. Which made me only angry cus I was exhausted from the abuse. Seeking help made me feel safe until I got home. Than it was worse. Don't reach out so someone if you have to go back home to it. Won't end well. Be brave to wait until you can get the opportunity and use that to keep a float when you feel like your drowning in it. Because of the abuse I now am extremely sensitive not to just my feelings. But of others as well. Rather get even and try to cause more harm. I just made it clear that I was smart to know it was abuse. Step dad flipped tried twisting and sabotaging me to convince others I'm autistic and that's why. Autistic or not, I was fully aware ...When he soon realized after I blasted him for it out of defense. He stopped. He mopes, he tries to hush me up with bribery. I said no, It took me until I was 32 to stsnd up to him. To this day he is angry at me for not letting him control me like that. And he's even more angry that I not only said something but I handled it for more maturily showing him yhe exampke of how to properly be towarss my self and others. Felt good knowing all along he was trying to drag me down and I fought it off inspirational things I fed myself daily. He's angry he didn't win. And even more angry I put him in his place. Cus no way a child can put a step parent or anything parent for that matter in their place if they are abusive. It makes them flip their lid pouring more abuse. I pray for those who endured it. Especially when it's not just emotional abuse but physical as well.
True, the abused child is entirely vulnerable. It sounds similar to Stockholm Syndrome.
Thank you. I really needed this. ❤
I have ADHD and my narcissistic mother gaslights me into thinking i’m just being sensitive and need a therapist. It’s always about the her and her husband as if i care
Yup!
I love you whoever u r❤️❤️❤️❤️
No offence , but no one’s more sorry that what she is . She’ll realise what a gift you were to her and you’ll stand up tall one day and her husband will be invisible to her as you shine brightly. Then the poor husband will get her narcassist shit for all the shame she’s gonna feel.
Same here…..😢 can’t say I’m glad to know I’m not te only one
He is so clear and in my experience correct. Why sre the US courts, lawyers, welfare services, teachers and psychologist unable (unwilling) to see the issues?
A lot of narc parents will hate hearing this
PAS can also be done by grandparents in complex family Dynamics.... Third parties can undermine and Target the parent as well and have the same damaging effects.
Amen to that! Third parties can also be 'direct' alienators: grandparents, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, friends of the family, even parents of the child's friends - in most of these 'direct' cases, the alienators have a Cluster B personality disorder (usually NPD or BPD).
But other NON-disordered 'third parties' can also unwittingly contribute towards it (friends of the alienating parent; friends of the alienated children; PARENTS of friends of the alienated children; relatives on both sides; police; therapists/psychologists with no knowledge or training in PA - which is VAST MAJORITY of them; school counsellors, teachers, other school staff; social workers/child protections agencies; any other persons directly or indirectly connected with the child/children ) in the misguided belief that they are 'helping the child'.... and thereby end up playing a VERY major role in the alienation of these children from the target parent.
Parental Alienation - tragically for the children - is COUNTERINTUITIVE. Which means, sadly, that pretty much EVERYONE who involves themselves in the alienation situation who DOESN'T have strong, thorough awareness or training in 'Parental Alienation' is going to get it backwards... TRAGICALLY backwards.
Still, some children ARE able to thwart a parent from alienating them from their other parent. BUT.... very very few children are able to thwart a parent AND 'outside influencers', especially if those outside influencers are 'authorities' (children are taught to respect 'authorities'), or parents of the child's friends (with at least one parent BPD or NPD - been there). Hard not to burst into tears just writing this. "The horror! The horror!" :-(
My dad OBLITERATED the love my son had for me. BRAINWASHED my son to believe I am WORTH LESS than a piee of shit-I kid you not. Who does that to a CHILD? Who does that to anyone? He smiles very proud of what he has done. evil.
You are NOT joking.
My parents alienated my from my children and siblings because my ex remarried and said get rid of your son or you will never see the children.
This is exactly what I’m going through with my mother in law.
i honestly think identifying these people and removing their right to any position of power immediately is how we start to preventing the majority of evils in society.
and how do you enact anything? with positions of power.
who do you think is in those positions of power right now to begin with? yup.
i'll do you one better, who would have thought in the first place to have positions of power and make that idea accepted by everyone so we all think it's natural to have positions of power?
Incredible, it's like he's been spying on my grandchildren. We have seen these indicators, and the grands go to therapy. Accurate description of what they are living.
My son has healed himself and we are trying our best . This video was very helpful . I feel validated . I knew what was happening and I know I was right about him being brainwashed . We have a long road and we are surviving it with love
Thank you for your insight into parental alienation and endeavour to protect innocent children from these despicable child abusers. I fought for 6 years in the family court to protect my three young children from their obsessed parental alienating mother. To no avail. Tragically, the experts, children's lawyer and the system took the mother's side. I haven't seen or heard from my children in years.
I sincerely appreciate Dr. Childress' research into this harmful, deadly behavior of many parents.
I also appreciate how he explained, step by step, how to diagnose this in a child without the need for the DSM to adopt PA or PAS as a "diagnose-able" condition. His methodology allows mental health providers and parents the ability to advocate and truly help children despite the dogmatic reluctance of many judges, politicians and professionals to protect children from alienating parents.
Dr. Childress, you are so absolutely correct in your description of the PD parent forcing the children to accept their distortion of reality. The court system victimized me and my three children, because; they refused to see who was the Abuser in my family. Twenty -five years after a concocted 911 call for domestic violence claim, all false, five hearings and more then 100,000 in legal fees, I took a plea bargain to stop the bleeding..No evidence of any abuse in my home for thirteen and one half years, and yet with no evidence other than her lies, I was removed from my home. She went to a battered women's shelter, with my children, aged four, nine, and ten ..She held them hostage for thirty days, using the shrinks at the shelter to reinforce her distortions of being a victim.For more than 13 months the court refused any visitation. further, visitation was monitored, at my expense of 250 for five hours visitation every other week. I could go on and on, however; suffice to say, my children, all three as adults display every trait as listed above. I can only see and feel the pain my children are in, yet, they will not discuss the event as I tell it. I decided to go non contact with them, as I feel used, cheated, denied, devalued, and deeply shamed.
How do you go on? I have a 15-year-old girl who has been poisoned by her father. Ive known he was a narcissist for many years, but I did not realize he could turn her into one. I am watching this video again, for probably the third time, because I just want to make sure--did he really say that the narcissistic parent is CREATING narcissistic personality disorder in the child? IS there any way to prevent this? My god, I am filled with grief. It's like finding out my child is gone, bitten by a vampire and her whole life stolen by him. Help, please, anyone, please help. Can it be stopped or prevented? I cannot go back into court with these people. I do not have the money to fight them, which is how this happened in the first place.Do I FORCE her to spend time with me per the court order? She really, really hates me at this point, and I cannot imagine that now, spending time with her will be anything but awful. My god, she was so sweet as a young child.
@@Kaagrant I'm SO sorry to hear about yr girl. I can totally relate to yr pain & fears. Family court handed my 2 dear little boys to my ex after he manipulated the police, other agencies, psychologists & finally the judge. All I can say is try to hold onto the love & bond you once shared with yr daughter because it'll be more powerful than anything he has with her. In the end, that's what will bring her back to you. Hugs
The same happened to me. The only thing I am doing is praying and emailing my son this kind of information with the hope that he will realize. Actually his mother just call me after 2 years to ask me stop emailing him. I am happy he is reading my emails and hope that at one point he will react. Hope this helps and always, always pray to God.
Our experiences are virtually the same. It happens over and over again. The books I have read and lectures I have watched are like they were written just for me. The fact is, it is exactly the same way for everyone experiencing PA and these materials have been available for at least 5 years and nothing has changed. When able, I am going to make statements to the leaders of child protection services and government officials and ask that they train staff and follow a testing protocol immediately when there is a child that is rejecting a parent. They still believe it is normal for this to happen and that the abuse narratives are authentic and justify the reaction! So my children went from playing badminton with me in the backyard to hating every bone in my body virtually overnight? Wow! When it is so blatantly obvious to uncover pathogenic parenting with the guidelines that Dr. Childress has set forth but still they do nothing. Then you have to go through your day knowing that every moment that passes sends your children towards the same psychopathology that causes this to happen in the first place and feeling powerless. Narcissism/borderline personality disorders is the disease that we must fight against and keep from being transmitted to the next generation. It is a problem for all of society whether you are experiencing alienation or not, find a way to help fight it.
@@Kaagrant cry out to Jesus, and you will be helped. If it had not been for the Lord my soul would have been alone in hell.
He has moved mountains, not easy but better to trust God than toxic people any day. Sending love and strength to endure.
This exactly what happened to me. My son began to abused me with his father. I don’t even wants to be around him. I feel terrible when I say this. This was twelve years of pure abuse from this two. Run for your life. They accused you of things. They conspired against the parent that wants to do the right thing.
The same happened to me. I had to go out of the country because she will not leave me alone. She called all my family and friends to tell her lies. I think the truth comes out sooner or later.
@@CarlosRodriguez-er4hh was it an accusation without proof?
How are you doing now? I'm so sorry you're going through this pain. My child has visits with his dad who is controlling & aggressive. I've thought about getting a restraining order but don't want to go through court & lawyers again. The "justice system" is unfair. I wonder if dad & our child should even be seeing each other? I don't want to be accused of parental alienation 😣 This is so painful & feels like hell sometimes.. please share your insight. Thank you & God Bless 🕊
Well how old is your son? If he’s not an adult yet there’s most definitely still hope. I know bc i’m the child in my situation and turned against my mom, who was really the good parent of the two. Sadly, for your son, it isn’t until you’re older and out of your parents house entirely that you may begin to heal, because most kids don’t even know they’re being abused. It’s not their fault.
I am going through that with and our oldest daughter he can put his hands on me and not pay bills or take care of everyone else in the family...but when i get direct and out of control yelling sometimes because im just tired and i will admit that I take accountability...but she blames me no matter what...once she graduates and is gone he wont come for for the rest and will leave me alone...he doesntcare about our other 3 cuz they not an athletic star like our oldest daughter and both of our sons have autism so he shows no true interest them...how disgusting and gross 🤮 I had kids with that "man" I am truly disgusted after 18 years and 4 children I get disrespected just because he don't have options cuz he ruined his own life with bad choices and doesn't take any accountability....I take full accountability for not listening to my mom and whole family when they all said they were disgusted with his character, loud mouth and aggressiveness....I did not listen and boy do i regret it with all my soul!!!
Amazing that you identified and defined this type of problem.
Just by learning about your descriptions and information about Psychological abuse is helping me cope with my parents..... The only way to be mentally out of this painful emotional abuse and controlling atmosphere by these extremely narcissistic individuals (parents), is to understanding the problem and finding concluding information to lay these attachments and feelings to rest... You are helping me, because the feelings felt inside is very painful and very emotionally confusing, (like an itch inside my stomach that i cannot reach) as my Parents are supposed to be loving and provide confidence, but are more like impostors ...... My parents destroyed parts of my life and when they see my succeed, as making more money then them.... they deliberately destroyed my image publicly and kicked me out of business which supports my new family, then they characterize me to people around me which destroyed my work with them professionally (I lost half of my income because of them) ... I believe that some people are sick and should not have children... and I dont think my parents will change because if they are Narcissistic, they would obviously think they are correct... without fault, which is a good characterization of what they have shown to me..... just in capable of changing....
Time to move on...
A true advocate for children and humanity🙌
I’m going through family court etc with a borderline BPD person now. I Iove this person and I always knew she never stood a chance in life, Because of her mother. After realizing. There’s no coping skills and so much more wrong. I need someone like this Dr expertise. To help me show and explain these things he’s talking about above. The details couldn’t be more spot on. This video was helpful in further understanding. I grew up in a functional household and my mind would never “go there” in understanding before . until things were just out of control. It took at least 4 years to come to the conclusions/realization. I wasn’t told about the BPD until after year 1. I done everything I knew to do at the time. I was only told after a talk saying “ I knew something was wrong.” This has ruined my hopes and dreams of a family life. I cry every night and I’m not me myself anymore. Getting evolved with these disorders can only be overcome with true love. I tell myself. (And therapy). Having said that.... im unsure it can be overcome at all.
your 5 descriptive behaviors described my daughter. I was stunned.. thought the contemptuous behavior was "normal" for teens.
This video has snapped the pieces of the puzzle together for me! Thank-you for posting this!
Me too
Mee too. Dont give up. Ask God for help.
In 2013 after 25 tears of extreme emotional abuse (on top of emotional, physical abandonment since birth) God opened my eyes to see what 'my family' was doing. The end result - My child (now 32) was brainwashed to believe I have no value and it's ok to treat me like dirt, My life is not right without him in it. I mourn the past and the present, And the future and family I will never have. And there is NOTHING I or anyone can do to fix it. Still struggling and in grief...
My parents destroyed my childhood. I got on drugs started drinking, now I'm off them completely sober and my parents cannot take one single shred of responsibility. The gas lighting is incredible. My ESTJ mother needs to see this but, she has no problems and won't watch anything if it requires her to be self-introspective.
You might want to stop blaming them, it’ll cut half your problems
I've been through the same thing man I know how it is. As hard as it is you have to move on and hope there is a place in hell for them later on.
To those in this thread I have a son who is 12. I can tell the traits that the doctor explains exists in him. Hurts my heart to think about divorce, but thinking it might be the only thing to save my son and his other siblings. The situations is so complicated. Any advice for the normal parent on how to support the children and help them to focus on the positive aspects of life?!
Don't forget the Stockholm Syndrome on the children. They can never get away safely from the Narcissistic parent. I only escaped by accident though the cost was high. With my children the Courts forced me to leave them behind as I had no contact or visitation rights. Years later the grapevine told me all 4 have not accomplished anything in their lives and still to live with the abuser when they are in their 30's. Depression and mental illness is in their lives, it's a vicious circle without hope. When my oldest daughter turned 32 I found her and told her Dad loves you and she can leave any time. The next day the Police wanted to lay Criminal Harassment charges against Dad and told me not to contact any other the others. Than several years later the one son made contact. He was mad, angry, upset with no empathy. I did not even want to be near him. I asked if he was going to tell the others that he met Dad. His reply was NO F-----g way. I asked way not and he explained it this way. That he would be ostracized put out on the street homeless just like what happened to Dad. No one is to know about the contact as he is still afraid of what would happen to him. Dad told him Good Luck!
I have a letter my daughter wrote to me, stating that she does not know why she has no empathy or care for me. I am on ROUND 3 of Parental Alienation. This time, I am taking legal action, criminal charges and civil suits. I cant believe that my 16 yo daughter and myself have been dragged into this nightmare.
My life has been destroyed, and our future, outcome and life has been permanently changed.
same happened to me but I dont believe in courts. I believe in God my father.
It has been two years since your comment. Do you have an update? Is there light at the end of the tunnel?
I am a loving mother where my kids were a victim of parental alienation against me. You described literally everything that happened to me. I am going to order your book from Amazon. Even the kids ’ lawyer didn't understand the damages which my ex-husband is doing for the kids.
same happened to me
Same happened to my mom.
I am a mother and the same happened to me. I was a very conscientious loving mother.
I am a mother going through this now and Im destroyed
All my children (3 in total) wanted to live with me when their mother told them she wanted a divorce because she had found someone new on the internet. This revelation angered her so much that she, with her family, deliberately set out to ensure that would never happen.
Her lies resulted in visits from the police, the social services/child welfare people and shadowy characters intent on destroying personal property.
And those lies never stopped. They just became more toxic. So toxic I was eventually left with no other option but to move away. I haven't seen my children for 13 years. They now believe I am the monster she made me out to be.
I'm going through that.
This was very helpful for diagnosing my own mental trauma from my parents. Thank you.
Been dealing with this for years now. Unfortunately yes the judges, the police, CPS, the schools, the psychologist, the doctors, the other family members, they all believe the people that are psychologically abusing my child and it continues to go on for years and nothing is ever done about it.
Divorce
This guy is 100% correct. The unfortunate thing is that it takes decades to fully understand it when you were the abused child.
Rejecting despite normal parenting
Grandiosity
Demonising
Lack of empathy
Fixed believe of victim hood (with no evidence)
Entitlement
All the above
It’s heartbreaking
so basically they're displaying narcissistic traits
The voice of truth and clinical diagnosis of pathogenic parenting! I.E. parental alienation! May every therapist learn as to avoid malpractice! May ever judge learn to avoid malpractice
Seen it done I'm the targeted parent there is no greater evil than this ! My child was innocent !
God help our children and grandchildren
I've listened to this video three times, back to back, because I couldn't believe that he just described my son as though he knows him personally. My son exhibits all three of these symptoms. I never believed his dad was poisoning my son against me...but he is. And I'm struggling to process that. I know my ex is a covert narcissist, but I had no idea that he has been putting any effort into weaponizing my son. I simply can't process that reality!
This is literally EXACTLY the life I'm living with my and my ex's children. I love my children with all my heart...biggest mistake of my life was having them with her though and no one to this point has been able to see thru her bullshit. It's beyond mind boggling how damaging her actions and words have been against our kids...and no one cares
The only expert on this subject who has truly understood the matter! Those who need this education are the judges, lawyers and therapists, but sadly they are not listening 🙉
He turned my children into his enablers...32yrs the last 12 unbearable, I was thrown away and abandoned by him and my two children...I don't get to have any relationship with my four grandchildren, haven't seen them for nearly three year's, my world destroyed, to say it's decimating is an under statement... it's almost impossible to find reason to go on! This is down to a covert narc mother creating a covert narc son who then infected our two children with they're craziness!
Sorry to hear. I hope you're working through this. I've pretty much lost everyone too.
This is amazing. I truly have been trying to understand my mental/physical/emotional state since I can remember and by analyzing it with a lot of psychology/medical/ethnological published journals I was able to get access during my BA. Great lecture. Loved my psych professor.
God Bless Him Sincerely..... Appointed by The Almighty To Speak Truths, Clinical Facts, and with Undeniable Conviction.
what’s crazy is I’m watching this and as I’ve gotten older I’ve come to realize that I was the child in this situation…
Wow, what has that been like? I'd love to hear your story.
@@jeffinjordan there’s really so much to it I wouldn’t even know where to begin. my parents separated when I was 6 but then divorced at 7 and every night as a child my parents would tuck me in and we’d pray “God bless daddy, mommy, and Katharine” but I think the first time I acted different towards my dad after they split was when he tucked me in and I just said “God bless mommy and Katharine” and I know that broke my dad’s heart. but overtime I started telling him how much I hated him and how I’d never see him again once I was old enough to tell the judge that’s what I wanted (my mom and grandma used to tell me I could choose when I turned 14 even though that wasn’t true either way). but yeah my mom was extremely emotionally unstable and would get angry if I said anything too nice about my dad and constantly tell me how he not only abused her but how he was abusing me and I couldn’t trust him. it got to the point where one time in third grade I left my homework at my dad’s house and when I told my mom about it she freaked out and said “NO you don’t know your dad like I do… he stole your homework on purpose so that you would make bad grades in school under my custody to make me look like a bad parent” and went to tell my teacher the next morning. then my teacher pulled me aside later and said “Katharine I know you didn’t do your homework and lied to play one parent against the other but what you did was wrong” and I apologized to her because I didn’t want to throw my mom under the bus… but then when my dad showed up at school to bring the homework I just started screaming at him in front of my teacher because I genuinely believed he stole it. but yeah I used to tell people, including the courts, that my dad was abusive and that he would always make my mom cry and how he treated me terribly but in reality my mom convinced me that he was worse than I realized. he used to be super calm and understanding with me and still loves me unconditionally to this day which makes me feel bad, but as a child I always thought him being calm and collected meant that he was just calculated like a psychopath (because my mom was so emotionally reactive that I could always tell what she was thinking but with my dad I couldn’t read him as well so that scared me about him). but then again my dad’s first attorney told him to record conversations with me saying mean things to him for evidence so when my mom’s family told me I was being recorded (and I even found his recorders a couple of times) that made me even more scared to talk in front of him. I quit saying I loved him for years and wouldn’t even smile in pictures (even in my dad and his second wife’s wedding photo I was purposely frowning because I was scared it could be used as evidence to take me away from my mom). then there was one time I gave my stepmom a pedicure when I was 9/10 and my dad tried recording a video of it because he thought it was cute and I had an entire meltdown over that. then when I was a teenager my mom & I started getting in really bad fights and she told everyone I was abusive even the courts so I eventually got distant & isolated from everyone (I’m an only child). but at this point I’m 18 and in college and I’m working to rebuild my relationships with my parents and they’re a lot better now, but I’m obviously still at a distance and don’t really open up easily to either of them. having good friends really did save me though, going to college changed my life in a way.
So true my mother abused me that led to me meeting another abuser who trained my kids to bully n abuse me too it's utterly evil the parents get away with this and wen there doing it there blaming the child
Now I can understand the behaviours of some children in my neighborhood after their parents have separated.
Children are a gift from God which parents should love, nurture & protect. Waring adults should not have a bearing on the children unless there are some form of child abuse & genuine endangerment ‼️💗💋
This is me.
I was abused by an alcoholic mother mentally and physically.
So the only trait I lack is the delusions bc the abuse did happen.
Also, abusers often accuse the other parent of this to explain why their child is fearful of them or does not want to live with them.
Bruh most of these comments are just that
Guess that's why he explains how haughty the kids are to the non abusive parent. Alienated kids aren't afraid of the parent they are looking their nose down on and accusing to their face. Only truly abused kids actually fear that parent to not be willing to say it to them. That's why it's fingerprints in the difference between truly abused kids and kids who have been manipulated into believing they were abused.
It happens to moms too. So why do all the people i ask for help...schools, principle, councelor, teachers, pediatricians, 8 psycholigists,lawyer,mediator,dentist , police, 45.000.00$ why do the people you ask for help decide to testify against you in a cuatody over false allegations and parental kiddnapping . should we stop asking for help how do we find that help?
I agree. I am writing my own story and that's the million dollar question I am asking in my. book. What do we do? How do we stop the wheels of this horrible family court system from turning in the wrong direction? How many targeted parents would have to die in order for the laws to change? HOw many kids will end up in rehab, with severe emotional baggage, angry at their parents for the rest of their lives, not allowing the grandparents to visit? I wish I had answers, my friend. I went through hell, and in a way, I don't want to relive it, except I know that just moving on is doing other targeted parents a huge disfavor.
I agree with you. The only thing I am doing is praying and emailing my son this kind of information with the hope that he will realize. Actually his mother just call me after 2 years to ask me stop emailing him. I am happy he is reading my emails and hope at one point he will react. Hope this helps.
I don’t remember him saying anything about gender. It was just targeted parent and alienating parent.
God will help us
Pray
🙏🌌☮️🎆🙏✝️🕊️🕊️🕊️
@@nataliamartin6816 court certainly is a lot like hell - because it's not from God, it's from £££ 🤑🤑 a false God
🕊️✝️🙏🎆☮️🌌
I would’ve loved someone to step in to my childhood and help me
Excellent presentation Dr Childress!! Thanks for your work!!
Watching this makes me wanna cry. I’ll be long gone by the time the law does something about this. I’m a women my sons father was very emotionally, sexually and verbally abusive. I met his dad in high school when I was 15 he alienated me from my friends and 2 years later I found myself pregnant. I was to young to realize the abuse I was going through and thought it was normal. I realized that I had a whole life ahead of me and wasn’t going to fall victim to him anymore. However I did not have anyone to help me with my son and his father took full advantage of that. I also did not have a car. His dad would not allow me to see my son unless I had sex with him or spent time with him. This went on for years. In my early 20s I had to put his dad on child support to get help for daycare his dad hated that and because he was helping me out a lot with my son I took him off of child support but I didn’t read the court papers and did not have a lawyer because I never knew that his father was asking for joint custody and at the time I had no idea what he was really planning to do. His father always told me that if we were not going to be together that he was going to make sure he made my life hell but I was to clueless to see what he was doing I always tried to see the good in him because he always told me that he was always just looking out for my best interest and so no matter what happened to me in my mind I thought he would never be so evil but that’s how people think when they are under the influence of these type of people.When I was 26 his dad got another girl pregnant and sent me court orders to take custody of my son. He won. He lied to the court and accused me of things that never happened my lawyer didn’t even ask for proof of the accusations from police reports I had a horrible lawyer that I should have fired on the spot but I was to young to know any better and I was completely alone I don’t have family it’s just me to fend for myself. Anyway my son was very young then and put under a lot of stress to the point where I thought it was best for me not to push to talk and see him because of the harm I saw it was causing him. I told myself I wasn’t as good as his dad and his father was better then me so it was in his best interest. I never gave up though I said if his father doesn’t want to have anything to do with me that is ok I’ll get my son a cell phone. On my sons 6th birthday I went to his school and asked the front desk if they can call my son out because his dad was making it impossible for me to see him and it was his birthday and I just wanted him to know no matter what I’ll do what I can to see him. I bought him a cell phone he was so happy. But I knew deep down inside his dad was going to take it away from him and he did. By then I had already gotten a car and so I would just go and honk and pick up my son at his dads and grandmas house. As he gets older he’s 13 now he shows all these signs. Today I learned about malicious parent syndrome. It makes me so angry to know I’m going through this and still alone and here’s this man stating facts and proof with data and the law has done nothing and it’s nearly impossible to do because it’s cost so much money it’s impossible! I’m furious and crying because it hurts and it’s such an impossible situation. I see my son sad and depressed and miserable and it breaks my heart I realized today that his father never had my sons best interest in mind because I see my poor innocent son going through the same abuse I went through. I feel so alone and helpless and let down most importantly my son is going through this. Theirs a monster out there just getting away with this because he knows he can because the law has sided by him and lawyers are only for the rich.
Thank you so much sir!!! I needed to hear this, right in this moment 😌😌 reading my old psych records; this puts things into perspective so much, because I honestly don't think that the neuropsychologist doing my evaluation all those years ago picked up on this at all...😳🤯🤯 It helps hearing that I was mainly just reacting to my environment and the way that I was being treated...😔😔😮💨😮💨 Thank you 💜💜🙏🙏🙏
So true and it makes me cry. I’m glad I found this video
Psychological abuse is worse than plain physical abuse, because as least the child can see their wounds
“physical assaults don’t leave emotional wounds”🤡
In my experience as the spouse of that psychologically abused child, if you replace the phrase "normal range parent" with the word "abused child's spouse," you'll get a very clear picture of that child's future marriage. Sad times for all.
I'm illuminated by god, when i have a job i will surely leaving
This is a drop in the bucket of my childhood my mother was a bad parent and still pure evil to this day..she deserve to burn in hell. & some people don't deserve to bring kids into the world..Going to tell you some of what happened in my life as a child and I'm still effected by it today. We were homeless as a child do to poor choices the lady who birth me , she never showed love for her children. I've had a number of conversations/ disagreements with her about how she failed me as a child and her excuses are always telling me it's my fault. she's a very cold hearted monster, with no heart or soul whatsoever. I am the youngest born with SMA ( spinal muscular atrophy) She never been supportive in any situations. She had her older kids saying negative things making , one constantly calling me cripple on different occasions and the lady that birth me smirk as if it was funny. She never cared ever and I got a brother who suffer from autism, she never got him the help he needed. she beat and abused him a lot calling him names like crazy or profanity names very often. She should've given me & him up for adoption because from the age 8, I believe we became homeless hungry going from house to house then vacant apartment to vacant apartments in the projects. I remember she would ask people to borrow money when she had no income to pay it back, sometimes she borrow $15 , 10, or 5, whatever people could afford to give. I remember she were only able to borrow $5 this one time and she bought a pack of cigarettes that cost about $3.35 and this had to be around 1985. I remember asking her to buy some food and she said I am buying me some cigarette because if I buy food once the food gone then what. I said we can't eat cigarettes. she bought the cigarette, then she use the rest which was about $1.75 left to buy some penny candy. she said eat some candy to kill the hungry pain. My brother who suffer from autism , she beat on him a lot she handcuffed him to the chair with handcuffs that my dad son with his ex wife given her, he worked as a security at that time. she wouldn't get him on medication and when she did she trashed a lot of the medication saying she not giving him that. I went to school first grade and I missed 2nd 3rd and 4th grade do to her not being in her business like she should've. she point a finger at everyone but don't accept responsibility for her own action rite now today.I told her that a step brother molested me at age 5 and she said I didn't tell her and I said the other grown ups made me think it was my fault and she told me it's my fault for not telling her. She treat me so bad do to my disability and I'm the only one who try to help help but never again because she don't exist to me. when I did get in school in 5th grade I act out so badly do to what I was going through with and she sat around waiting on people to give. i Remember one of my step brother ask her to watch his sick child about age 3, he had brain tumors, she told me she whip him because he doing all that crying and he was to old to be in pampers. I told her he was sick she didn't care. She is pure evil. one of my other brothers gmjpin the gang living in the projects and he ask her to put him in a different school he was about 14, she said no because he shouldn't be hanging with gangs but that was all he knew because we grew up in that hood. He really had no choice but to join or get picked on but the school was a few blocks away in the rival gang turf. I told her that her old neighbor tried to molest me and I didn't tell her and I told her I shouldn't been outside 2 and 3 am and sleeping in vacant apartments just me in my autism bother most time because she wasn't there. she make up a million excuses. she told it's old stuff I'm bringing up and to get over it. she don't understand the scares are real deep and to make it worst she won't apologize she don't think she's wrong. I told her I was a 8 year old child staying in vacant apartments hungry many days.Has no soap no deodorant no nothing. this story so long so deep and it can go on forever. my dad had custody of him and his ex wife kids and he and they got beat and abused , one of his daughters told that our dad sisters would make them pull they panties down then sniff between they legs to see how they smelled and smirking making fun of and laughing. I plan to write a book and I wish it could be a movie bcuz the world definitely need to know.
I am so sad to hear what you have been exposed too, sending you prayers and healing thoughts
❤️❤️
your mother is not just a bad parent, but a stupid parent. stupidity is rampant in these parents.
My first husband did this with my daughter who he adopted. I could not understand what was happening to her she shunning me . Only wanting him. He planted so many wrong things that were not so that she has banned me from her life up unto this day. She is 49 and i am 68 and it has been a nightmare. When we separated he said if i didnt stay with him he would take everything that met anything away and he did. She did say her husband doesn’t know the truth and telling him im sure he would leave.
The same happened to me. I COULD NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS HAPPENING. The only thing I am doing is praying and emailing my son (14) this kind of information with the hope that he will realize. Actually his mother just call me after 2 years to ask me stop emailing him. I am happy he is reading my emails and hope that at one point he will react. Hope this helps and always, always pray to God.
For starters, I’d like to say Thank you, for your studies, hard work and contribution towards the awareness of the psychological-warfare being implemented within the household before the child can even experience the world.
The internal scars one carries are the hardest to produce the burden of proof. At least now there is some psychological-forensic analysis being done for the betterment of a brighter tomorrow.
This is what I’m dealing with in my two boys and it’s a horrible thing to witness and be a part of!
This type of hyper severe parental alienation is not as common as some would have you believe but it really exists and the courts and mental professionals will miss it every time. Dr Childress is an extremely perceptive person. If it hadn't happened to my daughter I never would have believed all this was remotely possible. Any thumbs down on this video were made by people who used to be like me (skeptical), or by the parents who are actually doing this kind of alienation.
Too many sick parents
Mentally Abused Children today, mentally Abusing parents tomorrow, this nonsense needs to be stopped, system needs to focus on Children not making money over Children
Attorneys, judges, so called court ordered bloodsucking therapist, gals, they know nothing about Parental Alienation, they are all about money and here is the Result a Mentally messed up America
Yes it is
yeah. This type of abusive parenting is especially prevalent in first generation migrant indian parents.
My God this was going on around me. I knew we were dysfunctional but could never imagine it was this bad. It was my husband that was manipulating our sons. After 34/years with our sons grown I finally left. My son’s (30 years old) was so angry with me he texted ‘I will not abandon Dad.’ So much more has been reveled since then. I truly do not know what to say or do anymore.
And after all of this the baby grows up into an adult. Then learns from getting kicked around and bumping up against a handful of normal adults that they are screwed up. It takes time for this to reveal itself. It's the very fortunate and insightful "screwed up" one that finally sees they need to get help. On the journey towards healing over time years and years later and within that enlightenment the wounded child within heals and the now mentally healthy adult can forgive mom dad or other or everyone for their shortcomings. At this very final stage of healing is when the healthy adult can let go forgive and move on. And this doesn't mean that they will choose to associate with their abusers or screwed up past care givers. That's their choice. Moving on setting everybody free and feeling free and being free. That's peace. That's true success and freedom!!❤
I’ve been looking for this video for months
More authorities need to go through classes and training to learn about this difficult to identify family abuse. So many good true child parnet relationships would be saved.
What?
I would love to hear this in layman's terms. I want to know tell my sister became a narcissist when her mother and stepfather were both really wonderful to all of us equally. But she became jealous when the youngest sibling was molested at 3 years old because the attention wasn't on her. She was given all the same things, supported by a great mom, treated with respect and never abused just like all the other children but she's truly a narcissist
My son and daughter are being under psychological and emotional abuse at the hands of my narcissistic mother, their grandmother as they have been put under her care while I receive counseling to become stronger and emotionally healthy enough to prove stable enough for them to be put back with me. My mother has never supported or comforted me when I broke down and also had endured some major traumatic experiences from people I thought were friends. All she cared about was my sporadic use of cocaine that I desperately ran to in an attempt to handle all the traumatic events I had recently endured within such a short period of time all while still needing to stay on top of being my children's only caregiver with very little if any break I so drastically needed and was purposely and so very obviously denied by the only 2 people who should have been there for these babies too. Their father and their grandmother who lived just down the street. I am so sick of her and her entire side of the family included my only brother as they are all hateful and narcissistic abusers who have always hurt me and scapegoated me as the problem. My dad was also hated by that whole side of my moms family and when he died from cancer 3 years ago, I became their sole target of abuse. So I am having a seriously traumatic time with my kids having to live their for the last 2 months while I receive counseling for my emotional breakdown while not one of them has ever once acknowledged that just maybe their emotional abuse and all the purposely inflicted hate and blame against me while I was needing support from family and still grieving the loss of my dad, the only one my family who I had a real closeness with and the only one who loved me for real, no agenda of abuse. Now my kids are my only family and that is how I plan to have it as soon as I am able to move and have my babies back with me. We will be going completely no contact with every single member of that sadistic and narcissistic abusive family. They ain't my family!!
OMG…. Eye opening on so so much
was put through this very thing. funny, the iPhone situation happened with my oldest daughter, who now barely speaks to me after 15years of a wonderful relationship
the iphone thing happened to me too!
These narcissistic mothers lie to the expert psychologists and evaluators hence being able to keep their control and manipulation tactics a secret. The court system is made to support mothers keeping their children in their control, it's sad. The poor kids don't realise until their adults
Actually this is not gendered let’s not go down that rabbit hole. I was in court with my abuser. He was the only man in the room. It didn’t help me at all.
You also are forgetting the traditional set up of the family REQUIRES the mother to "control her kids" just like it requires the male/father to "control" the mother shit goes down hill. Most men are narcs who go at the mom who may or may not be a narc but will transfer that down to the kids its literally a trait & feature of the traditional family everyone pretends is the sacred cow of upbringing a child it's not a bug.
these family's are encoded to be emeshed, tier controlling, and dysfunctional since religion feeds dysfunction of this family it does not and will not encode what is true healthy family structure, communication, or arrangement the pastors aid in the lie as well so it's not just what shitty verse did the book write on it it's also what did the pastor lie to your face on that it said.
Most verses spend at length giving detailed instructions to the party that is most able to abuse the guidelines set out most of the verses meant for men are not read to the church and no one goes looking & that's considering you have the whole text but chances are if your a catholic you have an altered text none of them are 100% complete. And then we have the back up & added support of both patriarchy, capitalism how it incentivizes & normalizes dysfunction at it's root so even athiest aren't getting out of it!
Fathers keenly control their daughters as well so they can equally do this mind controlling abuse on them & patriarchy backs them up as good fathers & how normal they are to do it!
This is Very helpful. Thank you so much for what you do👏🏼
Thank you! I needed to hear this
Dude I have like all 5 of those I hate it I wish I could get rid of those 5. But it’s just like he said the parents leave their finger prints on a child
If only more people like him held high educational positions....
He described my life
And my sister has severe anger issues because of me and my mother
Same here , my childhood fuxked up my adult relationships ! Just been dumper after 17 years to a beautiful woman and we have two lovely children due to my narcissist sulking !
What if the “rejected” parent IS the narcissistic??? And uses the courts and cries alienation? Can we talk about this?
Yes we can. Look to see who has all the power and control, that’s the abusive one
Growing up in a world of lies is soul destroying.
Whoever posted this video God bless you
With an awareness of having PD under a certain set of circumstances only, how can the person improve? By theory the child becomes the parent and the cycle continues.
The PD from generation to generation may differ. But the traits are still passed down even if smaller. What is the answer?!
What's Fu&&&cked up is that these psychologists create these words and accuse you of being the bad parent if you can't agree to what the psychologists say is healthy or not. Diagnose the parent, not the child.
I'm so tired he was in jail for domestic violence now he is out was acting like he changed wanted to help until I told him because we are separeted I don't think it's respectful for him to be inside my house all the time, I felt he was controling my space and my time my all environment, since I told him for us to meet in public space for him to be with the children everything changed, he started talking bad abouth me to the kids, always trying to have a figth, etc.... Today I didn't let my kid put a toy in bathtub he told me "mother that's why you are a a pig, dirty and loser" I did not believe my ears, my son is a sweet child and very dear never said a silly word so my heart was broken and i only ask God to help me overcome this moment of turbulence in my life
I wish I had your help. I have not had any contact with my daughter for a year. We had a wonderful, close relationship. In a fee days, the divorce will be over and he has100% custody of my our daughter and has her believing I am some evil, dangerous person. I never even spanked my kids. And no one will help me. Coached by my ex, my daughter told the police I was crazy. Im the parent that loves her so much. She thinks she has DID, schizophrenia, tourette's syndrome, she has changed her name and does not even know who she is. He is fostering this sick role in which he gets to be the savior for. He blocks all communication. Family court, police, no one will help me. Its so sick and no one sees. What can I do?
sad there are no repercussions for doing this to a child.
This just made so much sense to me. My son's mother is creating this exact scenario.
Wow! Hi cannot believe what I just saw you are a genius oh my God you are a genius thank you oh my gosh OK I got it wow that was just striking I just happened by it and I’m it’s the best thing I’ve heard in 100 million years! Thank you
brilliantly said
Save yourselves and give thanks for those who love you. Your kids will
Never be the same and no one in this country really cares. Learn to live your lives because no one is stopping this anytime soon.
We are fighting to stop this for future generations.
Maybe add that the therapist in charge needs to also see the family being treated or consulted needs to be looked at as a whole. Family members in immediate family in number. Not told that the other minor child is not my patient. Sorry can't help??? I'm sorry, but the cozy relationship the psychologist has when it "Seems the one parent has it toghther because of winning custody in court ect,. Has no idea how that person won or the deceit to get there for the win. They snow everyone in their path to get there, including the professionals as they are one themselves in a highly manipulative manner! Greasy lawyers and illegal maneuverz. Total abuse as far as even being able to use your own coping skills! Look for signs of non participation of total family counts. My biggest statement I had during all of my nightmare with corrupt courts and people. A message to the so called educated degreed therapist was "I have 2 children not just 1! This is a court order of " Reunification" how my exhusband of 15 legal years and partner of 23 years total. Got to this was disturbing and you don't have the twits or the time to actually look at it in a responseable way to make an educated guess even! At any cost he was going to keep me from my children or what I needed to even start over at 42! I was swindled in a fragile state legally and no means to combat it or mental wrongness to relive the trauma again. All this my exhusband achieved to break me! This through the sea of protection my family was to have! The system there to put it back together failed us all. Start with new laws on the books! Report abuse, inquire and set a bar of behavior expected as normal and disfunctionable! Red flags and criminal. Don't get snowed by a sociopath. You should focus on the approach of a parent that promotes nothing but havoc. Telling every excuse under the sun or lies to avoid reunion with our basic human rights. Long winded lies to look better ect. PS I'm a mom and don't do drugs and don't drink and was the primary care giver for a 10/11 daughter & son. A wonderful mom at that. I was emotionally torn down and alienated from my 2 children. All over money and a home and custody children. He a drinker, pot smoking burden father. Afraid of doing what was best. He took this to a level of no return. The last thing I said to my husband was you owe your family a big fucking apology. He's a sociopath and has no capacity to have emotions or empathy. This all over a divorce. I took nothing and now rebuilding my life. Mom discarded like yesterday's trash! Literally! You think it can't happen to a normal great mom. Lol think again! I could educate for the signs of every dealings of the effects of a sociopath. I live it and lived it!!!
The same happened to me. Lawyers and judges look at their own interest.
Total abuse. I think I was a wonderful father too. Now I still think I was very good but have my own faults. I provided for the family but it was not enough for my ex. She wanted to be the boss. She took this to a level of no return. Dad discarded like yesterday's trash! Literally! Now I pray to God everyday. The pain doesnt completely go but for sure He helps.
so sorry for what youve been throigh
I have watched my ex husband use police, cps, therapist, judges, mino9 counsel and most of all my daughter... all to get out of child support. .it's crazy what a narcissist will do to get what they want
I just tried to have a conversation with my husband about the possibility of being sexually abused. He had a blow up. He wanted to end the conversation so he started saying “I get it, I’m a piece of shit!’ And then he stormed out. Like he always does. So nothing will change. He still won’t seek therapy. He gets to stay in a pretend world where mommy and daddy were perfect. Perfect was very important to mommy and daddy.