I don’t have TikTok, and I don’t want that app on my iPhone. I love your content, Emily…do you think you could make a part 2 for us guys who love your content but don’t want TikTok on our devices? If not, it’s cool…I just figured it couldn’t hurt to ask nicely. Anyway, keep up the good videos. Sending love & aloha from Honolulu to you and your entire ohana! Your little keiki is so adorable BTW! 🥰🤙🏽❤️🌈☀️
@@parrj316 I’m a woman and I lived with a mom who could be very rigid and controlling so I’m deliberately not like that. She absolutely had control issues from childhood abuse. The problem is, as she became an adult, it was her responsibility to address it, not the responsibility of the kids and her husband to bend every time she snapped her fingers.
She is right he is wrong = the bad man. Nothing to do with the garbage, just how she keeps her man=child in his place. Please if this is the new relationship model, let’s go back to the patriarchy model, which was in general practice not even close to how toxic this woman feels perfectly comfortable describing her feminist domination over men, perspective clearly is. This has unfortunately become more of the established relationship model with college educated women than not. Men should embrace the divorce when these women finally initiate it after having fully emasculated their husbands. Guys need meninism training to counter these modern women’s feminist domestic pet training tactics.
When a wife nags her husband, trying to ride roughshod OVER him..... .... by the will of God, and even like God, concerning his bride, the man... .... he WILL resist her, unless or until he senses that she has some genuine (God fearing) reverence for him, whether she thinks her deserves it or not. Quite often she chooses divorce over doing marriage God's way Resisting her dominant behavior (may) be a godlike trait in him..
True. Women measure a man's love by how much he does for her, and how quickly he does it. Personally, I don't want my love to be measured that way. Because all she's doing is destroying it.
Unfortunately many women view this as an indicator of a man’s loyalty and love for her. By his obedience to her demands for how and when he does things. Toxic attitude and they usually don’t even realize it. And likely also the kind to withhold intimacy to ‘punish’ him. These women basically treat their partner like a child instead of a mature adult that does not need her to take care of him or control him.
I am willing to bet money that there either wasn't even a mention or it was a monologue with no chance for him to speak. No way in hell did that woman discuss anything with a guy
@angrydragonslayer Or, it was discussed in his absence. My wife says she tells me stuff all the time. I have no recollection of her ever saying anything. Either I have a doppelganger or she's 'telling' me when I'm asleep or not around.
That she’s entitled Karen that never should’ve been married in the first place in the only reason she did it because she probably tricked successful man in the marrying her Like this is the kind of woman that sits in her home on Facebook all day, and then complains to her husband after a day of work why the house isn’t clean She sat at home all day in a dirty house, waiting to tell her husband why the house is not clean. That is the kind of woman she is.
So she's not his mother but she wants him to do what she wants, when she wants, regardless of his thoughts on the matter? So she wants all the authority of being his mother with none of the responsibility that comes with being his mother. Sounds like a great mentality for a relationship.
Yes. I'm quite active in multiple discussions about stuff like this. Do you know WHERE I discuss "if what you ask for have to be done exactely now or can be delayed and what could be the cause?" When I discuss forking "traditional/conservative/authotritarian vs modern/authoritive upbringing".
@@Matthew10950 Yeah there's no such thing. People are flawed. No person is perfect. But being in a relationship with someone you desire, respect truly love and who loves you too is the single most rewarding thing in the world if you ask me. Nothing is better. Sports cars? Boats? Pfft. That's nothing. Not even cocaine feels as good. But it takes work and compromise and compassion and all that stuff. But it's well worth it if you ask me. I don't see how you can say that. Are you sure it's not your own standards? Or maybe it's one of those things where you have some ideas about women that aren't really realistic? I don't know. But I don't see how anyone could say that.
If they're all either the right one or the wrong one, then they'll all be the wrong one. Being in a relationship with a toxic person is hell. That's true. But the thing is, everyone has flaws. And those flaws eventually will start to get on your nerves. It's inevitable. The same is true for you. Relationship require compromise and work and all. Relationships are like sleeping bags. When you first get in they feel so good. You feel comfy and cozy and you never want to leave. But eventually it always gets kinda hot. You feel strangled by it. Finally you feel like you'll go crazy if you can't just get one foot out. At that point it all just falls apart. So first it's important to get the right one. You don't use an arctic survival bag in Florida for example. But if you have the right one and you're still having problems, well, then the metaphor breaks down but in short, you have to look inward. Lol.
@PaulTheSkeptic I have a great wife. And great kids. Almost perfect. I've never met a married man that wouldn't rather be on his own. Not one, not ever, and I work a job where I talk to hundreds of men a week. Some of them are asshats, sure. But not all.
@@PaulTheSkeptic I think what he meant by perfect one is your actual soul mate who you were destined to be with for the rest of your life. Either that or perfect one means God
I love it -"it'll be done, but not on the timeleine that I made up.....or that we discussed". She doesn't actually care about anything besides making sure he follows her orders.
Honestly a bad argument because it misses the point. Whether he wants anything or not is irrelevant - you don't treat someone like your personal servant. Period.
@jesseessej I totally agree with you that no one should be treated that way but his example of intimacy is perfect. Most women will only have sex when they want it (not in the mood, headache, tired, etc.), not when their man wants it. I do think, however, a better argument would be if she wanted it done so badly, why doesn't she just take it out herself instead of complaining about it not being done? Is she incapable? No. Lazy and controlling.
@@AWelter750taking out the trash and giving your body to someone are not the same things. First off. Second off some men are the ones that want sex less then their wives. So we don't know if that's the case here or not.
@@AWelter750maybe she does a lot of other things around the house and it's one job he can do. Maybe they even both work like a lot of families and yet she's doing all the household duties and he can't take out the trash. You have no idea from this one clip what their life is like.
I think it can be unintentional. The real tell is, if you calmly point out what she's doing, is she reasonable and willing to work out an agreement? Or does she dig in her heels and refuse to take accountability?
Yeah, I'd be just as annoyed. I'd tell her, "I'll get the garbage out the night before garbage pickup, not at 6 PM because then bylaw will get involved and fine us. You wouldn't want that on your conscious now, would you?"
Basically “I want it done my Way and I’ll throw a fit if it isn’t done my way, but iM nOt hIs MoThEr so I don’t have to communicate when I want it done.”
I was raised that the garbage gets taken out when the garbage Needs to be taken out. It's Everybody's job. The Garbage decides when it needs to be taken out. We won't be having this talk again.
Yes. My mother is like that and honestly? Even she would probably see the issue here, claiming arents can demand stuff to be done imidiatelly from a kid but he's not her kid so she can't.
@@MomeGnome The comparison is that she wants one thing on demand when she wants it without telling him and he's supposed to know it. He has the same desire, for intimacy, but she doesn't know it either and she, probably, doesn't think that's wrong. Understand?
I just saw a post yesterday of a girl with ALL of the girls in the comments agreeing with her that women are tired of HAVING to constantly tell their men what to do. Let that sink in. I was so incredibly tempted to say “yeah I’m tired of women not doing what I tell them to do when I want it done I don’t want to be their father why do I have to constantly tell women what to do?” just to see their heads explode from hypocrisy.
They'll just say you hate women and your a misogynist. I usually just agree with them now. Edit: Those saying I am just encouraging them are only seeing it the way they want it to be. Truth is these girls have a plan and an MO and they learned it long before me. It's their survival mechanism and me not feeding it instead of engaging into and vindicating their manipulation may actually teach them that it doesn't work because they don't get the response they want. Getting bothered and challenging them is what they want. So they can point and say see? Violent. Controlling. Don't feed the animals.
Don’t encourage the delusion never miss out on opportunity to call people on their bullshit cause it is funny as hell when they try to rationalize it then resort to name calling like the immature people they are. Calling it acting like a child is honestly an insult to children at this point.
Everyone has lost it in the sauce. Both men and women jeeeesus 😅 The modern feminist bull crap and boys idolizing scam artist womanizers created a retarded eco system of toxic waste. People online acting like a woman is above making a dude some lunch or doing the laundry because “iM nOt hIs mOMMa!!😡😡😡” or some crap like that 😂 And then we have some guys just straight up denying female nature and saying “yeah I won’t allow that” Yeah, the fuck you will dingus 😂 It’s all about money sex and “love” What about teamwork? Where’d that go?
Holy hell, this is my situation. 😂 I have to laugh about it as I try to explain to my wife. “You’re just supposed to know!” She says. “No babe. I failed miserably in mind-reading class. And why don’t you know when I want to be intimate?”
@@Peyton3176 What are you even apologising for? You know what.. her husband was probably rolled up on the couch watching video games while she was cleaning up after dinner, putting the kids to sleep, doing the dishes, cleaning up the kitchen sink. That ONE thing she needed him to do was take the trash out and he has the AUDACITY to complain and bargain about timing? How complex is it anyway? Well John, it blows my mind that you actually need to negotiate a 10 hour window just to take the trash. Hmm.. maybe I would like to negotiate the time I decide to cook dinner.
@@RapK-fu2sh I guess you do have a good point. You kinda changed my opinion there, if he's being told to do something, he better do it. I'm your wife, not your mommy. Some men nowadays need to learn how to pick up after themselves. I appreciate the support 😅❤️
@@Peyton3176 Glad you can see where I'm coming from!❤ It really is hilarious how the old guy was talking about "timeline". She cleaned up the house and the trash bag is full, meaning it's time to take it out. How many days does a guy need to take a bag of trash outside? It's not a complex home-building project! Men be purposely making it sound like women are unreasonable and then they label being asked to help with ONE chore as "unwanted step-child" treatment. How dramatic! I don't know why women have accepted such disrespect from men.
My ex took it out before I arrived home from work, first time in 20 years, so I thanked her. " I don't know why you're thanking me" she replied, "I always do it". "GAS, GAS, GAS! TAKE COVER!!" 🔥
My husband asked me years ago, what do I need to do for you not to ever ask for me to do shores anymore? I said, the housekeeper needs to come 2 times per week.Now, I send our laundry 🧺 to be washed and folded at the cleaners.We no longer have arguments and have more time to spend looking after our child ☯️
@@Sakanx Uh... Yeah? That's basically the whole first half of your childhood. "Don't go there, it's dangerous. Don't touch that, it's hot/sharp/pointy. Don't eat that, it's poison. Use the toilet sweety, don't let go in your pants. You WILL eat your peas and broccoli. You have to go to school because it's important for reasons you're too small to understand. No, you can't just eat nothing but pancakes baby, that's not good for you. Do your homework. Your room looks terrible, clean it. Put your toys away when you're done with them." Now, HOW they boss you around is debatable and a big part of parenting, but the bossing around is required unless we want natural selection to get a whole lot more brutal.
@@Sakanxyeah, parents should, that's the whole point. They're kids they know nothing, you HAVE to boss em, they aren't your equal, life is dangerous and they should listen.
I tell my husband “thank you , I appreciate it!” He thanks me for simple things I do. Amazing that something so simple goes so far. Best 28 years ever.
This! Just expressing a level of gratitude and appreciation will create a positive relationship and increase your man’s likelihood of doing kind things again
I’ve heard many people say you should get a thank you for the stuff you “expected to do” regularly. My wife also says thank for the little things like cleaning a toilet, or trash, and honestly it’s the kindest thing. makes me more in love with her simply feeling appreciated for the little stuff. IMO it’s never a fault to show a significant other kindness and appreciation for the consistent little gestures, “chores” or otherwise. It also makes me realize how much someone may not hear these words of appreciation and gratitude in their job or daily life simply by how positive I felt after hearing them.
Been with my wife for 40 years. Everything starts with “Please” and ends with “Thank you.” Everything is a request, not a demand. We share in the work, and we help each other out. It’s certainly managed to work well for us for 40 years. Maybe some others here ought to give it a try.
@@rachelputney5243 This argument is perfectly logical. Women just do not like the example because it uses her own logic against her. Women will only have sex with their partner when she wants to have sex--not when he wants it. Yet, she expects him to do this task when she wants it. For the first scenario, the first thing many women will say is I am not your slave when saying to sex. It applies in the other scenario as well. You husband is not your slave either and you are not his mother. Nagging women end up with husbands that tune them out after awhile.
@@don8668 that’s just ur experience not every other man’s experience. I’ve had plenty of sex with my partner when I didn’t want to. 🙄 I’m just curious what makes you think you could speak for women anyway?
The real peace is when the work week is done, I do whatever the hell I want to do on the weekend, and there's no guilt or grief for what I chose. Also, I have to deal with the consequences if I procrastinated on garage cleaning on my own time frame. Priceless!!
Garbage is not the issue - it’s a symptom of something bigger. There is either entitlement, resentment, or a pretext she is using to exit the relationship.
I've had this exact same discussion at home and actually used this exact phrasing. The problem is not that I don't or won't but simply that it is not done on her schedule. My solution was and still is that if it means so much to you that it be done at the exact moment you demand, then do it yourself. There are several things I do myself because I do it the way I prefer it done: my laundry (how it is washed, dried, folded and hung up or placed in a drawer), my ironing, cooking certain meals, etc. How would it go over if I complained about the way she did something she perceived as helping me? Say washing my vehicle and not that she missed a spot but she did it differently and it was clean but I didn't like how she went about it. How would that go over? Right. Boss B's die alone for a reason.
Yup. I know someone that went to marriage counseling and this was brought up. Therapist told the wife that she can’t expect another adult to just jump at the snap of her finger and do what she wants when she wants it done. She never went back after she was told she was wrong.
Yep. My ex-wife hated our marriage counselor because he didn't roll over and tell her that she was right about everything and anything. He told me in private that I need to get divorced and not save the marriage.
Funny cause I had the same experience with my ex. She was a feminist and refused to see a bloke so we got this chick doctor and she went on to tell my ex how bad her attitude was. I laughed all the way home because I knew we where never going back.
No it's not. She's annoyed with him. She doesn't respect him. She needs to berate him to justify her feelings ...that she may not love him anymore. He needs to check her. If that doesn't work, he should leave her because it's too damn late.
Been with my wife for 40 years. Everything starts with “Please” and ends with “Thank you.” Everything is a request, not a demand. We share in the work, and we help each other out. It’s certainly managed to work well for us for 40 years. Maybe some others here ought to give it a try.
"He is not doing it on the schedule that we discussed"... We all know exactly how that "conversation" went. Gaslighting, manipulation, and controlling. Don't disrespect your man if you want to have a happy marriage. If he has agreed and without coercion truly agreed that is his job around the house then you need to also figure out a way that he can know it is full and have a resonable time frame to get to it.
@@TheDXJC56Being paid makes a huge fucking difference. If I wasn't being paid to do my job I wouldn't do it at all. Likewise if a women gives me no reason to tolerate her presence in my life then I'm not doing it at all 😂
The amount of men that just bowed to this attitude is why i plan on staying single. "I'm not his mother" is so stupid, if the man said "I'm not her father" and didn't take care of chores or anything dealing with the finances watch how quickly women like that act like you're a tyrant
You made an assumption based on your position. Which lends plenty of oversight. First, when you said "men that bowed", it would have more accurate if you said "boys bowed".. Second, boys argue like girls.(I'm not her father) Apparently, you need a daddy to. Quit whining about your lack and then projecting it on females.
Given that this is a common complaint among women (not just this one specifically but the category of things similar to it), I'd say a majority of men are not bowing to this attitude.
@@brassman7599It's wrong to give in. She's emasculating him. IE: her wishes are more important than his schedule. They should come up with an agreement, and not mention it again.
You made an assumption based on your position. Which lends plenty of oversight. First, when you said "men that bowed", it would have more accuracy if you said "boys bowed".. Second, boys argue like girls.(I'm not her father) Apparently, you need a daddy to. Quit whining about your lack and then projecting it on females.
Years ago my wife use to make this complaint. Early on in the relationship she would say, "Why do I always have to tell you to take out the trash?" My answer, "Because you think I'm listening but I've been responsible for taking out the trash since childhood and my mom never had to tell me to take out the trash!" She never mentioned the trash after that exchange.
Some females love talking to you like a child, which is insulting af. I could never be in a relationship with a gal like that, no matter how hot she is.
My partner is the “10 bag will stack up” & we’ve now missed collection day 😅🤣😂. I don’t like having to ask multiple times so I don’t, it’s been 7 years, the day hasn’t changed. 90% of the time, if I’m at home, I’m running them out close the deadline 😅🤣😂. He has a worse memory than a gold fish (he will say this himself) so I can’t really get mad nor do I 😅🤣😂. You can give him a list to go a shop 5mins away, put it in his pocket, & he’ll forget he has a list 😅🤣😂. Hope all who happen to read this are having a lovely day/night/life❣️
@MorbidClown a good man will be doing enough already that it won't matter if he doesn't take the garbage out. As a woman, I take the trash out because I am perfectly capable of doing so and my husband does alot already.
My husband usually takes the garbage out because it’s heavy and gets stuck and I usually do the dishes because he hates doing them but sometimes he doesn’t take out the garbage, so I’ll do it. just like I don’t do the dishes sometimes, so he’ll do them. We help each other 🤷🏻♀️ I don’t understand why it has to be such a big deal.
Oh wow, you alternate work because it needs getting done?! You see I do the dishes otherwise they pile up in the sink, on the island, on the kitchen table, couch, wife’s work desk, etc. “I” do them. No one else. I also take out the garbage. My wife would never ever ever take out the garbage or do dishes.
My husband is fab about taking it out. He's actually fab all around, and I'm so, so grateful. I think she should focus on all the good things he does do. If he hasn't taken it out by the time she wants it doing, she could be super passive aggressive, and announce "I'm taking the garbage out!" She could just take it out, or she could say some along the lines of "I really appreciate it when you take the garbage out" and if that's not enough, offer him nice things ❤ It depends on how much you want it doing.
A thing about guys is they can be either clean messy clean or just messy, your husband must be a clean type of guy but some messy guys don’t exactly do that because they don’t have the same traits as those who over fixate or are really neat and clean, so they seem messy and sloppy when they are probably living totally fine, and another thing is not all but a lot of men are combative when given a direct order if it comes from a place they do not like, like a nagging wife or mother, it makes them feel disrespected or just makes them feel icky and generally makes them uncooperative which is an issue when you want something done, best way to get a man to do something is to ask them to do it, ask if they can do it before a certain time and add on something at the end that makes them feel better about themselves or more inclined to do it like a casual thanks.and if he doesn’t by forgetting or something still encouraging and just asking if he could remember next time while you take out the trash or have him do it to help him remember Just a tip from a guy who does get irate at being commanded
When I was a kid I heard some old man say "Happy Wife, Happy Life" and even at 9 I thought, "For who?". Women have become accustomed to dictating and its led to delusional expectations.
Yeah , happy wife happy life is terrible and part of why women allow themselves to be insufferable. The fact that the deal is "You have to do everything I want when I want it or I will use my position to make your life miserable" shows how unfair it is. As guys we are told we are responsible for our happiness. Maybe it is time to tell women the same.
Shocker. Me and my girl fought constantly until I beat it into her head (METAPHORICALLY!!!) that she needs to communicate what she wants and needs. We are the most chill couple now. Communicate. Period.
..hahaa, at least you were able to implement certain things in her head, Respect to that..!! 😅 She must really like you, idd clear communication leads to the sweet path of genuine Love..❤
If you want the garbage taken out on "the timeline I made up" try saying "Sweetie, would you take the garbage out?" My wife just asks me in plain English for things and miracle of miracles she gets what she wants. The problem with this woman is she wants her boyfriend/husband to read her mind. Men detest such women.
Don't agree . She said that he didn't do it on the timeline that they had discussed. Which means it wasn't an arbitrary timeline. And , also, he threw out an absurd example of 10 bags of garbage piled up to make her request sound unreasonable. I can't speak for all women on this, but the woman in a relationship is typically the manager of the home. She is the one trying to make sure all the things are getting done. The man in a relationship should be considerate and cooperative of her reasonable requests. This man further gaslights her by saying that she should give her man sex when he thinks about it. She did not "think" about the trash. She asked him verbally to take it out at a "time they discussed." This guy seems( by this short clip) a manipulative speaker. He's calm and calculative, like a boa constrictor slowly wrapping around your neck.
I would have to agree AND disagree with your response. I would say that the outcome is perfectly down the middle, but BECAUSE it is perfectly down the middle, The man might be more correct. While there may have been an agreed upon timeline to take the trash out, there can still be times where the time by which the trash needs to go out doesn't match "the man's given schedule" or whatever reason, such has how men potentially cope with stress by retreating to "the nothing box" (see Mark Gruger), or is feeling physical pain and is resting for a while before doing it, or just got home, or that he simply didn't see the trash yet, etc, and it is potentially the case that the woman might be too strict and not considering those things, and thus could potentially be too strict to only see it from the lens of "The women's simple request" because there can be a plethora of different things that are relevant. *Howbeit,* I would still assume that this would not be the more common outcome and that even if it is, it may still be the case that the man should overcome whatever he's dealing with for the moment in order to fulfill her request, so overall it would seem the woman might be more right, but not necessarily as right as she's presenting the situation. *This point goes to the woman!* 2. It isn't gaslighting because the woman admitted within their interaction that she does expect for her husband to be a mind reader. She admitted this when the man asked. Also, it isn't necessarily literally true that there was a set agreed upon time to take out the trash, nor was it necessarily a specified a calculated amount of trash required to take out the trash, but perhaps just a general amount by which both the man and woman could have their own subjective alternative interpretations, so it would potentially still require mind reading in this other context as well, even if there was an agreement. 3. I would have to disagree with your point about "the absurd example". This approach that he took within an absurd example is a legitimate debative strategy that is called in Latin: "Argumentum Ad Absurdum". The whole point is to communicate how a conclusion isn't necessarily rational By giving an absurd example in order to make the issue more apparent. 4. As she has her own schedule, regardless of whether there is an agreed upon schedule between the two, intimately speaking, the man could have his own schedule as well, and it would still be consistent to say that the woman would agree to join with him even if she doesn't feel like it. *It seems that this point goes to the man.* This would make the two equal in the amount of winning points. However, if the woman disagrees that she should give into her husband's desires every time he has them, then it seem to follow that the woman should be lenient regarding the trash as well, even if there was an agreement made. Thus, even though the amount of points are tied between the two, the nature by which the man's point is made applies to the woman's perspective and therefore causes the man's conclusion to be potentially more effective. Not necessarily more correct, but more crucial in effecting the conclusion. It seems that the ultimate conclusion or takeaway from this is to say that the husband and wife should show grace toward each other and be lenient and patient toward each other's shortcomings.
Or why cant she just take out the trash, instead of waiting on him. I feel like in this day and age women create issues that are not really that big of a deal. I guarantee you that if he is hungry, she doesn't stop what she's doing to cook or fix him a sandwich
@@hummus1874 So we should also go back to the time where dinner is expected perfectly on the table by the exact time the man shows up from work right? think thats a fair example. Pretty sure the point of the argument you missed entirely is learn to talk to your partner. If he is doing the hard physical labor is it really fair that she make him feel like trash for saying a simple line as "hey can you please get that"? He isnt manipulating anything, he just want to get a point across but obviously youre just refusing to get it like the lady in the video. If anyone is manipulating anything its you for saying the man isnt cooperative because the ladys husband (not the guy in the video) is still getting it done, he isnt refusing, most guys are just forgetful especially when tired from a long day.
Why doesn't she just take it out. Most likely he came home from work after 8 to 10 hr shift.she been sitting on her ass waiting for him to do it when he got home 😂😂😂😂😂
...shortly after saying she shouldn't have to tell him to do it. So seemingly they discussed it w/o talking and as it seem to be clear: without her caring if it fits his schedule of doing other stuff he need to do. She seem to be like my mother who thinks I wait in statis when she doesn't see me and defreeze when called. There is funny paradox as she is conscious of fact I have other things to do, but even if she knows I do things not related to her she seem to think I can fluently pause them every time she needs sth from me. Most hilarious thing I've said to her other than asking own parent to grow up? "No, I can't pause 150 people they won't just sit doing nothing for 0,5h, because you want me to do sth else"
That's why it's important to believe people when they show you who they are for the first time. She went from "I shouldn't have to tell him when to do it, he should already know" to "A timeline I made up" then covered it with "what WE discussed". If she's not lying about them discussing it then at the very least the first way she phrased it is how she truly feels. She's the decider and final authoritarian on this matter (in her mind).
We all know exactly how the "discussed conversation went" guilt, gaslighted, and manipulation until he said the words she wanted to hear since there was no other way to please her. If you want it done your way, do it yourself. Don't be an overbearing, guilt tripping control freak. Work together. If you notice that it is getting full, let him know in a way that is respectful and that he agrees is respectful, then let him get to it.
This is brilliantly executed Socratic Method. He calmly asks questions, understands her principles, questions those principles, then asks a question to challenge established beliefs. Genius.
The constant refrain I got; ' Without having to ask you !' even though I did it when asked. I asked for things constantly without getting them; asked repeatedly.
@yeetskeet691 ofcourse but people are talking about the specifics of the video as if they aren't scripted. If what your saying is something In yalls mind, then Comments would be saying " situations like this". Not "she's this! And she's that!" "B"
You know when I take out the garbage ? When I notice that I can't put anything else into the garbage can in the house and my wife hasn't done it already. You know when my wife takes out the garbage ? Same concept, when she notices that the trash is full and needs to be done and I haven't done it already . And then once the outside garbage cans get full, I 100% of the time , take it to the landfill.
This! If the trash is full, what the hell difference does it make WHO takes it out? Just do it and get it done. Put a new bag in and get yourself a cookie for a job well done.
My ex and I were exactly the same. Well, not exactly.... Switch the 2nd example to "when she notices it's full she told me to take it out" and then it's exactly the same.
She said she wasn't his mother but wishes to dictate what time is appropriate for him to take out trash like a mother they want control without responsibility and it is not good
You have to tell him if you want it done immediately. And use "would" instead of "could". Say, I need garbage taken out right now. Would you do that for me?". And you have to accept that maybe right now isn't a good time. Then you can compromise and say (for instance if the garbage can is full and you're cooking) "would taking it out in the next 15 min work?" And usually it does. It gives a man a time frame that isn't up in the air, and he understands the expectation that he is capable of fulfilling. Everybody likes to feel successful when they do something. Give a man a chance to fulfill your wishes. He will love it!
I empathize with tge woman. In the case of my ex, she actually would let her garbage just pile up. And she would talk to me like he is talking to her, like the person asking to take out the garbage is being unreasonable.
I've always made it clear; if you want it done your way and on your timeline you can do it yourself. If you want me to do it ill do it on my time in my way.
I just tell my wife to let me know when the bag is full, and I will get it. And she usually says, “ when you have time, the trash is ready.” It’s never a problem that way. No use letting little things become a stupid problem.
This gentleman's logic is similar to my husband's and fortunately he won't tolerate my BS. I figured out that trusting him to do it and being grateful for him and his wonderful presence in my life is conducive to harmony between us. I'm not perfect but I've noticeably improved myself each year since we got together. He's Gen X, I'm a millennial, there are 12 years between us, so he's got some maturity on me and I've got significant catching up to do. I'm totally doing it. This lady sounds like me a few years ago.
The sad thing is, all men need to learn this. I put up with the childish behaviour way too long, and I'm only now sorting it out. I was forced to mature fast so she never had to, then she resented my efforts. Finally when the time came for her to grow up and join me it was almost too much for her.
@Lace at least you have the level of awareness and the wisdom to grow and learn. Well done. My ex used to get upset for not mind reading and actually sent me IG videos titled "I shouldn't have to ask." 🙄
"I'm not your mother, I shouldn't have to ask" is disgusting. How about "You're not my mother, you have no authority over me, so stop acting like you do."
Yeah, when she said that I was like "so stop acting like his mother". Her whole thing sounded like a complete non-issue, she even said that if she left him alone the trash would still get taken out, just later than she would prefer, so she's picking fights for no reason and trying to exert control. If she really cares that much about when the trash gets taken out, she should do it herself.
Correct, she has no authority over you. Look at a grown man not offering to throw the trash that he helped contribute to. It's good enough she's managed to pick it all up, sweep it, and bag it. So you can't even offer to take the trash out.. and she's got to remind you about it. On top of that.. the audacity to bring "authority" into topic. If it's a family or a household, everyone chips in- even the kids. I don't see what authority has to do with it. The fact that a woman has to ask her spouse to do it, speaks volumes about the man's willingness to help and contribute. And the old man is absurd. He's making it sound like men need hours and days to just bring the trash outside. Don't fool yourselves into incompetence. It makes sense to do it at the very moment she asks.. so that you don't forget and it's out of the way. Besides leaving a bag full of trash in your kitchen does attract pests and rodents.
@@RapK-fu2sh she wasn't asking, she was ordering him to, that's where the entitlement to authority is shown. She wanted him to do a task in a specific way, which in her tiny brain she memorized all the step but didn't bother to instruct him how to do. And don't talk about household chores when she blasting him all over internet, she's being the child here and also Who hurt you? 😝
The worst is when you walk over to the bin, bend over to take out the bag, and that's the exact moment you get told. That bag is now never going anywhere.
@@J05hFontenotIt's an intern protest against being treated like a damn kid. We functions not like women do and most of them dont fkn get it. If they want something then they should fkn do it themselves. If we say do this or that they mostly get pissed or cant get it to work. Men are all or nothing even when "all" needs time it will be done. I dont want to be sexist but in general men are for big tasks and women are for little tasks. So our nature is to not give a single f about something like garbage 😂
Hell no it’s not a weird quirk… I was able to take care of myself before you met me and now you feel the need to be bossy forget that garbage I’ll get it in the morning
That’s his wife talking to him, and he’s giving her advice on how to respond to the ladies in her group that are saying this type of thing. They’re a really good couple.
Full response video on my TikTok, sorry I had to cut it short for UA-cam!
Please make a part 2 for us that don't have tiktok
Same, I am never going to do Tiktok... that's what cheap chinese clocks do that spy on me. ;P
Thanks for this 1st part (and your channel for that matter) but I second the request for a Part 2 since I don't have Tik Tok. Cheers.
I vehemently refuse to create a tiktok at all for any reason. And I would like to see the full clip.
I don’t have TikTok, and I don’t want that app on my iPhone. I love your content, Emily…do you think you could make a part 2 for us guys who love your content but don’t want TikTok on our devices? If not, it’s cool…I just figured it couldn’t hurt to ask nicely. Anyway, keep up the good videos.
Sending love & aloha from Honolulu to you and your entire ohana! Your little keiki is so adorable BTW! 🥰🤙🏽❤️🌈☀️
She’s not even listening to him. She is talking over him and didn’t realize when he pointed out that it was her arbitrary timeline.
He even did it in such a way that she was the one telling him what the whole problem was.
I don't know why women do and act like that. It is all in her time.
@parrj316 if you want things done on your timeliness 9/10 times you have to do it yourself
Because he leads her into thinking he's just gonna echo her, perfect entrapment there.
@@parrj316 I’m a woman and I lived with a mom who could be very rigid and controlling so I’m deliberately not like that. She absolutely had control issues from childhood abuse. The problem is, as she became an adult, it was her responsibility to address it, not the responsibility of the kids and her husband to bend every time she snapped her fingers.
She wasn’t looking for advice. She was looking for validation.
The only thing she was looking for was a reason to be mad at her husband.
nailed it.
She is right he is wrong = the bad man. Nothing to do with the garbage, just how she keeps her man=child in his place. Please if this is the new relationship model, let’s go back to the patriarchy model, which was in general practice not even close to how toxic this woman feels perfectly comfortable describing her feminist domination over men, perspective clearly is. This has unfortunately become more of the established relationship model with college educated women than not. Men should embrace the divorce when these women finally initiate it after having fully emasculated their husbands. Guys need meninism training to counter these modern women’s feminist domestic pet training tactics.
If you're not looking for advice, don't talk to a man. We validate ourselves through doing it, not talking about doing it.
This is women in general.
This isn’t about the garbage, it’s about control.
No, it's about exhaustion.
Or both
Right!
Taking out the garbage is symbolic-the garbage is filth to removed from the house and the man is the last one to touch said filth.
@@frankcastello9320I'm sure that man is very exhausted
“I am not his mother…” but I have no problem acting like it to get my way
I'm not his mother. I'm his Lord and Master.
@@DouglasNicholson-ff6epok sure but she gonna be outside when it rains and snow
When a wife nags her husband, trying to ride roughshod OVER him.....
.... by the will of God, and even like God, concerning his bride, the man...
.... he WILL resist her, unless or until he senses that she has some genuine (God fearing) reverence for him, whether she thinks her deserves it or not.
Quite often she chooses divorce over doing marriage God's way
Resisting her dominant behavior (may) be a godlike trait in him..
But she wants him to be her Dad and pay for everything.
She's probably acting like her own domineering mother.
It's not about the trash. It's about control and how she measures his love by how well he obeys.
100% true
That has to be a total dumpster fire of a marriage
True. Women measure a man's love by how much he does for her, and how quickly he does it. Personally, I don't want my love to be measured that way. Because all she's doing is destroying it.
Unfortunately many women view this as an indicator of a man’s loyalty and love for her. By his obedience to her demands for how and when he does things. Toxic attitude and they usually don’t even realize it. And likely also the kind to withhold intimacy to ‘punish’ him. These women basically treat their partner like a child instead of a mature adult that does not need her to take care of him or control him.
Spot on truth 👍
...and it only exists in her head.
He didn't take out the trash, he married it.
So if he puts a garbage bag over her head...😂😂
So she's the first trash he should have taken out? That checks out.....
Wicked. Funny and true at the same time. Lol.
Ooof good one lol
@@MomeGnomeyou really missed the point
“Not done on The timeline that WE discussed!”
I guarantee there was no discussion!
I am willing to bet money that there either wasn't even a mention or it was a monologue with no chance for him to speak.
No way in hell did that woman discuss anything with a guy
@angrydragonslayer Or, it was discussed in his absence. My wife says she tells me stuff all the time. I have no recollection of her ever saying anything. Either I have a doppelganger or she's 'telling' me when I'm asleep or not around.
@@HALO-2304 that's why i said "with" in my last sentence. I am all too familiar with it being "discussed" elsewhere.
Her voice tells you everything you need to know.
That she’s entitled Karen that never should’ve been married in the first place in the only reason she did it because she probably tricked successful man in the marrying her
Like this is the kind of woman that sits in her home on Facebook all day, and then complains to her husband after a day of work why the house isn’t clean
She sat at home all day in a dirty house, waiting to tell her husband why the house is not clean. That is the kind of woman she is.
A Nasty piece of work
The last 5 seconds are priceless.
It's criminal that we didn't get to hear her response after he dropped that gem
Touche`...spot on comeback
I love being single
It has its advantages @@GivingBackOnline
Bet you anything she'd turn the camera off because she didn't wanna embarrass herself to the world@@blackice7408
So she's not his mother but she wants him to do what she wants, when she wants, regardless of his thoughts on the matter? So she wants all the authority of being his mother with none of the responsibility that comes with being his mother. Sounds like a great mentality for a relationship.
I second this motion.
She sounds like an idiot.
She's certainly talking down to him in an insulting manner as if he's a child.
She wants to be his boss or more correctly his master.
She wants to be his boss without paying him.
Wife: This is the last time I'm going to tell you to take out the trash!
Husband: Thank goodness! I was tired of hearing it.
😂😂😂
He's been taking out the wrong trash.
This comment WINS!!! 😮
"I'm not his mother, I just want to treat him as though he's a child and I'm the boss."
💯🎯
lol for real
"I'm not his mother...But, wish I was!!!"
Yes. I'm quite active in multiple discussions about stuff like this. Do you know WHERE I discuss "if what you ask for have to be done exactely now or can be delayed and what could be the cause?" When I discuss forking "traditional/conservative/authotritarian vs modern/authoritive upbringing".
„And I want him to do exaclty what I want exactly how and when I want it so I basically want a robot servant child“
As I have said before. Being single is way better than being with the wrong one.
Frankly being single is better than being with anyone other than the PERFECT one, and the perfect one you never see.
@@Matthew10950 Yeah there's no such thing. People are flawed. No person is perfect. But being in a relationship with someone you desire, respect truly love and who loves you too is the single most rewarding thing in the world if you ask me. Nothing is better. Sports cars? Boats? Pfft. That's nothing. Not even cocaine feels as good. But it takes work and compromise and compassion and all that stuff. But it's well worth it if you ask me. I don't see how you can say that. Are you sure it's not your own standards? Or maybe it's one of those things where you have some ideas about women that aren't really realistic? I don't know. But I don't see how anyone could say that.
If they're all either the right one or the wrong one, then they'll all be the wrong one. Being in a relationship with a toxic person is hell. That's true. But the thing is, everyone has flaws. And those flaws eventually will start to get on your nerves. It's inevitable. The same is true for you. Relationship require compromise and work and all.
Relationships are like sleeping bags. When you first get in they feel so good. You feel comfy and cozy and you never want to leave. But eventually it always gets kinda hot. You feel strangled by it. Finally you feel like you'll go crazy if you can't just get one foot out. At that point it all just falls apart. So first it's important to get the right one. You don't use an arctic survival bag in Florida for example. But if you have the right one and you're still having problems, well, then the metaphor breaks down but in short, you have to look inward. Lol.
@PaulTheSkeptic I have a great wife. And great kids. Almost perfect. I've never met a married man that wouldn't rather be on his own. Not one, not ever, and I work a job where I talk to hundreds of men a week. Some of them are asshats, sure. But not all.
@@PaulTheSkeptic I think what he meant by perfect one is your actual soul mate who you were destined to be with for the rest of your life.
Either that or perfect one means God
She explained her own answer, truly amazing.
I love it -"it'll be done, but not on the timeleine that I made up.....or that we discussed". She doesn't actually care about anything besides making sure he follows her orders.
"How often do you think he wants intimacy and you should just do it when he thinks about it" TKO
Honestly a bad argument because it misses the point. Whether he wants anything or not is irrelevant - you don't treat someone like your personal servant. Period.
@jesseessej I totally agree with you that no one should be treated that way but his example of intimacy is perfect. Most women will only have sex when they want it (not in the mood, headache, tired, etc.), not when their man wants it. I do think, however, a better argument would be if she wanted it done so badly, why doesn't she just take it out herself instead of complaining about it not being done? Is she incapable? No. Lazy and controlling.
BOOOOOMMMM!!!!!
@@AWelter750taking out the trash and giving your body to someone are not the same things. First off. Second off some men are the ones that want sex less then their wives. So we don't know if that's the case here or not.
@@AWelter750maybe she does a lot of other things around the house and it's one job he can do. Maybe they even both work like a lot of families and yet she's doing all the household duties and he can't take out the trash. You have no idea from this one clip what their life is like.
When women do this is an expression of contempt and underlying disrespect to her husband.
Truth, she is acting like a sh1tty boss
Yep which is why she should soon be single
I think it can be unintentional. The real tell is, if you calmly point out what she's doing, is she reasonable and willing to work out an agreement? Or does she dig in her heels and refuse to take accountability?
@@bgrego88 ... at which time SHE can take out the garbage....
No. It's disrespectful and this has been tolerated by her husband. Half of the problem is not telling her to quit the nagging wife act
He digs the problem very well by asking the right questions.
You quickly realise it is about how she wants it done, not that it doesn't get done.
Expecting someone to be a mind reader is at the heart of many relationship woes!
this is not about when the garbage goes out, this is about her wanting him to always be on standby instead of being able to focus on his own schedule.
Yep, short leash.
Yeah, I'd be just as annoyed. I'd tell her, "I'll get the garbage out the night before garbage pickup, not at 6 PM because then bylaw will get involved and fine us. You wouldn't want that on your conscious now, would you?"
This is definitely a control issue.
Bingo!
Indentured servitude...
Basically “I want it done my
Way and I’ll throw a fit if it isn’t done my way, but iM nOt hIs MoThEr so I don’t have to communicate when I want it done.”
Exaxtly this
Basically but hey if she wants the garbage out she has hands and legs snd eyes she can do it hersdlf
To me, it sounds as if the woman IS the garbage 😂; just saying..
@@greyberet1 once you know you know
@@greyberet1 that's because she is
You know that 100% went over her head.
So grateful my wife and I are older than 12 mentally so we don’t argue about these things
I never understood why I was so annoyed with taking out the garbage when asked but not annoyed when I took the garbage out myself. 🤯
When you are asked to take it out, it's a command and it's negative. When you take it out yourself, it's voluntary and positive.
Because you shouldn't be taking orders from a female
@@StefanVeenstra Yes. A lot of commands are spoken as if a question. But the only answer is yes
Seems like he's throwing out the wrong garbage.
@@twistedlimb4053legend
Im suprised he hasnt taken the garbage out either, if my garbage sounded like that id toss it out without any questions asked !
LMAO
Now you are learning
Well in
👍 😂😂😂
Is she the garbage ?
That beard is just Majestic.
I was raised that the garbage gets taken out when the garbage Needs to be taken out. It's Everybody's job. The Garbage decides when it needs to be taken out. We won't be having this talk again.
He who tops it off, drops it off.
When you see the can can't take no more without being squashed,take it out and put a new bag.
@@ECSDVS - Yes. Exactly. Thank you 👌👍💪
Thank you. Its a really simple fact. Its full or it is not. It is garbage day or it is not.
That means instead of the wife crying… she needs to just take it out.. 😘
@@deltoro8816 So well all can conclude youre a lazy fuck that just wont raise a finger.
"I don't want to be his mother" ... Acts exactly like a mother.
Specifically, acts like my entitled, overbearing, emotionally abusive mother.
Acts like a mother? That is a miserable harpie, not a mother
Sometimes people just don't realize their own behavior is what is really bothering them. 😅
Shumtimes you need to give them a little shlap
🧔🏻
Yes. My mother is like that and honestly? Even she would probably see the issue here, claiming arents can demand stuff to be done imidiatelly from a kid but he's not her kid so she can't.
I love the way this guy is gently trying to hold up a mirror to show her the problem... But she's so blind she can't see it.
Underrated comment. WELL SAID 👏
Ouch! You nailed that comment.
They never do.
@@MomeGnome The comparison is that she wants one thing on demand when she wants it without telling him and he's supposed to know it. He has the same desire, for intimacy, but she doesn't know it either and she, probably, doesn't think that's wrong. Understand?
No, she's deaf
Take out the trash. Meanwhile, the garbage can is only 3/4 full, and you're in the middle of unpacking the takeout.
Me and my wife both take it out and neither of us complains about it.
I just saw a post yesterday of a girl with ALL of the girls in the comments agreeing with her that women are tired of HAVING to constantly tell their men what to do. Let that sink in. I was so incredibly tempted to say “yeah I’m tired of women not doing what I tell them to do when I want it done I don’t want to be their father why do I have to constantly tell women what to do?” just to see their heads explode from hypocrisy.
They'll just say you hate women and your a misogynist. I usually just agree with them now.
Edit: Those saying I am just encouraging them are only seeing it the way they want it to be. Truth is these girls have a plan and an MO and they learned it long before me. It's their survival mechanism and me not feeding it instead of engaging into and vindicating their manipulation may actually teach them that it doesn't work because they don't get the response they want.
Getting bothered and challenging them is what they want. So they can point and say see? Violent. Controlling.
Don't feed the animals.
@@brookeshane3170 no
Dew it
Don’t encourage the delusion never miss out on opportunity to call people on their bullshit cause it is funny as hell when they try to rationalize it then resort to name calling like the immature people they are. Calling it acting like a child is honestly an insult to children at this point.
Everyone has lost it in the sauce. Both men and women jeeeesus 😅
The modern feminist bull crap and boys idolizing scam artist womanizers created a retarded eco system of toxic waste.
People online acting like a woman is above making a dude some lunch or doing the laundry because “iM nOt hIs mOMMa!!😡😡😡” or some crap like that 😂
And then we have some guys just straight up denying female nature and saying “yeah I won’t allow that”
Yeah, the fuck you will dingus 😂
It’s all about money sex and “love”
What about teamwork? Where’d that go?
“He should be a mind reader”. “Yeah”. Speechless.
"If you loved me, you'd know why I'm upset!"
@@ostlandrbecause you're a woman. Hehe
Hey as the person who takes the trash out in my house I can say that you don't have to be a mind reader ,I just know what day to take out the trash
@@sethidk6439Agreed and it’s generally the same time EVERY TIME
That's why the blow up sex doll industry is gargantuan, because learning to be a mind reader isn't reasonable.
Holy hell, this is my situation. 😂 I have to laugh about it as I try to explain to my wife. “You’re just supposed to know!” She says. “No babe. I failed miserably in mind-reading class. And why don’t you know when I want to be intimate?”
'How often do you think he wants intimacy?'
Not all heroes wear capes.
It's not the quote, it's the tone he gives 😂 someone please send him a cape
I woulda said head, at least then she wouldn't be talking about the garbage
With her? Not often.
100% ;)
That statement was a checkmate on its own
Women be treating their partners like unwanted step children.
As a woman, I'm sorry for our behavior 😔
I know how being an "unwanted step child" feels, first hand!!, which is why I'm single, you can never trust a woman!
@@Peyton3176 What are you even apologising for? You know what.. her husband was probably rolled up on the couch watching video games while she was cleaning up after dinner, putting the kids to sleep, doing the dishes, cleaning up the kitchen sink. That ONE thing she needed him to do was take the trash out and he has the AUDACITY to complain and bargain about timing? How complex is it anyway?
Well John, it blows my mind that you actually need to negotiate a 10 hour window just to take the trash. Hmm.. maybe I would like to negotiate the time I decide to cook dinner.
@@RapK-fu2sh I guess you do have a good point. You kinda changed my opinion there, if he's being told to do something, he better do it. I'm your wife, not your mommy. Some men nowadays need to learn how to pick up after themselves. I appreciate the support 😅❤️
@@Peyton3176 Glad you can see where I'm coming from!❤
It really is hilarious how the old guy was talking about "timeline". She cleaned up the house and the trash bag is full, meaning it's time to take it out.
How many days does a guy need to take a bag of trash outside? It's not a complex home-building project! Men be purposely making it sound like women are unreasonable and then they label being asked to help with ONE chore as "unwanted step-child" treatment. How dramatic!
I don't know why women have accepted such disrespect from men.
My ex took it out before I arrived home from work, first time in 20 years, so I thanked her. " I don't know why you're thanking me" she replied, "I always do it". "GAS, GAS, GAS! TAKE COVER!!" 🔥
My husband asked me years ago, what do I need to do for you not to ever ask for me to do shores anymore? I said, the housekeeper needs to come 2 times per week.Now, I send our laundry 🧺 to be washed and folded at the cleaners.We no longer have arguments and have more time to spend looking after our child ☯️
”I'm not his mother.” Then you can't boss him around like you are.
Are Mothers supposed to boss around their offspring? Is that normal?
@@Sakanx Uh... Yeah? That's basically the whole first half of your childhood.
"Don't go there, it's dangerous. Don't touch that, it's hot/sharp/pointy. Don't eat that, it's poison. Use the toilet sweety, don't let go in your pants. You WILL eat your peas and broccoli. You have to go to school because it's important for reasons you're too small to understand. No, you can't just eat nothing but pancakes baby, that's not good for you. Do your homework. Your room looks terrible, clean it. Put your toys away when you're done with them."
Now, HOW they boss you around is debatable and a big part of parenting, but the bossing around is required unless we want natural selection to get a whole lot more brutal.
@@Sakanx Please don't have children. We have enough spoiled entitled d-bags ruining things now.
@@Sakanxyeah, parents should, that's the whole point. They're kids they know nothing, you HAVE to boss em, they aren't your equal, life is dangerous and they should listen.
Women typically think they’re superior yet for 1000s of years men were in charge , building , leading, innovating , renovating , etc
I tell my husband “thank you , I appreciate it!” He thanks me for simple things I do. Amazing that something so simple goes so far. Best 28 years ever.
Awesome
Thank you
You give me hope
My wife and I do the same. Been together 34 years. Married 29 of them this coming June, and still going strong
This! Just expressing a level of gratitude and appreciation will create a positive relationship and increase your man’s likelihood of doing kind things again
I’ve heard many people say you should get a thank you for the stuff you “expected to do” regularly. My wife also says thank for the little things like cleaning a toilet, or trash, and honestly it’s the kindest thing. makes me more in love with her simply feeling appreciated for the little stuff. IMO it’s never a fault to show a significant other kindness and appreciation for the consistent little gestures, “chores” or otherwise. It also makes me realize how much someone may not hear these words of appreciation and gratitude in their job or daily life simply by how positive I felt after hearing them.
Been with my wife for 40 years. Everything starts with “Please” and ends with “Thank you.” Everything is a request, not a demand. We share in the work, and we help each other out.
It’s certainly managed to work well for us for 40 years.
Maybe some others here ought to give it a try.
I live this guy from now on
I hate that it was cut off so soon. I was looking forward to the 30 seconds of silence on her end followed by a bunch of “uh” and “I”
This guy is savage. He knew she wasn't listening.
Why would anyone listen to an illogical argument?
@@rachelputney5243, he was perfectly logical. It was the shrieking banshee who was illogical.
@@rachelputney5243 This argument is perfectly logical. Women just do not like the example because it uses her own logic against her. Women will only have sex with their partner when she wants to have sex--not when he wants it. Yet, she expects him to do this task when she wants it. For the first scenario, the first thing many women will say is I am not your slave when saying to sex. It applies in the other scenario as well. You husband is not your slave either and you are not his mother. Nagging women end up with husbands that tune them out after awhile.
@@don8668 that’s just ur experience not every other man’s experience. I’ve had plenty of sex with my partner when I didn’t want to. 🙄 I’m just curious what makes you think you could speak for women anyway?
@@don8668 shut up and take out the trash. Lmao
She is absolutely correct. He has failed to put her on the curb.
I see what you did there. 😂
Had me in the first half ngl
"He should be a mind reader"
"Yeah" without a hint of irony.
She said discussed, but before that, she slipped and said the time schedule I made up.
As you get older you realize peace is worth being alone.
absolutely true!!!!
100% When I was dating, married, it was just nonstop disruption and requests
The real peace is when the work week is done, I do whatever the hell I want to do on the weekend, and there's no guilt or grief for what I chose. Also, I have to deal with the consequences if I procrastinated on garage cleaning on my own time frame. Priceless!!
Only women bring stress to relationships 😢😢
I like the peace I have when walking out to the garbage can. Can be a long time if I walk slowly :)
Garbage is not the issue - it’s a symptom of something bigger. There is either entitlement, resentment, or a pretext she is using to exit the relationship.
It's entitlement, she thinks things need to be done her way, on her time. Absolute entitled jack ass she is.
100%
Precisely
Exit faster pls.
Mr. Simpy McSimp in her DMs already
I've had this exact same discussion at home and actually used this exact phrasing.
The problem is not that I don't or won't but simply that it is not done on her schedule.
My solution was and still is that if it means so much to you that it be done at the exact moment you demand, then do it yourself.
There are several things I do myself because I do it the way I prefer it done: my laundry (how it is washed, dried, folded and hung up or placed in a drawer), my ironing, cooking certain meals, etc.
How would it go over if I complained about the way she did something she perceived as helping me? Say washing my vehicle and not that she missed a spot but she did it differently and it was clean but I didn't like how she went about it. How would that go over? Right.
Boss B's die alone for a reason.
“On the timeline I made up……or that we discussed” 😂 she realized her mistake there
could have been made up by her as household manager, and then they discussed it. There is no way to know from this clip.
Yup. I know someone that went to marriage counseling and this was brought up. Therapist told the wife that she can’t expect another adult to just jump at the snap of her finger and do what she wants when she wants it done. She never went back after she was told she was wrong.
Yep. My ex-wife hated our marriage counselor because he didn't roll over and tell her that she was right about everything and anything. He told me in private that I need to get divorced and not save the marriage.
Funny cause I had the same experience with my ex. She was a feminist and refused to see a bloke so we got this chick doctor and she went on to tell my ex how bad her attitude was. I laughed all the way home because I knew we where never going back.
From what I hear most women hate therapy because they get held accountable for their part in the failure of a relationship
Kind of a sin for the Theripist to say “you are wrong”. That makes people jump ship real fast
@bird266 it's only okay to tell the man he's wrong?
He nailed it completely. It never was about the trash.
No it's not.
She's annoyed with him.
She doesn't respect him.
She needs to berate him to justify her feelings ...that she may not love him anymore.
He needs to check her. If that doesn't work, he should leave her because it's too damn late.
Been with my wife for 40 years. Everything starts with “Please” and ends with “Thank you.” Everything is a request, not a demand. We share in the work, and we help each other out.
It’s certainly managed to work well for us for 40 years.
Maybe some others here ought to give it a try.
"He is not doing it on the schedule that we discussed"... We all know exactly how that "conversation" went. Gaslighting, manipulation, and controlling. Don't disrespect your man if you want to have a happy marriage. If he has agreed and without coercion truly agreed that is his job around the house then you need to also figure out a way that he can know it is full and have a resonable time frame to get to it.
"I want you to do the work, exactly the way I want it, exactly when I want it, and without me explaining any of this."
Sounds like 100% of the jobs I've ever worked tbh and not all of them were run by women 😂
@@TheDXJC56 Well to be fair in one case you are getting paid for it. In the other case you are not.
@@anthonyju6392 True, but that doesn't make one situation any less frustrating to deal with than the other unfortunately 😂
@@TheDXJC56Being paid makes a huge fucking difference. If I wasn't being paid to do my job I wouldn't do it at all. Likewise if a women gives me no reason to tolerate her presence in my life then I'm not doing it at all 😂
@@peopleofearth6250 Except being paid to read minds doesn't make it any more possible.
The amount of men that just bowed to this attitude is why i plan on staying single.
"I'm not his mother" is so stupid, if the man said "I'm not her father" and didn't take care of chores or anything dealing with the finances watch how quickly women like that act like you're a tyrant
You made an assumption based on your position. Which lends plenty of oversight. First, when you said "men that bowed", it would have more accurate if you said "boys bowed".. Second, boys argue like girls.(I'm not her father) Apparently, you need a daddy to. Quit whining about your lack and then projecting it on females.
Given that this is a common complaint among women (not just this one specifically but the category of things similar to it), I'd say a majority of men are not bowing to this attitude.
@@brassman7599It's wrong to give in. She's emasculating him. IE: her wishes are more important than his schedule. They should come up with an agreement, and not mention it again.
@@jameskittrell6486 That was Emily's opinion too, and I agree.
You made an assumption based on your position. Which lends plenty of oversight. First, when you said "men that bowed", it would have more accuracy if you said "boys bowed".. Second, boys argue like girls.(I'm not her father) Apparently, you need a daddy to. Quit whining about your lack and then projecting it on females.
It's EXACTLY THAT!!!! When SHE wants it done......
Years ago my wife use to make this complaint. Early on in the relationship she would say, "Why do I always have to tell you to take out the trash?" My answer, "Because you think I'm listening but I've been responsible for taking out the trash since childhood and my mom never had to tell me to take out the trash!" She never mentioned the trash after that exchange.
Some females love talking to you like a child, which is insulting af.
I could never be in a relationship with a gal like that, no matter how hot she is.
Thankfully UA-cam is a censoring piece of trash so we can't even politely post our opinions anymore without the comment being deleted for no reason.
My partner is the “10 bag will stack up” & we’ve now missed collection day 😅🤣😂. I don’t like having to ask multiple times so I don’t, it’s been 7 years, the day hasn’t changed. 90% of the time, if I’m at home, I’m running them out close the deadline 😅🤣😂. He has a worse memory than a gold fish (he will say this himself) so I can’t really get mad nor do I 😅🤣😂. You can give him a list to go a shop 5mins away, put it in his pocket, & he’ll forget he has a list 😅🤣😂.
Hope all who happen to read this are having a lovely day/night/life❣️
@@MorbidClown He has you trained 🤣🤣🤣
@MorbidClown a good man will be doing enough already that it won't matter if he doesn't take the garbage out. As a woman, I take the trash out because I am perfectly capable of doing so and my husband does alot already.
My husband usually takes the garbage out because it’s heavy and gets stuck and I usually do the dishes because he hates doing them but sometimes he doesn’t take out the garbage, so I’ll do it. just like I don’t do the dishes sometimes, so he’ll do them. We help each other 🤷🏻♀️ I don’t understand why it has to be such a big deal.
Control, it's mostly about control.
That's called a real marriage/partnership. I'm with you, I don't understand why people are in these "relationships"
Oh wow, you alternate work because it needs getting done?! You see I do the dishes otherwise they pile up in the sink, on the island, on the kitchen table, couch, wife’s work desk, etc. “I” do them. No one else. I also take out the garbage. My wife would never ever ever take out the garbage or do dishes.
@@anonymoose9315has your wife never done them or this is a recent thing? If it is, maybe she is depressed?
@@zoelenss9182 not depressed, severe OCD.
The intimacy argument is perfect.
My husband is fab about taking it out. He's actually fab all around, and I'm so, so grateful. I think she should focus on all the good things he does do. If he hasn't taken it out by the time she wants it doing, she could be super passive aggressive, and announce "I'm taking the garbage out!" She could just take it out, or she could say some along the lines of "I really appreciate it when you take the garbage out" and if that's not enough, offer him nice things ❤ It depends on how much you want it doing.
A thing about guys is they can be either clean messy clean or just messy, your husband must be a clean type of guy but some messy guys don’t exactly do that because they don’t have the same traits as those who over fixate or are really neat and clean, so they seem messy and sloppy when they are probably living totally fine, and another thing is not all but a lot of men are combative when given a direct order if it comes from a place they do not like, like a nagging wife or mother, it makes them feel disrespected or just makes them feel icky and generally makes them uncooperative which is an issue when you want something done, best way to get a man to do something is to ask them to do it, ask if they can do it before a certain time and add on something at the end that makes them feel better about themselves or more inclined to do it like a casual thanks.and if he doesn’t by forgetting or something still encouraging and just asking if he could remember next time while you take out the trash or have him do it to help him remember
Just a tip from a guy who does get irate at being commanded
When I was a kid I heard some old man say "Happy Wife, Happy Life" and even at 9 I thought, "For who?".
Women have become accustomed to dictating and its led to delusional expectations.
Yeah , happy wife happy life is terrible and part of why women allow themselves to be insufferable.
The fact that the deal is "You have to do everything I want when I want it or I will use my position to make your life miserable" shows how unfair it is.
As guys we are told we are responsible for our happiness. Maybe it is time to tell women the same.
Happy Wife, Happy Life. Happy Husband, WTF is he doing now!? No thanks.
Shocker. Me and my girl fought constantly until I beat it into her head (METAPHORICALLY!!!) that she needs to communicate what she wants and needs. We are the most chill couple now. Communicate. Period.
..hahaa, at least you were able to implement certain things in her head, Respect to that..!! 😅 She must really like you, idd clear communication leads to the sweet path of genuine Love..❤
Why do all women believe and expect things without communicating
I’d add a caveat: “I’m not in the military anymore. I’m not going to be ordered around like a private in my own fcking home.”
If you want the garbage taken out on "the timeline I made up" try saying "Sweetie, would you take the garbage out?" My wife just asks me in plain English for things and miracle of miracles she gets what she wants.
The problem with this woman is she wants her boyfriend/husband to read her mind. Men detest such women.
I did this with mine, but literally.
Men listen to understand. Women listen to respond.
She's not listening to listen. She's listening to respond. And that's a problem most women have.
Brilliant argument. Calm. Sharp. To the point. Getting her deep into her false reasoning first.
Don't agree .
She said that he didn't do it on the timeline that they had discussed. Which means it wasn't an arbitrary timeline.
And , also, he threw out an absurd example of 10 bags of garbage piled up to make her request sound unreasonable.
I can't speak for all women on this, but the woman in a relationship is typically the manager of the home. She is the one trying to make sure all the things are getting done. The man in a relationship should be considerate and cooperative of her reasonable requests.
This man further gaslights her by saying that she should give her man sex when he thinks about it. She did not "think" about the trash. She asked him verbally to take it out at a "time they discussed."
This guy seems( by this short clip) a manipulative speaker. He's calm and calculative, like a boa constrictor slowly wrapping around your neck.
I would have to agree AND disagree with your response. I would say that the outcome is perfectly down the middle, but BECAUSE it is perfectly down the middle, The man might be more correct.
While there may have been an agreed upon timeline to take the trash out, there can still be times where the time by which the trash needs to go out doesn't match "the man's given schedule" or whatever reason, such has how men potentially cope with stress by retreating to "the nothing box" (see Mark Gruger), or is feeling physical pain and is resting for a while before doing it, or just got home, or that he simply didn't see the trash yet, etc, and it is potentially the case that the woman might be too strict and not considering those things, and thus could potentially be too strict to only see it from the lens of "The women's simple request" because there can be a plethora of different things that are relevant. *Howbeit,* I would still assume that this would not be the more common outcome and that even if it is, it may still be the case that the man should overcome whatever he's dealing with for the moment in order to fulfill her request, so overall it would seem the woman might be more right, but not necessarily as right as she's presenting the situation. *This point goes to the woman!*
2. It isn't gaslighting because the woman admitted within their interaction that she does expect for her husband to be a mind reader. She admitted this when the man asked. Also, it isn't necessarily literally true that there was a set agreed upon time to take out the trash, nor was it necessarily a specified a calculated amount of trash required to take out the trash, but perhaps just a general amount by which both the man and woman could have their own subjective alternative interpretations, so it would potentially still require mind reading in this other context as well, even if there was an agreement.
3. I would have to disagree with your point about "the absurd example". This approach that he took within an absurd example is a legitimate debative strategy that is called in Latin: "Argumentum Ad Absurdum". The whole point is to communicate how a conclusion isn't necessarily rational By giving an absurd example in order to make the issue more apparent.
4. As she has her own schedule, regardless of whether there is an agreed upon schedule between the two, intimately speaking, the man could have his own schedule as well, and it would still be consistent to say that the woman would agree to join with him even if she doesn't feel like it. *It seems that this point goes to the man.*
This would make the two equal in the amount of winning points. However, if the woman disagrees that she should give into her husband's desires every time he has them, then it seem to follow that the woman should be lenient regarding the trash as well, even if there was an agreement made. Thus, even though the amount of points are tied between the two, the nature by which the man's point is made applies to the woman's perspective and therefore causes the man's conclusion to be potentially more effective. Not necessarily more correct, but more crucial in effecting the conclusion.
It seems that the ultimate conclusion or takeaway from this is to say that the husband and wife should show grace toward each other and be lenient and patient toward each other's shortcomings.
Or why cant she just take out the trash, instead of waiting on him. I feel like in this day and age women create issues that are not really that big of a deal. I guarantee you that if he is hungry, she doesn't stop what she's doing to cook or fix him a sandwich
@@hummus1874 So we should also go back to the time where dinner is expected perfectly on the table by the exact time the man shows up from work right? think thats a fair example. Pretty sure the point of the argument you missed entirely is learn to talk to your partner. If he is doing the hard physical labor is it really fair that she make him feel like trash for saying a simple line as "hey can you please get that"? He isnt manipulating anything, he just want to get a point across but obviously youre just refusing to get it like the lady in the video. If anyone is manipulating anything its you for saying the man isnt cooperative because the ladys husband (not the guy in the video) is still getting it done, he isnt refusing, most guys are just forgetful especially when tired from a long day.
Why doesn't she just take it out. Most likely he came home from work after 8 to 10 hr shift.she been sitting on her ass waiting for him to do it when he got home 😂😂😂😂😂
I like how she changed it up from "The timeline I made up" to "What we discussed".
...shortly after saying she shouldn't have to tell him to do it.
So seemingly they discussed it w/o talking and as it seem to be clear: without her caring if it fits his schedule of doing other stuff he need to do.
She seem to be like my mother who thinks I wait in statis when she doesn't see me and defreeze when called. There is funny paradox as she is conscious of fact I have other things to do, but even if she knows I do things not related to her she seem to think I can fluently pause them every time she needs sth from me.
Most hilarious thing I've said to her other than asking own parent to grow up? "No, I can't pause 150 people they won't just sit doing nothing for 0,5h, because you want me to do sth else"
You can tell by her voice how much intimacy happens in that household!!!
'The timeline I made up'
'Or that we discussed'
She had a moment of clairty I think and quickly covered with something that sounds softer lol
Surprised no one else seems to be commenting on this. It's the single most telling line in the whole clip.
That SHE discussed and he didn't actually agree to.
@@ronarprefect7709that she discussed with HERSELF
That's why it's important to believe people when they show you who they are for the first time. She went from "I shouldn't have to tell him when to do it, he should already know" to "A timeline I made up" then covered it with "what WE discussed".
If she's not lying about them discussing it then at the very least the first way she phrased it is how she truly feels. She's the decider and final authoritarian on this matter (in her mind).
We all know exactly how the "discussed conversation went" guilt, gaslighted, and manipulation until he said the words she wanted to hear since there was no other way to please her. If you want it done your way, do it yourself. Don't be an overbearing, guilt tripping control freak. Work together. If you notice that it is getting full, let him know in a way that is respectful and that he agrees is respectful, then let him get to it.
If you want it done when you want it done. THEN YOU SHOULD DO IT!
Ok. When you want your dinner ready, you should just go ahead and make dinner for everyone.
@@vaska1999agreed
@@vaska1999 you're one of those, huh? I'll bet your husband LOVES you
@@vaska1999Kek dinner time is typically a usual time daily while taking out the trash is dependent on usage. Try again, Vaska.
You do know plenty of men know to cook right? @@vaska1999
This is brilliantly executed Socratic Method. He calmly asks questions, understands her principles, questions those principles, then asks a question to challenge established beliefs. Genius.
The constant refrain I got; ' Without having to ask you !' even though I did it when asked. I asked for things constantly without getting them; asked repeatedly.
His beard is phenomenal.
A markhor in the making.
It's majestic! So we'll shaped and groomed.
That beard is straight out of a Samarian bronze mask.
That’s what I was thinking 😂
agreed
Bearded bro said it!!!! 🎉
I had that problem for 20 years. I don’t have that problem anymore. Enjoy your strong independence ladies.
I take out the garbage when I think the bag is full. If you want it thrown out sooner, YOU DO IT!!!
She demands respect, but yet refuses to give it back.
You don't deserve it. You EARN it.
YES!!!
The economy of respect. To get respect, you gotta give respect.
It's fake
@@knoxxsavage6288this video may be so, but this happens irl b
@yeetskeet691 ofcourse but people are talking about the specifics of the video as if they aren't scripted. If what your saying is something In yalls mind, then Comments would be saying " situations like this". Not "she's this! And she's that!" "B"
"Not on the timeline I made up... I mean that we discussed." Freudian slip right there.
CODE FOR: I I I ME ME ME TELL him what to do.
His last question caused her to shut her mouth for the first time in decades.
Take it out, yourself!!
And stay out there with it.....
You know when I take out the garbage ? When I notice that I can't put anything else into the garbage can in the house and my wife hasn't done it already. You know when my wife takes out the garbage ? Same concept, when she notices that the trash is full and needs to be done and I haven't done it already . And then once the outside garbage cans get full, I 100% of the time , take it to the landfill.
This! If the trash is full, what the hell difference does it make WHO takes it out? Just do it and get it done. Put a new bag in and get yourself a cookie for a job well done.
My ex and I were exactly the same. Well, not exactly.... Switch the 2nd example to "when she notices it's full she told me to take it out" and then it's exactly the same.
It's not about the garbage, but her wanting authority. She'll find something else to be upset about if he took out the trash before she saw it.
EXACTALLY!
I can hear it now...."Why did you take out the trash, it wasn't full yet."
Why find something else? She can dredge up and recycle grievances from years past.
She said she wasn't his mother but wishes to dictate what time is appropriate for him to take out trash like a mother they want control without responsibility and it is not good
The problem is never the problem.
You have to tell him if you want it done immediately. And use "would" instead of "could". Say, I need garbage taken out right now. Would you do that for me?". And you have to accept that maybe right now isn't a good time. Then you can compromise and say (for instance if the garbage can is full and you're cooking) "would taking it out in the next 15 min work?" And usually it does. It gives a man a time frame that isn't up in the air, and he understands the expectation that he is capable of fulfilling. Everybody likes to feel successful when they do something. Give a man a chance to fulfill your wishes. He will love it!
She wants the authority of a man, the treatment of a traditional woman, while having the responsibility of a child.
This ‘I am not his mother’ phrase comes up all the time, while expecting father treatment.
The only response is, "that's right... she's not." And a very stern, disapproving glare.
@@littleman6950 sure enough, men do not wish to be their fathers either.
Mock and Belittle. Guilt. Blame and Shame. These are too many women's love language.
I was with a woman like this for way too long. The ones who demand the most are the least willing to reciprocate
Boyyyyyyyy you better preach preacher‼️‼️ you ain’t wrote no lies
A relationship has always been a man giving his 110% and a woman giving her 110% that’s the way it should be anyways
@@swisscheeseplease97Where exactly do you find one of those?
@@subvertedworldhave you tried the 50's yet? 😂
@@a-man4037 have you tried… getting a life? Lol 😂
I empathize with tge woman. In the case of my ex, she actually would let her garbage just pile up. And she would talk to me like he is talking to her, like the person asking to take out the garbage is being unreasonable.
I've always made it clear; if you want it done your way and on your timeline you can do it yourself. If you want me to do it ill do it on my time in my way.
Golden responses.
That woman is absolutely nuts.
I just tell my wife to let me know when the bag is full, and I will get it. And she usually says, “ when you have time, the trash is ready.” It’s never a problem that way. No use letting little things become a stupid problem.
When my wife's says (when you have time) means could you do it now.
OMG!!! 🫨 A REAL MAN!!! I thought they were all extinct!!! 😱 They DO exist!!!! 🫨
@@rachelputney5243 Well, if that’s all it takes to be a real man, I’m in good shape 😂😂😂
Are you incapable of seeing for yourself when the rubbish is full?? Why does a full grown adult man need to be told a task needs doing??
@@sakuracherry7268. Take your pills and calm down please.
This gentleman's logic is similar to my husband's and fortunately he won't tolerate my BS. I figured out that trusting him to do it and being grateful for him and his wonderful presence in my life is conducive to harmony between us. I'm not perfect but I've noticeably improved myself each year since we got together. He's Gen X, I'm a millennial, there are 12 years between us, so he's got some maturity on me and I've got significant catching up to do. I'm totally doing it. This lady sounds like me a few years ago.
The sad thing is, all men need to learn this. I put up with the childish behaviour way too long, and I'm only now sorting it out.
I was forced to mature fast so she never had to, then she resented my efforts. Finally when the time came for her to grow up and join me it was almost too much for her.
@Lace at least you have the level of awareness and the wisdom to grow and learn. Well done. My ex used to get upset for not mind reading and actually sent me IG videos titled "I shouldn't have to ask." 🙄
Thank you for doing this!
I just love your content, keep doing what you’re doing. 😊
"I'm not your mother, I shouldn't have to ask" is disgusting. How about "You're not my mother, you have no authority over me, so stop acting like you do."
Yeah, when she said that I was like "so stop acting like his mother". Her whole thing sounded like a complete non-issue, she even said that if she left him alone the trash would still get taken out, just later than she would prefer, so she's picking fights for no reason and trying to exert control. If she really cares that much about when the trash gets taken out, she should do it herself.
Correct, she has no authority over you. Look at a grown man not offering to throw the trash that he helped contribute to. It's good enough she's managed to pick it all up, sweep it, and bag it. So you can't even offer to take the trash out.. and she's got to remind you about it.
On top of that.. the audacity to bring "authority" into topic. If it's a family or a household, everyone chips in- even the kids. I don't see what authority has to do with it. The fact that a woman has to ask her spouse to do it, speaks volumes about the man's willingness to help and contribute.
And the old man is absurd. He's making it sound like men need hours and days to just bring the trash outside. Don't fool yourselves into incompetence. It makes sense to do it at the very moment she asks.. so that you don't forget and it's out of the way. Besides leaving a bag full of trash in your kitchen does attract pests and rodents.
@@RapK-fu2sh Who hurt you?
@@jimjohnson394 who hurt you? You're the one who brought up "authority" just to shirk from responsibilities.
@@RapK-fu2sh she wasn't asking, she was ordering him to, that's where the entitlement to authority is shown.
She wanted him to do a task in a specific way, which in her tiny brain she memorized all the step but didn't bother to instruct him how to do.
And don't talk about household chores when she blasting him all over internet, she's being the child here and also
Who hurt you? 😝
The worst is when you walk over to the bin, bend over to take out the bag, and that's the exact moment you get told. That bag is now never going anywhere.
Thats called pathological demand avoidance. Its an autistic trait. The more you know 💫
My God... I thought I was the only one. My wife thinks I need to get over that and that it's just some weird quirk.
@@J05hFontenotIt's an intern protest against being treated like a damn kid. We functions not like women do and most of them dont fkn get it. If they want something then they should fkn do it themselves. If we say do this or that they mostly get pissed or cant get it to work. Men are all or nothing even when "all" needs time it will be done. I dont want to be sexist but in general men are for big tasks and women are for little tasks. So our nature is to not give a single f about something like garbage 😂
Hell no it’s not a weird quirk… I was able to take care of myself before you met me and now you feel the need to be bossy forget that garbage I’ll get it in the morning
Oh 100% if I'm on the way to do something then told to do that thing. That is now a tomorrow choir.
Her tone of voice says even more than what words are coming out of hwr mouth.
That’s his wife talking to him, and he’s giving her advice on how to respond to the ladies in her group that are saying this type of thing. They’re a really good couple.