The REAL Effects of Internet Addiction
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- Опубліковано 27 тра 2024
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▼ Timestamps ▼
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00:00 - Intro
00:08 - Discord post
02:01 - Overview
12:11 - What would you really be giving up if you gave up Twitch/UA-cam?
16:21 - I shouldn't have to quit
18:48 - Never have patience
22:45 - We take the internet with us
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I used to have an internet addiction but I had to stop because it was cutting into my video game addiction
Based
Based
Video games are garbage these days how did you choose that over the other? Well videogames require a bit more focus then youtube let alone tiktok, so kinda better choice.
@@balladin9200 What? Video games are awesome. I was just playing Breath of the Wild again in hype for the new Zelda.
@@balladin9200 it's not like indie games or old video games don't exist anymore
I spoke to a therapist some months ago about this kind of "distractibility" and told them that I was frustrated with the amount of time I spent on Reddit and UA-cam. Much to my surprise, they suggested to me to be careful about removing these "addictions" cold turkey because I might discover that these "addictions" are actually coping mechanisms to numb pain over various situations in my life. And my experience suggests that they were absolutely right.
Does your therapist using phone 📱 to? If he is not therapist he is also addict.
@@pushupsforlife8564 preaching much?
Oh yeah. An anecdote where that really hit me: At some point, I had uninstalled Twitter from my phone. It went well fore a few days until I got a message that caused a stressful reaction and I reinstalled it to distract myself and avoid the situation.
Whenever I've gone cold turkey I just sit around and do nothing. Because internet addiction has not been hindering my productiveness in general. It has only been a coping mechanism for things that are the main culprit for my procrastination.
Absolutely, Darth. If I didn't have the internet, I would just stare at the walls.
I actually love it when the internet goes off or there's a power outage.
Literally feels like a world of possibilities opens up of things to do OTHER than scroll UA-cam/Instagram. Boring things suddenly seem exciting.
Very interesting right, its almost like its not an issue when that new baseline has been created. I love leaving my phone in the car when I go skateboard
@@ijustlike0010 for me it's doing jiu jitsu. The only moments in my life when I only concentrate on one thing and don't get distracted by anything else.
I've noticed that the same effect can be achieved by completely avoiding any technology (apart from your alarm) from the start of your day. And as soon as you touch a computer or an entertaining phone app, you get instantly sucked in until you go for a long walk or do something else that contrasts with your normal context
power outage doesn:t even do much these day because 4g esixt :))
Yeah I have that same feeling as well. It's why I love getting rid of tech and go bare minimum. I.e a laptop which isn't very powerful. Grey mode screen on phone. Makes it less desirable to use.
Ultimately leaves for more time doing things which are more personally valuable and worthwhile.
I can’t believe Dr. K went through the trouble of creating an entire community across several social media platforms complete with fake comments and daily uploads just to convince me that he’s not specifically targeting me with these videos.
Actually, UA-cam is doing the targeting, not him.
@@Tully-Henderson They know, it was a joke.
LOL
@@KayKayBayForever The reply was also a joke. This is a therapist response to a someone with schizophrenia.
My exact thoughts
The internet turns off for 2 minutes and the everyone comes to the living room
I'm incapable of using any form of technology when there's other people to interact with, but whenever no one's around, I'm completely entangled by the internet...
I just find this odd about myself, and reading your comment made me think about it.
@@GirlLove4Ever maybe use the same curiosity you have about others and show that same curiosity to yourself in your alone time? Not sure if this makes sense
@@GirlLove4Ever when I’m alone I can be off the internet but when people are around I can’t put my phone down
@@sprocastersprocaster Does having company stress you out?
Yeah… to watch TV lol
The first step to healing from an addiction is to stop shaming yourself for being an addict. There are so many people out there with addictions even worse than yours, but I highly doubt you would go tell them they're stupid for being addicted. That's because addiction is an affliction. It isn't some kind of personal failing, it's a tough situation made from tough circumstances. Being hard on yourself for suffering is just like punching someone's bloody nose expecting it to stop bleeding. Don't beat yourself up.
thats a very useful comment, thank you
In come the anxieties/the overthinking, though. Like, I know that addiction is probably the result of tough life circumstances but are my circumstances really that tough? There are people worse off than me who seem to do fine without any addiction. How come I have to cope with my minor problems in such an unhealthy way while they deal with their much more real issues in such a sensible way? At least that's my train of thought when I try to tell myself not to be ashamed of myself for my addictions.
@@naan-oyobizniz3168 So this is actually a whole other topic and I recommend doing research into it. Although in my earlier comment I referenced "people have addictions worse than yours", I was more saying this to speak others' language since not a lot of people are aware that measuring problems and tough circumstances is fundamentally useless, and even impossible.
For example, let's say my super empathetic friends' pet died. And now let's say my sister died. You might think I have it worse, because a sister means more than a pet. But not only is that not always the case (some people have estranged families), I have a much easier time adapting to and dealing with death, whereas my friend does not (this is based on real life events in my life). Thus some people would argue that maybe I have it easier.
The truth is nobody has it any easier or harder, and even if people did, it wouldn't matter. Whether you're a mother in Africa attempting to provide for your starving family, or an upper middle-class US citizen who finds it hard to communicate with other people does not discount or discredit either scenario and the emotions we feel in them. In fact, it kind of has to not do that. The truth is most people in North America, even most parts of Europe, don't know anyone from Africa, and someone you don't know has no business holding you back from overcoming your troubles. Measuring or having to measure how hard certain circumstances can be isn't necessary because it's not like we have a tank full of tough-ness of problems and we have to save space in them.
There is no tank. The space is infinite. Take some.
Thank you for this comment 💗
Don’t give yourself a free pass for every shitty behavior.
There was a comment on Dr.ks other video on dopamine detox where a guy said he was giving it a shot. Its been a few months and he never commented on any other UA-cam video since. I think it's my turn to leave this addict life behind. I hope you all never hear from me because it means I made it. GL brothers and sisters.
Godspeed Narcissus
Good luck mate
Bro were you really stalking him 🙄I get your message but that's something you shouldn't do to a stranger on the internet.
Cheers dude. Rooting for you
@@flyorfloat Supportive stalking, it's more like spotting somebody while they exercise to make sure they're doing it well
The thing that makes this so hard is that we use the internet for useful things sometimes, and when that curiosity arises while you're using it responsibly, it's so hard to practice self control. I wish there was a way to stay off of the internet for good. To delete it with no ability to reinstall it on my phone whenever my self discipline is low.
I've realized that my internet addiction stems from a couple of personal issues for me: painshopping, porn addiction, not having enough socialization in real life, laziness, and avoiding unpleasant feelings that pop up when I don't have UA-cam playing.
There are so many things I want to do. When you asked: what if you did quit UA-cam and the internet for good? I immediately thought of how I could finally get better at the instrument I've procrastinated learning, gardening again, painting my toenails, reading the books I've neglected, having the house organized, having routines, being a better partner, overcoming the shame I have, taking my cat for walks, learning sign language like I'd been wanting to, having my normal sex drive come back, enjoying sunrises and tea again.
I don't know who I am anymore. My memory has gotten worse, it's hard for me to recall what things are called when I'm having a conversation. I never get out and do things with my family. I feel empty and enjoy very little. I have trouble even getting myself something to drink. I know for a fact my internet addiction has played a major role in this deterioration.
you put words to how i feel. I was just journaling about how I can’t remember names/words anymore
Probably nutritional deficienct in something
That's the thing. It's probably not smart to cut off internet completely cause most work,study,related things are on the net. But if there was a way to keep us accountable that would be bettte
@@oo--7714 how would one find this out/fix it?
I'm bit late to conversation, but there are programs what can keep you accountable, like timer programs used in computer clubs and programs used in university/school computers to whitelist/blacklist sites. They're aren't perfect, but you still can "outsource" a lot of discipline
"I shouldn't have to quit"
In other words, "I SHOULD be good enough to control myself and use this thing in moderation", but, "Maybe I'm not able to control myself, because the damn thing is addictive by nature, so there's no need to blame myself. Maybe I'm not "good enough" to practice moderation, and that's okay"
Right! I wish the ppl that intentionally created this thing to be addicting should be held accountable because in the early days us was just a useful tool as now it’s just evil…been infiltrated for profits but at our expense
I have a horrible internet addiction, sadly. It's not that much of a bulwark to me getting things done though. I went through uni, go to the gym regularly, have a career. It's just that I've used it as a surrogate for a social life since I was 15. Every time I try to break the habit, I end up utterly disappointed and go back to the internetverse to cope with my crappy reality
I have struggled to get outside of my house for the last 10 years. Basically since high school. I'm starting to learn that the uncomfortable parts of life are where all the good things are. Gotta get out in the world, put myself in uncomfortable situations, and be proud of enduring them instead of disappointed in the results.
You can even have a social life and enjoy awesome activities and still have internet addiction. Sometimes enjoying exciting videos is more exciting than actually having a conversation
Try martial arts. Worked for me.
@@Vincent-kl9jy 100% this. Become comfortable being uncomfortable, and all of the sudden it's not as bad any more. We adapt quite quickly. It's sadly the entry cost to a good life. Gotta go through it.
Why should we try?
I struggle so much with this because I know the power of the internet as a tool for learning. You literally have access to all of human knowledge at your fingertips, but there are so many distractions and pitfalls scatter throughout. So much time that could’ve been spent to become an expert on something instead of wasting it all on pointless entertainment
literally i struggle with this sm
The problem is the "scrolling apps" for me.
I don't think you're addicted to, say, Wikipedia.
And you still have the tool, I'm trying to remove specifically scrolling of my routine.
@@romansdump The problem for me is I not only have an internet addiction, but I also have a learning addiction and no social life to speak of, so I get absolutely absorbed into these seemingly endless internet rabbit holes for sometimes weeks, binge learning. To the point where I start forgetting to just "live" and enjoy real life.
I'm getting to the point where I'm seriously considering just getting rid of my computer and unplugging completely. I already ditched my smart phone. The idea of living an internet free life sounds kinda nice and refreshing.
I use it for learning but not exactly what I'm supposed to be learning.. I'll spend hours watching plumbing videos when in a week I have a software engineering exam, I should at least be watching videos about that, but no my brain doesn't work like that
@@romansdumpI have deleted all the scrolling apps, on UA-cam I blocked shorts. I still waste time regardless
Even if all my electronics were taken away, I doubt I would do what needed to be done, daydreaming is much too entertaining and addictive
Same, I would absolutely just sleep and daydream all day instead and eventually deal with my intrusive thoughs and cry and then be exhausted and sleep even more.
This is exactly what happens to me. I spent a day mostly without my phone and I just laid there thinking and daydreaming. If there’s books, I’ll just read my time away instead. Even when I am out in real life situations, I’m almost entirely in my head. I’ll use basically anything as escapism. I think I know what I’m trying to escape, but I’m not really sure where to go from here.
Sounds like it could potentially be maladaptive dreaming replacing the coming mechanism. Next step is to center oneself and try to anchor in the present more. It takes practice too.
@@cloud1668 My guess would be that you're single and childless.
@@sxmvp which would be good for you, you need to handle your emotion
I remember being so creative as a teen in the early 2000s, because I had so many fewer options for distraction. I’d carry notebooks with me and write when I was bored. Maybe listen to music and let my mind wander. I’d read, like, all the time. Even using my computer wasn’t much of an issue… the internet was kinda boring at the time. You had to really hunt for what you wanted to look at. Sure, I talked to people in forums and chats, but everything felt so much less instantaneous, urgent, and overwhelming.
If I hadn’t met my spouse through gaming, I’d say buying an Xbox in 2015 was a huge mistake. I wasn’t much of a gamer as a kid, because my mom tightly controlled TV and gaming time and wouldn’t let us play any game that required internet access. But hey, I wanted to finally finish playing through all the Halo games, so I bought an Xbox as an adult. Which led to me using Reddit all the time.
And now I game most nights of the week, when I used to write. Or scroll through Reddit, when I used to read. Or watch UA-cam, when I used to listen to music.
Your mom did the right thing.
I wouldn't say scrolling through reddit and watching youtube videos is a bad thing. Maybe cut down some of the gaming and youtube + reddit time but you probably just lost interest over time.
@@flyorfloat lol did you even watch the video
I was like this. Being an artist is honestly like cursing yourself to isolation. My Gacha Mobile Game addiction doesn't help.
My friends ALL said to me, catch me on Telegram, Insta, WhatsApp, Line, Discord. I ended up accept this internet addiction is now everyone's problem.
The way I can get out of the Pandemic and Internet Addiction is to pay a relaxed learning course and minimum buy healthy cafe food like soup and juices.
I should get out of my house first and get some air and grass. It doesn't stop me from using internet.
Why is that? Because when I quit internet, my friends called me a stalker for being a satellite conversation starter. On top of that, I quit using suppressant or sleepers (Diazepam/Valium) because it got me fired from a job accident.
Gym got my head busy, and the best saving grace exercise is not building muscles but flexing the joints to enhance bloodflow. In flu season, I bought 2 1kg Dumbbells and it saved me from myself.
Even today, I still play games. 7 of them in fact, but not all the time. Granblue Fantasy, Arknights, AL, Project Wingman, Vampire Survivors, Mahjongs, Chess, many more.
The difference is now I got fired, stretch every 20 minutes, set up automation for my games, bask in the sun, and opened my house doors for better air vents.
Job and work will follow a healthy body. Not the other way around.
I think part of it was the content. There simply wasn't so much and it was DESIGNED to grab and spit out your attention. We would browse for a while and then get bored and go do something else. Nowadays there is no such thing as "logging off".
So much of our lives revolve around the internet that if we wanna separate ourselves from it to avoid addiction, we risk losing all the possible insane rewards that come along with it
Just what are those insane rewards supposed to be? How likely are they in reality? Because it seeems like even most of the things that make life "easier" just make us dumber in the end, as we lose the ability to think deeply or even care about solving a problem. Or interact with humans face to face, even if it takes more time and effort. You gain instant convenience and gratification, but don't you lose your ability to function as an actual human?
@@tsurutom when I say rewards, I’m talking on a individual level, for specific people (social status, fame, money, success etc). For society, this is not necessarily a reward, and is harmful in a lot of ways like you’ve alluded to.
And how likely? Very low for most people
@@tsurutom if you arent born well off, the internet is pretty much your only avenue for networking into a better living condition. no one will socialize with people who dont have cars or money IRL
@@Dimitris_Balf for me. ive attained my dreamjob by coming across a forum back in the day randomly and learning from the people posting there. if i didnt happen upon that forum and thier wealth of knowledge, chances are that id never have made it to the position im in right now
To me, the “shouldn’t have to quit” is less moralistic and more a sign of (if I take it as a statement of my own) is that it’s an internalized reflected almost frustration or shame with myself. When I read that statement I take it as the app/technology/internet is a neutral thing that can be interacted with. The frustration and “should” comes with how I interact with it - I “should” be able to regulate my own behaviors in relation to it, so I “shouldn’t” have to give it up entirely when there fully are people who can and do interact in a healthier manner. While I see how/why it could be moralistic, putting the nexus of action outside of myself, maybe it’s my own internal ways of thinking things are typically on me that leads me to go “I shouldn’t have to give this up” as a judgement on myself as somewhat of a failure rather than as an external moral outrage. I do see how that can be meant/read that way, however. I wonder how much that makes a difference.
I was also thinking about that exactly
100% I agree. We feel we shouldn't have to give it up because we feel we "should" be better than this. It's a disappointment with ourselves. But the truth is that technology is designed to be addictive, so maybe it's not all our fault. Maybe some people are good enough to control themselves, but at this point in time, maybe we're not good enough yet, and that's okay.
Your interpretation is a classic manifestation of shame. Shame is when you put the emphasis on your identity, "I am bad" as opposed to the action "I did a bad thing". Shame is one of the worst emotions a person can feel. But talking about it and getting empathy is the way to overcome that.
Shame and unfairness are both moralistic, one against yourself, the other against the world. The non moralistic, practical answer is "well, that sucks, but that's how I can deal with it".
yup! all my friends can use tiktok and UA-cam a healthy amount. why can’t I?
one of the tough parts about internet addiction, and game addiction for that matter, is that we do actually lose a lot. There are things that do enrich our lives here. I wouldn't want to not have watched dbz abridged, or vaatividya's videos, i wouldn't want to not have found dr. k. Hell i chose to work in design and digital art because games were brilliant experiences. Imagine not enjoying the artful bliss of elden ring. Moderation is the end goal, but sometimes to reach moderation we do have to shoot for absense. And maybe find out what grieves and sadnesses that it was burying down and distracting us from
alternatively, if I replaced internet time with stuff like advancing my career, I would have a lot more money and a house and a family right now, which is clearly superior. or choosing to read classic literature over watching youtube videos, in a weeks time I would much rather have the experience of reading that book than watching a weeks worth of youtube videos.
I intentionally try to "purify" my recommendations by avoiding/disliking videos that don't seem useful to me, and as I go further I have less and less of this problem. I've danced around internet addiction and it's not a fun dance that's for sure.
I just wanted to add my way of solving it so that was my solution.
Liking/disliking doesen't really matter when youtube knows which video you're going to click anyway. It wiil quickly adapt to you by just analyzing what you're actually watching
@@FilinMXr I also use the "I'm not interested" button until UA-cam stops, so it's not all disliking and avoiding
I’ve done this too to cut out a shit ton of mindless/garbage content that I used to get in my feed (and inevitably end up watching). Now I get videos relating to philosophy/nutrition/spirituality etc which I consider a more nourishing alternative if I am going to fall down the rabbit hole - which I still do, but with less frequency.
@@kyleh6173 Yeah it helps a lot, i still mess up and watch things that aren't as productive as I'd like it to be but I don't get as addicted and my time is better spent.
WELL I DON'T THINK I'M ADDICTED TO UA-cam ANYMORE AS I FELT SO OVERWHELMED BY THE TIME I NEED TO GO TO WATCH 1 VIDEO :) UA-cam SHORTS FEEL LIKE A GARBAGE SO I DON'T EVEN TAP
To anyone out there who also struggles with isolation, a major breakthrough for me happened when I realized my inability to regulate screen time was mostly coming from fear of feeling alone rather than purely a fear of boredom. Personally, this realization alone decreased my cravings and increased my desire to unplug by about 90% overnight.
could you elaborate? thanks for the comment though
The problem for me though is that I have a lot to loose if I give up certain apps that I’m addicted to, especially UA-cam. My grades actually improved when I started incorporating UA-cam because I learn best through video since I’m dyslexic and reading words are hard for me to process. I’ve learned so many useful skills from the internet from programming the front end of websites, climate science, nutrition and biology, psychology, and art and design. Even workout exercises! It’s honestly something I need to balance by using cold turkey blockers and that’s helped. Limiting my internet usage to 2 hrs a day helps
I feel the same way!
To help balance things out I just use two monitors, so that UA-cam doesn't occupy my entire “field of vision” and thus all of my attention. This allows me to work, study or engage with other things that I would have to do at some point in time. Although, when reading certain things I do have to pause the video as the audio makes it difficult to concentrate.
I find myself being more productive using two screens as opposed to a single monitor (as I spend less time switching between windows and tabs etc); Although I am sure that you would get the same result using an ultra-wide monitor (by dividing the screen up).
Good luck with your studies, I hope that some of this information can prove useful or at least offer a different perspective on things.
"climate science"
By that you probably mean propaganda.
my goodness, you've described a lot of why i fear losing my UA-cam addiction
I know it's strangling my time and my ability to do the best in life, but it's because of UA-cam i'm so knowledgable about so many things, that without it I lose a ton of what makes me 'me'
but i know that's a childish thought, and at the end of the day it comes down to self control and understanding your own limits
Dr. K gave me a new perspective on this one. I gave myself the false impression that Internet addiction is inevitable and not a big deal because of how tangled and ingrained it has become with our lives. But that doesn't mean I can make excuses for choosing to stay connected when I don't need to; I can put that energy towards real experiences and hobbies instead of wasting it away
I love going to visit my grandma at her cabin in a remote part of Utah. There's no internet or cellular internet, traffic etc. It's so quiet at night that when it's cold and windy or a bit of snow, it's haunting. Like sound is in a vacuum. People don't realize how noisy and distracting everything is even in a quiet suburb, all your electronics and appliances... all make sound. For an "addict" of technology, it can be scary where theres even withdrawls and waves of anxiety. After a few days though... incredibly peaceful once you adjust to the fact you can't just pull your phone out or listen to your favorite music with the slightest bit of boredom. Im way more productive too and can actually manage to get heaps of housework and yardwork done. People don't realize that this tech steals a lot of time away from our relationships and productivity.
My issue with leaving is that my closest friends are all long distance, I love these people but I can't do that if I can't contact them. Also as a photographer, I need access to certain socials to get clients. It's extremely difficult lol
I have the long distance problem too, it really sucks.....
I don't think using the internet for those are issues though; like you should give yourself permission to use the internet for those things. Those are imo healthy ways to use technology.
But if you somehow get sidetracked and go off on tangents that's where it gets problematic.
@@resurgam_jsc 'allowing yourself to use it' slightly contradicts the limiting part which is designed to keep you away from it
it's a tacky situation cuz i completely understand where they're coming from
literally 2 days ago I said to myself 'you know I have an internet addiction' next two days I tried to stay off the internet but couldn't. Cought myself in the middle of watching youtube without even noticing how it started. This is like perfect for me!
the tikto/youtube shorts/instagram reels format is the worst thing to happen to the internet
It's SO EFFECTIVE... It's like they've been feeding us sugar all these years and then discovered crack 😖
This addiction is so bad. I got addicted to it because I was lonely and I cant do anything else other then be on the internet and the internet is the only social life I have.
I tried reading a book but I only could read a quater of it and now I cant even get back to it because its so boring and draining for me.
My addiction also caused me to have depression. I couldnt eat for days and I couldnt do anything. All i could think about was social media. My depression then caused me to isolate myself from my family and I was always in mh room laying on my bed just watching youtube for the whole day. I didnt go outside not even once to get a little bit of sunlight. My body got so weak to the point where I couldnt even stand up for a few minutes and my legs feel like their gonna fall off when ever I stand up. Thats how weak I got.
It also messed up my motivation and productivity. I couldnt do anything and im doing online school because I had health issues and sensory problems when I went to public school so my parents put me online. I did everything last minute but the good thing is that I was able to boost my grades with the help of my family. I can study but I need music and videos in the background to keep me motivated and be able to concentrate.
I was able to quit other social apps like tiktok. I was severely addicted to tiktok and I'd be on it day a night.
Im trying to take care of myself now. I started cooking for myself instead of relying on my parents, I tried working out every once in a while, I try to be with my family more, I improved my hygiene, Im also going to real life events so I can have a better and healthier social life and my productivity has improved quite a bit. But I just wish I wasnt this addicted to my phone I still feel like a failure because of my addiction but im getting there.
All books are initially boring! You could also find other, funner books. Books are great
I've probably been using UA-cam for a total of around 30,000+ hours total if I had to guess (19, by the way - been using it since I was 8). I've reached the point that when I think about the concept of quitting UA-cam entirely, I don't even feel any pain or horror or anything like Dr. K describes. I just feel something like hope and bliss for this imaginary world in which I'm not tied down to my addiction - but just like someone who has spent his life smoking crack, I just can't do it even *if* every part of me wants to. I'm so f'ed.
it's eerily disturbing how many times i've stared at my apps which have told me how many hours i've spent on YT in a day
it's quite soul crushing, and yeah i get what you mean (knowing that leaving it behind won't kill you, but at the same time you can't do it)
I'm in the same situation. I'm 17 and I've been using UA-cam for about that long as well. I'm setting a goal to only use UA-cam for educational purposes tomorrow. No clicking on videos for anything else.
Edit: it worked out. Today I used UA-cam a bit too much but not as long as usual. Yesterday I managed to not use it all day
@@ambienceandmusicstudios it's a tough ambition, but it's for the best
best of wishes for you brother
Unfortunately you can't see how addicted you are until you take a break from technology. For me, it helped to leave my charging (on a short cord) then literally lay on the ground away from my phone until I became motivated to start a task, for example, dishes, studying, grocery shopping, etc.
After doing this for a while, I tried applying the same concept to video games (like PC/Console). However, quitting gaming is way more difficult. I ended up using my phone as a crutch to quit gaming. Anytime I wanted to game, I would leave the room and hop on my phone. Then since I knew how to quit my phone, I would get off my phone after a few minutes.
Eventually, I regained control of choices. I still use a lot of tech but now I can make a conscious decision to take a break.
You know, I used to have the same problem for a while but one day it just ended. The life around me started changing, so there was no point in continuing to do so. I believe, main reason why it happened is cutting off all the toxic people and people who didn't bring up anything good in me. That magically created a place for new people, new opportunities, new life. One of the most meaningful advices that dr. K gave me is be patient with yourself, that really hitted me hard, I believe it's because of a video about why you watch dr. K and don't change. I think just the fact that there are people like me who watch this with no belief that they can actually change hitted something for me
I think what happens when the OP says they find themselves not being able to do something but instead preferring to watch videos, is his minds is telling him we havent allocated positively judged time towards our interests. We are dragging our feet when having to do a task because we feel like there wont be time to do what we want later so our mind tries to force us to stop what we are doing to do what we want.
The addiction is caused by fighting the impulse making it stronger. If we get the urge to watch youtube videos dont say I cant watch videos, say I can watch videos from X time to Y time. The mind is good at waiting not being told no. And then really follow through on that promise you make to yourself to watch videos during that time and dont feel guilty that you wasted time.
This has worked for me, I am curious if anyone else finds it helpful.
That’s how I got my gaming addiction under control. After many battles with it I understood what I got from it, decided to sometimes get that somewhere else and now let myself game but only if I genuinely enjoy it and only games that have an end.
Making compromise really is the most effective way to deal with your brain. A book once explained it like sitting in the copilot seat of the car with a cracked out clown driving. Ya can’t tel them what to do, but you can make deals to have fun together.
That's very good advice. The youtube phone app actually has options to help you with that, too. You can setup a reminder after x hours spent on the app. I personally use it but I admit I always ignore it..
I'm very bad with balance and creating a schedule I'm really stuck rn in life and it confusing
@@nineinchthread fucking same, it sucks but we'll find a way,
Yup, this worked for me. I think for most people they just need to have a healthy relationship with the internet. That means, like even in irl relationships, establishing boundaries. Don't let your internet use unconsciously run over you and take you to places that you have no control over - dictate when and how you use it. I find that a lot of people on here think that you have to completely quit the internet cold turkey (an all-or-nothing approach). If that works, that's great but for me it sometimes made me rebound like 10x harder. What works for me is somewhere in the middle: controlled use.
This may not work for others (such as maybe someone very addicted), but to me, my problem is a loss of agency over my actions. We don't realize how mindless the internet has made us so we need to somehow regain mindfulness of our actions. You have to be really adamant to take charge/control of the boundaries of WHEN and HOW you use the internet. It does take time and practice, experimentation, conscious effort and noticing when you've lost control of yourself.
I personally set aside pre-determined (not necessarily all time-scheduled) conditions to when I can use certain mediums. One way is to give myself permission to have a nice dessert or junk food every Monday and Friday, or play games after I finish my schoolwork at 8pm. I also CONSCIOUSLY tell myself: "I'm giving myself permission to eat this snack/use porn/play a game/use my phone/take a break/rest/etc." That way you won't feel like you starved yourself of something your brain likes doing while also establishing boundaries instead of reinforcing the autopilot. It trains you to approach the activity differently. Do you like to go on endless wiki binges? Give yourself a 2-3 hour timeframe in the evenings.
You will mess up here and there, which is normal as you ween off it and retrain your brain, but eventually you'll get to a point where you become more and more aware of being the owner of your time and resources.
tl;dr it takes practice but little by little establish boundaries to give yourself "permission" to do the things you love, rather than instead of doing them on autopilot or feeling like you have to quit outright
I've also went through and deleted a lot of subscriptions/people I follow/etc. to limit my feed to some bare essentials. But I think in order to do this you need to be in a mental place where you know what stuff really matters to you. Believe me, there are some things you just don't need to consume anymore.
This also might be more advanced but I would also recommend staying away from recommended feeds. Maybe after you've established some control you can start doing that. I still get caught up on the instagram feed (you can't hide it and it's well-designed to keep grabbing your attention, which is really shitty) but I only stick to subscribers and followers on other social media platforms. That way I've established control on what I get to see, rather than let algorithms dictate it.
I don't think this is a foolproof method to get rid of addiction because people experience addiction differently. If anything it's slow and steady way to get rid of something you've spent years doing. But maybe you can incorporate these things in your own journey.
I am profoundly grateful that the internet didn't really catch fire until I was in my 40s. It gave me time to set other patterns in my life before I tumbled down the well. I still spend way too much time online, but it would have been so much worse if I'd been able to do that from a young age. My life would have been much narrower in every way.
I am retired now, so I have the freedom to indulge my online interests. However, I recognize the danger, so I set myself a rule: I cannot sit down to game before afternoon, and usually late afternoon, at that. This ensures I fill at least some of every day with acts of responsibility and offline hobbies.
TV was sort of the internet dry-run of my youth, and again I benefited from spending some key years without access to English speaking TV. Consequently, I learned to enjoy other forms of entertainment. Essentially, life forced better habits and wider interests on me. If there's a way to create similar opportunities for yourself when you're young, take it. Your life will be the richer for it.
“what would it be like to never watch youtube again?” and my immediate thought process was, “i dont wanna think about it, i cant think about it, but i still need music, i still need tutorials, its ok once in a while”.. :(( yea.. i think i need to be more upfront about the fact that, i have a internet addiction. even saying i have a internet addiction i notice i hesitate with it, as if admitting and saying and typing “yea i have a addiction” is like.. bad? like if i dont say it, i can get away with it. arghh.
This was me a couple years back, my attention span was so short I can’t even finish a 10 min yt video without feeling bored and skipping through time stamp. What has helped me tremendously is doing it slowly and not quitting cold turkey. First I deleted social media apps that consists of shorter content ie tiktok, facebook, instagram, reddit. I only used my browser when there something important I want to check on my socmed. Spent most of my time on my phone watching youtube videos or netflix series and be intentional on what you are searching up. When I notice that I was glued to my phone for hours or get that itch of wanting to scroll immidietly drop the phone and go outside, cook a snack, do hobbies, do chores, hang out with dogs/family member etc.
Great advices.
Hard to separate urself from the internet, social media addiction is also a real thing , checking ur phone as the first thing at the morning and then u wake up and u're already exhaused
Hearing dr.K say that fighting the addiction felt like lowering the enjoyment level to 75% made me realize it wasn't that bad of a price to pay.
I'll try to reduce my time spent on UA-cam, I could really benefit from it.
My take on it is that we tend to do too much repetition of the things we enjoy to the point that the things we enjoy are no longer treats. They become obligations and addictions. “I shouldn’t have to quit” sounds like an obligation. I’ve done that with video games many times. For example, I thought Elden Ring was amazing for about 85 hours but then it started to feel like something I should be playing vs something I was actually enjoying. I would sit there and look at the icon on the screen almost dread pushing the start button, but I couldn’t stop myself from doing it for a long time. I played about another 15 hours. Then eventually I had the willpower to open the options menu for the game on the dashboard and hit delete. It asked me if I was sure, and I sat there and contemplated what I would mean to remove such a habit from my life. I finally confirmed my decision. When the icon disappeared, I actually felt relief. It was such a bizarre experience. Now I see that it was the right call. Good luck to any of you that are dealing with something similar.
This video came at the time I needed it. I've been aware of this addiction to the internet. Lately tiktok is the worst culprit and when get exhausted there, I mindlessly switch between and refresh all social media and I know I need to stop because other aspects of life are being neglected. My fitness level has taken a hit and that is affecting my confidence. I haven't been reading which is something I enjoy. I haven't gone hiking and been staying indoors and I feel lethargic.
The main problem with internet addiction is that internet is such a big part of our life, that we cant just cut it out. Because work, education and all that stuff is aslo in there...
We can relate the feeling of "shouldn't have to quit" this specific addiction back to the attention economy. People have created insanely sophisticated technology that has, thanks to said sophistication, made its way into every aspect of our lives. It pervades every aspect of modern existence. Yet increasingly, whether through their own will or simply through "unavoidable" monetization structures (yeah right), this technology is specifically designed to make you addicted, to misinform you, make you outraged, push fear and tribalism, I could go on.
The argument that this is "unfair" is pretty obvious to me on a systemic level, even if that's no immediate tool to help me get my own shit together. But *people* made all of this. They made something so potentially helpful, something that could do such an insane amount of good in the world, and decided instead to fuck my and your and everyone else's minds and often our whole lives because it makes a handful of bros more money they could ever spend. That is in fact unfair to every single on of us. And we *SHOULD NOT* be presented with this choice between being effectively excluded from society or using (and fighting against the manipulation of) this technology as I have described it. Might not be an 11th commandment, but if it's not somewhere implied in the existing 10, that only attests to how crap they are as a moral compass.
Totally makes sense!
7deadly sins: 7capital virtues:
pride Humility
greed Charity
wrath Patience
envy Kindness
lust Chastity
gluttony Temperance
Sloth Diligence
I barely can do anything at home due UA-cam addiction. Thank God it's manageable at work (as long as I have tasks to do. Any downtime and one earphone slides right in). 8hrs for sleep/getting ready for work, 8hrs work/adulting, 8hrs staring at the screen.
The most ridiculous part is that things I watch could easily be listening only. It's usually just one person talking, like Dr.K
Gluttony, sloth and greed 😶
couldn't have said it any better.
we should be able to, for example on youtube, avoid what's addictive (aka recommendations, infinite scroll potential) while keeping the tool (search engine, subscriptions, playlists, etc.)
Essentially it's forced drug use. Forced casino gambling, forced private taxes. All against the law.
Thank you for this, and how I can listen to this whilst I do chores. I realised that in order for my son to not use so much tech, I too have to give it up.
I feel like I let my internet addiction run its course to the point I'm actively looking to find things outside the internet. Started going to the gym and learning the piano. I also found cooking to be super fun considering you can make restaurant recipes for cheap. However, I did see a comment where the internet may act as a coping mechanism to numb pain and trauma and I recently learned I have PTSD from an event when I was 5 or 6.
According to some ADHD video channels, there can be predisposition to addiction.
It seems as though curated content websites ( such as UA-cam )
feel designed to exploit this tendency.
To me,
getting control through moderate use of the service seems superior,
yet, total rejection in order to go find something healthier to do in real life
seems easier, more enforceable.
My own point of view. 🙂
My struggle with the internet is that it's free. Getting into the hobby of reading costs money for every book you buy (and my library doesn't have many of the books I'd want to read, I've checked lol). Even playing video games is hard because I can't afford any new ones. Baking ingredients are expensive right now. Art supplies aren't cheap.
These are a lot of excuses but also a lot of truths for why I doom scroll reddit and binge youtube. I've been slowly getting into yoga youtube videos, and my workplace has a small professional development library I've been borrowing books from. It's just tough right now with the cost of living increasing. If I had the option to spend money for more fulfilling hobbies, I definitely think I would.
A notebook and a pencil costs much less than a month of broadband internet
I bought an e-reader recently, was well worth it. The one-purpose devices like that won't let you get sucked into UA-cam binges. I've been pirating since I got an Internet access, can't recommend it enough.
I think that is unfair to only think this topic in a individualistic way, because WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT TE COMPANY'S AND THE SISTEM THAT MAINTAIN THIS HAPPENING
Wow thank you for this video
It's suprisingly scary how when you asked "What would your life be without internet/social media?" (Not exactly how you phrased it) I just thought that life would not even be worth living
I've never realized how much I was attached to going on the internet/social media
I've met so many friends thanks to this and I've lived so many moments that made me happy that yes... It makes perfectly sense that I always want to go back
I love you so very much man ❤ stumbling over healthy gamer may yet prove to be one of the most important moments of my life. Thanks for finding us where we are doc
Being bored is good sometimes.
Your videos are so relatable man and after years of trying to quit I have high hopes for this time around with the newfound knowledge I have found in your videos.
@25:25 4 things:
Create barrier to access.
What does it do to you if you can’t have internet forever?
Learn healthy internet habits, uninstall first then stick to a schedule.
Get back into the real world, slowly but build it (back) up
This is one of the best videos I have ever seen in relation to this topic. Internet/Social media/Video game/P*rn addiction are only getting worse and we're desperately going to need to find a way to deal with this.
Good thing I used alot of drugs but quit because I'm sick now
I did a social media fast for an entire week and it was one of the most eye opening things I’ve ever done. It was so boring at the beginning but you end up filling in the boring moments with other things. I’ve never gotten so much work done in my life and actually felt completely caught up for once in my life. I also managed to save $800 a year just by canceling subscriptions to different things like UA-cam and SoundCloud. Cut out all media including socials, TV, movies, etc. for an entire week and see how it changes your life. 100% recommend.
I'm having trouble I'm so bad with scheduling and time management I can't even balance things it stress me out because if I'm doing a thing I feel like I won't have time for anything else and I compare myself to others also being I'm my situation is stressful so I get overwhelmed
I deleted almost all social yesterday and still kinda struggling
How did you fill your time without the media consumption and Internet?
@@nineinchthread Maybe one thing you could do to free up time is just make a list of all the things that you do everyday and try to cut out the unimportant things. It’s really weird at first to live without looking at socials everyday but it will get easier over time as you adapt. Good luck!
@@nKarje I would do things like going to the gym, walking my dog, playing pool at the local pool hall, playing chess with my dad, etc. There really is a lot of other things in this world that will open up to you when you make the time for them. The way I like to think about it is, what did people do before the internet was invented?
I can’t quit the internet entirely, but I can give myself 1 hour free from my smartphone/internet. It could be myself walking outside, being in the bathroom or doing housework.
Man I tell you what, I'm about 11 minutes in and I really resonate with what you just said. I remember when I was first learning to draw perspective and I had checked out a book from the library. My mom needed to do some research herself so we were staying there for a few hours, and my phone had absolutely NO signal. At first I was upset about it but then I figured I had my sketchbook with me anyways, may as well practice. I swear, that was the most efficient and streamlined studying session I've ever had. I don't know that I've ever been that efficient again in my life. This was in about 2017 so all the big apps were already prevalent and my addiction wasn't nearly as bad as it is now lol I wish I could do it again, but it's like trying to catch lightning in a bottle. I guess I should just take my supplies back to the library lol
I'm studying programming because it's what makes sense the most to me. I definitely see what you're mentioning here: my social skills are worse with the time, I'm studying at home (which of course, doesn't help), I've learned to use technology for practically everything I've ever needed in life, and as soon as I have time to "look around" and reflect, I realize how hard is it getting to be social, to go outside, to make/have/keep friends and it worries me. And yet, even if I grind as much as I think I can in order to get professionally desirable fast, it's never enough; and when my mood isn't great, I'm very vulnerable to distractions.
I feel this person when they said that they "shouldn't have to cut it", because my objects of addictions are my work tools, just used differently. So does this mean I'm doomed unless I change my career to something very far from technology?
I'm the same as you, studying programming. I am working fully remotely, and do everything via the internet, and I don't go out and socialize with people at all. I think that's something productive though, it's not internet addiction. I've been thinking how to be social? I am just watching UA-cam videos about that topic, how to win friends and influence people, how to read and understand people, what are the different parts of society good and bad. So using the internet to compensate my lack of social development by studying it as an academic subject.
I recently had my internet go out for a few days thinking I can finally get cleaning done only to pace through my house not knowing what to do, or knowing what to do but not wanting to do it. Not to mention the constant stimuli that I crave soo much even if I'm not focused on it. Makes me feel like i cant operate in a job environment that refuses to let me listen to music or podcasts while i work. Was the main reason I quit from amazon within 3 days. Got hired on asked if there was any way to get my earphones into my workspace, was told under no circumstances. In the next 30 minutes I broke down crying at my station, it takes a lot to push my emotions over the edge but that small thing does it all the time.
classic withdrawal push trough it
The tricky part with many things on the internet is that they are not exclusively entertainment that you could arguably just cut out of your life.
What if I'm checking the news a hundred times a day - just not read news again?
What if I'm using UA-cam to actually watch educational videos (like this one), but then get sidetracked watching other stuff? Never watch a video on UA-cam again?
What if I'm researching a specific issue and Google sends me to Reddit? Refuse to look at it?
What if I'm a software developer whose life revolves around tech? Should I switch to forestry?
Radical solutions like that just don't seem feasable. You may be able to quit drinking or video games. But realistically, you can't quit "the internet".
I agree with this, and I think Dr. K is also aware of this but he didn't divulge into it. I'd like to see what he has to say about it.
I'm sure the answer would be something along the lines of: is it necessary to constantly engage in educational activities in the first place? How much are the benefits compared to the costs? Personally, I'm willing to try and see how cutting out sites like Reddit for a good chunk of the day will affect me, but I'm hoping it'll help me prioritize said productive stuff during the periods when the sites are unblocked.
hard copium man, heres your answer:
The answer tot he first question is basically fear of missing out, so fix that. Your life isnt gonna become worse if oyu miss the news which are manipulated anyways.
Second question is also just cope you dont actually watch to educate you watch to entertain if you actually did watch these vids to educate this one alone would have been enough and oyu would have taken steps to quitting not just going to the next "educational" video
I dont understand a problem with that just get your answer and close google or reddit whatever, if it aut logins you and suggest some lucrative stuff just delete your reddit account. Also im sure reddit isnt the only place with the answer you were looking for.
I cant say much about the last one im guessing you are a coding type guy what i can say is develop a softwer to help you with your internet addiction :).
And yes you definetely can, im guessing you would have a stroke if i told you to quit your phone, which is entierly possible, i have done it. Physically discard of your phone, give it, sell it whatever.. buy a flip phone with only sms and calls and you are good. The problem i have run in to is then you just go to the next thing which for me is my pc and im gonna today literally just discard my wifi adapter so i cant have acces to the internet while on the pc. I cannot say what comes after but my guess is the TV. But yeah we, at least me, have been addicted since a young age, overall around 6 years of addiction so yeah no wonder its hard to break. Doesnt sound like the best solution, just to literally physically restrict yourself but its the only one that has been working so yeah wish you luck fellow internet zombie
Great information, thank you. I'll be thinking about this and sending it to my friends.
Thanks for this and everything else you’ve put out. You’ve really inspired me to pursue neuropsychology and hopefully give med school a shot in the future. Thanks for making information like this so available in the right place for the people who need it, I can only hope to have an impact on as many people as you do someday.
Paused for 30 minutes in the middle of this to journal. I needed it badly. Thank you Dr K
Your videos are always helpful and always makes you think. Am I addicted to watching Dr. K/HealthyGamerGG videos? Either way, very close to 1 million subs (12k away). Congratulations in advanced.
Thank you doctor K.
I have been really struggling with internet addiction as of recently.
Unfortunately. I can not quit my phone forever due to the how it plays a huge role in using it to communicate with my family.
But I've after finally watching a video about my problems... I have decided, if I can't quit, (which I have tried to quit, but always ended up reinstalling the application after a day or week.)
I will limit my usage time.
I really appreciate this video, thank you so much!
I must confess that I got myself addicted to the internet on purpose to get distracted from painful things happening in my life that I’m not able to deal with.
I find new ideas on UA-cam, that I most probably would't find otherwise or find much later and in distorted shape. Also most alternative ways include using internet, because there are genuinely no other way. And I remember times when I don't use internet. Information that I get then was much less versatile, and I had much less opportunities to check it or expand on the topic. I genuinely think that without internet life was worse for me.
Incredible speech Dr. K. Powerful and gritty 🙌 bravo
Having ADHD makes this all a million times worse. Luckily I don't use apps like tiktok or it'd be a shitshow.
I really needed this! Thank you.
How I knew my distractibility was not an internet addiction was my ability to cut it out and find new things to distract myself with. No UA-cam, no problem. Watch me pick up a new hobby (gardening, embroidery, knitting, ballet, etc), productively procrastinate, or find a way to help other people with their problems. Sure those activities might have more benefits than watching videos, but it was still being stressfully avoidant.
So I sought out an ADHD diagnosis, and the psych was sure in one session, but made me find childhood evidence for the official diagnosis (which was actually really hard but I found some). I got my brother to also go to someone since I saw similar problems, and apparently the stories my brother told were enough to make his psych say my ADHD was severe compared to him 😅
I often spend most of my day on youtube. I replay the same videos over and over because they are just distracting enough to make my inner monologue focused on them while I’m able to accomplish my tasks. This configuration helps me be more present than I ever was in my life. I don’t see a problem with it. Even though it might seem unhealthy, and I tried to fight it, now it feels like I only benefit from it and I should just embrace it. I don’t know though if it’s an ADHD thing or unresolved trauma and if I should care after all.
hi, guys! i have been chronically online for 6 years. no, seriously. i spend whole days watching youtube or twitch, to then feel ashamed for having wasted so much time instead of doing something else, and so on (endless cycle woohoo). i am a musician and a writer. i do not aspire to be the best musician or writer ever, but i do want to be the best i can. to the question "what would it be like if i never watched youtube again?" a part of myself lights on, fills up with happiness, etc.
i want to be the best version of myself, but i fear all these years i've spent "nowhere" (here) have already set me up to fail. i'll never be as good as i could've been if a year ago i had stopped... and then the cycle comes back, and i get sucked into endless thoughts, etc
my family has also been going through it. we've had a devastating loss to alzheimer's (a long one, for those who sadly know how this disease operates) not so long ago. we've all been a bit more mad and a bit more unstable since.
i want to quit youtube. i want to be a writer. i want to succeed at uni. i want to let life come to me, and dream the dreams that'll come, and bathe in the light, and leave this room empty of promises, take them with me, with me...
today i asked for advice to my uncle. advice regarding a "war" that i see unfolding between the members of my house. he said one of the most eye-opening things i've ever heard: i should not let others live my life.
i've had enough of others. i'm 22. i hope all is good in your guys' lives. in mine it hasn't been for a long time. but i can choose to see the world from a more positive perspective.
i am hopeful and no longer call myself hurtful things (for now) and feel no shame (again, for now).
let them come. i will wait patiently, not like a stone, but like a river.
EDIT: maybe i sound like a madman. the reason why is because maybe i am :/
Wishing you the best of luck on your journey. 🙏 I hope you write an amazing story or play a beautiful song.
The internet thought me so many things in life that I could not learn otherwise. In a way, it made me wiser, but the way I used it could maybe be done in a more responsible way I think. The internet saved me from further harm, but robbed me at times from focus, time and productivity in my work.
I have partucipated in a program in our school called "Immersion" by the Tulong Dunong organization; it's where we the students stay for 2 nights (friday-sunday) with families of less fortunate financial standing.
I loved it, and every moment of it. I ate grille eggplant, and it was refreshing. I got better at cleaning effectively in general. I had no access to the Internet, I got to indulge in more productive activities and ponder on thoughts that have given me insight afterwards. I didn't have to listen to my parents argue, and instead listen to my foster family talk about life and family with fhe neighbors in the afternoon.
After that stay, I gave them a huge box full of stuff; my fresh notebooks, my unused sketchpads, A LOT of my clothes, my hoodies and jackets, and my rubik's cubes.
I hope they're okay. They've made me okay, after all.
I swear to god, i had to replay like 5 minutes of this video because i couldnt concentrate on this awesome content, that Dr. K provided for us. I have a problem and im going to try to build healthy habits for my technology usage from now on. Thanks a lot, i really needed this! :)
What are you going to change?
Man this is so good, i def need all of this ...
Thank you, Dr. K. MashAllah, you are out here helping a lot of people.❤
I feel like there's more to the addiction, though. I am pretty badly addicted to UA-cam at this point, but it isn't all doomscrolling. There are some really good content creators that I follow, yes for entertainment, but also for music theory help, piano skills, and history stuff, and it's not like these creators upload anywhere else. I find the info so much more easily digestible when presented in a visual format. I have learned so much from UA-cam that it feels like inviting ignorance by quitting.
see Dr. K. that's why i like you... there are 10 thousand videos on youtube telling that moderation works (they copy pasted words of web in their videos) but you actually knows this shit and says openly that it is possible but NOT right now... right now killing it off is the only way. kudos. may god bless you ❤
A great video as usual thanks for the information
Beautiful piece. Jazakallahu khairan to both sami & jalal.
My problem is that since childhood I would easily get distracted with thoughts for hours. It's like I watch a long film, I can't be distracted for only 1-2 mins, even 15 mins. I also love drawing. And all those scenarios find their appearance on papers. I can't help it. And when I have this thought of drawing something I can't stop until I finish it. I mist have the result. And then the other scene must be drawn, then the other and it turns into a whole comic. And I don't picture a landscape, a space or some still life, it's always dynamic. It's always a scenario like a film or cartoon. There are characters, there's the setting, so I draw everything. Even the people in the background and their faces etc. I've always been scold for drawing. My parents would praise me when I drew real people, like portraits or something more realistic. But when I draw what's on my mind they say "why are you drawing these meaningless cartoons?", "Who are these people?" etc. I've been scolded for "wasting" my time on drawing. And I don't think I waste it. I love drawing. I love drawing things how I see them. I don't want just portraits, I'll draw the person being lost in forest or talking to the merchants in market, anything but not plain portraits. And we aren't rich, so my parents never considered to support any artsy career. So, I didn't even expect to get into an art college or anything like that. Now after having my master's for government grant(which parents forced me to go to, I shouldn't have given in) I have to work in the field or else I'll have to pay the fine. And I can't get myself to work properly. it's always torture, every hour spent at work is torture. And I have to bring the work to home too. I hate it. I can't sleep properly now. I wake up at least 5 times at night. And still I get distracted by drawing or the internet. I have a strange addiction to comment. When there's an interesting topic I feel the need to comment and when someone likes it I feel satisfaction. I guess that's the only way I feel validated.
The saddest thing about quitting social media a year ago is that I see that I don’t have a lot of friends or community. I do have friends, but we all have kids and are busy, so we get together once for dinner every other month. I feel like I need to socialize with adults 1-2 X a week. My husband is super social and he goes to an improve class and a board game group weekly. If I had someone to go out with or hang out with, I would. I find myself driving to target or the mall just to people watch. Occasionally I go to a tea shop and work on my computer, but they are only open until 7.
This video may have just changed my life. You made me realize I'm already living in the metaverse
Takeaways:
→ The price of distraction is soo low.
→ Notice the emotion behind stopping the addiction.
→ Learning healthy habits with technology, it might be moderation in the future but not in the moment.
→ Technology activates just enough of our brain without the benefits of achieving it in our real life.
to me the "shouldn't have to" idea is about the fact that i shouldnt have to suffer using technology that everyone else doesn't struggle with. and this "suffering" is both about using it while addicting, and giving it up.
Ya I felt that easy to compare yourself to others especially with those you look up to
This made me realize i need to redefine what fun means to me when it comes to spending my time because i really need to stop scrolling through facebook and watching youtube all day. The only thing i am fighting against is missing out on opportunities to learn about phsychology and the nervous system. I crave that knowledge as an autistic person. I am addicted to learning and seeking new information. That is my issue and if i dont learn i feel like i'm not achieving anything. This is something i need to work on because youtube and facebook arent the only places i can learn from. There are books too.
I consider "fun" stuff to be like waiting in an rpg or fast-travel: it's a time skip. I don't derive any more satisfaction from it. What I do derive satisfaction from is improving skills, making (non-existent and just imaginary) numbers go up - more muscles, more money, better fighting, more friends and social skills, more memories to turn into usable stories.
It's helped out immensely in many regards, but also made everything a good bit grayer.
And now, I don't want to be rude (tho I'll probably be), but what psychology are you learning on Facebook? And unless you're binging college courses, I doubt UA-cam helps in that regard either. It sounds to me more like a (self-) justification than anything else.
12:41 Hank and John Green
Not boring, thumbnail is always in the video
ProZD too
I was literally thinking about this today. I'm on vacation but I'm too scatterbrained to actually take a taxi to the ocean and rent a hotel there because the room I rent here is a mess. Every morning I wake up at noon, go down to the coffee shop by the lake, have a cup of coffee with a croissant or cake, read the news, watch Professor Kotkin lectures or whatever, then go for dinner at 5PM. Have some Cantonese charsiu or whatever, then go home on my Lazboy armchair too tired to do anything. Watch Dr. K, then around 9PM my friends message me to come to the bar to have whiskey and cocktails and I go until 4AM, and the next morning I wake up at noon again and need coffee. I haven't reinstalled Windows on my laptop, I haven't done anything this summer.
Why cant i enjoy youtube and be motivated to do stuff
Love this so much. The internet is so useful to our day to day that its so so easy to rationalize its use. What drew me to this video is that I am a successful server technician. I work from home with 10 hour days and often find it difficult to do anything but work (if I am not using the internet for personal reasons). That being said, in any downtime I have, I wholly filled it with UA-cam and reddit under the guise of productivity. That being said, I have been productive. Learned new IT, coding, and overall career skills. I have learned the guitar to an extent to where I am actually gigging in a very very short amount of time. When you said take away youtube, I felt genuine dread. I find myself filling my weekends with social interaction or even more youtube to further my crafts. I do not think my time was totally wasted on virtue of what I said above, but I certainly think I need to provide myself regular mental breaks. The internet is a great tool and place to learn, but I never found myself always wanting to spend all my time at the library in the past.
Three months ago I had a concussion and couldn’t look at screens for weeks. I felt like I was on cold turkey! Just like a drug addict! This is a serious problem.. 😓
Hope you healed up well, concussions can really really suck
@@ijustlike0010 It’s better but my eyes are still sensitive. 🥺
Dr K is psychic and uploads a video specifically on the mental struggles I am thinking/struggling with at any given time and I refuse to believe any other explanation
Dr K’s voice is so soothing then he role-plays “boring” academic style of video
13:00 that actually seems very chill, I think I'd love it
So, i am absolutely addicted to tech and efficiency
and one of the things i love the most about my relationship is that my girl is really active and likes to go do things and try new stuff and she almost never just stops and does nothing, while i am much more focused on efficiency and doing what i know works and relaxing by doing literaly nothing for hours, and we kinda push each other in the areas that matter, while she makes me go out more and motivates me to try new stuff that i wanna try but maybe wouldnt because its too much work, i help her with efficiency where it matters and relaxing and not caring about "time wasted" since you earned that time to waste with your efficiency.
and where i am kinda trying to get is that, in the end both of us have "addictions", i spend 70% of my day in front of a screen, MOST of what i do is related to a screen and technology... while she is addicted to "doing shit" and spends 70% of her day ultra active and doing everything she can find to do and then after a while she enters a state of burnout and exhaustion that isnt really healthy
both of us didnt really lose our addictions per say, but we do help each other keep them in check and by doing that they stopped being detrimental to our lifes
bruh you are not addicted, you are just hardworking
Look up definition of addiction
Summary for myself:
- The cost of being distracted has risen tremendously due to increased understanding and application of how to get more of our attention from the people behind social media.
- Giving up internet addiction can be difficult if we make it our identity or if we are unwilling to face the hardships of the process of doing so. "What would it mean to me if I uninstalled this application, video game, etc? What feelings would come up?" The feelings that come up are the sources of our addiction.
- Moralistic objections can be an obstacle: "I shouldn't have to give this up." Something that addiction will tell us is that moderation is possible. Sometimes the best thing to do is to uninstall.
- Access to the internet is with us 24/7. Tech reduces our patience with IRL stuff, which contributes to the development of internet addiction, which leads to the atrophy of our social skills.
- The internet is like the junk food of life; it fulfils our needs somewhat but not entirely. It activates just enough of our brain to outcompete real life, without the advantages from real life.
This good and FREE knowledge. At least with this, i always have a takeaway lesson/knowledge (after watching video) that can actually help me irl. TY Dr. K
I already uninstalled Reddit, Twitter, TikTok from my phone a long time ago and it really wasn't an issue for me.
What's problematic though is that the only thing I do in my free time is watching UA-cam videos. I had youtube uninstalled too, but got way too bored and decided to reinstall it. Living in the middle of nowhere, there aren't many great alternative activities. I've been hiking (which is surprisingly very enjoyable) a lot lately, but it's not something I can physically do as long as I would normally watch UA-cam.
Any ideas?
From what I gather it's better to do nothing, than indulge in instant gratification. You'll get bored, and naturally start to think of things to do.
Allow your mind to have random thoughts, which aren't against the backdrop of a screen and muffled. When you're constantly looking at a screen, you're mostly thinking about the content rather than random things in your life, or random thoughts.
Maybe instead of quiting UA-cam completely, don't use it for the first 3 hours of your day. If you can manage that, then increase the number of hours. Progressive overload, just like the gym.
Spend some time reading, cleaning, cooking, organising stuff better in your house, go for a walk etc. There's a subreddit called no surf which has a post about alternative things to do which don't involve the Internet.
I have the same problem as you. This is hard to implement. I need to take my own advise.
I recently went through the same thing. I just started learning, like anything. Reading the Dictionary, Ancient History, Math, and music. It's so satisfying learning things yourself instead of watching a video and retaining none of it
Some ideas:
1. Gardening. If you have access to land, you can grow yourself some fruit and vegetables and the effort need not be that high. It's a hobby that demands patience and mindfulness too, so it cultivates the opposite of the qualities internet addiction does. It's not easy, so there is a lot to learn for a long time (good for a hobby) and you can start with growing stuff in containers or committing to mere 10-20 square feet at first.
2. You could branch out further into fitness. You could start lifting weights, calisthenics or do kettlebell stuff. Yoga isn't bad either. Spending like an hour on this stuff a day is pretty easy once you get into it.
3. You could learn about the local fauna, flora and learn about hunting, fishing, foraging or herbalism. Plant and mushroom identification has a high skill cap and should keep you occupied for a long time. Could go well with hiking too.
I've uninstalled facebook and deactivated my account and logged out my Instagram but I still need UA-cam because I still wanna watch and listen to you Dr K 🤣
Thanks for the perspective Dr K
I love flying on planes because I lose basically every function on my phone. A 3hr movie I found boring before became enthralling without the possibility of me even grabbing my phone
I am very surprised to feel nothing about losing UA-cam forever.
This is good news ! I hadn't realised I wasn't addicted anymore until now.
I have been replacing my internet addiction by a chosen addiction to one video game for a year now, and it actually worked.
I chose Genshin Impact : beautiful sceneries, fantastic music and nice interactions all around. Also, it is an active distraction and not a passive distraction like scrolling. It helped me cope with everyday life.
Being addicted to one game is OK, as it is a real leisure activity. It is not the same as loosing a whole day mindlessly scrolling or watching hundreds of useless **** on UA-cam.
I think I can now try to go without UA-cam for the whole month of July. I rarely log in on Twitter, but I can limit it to 15 minutes whenever I choose to use it. I used to be addicted to that thing and spend days and nights on it.
Thanks for the good news, Dr. K. The future looks brighter than it has ever been ! =)
healthiest use of Genshin i've ever seen lol
but i definitely think putting all of your bad effects of the bad habit and trying to replace it with one singular one is a good method of learning to improve your own focus, whilst simultaneously retaining the joys of the previous one
the book "digital minimalism" by cal newport really changed my perspective about modern technology and its role in our lives. a good read!!!
also the whole amish thing isnt super anti technology, they still use a bit but only when truly necessary or it has shown to have a greater benefit than cost to quality of life
I actually de-stressed significantly when you spoke in yr "monotone boring" voice. Loved it! Really tired of all content creators using hyped up, excitable, superfast speech. I often have to quit watching creators that I love only halfway through a video because of this even though I wanna hear the content. Basically, I get what you were trying to say you feel you have to do to keep yr listeners interested, but yr impression of "boring" was actually the complete opposite for me. I don't mean this as critique, I just don't think yr capable of sounding boring even when you try. Thank you for an amazing channel and great insights from a brilliant mind!