I was involved with a co-worker who was having an emotional affair with me - I thought it was going to get physical as she came over once. She told me her ex was a narcissist and after that visit, she started playing games, gaslighting, being very hot and cold, etc. - nothing sexual happened when she came over but we did hug and I got a little handsy with no issue from here. I thought we had some real chemistry and although she was (and still is) in a relationship, I thought she may be in a bad relationship and looking to leave... I was obviously wrong lol
They play the victim bully a lot. One moment, to manipulate to get what they want, they're the victim. When they don't get their way, they become the bully.
Very true, I would only hear two words the narcs/their flying monkeys will say which is nothing positive. Just the word ugly lol. If they are calling people ugly, they feel ugly themselves. If they say you are trash, they feel trash. If they tell you to shut up when you didn't say much, they can't shut up from their own self loathing.
Arguing with a covert narcissist is like trying to negotiate with a toddler who thinks they’re entitled to all the candy-you can present facts, but they’ll just demand more and act like they’re the victim when you say no.
I fell in the trap myself for nearly a year. Never knew someone could be this pathetic of a low life. Narcissists?? What's that?? I KNOW NOW. GOODBYE MEAGAN. Karma is a real btch.
I didn't know what narcissism was until I was 42. My dad is one so I thought this was just normal...since it was all I'd ever known. I found out when I got into theraphy because my romantic relationships kept failing, I was overwhelmed by and rejecting actual love from people who were emotionally/psychologically healthy. It felt fake to me because all my life I had to work for and earn love by being perfect and over-giving. The aha moment came when my then partner told me he didn't feel connected to me. I truly did not know people were supposed to feel connected to each other. It was a confusing and devastating moment for me. But it was the greatest gift zi ever received because it got me on the path to recovery from the lifelong emotional abuse.
right! that's because they are mentally ill. they say things that normal people wouldnt say. my ex once sat infront of his mother , telling her how he owns me and i belong to him. this is all while abusing me , belitting me, and taking money from me while demanding I marry him and give him kids even though he knew i didnt want to have kids and I didnt want to marry him .
Excellent and stick to the plan. Remember, anytime and every time you contact your narc. Inside he is laughing at you thinking how pathetic you are and you are nothing without him. Honestly, that's how they interpret information. They have self-loathing and deep down know they are nothing. And when you chase him, you make him feel like he's a somebody, and at the same time, they think you are beneath them because you're chasing a fake loser. And they think if I'm a loser, and she wants me, then she's a bigger loser. They don't perceive information like a normal human being. All the best 👍 ⭐️💯
@@asadzeethree2726thank you. I never reach out to him. He calls and texts to make himself feel better. But then he doesn’t want to hear how I feel. He’s starts yelling and talking over me. He cheated and got caught. He is now trying to spin it all. I don’t have time for that ❤
Don't judge every man by him, with that birthday. Protect your heart. Yesterday was my birthday, and I'm actually an empath, not a narcissist. Just letting you know, as you can tell from my profile picture, I'm not a single man flirting.
1. Holes in stories. 2. Lack of empathy. No growth or depth of connection. 3. Need for admiration/ validation/attention, energy vampires. 4. Manipulative behaviors. Projecting, guilt tripping, controlling your perceptions. 5. Exploitative. Weaponise your vulnerabilities. 6. Entitlement. Justifying & rationalising to get you to conform. 7. Rage, volatility and aggression. Out of proportion emotionality. Lack of self regulation. Tips: Trust your instincts. Set boundaries. Seek support.
Yep. I could tell which women he’d been with based on his energy, choice of words, confidence and ego inflation or deflation. He never understood how I knew his lies so well. If you be quiet, look and listen it doesn’t take long for them to tell on themselves. They slip up alot
Yeah, their arrogance, entitlement, everything about them, it's their attitude that gives it away for me, apart from the initial love bomb stage, they soon show their hand. Their hope is that your blinded by their actions at first, but a clear head can see them for what they really are. It's experience that taught me to spot them out myself though.
My ex narc was a master of disguise, a liar until one day I realised that she is lying. Then I confronted her with all the evidence in front of her orthodox family. She had nothing to say. Then after that bye bye. Well I am a Scorpio myself, can't let anybody just destroy my life.
Oh my, you really nailed it when you brought up having a support system to help to get out! All I had were more narcs (large family & all narcs. yup, I'm the scapegoat) So, 65 yrs later I'm finally getting away from them all! Thanks to new support system. Way back, we just didn't have the information about narcs that we do now & I was groomed by many since birth. But my freedom is at hand! Praise God, He does answer prayers!! So keep your chin up & keep praying, there absolutely is hope. Sending love, light, peace & blessings to all.
Rage: Having a great day & you're out having a nice drink and talking and laughing and, suddenly, they take offence out of the blue at something completely innocuous...raging at you in public and you're Completely blind sided... Then they say 'It's on YOU to get this back on track and they sit there whilst you try to collect yourself after the rage , whilst trying to be 'normal'. 'Stop making small talk.. it only makes it worse!' Being blamed for the whole thing whilst they sit in victimhood and watch you squirm, trying to get everything normal again. All i wanted to do is run
Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
My female narcassist was a nightmare sleeping, she would toss and turn kick the quilt off Eventually I'd have to sleep in another room I reckon it was a guilty complex, This was one of her strangest manorisms, She also would say something quite nasty about someone and then hide what she had said straight after.
My sister has been stuck in an endless loop with a narcissist for 18 years. I would like you to do a video on the impact on their loved ones.......its torture for us as well.
Your sister has "narcissistic fleas" they begin to show the characteristics of the abusers. They have had a vampire suck out all their great qualities and they become unable to maintain relationships and begin to lack empathy for their children, family, friends and co-workers. They are in an addiction they ate blinded by this and sometimes you must protect your own energy. You can love your sister, point her to help, but do not get sucked into her chaos. You can atch their demons. Empathy perverted is covert narcissism. You will sacrifice everything for the narc, you have "idolized" the relationship. You have become them. I just watched this happen with my best friend THE GOAT OF EMPATHY, TURNS OUT SHE IS JUST A COVERT NARC.
They spend so much energy on being something they're not they always tell on themselves you just got to listen that's it man they totally tell on themselves
❤❤ I'm in a 18-year marriage at 10 years same thing he's doing right now at 18 years they don't change they always reveal themselves you just got to look I'm sorry I hope you can get stronger and you can just wake up and just do it one day it's hard but we can make it there's so many of us that have been trapped with a narcissistic person and learning how to live without them it is really healthy and happy and God bless your heart move forward everyday
Because it's part of their plan,to push and pull to get what they want ,it's a primitive form of extracting what they can from you whilst doing it for them,their cute bur not clever.
Long story short, because there is no you in their sights! It's all about them. You were just a fan to them of their grandiose fantasy. And you started misbehaving by starting to question their BS, so they thought okay it's time to replace you with another device that will take your original place when you first started off with them!
And she said that she would hurt men because she felt empty and she was trying to feel something by having sex with a lot of different men just fucking nasty woman
You are the best. the way you break down the different steps they go through.. I just broke up with a narcissist that i was with for 18 months and she showed all the signs but i was love bombed so bad i was blinded to the fact that i could not see what was going on Listen up people if it sounds too good to be true then it probably is not real.....
WE went too a councellor first words that came out from him was "its her she had a bad childhood she's disturbed" when asked about his childhood he replied one word "perfect" we didn't go again non starter.
So true about emotional deregulation when they go into aggression and rage. He lost control of the narrative and of me and it came out ……I was no longer letting him manipulate me. This is when I knew something was seriously wrong with him.
Definitely not just you! My ex narc reacted the same way. Anything that makes them loose power or sole friendship will trigger them... Expect fireworks!
Good to know that I still have my senses working. She always tried to make me feel exaggerated or insane. But she put so much drama in for things I wouldn't even say much about. Master of gaslights they are too!!
"There is no growth to the relationship" - OMFG THIS! I had been in an abusive relationship so long that I had forgotten my previous self. As that self has started surfacing it always seems to be at odds with my ex specifically in relation to growth of the relationship. 10 years of therapy I spent protecting her because I thought I was the problem yet I was always the one making the sacrifices. 3 more years of trying to get her to join a session lead to the end of our relationship as it exposed her desire to keep the relationship stagnant. "How are you supposed to love me if you hate yourself" 😅 I don't suggest saying such words till you are ready to go no contact.
Her asking me how do people have time to cheat. She answered her own question but was trying to get a negative reaction out of me. These people are EVIL 😈
What I love about accounts like yours is that your offering this information for free and you are helping so many women who wouldn’t find a counsellor like you in a million years that understands narcissistic abuse! Thank you ❤
Same exact thing with me. She played victim and called me a narcissist... that's how I learned the term and with more research I saw that it was everything she was doing.
They’re frustrating as f* 😅! The little taste I got from one such narc was intense and bad enough. But it taught me a hell lot about my own relationship patterns and trauma bond. And I also became aware of how many people are stuck in such relationships.
My ex told me he was a cook at a nice restaurant when in reality he was the dishwasher. I was young then and didn’t see all the red flags unfortunately. He’s a massive malignant narcissist.
Wow I'm in the battle now I'm told you are mental. It's all so bad. I'm learning and I won't submit I'm working on escape. Separation is coming. I'm Told it's 100 percent my fault you hold the key to it all. I've felt humility twice on 10 days I was promised I see what I'm doing now I went back the tension is worse than ever. I'm a trigger I'm told well the trigger has left. Please pray for me my grown children don't want any part of this twisted abyss. 😭😭
My gosh, you really know your stuff. I think you are wonderful and so insightful. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for teaching me about who my ex husband is. ❤
True! If one listens! Introspection regarding self & narc! Equates 2 discernment! Fam, friends, flying monkeys don’t listen! Rather believe the lies, which states facts about them! Peace & Blessings!❤
I think because they just want to brag to someone about what they’re doing. I look back at the things he’s said over the past 40 years and several times he told me what he was doing, but then the subject gets changed and forgotten it’s hard to explain.
Thanks for your dilligent work and videos. I am healing from a short relationship with a guy … We were arguing every, every week - from Thursday/Friday til Saturday morning or Friday evening, had nice Sunday afternoon and Sunday. And when I was already feeling happy and revealed that we made it through on Monday and Tuesday, the cycles were coming back … Intense story short: thank you for your videos, as a part of my healing journey I am turning on the videos in the moments when I start to think or overthink or some painful memory comes out again, and with all my support I get and your videos, I am really seeing better days to come. It feels really good that I went througtt that relationship, ended it, took my lesson and now releasing it completly. With patience, self-love and feeling of self-confidence and positive for the next and hopefully the real longterm relationship. ❤
My ex narc girlfriend once let slip in conversation that she didnt see anything wrong in cheating on your partner and paying prostitutes for sex. Mind you she is religious and goes to church every Sunday.
My female ex narc told me it was only considered cheating when penis inserts into vagina. All other acts are 2 consensual adults having fun and considered harmless. So, I asked her how she would feel about me getting a BJ from another woman since it's NOT considered cheating. She didn't like that because it only applies to them when they are messing around. The amount BS these narcs come up with is just insane.
@@clintonnagy1662the audacity of their double standards. It's incredible what we put up with. The push and pull just to be beat on and cheated on and eventually discarded and then devalued to the social media world like we meant nothing and they were the victim of US?! The audacity. I since have got off social media. It breed narcissistic people from head to toe. Now she's with her new soulmate and I've heard he's everything she's been missing.... I mean I caught her cheating on me with him but yeah I mean that's their game and now within a matter of months she's moving to another state with him and they barely know eachother. We KNOW what happens when that masks slips. Watch out the clock has been ticking for the new supply we once were. It's crazy one day they love us the next day they are a ghost but still talking bad about you all while saying how happy they are on Fakebook.
@@clintonnagy1662 Yea exactly. My ex narc girlfriend was very jealous of other women but didn't seem to have any issue of her having fun. They are totally hypocritical. Mind you she never admitted to cheating and in fact always preached about the sin of fornication but they will tell on themselves in conversation if you listen carefully. Eventually found out that she was cheating with 2 guys including her ex husband. I'm sure her body count was much higher than that.
Easiest way to get them to tell on themselves is to confront them with their abuse and see their reaction. If they at least own the fact that they hurt you - regardless of intent, they're not a narcissist.
The creepiest thing out of Allllll of this, with him, was the SHEER and UTTER detachment he had for his mother when she died. “Yeah, I miss her, but it’s all over now.” Wtf???? Scared the Hell outta me.
mine admitted to love bombing me. This sent me down a rabbit whole of attachment styles and narcissism. I'm not a phycologist, there are days I believe my x-partner is a covert narcissist, others I thing a fearful avoidant. In the end, it doesn't matter. I tried my best. I am free and I will be the best parent I can be to my kids, and inform my students (designers) about narcissism because most of us are highly empathetic people due to our chosen profession having to design for many other people. I'll also encourage them to take psychology classes with their electives. Some days these video's really help, others I feel like I am beating my self up. As I said it doesn't matter, it's done I've moved on. I'll be more vigilant in the future.
Mine couldn't cry or show emotion when making their "false" claims of being the victim, when they were lying about what some one supposedly did to them, but when some would call them out and leave, they would break down.
I've seen people claiming they're neurodivergent to justify their narcicism. And i somehow agree, these people are unable to learn and grow with all the implications this might cause in the individual that "lives with narcisim". I dont agree with identifying with "neurodivergent", only a narcisit would find meaning in that.
The narcissist in dealing with has selective lack of empathy. It makes me think she was abused by someone close to her who should have been her protector. Or she perceives that someone abused her. It's complicated to grow up in a uninformed environment.
I used to think that he accused me of stuff he did because he felt if he could betray or hurt me while "loving me so much"(as he claimed) that he was only worried I was capable of doing that to him no matter much I loved him. Idk if that makes sense. However I learned the hard way thru all these years, that he is incapable of true unconditional love and every single accusation was in fact, admission of what he was doing and nothing more. 💔
Last night I had a conversation with my now ex-husband, his excuse for why our marriage failed was because he is in Mexico as a personal trainer stating he's working to make ends meet and didn't have time. A whole year I waited for him to get his s*** together and nothing only a couple words every couple months, no explanations no effort and yet he is pissed off that we are now divorced. I took care of him and his family for a whole year in the beginning of our marriage while he was sick when he got better he said it was his turn to take care of me and that's basically when he disappeared. I told him last night there is no excuse especially working as a personal trainer as to why you are too busy to have a marriage with your own wife, he acts like he's a brain surgeon. I told him you don't do people like that when they have been there for you in your worst of times and if you're only excuses you had to work then yes I'm happy the divorce happened
Yeah they do...damn...just didnt pick up on it at the time...they love to talk...i realise now i just had to listen... @ask Anoushka im catching up with your vids wish i had found your channel alot earlier.. you explain everything very clear your so different from anyone else on youtube a unique structure that i have not heard before so thank you...had to add yes energy sapping i lost 2st in weight stressing was 11st gained some back but yh damn...and now she just msg saying she will always love me after 20msg of abuse...
On rare occasions I explode, it happened recently (unfortunately) I am quite easy going usually and this leads others to disrespect me at times. If the disrespect continues I can erupt, especially if I've been suppressing myself from speaking up. It can be very damaging but it causes a change in their previously unchangeable behavior. I wish I was better at maintaining my boundaries without that 😕 I am an Aries..and I don't "think" I'm a narcissist"..but I could be wrong? I certainly have empathy and I don't make up stories!
I was told I did something to make some women at work mad. I dont know what or who said it. But, I have a feeling a narcissist did it to play the victim and get some control or set me up. Should I call HR to protect myself? The managers are giving me some awkward looks.
I went through this at work too. Yes I say call HR, but only to get it on record. Dont expect to get support. They already covered HR too. Its more likely you will have to leave, but the more people that call HR over time may eventually help one of their targets.
They do ❤❤❤❤❤❤ He said one afternoon: nobody. Can fake a laughter better then I do In his sick mind he is the only one in the world . Now he knows he is a narc Devilish inside
Your first statement is that the narcissists situation is medical and then you state that they choose their behavior. It can’t be both. At the end of the day, you and I know that they know what they know what they’re doing.
It's been 8 days i haven't eaten anything because they left me after causing so much havoc and damage to my life and relationships with friends. I feel so empty
@ultravioletcanary go for a walk in the woods and listen to the happy birds. Look at the autumnal trees. The yellow and orange trees will cheer you up. Then eat your favorite food later or some ice cream. There is some new guy waiting on you to get better and come into his life. So, get busy. You will heal, and I bet you are pretty and will be happy with him. Just stay busy as you heal. Good luck.
Remember 1 thing, The narc deep inside feels horrible , its all a show for the outside. Narcs has alot of voices in their head telling them all day long how pathetic unlovable low life creatures they are.
Please try to eat, please you have to try, you have to do this! Don't let them defeat you. The end game of most narcissists is to unalive you, please don't let this happen to you ,don't be a victim.. Just get rid of them and move on, there's very little hope for them to ever change. As a self aware, diagnosed narcissist, I'm telling you these are facts.
1:50 “Incurable.” Science never forecloses the possibility of further understanding and breakthroughs. We are only beginning to understand Cluster B disorders and much progress has already been made. Having had to interact with four NPD individuals, I understand the temptation to demonize and engage in splitting/black and white thinking. Given that 20% of the military suffer from NPD this is more than an interpersonal exhortation but is political as well.
One thing I noticed, in all their stories they are either a victor or a victim, never a villain. The truth is they are always a villain.
They play life like poker,bluffing into what they have,and hope you will keep investing in them,that they will have 5he chance to bankrupt you.
I was involved with a co-worker who was having an emotional affair with me - I thought it was going to get physical as she came over once.
She told me her ex was a narcissist and after that visit, she started playing games, gaslighting, being very hot and cold, etc. - nothing sexual happened when she came over but we did hug and I got a little handsy with no issue from here. I thought we had some real chemistry and although she was (and still is) in a relationship, I thought she may be in a bad relationship and looking to leave... I was obviously wrong lol
They play the victim bully a lot. One moment, to manipulate to get what they want, they're the victim. When they don't get their way, they become the bully.
Just completely stay away from them forever and their flying monkeys or enablers, this is the only thing you can do my friend.. for your mental peace.
Yea, they always seem to cant remember what happened exactly, when they were the villain. Smh
narcissist's accusations are confessions. They project on you their own sickly behaviour which proves that they know exactly what they are doing.
Exactly.
Agree
Or what they are thinking about doing…
So true!!!
Very true, I would only hear two words the narcs/their flying monkeys will say which is nothing positive. Just the word ugly lol. If they are calling people ugly, they feel ugly themselves. If they say you are trash, they feel trash. If they tell you to shut up when you didn't say much, they can't shut up from their own self loathing.
Arguing with a covert narcissist is like trying to negotiate with a toddler who thinks they’re entitled to all the candy-you can present facts, but they’ll just demand more and act like they’re the victim when you say no.
I weep for my former self that had no idea what narcissist were, im no longer blind to the game 🎉
Agree 1000%
Growth is good. It's ok.
I fell in the trap myself for nearly a year.
Never knew someone could be this pathetic of a low life. Narcissists??
What's that??
I KNOW NOW.
GOODBYE MEAGAN. Karma is a real btch.
I didn't know what narcissism was until I was 42. My dad is one so I thought this was just normal...since it was all I'd ever known. I found out when I got into theraphy because my romantic relationships kept failing, I was overwhelmed by and rejecting actual love from people who were emotionally/psychologically healthy. It felt fake to me because all my life I had to work for and earn love by being perfect and over-giving.
The aha moment came when my then partner told me he didn't feel connected to me. I truly did not know people were supposed to feel connected to each other. It was a confusing and devastating moment for me. But it was the greatest gift zi ever received because it got me on the path to recovery from the lifelong emotional abuse.
They need to teach narcissism 101 in high school as a mandatory workshop at least
They say things that no one else would say outloud,they have no integrity.
right! that's because they are mentally ill. they say things that normal people wouldnt say. my ex once sat infront of his mother , telling her how he owns me and i belong to him. this is all while abusing me , belitting me, and taking money from me while demanding I marry him and give him kids even though he knew i didnt want to have kids and I didnt want to marry him .
Nor much real dignity or self respect
Because they know best always. Who are we to question them.
No filters
100% my experience. Over time, they tell you who they are and what they do.
Proud of myself! It was his birthday yesterday, and I did not contact him. It’s a small step, but huge for me.
You did the best thing by not contacting him! Good on you !!! 🙏🏻
Excellent and stick to the plan. Remember, anytime and every time you contact your narc. Inside he is laughing at you thinking how pathetic you are and you are nothing without him. Honestly, that's how they interpret information. They have self-loathing and deep down know they are nothing. And when you chase him, you make him feel like he's a somebody, and at the same time, they think you are beneath them because you're chasing a fake loser. And they think if I'm a loser, and she wants me, then she's a bigger loser. They don't perceive information like a normal human being. All the best 👍 ⭐️💯
@@anoushkamarcinthank you ❤
@@asadzeethree2726thank you. I never reach out to him. He calls and texts to make himself feel better. But then he doesn’t want to hear how I feel. He’s starts yelling and talking over me. He cheated and got caught. He is now trying to spin it all. I don’t have time for that ❤
Don't judge every man by him, with that birthday. Protect your heart. Yesterday was my birthday, and I'm actually an empath, not a narcissist. Just letting you know, as you can tell from my profile picture, I'm not a single man flirting.
1. Holes in stories.
2. Lack of empathy. No growth or depth of connection.
3. Need for admiration/ validation/attention, energy vampires.
4. Manipulative behaviors. Projecting, guilt tripping, controlling your perceptions.
5. Exploitative. Weaponise your vulnerabilities.
6. Entitlement. Justifying & rationalising to get you to conform.
7. Rage, volatility and aggression. Out of proportion emotionality. Lack of self regulation.
Tips: Trust your instincts. Set boundaries. Seek support.
They copy other people. You can tell who they hang out with.
Thats sooooo true! 🙌
Yep. I could tell which women he’d been with based on his energy, choice of words, confidence and ego inflation or deflation. He never understood how I knew his lies so well.
If you be quiet, look and listen it doesn’t take long for them to tell on themselves. They slip up alot
This is SO true!!
I agree- there is no genuine emotional connection. They will let you down over and over.
Great Talk Anoushka.😇
Absolutely
@@R73949 Absolutely no connection
I miss the person I was before I met her
So do I and I absolutely hate her guts now.
You shouldn't hate but what am I saying to me too bro my x narc is a slut@@kevinmccool3719
Same
Same here. I miss that guy. He was so happy.
U shud be grateful for the knowledge u now have, I myself didn't no anything about narcissists until now, and I'm happy to know what's out there now
Yeah, their arrogance, entitlement, everything about them, it's their attitude that gives it away for me, apart from the initial love bomb stage, they soon show their hand. Their hope is that your blinded by their actions at first, but a clear head can see them for what they really are. It's experience that taught me to spot them out myself though.
Let them speak,that's their downfall they talk too much.
@@AnnetteCurtain-tc4mhis very, very true. They talk too much. They tell on themselves
When I'm really missing my ex wife I listen to your videos and it sets me straight every time.
That’s smart. Re-educating yourself to unlearn the falsehoods
@@jaelenrandolph2030 it's a constant battle. But one we'll worth it.
My ex narc was a master of disguise, a liar until one day I realised that she is lying. Then I confronted her with all the evidence in front of her orthodox family. She had nothing to say. Then after that bye bye. Well I am a Scorpio myself, can't let anybody just destroy my life.
Oh my, you really nailed it when you brought up having a support system to help to get out! All I had were more narcs (large family & all narcs. yup, I'm the scapegoat) So, 65 yrs later I'm finally getting away from them all! Thanks to new support system. Way back, we just didn't have the information about narcs that we do now & I was groomed by many since birth. But my freedom is at hand! Praise God, He does answer prayers!! So keep your chin up & keep praying, there absolutely is hope. Sending love, light, peace & blessings to all.
Eventually they will tell you what they did. Cant take the weight of keeping it to themselves. Give it time
Rage: Having a great day & you're out having a nice drink and talking and laughing and, suddenly, they take offence out of the blue at something completely innocuous...raging at you in public and you're Completely blind sided...
Then they say 'It's on YOU to get this back on track and they sit there whilst you try to collect yourself after the rage , whilst trying to be 'normal'.
'Stop making small talk.. it only makes it worse!'
Being blamed for the whole thing whilst they sit in victimhood and watch you squirm, trying to get everything normal again.
All i wanted to do is run
💯
😮 Run run run if u can! 😊
Watching this captivating video stirs up painful memories of the recent end of my 4 year relationship. My beloved partner chose to depart, leaving me with an unyielding ache. Despite my relentless efforts to reconcile, I find myself grappling with frustration and an inability to envision a future without him. Despite attempts to purge him from my mind, I remain haunted by his absence, feeling compelled to express my longing here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
They Are empty vessels. Like a ship steering ITself without a captain.
To be honest they are calling for help,the horrible thing I'd they will pull you down to save themselves. That's narcissistic
@@AnnetteCurtain-tc4mh except when you're sinking, they aren't saved..they move on to the next person.
They're like robots in a human body 😂
Ghost ships
@@ellev11 fact
Most people DONT LISTEN when people talk, then, they are so surprised when they get dumped
Thats why they cant sleep at night,
They have a very bad conscience.
Makes sense
The one I knew went from working at a hooters bar,before I met her,to after it ended to being a Gardner by day,and an artist at night.
My female narcassist was a nightmare sleeping, she would toss and turn kick the quilt off
Eventually I'd have to sleep in another room
I reckon it was a guilty complex,
This was one of her strangest manorisms,
She also would say something quite nasty about someone and then hide what she had said straight after.
No conscience sorry.
@@kirkhogan2688no guilty conscience
My sister has been stuck in an endless loop with a narcissist for 18 years. I would like you to do a video on the impact on their loved ones.......its torture for us as well.
Your sister has "narcissistic fleas" they begin to show the characteristics of the abusers. They have had a vampire suck out all their great qualities and they become unable to maintain relationships and begin to lack empathy for their children, family, friends and co-workers. They are in an addiction they ate blinded by this and sometimes you must protect your own energy. You can love your sister, point her to help, but do not get sucked into her chaos. You can atch their demons. Empathy perverted is covert narcissism. You will sacrifice everything for the narc, you have "idolized" the relationship. You have become them. I just watched this happen with my best friend THE GOAT OF EMPATHY, TURNS OUT SHE IS JUST A COVERT NARC.
Same with me on/off 18 years three daughters.
They spend so much energy on being something they're not they always tell on themselves you just got to listen that's it man they totally tell on themselves
❤❤ I'm in a 18-year marriage at 10 years same thing he's doing right now at 18 years they don't change they always reveal themselves you just got to look I'm sorry I hope you can get stronger and you can just wake up and just do it one day it's hard but we can make it there's so many of us that have been trapped with a narcissistic person and learning how to live without them it is really healthy and happy and God bless your heart move forward everyday
How can they just cut you off and ignore you like you don’t exist anymore ?
Sick pychos
Because it's part of their plan,to push and pull to get what they want ,it's a primitive form of extracting what they can from you whilst doing it for them,their cute bur not clever.
They have no feelings or empathy.
Long story short, because there is no you in their sights! It's all about them. You were just a fan to them of their grandiose fantasy. And you started misbehaving by starting to question their BS, so they thought okay it's time to replace you with another device that will take your original place when you first started off with them!
Do they miss you later on after you’ve been replaced ?
When she was feeling bad she told me she hurts people. She also told me she is a free spirt when telling me about other men
That sounds just like my ex girlfriend who was cheating on me with her coworkers
And she said that she would hurt men because she felt empty and she was trying to feel something by having sex with a lot of different men just fucking nasty woman
@@garyparchment5677 it was a really bad day for you.. 🙄
They leave you with a empty gut.
Empty bank account
Exhustion
Excruciating roomination
Emptiness in yourself.
You are the best. the way you break down the different steps they go through.. I just broke up with a narcissist that i was with for 18 months and she showed all the signs but i was love bombed so bad i was blinded to the fact that i could not see what was going on Listen up people if it sounds too good to be true then it probably is not real.....
Yes I agree they try to trap u and triangulate u also!
WE went too a councellor first words that came out from him was "its her she had a bad childhood she's disturbed" when asked about his childhood he replied one word "perfect" we didn't go again non starter.
Well put 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
So true about emotional deregulation when they go into aggression and rage. He lost control of the narrative and of me and it came out ……I was no longer letting him manipulate me. This is when I knew something was seriously wrong with him.
You are truly wonderful, Anoushka! Thank youuuu
Is it just me or they get insane angry just over a small thing??! Then argue like you took their food away.
It's not just you.
Definitely not just you! My ex narc reacted the same way. Anything that makes them loose power or sole friendship will trigger them... Expect fireworks!
Nope, it's not just you.
Good to know that I still have my senses working. She always tried to make me feel exaggerated or insane. But she put so much drama in for things I wouldn't even say much about. Master of gaslights they are too!!
Some are evil
Every single word you said is so very true!
Im glad i got out of a relationship with one!!
"There is no growth to the relationship" - OMFG THIS!
I had been in an abusive relationship so long that I had forgotten my previous self. As that self has started surfacing it always seems to be at odds with my ex specifically in relation to growth of the relationship.
10 years of therapy I spent protecting her because I thought I was the problem yet I was always the one making the sacrifices. 3 more years of trying to get her to join a session lead to the end of our relationship as it exposed her desire to keep the relationship stagnant.
"How are you supposed to love me if you hate yourself" 😅 I don't suggest saying such words till you are ready to go no contact.
Her asking me how do people have time to cheat. She answered her own question but was trying to get a negative reaction out of me. These people are EVIL 😈
What I love about accounts like yours is that your offering this information for free and you are helping so many women who wouldn’t find a counsellor like you in a million years that understands narcissistic abuse! Thank you ❤
Phenomenal advice. Much love kind soul. I'm so sorry people hurt us.
"Fantasy Island"
You described exactly a woman I was dating! At the end she called me narcissist 🤣🤣
Same exact thing with me. She played victim and called me a narcissist... that's how I learned the term and with more research I saw that it was everything she was doing.
They’re frustrating as f* 😅! The little taste I got from one such narc was intense and bad enough. But it taught me a hell lot about my own relationship patterns and trauma bond. And I also became aware of how many people are stuck in such relationships.
Incredible insight and evaluation Anoushka. So helpful. Thank you.
My ex told me he was a cook at a nice restaurant when in reality he was the dishwasher. I was young then and didn’t see all the red flags unfortunately. He’s a massive malignant narcissist.
Wow I'm in the battle now I'm told you are mental. It's all so bad. I'm learning and I won't submit I'm working on escape. Separation is coming. I'm Told it's 100 percent my fault you hold the key to it all. I've felt humility twice on 10 days I was promised I see what I'm doing now I went back the tension is worse than ever. I'm a trigger I'm told well the trigger has left. Please pray for me my grown children don't want any part of this twisted abyss. 😭😭
Yeah they defo think they’re entitled! 🤬
Yes, thanks, Anoushka .👍
Again a great video Anoushka. Thank you ❤
My gosh, you really know your stuff. I think you are wonderful and so insightful. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for teaching me about who my ex husband is. ❤
True!
If one listens!
Introspection regarding self & narc!
Equates 2 discernment!
Fam, friends, flying monkeys don’t listen!
Rather believe the lies, which states facts about them!
Peace &
Blessings!❤
I think because they just want to brag to someone about what they’re doing. I look back at the things he’s said over the past 40 years and several times he told me what he was doing, but then the subject gets changed and forgotten it’s hard to explain.
I understand completely
Gaslighting
Caught a text from another woman that popped up on his watch and he looked at me and said you had to look. Sick human beings.
Anoushka I get great help from your videos, My favorite!
They got supply from me yes .. me energising and valuating him
Pay attention... Medication would never work either , Only God might spark changes..This was really good, I should cover this on my channel...
Thanks for your dilligent work and videos. I am healing from a short relationship with a guy … We were arguing every, every week - from Thursday/Friday til Saturday morning or Friday evening, had nice Sunday afternoon and Sunday. And when I was already feeling happy and revealed that we made it through on Monday and Tuesday, the cycles were coming back … Intense story short: thank you for your videos, as a part of my healing journey I am turning on the videos in the moments when I start to think or overthink or some painful memory comes out again, and with all my support I get and your videos, I am really seeing better days to come. It feels really good that I went througtt that relationship, ended it, took my lesson and now releasing it completly. With patience, self-love and feeling of self-confidence and positive for the next and hopefully the real longterm relationship. ❤
My ex narc girlfriend once let slip in conversation that she didnt see anything wrong in cheating on your partner and paying prostitutes for sex. Mind you she is religious and goes to church every Sunday.
My female ex narc told me it was only considered cheating when penis inserts into vagina. All other acts are 2 consensual adults having fun and considered harmless. So, I asked her how she would feel about me getting a BJ from another woman since it's NOT considered cheating. She didn't like that because it only applies to them when they are messing around. The amount BS these narcs come up with is just insane.
@@clintonnagy1662the audacity of their double standards. It's incredible what we put up with. The push and pull just to be beat on and cheated on and eventually discarded and then devalued to the social media world like we meant nothing and they were the victim of US?! The audacity. I since have got off social media. It breed narcissistic people from head to toe. Now she's with her new soulmate and I've heard he's everything she's been missing.... I mean I caught her cheating on me with him but yeah I mean that's their game and now within a matter of months she's moving to another state with him and they barely know eachother. We KNOW what happens when that masks slips. Watch out the clock has been ticking for the new supply we once were. It's crazy one day they love us the next day they are a ghost but still talking bad about you all while saying how happy they are on Fakebook.
@@laurenmahony2345
They are actors & the devils children
It doesn’t end well for them • soulless monsters is what they are
@@clintonnagy1662 Yea exactly. My ex narc girlfriend was very jealous of other women but didn't seem to have any issue of her having fun. They are totally hypocritical. Mind you she never admitted to cheating and in fact always preached about the sin of fornication but they will tell on themselves in conversation if you listen carefully. Eventually found out that she was cheating with 2 guys including her ex husband. I'm sure her body count was much higher than that.
When you understand the game you have a choice. Play or not. You also have a voice use it or not.
This is so very true.
It's strange when you don't see them anymore, you can see all the lies,the gaslighting crystal clear and how badly they used you.
This video has high lighted alot of things that happened in my relationship. I'm glad my ex don't exist no more he definitely showed his true colours.
A world of fantasy ! You couldn’t make it up ? Absolutely dreamers I had 7 years of it ! Received a phone call recently more stories and dreams 😅
It's hard to believe in someone that mirrored you.
Yeah indeed, the best part,
They really believe in their mind these fantasies are real
Easiest way to get them to tell on themselves is to confront them with their abuse and see their reaction. If they at least own the fact that they hurt you - regardless of intent, they're not a narcissist.
They do when we first met she actually told me the truth in the first place but I didn’t see it until I left
Absolutely true!
I see all of this now that I’m moving forward another thing I can see is an uneveness in giving and taking such as gifts or time.
All NARCISSISTS who tell on themselves are like jokes that write themselves.
It’s a life sentence without committing any crime, living with a narcissist doesn’t get better with time. Get out when it is safe to do.
good video yet again, thank you love ❤️
Thank you 🙏🏻
The creepiest thing out of Allllll of this, with him, was the SHEER and UTTER detachment he had for his mother when she died. “Yeah, I miss her, but it’s all over now.” Wtf???? Scared the Hell outta me.
Omg you nailed it
Listening to my inner voice and trusting that over the narc's words always works for me😈
Why are they so insecure with themselves?
Can't they find some solace in their deeper relation with God?
Because they can't access their honest self to admit guilt and receive forgiveness. Their core wound is hard-coated and inaccessible.
My mother in law told on their plans SO MUCH! By her venom I was able to figure out what he heck was going on!
mine admitted to love bombing me. This sent me down a rabbit whole of attachment styles and narcissism. I'm not a phycologist, there are days I believe my x-partner is a covert narcissist, others I thing a fearful avoidant. In the end, it doesn't matter. I tried my best. I am free and I will be the best parent I can be to my kids, and inform my students (designers) about narcissism because most of us are highly empathetic people due to our chosen profession having to design for many other people. I'll also encourage them to take psychology classes with their electives. Some days these video's really help, others I feel like I am beating my self up. As I said it doesn't matter, it's done I've moved on. I'll be more vigilant in the future.
Your show is amazing 👏 🤩 😍
Mine couldn't cry or show emotion when making their "false" claims of being the victim, when they were lying about what some one supposedly did to them, but when some would call them out and leave, they would break down.
Literally
I've seen people claiming they're neurodivergent to justify their narcicism. And i somehow agree, these people are unable to learn and grow with all the implications this might cause in the individual that "lives with narcisim". I dont agree with identifying with "neurodivergent", only a narcisit would find meaning in that.
The narcissist in dealing with has selective lack of empathy.
It makes me think she was abused by someone close to her who should have been her protector. Or she perceives that someone abused her. It's complicated to grow up in a uninformed environment.
It's part of the hustler code to say what they intend to do but you have to listen carefully
If you let them they will slip up in the pack of lies but they don't want to accept it
I used to think that he accused me of stuff he did because he felt if he could betray or hurt me while "loving me so much"(as he claimed) that he was only worried I was capable of doing that to him no matter much I loved him. Idk if that makes sense. However I learned the hard way thru all these years, that he is incapable of true unconditional love and every single accusation was in fact, admission of what he was doing and nothing more. 💔
In time....all whom surrounded them...do learn!
I’m happy for my encounter with narcissist…. They awaken me
Exactly never the villan always getting cheated on or choked out or abused in some fashion but no mention of what lead up to these actions..
What meds??
Last night I had a conversation with my now ex-husband, his excuse for why our marriage failed was because he is in Mexico as a personal trainer stating he's working to make ends meet and didn't have time. A whole year I waited for him to get his s*** together and nothing only a couple words every couple months, no explanations no effort and yet he is pissed off that we are now divorced. I took care of him and his family for a whole year in the beginning of our marriage while he was sick when he got better he said it was his turn to take care of me and that's basically when he disappeared. I told him last night there is no excuse especially working as a personal trainer as to why you are too busy to have a marriage with your own wife, he acts like he's a brain surgeon. I told him you don't do people like that when they have been there for you in your worst of times and if you're only excuses you had to work then yes I'm happy the divorce happened
True 🙌
Yeah, she never slept the whole night ,ever,
Remember her daughters commenting on her sleep patterns
You are bang on,
Guilty conscious, etc etc
Yeah they do...damn...just didnt pick up on it at the time...they love to talk...i realise now i just had to listen... @ask Anoushka im catching up with your vids wish i had found your channel alot earlier.. you explain everything very clear your so different from anyone else on youtube a unique structure that i have not heard before so thank you...had to add yes energy sapping i lost 2st in weight stressing was 11st gained some back but yh damn...and now she just msg saying she will always love me after 20msg of abuse...
On rare occasions I explode, it happened recently (unfortunately) I am quite easy going usually and this leads others to disrespect me at times. If the disrespect continues I can erupt, especially if I've been suppressing myself from speaking up. It can be very damaging but it causes a change in their previously unchangeable behavior. I wish I was better at maintaining my boundaries without that 😕 I am an Aries..and I don't "think" I'm a narcissist"..but I could be wrong? I certainly have empathy and I don't make up stories!
I was told I did something to make some women at work mad. I dont know what or who said it. But, I have a feeling a narcissist did it to play the victim and get some control or set me up. Should I call HR to protect myself? The managers are giving me some awkward looks.
Yes absolutely
I went through this at work too. Yes I say call HR, but only to get it on record. Dont expect to get support. They already covered HR too. Its more likely you will have to leave, but the more people that call HR over time may eventually help one of their targets.
My ex narc soooo told on himself 😂😂. Ended up in jail for stalking, breaching restraining orders etc. 😊😊
AGREED
They do ❤❤❤❤❤❤
He said one afternoon: nobody. Can fake a laughter better then I do
In his sick mind he is the only one in the world .
Now he knows he is a narc
Devilish inside
Your first statement is that the narcissists situation is medical and then you state that they choose their behavior. It can’t be both. At the end of the day, you and I know that they know what they know what they’re doing.
It's been 8 days i haven't eaten anything because they left me after causing so much havoc and damage to my life and relationships with friends. I feel so empty
@ultravioletcanary go for a walk in the woods and listen to the happy birds. Look at the autumnal trees. The yellow and orange trees will cheer you up. Then eat your favorite food later or some ice cream. There is some new guy waiting on you to get better and come into his life. So, get busy. You will heal, and I bet you are pretty and will be happy with him. Just stay busy as you heal. Good luck.
Remember 1 thing,
The narc deep inside feels horrible , its all a show for the outside. Narcs has alot of voices in their head telling them all day long how pathetic unlovable low life creatures they are.
Please try to eat, please you have to try, you have to do this! Don't let them defeat you. The end game of most narcissists is to unalive you, please don't let this happen to you ,don't be a victim.. Just get rid of them and move on, there's very little hope for them to ever change. As a self aware, diagnosed narcissist, I'm telling you these are facts.
Pisces sun sign .. Scorpio rising sign .. with a Taurus moon created one I knew .. do star signs effect the spectrum of a narcissist? ✨☯️✨🕉️✨☪️✨🌌✨🙏🏻✨
1:50 “Incurable.” Science never forecloses the possibility of further understanding and breakthroughs. We are only beginning to understand Cluster B disorders and much progress has already been made. Having had to interact with four NPD individuals, I understand the temptation to demonize and engage in splitting/black and white thinking. Given that 20% of the military suffer from NPD this is more than an interpersonal exhortation but is political as well.