S. at YT really hates being prepared, being wide, wide awake, using resources wisely, n making e world a better place. It's one thing if u r a child n CANNOT protect yourself as well as an adult; there r people n places that will be better 4 seeking help. But as u grow up, if u r not becoming more competent, then sth has gone very seriously wrong. Helping s. get a PFD on once? Twice? Three times? Putting a PFD on s. who is simply limp? Or who is actively fighting you? Use resources wisely: helping those people is NOT a wise use of resources. Sorry for e threadjack, Priscilla. YT won't save my comment. Sigh...
There are several black ladies married to south asian men in our community, they are seen positively. I also get this may not be in every place but the only group of people I've seen really vocal that men should not marry BW is BM.
They’re unhinged. To those people black women are good enough to be servants, mules or exploited, but not good enough to be treated as equals, to marry or be at the forefront.
Leave black women alone. Y'all better help yourselves. Black women are tired! All we are doing now is helping ourselves! Who's helping black women, though??
Everyone wants black to help them but who is helping blk women? Girl bye.. I’m over all of this. Black women don’t need to help anyone but ourselves. Let everyone else figure it out on their own. We are tired.
I'm white but was raised in Michigan and lived in majority black communities. I think this comes from the communal structure of those neighborhoods. Like where I come from, people look out for one another. I've lived in Colorado for many years and it's much more individualistic. When I think of places that are the most communal or neighborly, I'm thinking of places that have higher concentration of black folks. Idk about walking up to a black person at random but if I were down and out, I'd be better off in a prodimently black community than a prominently white area. Karen's be calling the cops on a Jesus statue 😂
@@frozenheart7133you just proved our point once again “I’d be better off in a predominantly black area than I would in a white community “ 😒🙄😒🙄 we don’t care. You will NEVER understand so we don’t care that you’re white you still depend on us for your safety hence what you said. Please exit stage left
Yup they are looking for women that will take care of them!!!! Nope not me! 😂😂😂😂. I mind my business and my way, unless someone is dying, I’m calling 911 and keep it going.
@Brandy205 they welcome that loud & aggressive nature only when it's beneficial to them. Once you're advocating for yourself, here come the insults of not being feminine or ladies. Chiiiiile 😂
I think all is about perception. If you were hurt by someone else, I’m sorry for you. But you’re looking at humanity through that lens and criticize everyone and everything through that lens it seems. I am always who’s always willing to help others, and I’ve been taken advantage of by others because I ALOWED IT. But when I took ownership of my mistakes, I realized that it was not all them, that I was letting those things happen because I confused being a good person with allowing others to take advantage of the situation. The way I see his speech, he was paying tribute to black women, he wasn’t telling others to go get a black woman when they are in trouble, that’s preposterous because there’s no race or gender in general that would do that as a general rule.
I have mixed feelings. Im glad that bw are being acknowledged for actually being the opposite of the stereotype...a lot of us are actually loving and friendly but.....im sad because its not our job. We need ppl to be helpful and contribute and be kind to us. Ppl just coming to take and take.
I agree that he was probably speaking from a heartfelt place. His mother knew the strength BW have always shown. Not necessarily considering that society has always seen us as the salvation without appreciation. It should have been a BM to acknowledge the courage and fortitude it took for BW to survive to present day. However, all we have to appreciate each other is ourselves. The often say if the black community actually stood together we could do more collectively. I go one step further. If we could stop the division amongst BW around the globe it would be a force to be reckoned. Just my take.
Don't be..They have always known the stereotype isn't true, why do you think they constantly look for black women to fix every damned thing ?? Be real with yourself. Are you so thirsty for validation from people that wouldn't spit on you if you were on fire??😒
Stop taking advantage of black women. We are not a public resource. I'm sick and tired of people attempting to befriend me for free access to my labor, talents, and resources. This is why I avoid people as much as possible now.
BABAY TRUTH!!!!!! They only want to befriend us cuz they're looking for someone to give them free labor with no reciprocity. Fuck that leave me alone and go help yourself
EXACTLY ‼️Soooo his mother told him to look for “ shield “ in a blk woman instead of looking to God, his OWN mother or within❓❓❓ We are woman and we CANT fight off EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE ‼️‼️‼️ Just leave BLK WOMEN ALONE‼️ This is NOT a compliment ‼️😒 We have stood up for ppl who have turned treasonous towards us ‼️ We DONT NEED ANYMORE RESPONSIBILITIES ‼️🛑❌ LEAVE US ALONE‼️
It is giving Mammy vibes. Leave us alone. We are not the saviors of the world. I agree with the second woman. If you want to give us princess treatment, come see us. Otherwise...➡️➡️➡️➡️
Why don't they get their own women to help them??... What is this conversation actually saying about how some males perceive their own women. Why are going outside of their own communities to seek help and support from black women??
I said this in another comment but I think this guy made his point wrong i'm from a blended community also in UK (south asian and black, a lot are here in the UK) and as kids we are told to seek out woc if we think we are in danger/being stalked. It totally goes both ways he didnt say it because hes probably from one of those communities but he doesnt know its not like that everywhere.
@@AK47_Aki I'm also from the UK. But, I'm not going to waste my energy on defending a community that does nothing for black women... Outside of lips service. I know because I live around them as well. I know how they operate.
@@AK47_Aki He did not say woc, he said black women. He should have said women from his race or white women. We are not your protectors. Have these asian men been castrated that they want women from a whole other race to protect them? Isn't it the job of the men to protect and help women? Why are you looking for protection from the least protected group of women in the world?
If we don't have a personal bond, or you've never helped me don't look for me to help you. I am a bw who's quick to tell you to get the hell out my face. I don't care if I am your last hope!
He's giving benevolent misogynoir. Nobody needs the mammy trope to persist unless it is a cautionary historical case study that undoes the impact of racism relating to this issue. He needs to stop that.
It is only the BP who grow up in predominantly black countries…. They have blind spots to WS and r@yc!sm and a lot of the time they just don’t get it….. And the sad part is they pass along their “cluelessness” to their kids who may not have grown up in the same predominantly black space as them SMH
And as a BW from France I'm tired of this too! It is so frustrating because it make me think of my Mom who doesn't get any help when needed but would not hesitate one second to help any strangers who need help. I always have to "yell" at her not to...
I don't see how so many black women were fawning over this man 😕 and it just reveals how they feel about us what they know about us but look how they treat us 🤔 😂 it's laughable everyone wants a black women to build them up and when they do they are left in the lurch. Thanks for the compliment but we good we don't need your two cents he needs to go talk about how his people are treating their WOMEN
I get what he's saying. But, it's ultimately not black women's job to always come to others' rescue. Especially when we are not truly supported and protected.
Full stop, NO. While he may mean well, it's time to unpack that. Although im, personally, inherently kind and helpful, I'm not flattered in the least by these types of "shout outs" and "praises". At some point, reciprocity of our abilities and care needs to be second nature.
Correct is belebolent misogynistic at core .... It doesnt matter the color of the skin, is men thinking WOMEN NEED TO SAVE THEM, which this very dangerous narrative that women love to help, to edúcate, to save men .... No, i don't , cuz 99,9% of the type this is not reciprocated .... I seen it AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN, women doing the most to save evey single men around, making them better human beings, helping them in need, but if the woman is in need, they dont care, not their problem, they are busy, they dont have the time neither want to, cuz what are you going to give me in exchange. MEN DONT DO ANYTHING FROM THE KIDNESS OF THEIR HEART, EVERYTHING IS TRANSACTIONAL, and if men help women, believe me, the want US to pay them with our bodies, cuz in their mind You gain anything from helping someone...men are selfish by Nature but they want all the women of the world to coddle them like little kids ... no, i'm tired !
Any non-black person, especially women, has NO RIGHT telling us how to feel about this. It's best to be quiet, sit back, and listen if you really care, but you don't & that's part of the issue! The unmitigated gall to attempt to call us bitter, argumentative, and ungrateful for feeling how we feel. You are not a black woman. Check yourself & let black women speak. Whether we accept it or not, it's not YOUR place. It's not about YOU. How dare you! That's a lot of yalls problem now! SMH
Yeah. I saw the cave-dweller who posted this with hashtags like #racism #ally and all that other nonsense. She had the nerve to tell us we should be grateful that this man appreciates us. As if some asian calling me the help adds value to my life.
The Second Lady in the light blue hoodie I HIGHLY agree with. Now to any non-black person who genuinely thanks black people and gives us credit for what we are great at, that’s different. That Indian man was in a time of need and I think it was sweet of him thanking the black community. But then there’s a majority of people who like she said: see us as black labor. You see: non-black people KNOWS the value/how dope black people are. The more you learn about history and whatnot, you will see often that we are the blueprint. Especially when it came to the establishment of America. And to this day: non-blacks will still go to the black person for labor, help, creative ideas etc etc and I can’t f*** with that. I even have to check myself when I’m TOO available/too helpful (sucks when you have a big heart). But to anyone who reads this comment: please do not exclusively look for black people to save you. Not all of us are built the same way and anyone can help you (based on your intuition on who to trust). Only look for black people when that’s your only option and you’re just desperate. Not as a way to become “saved” because we are no longer your emotional blanket and nurturer. With all due respect: Let it Go🗣️🙅🏾♀️
When i first saw the video I kinda felt admired by it. But then I realized the pain we go thru from giving so much.. And I also looked at his IG and his girlfriend was white.... I was like yup...we are helpers and slaves to him. No thanks
@@klaudinegarcia8932 welp you can hope but reality is he most likely is😂😂😂. I can assure in time of danger he'll protect his yt gf but let a bw be the clean up
We should never get overly invested in people outside of ourselves because their "compliments" may not be genuine and for the mere fact that his gf is less melanated, his compliment could have been kept to himself. At that point it's pandering to get engagement and more money
His gf is white….yeah I’m checked out. Black men do this too. Uplift us for our labor don’t see the worth in making us actual wife’s, and genuine partners.
Right? Like our place in society is to be available to serve everyone else, anytime... anywhere... anyone... Why's that obligation JUST ON US???? And why don't we receive any of this in return?
We really have given too much over the generations to the point we're taken for granted by everybody and something, not even someone, but something to be used.
You can always come to a black woman for help no lie. That’s why black men take advantage I’m always helping random ppl My mama always helps people, strangers, family & friends. She’s a great woman ❤
Most don’t approve it’s taboo, RARELY happens. I’m surprised he even said that from experience they don’t like us and stereotype so I’m very surprised he said that
Too many Indian mamas are color-ist so they'll actually overlook her background if she's light-skinned. For Middle-eastern and North Africans, both patriarchal, they often (reluctantly) accept Black women but they don't want their daughters marrying Black men.
I think he meant it as a nice sentiment but it’s a dangerous sentiment because I no longer am ready to be nice to non-black women. Based off of how we are always so caring as black women but a small group of people stick their necks out for us when we need help. Kindness is not given back to us and the cup is running empty.
I remember seeing the guy's vid a couple of days ago and I started shaking my head while he was talking. I appreciate him trying to show love and appreciation but don't look to me for that. Especially from highly colorist and racist communities. Although it comes naturally for us to help, I'm waiting for the love and care to START being reciprocated. Until then, I'm joining the other women and centering only me and mine in this messed up world.
Nah!! Get somebody else to do it!! We're tired!! Also, how many of these men get threatened to be disowned by their families if they seek romantic relationships with us?
The #1 thing we need to do is help ourselves, practice self-preservation (preserve our resources of all kinds for ourselves, and encourage one another to do the same. We have been a great resource to others because we are very resourceful people - all we need to do is stop giving to others and pour all those resources into ourselves. I’m doing my best to look at my life from a very objective standpoint before I do anything - am I well-rested? No? Then don’t give. Am I financially secure & relieved myself of all financial stress? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great physical condition? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great mental condition? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great spiritual condition? No? Then don’t give. We haven’t had generational wealth and peace and protection. Those of us who want a better quality of life are going to do best by very rarely giving of ourselves in any selfless ways. If it’s reciprocal, ofc invest in your community/your own connection & protection & validation. If not, say no. Get used to saying no. I’m a human being first. I’m a woman, second. I’m black, third. I’m not God, not a man, I’m not a mammy. I’m me & my full time job is taking care of myself in every which way I can ❤️🩹
At first I was like ok appreciation. Not at all. If you find this black woman leave me alone especially if you're looking for a cape. My love and help is reserved for children not adults who create their own storms.
I’ve always dated outside my race, every time I would date these men would literally say to me. Oh my gosh you are amazing, you help me so much, my exes were so lazy. They didn’t do anything. You go above and beyond. But they never really took care of me like they took care of their exes. I don’t like this look for black women we’re not mules we’re not servants and we need to burn the cape for everybody. I was not good enough for them to spend money on me provide for me and treat me like a queen. Just there to help and be their cheerleader. But I also noticed that black women help other races of people before they will help another black woman.
This is why I’ve been selfish all my life. I know it rubs my man and friends and family the wrong way but I’ve never not put me first. My parents constantly put me on a pedestal and I never jumped off it 💅🏾
@@CandieP put yourself first. As a woman you can never go wrong with that, with that being said don't be too selfish cuz you look up one day and find yourself by yourself and no one cares to be bother with you.
Black people in general are lovely, it's just sad that people think black people are subservient because we're powerful ❤also we're not helpers because we're black, there are some black women who don't give a damn and they're not wrong for not wanting to 'build and save '❤
I’m not a fan of this!! He may have meant well, but it gives the impression that we’re the mammies of the world. Coming off like we’re help mates!! A lot of men who date out, always state we’re strong, down to earth and more low maintenance, hard working and sting . This to me is not really a compliment.
The reality is non blacks see us as the help. Nothing more and nothing less. It’s sad that some black people think that this is a compliment. It is not. However, this is the truth, we are helpful, kind and empathetic. This kindness has been abused and I think should be withdrawn entirely. When non blacks ask me for help I either ignore them tell them ‘I am not the help’. Certain stereotypes should not be perpetuated and won’t be for me. Peace ✌🏾
@@MiscellaneousMeMeright say what you feel comfortable and want. You’re entitled to that not what people tell you to say 😒🙄. I would’ve said the same thing
Being heralded as "THE HELP" is NOT a compliment. It's one thing to tell people "Black women are kind and helpful" but it's quite another thing to tell people "to go ask Black women for help when they need it." The latter creates a sense of entitlement on the part of those who need help and most importantly, creates a burden/responsibility on the part of Black women (which is essentially free labor - sound familiar?) None of this provides help FOR or TO Black women - this service is only one way. So again, we're burdened yet ignored as women. How much you wanna bet his mother didn't tell him to go out in the 🌎 and find a Black woman to marry?
This is true especially Asian and white people they will not help at all they pretend they don’t see anything other races are not helping no one let alone their own
Notice the message is find a black woman for help not find a black women to marry/provide/protect/treat well. Find a black woman to use. That’s the message. No thank you.
Also, notice when u ask Black Women who we should go to when we need help they say other Black Women. So we are expected to help EVERYONE else but we are only expected to get help just from each other? Do u hear yourself?🤔
What a backhanded compliment. And the mother didn’t say anything about him helping them in return. Such a selfish mindset just scanning the world for people they can use. Nothing was mentioned about what he could give back in return
This never occurred to me, but I’ve never turned down someone in need. I can say that black folks GIVE and donate without being noticed and they give consistently to their church, their fam, and their neighbor unless crossed. In my neighborhood, I’m the only woman of color (mixed) and the only one who shares food from the garden and there are 12 gardeners in my street.
This is why I ALWAYS MIND MY BLACK WOMAN BUSINESS! Family, friends, significant other. It don’t matter. I put myself first regardless. Sorry not sorry. The more I have came to the rescue for others the more it was unappreciated.
Poor guy tried to do something nice and it back fired. I get what he was trying to say, but unfortunately it makes it sound you can always tread on a Black women when you need something. Use them they like it. It's the same as the Black Partner affect. If you want to look better get a black girlfriend or wife. My grandmother's have always taught us to make enough food for leftovers because you never know who might be hungry. They were that type of women, but I realized the world loves to use us. Use us any way they can and then act like they don't know us once they get their come up or find someone else. But I appreciate that he appreciates us.
I agree. And most of the people and children I have help have been other black people. I am that type of black woman. I like that about myself, and nobody can make me change that.
This sentiment is only positive when it's reciprocal. Black women are not the physical manifestation of the giving tree. We are not here to work endlessly for others with no return.
Well I'm going to be honest with you...BW have been used and abused by BM for so long (people see and KNOW what's going on) that they just assume that BW are okay with it... we're really the only group of women that are going around calling our biological male counterparts "kings" but those kings haven't built anything for US...BW have given BM EVERYTHING and required NOTHING in return so people just assume based on that ALONE that BW are okay with being used...ditch BM and start focusing on our sisterhood and that WILL change...but I know MOST BW won't do that 🤷♀️
Btw, he was reacting to shytngigs video here. He wasn’t just talking about his experience with black women but also the whole situation regarding how people disrespect black women when they are the most caring people.
I get what he is saying, minorities get it, especially black ppl we understand, blk women are considerate to others, but yah like he pointed out blk women are not protected so we not doing that ish no more. Ppl got us F up in the worst way. We taking care of ourselves after what been conveyed for years now. So no take care of yourself.
I will always do my best to help a child in need, but other than that I burnt my cape. Fight your own battles I am not your mammy. If you can’t revere and pour love on me in times of peace and happiness please do not expect me to fight for you or your cause in times of pain. I will quietly support your at my home while I rest in my femininity while you fight your own battles
Maybe that’s why ppl hate me bc I act helpless af. I can’t pick up ish, can’t go nowhere, can’t do any favors. Lmao, heck no mf. You help me with some ish 😂😊
I've heard that sentiment before, it's the same vibes as "stronge black woman" a back handed compliment. It also leans on the Mammy sterotype. Apparently BW are only good for saving others and supporting others, not good enough to love, not good enough to spoil.
Leave us ALONE! How come every time people want to go viral they invoke the black woman. 1:53 The question is: did his mother ever teach him to PROTECT BLACK WOMEN or only to use black women for HIS protection. Please don't come find me. Everyone only wants to take from black women. 😢😢
I'm in my healing and "No" season. No to any fools, and I will take the time necessary to heal. I'm not going to let anybody, family or otherwise, push me into distractions. No! I'm not Harriet Tubman and the Underground Railroad for fools.
3:02 (white lady here for context) thoughts before the video because engagement is queen. It seems flattering at first like 'aw they feel safe' but it also feels like transferring work from where it should - for example instead of approaching an employee at the counter of a nearby store. Also a skintone doesn't determine someones personality, there are plenty of horrible people with various melanin levels. Women of colour also don't need the hassle a parent/employee looking for a misplaced child to find them and start making (racist) assumptions about how they came to be in possession of said child
Don't come looking for me bc these are the same ppl who don't want black women to get a promotion or a raise even though you've had a help every Karen and Becky in the office complete their projects but they remember to thank you publicly when they get a big ole bonus on that same project.
Imo his mom’s observation isn’t the issue, because a lot of times this is true. The problem is the lack of reciprocity. If so many people think that we would help and support them, they should do the same for us.
That sounds great and all, and this man seems genuine (but who really knows). It goes to show people know the strength and love of bw, but it's been a constant run to bw for help, but lack of help to bw. The amount of bashing bw untul they are needed is ridiculous
Lmao he said my mom wasnt a pick me... this isnt anything new. People have always known to turn to us for help or to be saved. I second what the second woman said, look for us to spoil because we deserve it the most and yet too many of us receive it the least.
That's what I keep saying but MOST BW are uninterested and it's mainly because BW are in competition with each other and can't stand each other... it's really sad that we are all we truly have and we do more for others who HATE us, and BM are leading the charge with that hate...I'm honestly just tired of everyone and that's slowly but surely including BW as well and their worship of their BIGGEST predator---BM...
You know what, With all the anti black, anti black women, anti WOMEN that I see DAILY it was nice and he was talking about HIS experience and saying Thank You. And it our natured to wanted to help, Yes lot more people should be willing help, that what I got ☺️
When there was the luxury Black girl movements (as much as I agree with the criticism of capitalism and classism etc) we all witnessed everyone being bitter and mad at us for spoiling ourselves since no one was gonna do it for us. And you are telling me these are the same people who try to humble Black women, who all declare how they will turn to us in need of help like we are their Lord and Saviour? But won't devote themselves to our well being? Interesting. This is the same relationship people have with God, they blame Him for anything wrong but when they need help, they crawl to Him then become entitled, ungrateful and arrogant.
@@mariabrown6926 By reforcing steryotypes about how black people dress and such. Like imagine if the trend was the "native american wife" effect, and all of the sudden the dude started using headdresses and paintings etc. Its just steryotypes.
The "Black Wife effect" was literally just showing how happy & put together the men look AFTER marrying a BW... That's it. Is it problematic because it's a black woman with a white man...👀
@@mariabrown6926People as a whole will expect bw to do for them but aren’t pouring anything into bw. Not anything wrong with those individuals who have a great marriage but the message it sends to majority that don’t really care unless we benefit them.
I think, in general, it is look for any woman and due to the societal standards of beauty, if you do not measure up to that standard, you are put into a category of a work horse. Usually the dumpy, overweight, older women in my culture are the ones that people tend to gravitate towards in order to use. From family to society. I've seen this my entire life. We are seen as non-human, no feelings and given very little respect in general from just about everyone. I have even had people approach me and aggressively ask me for help and if I say, NO, I get verbally bashed. A couple of examples in my own life: my family insisted that I bring my alcoholic brother into my home, regardless of how hard I worked to build my life and no matter how many things I was involved in with my old church I used to attend, I was the "go to" whenever something new came up and they needed volunteers. I had to actually semi isolate myself to get away from the constant bombardment.
These folks see us as nothing more than the help. It is not a compliment. They don't see us as equals or romantic partners or friends. We are simply the help.
The only other people I’m protective of is black women and people that are directly related to me. I know we don’t always take care of each other sometimes but I be damn if I let someone else play in our face in any capacity. F that!!!
![Black Women think they are SUPERIOR to Black Men: The Table [preview]](/img/n.gif)
Link to the video I couldn’t add.
vm.tiktok.com/ZGd1vP3uX/
Thanks for the love and support 😊
Thank you Miss Priscilla❤
@@Sanderson5CLCwelcome hun 😊
S. at YT really hates being prepared, being wide, wide awake, using resources wisely, n making e world a better place.
It's one thing if u r a child n CANNOT protect yourself as well as an adult; there r people n places that will be better 4 seeking help. But as u grow up, if u r not becoming more competent, then sth has gone very seriously wrong.
Helping s. get a PFD on once? Twice? Three times? Putting a PFD on s. who is simply limp? Or who is actively fighting you? Use resources wisely: helping those people is NOT a wise use of resources.
Sorry for e threadjack, Priscilla. YT won't save my comment. Sigh...
Those are the same moms that tell their sons not to marry a black women 🙄
Exactly !!!
That part
There are several black ladies married to south asian men in our community, they are seen positively. I also get this may not be in every place but the only group of people I've seen really vocal that men should not marry BW is BM.
Facts!!!!
They’re unhinged. To those people black women are good enough to be servants, mules or exploited, but not good enough to be treated as equals, to marry or be at the forefront.
Leave black women alone. Y'all better help yourselves. Black women are tired! All we are doing now is helping ourselves! Who's helping black women, though??
@sxybm You are so right. And to answer your question, no one is helping us except ourselves.
Right
Facts!
Exactly this y I put headphones in n started to just ignore everyone
This comment deserves an award! 🙌🏾🙌🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🏆
Everyone wants black to help them but who is helping blk women?
Girl bye.. I’m over all of this. Black women don’t need to help anyone but ourselves. Let everyone else figure it out on their own. We are tired.
I'm white but was raised in Michigan and lived in majority black communities. I think this comes from the communal structure of those neighborhoods. Like where I come from, people look out for one another. I've lived in Colorado for many years and it's much more individualistic. When I think of places that are the most communal or neighborly, I'm thinking of places that have higher concentration of black folks.
Idk about walking up to a black person at random but if I were down and out, I'd be better off in a prodimently black community than a prominently white area. Karen's be calling the cops on a Jesus statue 😂
@@frozenheart7133you just proved our point once again “I’d be better off in a predominantly black area than I would in a white community “ 😒🙄😒🙄 we don’t care. You will NEVER understand so we don’t care that you’re white you still depend on us for your safety hence what you said. Please exit stage left
They laughed and heckled the strong, independent black woman NOW they’re looking for said strong, independent black woman to come save the day. 😂
Exactly 😂😂 I thought we were “too masculine”
Yup they are looking for women that will take care of them!!!! Nope not me! 😂😂😂😂. I mind my business and my way, unless someone is dying, I’m calling 911 and keep it going.
@@flutatious_music4 Exactly! We’re too loud, aggressive and angry for no apparent reason ❤️🤭😉 So why would we want to save anyone?
😂😂 The contradiction and audacity😂😂
@Brandy205 they welcome that loud & aggressive nature only when it's beneficial to them. Once you're advocating for yourself, here come the insults of not being feminine or ladies.
Chiiiiile 😂
Its not a compliment. It's the entitlement
Bingo 🎯
Thank you!
Exactly no one is entitled to our free labor
This!!! 💯💯💯
Leave us alone!!! I'm tired.
🤦🏾♀️🤮 Right!
So essentially black women = the help. 🙄 😑 But let a black women get upset, have standards, or be successful she’s everything but a child of God. SMH
Exactly! It's a no for me. I refuse.
EXACTLY!! SMDH 🤦♀️
I’m not helping these men with nothing , I’m not no saviour !!!
For real, then when they won’t need u no more, they will just abandon u like ur nothing.
He meant as a child
NEVER HELP A MAN especially they are MOST UNGRATEFUL
Exactly don't understand why Americans see worst in everything@@Getthejobasap
I think all is about perception. If you were hurt by someone else, I’m sorry for you. But you’re looking at humanity through that lens and criticize everyone and everything through that lens it seems. I am always who’s always willing to help others, and I’ve been taken advantage of by others because I ALOWED IT. But when I took ownership of my mistakes, I realized that it was not all them, that I was letting those things happen because I confused being a good person with allowing others to take advantage of the situation. The way I see his speech, he was paying tribute to black women, he wasn’t telling others to go get a black woman when they are in trouble, that’s preposterous because there’s no race or gender in general that would do that as a general rule.
That mom who told her son that black women will always help, how would she react if he dated and married a black woman?
I can tell you cause that’s how my fiancée mother is. She absolutely hates me and believes I’m a lazy person.
That was only for when he was young and in trouble, they don’t even like dark Indians 😂
Exactly
This!!!!
She would disown him.
I have mixed feelings. Im glad that bw are being acknowledged for actually being the opposite of the stereotype...a lot of us are actually loving and friendly but.....im sad because its not our job. We need ppl to be helpful and contribute and be kind to us. Ppl just coming to take and take.
This is my feeling.
We are not mules and servants. People need to repay all this help and comfort we are just giving everyone.
I agree that he was probably speaking from a heartfelt place. His mother knew the strength BW have always shown. Not necessarily considering that society has always seen us as the salvation without appreciation. It should have been a BM to acknowledge the courage and fortitude it took for BW to survive to present day. However, all we have to appreciate each other is ourselves. The often say if the black community actually stood together we could do more collectively. I go one step further. If we could stop the division amongst BW around the globe it would be a force to be reckoned. Just my take.
I agree 👏🏾👏🏾
Don't be..They have always known the stereotype isn't true, why do you think they constantly look for black women to fix every damned thing ?? Be real with yourself. Are you so thirsty for validation from people that wouldn't spit on you if you were on fire??😒
💯 💯 💯 💯 💯
Who's helping black women, I wonder..
💯 It’s always crickets when we need help.
Not a fuqkin soul
You know no damn one is helping us not even BM
Other black women😭
Virtually no one. In my own family the men are not. Unless it directly benefits them. Selfish and narcissistic.
Absolutely NOT‼️
LEAVE US ALONE‼️📣‼️‼️‼️‼️
This is NOT A COMPLIMENT‼️❌
Yassssss
... But who do Black women look for when we're "in trouble"? 🤨😡
Tf
A black woman 😂❤
God because only he loved us
You’re on your own sis 😱
@@collettedaniels3884sad but true
Man in the sky!
Stop taking advantage of black women. We are not a public resource.
I'm sick and tired of people attempting to befriend me for free access to my labor, talents, and resources.
This is why I avoid people as much as possible now.
If these men are not trashing black women for clicks and views, they want us to be ride or die perpetually. I'M NOT DOING IT!
Girl 😂😂😂... same!
BABAY TRUTH!!!!!! They only want to befriend us cuz they're looking for someone to give them free labor with no reciprocity. Fuck that leave me alone and go help yourself
It's exhausting, unfulfilling, rarely reciprocated, and again...exhausting
Please don’t be flattered by this comment or see this as a compliment. People can abuse your niceness and take you for granted.
EXACTLY ‼️Soooo his mother told him to look for “ shield “ in a blk woman instead of looking to God, his OWN mother or within❓❓❓
We are woman and we CANT fight off EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE ‼️‼️‼️
Just leave BLK WOMEN ALONE‼️ This is NOT a compliment ‼️😒
We have stood up for ppl who have turned treasonous towards us ‼️ We DONT NEED ANYMORE RESPONSIBILITIES ‼️🛑❌
LEAVE US ALONE‼️
Yep! They recognize what Black women bring to the table & how they tend to be good mothers, yet they hate them!
Exactly
Exactly- they’re looking for their mammy mule.
THEY DO EXACTLY THAT 😅
It is giving Mammy vibes. Leave us alone. We are not the saviors of the world. I agree with the second woman. If you want to give us princess treatment, come see us. Otherwise...➡️➡️➡️➡️
Exactly! Exit stage left!
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
This I am tired of them putting black women into the mammy trope they just looking to use black women .. Indians don’t even like black people
This I am tired of them putting black women into the mammy trope they just looking to use black women .. Indians don’t even like black people
Yes !
Who comes to save US?! 😒
Don't look for us, wi TIYAD enuh!! Left us alone!!!
Exactly
Talk truth mek Dem hear
😂🤣❤🇹🇹 ALL FACTS!!!
A mi fi tell mi luv 😩
My mother passed at an early age from saving everyone BUT herself. Watching mommy go through that burned my cape. Love & Light! ♥️✨
Sorry for loss I’ve seen this in my family as well, this is the cost Black women pay for being there for everyone else.❤
@@Phoenixx333 Thank you, sis. I just wanted to share in hopes to help another woman that may need the confirmation. ♥️✨
Heavy on the “parasitic relationship!” We tired……
_Thank you for contacting blk women. This number has been disconnected. Goodbye_
😂😂👌🏿
😂😂😂😂😂
Yesss this. Ain’t even home 😂😂😂
I AM HOL-LER-RING 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣I NEED THIS COMMENT PINNED!!!!
THIS🤣🤣🤣💀💀💀
Why don't they get their own women to help them??... What is this conversation actually saying about how some males perceive their own women. Why are going outside of their own communities to seek help and support from black women??
I said this in another comment but I think this guy made his point wrong i'm from a blended community also in UK (south asian and black, a lot are here in the UK) and as kids we are told to seek out woc if we think we are in danger/being stalked. It totally goes both ways he didnt say it because hes probably from one of those communities but he doesnt know its not like that everywhere.
@@AK47_Aki I'm also from the UK. But, I'm not going to waste my energy on defending a community that does nothing for black women... Outside of lips service. I know because I live around them as well. I know how they operate.
RIGHT?! Is he also implying that Indian women aren't caring enough lol?!
@@AK47_Aki He did not say woc, he said black women. He should have said women from his race or white women. We are not your protectors. Have these asian men been castrated that they want women from a whole other race to protect them? Isn't it the job of the men to protect and help women? Why are you looking for protection from the least protected group of women in the world?
@@genevieveaniko6492 It isnt just one community and as I said I know they are not all like that.
If we don't have a personal bond, or you've never helped me don't look for me to help you. I am a bw who's quick to tell you to get the hell out my face. I don't care if I am your last hope!
EXACTLY!!!! Let em know. I’m right behind you boo
He's giving benevolent misogynoir.
Nobody needs the mammy trope to persist unless it is a cautionary historical case study that undoes the impact of racism relating to this issue.
He needs to stop that.
Benevolent misogynoir I never heard this term before but as soon as you said it I understood it. Thank you
@@albertamathurin7084 you're welcome 😊 Bell hooks coined misogynoir first
@@tylergood3773 yes I'm aware of that of that part
I burned my cape when my own brother betrayed me!!!!… helped him a lot & he bit the hand that fed him because he owed some money 💸.. I’m sick…
Same story for me. I burned my cape too. ❤❤
Proud of you 👏 👏. 💜
@@antoinettejohnson2188 THANKYOU 😇
@@bellefiori574 PROUD OF YOU!
@@cryptickink I'm proud of US! THANK YOU!❤❤
Yep this is our soft period. Were taking care of our lives and ourselves.
Yassssssssssss ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
These men are all panicking. They realize that we are pursuing healing, and they can't stand it. I'm going forward in my healing journey.
As black woman (from the UK) I don't take this as a compliment, I'm think we're tired of being a 'mammy' in whichever capacity!
I am not even black and can relate so hard. All over the planet women are just a resource for men....
It is only the BP who grow up in predominantly black countries…. They have blind spots to WS and r@yc!sm and a lot of the time they just don’t get it….. And the sad part is they pass along their “cluelessness” to their kids who may not have grown up in the same predominantly black space as them SMH
As a Black woman from the US, neither do I. I'm tired of people viewing Black women as strong mammies put on earth to take care of everyone.
And as a BW from France I'm tired of this too! It is so frustrating because it make me think of my Mom who doesn't get any help when needed but would not hesitate one second to help any strangers who need help. I always have to "yell" at her not to...
It’s insulting another way to use us.
I don't see how so many black women were fawning over this man 😕 and it just reveals how they feel about us what they know about us but look how they treat us 🤔 😂 it's laughable everyone wants a black women to build them up and when they do they are left in the lurch. Thanks for the compliment but we good we don't need your two cents he needs to go talk about how his people are treating their WOMEN
Exactly
I get what he's saying. But, it's ultimately not black women's job to always come to others' rescue. Especially when we are not truly supported and protected.
Full stop, NO.
While he may mean well, it's time to unpack that. Although im, personally, inherently kind and helpful, I'm not flattered in the least by these types of "shout outs" and "praises".
At some point, reciprocity of our abilities and care needs to be second nature.
Stated perfectly!
Correct is belebolent misogynistic at core .... It doesnt matter the color of the skin, is men thinking WOMEN NEED TO SAVE THEM, which this very dangerous narrative that women love to help, to edúcate, to save men .... No, i don't , cuz 99,9% of the type this is not reciprocated .... I seen it AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN, women doing the most to save evey single men around, making them better human beings, helping them in need, but if the woman is in need, they dont care, not their problem, they are busy, they dont have the time neither want to, cuz what are you going to give me in exchange.
MEN DONT DO ANYTHING FROM THE KIDNESS OF THEIR HEART, EVERYTHING IS TRANSACTIONAL, and if men help women, believe me, the want US to pay them with our bodies, cuz in their mind You gain anything from helping someone...men are selfish by Nature but they want all the women of the world to coddle them like little kids ... no, i'm tired !
Any non-black person, especially women, has NO RIGHT telling us how to feel about this. It's best to be quiet, sit back, and listen if you really care, but you don't & that's part of the issue!
The unmitigated gall to attempt to call us bitter, argumentative, and ungrateful for feeling how we feel. You are not a black woman. Check yourself & let black women speak. Whether we accept it or not, it's not YOUR place. It's not about YOU. How dare you! That's a lot of yalls problem now! SMH
Thank you for saying this💯💯
Yeah. I saw the cave-dweller who posted this with hashtags like #racism #ally and all that other nonsense. She had the nerve to tell us we should be grateful that this man appreciates us. As if some asian calling me the help adds value to my life.
The Second Lady in the light blue hoodie I HIGHLY agree with. Now to any non-black person who genuinely thanks black people and gives us credit for what we are great at, that’s different. That Indian man was in a time of need and I think it was sweet of him thanking the black community. But then there’s a majority of people who like she said: see us as black labor. You see: non-black people KNOWS the value/how dope black people are. The more you learn about history and whatnot, you will see often that we are the blueprint. Especially when it came to the establishment of America. And to this day: non-blacks will still go to the black person for labor, help, creative ideas etc etc and I can’t f*** with that. I even have to check myself when I’m TOO available/too helpful (sucks when you have a big heart). But to anyone who reads this comment: please do not exclusively look for black people to save you. Not all of us are built the same way and anyone can help you (based on your intuition on who to trust). Only look for black people when that’s your only option and you’re just desperate. Not as a way to become “saved” because we are no longer your emotional blanket and nurturer. With all due respect: Let it Go🗣️🙅🏾♀️
When i first saw the video I kinda felt admired by it.
But then I realized the pain we go thru from giving so much..
And I also looked at his IG and his girlfriend was white....
I was like yup...we are helpers and slaves to him. No thanks
Idk know this dude but I'm hoping he's not one of those Indian dudes that hates their own Indian women.
@@klaudinegarcia8932 welp you can hope but reality is he most likely is😂😂😂. I can assure in time of danger he'll protect his yt gf but let a bw be the clean up
We should never get overly invested in people outside of ourselves because their "compliments" may not be genuine and for the mere fact that his gf is less melanated, his compliment could have been kept to himself. At that point it's pandering to get engagement and more money
His gf is white….yeah I’m checked out. Black men do this too. Uplift us for our labor don’t see the worth in making us actual wife’s, and genuine partners.
Right?
Like our place in society is to be available to serve everyone else, anytime...
anywhere...
anyone...
Why's that obligation JUST ON US????
And why don't we receive any of this in return?
We really have given too much over the generations to the point we're taken for granted by everybody and something, not even someone, but something to be used.
You can always come to a black woman for help no lie. That’s why black men take advantage
I’m always helping random ppl
My mama always helps people, strangers, family & friends. She’s a great woman ❤
I wonder how his mom would feel if he married a black woman?
@vizeas EXACTLY! They would most likely be foaming at the mouth, vomiting, & hyperventilating.
Most don’t approve it’s taboo, RARELY happens. I’m surprised he even said that from experience they don’t like us and stereotype so I’m very surprised he said that
Too many Indian mamas are color-ist so they'll actually overlook her background if she's light-skinned. For Middle-eastern and North Africans, both patriarchal, they often (reluctantly) accept Black women but they don't want their daughters marrying Black men.
That part! We are the magical negroes but not worthy of anything but servitude
Aah. This. Yup...
I think he meant it as a nice sentiment but it’s a dangerous sentiment because I no longer am ready to be nice to non-black women. Based off of how we are always so caring as black women but a small group of people stick their necks out for us when we need help. Kindness is not given back to us and the cup is running empty.
Exactly
Yes he should have pointed out it goes both ways
I remember seeing the guy's vid a couple of days ago and I started shaking my head while he was talking. I appreciate him trying to show love and appreciation but don't look to me for that. Especially from highly colorist and racist communities. Although it comes naturally for us to help, I'm waiting for the love and care to START being reciprocated. Until then, I'm joining the other women and centering only me and mine in this messed up world.
Nah!! Get somebody else to do it!! We're tired!! Also, how many of these men get threatened to be disowned by their families if they seek romantic relationships with us?
It’s NOT a compliment! Black women need to start helping/aiding other black women and ourselves!
Exactly!
The #1 thing we need to do is help ourselves, practice self-preservation (preserve our resources of all kinds for ourselves, and encourage one another to do the same.
We have been a great resource to others because we are very resourceful people - all we need to do is stop giving to others and pour all those resources into ourselves.
I’m doing my best to look at my life from a very objective standpoint before I do anything - am I well-rested? No? Then don’t give. Am I financially secure & relieved myself of all financial stress? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great physical condition? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great mental condition? No? Then don’t give. Am I in great spiritual condition? No? Then don’t give.
We haven’t had generational wealth and peace and protection. Those of us who want a better quality of life are going to do best by very rarely giving of ourselves in any selfless ways. If it’s reciprocal, ofc invest in your community/your own connection & protection & validation. If not, say no. Get used to saying no.
I’m a human being first. I’m a woman, second. I’m black, third. I’m not God, not a man, I’m not a mammy. I’m me & my full time job is taking care of myself in every which way I can ❤️🩹
Black women are seen as the help … no wonder why we are the most disrespected and yet everyone can come to us for help? It’s not adding up babes
At first I was like ok appreciation. Not at all. If you find this black woman leave me alone especially if you're looking for a cape. My love and help is reserved for children not adults who create their own storms.
I’ve always dated outside my race, every time I would date these men would literally say to me. Oh my gosh you are amazing, you help me so much, my exes were so lazy. They didn’t do anything. You go above and beyond. But they never really took care of me like they took care of their exes. I don’t like this look for black women we’re not mules we’re not servants and we need to burn the cape for everybody. I was not good enough for them to spend money on me provide for me and treat me like a queen. Just there to help and be their cheerleader. But I also noticed that black women help other races of people before they will help another black woman.
This is why I am the way I am and so protective of other black women and others that are directly related to me are my only concern .
No lies told
This is why I’ve been selfish all my life. I know it rubs my man and friends and family the wrong way but I’ve never not put me first. My parents constantly put me on a pedestal and I never jumped off it 💅🏾
@@CandieP put yourself first. As a woman you can never go wrong with that, with that being said don't be too selfish cuz you look up one day and find yourself by yourself and no one cares to be bother with you.
@@CandieP yessss love it. As you should love and don’t you ever get off of it either ❤️❤️❤️
Black people in general are lovely, it's just sad that people think black people are subservient because we're powerful ❤also we're not helpers because we're black, there are some black women who don't give a damn and they're not wrong for not wanting to 'build and save '❤
4:18 my sentiments exactly; and if you're anywhere in the world... protect black women
I’m not a fan of this!! He may have meant well, but it gives the impression that we’re the mammies of the world. Coming off like we’re help mates!! A lot of men who date out, always state we’re strong, down to earth and more low maintenance, hard working and sting . This to me is not really a compliment.
The reality is non blacks see us as the help. Nothing more and nothing less.
It’s sad that some black people think that this is a compliment. It is not.
However, this is the truth, we are helpful, kind and empathetic. This kindness has been abused and I think should be withdrawn entirely.
When non blacks ask me for help I either ignore them tell them ‘I am not the help’.
Certain stereotypes should not be perpetuated and won’t be for me.
Peace ✌🏾
*from
U don't have to say u are not the "help" u can still decline politely or say u are sorry u don't know etc
@@Nature-ep5cu I’m going to say what I want, when I want, to whom I want. ✌🏾
@@MiscellaneousMeMeright say what you feel comfortable and want. You’re entitled to that not what people tell you to say 😒🙄. I would’ve said the same thing
@@MiscellaneousMeMe yes Miss agreesive do u.
"My mom wasn't a pick me. She only had female friends." What does one have to do with the other?
They are always lurking in our spaces stealing our talking points .
@@patriciahercules6852
They really are and I’m sick of it
I'm tired of giving grace and it's not being returned. You're on your own until I see people respecting black women.
Being heralded as "THE HELP" is NOT a compliment. It's one thing to tell people "Black women are kind and helpful" but it's quite another thing to tell people "to go ask Black women for help when they need it." The latter creates a sense of entitlement on the part of those who need help and most importantly, creates a burden/responsibility on the part of Black women (which is essentially free labor - sound familiar?) None of this provides help FOR or TO Black women - this service is only one way. So again, we're burdened yet ignored as women. How much you wanna bet his mother didn't tell him to go out in the 🌎 and find a Black woman to marry?
If his mom was talking about Black women helping kids needing help, she's not wrong, but the problem is that nobody returns the favor.
This is true especially Asian and white people they will not help at all they pretend they don’t see anything other races are not helping no one let alone their own
This is a true story. I have several white friends and they have all told me they were told this as young girls.
Wow ok
Smh
I low key think it was an agenda to it along the lines of “get more blk women harmed”! Just MY thoughts
Not we the help le sigh 😮💨
@@Priscilla_BoyeMay I ask why some of my comments are being deleted ❓❓
Notice the message is find a black woman for help not find a black women to marry/provide/protect/treat well. Find a black woman to use. That’s the message. No thank you.
Also, notice when u ask Black Women who we should go to when we need help they say other Black Women. So we are expected to help EVERYONE else but we are only expected to get help just from each other? Do u hear yourself?🤔
What a backhanded compliment. And the mother didn’t say anything about him helping them in return. Such a selfish mindset just scanning the world for people they can use. Nothing was mentioned about what he could give back in return
This never occurred to me, but I’ve never turned down someone in need.
I can say that black folks GIVE and donate without being noticed and they give consistently to their church, their fam, and their neighbor unless crossed.
In my neighborhood, I’m the only woman of color (mixed) and the only one who shares food from the garden and there are 12 gardeners in my street.
I strongly agree with the woman named Jade. She was on point.
This is why I ALWAYS MIND MY BLACK WOMAN BUSINESS! Family, friends, significant other. It don’t matter. I put myself first regardless. Sorry not sorry. The more I have came to the rescue for others the more it was unappreciated.
Notice how nobody mentions going to black MEN for help. 🤔🤔🤔
Poor guy tried to do something nice and it back fired. I get what he was trying to say, but unfortunately it makes it sound you can always tread on a Black women when you need something. Use them they like it. It's the same as the Black Partner affect. If you want to look better get a black girlfriend or wife.
My grandmother's have always taught us to make enough food for leftovers because you never know who might be hungry. They were that type of women, but I realized the world loves to use us. Use us any way they can and then act like they don't know us once they get their come up or find someone else. But I appreciate that he appreciates us.
I agree. And most of the people and children I have help have been other black people. I am that type of black woman. I like that about myself, and nobody can make me change that.
This sentiment is only positive when it's reciprocal. Black women are not the physical manifestation of the giving tree. We are not here to work endlessly for others with no return.
This
Well I'm going to be honest with you...BW have been used and abused by BM for so long (people see and KNOW what's going on) that they just assume that BW are okay with it... we're really the only group of women that are going around calling our biological male counterparts "kings" but those kings haven't built anything for US...BW have given BM EVERYTHING and required NOTHING in return so people just assume based on that ALONE that BW are okay with being used...ditch BM and start focusing on our sisterhood and that WILL change...but I know MOST BW won't do that 🤷♀️
Ladies, he just verbalized what the world thinks of us. We’re the help in societies eye. I’m into the soft life I need to hire help not be THE HELP.
No. Was he advised to marry black women? Or have have their backs... probably not. We are not here to be of servitude to others.
Lol of course not no one wants to be linked with black women they just look to use you especially the male version of us
Whew! Do you hear that bw? Sysbw. Uplift yourselves. Everyone else is benefiting from us but us.
Btw, he was reacting to shytngigs video here. He wasn’t just talking about his experience with black women but also the whole situation regarding how people disrespect black women when they are the most caring people.
I meant,This was not the full story, I agreed
I watched the full vid there clips miss out.
Dear black woman,
Pour your greatness into yourself. You have done more than enough for the world. You deserve to live your best life❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Yup!
His commentary came across as use a black woman as a stepping stone.
I'm done rescuing people who would never rescue me. This especially goes for black males also
While it's true that black women shine with an inner light... but we're not super women and we're not mules.
I get what he is saying, minorities get it, especially black ppl we understand, blk women are considerate to others, but yah like he pointed out blk women are not protected so we not doing that ish no more. Ppl got us F up in the worst way. We taking care of ourselves after what been conveyed for years now. So no take care of yourself.
I will always do my best to help a child in need, but other than that I burnt my cape. Fight your own battles I am not your mammy. If you can’t revere and pour love on me in times of peace and happiness please do not expect me to fight for you or your cause in times of pain. I will quietly support your at my home while I rest in my femininity while you fight your own battles
Maybe that’s why ppl hate me bc I act helpless af. I can’t pick up ish, can’t go nowhere, can’t do any favors. Lmao, heck no mf. You help me with some ish 😂😊
I've heard that sentiment before, it's the same vibes as "stronge black woman" a back handed compliment. It also leans on the Mammy sterotype.
Apparently BW are only good for saving others and supporting others, not good enough to love, not good enough to spoil.
As a black woman, get somebody else to do it!
Leave us ALONE! How come every time people want to go viral they invoke the black woman. 1:53 The question is: did his mother ever teach him to PROTECT BLACK WOMEN or only to use black women for HIS protection. Please don't come find me. Everyone only wants to take from black women. 😢😢
I'm in my healing and "No" season. No to any fools, and I will take the time necessary to heal. I'm not going to let anybody, family or otherwise, push me into distractions. No! I'm not Harriet Tubman and the Underground Railroad for fools.
3:02 (white lady here for context) thoughts before the video because engagement is queen. It seems flattering at first like 'aw they feel safe' but it also feels like transferring work from where it should - for example instead of approaching an employee at the counter of a nearby store. Also a skintone doesn't determine someones personality, there are plenty of horrible people with various melanin levels. Women of colour also don't need the hassle a parent/employee looking for a misplaced child to find them and start making (racist) assumptions about how they came to be in possession of said child
Wrong , it’s not about Racism , ITS ABOUT EVERYTHING!
@@cryptickinkgirl yes !
@@cryptickinkit’s everything
This is not a compliment 😒. Leave us black women alone.
I didn't take what he said as a compliment, because his mother didn't mean it as one. Leave us alone.
Don't come looking for me bc these are the same ppl who don't want black women to get a promotion or a raise even though you've had a help every Karen and Becky in the office complete their projects but they remember to thank you publicly when they get a big ole bonus on that same project.
Imo his mom’s observation isn’t the issue, because a lot of times this is true. The problem is the lack of reciprocity. If so many people think that we would help and support them, they should do the same for us.
That is NOT flattering to me. I’m tired of black women being used. We’re officially “The Help” to other people. Nah, don’t look for me.
That sounds great and all, and this man seems genuine (but who really knows). It goes to show people know the strength and love of bw, but it's been a constant run to bw for help, but lack of help to bw.
The amount of bashing bw untul they are needed is ridiculous
Lmao he said my mom wasnt a pick me... this isnt anything new. People have always known to turn to us for help or to be saved. I second what the second woman said, look for us to spoil because we deserve it the most and yet too many of us receive it the least.
Black women STOP helping others and focus on our sisterhood
That's what I keep saying but MOST BW are uninterested and it's mainly because BW are in competition with each other and can't stand each other... it's really sad that we are all we truly have and we do more for others who HATE us, and BM are leading the charge with that hate...I'm honestly just tired of everyone and that's slowly but surely including BW as well and their worship of their BIGGEST predator---BM...
Hayi, Im not here to save the world,Jesus has already done that. Bw have hung up the cape.
Amen!
Another example of how we, as Black women, are seen . Yes, leave us alone
You know what, With all the anti black, anti black women, anti WOMEN that I see DAILY it was nice and he was talking about HIS experience and saying Thank You. And it our natured to wanted to help, Yes lot more people should be willing help, that what I got ☺️
It's funny how this is what they're being taught at home but when we're being unfairly dragged through the mud they spectate silently.
This.
When there was the luxury Black girl movements (as much as I agree with the criticism of capitalism and classism etc) we all witnessed everyone being bitter and mad at us for spoiling ourselves since no one was gonna do it for us. And you are telling me these are the same people who try to humble Black women, who all declare how they will turn to us in need of help like we are their Lord and Saviour? But won't devote themselves to our well being? Interesting. This is the same relationship people have with God, they blame Him for anything wrong but when they need help, they crawl to Him then become entitled, ungrateful and arrogant.
Respectfully nah. If you see a black woman offer to help her. Give her a space to feel safe.
Its basically the same as the "black girlfriend effect" (that trend was very problematic) but as a caretaker.
It's the black WIFE effect, and how was that trend problematic? 🧐
@@mariabrown6926 By reforcing steryotypes about how black people dress and such. Like imagine if the trend was the "native american wife" effect, and all of the sudden the dude started using headdresses and paintings etc. Its just steryotypes.
The "Black Wife effect" was literally just showing how happy & put together the men look AFTER marrying a BW... That's it.
Is it problematic because it's a black woman with a white man...👀
@@mariabrown6926People as a whole will expect bw to do for them but aren’t pouring anything into bw. Not anything wrong with those individuals who have a great marriage but the message it sends to majority that don’t really care unless we benefit them.
@@MutedMinimalistThat’s their wives, not just anyone. The key word there was wife. In this case, it was for a random person.
I think, in general, it is look for any woman and due to the societal standards of beauty, if you do not measure up to that standard, you are put into a category of a work horse. Usually the dumpy, overweight, older women in my culture are the ones that people tend to gravitate towards in order to use. From family to society. I've seen this my entire life. We are seen as non-human, no feelings and given very little respect in general from just about everyone. I have even had people approach me and aggressively ask me for help and if I say, NO, I get verbally bashed. A couple of examples in my own life: my family insisted that I bring my alcoholic brother into my home, regardless of how hard I worked to build my life and no matter how many things I was involved in with my old church I used to attend, I was the "go to" whenever something new came up and they needed volunteers. I had to actually semi isolate myself to get away from the constant bombardment.
This was an excellent topic 👍🏾👏🏽❤️
Thanks
BW can’t even run to BW but everyone else can.
He was just trying to go viral and he did
We ARE NOT "The Help" !!
These folks see us as nothing more than the help. It is not a compliment. They don't see us as equals or romantic partners or friends. We are simply the help.
I’m fine with what he said. For children.. grown men and women need to stop.
The problem is that children grow up and still keep those ideas.
Yes I think thats the part a lot of people are missing children asking for help is a lot different than adults
So in other words, use black women. Hell no.
The only other people I’m protective of is black women and people that are directly related to me. I know we don’t always take care of each other sometimes but I be damn if I let someone else play in our face in any capacity. F that!!!