the hazards of living alone | o̶v̶e̶r̶sharing in seattle
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- Опубліковано 11 лип 2024
- oversharing in seattle makes its springtime appearance! and in this one i'm experiencing relapse apprehension while depriving myself of media and pursuing creative distraction! and receive a huge gift from a mysterious source! with a display of the ethic of reciprocity!
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0:00 - sexy ahh opening
0:29 - something so good just happened to me
2:50 - i had a really sh*tty night last night
4:02 - feeling disappointed in myself
5:28 - seattle supporting me
7:09 - relapse apprehension
8:47 - seattle in february
9:32 - the hazards of living alone
10:57 - depriving myself of media
she/her.
BUSINESS INQUIRIES: katherout@gmail.com - Навчання та стиль
I have paid a lot for therapy to discover I'm not supposed to live alone! I'm shouting in all caps! Our species is a social one! There are people who are happier alone and we talk about destigmatizing that a lot and rightfully so. But destigmatizing "needing" to have other people around to function better is sooo important too. It's not a weakness, it's just human! Oh and the answer is not necessarily a romantic relationship, but community! That's the wisdom I can offer after spending time, energy and money to find out.
a banger of a comment
It’s amazing how little acts of kindness can make such a huge positive difference in peoples’ lives. Really is heartwarming to see.
After living alone in Seattle this past year, I’m excited to move in with a friend and prioritize community more! I really love “hosting” and creating a space for people to gather. I’m more inspired to do that now!
hosting is the best i'd love to have more space to do so
September makes me the most nervous. My adoptive mom passed away in September of 2011, and ever since then, the sun and the skies and the trees and the air and EVERYTHING about September is just this potent breath of grief and beauty and pain and enlightenment and Spirit punching me in the gut. It's intense. I fear it and revel in it every time it comes around. She passed away on the most beautiful day ever and I love that about the month so much, but being reminded of the loss and pressure I experienced by nature and the way the air smells literally everyday is so intense. I get through it obviously, we all do, but damn. I get the month scaries feels.
oof grief anniversaries can shift the entire tone of a time. you put it perfectly
When I was in college I lived with 6 other people and i made so many happy memories. When I graduated and went to live in NYC, I decided I had to live with roommates. I ended up with 2 other roommates and we're on our second year of living together. It was fine at first, but now I basically never see them and we've drifted apart. I now have neither the benefits of companionship nor complete control over my living space. I'm looking to live on my own this year, since living alone is better than roommates you never see. At least in my single I can adopt a cat
i really want an intentional communal living space!! i hear u
Agree with this - living alone is one of the best decisions I've ever made and I knew it was right for me even when others like my sister told me it wasn't. I experience seasonal depression and anxiety and I have dyspraxia. It is still so right for me and I love it :) Wishing you the best - put your coping mechanisms in and you'll be grand - I have cat envy!
on your take on living alone - I don’t need to always feel connected I think it’s your extrovert tbh. I can be more myself when I’m alone and I crave that more than company a lot of the time. I would rather the option to be alone than have to live with people. and sometimes I do choose to not engage with media while eating its a good way to practice focusing on mindfulness
Hey, see my comment at the top - I'm an extrovert and have always loved living alone as extroverts still need some quiet/come down time, especially when they are neurodivergent. I agree with your comment about mindfulness and being comfortable in your own company :)
Your channel reminds me that it’s normal to feel scared, frustrated, and struggle internally, but that help and possibilities for improvement exist. I’m motivated to continue pursuing my desires after every episode. You got this Kath!
One thing I want to create this month is a new collage art piece I began but haven’t finished (yet).
i'm so glad i can remind you of that!
I always love your extrovert pov because I would love to eat and live alone. As an introvert with a husband and 2 daughters I’m like “wtf, can’t I just eat in peace?” What I’d give for a few silent meals.
HAHAHAHHAHAHA the yin and yang of it all
The commune would be proud
I prefer to live alone. Being comfortable with oneself, without the need for constant interaction with others, leads to inner peace.
perfect Sunday morning video to gear up for the revvy 😎
Hello Katherine!! Happy Sunday to you!!
Living alone has its pros and cons, especially during hard times it could be stressful.
This was a good video!!
I love to hear your perspectives on life as an extrovert because as an introvert, I loved when I lived alone 😂
It's such a gripping & touching sensation to watch your videos & hear something that resonates so deeply! I agree it's important to reflect on how you consume & create! And the laundry room anecdote inspires me to create warm relations with my new neighbors when I move next month.
One piece I'm trying to create this month is a riff on the emotional wheel, which displays a range of "feeling" words, but this will be selective to emotions that come up when foraging. The title is "mushy feelings: the emotions of foraging." I already did a rough sketch, now I need to finish the hard copy & decide on colors if I so please. Then I will mail it to my internet friend who also forages fungi :~)
that sounds great! Alexithymia could be something you could look into for emotion words, there’s a whole wheel dedicated to it
@@bcpersonalprofessional687 hey! I'm curious about this connection you're making. do you mean there's a separate emotions wheel for people who struggle to indentify emotions? when I looked it up -- the regular emotions wheel comes up & there was one wheel with 7 traits of alexithymia. I'm interested in how these traits would fit in with foraging...
OMFGGGGG YOu"RE SO COOL FOR THIS
I just can't tell you how much I love to listen to your mindfull thoughts. Barely any person in my (near) environment has brought up such ideas and thoughts.
Since I want to emigrate to an English speaking country in the near future (after I will have finished my M.A. studies in Eduactional Pedagogy/Psychology), I would be more than happy, to have a coffee or tea with you (if it's gonna be the US :D), talking and reflecting about life, completely honest, because there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of and so much to be grateful for, even if it's just the "little" things in life.
Thank you so much for being YOU and sharing this with us, Kath! Love you so much for this! Greetings from Regensburg in Germany ♥
Long live the revi! 😍😂
Also, huzzah for letting folks know about joyful impacts. May the joy spread and multiply!
Hmm, and media deprivation... I've been intending to do that in certain physical spaces (and not yet convinced myself to do so) and/or times... maybe it's time to get on that.
Happy Sunday. I’m a new viewer. I’m watching this as I’m laying in bed & trying to heal because I’m in my healing era. This summer & literally the whole 2023,I’ve been rebuilding my life after a messy late 2022.
WELCOMEEEE glad to have u!! proud of you for prioritizing your healing
I never lived alone. I don't think I can. After I moved out of my student dorm, I moved in a coliving space. So much fun, big community. Always people to socialize and hang out without needing to leave home. We cook together, shop together, eat together, watch movies and stuff.
this video is beautifully done :)
My husband and I were just talking about how supportive Seattle feels the other day - unlike any place we've been. It just feels like we're part of a community and how beautiful is that
UGH BEE i'm so glad you share that feeling!
Thanks for this video, Katherine. Deeply thoughtful as always. I will need to reflect on your thoughts around media consumption as distraction. As obvious as that seems, I admit I don’t often think in those terms. But I think the frame generally fits.
I also had not thought about associating negative feelings with certain months. At least not in a long while. But now that you mention it - having been in the corporate world 30+ years, I suppose I might have some apprehension around early January, after vacation time is all used up (use it or lose it!). And in the new year, management is typically “raring to go” on ambitious targets, projects, overhauls, damn the torpedoes, etc. In truth, January has not reliably followed that pattern, in my experience. But in any given year, it might - and depending on circumstances, it could be an abrupt and jarring shift. Hence the apprehension.
januaryism is a real thing to be apprehensive about
Living alone doesn't have to mean being alone. Seek and fully immerse yourself into the opportunities around each of us and the rest will follow.
I also live alone in Seattle, and I think what has made it enjoyable for me is having set evening plans a few times a week-a couple weekly audio chats with friends from home and a board game night at my boyfriends house all on the same days/times every week. at a minimum I know there’s 3 dinners I won’t eat alone, and there’s always the potential to make more plans or have people over! I truly think without this living alone would be so hard…I lived with a roommate I wasn’t super close with in COVID and used to call my mom every day because the isolation of eating every meal alone was so daunting for me.
also-January is the toughest month for me too. I am trying to make a point to make some special plans (a concert, a weekend trip, etc) every January so I can look forward to that month and not dread it :-)
yes these repetitive plans are what i lovvvvve when i have them
My "nervous months" are June-September. Just because I live in the deep south and it is oppressively hot and humid, particularly during these months. It doesn't also help that I'm on medication that gives me hot flashes 😂. So, it's nothing mental, more environmental....if that makes sense. I stan fall and winter
August makes me the most nervous as there always tends to be a lull in my life at the point. Generally it’s pre-exam season where i’m from (🇿🇦) so everybody is generally unavailable and communication becomes difficult as everyone is on their own grind time so socially it feels very isolating and only towards early/mid december do things get better when the holidays come around. so August to me always kickstarts a period of largely uninterrupted social isolation and it’s not that i struggle to be alone but i love experiencing my friendships to the fullest extent so much so it’s just tough to bare that time.
Thank you for sharing! Your thoughts are so introspective and relatable as someone who also recently started living alone. As a result of living alone, I’ve found myself inspired to create more so this month I’m hoping to attempt to create some type of music from this feeling. I’ve never made music before but we’ll try lol
omfg i just wrote my first song we can do this...
Yes! I am so much more productive, creative and free living alone personally. Noone to work around haha
There are worse things than being or living alone! Being ok on your own can be very revealing and healing…. FYI,I live in Edmonds and love living in this beautiful city.
June makes me nervous - I’ll be graduating college and there’s a lot of unknowns regarding my future career and life.
I would say December is a month that puts me in a really weird mood. Like, I'm glad it's Christmas, but sometimes it can be overwhelming with constant happiness.
Please share the songs in this, I loved them!
Interesting perspective.
I live alone and have quite a different experience, I don't rely on media (other than to drown my neighbours kids out which I'd do if I lived in shared haha). I always hated living in shared if I wasn't already good friends/partner of the person and that is due to dyspraxia, anxiety, and just who I am. I'm an extrovert so living alone suits me perfect as coming home is my 'come down' time - I basically go out and socialise daily and I speak to people about their wellbeing etc on the phone for work.
I enjoy watching things while I eat and agree it is harder to eat alone because I find it boring at least half the time - but I meditate daily and this has helped me be able to do things in silence and mindfully more often like eat alone. I find laundry and dishes so boring, repetitive and time consuming though, and music is one of my biggest hobbies, I sing along and dance so find it really healthy. I don't make time for inside/solo hobbies other than watching these videos and listening to music in the background or reading before bed, so am glad that doing this in the background allows me to enjoy the hobbies and it makes me happier and my life living alone more interesting.
So... we're on the same figurative wave rn, and it's wild bc I'm across the water from Seattle haha
I used to film and create videos and post them on youtube, but idk somewhere along the way my inspiration for all of it. But finding this video reminded me why I love to make stories-- it's because I try to make each video feel like a movie. Anyway, I'm grateful to have seen this! Twice, now. Hahaha
i think a lot of this boils down to the fact that humans have lived in communities for the majority of our history and that living alone is a very recent development and we're in no way adapted to it. we need other people, to be in community, and to be social. our health literally depends on it.
YUPPPPPPP
I'm between jobs so I've got a lot of time on my hands right now - I'm planning out a bunch of zines that I want to make!
LUVVVVV zines i wanna make one too!!!!
I also felt supported when I had my wallet returned to my apartment in Seattle by a cyclist . And that laundry room display definitely seem like something you’d only find in Seattle / portland haha. I miss that, but at the same time I do appreciate the slower pace of my new home city. I also got a roommate a couple weeks ago and time will tell if it is helping with the mental health or not. P.s. watercolouring is my favourite !
YESSSS watercoloring :')
thanks for sharing :) you're so cool
june because I went through an awful depressive episode and breakup a year ago in june. Hoping to focus more on celebrating my queer self and less on being alone this june
LOVE ITTTTT
Good question.
I love your basement fairy godmother, too! How special!
I think audio messages ar an underrated way to connect. They're way more common in latino culture and I love them
when i lived in china that was how evvvvvverybody communicated even for 2 second texts. i am a big audio message gal with my long distance friends
Ok I am sitting alone, eating my eggplant parmesan pasta for dinner, watching this youtube video right now. At this very moment 12:06 I'm kinda freaking out now.....are you some kind of psychic fortune teller knowing I would do this? @Katherout how did you foresee this!?!? 😅
I think for me, the most difficult months are July, August and September. At least they were in the last three years. It's because there were so many changes during those months and I didn't know how my life would continue. The biggest struggles I had were after my graduation from german highschool last year and now my volunteer year ends and the new chapter of going to university begins. Paired with the lonlyness I felt after the pandemic was over, I'm not really trusting my resiliance anymore. So during this time, it's a day to day struggle, but I stick to the tiniest bits of hope. I believe that life will get easier
watching this after watching all of the revilatorium vids is the perfect way to have spent the weekend tbh 🫡💕
Hi! Where are your glasses from? Super cute :)
I dunno if I have a specific month I feel anxious in because I’m kinda symptomatic all thruout the year for anxiety and depression but right now, in May, I’m a lil anxious, which I haven’t felt before. I think its because I’ve learned so much from all the bumps I went through these past few months this year in college and despite the ups and downs I’m in a truly amazing state of mind! I have so many creative ideas I want to try out, one of them being getting back into DSLR photography by organizing a plan to take photos of the WHOLE college campus I commute to and being able to make cards, posters, stickers and so on for an annual maker’s market from none other than APIDA (Asian PACIFIc Islander Desi American). This semester is pretty much over, and I have two finals to take, and I just want to make the most out of my time and energy and talent in the next three months before going back to school in the Fall (Yes, I have a THREE MONTH summer) I’m anxious because I want things to be perfect, and even though I’ve gotten a lot better at working with my body over my schedule this year, I have a fear that it’ll all crash and burn in front of me. Scholarships and/or working a job, applying to jobs, finishing a book every two weeks, taking classes in person and online, and making time for friends so we can get closer is hard but it’s also something I’ve made myself get good at: managing various things simaltaneously. And there’s also volunteering I want to do 1-2x a month at minimum to get more exposure to environmental jobs I might be interested in. So, I want to juggle career exploration, creative projects, reading books, learning a foreign lang., getting better at piano, creative classes, and earning money in the next three months. Or at least two. This is something I’v never done before but I am looking forward to it
loved this reflection
your channel single-handedly has me questioning my life-long assumption that I am an introvert …
and let’s dig in….
Something about August feels so dreadful. Maybe it's school starting again and I'll be reentering academia at the end of this summer but something about August feels like this downhill slide into fall and I love fall I'm an early October libra but something about August just feels like such a jarring transition from the freedom summer has even when I'm working and not living the way I did when I was a teenager. August is also so harsh weather wise too, at least in the Midwest that I wonder if that has to do with it as well. Something about the corridor from May to August just can bring a weird underlying dread.
i toooootally hear you august can feel like an ending in a lot of ways
My heartrate is really high too. I think it's because of my psych medication.
I always share. Just don’t give yourself away. If you already did? It happened 🤷♂️ Just keep looking up. :)
Awesome post.
-Kaiser Jaeger
i've been saying this for soooo long. how is it the ideal, for a single adult + working person, to be living alone?! how has that become the goal to strive for? definitely not healthy for you mental health wise.
bingo
Hello Katherine. Having watched your political awakening video, does our system require a revolution, which are inherently destructive, or evolution with gradual systemic change?
honestly, my birthday month (November) makes me the most nervous because I build up a lot of dread toward it: I'm working on it, but I feel like I get my expectations too high for what the month will bring and end up feeling very lonely when my birthday actually rolls around
edit: and to your second question! I really wanna write more + get more into video editing/photography, like I've filmed so many clips on my phone that it's no longer backing up, and the film camera I recently bought has run out of film lol. so i feel like those are as good a sign to start as any.
yes holidays/birthdays have such high expectations that can be hard to reject!
I am visiting Seattle for a work trip, and excited to explore more of this pretty city! Got any suggestions? Also, the one thing I want to create this month is more visual diaries of my new changes, experiences, and adventures I go on in the month of May!
I'm from Atlanta too. Curious to hear your comparisons about the two cities.
been wanting to create a podcast that's essentially short encouraging voice memos!
CUTE DO IT!!!!!
Re: "what do you want to create" - I'm working on a longform video that certainly won't be done this month, but I'd like to just make a healthy amount of progress in May. Maybe I'll hit the like 3/4 of the way done point?
YUHHHHHHHHHH let's see it
What does “like and subscribe if you have good politics” mean?
to like and subscribe if you have good politics
Like all radicals, the only good politics are her politics. Any disagreement and you are Hitler. I’m really sorry to see her tumble down this rabbit hole.
I've been going out to Rheinhaus and Havana every weekend trying to find a new girlfriend.
May I suggest getting a dog :)
Helluva' Woman.
what's been tickling me is song writing, approaching people who do, knowing i used to, we can, trying not to get too in my head about evasive timelines and perceived distances 🪟🌳🐛