Show this to your partner if you have ROCD!
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- Опубліковано 7 кві 2021
- Helping you get to Lifetime Recovery from any OCD subset so you can live a happy life with healthy, thriving relationships!
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The confessing part is definitely me… I feel the need to tell my partner EVERYTHING even if it’s unnecessary
Yes, stop this and accept uncertainty!
it's almost like logging so at least someone hears it. I dump it on them so we can share and pick my brain. It feels almost obsessive
This was very helpful for me. I have a girlfriend with ROCD who I love to death, and this helped me realized what I was doing wrong, and it helped me understand what I can do better. Thank you so much!
I’m in a loving relationship for almost 3yrs and Ive gone through this pretty much the entire duration of the relationship. When my anxiety and rumination hits it peak and then breaks it’s the biggest relief. I hope one day I can overcome this and enjoy what I have
You absolutely can! Consider jointing The Path which will teach you everything you need to know to recover from relationship OCD.
myocdcoach.teachable.com/p/path
How are you now?
I've just recently figured out that a lot of the feelings I've had my entire life are OCD, and hearing that it's possible to get better is so helpful
Yep, same here, looking back. Lifetime recovery is possible!!
I cried listening to this. I finally understand what is wrong with me.
I'm glad it helped! See recovery details in the description!
Me too i keep questioning if i can trust my partner that hes out of love with me ect. No matter how much he helps me nothing helps
My girlfriend of 4 years has ROCD. She questions me daily, constantly about every little thing I do. It is exhausting. There is nothing more frustrating than telling the truth and the person you love telling you that they don’t believe you. ROCD is ruining our relationship and I don’t know what to do. Thank you for this video, it does give me some hope and insight.
I'm so sorry you're struggling with this, both of you! It's so hard, I've been there. It CAN get SO MUCH better with treatment. I am launching a new course called Support Your Loved One w/ OCD very soon. Are you on my email list? If not, join for recovery tips and announcements at www.MyOCDCoach.com. The course will be listed there soon!!!
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What should i do i am same for someone he loves me a lot but i cant trust him from last 1 year i have done very wrong with him due to ROCD i bit him even doubting on him i dont let him go anywhere 😢😢😢 what should i do i am too much depressed
Rumination has me in tears most often but I'm coping with it for the last 6 months in a really good way🥺 And thank youuuu for this❤️❤️❤️
You're welcome!
Thank you , I confess constantly , I am working on it it’s a tough battle
I destroyed many potential romantic relationships in the past because of this. Thanks for this video and the time and effort you put into making them.
You are welcome:)
I’ve never felt so understood more than I do now.. thank you.
You’re welcome!!
thanks
Glad it helped!
Happy July 3rd ,2023🎉 You are an amazing answer from Heaven Ty 💖🙏🏻🌻 XOXO 😘
Awww...thanks! It's my pleasure, helping others feel better and recover is very rewarding and I love seeing so many people gain happiness in life and relationships:) Happy 4th of July!!
thank you, you explained it perfectly. i'm in a relationship with a partner with rocd and it has been challenging. we argue almost everyday because of intrusive thoughts and the reassurances are really tiring. i'm going to be more patient with him and resist the reassurances requests, i really want to be with him, i hope it will get better.
You're welcome! I have a course for partners and programs for OCD sufferers if you all need help with recovery! www.MyOCDCoach.com
my partner and i have been romantically involved for almost 4 months. i’ve been wanting a label since month 2 but her ROCD keeps her from giving it to me. this made my anxiety over the label relax and it helped me understand her a bit better because she isn’t in a space to really speak on it yet. thank you
You’re welcome!
For six years I was insanely jealous of my best friend because I thought he was having an affair with the woman of my dreams. I spent $5000 on OCD therapy thinking mi intuition was completely wrong. It could not be. It was impossible. Not him. Not her. He was over 40 years her senior. Impossible, right?
Six years later, I realized that I had been right all along. And, for all I know, they are still having an affair. Perhaps you do not have ROCD. Perhaps you just have an uncanny intuition, like mine.
So, not because you may have OCD, it means that your intuition is mistaken. I was right all along and the therapy made me think it was all a delusion. The therapy actually masked the truth. Made me believe everything was just inside my mind. Now, I know it was all true. Every single time I thought they were together, they were.
So, as they say, not because you are paranoid it means that no one is after you.
A large majority of the time, my partner and I are very happy and have a healthy relationship. My OCD is triggered when he does something that legitmately upsets me, and then I start ruminating. He does acknowledge it and apologize, but of course that's not enough for my brain. Even though I want reassurance from my partner everything will be ok after we've had an argument or "I'll never do it again" if he did something to upset me, I don't seek it. However, because of his past and his own emotional "baggage," he gets triggered by the fact that I am ruminating and for lack of better terminology "making a big deal" out of something. He actually is a really good partner and we overall have a really healthy relationship but black-and-white thinking can make me think otherwise. Then, when I still seem upset after several hours, he starts to ruminate himself and get defensive, which triggers me further. How can we help each other during these moments?
You can make a big impact by getting to the recovery stage for OCD! Then "your stuff" won't trigger him. We all have things to work on, but we can only control ourselves! www.MyOCDCoach.com for programs!
Perosnly I feel that the partner "can" make it worse if they do not understand and even try helping but making it worse..
this happened to me I was shamed for having my thoughts by a girl I had to break up with. I would of felt a lot safer in the relationship. If she was secure enough in herself to see that these thoughts weren't a reflection of what I wanted and instead were testing behaviour of mine to see if she would stay with me if I confessed the details. I did it once and shouldn't have. But months, a year later it was used against me.
I turned 20 last dec 2023 since then i have been struggling a lot a little thing or pain makes me feel that i have some disease that is incurable its been 6 7 months now and not it is triggering my relationship of 1.5 years a random thought came "cheat him" "leave him" i told my bf about it he thought it is because of my overthinking and that i took it serious ,these thoughts have created a network now and its been 2 months thinking this I'm not able to think anything else except for this i Don't go out that i would look at a random guy and cheat my bf and now i feel numb and no feeligms for my bf😢😢😢😢
omg i'never felt related more than with this video
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@@amy96496 I’ve been there, just know recovery is possible! You can have happy, healthy relationships!
@@MyOCDCoach but how ?? i'm in therapy but i still feel its not enough..i'm feeling a little bit better but there are days where it's too much..i don't know ..sometimes i feel like this relationship is giving me a lot of anxieity but at the end of the day he is really cool and sweet...
@@amy96496 essentially, you apply ERP. Every time I was city shows up. You do this with each of the fthoughts and ththemes and tell her no longer bothering you. Your compulsions need to get to zero, so hopefully her therapist is helping you identify all of them, as there are sneaky ones.
@@MyOCDCoach hi i wanted to
Let you know That im really better since I was in therapy. The only thing is that I spiralled again cause I had some fights with my bf which I really care about and I want to stay with him but he had some issues and this gave me a lot of anxiety. Also now he is away abroad on a holiday with some friends and I’m really anxious with panic attacks cause I have some trauma with disco due to my previous experiences.
Anyway I started to spiral again with anxiety and I’m stuck again in fears and thoughts.
Anyway the other day I had an intrusive thoughts both tinder since I was thinking “ what If I just install tinder and scroll the home and then talk with boys just to prove myself that I care about him and I really love him cause I do care and want him”…. But now I have this image of me cheating and I’m stuck in this Thought and I began doing this compulsion again “ am I gonna download tinder ? No!, am I gonna sleep or talk with other boys? No!… and now it cause me a lot of anxiety cause I don’t know if I’m gonna do it but I know for sure I can’t sleep or talk to another boy because It disgusts me .. but I’m afraid I’m gonna do also because I’m really anxious because of his holiday … which makes me mad …. Cause I know I’m weak because I have trust issues … but I’m also so scared I’m gonna do this … like I’m gonna do it … it’s driving me crazy cause it’s like so fucking easy .. I get so trigger when someone talk about tinder or I see the App Store and I’m avoiding the App Store …. anyway my therapist is on holiday so I can’t even like confess to my therapist 😭😭… what should I do ? Am I cheater ? Am I gonna be a cheater ? Omg im so confused and it’s also really bad for me … cause I don’t know … it makes me so mad … I have this fucking things in my head .. I have images of me that go on tinder and just fuck with boys but I’m not like this I swear to god 😭😭
Hi Danielle, thank you for making this video.
My partner has OCD and was recently diagnosed with ROCD after a triggering and traumatic loss in his family. Shortly after the loss, he started confessing all of his thoughts to me about how he negatively views me and frequently compares me to other women.
At this point, we both understand that these are a result of his ROCD and he is getting treatment and medication. However, I am really really struggling with knowing all of these things and a lot of pain and damage has been caused.
I was wondering if you know of any support groups for partners or have any advice for dealing with this?
Thank you so much.
I have a Facebook group for partners, although it’s not very active. I’m working on a course for partners, but this is a good idea. Let me put some thought into it!
@@MyOCDCoach Is it possible for someone to have narcissistic personality disorder and ROCD? I got that impression often. I felt it wasn't that she was intentionally "mean", just that her focus was so fixated on her own needs.
@@growtocycle6992 anything is possible
I just breaking up 24/7 and sometimes when she says she loves me it feels like someone just died in front of me
Have you gotten help with this? The urge to break up is the compulsion of - avoidance. Your brain is trying to keep you safe from something that it doesn't need to. Avoidance only reinforces anxiety and OCD.
@@MyOCDCoach I'm not trying to avoid contact, sometimes a little but I do the opposite. Sorry, I ment to say I'm breaking up in my own head, thoughts and visions and conversations of me breaking up, or disappointing her or I visualize her crying. Sorry I confused you.
Can I become one of ur patients? I really need help, I feel like I wanna die and my mind and heart is gonna explode
Please visit www.myocdcoach.com for options of working with me.
Tell me, can relationship OCD be together with love addiction?
I answered you on your other post.
I read you shouldn’t tell your partner about your rocd cause many reasons I was planning on it now I’m not sure. What should I do?
It’s different for everyone and there’s no right or wrong answer. I would suggest not going into details about the specific thoughts.
I think my boyfriend has this, we were really happy and out of nowhere he said he feels like he has everything he ever wanted but from the wrong person. Everything he said before that was positive and loving then he switched in like a day and said that. Do people with ROCD doubt they love their partner even though they show they do? Does it sometimes feel like a lie to them? He has basically said he can’t do it anymore for this reason does this happen often?im so lost and confused I want to help but he has pushed me away
Yes, exactly that. You both can schedule a call with me and I can explain to him what is happening and how to get better if you’d like. calendly.com/myocdcoach/dc
I would love to but sadly he has shut me out and won’t talk to me at the moment.
@@freyalloyd7122 I’m sorry! You’re going to have to let him have his journey, whatever that may be. Until he gets ERP treatment, he’s likely to continue to struggle. You could send him one of my videos.
Thank you. Do you do sessions for partners of people with rocd or just the people with rocd?
@@freyalloyd7122 I do.
Hey I am going to tell you my story and please answer me, my girlfriend have OCD and our relationship is good she always comes to me and she tells me that I am the only one who calms her down and I can't describe how much she loves me and I love her we really really love each other and care so much for each other, so there is thing that makes her think and trigger the ocd which is when we want to go to study if she tells me let's go her ocd will be triggerd and she will have thoughts like you told him let's go he won't love you and so and I always reassures her and I tell her that I understand her, so we came up with a solution that is whenever we are going to study or something I am the one who is going to say let's go so her ocd will mot be triggerd and these thoughts come up, so what happened yesterday is we were talking and I did not tell her let's go so she felt like the time is running and we have to study but she don't want to tell me and I was talking to her and I didn't tell her because I thought we were talking and we will go later but she kept waiting for me to say let's go and this wastes her time for studying and these thoughts came that she is going to fail and so and if she told me the other thoughts of he won't love you will come up so she told me that she is tired and wanna be alone because she is tired of these thoughts and she left me, but she loves me but she can't stand feeling this pressure all the time and I understand but I lover her and will not let her go because we love each other but she just want to be by herself so she cannot have these thoughts which really makes her tired so I wanna know what to do I wanna help her and get her back we love each other so much so how do I do this please help me to get her back and fight this together and I told her that we will fight it together and so but she keeps refusing because she is tired she is like running away from these thoughts no matter what she just want to relax, so please tell me how to help her and get her back and be together and what should I do, and she just keeps pushing me away
Sorry for this amount of writing but I really need her back and so I need help so whoever reads this please help me
Trying not to trigger her “seems” like the right thing to do but it’s not. If she’s not learning the proper recovery skills, she won’t know this. Have her watch my videos or visit my site to get proper help. www.MyOCDCoach.com
@@MyOCDCoach okay I will tell her but what should i do to get her back I mean should I leave her alone and she will think and will come back or should I be with her and tell her again that we are going to control everything and that I love her and let's not waste our love and be together and get better together or should I just be there ask about her Dailly just like a friend
What if there is a bad argument and the other person says they don’t know if they want to be with me? Is needing reassurance after that ROCD? Seems like it would be normal to want reassurance after a bad argument where the relationship is on the line and hurtful comments are made.
You’re right, that could be normal. It’s all about when and why. When it’s in response to intrusive thoughts and OCD, but it could be a Compulsion.
Does anybody gets intrusive thoughts about their ex while being in a new relationship... intusive thoughts like what if i want to go back to my ex... and again and again checking if you really feel that way but you don't want to go back and repeatedly getting the memories and the name of your ex playing on loop in your head. Please somebody say something I'm really frustrated.
yes me but not with an ex but a person i liked...i started to think, omg now i'm going to date him, to message him and this is going to break up things with my bf ...
@@amy96496 so your mind is making up all this?
@@thelife_ofkhushi yes but actually it got triggered by something and then here we are again… stucked in da loop again 😅…. It really sucks for me
@Amina Pietri just don't try to resist the thoughts and feelings and let them be as they are or try to disregard
i kinda get this but not really me and my bf are in a happy and healthy relationship and i just get these thoughts out of nowhere, i don’t like my ex at all i’m fact i hate him so that’s why it confuses me on why the thoughts are popping up and i hate it so much the same thing happens with me but not all the time when i try to distract myself it’s like the name keeps replaying on a loop and i hate it because my head says things that i don’t mean it has unwanted thoughts and it makes me feel like i’m going crazy,and it could be with anybody my head says something about a random person like for example” oh that person is so fine” but i’m reality j don’t think that at all i feel like my head feels the need to say that knowing i don’t mean it i’m only attracted to my bf i only care about him and it’s so frustrating with these thoughts because i know these thoughts are not real and i try to distract myself from them, sorry for the rant this is just the first comment sort of explaining stuff better that i’ve found, but yea i know that i don’t find anyone else attractive other then my bf and i’m so sure of that too it just feels like my head says that so fast that j can’t even seem to stop it anymore but i’m trying to work on myself and make it better because i know that i rlly do love my bf like i say i do and the part that makes me feel better sometimes is knowing that these thoughts aren’t real, there not how i actually feel and that’s exactly why i’m trying to watch videos on it trying to fix myself and i also know that trying to stop the thoughts a lot can help them get worse but what i try to do when something pops up in my head or my head says something that i don’t want it too or that i don’t mean is quickly say to myself “ not true” or talk to myself about it and say “ i reject that thought” i’ve gotten that idea on tiktok but idk it seems to work sometimes again sorry for the rant 😭
I got one question… I dont ask myself „does this feel right ?“… It dont feel right … Is there a difference ?.. Or does this feeling come from ROCD ?
Actually, yes