*Wondering if you had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist
Look at what people do and what they do not do before choosing to believe their words. Behavior ultimately reveals people's true feelings and motivations - even if they claim otherwise.
23 years and two kids later my fate is sealed, but thank you for all you do. I am using what I have learned to teach my boys and save them from the same fate.
Death! Daughter in law - covert narcissist. Stole our son, grandkids, and family connection. My husband, daughter, and I would not be obedient to her demands. We have been abandoned! We had to come to an understanding that letting go was all me could do. This is worst than death. Saying goodbye to family living life and you love them.
Just ended something that felt unreal, she was too in love with everything related to me, my life, family, hobbies etc. She started using the "love you" extremely early and wanted a relationship. But she hid her past to the point of anger, and she got very cold in the end. Guys - two months is TOO early to proclaim love. As a guy, I usually test things for up to a year or two just for a girlfriend. Consistency over time, in bad and good and her staying feminine is key. Rapid behavior change exposes her manipulation.
0 commitment, you give to a fault, you tolerate mistreatment thinking it will change and get better but you’re only getting abused and drained until u hit the breaking point ! Most horrible experience you end up feeling deceived and a shell of yourself
Every single point is so spot on. Dealing and eventually being discarded by a covert narcissist was one of the most confusing and traumatic experiences. It took me 1,5 years of therapy to somewhat rebuild myself. How can a person change so much? It is mindboggling.
Because they TAP into a deep part of the brain. The frontal lobes and amygdala can physically change. All of a sudden you find yourself getting sudden panics over medial tasks and fixable problems. Loathing, ruminating, confusion. They really go hard with it. ☺️🌸💯
I’m going through the same thing with my ex wife who discarded me 8 months into the marriage. The worst part about it is that she did the same thing 20 years ago when she was my girlfriend. I didn’t know anything about narcissism. If only I had known
10. She tells other people in your social circle how amazing you are and how much they admire you. Only to later on turn people in your social circle against you for simply having boundaries or not appreciating her.
My brother’s girlfriend does this in front of him, but has bitched about him behind his back when he had to briefly leave the house and she wanted us to feel sorry for her (I’m not sure why she thought we would side with her, but a lot of it was to do with his ex I.e. the mother of his son). Then a few weeks after, they had a big argument in front of his son and her two youngest kids and he didn’t speak to her for a week, so she turned up at my mums house playing the victim and bitching about him and his son. The next day, before any of us had a chance to speak to him, for some reason, he got back with her (I don’t think he knows everything that was said, but he also isn’t open to listening to any of it). After that, my brother was told she wasn’t welcome at my parents house (there’s more to it, but trying to keep it short). Since then, she has started posting “date night” pictures on Facebook and the text is always really soppy and over the top. She also includes pictures of them being a “family unit” and posts pictures of his son with her kids. Anyone reading it wouldn’t have a clue that they had briefly split up a few months ago and they would never guess that she was extremely negative about him and his son. It’s all extremely fake
This is the first video I've seen from this channel and 10 minutes in I can tell this woman is a genius. Thank you so much, this is groundbreaking for me. So many things suddenly make sense now.
Thank you so much for raising awareness about narcissists. People like you are angels on earth, helping save victims from the emotional torture they endure.🙏🙏
Dear lord!!! You just described to the letter exactly what a woman with BPD did to me. She was so intoxicatingly attractive and genuine that I fell quickly. Then, without warning, she ghosted me.
This is EXACTLY what happened to me. My girlfriend imo had both BPD that was comorbid with NPD. While she did have impulsiveness/that huge fear of abandonment that was consistent with NPD - her love bombing was evident and was a 1:1 matchup with everything you said in this video. Most people when they talk about love bombing they talk about the version where the partner gives money, buys gifts, etc. I did that in my relationship, but it was not to manipulate. It was to show my girlfriend how much I appreciated her. Also my behavior never changed over a period of time. It was consistent. With her though, her behavior drastically changed over the course of time and she became more manipulative and that lack of empathy became clear. I will say that I was not perfect though and when watching this video I understand exactly how I got caught in this type of relationship. Prior to getting involved with her, I was single for 3 years. I was longing for a deep connection with someone and hoped that I met my person. So when I was being idealized, told all these great things about myself, having my interests mirrored and put on that pedestal - I soaked it all in as I was craving that from a relationship (and she knew this due to me sharing this vulnerability with her prior). My eagerness to be in a healthy loving relationship is the reason why despite seeing the red flags, I tried to rationalize them, and I wanted early commitment to the relationship as well. This is why I say motivations are important. I wanted an early commitment to the relationship because I intended to be an honest, loving, caring boyfriend who had the best interest of my girl at heart. I wanted to build a future and create memories with the beautiful woman who I “thought” I fell in love with since we had such a deep connection. But her motive for wanting early commitment in the relationship was for me to not see the “real” version of her that would slowly reveal itself had enough time passed by. Oh well. While I am still healing, you live and you learn. I am not proud to admit all of this, but at the same time you must look within and realize why you ended up in the relationship in the first place so that you can avoid it in the future. Stay strong guys ❤🙏🏾
Yeah, future faking. I remember one time when I was really starting to wake up to her narkiness, she came into the room, gave me that angelic look like she did when we first got together and sat beside me. She told me we were going to get our own place so it would just be the two of us without family or roommates. She knew I always wanted this. By this point, I realized that she was lying, but how cruel can someone be? This broke my heart and still hurts when I think about it! Glad it's over.... 😃❤🙏✌💔
I came out of a relationship that was kind of what you describe in the video. I never really thought i was making her happy. And all i wanted to do was to make her happy, feel secure around me and not doubting whether or not i loved her. It was exhausting to be honest in a very weird way, nothing like anything i had tried before. And what was really amazing to witness and think back on was how simialar my ex and mother are in the sense of never being satisfied, and me having that same feeling of not being enough!
Great video, A month ago, my five-year relationship came to an end. I really can't stop thinking about the love of my life, who made the decision to leave me. I've done everything in my power to win him back, but it's all in vain, and I can't imagine my life with anyone else. I genuinely miss him and just can't stop thinking about him, even though I've tried my hardest to stop thinking about him. I'm not sure why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
Absolutely bang on that which I experienced and still recovering from .... You exlain such great and precise detail too , amazing !! I'm six months no contact and still learning how to find myself again , This particular video is one of the best and most helpful for me yet As you help me understand in a more solidified way ,I felt my feelings shift a little Thankyou 🙏
Imagine mine .. We are Muslims from Morocco and she is covert and hiding behind religion (that is giving mothers a very high place just after God and the Prophet) and used religion as a manipulation weapon and a way to anesthetize
I am not afraid of much, but after my ex of 9 years that I lived with, discarded me after a heated argument and never let me back in. THAT is legit scary. No bye to the cats or my step daughter. It's like a spell was cast on me.
I wanted to take things SLOW, she was pressing the accelerator. She told me she loved me very early on. I said, "Things are going well, but it's too soon for that." She seemed embarrassed and apologized a bunch of times. (I thought the apology was a good sign.. narcs don't apologize.) But there were many other red flags, which I noted in my head, or sometimes my journal. I was able to see her split, where I started to become painted black when I didn't answer questions to her liking. I ended the relationship after several months, before I felt any connection and I immediately blocked her everywhere on every app.
The insistent apology sounds more like a Borderline Personality Disorder. She may very well have BPD & NPD Cormobidities. Wealth of info on both. Good Luck stay safe and be well
Wow,this young woman that is studying Psychology was all into the music I like and you described every detail what she was doing to me and I had so much opened up for her to slowly started to emotionally enslaved me and then she began to pull back and ghost me, pretty much psychologically was toying me around. I'm 34 and she is 23 years old and I let her go because she was not empathetic, manipulative and was feeding me crumbs to keep me strung along. Thankfully I called it her out and let her go,even though I'm not an expert but I felt many Red Flags from past relationships.
lol you just explained my ex girlfriend, told me she loved me 2 weeks in & would spam me saying “I love you sooo so much” 😂and wanted to get married after a month, ran away from that after two months now I feel like I have a super power to avoid red flags 🚩
You are explaining my ex wife. You are absolutely correct about it being extremely exhausting. 25 years with her and I was never able to keep her happy or satisfied. 17:32 …”a real man” I absolutely feel sorry for the person who ends up with my ex wife. I heard that statement so many times. Not gonna lie… it had an impact on my self esteem for years until I looked at her one day and made the statement… “a real man doesn’t allow someone shallow to control his emotions.” She did not like that.
That's the real carrot narcissists dangle. They'd just be happy IF... you jump through one more hoop! But it never happens no matter what you do. And it leaves you feeling like you're just not good enough. Sorry you went through that 🙏❤️
I've heard plenty of women talk about "real men" through social media over the past few years. They use the shame tactics to try and get their own needs met or they just have some inner healing work to do. Either way it got to the point where I just unfriended them out of self respect. Most of those women I didn't even know personally anyway
@@CommonEgo … it’s okay now. I am lonely from time to time and still deal with the side effects of it but understand that abuse is not something I am going to deal with anymore. I just don’t understand why she has never been able to actually own or apologize for it. I mean I do but I don’t. I’m sorry you had to experience bad relationships as well from your past videos. I hope the best for you.
I just came out of a trauma bond with a female narcissist. She did all of those things already in week one. After three months I have finally broken this circle and freed myself. No contact. Goodbye
1. Mirror your interest (eg will say, oh wow even I love that just in 3rd date) 2. Early declarations of love (within one month) 3. Fast physical connection (sexual terms not normal physical intimacy) 4. Hypersexuality (will try to subtly touch you in inappropriate places like you will feel awkward and undure as well as your intuition will tell you something off) 5. She's only happy when She's center of attention (feeling jealous when you take the attention) 6. Future faking (like we women do but she'll tell you in such a way that your intuition will tell you again something is off) 7. Boundary crossing (indirectly try to control you through her insecurities where you will feel pity where other will tell you its toxic) 8. Fluctuations in intensity (hot and cold behavior but subtly, as you go deep you'll get to know where you will question yourself) 9. Manipulation (tell they know you well where you dk much, see in reality you are what you hide and you know what you hide no one has right to tell you that if they tells you then it's gaslighting) More points from my perspective 1. Subtle insult 2. Physical and verbal light abuse 3. You feel closed around everyone 4. Discourage you 5. Roasts your opinion in private but will praise you in front of others.
bumped into an ex from 30 years ago,to cut a long story short dated for a year,was like looking after a child,abusive texts,ghosted,eventually got a text out the blue "i've met someone and wouldn't be fair to carry on".
Dammit. My ex who I thought just had high anxiety, did all of this. She used sex to avoid conflict even when she broke up with me. She love bombed me but never wanted deep conversations. She didn’t like being wrong. She flat out discarded me with a dozen excuses that didn’t make sense and now 6 months later she told me she never loved me and threatened me after future faking and telling me she loved me so much it would ache and she missed me so much it hurt. She had a whole plan for us getting married. She had demands for how I showed her I loved her but she was so sweet and affectionate from day one that it never seemed aggressive or controlling. She was almost crying on our first date telling me how much she liked me and was spamming I love yous by week three. She was always sweet and flirty and sending tons of videos and pictures of herself some of them directed to me and some of them I couldn’t tell if she was just showing out and posting to her TikTok or Instagram, which are both private. She was very private and didn’t ever connect with me on social media. Now she acts like I never existed even when she sees me at the gym or even at the movie theater last weekend I saw her run out of the movies to avoid me seeing her with her new bf. She would try to tell me to do stuff to show I loved her and I told her that wasn’t genuine if I just did them on a clock instead of from my heart. She had a hard time controlling me and I think the last time I called her out for taking me for granted was what broke her and she discarded me two weeks later. The sad part is I don’t know if it was all a lie and she was being honest when she said she never loved me or if she truly did love me and we were special. It hurts so bad when I see her with this new guy. I still love her but she acts like I’m a plague. I can’t come to terms with what really happened nor why she broke up with me in the first place.
I'm hesitant to tell long term friends or even family that I love them. For a person I wasn't ever romantically interested in to almost immediately tell everyone I'm their "best friend" and telling me they "love me" was startling. I didn't realize this was love bombing.
This same alleged friend also would spring their suicidal ideations on me when they didn't want to be alone. Conveniently forgetting that they had a boyfriend waiting on them. I've learned firsthand that people aren't selectively immoral, it just isn't your turn yet.
Unfortunately theres a narcissistic succubus that i know and avoided who is setting her next trap with most of these tactics. Shes not even done with her divorce and looking for the next man to take care of her and her kids (including myself which she shared a few things post about things im interested in).
I just recently started seeing this girl within the last 3 weeks. Although I’ve known her for a four years but haven’t seen her for that long. After a couple of dates she is calling me her best friend, the best sex shes ever had, she’s fallen for me and (passively but seriously) asked me to move in with her. I’ve only seen her a handful of times. I’ve tried to set boundaries early doors and establish trust that we need to get to know each other better but it just continues. There’s also huge attempts to get me to be vulnerable and share some of my biggest weaknesses some of which I have but I know at some point those will be used against me. I like her and she seemingly carries the values someone I would like to have a relationship with and want to try and build upon slowly, but I get led down conversational cul-de-sacs where if I don’t reciprocate intense love messages to her she goes fucking mad at me if I don’t tell her what she wants to hear.
Ex GF had talks about marriage and babies. Poor girl can’t even take me to go to the doctors proper. As more time when on, the more you realize it was the right thing to do.
My recent ex, id know when she was love bombing new supply because of her sudden interests in niche hobbies and interests, suddenly as if she'd become a decades long enthusiast despite never having expressed an interest until that moment in the years id known her.
Timeline of the relationship…. Ended 50 years ago …for decades I blamed myself for the breakup. The night we met She said “she would never leave me” and in a very real sense she never has. Your insights are releasing me from shame and guilt!
And when its all said and done, the love bomber will actually believe that the other person was the real narcissist and have no idea...... They will use the experience to feel victimized and leverage the situation to damage the other person's reputation and make themselves look like a good person. I can not tell you how many times a gal has told me she was married to a narcissist? Its like 90% of men are seen as narcissist to these types of women. So, love bombing and reputation destruction are deal breakers for me.
So true...all of it. She declared love 2nd date...sex was awesome in beginning n then used n withhold to manipulate me for nxt 2 years...lies n gaslighting all the time.
I know this one girl who gets her apartment paid for by a narcissist. She’s a covert narcissist pumped up by him, the grandiose type. She’s a consummate critic of anybody without PERFECT RESULTS. If there were a room full of 5 people, and we all saw something happen, she would play leader and convince all of us that this is over our heads.” 😬🤙🏿💯6:28 Ya, they bring it on hard and make you feel amazing. Years later when your counting pennies and wondering why you have no business, friends, or life. 😉👈🏻💯narcissists take people out.
Good day your videos make me happy and depressed knowing the reality what I’m going through. my wife for 10 years have all the characteristic of what you trying to explain I’m going through hell I love this woman so much but enough is enough every few weeks she still come to me and I feel it’s just to have sex because the day of the action she’s all lovey-lovey and the next day she hate my gutsI cannot let her go because my love is too strong, but I need to be strong. Thanks to you. I’m learning how to battle this situation.😢
☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ I remember her telling me “I love you” while we’re doing it in bed. I mean what are you suppose to do 😂 She was living in my house within a month …… Man I let all my defenses down.
17:29 - was all too familiar in my experience. The old me used to internalize this and feel a sense of shame. Now when I hear this I see a red flag and gracefully bow out.
A covert narcissist is masking her/his own poor self image. I found this out when she said in the beginning, "Why are you interested in a girl like me", "I'm just a ...", then came the love bombing, manipulation, devaluation and dump. This cycle took only about 6 months. The first cycle was weak, then came a second cycle that was much stronger. Being a noob about this, around this time I was researching this behavior and figure out what is going on. I broke free, tho that love bombing was super great (wink, nudge)
my ex covert narc asked me in the beginning if I think that she is a bad person, which I totally didnt get, because everyone liked her and she was like a saint. Also further statements like : I'd be a bad mother...ect. Even if you dont get it at that time remember to listen carefully and believe people when they show you who they are.
Hey Christine. Is it necessary to go for therapy after leaving an emotionally abusive relationship? I recently left one, and I feel so angry that I allowed this woman to pressurise and control me. I also feel very angry about how my interests were diminished and used against me to make me feel guilty and worthless.
*Wondering if you had a relationship with a narcissist?* Download the FREE checklist to see how your experience stacks up to the phases of narcissistic abuse: www.commonego.com/checklist
Also if they'll never commit to WHEN these promises are to occur, they always use the words "one day" but never give you any specific time frame
Look at what people do and what they do not do before choosing to believe their words. Behavior ultimately reveals people's true feelings and motivations - even if they claim otherwise.
23 years and two kids later my fate is sealed, but thank you for all you do. I am using what I have learned to teach my boys and save them from the same fate.
Death! Daughter in law - covert narcissist. Stole our son, grandkids, and family connection. My husband, daughter, and I would not be obedient to her demands. We have been abandoned! We had to come to an understanding that letting go was all me could do. This is worst than death. Saying goodbye to family living life and you love them.
Just ended something that felt unreal, she was too in love with everything related to me, my life, family, hobbies etc. She started using the "love you" extremely early and wanted a relationship. But she hid her past to the point of anger, and she got very cold in the end.
Guys - two months is TOO early to proclaim love. As a guy, I usually test things for up to a year or two just for a girlfriend. Consistency over time, in bad and good and her staying feminine is key. Rapid behavior change exposes her manipulation.
0 commitment, you give to a fault, you tolerate mistreatment thinking it will change and get better but you’re only getting abused and drained until u hit the breaking point ! Most horrible experience you end up feeling deceived and a shell of yourself
My ex told me I have a anger problem. It's nuts.
Every single point is so spot on. Dealing and eventually being discarded by a covert narcissist was one of the most confusing and traumatic experiences. It took me 1,5 years of therapy to somewhat rebuild myself. How can a person change so much? It is mindboggling.
Describes my experience, including 1.5 years of clinical Psychology PhD counseling to "somewhat" get over it.
Because they TAP into a deep part of the brain. The frontal lobes and amygdala can physically change. All of a sudden you find yourself getting sudden panics over medial tasks and fixable problems. Loathing, ruminating, confusion. They really go hard with it. ☺️🌸💯
I’m going through the same thing with my ex wife who discarded me 8 months into the marriage. The worst part about it is that she did the same thing 20 years ago when she was my girlfriend. I didn’t know anything about narcissism. If only I had known
Just happened to me.Never seen someone change from a partner to an enemy over a day or two.Really is sickening
10. She tells other people in your social circle how amazing you are and how much they admire you. Only to later on turn people in your social circle against you for simply having boundaries or not appreciating her.
They only praise you in front of others for others to be in owe with them, their ability to praise someone and look so nice to be so humble and moral
Well said I call it Buys you expensive and sells you too cheap
My brother’s girlfriend does this in front of him, but has bitched about him behind his back when he had to briefly leave the house and she wanted us to feel sorry for her (I’m not sure why she thought we would side with her, but a lot of it was to do with his ex I.e. the mother of his son).
Then a few weeks after, they had a big argument in front of his son and her two youngest kids and he didn’t speak to her for a week, so she turned up at my mums house playing the victim and bitching about him and his son.
The next day, before any of us had a chance to speak to him, for some reason, he got back with her (I don’t think he knows everything that was said, but he also isn’t open to listening to any of it). After that, my brother was told she wasn’t welcome at my parents house (there’s more to it, but trying to keep it short).
Since then, she has started posting “date night” pictures on Facebook and the text is always really soppy and over the top. She also includes pictures of them being a “family unit” and posts pictures of his son with her kids. Anyone reading it wouldn’t have a clue that they had briefly split up a few months ago and they would never guess that she was extremely negative about him and his son. It’s all extremely fake
My favorite is after this discard the random I miss you texts I get from time to time. Must not be as green on the other side as she thought 😂
This is the first video I've seen from this channel and 10 minutes in I can tell this woman is a genius. Thank you so much, this is groundbreaking for me. So many things suddenly make sense now.
Thank you so much for raising awareness about narcissists. People like you are angels on earth, helping save victims from the emotional torture they endure.🙏🙏
Your voice is incredibly peaceful sounding. ASMR at its finest!
Dear lord!!! You just described to the letter exactly what a woman with BPD did to me. She was so intoxicatingly attractive and genuine that I fell quickly. Then, without warning, she ghosted me.
She told you she had bpd? Just curious.
You were lucky...she could have stayed.
Did she ever come back?
This is EXACTLY what happened to me. My girlfriend imo had both BPD that was comorbid with NPD. While she did have impulsiveness/that huge fear of abandonment that was consistent with NPD - her love bombing was evident and was a 1:1 matchup with everything you said in this video. Most people when they talk about love bombing they talk about the version where the partner gives money, buys gifts, etc. I did that in my relationship, but it was not to manipulate. It was to show my girlfriend how much I appreciated her. Also my behavior never changed over a period of time. It was consistent. With her though, her behavior drastically changed over the course of time and she became more manipulative and that lack of empathy became clear.
I will say that I was not perfect though and when watching this video I understand exactly how I got caught in this type of relationship. Prior to getting involved with her, I was single for 3 years. I was longing for a deep connection with someone and hoped that I met my person. So when I was being idealized, told all these great things about myself, having my interests mirrored and put on that pedestal - I soaked it all in as I was craving that from a relationship (and she knew this due to me sharing this vulnerability with her prior). My eagerness to be in a healthy loving relationship is the reason why despite seeing the red flags, I tried to rationalize them, and I wanted early commitment to the relationship as well. This is why I say motivations are important. I wanted an early commitment to the relationship because I intended to be an honest, loving, caring boyfriend who had the best interest of my girl at heart. I wanted to build a future and create memories with the beautiful woman who I “thought” I fell in love with since we had such a deep connection. But her motive for wanting early commitment in the relationship was for me to not see the “real” version of her that would slowly reveal itself had enough time passed by.
Oh well. While I am still healing, you live and you learn. I am not proud to admit all of this, but at the same time you must look within and realize why you ended up in the relationship in the first place so that you can avoid it in the future. Stay strong guys ❤🙏🏾
Yeah, future faking. I remember one time when I was really starting to wake up to her narkiness, she came into the room, gave me that angelic look like she did when we first got together and sat beside me. She told me we were going to get our own place so it would just be the two of us without family or roommates. She knew I always wanted this. By this point, I realized that she was lying, but how cruel can someone be? This broke my heart and still hurts when I think about it! Glad it's over.... 😃❤🙏✌💔
Sorry you had to deal with that, and glad it's over for you too ❤🙏
Until one has gone through this one cannot understand what this is
@rodgerclotts1331 always look for two things:
Flattery and pity
I came out of a relationship that was kind of what you describe in the video. I never really thought i was making her happy. And all i wanted to do was to make her happy, feel secure around me and not doubting whether or not i loved her. It was exhausting to be honest in a very weird way, nothing like anything i had tried before.
And what was really amazing to witness and think back on was how simialar my ex and mother are in the sense of never being satisfied, and me having that same feeling of not being enough!
This is me right now. Giving her back to God. Only He can help her, or me from her abuse.
Great video, A month ago, my five-year relationship came to an end. I really can't stop thinking about the love of my life, who made the decision to leave me. I've done everything in my power to win him back, but it's all in vain, and I can't imagine my life with anyone else. I genuinely miss him and just can't stop thinking about him, even though I've tried my hardest to stop thinking about him. I'm not sure why I'm saying this here.
It's hard to say goodbye to someone you love; I experienced this when my 12-year relationship ended. However, I couldn't just let him go; instead, I tried everything to win him back. Eventually, I turned to a spiritual counsellor for assistance, and he was able to help me win him back.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
Absolutely bang on that which I experienced and still recovering from .... You exlain such great and precise detail too , amazing !!
I'm six months no contact and still learning how to find myself again ,
This particular video is one of the best and most helpful for me yet
As you help me understand in a more solidified way ,I felt my feelings shift a little
Thankyou 🙏
My mother is a Narcissist, she does everything you said. I see right through her.
I got C-Ptsd from her abuse.
Sorry to hear that. The effect of having a narcissist mother is intense and far reaching 🙏❤️
@CommonEgo , yes it is
Breathing exercises.pranaayama.
Imagine mine .. We are Muslims from Morocco and she is covert and hiding behind religion (that is giving mothers a very high place just after God and the Prophet) and used religion as a manipulation weapon and a way to anesthetize
I am not afraid of much, but after my ex of 9 years that I lived with, discarded me after a heated argument and never let me back in. THAT is legit scary. No bye to the cats or my step daughter.
It's like a spell was cast on me.
I wanted to take things SLOW, she was pressing the accelerator. She told me she loved me very early on. I said, "Things are going well, but it's too soon for that." She seemed embarrassed and apologized a bunch of times. (I thought the apology was a good sign.. narcs don't apologize.) But there were many other red flags, which I noted in my head, or sometimes my journal. I was able to see her split, where I started to become painted black when I didn't answer questions to her liking. I ended the relationship after several months, before I felt any connection and I immediately blocked her everywhere on every app.
The insistent apology sounds more like a Borderline Personality Disorder. She may very well have BPD & NPD Cormobidities. Wealth of info on both. Good Luck stay safe and be well
smart. i am going thru the same exact thing, and i will do the same exact thing you did, which is to bounce.
Good move!👏🏽
Good warnings for men and women!
Wow,this young woman that is studying Psychology was all into the music I like and you described every detail what she was doing to me and I had so much opened up for her to slowly started to emotionally enslaved me and then she began to pull back and ghost me, pretty much psychologically was toying me around.
I'm 34 and she is 23 years old and I let her go because she was not empathetic, manipulative and was feeding me crumbs to keep me strung along.
Thankfully I called it her out and let her go,even though I'm not an expert but I felt many Red Flags from past relationships.
lol you just explained my ex girlfriend, told me she loved me 2 weeks in & would spam me saying “I love you sooo so much” 😂and wanted to get married after a month, ran away from that after two months now I feel like I have a super power to avoid red flags 🚩
You are explaining my ex wife. You are absolutely correct about it being extremely exhausting. 25 years with her and I was never able to keep her happy or satisfied.
17:32 …”a real man”
I absolutely feel sorry for the person who ends up with my ex wife. I heard that statement so many times. Not gonna lie… it had an impact on my self esteem for years until I looked at her one day and made the statement… “a real man doesn’t allow someone shallow to control his emotions.” She did not like that.
That's the real carrot narcissists dangle. They'd just be happy IF... you jump through one more hoop! But it never happens no matter what you do. And it leaves you feeling like you're just not good enough. Sorry you went through that 🙏❤️
I've heard plenty of women talk about "real men" through social media over the past few years. They use the shame tactics to try and get their own needs met or they just have some inner healing work to do. Either way it got to the point where I just unfriended them out of self respect. Most of those women I didn't even know personally anyway
@@CommonEgo … it’s okay now. I am lonely from time to time and still deal with the side effects of it but understand that abuse is not something I am going to deal with anymore. I just don’t understand why she has never been able to actually own or apologize for it. I mean I do but I don’t.
I’m sorry you had to experience bad relationships as well from your past videos. I hope the best for you.
I just came out of a trauma bond with a female narcissist. She did all of those things already in week one. After three months I have finally broken this circle and freed myself. No contact. Goodbye
Yup same here 3 months was it for me, blocked her and never felt better
1. Mirror your interest (eg will say, oh wow even I love that just in 3rd date)
2. Early declarations of love (within one month)
3. Fast physical connection (sexual terms not normal physical intimacy)
4. Hypersexuality (will try to subtly touch you in inappropriate places like you will feel awkward and undure as well as your intuition will tell you something off)
5. She's only happy when She's center of attention (feeling jealous when you take the attention)
6. Future faking (like we women do but she'll tell you in such a way that your intuition will tell you again something is off)
7. Boundary crossing (indirectly try to control you through her insecurities where you will feel pity where other will tell you its toxic)
8. Fluctuations in intensity (hot and cold behavior but subtly, as you go deep you'll get to know where you will question yourself)
9. Manipulation (tell they know you well where you dk much, see in reality you are what you hide and you know what you hide no one has right to tell you that if they tells you then it's gaslighting)
More points from my perspective
1. Subtle insult
2. Physical and verbal light abuse
3. You feel closed around everyone
4. Discourage you
5. Roasts your opinion in private but will praise you in front of others.
No, a cruel, evil, empty and cold they don’t have any feelings or emotions 🙏🏻
Oh boy.. This definitely adds to everything.
bumped into an ex from 30 years ago,to cut a long story short dated for a year,was like looking after a child,abusive texts,ghosted,eventually got a text out the blue "i've met someone and wouldn't be fair to carry on".
Dammit. My ex who I thought just had high anxiety, did all of this. She used sex to avoid conflict even when she broke up with me. She love bombed me but never wanted deep conversations. She didn’t like being wrong. She flat out discarded me with a dozen excuses that didn’t make sense and now 6 months later she told me she never loved me and threatened me after future faking and telling me she loved me so much it would ache and she missed me so much it hurt. She had a whole plan for us getting married. She had demands for how I showed her I loved her but she was so sweet and affectionate from day one that it never seemed aggressive or controlling. She was almost crying on our first date telling me how much she liked me and was spamming I love yous by week three. She was always sweet and flirty and sending tons of videos and pictures of herself some of them directed to me and some of them I couldn’t tell if she was just showing out and posting to her TikTok or Instagram, which are both private. She was very private and didn’t ever connect with me on social media. Now she acts like I never existed even when she sees me at the gym or even at the movie theater last weekend I saw her run out of the movies to avoid me seeing her with her new bf. She would try to tell me to do stuff to show I loved her and I told her that wasn’t genuine if I just did them on a clock instead of from my heart. She had a hard time controlling me and I think the last time I called her out for taking me for granted was what broke her and she discarded me two weeks later. The sad part is I don’t know if it was all a lie and she was being honest when she said she never loved me or if she truly did love me and we were special. It hurts so bad when I see her with this new guy. I still love her but she acts like I’m a plague. I can’t come to terms with what really happened nor why she broke up with me in the first place.
I'm hesitant to tell long term friends or even family that I love them. For a person I wasn't ever romantically interested in to almost immediately tell everyone I'm their "best friend" and telling me they "love me" was startling. I didn't realize this was love bombing.
This same alleged friend also would spring their suicidal ideations on me when they didn't want to be alone. Conveniently forgetting that they had a boyfriend waiting on them. I've learned firsthand that people aren't selectively immoral, it just isn't your turn yet.
Unfortunately theres a narcissistic succubus that i know and avoided who is setting her next trap with most of these tactics. Shes not even done with her divorce and looking for the next man to take care of her and her kids (including myself which she shared a few things post about things im interested in).
Jumping from one relationship to the next is another red flag 🚩
I just recently started seeing this girl within the last 3 weeks. Although I’ve known her for a four years but haven’t seen her for that long.
After a couple of dates she is calling me her best friend, the best sex shes ever had, she’s fallen for me and (passively but seriously) asked me to move in with her. I’ve only seen her a handful of times.
I’ve tried to set boundaries early doors and establish trust that we need to get to know each other better but it just continues.
There’s also huge attempts to get me to be vulnerable and share some of my biggest weaknesses some of which I have but I know at some point those will be used against me.
I like her and she seemingly carries the values someone I would like to have a relationship with and want to try and build upon slowly, but I get led down conversational cul-de-sacs where if I don’t reciprocate intense love messages to her she goes fucking mad at me if I don’t tell her what she wants to hear.
Just 10 Days before discarding me after nearly 5 years we agreed to names for our future children. Man this crashed my reality
The male narc on my life did the same thing. Then discarded me in the worse way.
What you actual tell, people become scared to interact one to other person bij placing a flag.
Ex GF had talks about marriage and babies. Poor girl can’t even take me to go to the doctors proper. As more time when on, the more you realize it was the right thing to do.
My recent ex, id know when she was love bombing new supply because of her sudden interests in niche hobbies and interests, suddenly as if she'd become a decades long enthusiast despite never having expressed an interest until that moment in the years id known her.
good thing is once i know what type of person he she is..i instantly cut connections with them..i just shut them out..
Your sharing is validating my college experience with a certain someone.
Timeline of the relationship…. Ended 50 years ago …for decades I blamed myself for the breakup. The night we met She said “she would never leave me” and in a very real sense she never has. Your insights are releasing me from shame and guilt!
I'm so glad to hear some shame and guilt have been lifted. That's a lot to carry around 🙏❤️
And when its all said and done, the love bomber will actually believe that the other person was the real narcissist and have no idea...... They will use the experience to feel victimized and leverage the situation to damage the other person's reputation and make themselves look like a good person. I can not tell you how many times a gal has told me she was married to a narcissist? Its like 90% of men are seen as narcissist to these types of women. So, love bombing and reputation destruction are deal breakers for me.
Thank u sis...more content on
So true...all of it.
She declared love 2nd date...sex was awesome in beginning n then used n withhold to manipulate me for nxt 2 years...lies n gaslighting all the time.
you said that right.
How about breast implants?
Are narcs/covert narcs more likely to get plastic surgery?
I know this one girl who gets her apartment paid for by a narcissist. She’s a covert narcissist pumped up by him, the grandiose type. She’s a consummate critic of anybody without PERFECT RESULTS. If there were a room full of 5 people, and we all saw something happen, she would play leader and convince all of us that this is over our heads.” 😬🤙🏿💯6:28 Ya, they bring it on hard and make you feel amazing. Years later when your counting pennies and wondering why you have no business, friends, or life. 😉👈🏻💯narcissists take people out.
Hey Christina!! I miss ya! I hope you’re well 🙏♥️…. Are you playing me? 🤔🤣
Hey Pete!! Hope all is well with you too! And idk... guess you'll have to watch the video and find out! 🤣🤣
Wow so true
Good day your videos make me happy and depressed knowing the reality what I’m going through. my wife for 10 years have all the characteristic of what you trying to explain I’m going through hell I love this woman so much but enough is enough every few weeks she still come to me and I feel it’s just to have sex because the day of the action she’s all lovey-lovey and the next day she hate my gutsI cannot let her go because my love is too strong, but I need to be strong. Thanks to you. I’m learning how to battle this situation.😢
Give them
The old Irish ☘️ goodbye .. 😂👋 im an empath who uses all of my brain 🧠
How can these narcissist be so empty and cold?
They don’t know they are as bad as they behave.
First, one love sms each morning
☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️ ☑️
I remember her telling me “I love you” while we’re doing it in bed. I mean what are you suppose to do 😂
She was living in my house within a month ……
Man I let all my defenses down.
17:29 - was all too familiar in my experience. The old me used to internalize this and feel a sense of shame. Now when I hear this I see a red flag and gracefully bow out.
A covert narcissist is masking her/his own poor self image. I found this out when she said in the beginning, "Why are you interested in a girl like me", "I'm just a ...", then came the love bombing, manipulation, devaluation and dump. This cycle took only about 6 months. The first cycle was weak, then came a second cycle that was much stronger. Being a noob about this, around this time I was researching this behavior and figure out what is going on. I broke free, tho that love bombing was super great (wink, nudge)
my ex covert narc asked me in the beginning if I think that she is a bad person, which I totally didnt get, because everyone liked her and she was like a saint. Also further statements like : I'd be a bad mother...ect. Even if you dont get it at that time remember to listen carefully and believe people when they show you who they are.
Yeah...the sex was quite good and frequent :)
same.....'that a man like you could be interested in a girl like me' her exact words. wow. She had a terrible self image/self esteem
they move on you so quick move in after weeks why did'nt i see at the time but now its so clear
I really dont need you now I got the kids. Made me think
gives 9 signs of love bombing, but says they can be real too ...
Hey Christine. Is it necessary to go for therapy after leaving an emotionally abusive relationship?
I recently left one, and I feel so angry that I allowed this woman to pressurise and control me. I also feel very angry about how my interests were diminished and used against me to make me feel guilty and worthless.
🔥🎆☠
she is horrible
If she has rules and games is the correct way to tell when women are trying to manipulate and deceive Men