Resources for Help: Fathers 4 Justice South Africa: www.f4j.co.za/ Dope Black Dads: dopeblack.org/dopeblackdads/ Dope Dads: www.dopedads.org/ Usapho Foundation: www.usapho.org.za/ Growing up without a Father: growingupwithoutafather.org.za/ Mentor a Boy Child: mentoraboychild.org/ Amatyma by TT Mbha: youtube.com/@amatyma?si=6L45EgtEMUT3HyqI Family Advocate Offices in South Africa: www.justice.gov.za/fmadv/f_contacts.htm
You cannot have your cake and eat it too. The life you have created for yourself is one devoid of peace. Some situations cannot be fixed and that’s the honest truth.
My brother is going through this with his toxic baby mama. I had a bad fight with my toxic ex husband who wanted to run away to another country with our son, without me knowing & I fortunately got justice. I will use that experience to help my brother fight for fatherly rights.
Black Pen you have made a decision after doing all you have done just let it be because your children will find you and get to love you no matter what because you have done everything thus far.People will judge you just anyway that's just how human beings are.I salute for your choices
Penuel we hear you, we may pretend we don't because we are dealing with our own trauma. Yes having 7 kids out of wedlock was reckless but we are here now. We hear your pain bhuti.
This has been very eye opening and informative, Siyabonga. I don't have any kids yet myself, but there is so much to consider before making that decision.
Thanks for allowing us to learn through your pain brother. However we may judge you, reality is still reality and fact remains that many men are dealing with this. We obviously all hope you've really learned from this just as much as we are learning. Don't repeat the same mistakes bro. Healing to you, the mothers and mostly the kids. God bless
Tough on you oh young baba, you example will be watched , its the best move, draw your line, black or white no grey, salute you, keep us informed on develpoments, a lesson to others.
I find that looking at both party's perspective gives you a bird's eye view of the entire situation , meaning both sides bring their own versions of the Truth , but acknowledging both sides gives you The Truth. But it's up to you to use your instincts to decsern The Truth from the LIE. 🕊
Abstinence. Avoid premarital sex. Get a few counselling sessions with you future wife to iron out any issues before getting married. Take your time getting to know her and her family. These are just a few things to consider but can save you from a lifetime of trauma.
Bro, this life thing is unpredictable. You can do all those precautionary measures and premarital counselling but five years down the line with 2 kids you are facing divorce
@@mpumimdluli5894 I always tell Woman the same thing. You can marry a man,build him up,birth his Children and he will cheat with a younger Woman. So I tell Woman don't marry a man
@@mpumimdluli5894Life is unpredictable that is true my brother, but that is not an excuse not to take precautions. By your logic, I might as well not lock my car because it can get stolen either way; I should just walk around Khyalisha and Hanover Park because, what is the point, I can get shot even in the Suburbs; why wear a seatbelt and not drink and drive? I mean I can do all these things and still get injured or die in an accident; exercise for who, I mean even healthy people get heart attacks...... Precaution doesn't prevent bad things from happening, what it does is to minimize the risk of something bad happening in our lives. That is why we have locks, passwords, condoms, exercise, live in gated communities, etc. Penuel did not take any precautions and therefore cannot be lumped in the same category as men who took all the precautions and are denied access. We cannot compare Penuel and a divorced father with 7 kids from one woman who is denied access. The divorced father's situation is unfortunate, while Penuel's situation is a consequence of recklessness.
Toxic Babymamma? They were not toxic when you were playing 'hide the sausage' without a skin on. You cannot justify, no matter what, the children pick up the tab.
Depriving your child access to his/her father is very toxic babymama behavior. What's done is done, the babymamas need to heal from their hearbreak, seek therapy and allow Penuel access to his kids. It's his constitutional right. If my babydaddy kept me away from my child, I'd take the same course of action
Personally i THANK YOU Pen, I've watched all your vids relating your experiences with your baby mamas. I'm in the same situation n i get strength n insight from you, THANKS MAN🤛🏿👊🏿💯
After listening to the podcast my 2c. 4/7=57% is a pass rate. lady# 3/4/5 were risk takers. My grandpa used to tell me " if you are going to be stupid, youvhave to be brave." These are cards that has been dealt. Live and let live...keep on pushing forward. Dont feel guilty. Choose people that choose you. Life is short!!!!!
Just when I thought I've forgotten about everything Pen keeps bringing this topic, we must just accept here in SA men are not supposed to have anything.
@@patro8535if you decide to have kids outside of marriage, then you are making the choice to be a part time father who'll just show up on weekends, holidays, special occasions but not be there everyday through the daily trails of life. Every child has rights over its parents even before its born. To be born into stability, safety, good parents, etc. Some guidance from Islam is that you need to be a God conscious person, ensuring your relationship with your Creator is good and then you seek a righteous woman who is also devoted to her Creator. Someone who is sincerely God conscious will be striving to be loyal, an to live righteously. So if a man himself is not righteous and if he likes women who's behaviour is ungodly then surely chances are higher of that leading to a bad outcome. To determine compatibility you can also look at both families and recognize what possible unhealthy and unrighteous family dynamics exist and if it can be mitigated or not and whether your families are compatible in terms of values. Remember that each persons family is "their normal" and that's how cycles repeat in families if you don't learn to recognize what is good and what is bad. So that is where devotion to The Creator comes in, He lays the foundation upon which values to live by in your household. Forget the mainstream an remember that The Man was put as the head of the household, to bear the responsibility of being the provider and protector so the mother does not end up being stressed out providing and can therefore nurture the children, take better care of the house and herself (women can still earn money through their own businesses if they want to, without the pressure an stress of being the main provider). It's important to note that when modernism destroyed the traditional family systems, it destroyed society. People are more depressed and lost then ever in spite of technology and more access to wealth because the real key to happiness is through following the guidelines set out by Allah through his revelations over time ending with the final testament, the Quran.
People are quick to judge! There are videos to prove that penuel has been trying to reach out to his baby mamas but because of egos some of his baby mamas has they couldn’t find common ground to see his kids like the others does
But then again...We can't expect Bra god Pen to advocate for marriage that he wasn't raised in. All he knows from a dad is 17 siblings from different moms 😢😢😢😢
@@nyashamahleko7007 The children are not to blame. And the mother's deserve credit for looking after the children on a DAILY BASIS. The nerve of this man thinking being a MEANWHILE father is cool. It's all good to pay school fees, but Who stays up at night when the child is ill? Who supervises the homework and provides advise on the daily? Who makes sure the house is in order?
Please ensure that you DO NOT follow this path that GodPen chose. As much as he is intelligent, in this aspect he has found himself in an unfortunate lifetime rabbit hole of multiple families in multiple homes, in the name of procreation. A family can be polygamous, but that entails all parties living in THE SAME HOME, not scattered homes. As a father. Your influence has to go through the mother to your kids. That's just how influence works as childrendevelop. The general direction of influence in families is: Father -> Mother -> Children. Yes it is practically impossible for your influence on your OWN children to bypass the mother, since the mother is the primary nurturer of your children. That is why it is practically impossible to have influence on your growing children while having it fragmented between many homes. This is the importance of having your children in the SAME HOME as the mother of your children. PLEASE MAKE ONE HOME. ONE!! OR NONE!!!
Man, listen what's being said to understand. You're talking about HIV when he clearly States his kids were planned. Like he and the mothers had discussions before, only for them to switch up during pregnancy or after. You don't think those discussion involved and led to tests?
@@gwasheela4519 Maybe I don't understand English but where in the conversation did he say that the kids were planned cause He spoke about having access or only supposedly supporting 3 of those kids....🙏🙏🙏
Pen, I find it such a pity that ever since a bunch of negative haters came at you for why they think you're dead beat dad that you've since digressed from giving us the rich, informative political content that you used to and have since been explaining yourself to people who won't stop judging you anyway and also have their own shit that's probably even worse than what they were accusing you off. It's really sad how they got to you. Please come back! Please bring the content that we know and love you for because that's what your real followers are waiting for 😳😳😊. Please!
You know is sad that you guys on UA-cam focus more on negative comments. I really don't think is necessary for you to explain yourself based on negative comments. Sorry my brother be strong
Credit to Bra Penuel 👍🏽for being open nd sharing. 😂 Because we know some of yall u even lie nd say that firstborn is your younger sibling kanti hie bundle of joy yakho ieyani mazi thethe😂
Childsupport payment doesn't over all the bills of the children.If the Woman should give the money to the Father ,who is paying for rent,food,chool item,clothing,child item and other things.Woman mostly have to pay on top of the chilld support
One man's experience can be another man's lesson. I’m here to learn, so I don't have any opinions on your situation. In retrospect, did you notice any personality traits or behaviors in the women who are currently uncooperative that the others (the ones allowing you access to your kids) did not exhibit? Or would you say you were completely caught off-guard? I'm asking because, from what I gather, the lesson I'm taking from this is the importance of thoroughly vetting someone before committing. Relationships end, and I wonder if there's a way to identify whether someone will be vindictive if that happens. You might be tempted to absolve yourself by saying there was no way to know. But please think it through - I don't wanna have to think that I'll always be at the mercy of someone's whim. That may just put me off any kind of relationship honestly 😅 Edit: I posted this after seeing first vid but before watching this one and you answered my question: People lie: and people change; we're all our parent's kids - is what I'm getting. And all I can say is "Damn, knew her for 20 years and Shawty still pulled a fast one on you😂😂😂😂. Even NASA with their deep space telescopes couldn't see that one coming"
There is a way to know brother but it also takes you to be in a heathy state of mind as well. Some guidance from Islam is that you need to be a God conscious person, ensuring your relationship with your Creator is good and then you seek a righteous woman who is also devoted to her Creator. Someone who is sincerely God conscious will be striving to be loyal, an to live righteously. So if a man himself is not righteous and if he likes women who's behaviour is ungodly then surely chances are higher of that leading to a bad outcome. To determine compatibility you can also look at both families and recognize what possible unhealthy and unrighteous family dynamics exist and if it can be mitigated or not and whether your families are compatible in terms of values. Remember my brother that each persons family is "their normal" and that's how cycles repeat in families if you don't learn to recognize what is good and what is bad. So that is where devotion to The Creator comes in, He lays the foundation upon which values to live by in your household. Forget the mainstream an remember that The Man was put as the head of the household, to be the main provider an protector so the mother does not end up being stressed out providing and can therefore take care of the children, the house and herself. Pen needs to repent to The Creator for calling himself God, I really pray that he does because he seems genuine but Allah knows best what Pen's heart conceals. Anyone who wants serenity in their life needs to understand that contentment comes from having a good relationship with our Creator Allah, The Sustainer, The Only One worthy of worship upon whom everything and everyone is dependent on, The One who Decrees and is in Control of what happens to us to teach us lessons and to guide us. A blessed life is not having money and wealth but it's being satisfied with the life you have by practising grateful ness for the blessings we have and being patient with any difficulties of life until it passes because Allah says in the Quran "So, surely with hardship comes ease." 94:6 "Surely with ˹that˺ hardship comes ˹more˺ ease. " 94:7.
Another important thought for the youth to keep in mind is that when a man decides to not be married to a woman before having a child with her, the consequence is that he is unconsciously signing up to be a part time father. To be a full time father you need to start by finding a good wife as priority and then getting married before conceiving a child, in order to be fully present for the child, as a child's rights over it's parents is more than financial stability but it's time, it's effort, it's being present through the daily grind and not just weekends and holidays.
oh Maan Penuel,u overly explain yourself ngoku ,we understood the sensible masses understood .Now u r explaining to ppl who decided a long time ago that they choose to have a pre-conceived perception about you .Yibambe bhuti pheza Tata.❤
I get that you are frustrated, but honestly, you created this situation. Now, you are justifying child abandonment and violence towards women. You yourself are a toxic baby daddy, I mean 7 kids by 5 different women?? The courts didn't fail you. You failed yourself, and now you are failing your children. You should be seeking advice not giving it because abandoning your kids will never be a solution.
How is he a toxic baby daddy? I'm asking sincerely. He's spent years talking about trying to get access to his children that were made consentually and intentionally with all the women? How is he toxic?
@@zwaks.mthimkhulu He had a good job, but he quit it to chase his dream. He gives the baby mamas whatever he can, when he can. Some of the baby mamas are ambitious for themselves and their children they work hard to have a certain lifestyle, so whatever little he gives, doesn't help much, subsequently the mother's have to move heaven and earth to bridge the gap to ensure, the children have what they need.
Resources for Help:
Fathers 4 Justice South Africa: www.f4j.co.za/
Dope Black Dads: dopeblack.org/dopeblackdads/
Dope Dads: www.dopedads.org/
Usapho Foundation: www.usapho.org.za/
Growing up without a Father: growingupwithoutafather.org.za/
Mentor a Boy Child: mentoraboychild.org/
Amatyma by TT Mbha: youtube.com/@amatyma?si=6L45EgtEMUT3HyqI
Family Advocate Offices in South Africa: www.justice.gov.za/fmadv/f_contacts.htm
take it easy, don't take harsh decisions, Kids get affected latently
Thank you for sharing this Pen. There's no justice & no recourse for men
You cannot have your cake and eat it too. The life you have created for yourself is one devoid of peace. Some situations cannot be fixed and that’s the honest truth.
My brother is going through this with his toxic baby mama. I had a bad fight with my toxic ex husband who wanted to run away to another country with our son, without me knowing & I fortunately got justice. I will use that experience to help my brother fight for fatherly rights.
Casuel sex does destroyes lives. The children firstly and most importantly, then the mother and then the father. Also the grandparents are affected.
There are always two sides to a story and I would love to hear the mothers' side of it.
"having a baby mama will make you realise why your dad left you"
_plutoski
Famous last words of a man with no accountability..😂😂😂 They always pick their equals and then point fingers. The pathology is universal.
Yerr Sandile😂😂😂😭olala it's not looking lovely
Facts .... put a cape on dem facts 😂😂😂
Sadly history repeat itself by default ,we end up like those we swore we will never be like .
brain rot
Black Pen you have made a decision after doing all you have done just let it be because your children will find you and get to love you no matter what because you have done everything thus far.People will judge you just anyway that's just how human beings are.I salute for your choices
You are wild broh !! Imagine saying “my kids won’t eat them because I can’t see them ,I want to teach their mom a lesson !” Wow !..
Thats your opinion and how you chose to look at it.
✊️✊️✊️ thank you for educating men .
Well put BP this will make many youngsters wake up, put straight out, through experiance not just talk , good of you to share.
Penuel we hear you, we may pretend we don't because we are dealing with our own trauma. Yes having 7 kids out of wedlock was reckless but we are here now. We hear your pain bhuti.
@@angelnomvalo9157 udakiwe reckless
This has been very eye opening and informative, Siyabonga. I don't have any kids yet myself, but there is so much to consider before making that decision.
Thanks for allowing us to learn through your pain brother. However we may judge you, reality is still reality and fact remains that many men are dealing with this. We obviously all hope you've really learned from this just as much as we are learning. Don't repeat the same mistakes bro. Healing to you, the mothers and mostly the kids. God bless
Tough on you oh young baba, you example will be watched , its the best move, draw your line, black or white no grey, salute you, keep us informed on develpoments, a lesson to others.
I hear you bro as kids go older they will realize how you fought for them
I find that looking at both party's perspective gives you a bird's eye view of the entire situation , meaning both sides bring their own versions of the Truth , but acknowledging both sides gives you The Truth. But it's up to you to use your instincts to decsern The Truth from the LIE. 🕊
Abstinence. Avoid premarital sex. Get a few counselling sessions with you future wife to iron out any issues before getting married. Take your time getting to know her and her family. These are just a few things to consider but can save you from a lifetime of trauma.
Bro, this life thing is unpredictable. You can do all those precautionary measures and premarital counselling but five years down the line with 2 kids you are facing divorce
@@mpumimdluli5894I get you. People change but we do what we can including prenuptial agreements etc to lessen the blow.
@@mpumimdluli5894 I always tell Woman the same thing. You can marry a man,build him up,birth his Children and he will cheat with a younger Woman. So I tell Woman don't marry a man
@@mpumimdluli5894Life is unpredictable that is true my brother, but that is not an excuse not to take precautions. By your logic, I might as well not lock my car because it can get stolen either way; I should just walk around Khyalisha and Hanover Park because, what is the point, I can get shot even in the Suburbs; why wear a seatbelt and not drink and drive? I mean I can do all these things and still get injured or die in an accident; exercise for who, I mean even healthy people get heart attacks...... Precaution doesn't prevent bad things from happening, what it does is to minimize the risk of something bad happening in our lives. That is why we have locks, passwords, condoms, exercise, live in gated communities, etc. Penuel did not take any precautions and therefore cannot be lumped in the same category as men who took all the precautions and are denied access. We cannot compare Penuel and a divorced father with 7 kids from one woman who is denied access. The divorced father's situation is unfortunate, while Penuel's situation is a consequence of recklessness.
Amen.
Toxic Babymamma? They were not toxic when you were playing 'hide the sausage' without a skin on. You cannot justify, no matter what, the children pick up the tab.
Depriving your child access to his/her father is very toxic babymama behavior. What's done is done, the babymamas need to heal from their hearbreak, seek therapy and allow Penuel access to his kids. It's his constitutional right. If my babydaddy kept me away from my child, I'd take the same course of action
@@acceptinglife6491 he should pay to get access. the culture says so
You're a woman ne?
Udakiwe so they must deny him access... uyahlanya
Sometime it's the women that change and get back at you because your relationship with them didn't work out
lol Broh said “I’m only 45% deadbeat father ,Not 100% ,so talk to me nice “ 😅😅😅
😂😂 😂😂
Personally i THANK YOU Pen, I've watched all your vids relating your experiences with your baby mamas. I'm in the same situation n i get strength n insight from you, THANKS MAN🤛🏿👊🏿💯
After listening to the podcast my 2c.
4/7=57% is a pass rate.
lady# 3/4/5 were risk takers. My grandpa used to tell me " if you are going to be stupid, youvhave to be brave."
These are cards that has been dealt. Live and let live...keep on pushing forward. Dont feel guilty. Choose people that choose you. Life is short!!!!!
You have really learnt your lessons Penuel
My children were discussions with their mothers blah blah... Meanwhile 2 of them were pregnant at the same time.
Nowadays kids are used as weapons
Just when I thought I've forgotten about everything Pen keeps bringing this topic, we must just accept here in SA men are not supposed to have anything.
Penuel are you saying that as a proud father......
This is so complicated ...
Im 22 years old and you helping us alot sir ! MUCH RESPECT 💯
dont listen to this man. you will fucking regret it.. dont ruin your life by following his footsteps
@@Blaqrosse how ? make me understand bcs you know better
Please learn how not to mess up multiple lives just because you lack sexual discipline
@patro8535 Seek help.
@@patro8535if you decide to have kids outside of marriage, then you are making the choice to be a part time father who'll just show up on weekends, holidays, special occasions but not be there everyday through the daily trails of life. Every child has rights over its parents even before its born. To be born into stability, safety, good parents, etc.
Some guidance from Islam is that you need to be a God conscious person, ensuring your relationship with your Creator is good and then you seek a righteous woman who is also devoted to her Creator. Someone who is sincerely God conscious will be striving to be loyal, an to live righteously. So if a man himself is not righteous and if he likes women who's behaviour is ungodly then surely chances are higher of that leading to a bad outcome.
To determine compatibility you can also look at both families and recognize what possible unhealthy and unrighteous family dynamics exist and if it can be mitigated or not and whether your families are compatible in terms of values. Remember that each persons family is "their normal" and that's how cycles repeat in families if you don't learn to recognize what is good and what is bad.
So that is where devotion to The Creator comes in, He lays the foundation upon which values to live by in your household. Forget the mainstream an remember that The Man was put as the head of the household, to bear the responsibility of being the provider and protector so the mother does not end up being stressed out providing and can therefore nurture the children, take better care of the house and herself (women can still earn money through their own businesses if they want to, without the pressure an stress of being the main provider). It's important to note that when modernism destroyed the traditional family systems, it destroyed society. People are more depressed and lost then ever in spite of technology and more access to wealth because the real key to happiness is through following the guidelines set out by Allah through his revelations over time ending with the final testament, the Quran.
People are quick to judge! There are videos to prove that penuel has been trying to reach out to his baby mamas but because of egos some of his baby mamas has they couldn’t find common ground to see his kids like the others does
Reach out for what... He should've thought about that before making babies elsewhere. Hai nina...
But then again...We can't expect Bra god Pen to advocate for marriage that he wasn't raised in. All he knows from a dad is 17 siblings from different moms 😢😢😢😢
The one who wasn't there is the most to blame. The one who stayed is the one to be protected
@@nyashamahleko7007 The children are not to blame. And the mother's deserve credit for looking after the children on a DAILY BASIS. The nerve of this man thinking being a MEANWHILE father is cool. It's all good to pay school fees, but Who stays up at night when the child is ill? Who supervises the homework and provides advise on the daily? Who makes sure the house is in order?
Please ensure that you DO NOT follow this path that GodPen chose.
As much as he is intelligent, in this aspect he has found himself in an unfortunate lifetime rabbit hole of multiple families in multiple homes, in the name of procreation.
A family can be polygamous, but that entails all parties living in THE SAME HOME, not scattered homes.
As a father. Your influence has to go through the mother to your kids. That's just how influence works as childrendevelop. The general direction of influence in families is: Father -> Mother -> Children.
Yes it is practically impossible for your influence on your OWN children to bypass the mother, since the mother is the primary nurturer of your children. That is why it is practically impossible to have influence on your growing children while having it fragmented between many homes. This is the importance of having your children in the SAME HOME as the mother of your children.
PLEASE MAKE ONE HOME. ONE!! OR NONE!!!
Strongs bhuti wami 🥺💜💜🌸
Penuel siyabonga ngama lesson, people may take you for granted. Just because you have 5 baby mamas but as someone who's a 2k ngiyafunda.
DO A Vasectomy my brother But how are they toxic when you slept with them without protection..HIV and sexual transmitted disease.....
lol fuck that God made us the way he made us
Man, listen what's being said to understand. You're talking about HIV when he clearly States his kids were planned. Like he and the mothers had discussions before, only for them to switch up during pregnancy or after. You don't think those discussion involved and led to tests?
@@justkiingza3928 meaning if God made us the way He made us we shouldn't be responsible for our actions or be accountable as human beings.....
@@gwasheela4519 Maybe I don't understand English but where in the conversation did he say that the kids were planned cause He spoke about having access or only supposedly supporting 3 of those kids....🙏🙏🙏
@@justkiingza3928 meaning
Is about time this guy should go study law. He will be a good advocate.
He seems to have learnt a lot fighting for his children.
@@G-O425 Thank you. I will try lend my voice to activism more than the industry coz ppl within it tend to abide more than challenge it.
Law requires REASONING not FIGHTING. This one lacks the ability to REASON and I'm speaking as a lawyer.
Damn bra Pen had a nca background with Zulus Mom . Like grew up together similar interest yoh
Pen, I find it such a pity that ever since a bunch of negative haters came at you for why they think you're dead beat dad that you've since digressed from giving us the rich, informative political content that you used to and have since been explaining yourself to people who won't stop judging you anyway and also have their own shit that's probably even worse than what they were accusing you off. It's really sad how they got to you. Please come back! Please bring the content that we know and love you for because that's what your real followers are waiting for 😳😳😊. Please!
I agree with u. 💯💯
I'm one of the haters when he speaks about his baby mamas...but I still expect dope content that I followed him for...
You know is sad that you guys on UA-cam focus more on negative comments. I really don't think is necessary for you to explain yourself based on negative comments. Sorry my brother be strong
A deadbeat justifying his uselessness. How do you expect regular access when your kids are scattered all over the world and country ? Just man up
Credit to Bra Penuel 👍🏽for being open nd sharing. 😂 Because we know some of yall u even lie nd say that firstborn is your younger sibling kanti hie bundle of joy yakho ieyani mazi thethe😂
Childsupport payment doesn't over all the bills of the children.If the Woman should give the money to the Father ,who is paying for rent,food,chool item,clothing,child item and other things.Woman mostly have to pay on top of the chilld support
give the child to me and you pay me what i pay you
@@goodmenpictures3018 You wouldn't cope if the shoe was on the other foot, and that's a fact
@@lekis5975we are not all struggling in life bub! And now that's a fact!
One man's experience can be another man's lesson. I’m here to learn, so I don't have any opinions on your situation.
In retrospect, did you notice any personality traits or behaviors in the women who are currently uncooperative that the others (the ones allowing you access to your kids) did not exhibit? Or would you say you were completely caught off-guard? I'm asking because, from what I gather, the lesson I'm taking from this is the importance of thoroughly vetting someone before committing. Relationships end, and I wonder if there's a way to identify whether someone will be vindictive if that happens.
You might be tempted to absolve yourself by saying there was no way to know. But please think it through - I don't wanna have to think that I'll always be at the mercy of someone's whim. That may just put me off any kind of relationship honestly 😅
Edit: I posted this after seeing first vid but before watching this one and you answered my question: People lie: and people change; we're all our parent's kids - is what I'm getting. And all I can say is "Damn, knew her for 20 years and Shawty still pulled a fast one on you😂😂😂😂. Even NASA with their deep space telescopes couldn't see that one coming"
There is a way to know brother but it also takes you to be in a heathy state of mind as well. Some guidance from Islam is that you need to be a God conscious person, ensuring your relationship with your Creator is good and then you seek a righteous woman who is also devoted to her Creator. Someone who is sincerely God conscious will be striving to be loyal, an to live righteously. So if a man himself is not righteous and if he likes women who's behaviour is ungodly then surely chances are higher of that leading to a bad outcome.
To determine compatibility you can also look at both families and recognize what possible unhealthy and unrighteous family dynamics exist and if it can be mitigated or not and whether your families are compatible in terms of values. Remember my brother that each persons family is "their normal" and that's how cycles repeat in families if you don't learn to recognize what is good and what is bad.
So that is where devotion to The Creator comes in, He lays the foundation upon which values to live by in your household. Forget the mainstream an remember that The Man was put as the head of the household, to be the main provider an protector so the mother does not end up being stressed out providing and can therefore take care of the children, the house and herself. Pen needs to repent to The Creator for calling himself God, I really pray that he does because he seems genuine but Allah knows best what Pen's heart conceals.
Anyone who wants serenity in their life needs to understand that contentment comes from having a good relationship with our Creator Allah, The Sustainer, The Only One worthy of worship upon whom everything and everyone is dependent on, The One who Decrees and is in Control of what happens to us to teach us lessons and to guide us. A blessed life is not having money and wealth but it's being satisfied with the life you have by practising grateful ness for the blessings we have and being patient with any difficulties of life until it passes because Allah says in the Quran "So, surely with hardship comes ease." 94:6 "Surely with ˹that˺ hardship comes ˹more˺ ease. " 94:7.
Another important thought for the youth to keep in mind is that when a man decides to not be married to a woman before having a child with her, the consequence is that he is unconsciously signing up to be a part time father. To be a full time father you need to start by finding a good wife as priority and then getting married before conceiving a child, in order to be fully present for the child, as a child's rights over it's parents is more than financial stability but it's time, it's effort, it's being present through the daily grind and not just weekends and holidays.
Ubaba ka boy 🤣🤣🤣
I fully support that decision, these kids will grow up and know the truth....keep strong and continue to be the best father to your other children
do people really listen to the whole hour just asking?
I doubt, some of these comments are not make sure😂. These are real social issues; listen, analyse and comment like a concerned member of society.
@@5ynboss I understand but the video is long man
oh Maan Penuel,u overly explain yourself ngoku ,we understood the sensible masses understood .Now u r explaining to ppl who decided a long time ago that they choose to have a pre-conceived perception about you .Yibambe bhuti pheza Tata.❤
2 out of 5 bms are goofballs, respectfully.
This is just dumb
I get that you are frustrated, but honestly, you created this situation. Now, you are justifying child abandonment and violence towards women. You yourself are a toxic baby daddy, I mean 7 kids by 5 different women?? The courts didn't fail you. You failed yourself, and now you are failing your children. You should be seeking advice not giving it because abandoning your kids will never be a solution.
He is delusional. Absolute delusion.
How is he a toxic baby daddy? I'm asking sincerely.
He's spent years talking about trying to get access to his children that were made consentually and intentionally with all the women?
How is he toxic?
@@zwaks.mthimkhulu He had a good job, but he quit it to chase his dream. He gives the baby mamas whatever he can, when he can. Some of the baby mamas are ambitious for themselves and their children they work hard to have a certain lifestyle, so whatever little he gives, doesn't help much, subsequently the mother's have to move heaven and earth to bridge the gap to ensure, the children have what they need.
@@zwaks.mthimkhulu go have children with five women and see how that turns out for you and the humans you bring to this world
At least my YT premium will pay you 50c for this video. please save it so that you can send it to your 3 kids after they are 18
Another south african man abandoned his kids
He literally explained how and why he came to this decision, also how he is not completely abandoning them 🤦🏾♂️
Go to school.
We can't not judge Black coffee, he had a wife when he had those kids.
Penuel, being a deadbeat, was not on my 2024 bingo card.
What is a man?