I’ve seen a lot of people say Brett and Tiff had no conflict but I think it’s great that you pointed out that they had many situations that could have created conflict but they navigated them so carefully and beautifully and did not allow them to escalate. A sign of a very mature, healthy and emotionally intelligent couple. I absolutely love them.
The biggest takeaway for me from the suit tailoring incident was how patient and respectful Brett was with the seamstress. The way folks treat service workers says everything about them. He was firm, but polite and understanding. A good egg all round.
On a podcast, Marshall said that Tiffany and Brett had a big storyline around her moving to Portland. But we did not see any of that because Brett handled it correctly. I wish Netflix would see that people also want to show up for healthy couple goals...not just the drama! Can't wait for your take on this though!!
I have faith they will! ESPECIALLY after all the backlash re: Vanessa and not holding the most toxic cast members accountable while going hard on the decent humans
DITTO! i would LOVE to see the green flags + healthy relationships, even more than the drama + red flags, TBH. iDK if that makes me an anomaly or in the minority but it's good to see i'm not alone in this. 😊
YESS!! It was specifically shown that Kwame didn’t live in Seattle and would need to move, he even made a comment about how he can’t go visit when he was staying with Chelsea during filming. On the other hand we never even knew that Brett lived in Portland also! He was commuting to see Tiffany and never once complained or even mentioned it. Nor did Tiffany make a big deal about moving to Portland for him. Green flags!!
It's the way that I didn't even realize that they had the same big distance to move as Kwame and Chelsea. It was like that never truly got addressed the way Kwame needed but with Tiffany and Brett it was so smooth. I wish we saw more of the discussion.
This Green Flags Video was EVERYTHING and needed so people can understand healthy love really does exist and it’s a beautiful thing when you find the one to experience it with 😍
It really helps me learn communication skills when you review other people's relationships and you give examples of what could have been said instead. Please do some more like these!!
The thing with the proposal clothes is that everyone does their proposals on the last day so everyone gets dressed up. The edits make it look like the couples get engaged on different days but it's all on the same day for every couple
@@katyclemens yes me too! Was so beautiful to see a handsome, ambitious, thoughtful and intentional black man choose and cherish a gorgeous, ambitious, kind and caring black woman. 🤎
I think Brett is entitled to the pants that he wants on his wedding day! I love that he was proactive about it instead of just reacting and taking it out on others. Thank you so much for this video. It has helped give me some perspective on my new relationship.
@@janine3664 I thought it was a reflection of how much he wanted that day to be perfect and therefore how important marrying Tiffany was to him. I was like, “Oh he really loves this woman.”
When I first saw the scene where he was comforting her, I said to my roommate “every healthy couple planning a wedding hit a point where they want to elope” 😂 I never for a second thought she didn’t want to marry Brett, just that she was ready to run to vegas and say hey y’all we did it already, cancel the wedding
Honestly I thought it was funny how the show kept trying to take the smallest things they said totally out of context to make it look like they were going to break up in the next episode, when after like day two we knew that wasn't going to happen and they were just cherrypicking phrases. :)
What was so mature and confident is that he also did not take it as she does not want to marry me. With a red flagged couple, the scenario would have gone quite differently.
Wow, to watch and also review how Brett was never, turned off or intimidated by Tiffany’s ambition and persistence, and never felt threatened by her success, because he was so secure in his own, was such a huge validation, and gives me a lot of hope for meeting another partner like that!!
I completely agree with Brett’s reaction for his pants not fitting!! I don’t think it’s a small thing at all. It’s his wedding day. If it was a bride whose dress didn’t fit then we wouldn’t be wondering why she was upset. Especially if it’s someone who usually puts effort into her appearance only to not look her best on the biggest day of her life. That was my favorite scene with Brett and Tiffany too! What we didn’t see that Brett shared later was that he cheered her up by asking her if he can take pictures of her as a professional photographer, and he printed them out for her later (which we did see). It was his first time seeing his work printed and framed. I really think that added to the scene and the way he handled everything.
@ absolutely!! They couldn’t find any more drama for the couple. Also they completely left out that Brett lived in Portland. We saw kwame lived there since it was an ongoing conflict in his relationship with Chelsea. But we didn’t find out until the reunion that Brett and Tiffany also had to deal with the same situation of them living so far apart from each other during filming and one of them having to decide to move to another city.
@@StephAnya Since you're a marriage AND family therapist and you said recently that you'd like new video ideas that aren't exclusively surrounding movies and tv, I would love to see you do complex breakdowns of familial relationships more! Because those are always some of the hardest to tackle during arguments and in fights bc there's soooo much backstory and history to every interaction. I know you're a couples therapist as well, so I completely understand that most of your breakdowns have been around that topic, but again, videos surrounding mother-daughter relationships, toxic sibling dynamics, father-son, etc would be SO great and so helpful! Breaking down familial patterns and ways we have of interacting with our family as adults-- which can be rooted in our childhood-- is so hard but so rewarding, so I'd truly love to see you do a series on that! I know you don't talk much about your own family (I don't even know if you have siblings, actually! lol) but I think everyone can relate to complex dynamics amongst family members, especially because they are some of our first exposure to relationships and how to communicate properly (or poorly, if the dynamic was unhealthy.) I think there's soooo much to be said about what even constitutes a family (single parent household; adopted family; two person household; absent parent; alcoholic parent; abusive older sibling; coddled "favorite" child; etc.) that you could even make an entire series on the topic of family dynamics! [Even defining different parenting styles and what they mean, etc.] So yeah, all this to say I'd love to see videos on different ways of resolving conflicts between parent and child as adults! What are healthy ways to communicate when there is a lot of hurt and trauma on both sides; how to maturely move on from the past whilst still holding our parents accountable as adults? I think the idea of being responsible for our present self and NOT blaming our parents for "how we turned out" is so important, but there are so many instances where it's hard to bite our tongues and where we are just dying to make them understand how they've discarded us in the past... Again, it's often sooooo much more tricky than relationship dynamics, since we don't usually choose our family. But how do we let go of that pain if we still want to maintain a healthy relationship with them? I'm also curious as to whether as a LMFT you ever also saw families? I know you've been a couples therapist, but have you also ever met with parent-child, or sibling duos for conflict resolution and communication issues? Or exclusively couples? Sorry if this message is a bit intrusive and too long lol, just super curious bc I think you're such an incredible therapist with such good insight! But I completely understand if you can't/don't want to answer. I know these can be private questions.
@@StephAnya I found that little moment where you analysed Bliss's relationship with her dad and how she interacts with him as an adult and manages difficult (and awkward) conversations with him so incredibly insightful that it just made me think so much about how helpful it would be to see you make a full blown series out of breaking down and analyzing familial conflict and communication issues! (Kind of like how you've done with couples all this time.) Again, I know family dynamics are waaaaaay more complex and heavy and hard to break down bc of the childhood history they're rooted in, but still! Maybe even taking famous tv/film moments and breaking them down like you did in your viral videos could work? Idk! Just an idea. [Ok I'll shut up for real now lol sorry for the essay!! Love you!]
They finally proved that healthy couples can be entertaining. While I don’t watch the show, I love the commentaries on it. Based on this one, I like how this love at first sight done right or insta love. What makes this work is their values, their beliefs, and ideals are put on the table right away. The possible deal breakers are laid out front and I can see how this leads to feeling love for the other person in a short period of time. My favorite part of this video is communication. Simple communication is not that difficult. If these two were a romantic comedy novel, I would not put it down. This video made me love them.
This video was exactly what I needed. I’m going through a breakup and I was questioning my decision, but this just reassured me that being respected and emotionally supported is not an irrational expectation. They are my favorite couple for sure🥰
I didn’t think the pants thing was that big of a deal. I could tell that Brett was a very meticulous and detail oriented person. He wanted to look nice. I was truly obsessed with Brett and Tiffany throughout the entire process! They always were so supportive of one another. Their communication was amazing, and I loved how open they both were! 😊
Brett's pants not a red flag. I got married last year and there's so many fittings before wedding day. I started like 4 months before wedding with first fitting. Then I had 2 more fitting after that. My husband went in a month before day of wedding. Guys and girl do fittings differently so that's what I thought. I've also been hearing podcast Out of The Pods and the talk about how producers do things to stir things up. This is probable intentional to get something 'drama' out of this very beautiful love story. As always thanks for your dissection , I love your input, specially therapy terms.
24:35 oof yes! Giving your partner the benefit of the doubt when you know “your partner loves you, wants the best for you, and wants a future with you”…this is a really good reminder lesson for me right now, as I am in the beginning stages of a relationship and this month have realized I was over depending on my previous bad experiences/relationships leading to bias that negatively affects this new one. But this is a good reminder to help me reset and feel ok about letting go of the defenses enough to let someone new and good in.
This is the third time your breakdowns has helped me understand some confusion and frustration I have with my family relationships. Thank you thank you for your videos!
Since Stephanie is a marriage AND family therapist, I would love to see her do complex breakdowns of familial relationships more! Because those are always some of the hardest to tackle during arguments and in fights bc there's soooo much backstory and history to every interaction. I know she's been a couples therapist as well, so I completely understand that most of her breakdowns have been around them, but again, videos surrounding mother-daughter relationships, toxic sibling dynamics, father-son, etc would be SO great and so helpful! Breaking down familial patterns and ways we have of interacting with our family as adults-- which can be rooted in our childhood-- is so hard but so rewarding, so I'd truly love to see her do a series on that!
At the 25:02 mark, oh my goodness. Me and my partner just ran into this issue. He was teasing me about some things and it became like a long convo and eventually an argument. I needed to hear what you said just then. It confirmed what he had already said to reassure me: “i love you. And I’m serious about us. I wouldn’t be making long term plans with you if i wasn’t. My intention is never to hurt you. We’re on the same team”. He says that last part a lot 🥹i love himmmm
Thank you for this video. I remember crying on how beautiful the story is between those two. Green flags and healthy relationship examples are sooooo important. Tiffany and Brett are the greatest that has been this show and any other dating shows. It’s so refreshing to see them ❤
I was afraid Brett could be the SK of this season: the guy who knows how to say exactly the right things in the right moments only to let you fall from the highest point. But this couple where really knowing and loving each other with each conversation 🥺💜
I can’t wait to see all different types of content from you BUT can we please get a season 1 LIB breakdown in there as well! Or at least Lauren and Cameron ❤ Love your videos
I love Brett and Tiffany. I’d like to see you review season one of love is blind. Also maybe you could do a video on how to move on after the death of a significant other in a healthy way .
Really appreciated this! I totally get you thinking Tiffany seemed to good to be true. I had similar thoughts about both of them and their relationship. But it just goes to show that we’re fed so much drama, that the healthy, happy and unproblematic people often go unnoticed. Thanks for putting the spotlight on something positive!
I was just discussing in my last therapy session how hard is it to find role models for healthy relationships and this video is exactly what I needed. Thanks ❤
I am right there with you - I want to see more older candidates on the show and more of these healthy relationships so people can see real people in real healthy relationships and how they navigate those. The show has to have some drama which is fine, but I’m here for the wholesome side that we see in these mature, happy couples ❤
Thank you for this! This couple was a breath of fresh air. And your assessments are always so insightful. Could we have more videos like this? With healthy relationships and ways to maintain despite various challenges (distance, children, different levels of wealth, sickness, etc).
Steph! Love your relationship breakdowns! Please do “The Ultimatum-Queer Love” next! I would love to hear your thoughts about the lesbian couples on that show. It was fascinating to watch both partners in a couple being so expressive about their emotions and verbalizing their feelings! That show was excellent!
I thought Brett had spent so much time being a strong rock for Tiffany that he hadn’t processed his own nerves and anxiety. He didn’t have as much control over the wedding planning as he might have liked given the process by which he met his wife and I think when the one thing he was able to choose, his tuxedo, didn’t fit correctly all of the stress caught up with him and overflowed
Netflix messed up they should have just put Brett and Tiff on our screen from the fist second to the last. Show us how to build and have healthy relationships - beautiful mahn
I didn't feel Brett's upset regarding his slacks was a red flag. He is definitely particular about his clothes and fit and that is Ok. His brother's presentation is quite different and that is ok as well. We all have "that thing" that we are a little extra about. And Tiffany recognizes that he is a little BOO-ZHEE and teases him about it. Great Review!
Steph! Please keep the nerd knowledge coming, I love the way you explain concepts. The detail, examples and references are Great! You are both entertaining and educational and seem wise beyond your years.
They are ABSOLUTELY my fav couple of all time from LIB!!! It is so so refreshing to see a Black love story that is healthy and showcases how to go about relationship the right way. Im rooting for them!!!
I LOVED seeing this. It makes me tear up when I see examples of truly healthy relationships and conflict. I think a lot of us relate to not having those examples growing up. I would love to see some content on how not to over-intellectualise our emotions, and how to just sit and feel them in the moment. You mentioned in the video how we have a tendency to want to move past or 'fix' our emotions in the moment, rather than just allowing ourselves to FEEL. Thanks for all your hard work!
This is my absolute favorite analysis so far! It is so nice to see and examine a beautiful, healthy relationship! I look forward to every one of these videos 💗 I don't watch the show, and don't want to. I love how you break it down and tell the couples' story. I feel like we are good friends discussing your other friends' drama lol. Thank you Steph for your thoughts and genuine care for people 💗🌸
I learned a lot here and noticed some of my own patterns. Appreciate your take and experience with how couples misinterpret things. It's hard to not take things personally sometimes because my mind moves so fast, but my partner and I are working on assuming best intent with each other. Assume he is coming to me with love and care and honesty. These two do that, their relationship was my fave since season one.
The way I perceived the pants situation is that he is a go getter, he doesn't sit and feel like the victim and feel helpless, he act. He solves the problem. I like that and I think that is a very reassuring quality to have in a partner.
This just warms my heart 💚✨We can learn so much from green flags. It’s so easy to get caught up in red flags and honestly the drama of shows like this, but watching this video is so beautiful and a breath of fresh air💚 Love this video and couple!
OMG! These 2. I have no words. I love their love. They are so perfect for each other. I am rooting for their love to last forever. Wow! It was a joy watching them. Brett, you are amazing period. Tiff, so nurturing for sure. I am still in awe! My favourite couple ever! Both their dad's said they wil make it and they will. I am 49 but iyoh, I learnt so much about pure love from these 2. Thank you Brett and Tiff. May God bless your union.
Just wanna say I love your channel!! Your voice is soothing and your relationship break downs are spot on. I’m game to watch anything you make but a movie relationship I’d love covered is eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
I LOVE your videos and have been watching them faithfully for the past few months. I would really appreciate additional videos about behavioral addictions (food, sex, love, etc) and adult ADHD, respectively. Can’t wait to see what you come out with next!
I've loved watching this series. Psychology is a passion of mine, and even though counseling isn't typically the field I'm most drawn to studying (I'm a huge fan of going to therapy), being able to analyze relationships with specific models so clearly is invaluable. Please continue this series with other shows, I need more of this content!!
What a beautiful couple! They seemed genuine and kind, inside and out. Thanks for sharing your insight on both healthy and toxic relationship dynamics! Love hearing your insight on navigating conflict and showing support for others. Thank you for all you do. 😊
This was an AMAZING video I love this break down of a healthy relationship! This analysis literally made me tear up to see this amazing communication, this was absolutely beautiful. Please do more analysis of HEALTHY relationships and communication tips. I loved this video. 💖☺️
I absolutely love your breakdowns from LIB and this is a favourite looking back on Tiffany and Brett's journey on the show. Seeing their communication and how they really held space for each other was so refreshing and beautiful - got me taking notes for my own communication work hahah. Absolutely rooting for them forever
I love to see you geeking out in this video from a therapist perspective on how good they communicate, this is actually one of your most helpful videos so far imo because it's so nice to see a good example in real life of people making things work
After seeing soooo many therapist videos based on LIB or ultimatum. Your videos are still my favourite! The videos are well-made and you are so articulate, easy to listen to. Just wanna show some support here! Keep up the good work!!
I resonated with the part about it being too good to be true. I was thinking this relationship was too perfect, they fit so well. But I’m so happy for them❤️🔥
I've watched all of your love is blind videos, and I'm so glad I watched this one last. They're so wholesome and mature. I could literally cry. You did great coverage on all of the couples!
It was beautiful watching Brett and Tiffany's love story on the show. Your videos are awesome because there's always an explanation and lesson that comes along with your review of the couples. As someone who has benefited from therapy and is intrigued by human behavior - your videos are both fun and informative. Brett and Tiffany's story is refreshing because it's not often we see healthy relationships develop on reality tv.
I found your chanel after a video showed up regarding LIB season 5 and I am so happy it did. I love, love, love the Browns and I for one think having your partner, soul mate and best friend be the same person is 100 percent the best feeling in the world.
Although they may not have been the most "exciting" couple to watch if you love the drama, Brett and Tiff really made this whole season of LIB for me. I absolutely loved them!
I smiled throughout this entire video. It was such a blessing to see Dr. Steph be able to enjoy a couple from one of these shows instead of having to point out all the red flags and issues so she could teach us how to have healthier and stronger relationships. She got to point out all the RIGHT things to do because it was demonstrated by Brett & Tiffany. And the glow in Dr. Steph's eyes as she did was beautiful to see!!! 🤗🥰🤗🤗
I don't even watch this show but I saw a suggested video with green flags. So much content is about red flags & how to recognise them but I'm loving this green flag thing. I loved this video. Subscribing because yes to all you said in this video & communication.
I love, love your channel, I look forward to all of your breakdowns. So many people are doing reviews and breakdowns but yours is by the far the best, the smartest. You speak so well I listen to every word. Netflix needs to hire you to host Love is Blind
I’d loveee if you did a series breaking down the different relationship dynamics of classic romance movies. I immediately think of Anne Hathaway’s movie “One Day” and how her one sided to on again off again tumultuous relationship dynamic played out. I’d love to hear your analysis of movies like that!
This video was everythingggg😮💨👏🏽 being able to visually see greens flags & healthy ways to communicate definitely helped me map out my emotional responses and what I can work on to do better💕
I love this video. I think more therapists should talk about and show examples of green flags/healthy relationships. This is definitely a reminder to stay focused on my goals and check myself on displacement.
About them always being dressed up for the proposal - apparently all proposals happen on the same day. So they know what the last day is and to dress up. Lauren and Cameron said even theirs occurred on Day 10 like everyone else but the show just cut it to make it look like he proposed immediately.
I would love more videos of green flags My partner and I have recently gone through some traumatizing experiences resulting in myself in therapy for PTSD and we are both invested in our couples therapy, which we have been involved in together for about a month. Something I caught on to in this video was when you said Brett was falling into an old dynamic that he's had in the past with his brother. I feel that myself and my partner tend to do that when we are stressed! My partner reminds me a lot of Brett
Steph, I have been binge watching so many of your videos since I discovered your channel this week. Your analyses are not only grounded in evidence from the field but you are also thoughtful in your application of it to these scenarios and the individual and collective situations. You have given me so much clarity and a lot to reflect on in terms of not only the types of relationships we see in pop culture but also on my own personal relationships as well. I am truly just in awe and admire your analyses so much!! With that being said I would LOVE LOVE LOVE if you could review season 2 of the ultimatum. I am a queer woman and would love to see this representation! Thank you so much for all of your eye opening videos ❤️❤️❤️
I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts on „Love is Blind Japan“. I felt like it was such a novel experience to watch those couples in- and outside of the pods and even though the first (and unfortunately only season, as far as i know) has aired years ago, some of the couples are still going strong with the life partner that they even built a family with. Makes me so happy to see them thrive. Your personal and professional perspective would be such an enrichment. Thank you so so much for the effort you put into creating all this amazing content ♥️
I love videos reacting to situations since it helps me learn so much more about how to handle my situations. It's different when you're just listening to someone talk about how to go about certain feelings versus seeing an example and having it explained if that makes sense. Anyways I love your content so much, thanks!
I loved these two so much. They seemed so connected to each other and so committed. It was honestly very funny to even include Brett freaking out about his pants, because I think that was Netflix trying to manufacture a little bit of drama with this couple. And a man being particular about their appearance is a good thing as long as they are not hypercritical of others, which doesn’t seem to be a Brett problem. I think Tiffany also texted Brett about Jackie’s absence because she wanted Marshall to know and knew Brett could break it to him respectfully
I love when you explained about conflict and about how quickly you have conflict and then you can get over it my family that I live with my mom and my dad you know they my dad especially has talked to me about that as he is helping me you no understand life as an adult even as a thirty-six-year-old adult but he is you know helping me and and he sometimes explains that that how quickly you know they have a fight but that how quickly they can get over it so I loved how you were
Question, what if you are dating with intention but also go with the flow of if that person is right for you. Basically, you do want a relationship but you don’t know if you want it the person you are dating. In my dating experience there are usually two extremes: people who are ready to be committed quickly and then people who aren’t looking for anything serious at all. I find I fall in the middle. I do want a relationship, if that’s what naturally happens but people are express their desire for a relationship on the date scare me.
I was so glad they got past that simple misunderstanding of her falling asleep. I could tell she’s a heavy sleeper bc I am so the opposite, I’d wake up instantly if someone were trying to get my attention. They communicated about this so well, and it was a thing of the past.
Oh, thanks for saying that bit about people who cry when other people are crying… I be crying and I used to really shame myself for it when I was younger 😂 my emotions live besides my eyes
@StephAnya, 3 things: 1) I'm a relatively new viewer of your content and you are terrific. Clearly knowledgeable, well educated in your field, and a lovely bedside manner; 2) I enjoy the love stories MUCH more than the conflict and the train wrecks so thank you so much for doing a green flag video. I was so taken with Brett & Tiffany, with their friends, their families, everything. Thank you for doing an analysis of what good looks like, and finally; 3) would you please do a green flag analysis of Lauren & Cameron from season one? They were another mature couple who navigated the LIB experience beautifully AND they had an added element of navigating an interracial relationship. Would love to get your analysis of their journey, including how they managed the family and friend relationships. Some real nuggets in there, too.
I’ve seen a lot of people say Brett and Tiff had no conflict but I think it’s great that you pointed out that they had many situations that could have created conflict but they navigated them so carefully and beautifully and did not allow them to escalate. A sign of a very mature, healthy and emotionally intelligent couple. I absolutely love them.
Yes, this was done so well! I didn't even realize how many potential issues they sidestepped!
The biggest takeaway for me from the suit tailoring incident was how patient and respectful Brett was with the seamstress. The way folks treat service workers says everything about them. He was firm, but polite and understanding. A good egg all round.
This!
What exactly is the science behind this? Rich people treat service people like garbage all the time, yet everyone respects rich people.
@@MC-mh2ju Poor people also treat service people like shit all the time, what's your point?
How u treat people that most people feel can't effect their day to day life shows how genuine they are @@MC-mh2ju
@@MC-mh2ju "everyone respects rich people" is nasty work
On a podcast, Marshall said that Tiffany and Brett had a big storyline around her moving to Portland. But we did not see any of that because Brett handled it correctly. I wish Netflix would see that people also want to show up for healthy couple goals...not just the drama!
Can't wait for your take on this though!!
I have faith they will! ESPECIALLY after all the backlash re: Vanessa and not holding the most toxic cast members accountable while going hard on the decent humans
DITTO! i would LOVE to see the green flags + healthy relationships, even more than the drama + red flags, TBH.
iDK if that makes me an anomaly or in the minority but it's good to see i'm not alone in this. 😊
YESS!! It was specifically shown that Kwame didn’t live in Seattle and would need to move, he even made a comment about how he can’t go visit when he was staying with Chelsea during filming. On the other hand we never even knew that Brett lived in Portland also! He was commuting to see Tiffany and never once complained or even mentioned it. Nor did Tiffany make a big deal about moving to Portland for him. Green flags!!
It's the way that I didn't even realize that they had the same big distance to move as Kwame and Chelsea. It was like that never truly got addressed the way Kwame needed but with Tiffany and Brett it was so smooth. I wish we saw more of the discussion.
@@RoyalRumBull*narrator voice* they would not, in fact, end up doing that
This Green Flags Video was EVERYTHING and needed so people can understand healthy love really does exist and it’s a beautiful thing when you find the one to experience it with 😍
So glad that you enjoyed it! And congratulations on your marriage!
I second this! It’s so great to see what is good!
@@StephAnya aww thank you 😊
"The things we're teased for often become our greatest successes." You could save a generation with that line
So true!!! I had a lot of epiphanies
I started laughing when you said "There Goes Tiffany sniffing a candle that's not even lit" 😂
That is me too 🤣
😂😂😂 that part had me cracking me up
It really helps me learn communication skills when you review other people's relationships and you give examples of what could have been said instead. Please do some more like these!!
I absolutely learned how and what it looks like to give validation and put it right into practice. Steph is out here changing lives for the better 🙌🏾
The thing with the proposal clothes is that everyone does their proposals on the last day so everyone gets dressed up. The edits make it look like the couples get engaged on different days but it's all on the same day for every couple
The most beautiful black love. I fell in love with them so quickly.
Brett and Tiffany are absolutely beautiful. But there's another black couple that ranks higher than Brett & Tiffany for me, Amani and Woody for MAFS.
THIS!! 😍🤩 🖤🤎✊🏾🖤 love to see it!
I loved when he specifically mentioned with his friends that her being a Black woman was important to him. :)
@@katyclemens yes me too! Was so beautiful to see a handsome, ambitious, thoughtful and intentional black man choose and cherish a gorgeous, ambitious, kind and caring black woman. 🤎
Me too. Seeing healthy black couples, especially black men that love black women is important.
I think Brett is entitled to the pants that he wants on his wedding day! I love that he was proactive about it instead of just reacting and taking it out on others.
Thank you so much for this video. It has helped give me some perspective on my new relationship.
Agreed! I want a man who cares to look his best on our wedding day. Who wouldn't?
and even though he may have been stressed about it, he was still very nice and respectful to the tailor!
@@janine3664 I thought it was a reflection of how much he wanted that day to be perfect and therefore how important marrying Tiffany was to him. I was like, “Oh he really loves this woman.”
When I first saw the scene where he was comforting her, I said to my roommate “every healthy couple planning a wedding hit a point where they want to elope” 😂 I never for a second thought she didn’t want to marry Brett, just that she was ready to run to vegas and say hey y’all we did it already, cancel the wedding
Honestly I thought it was funny how the show kept trying to take the smallest things they said totally out of context to make it look like they were going to break up in the next episode, when after like day two we knew that wasn't going to happen and they were just cherrypicking phrases. :)
Love that
What was so mature and confident is that he also did not take it as she does not want to marry me. With a red flagged couple, the scenario would have gone quite differently.
Omg we definitely hit that point w/ wanting to elope lol … wedding stress is real 🤣
Wow, to watch and also review how Brett was never, turned off or intimidated by Tiffany’s ambition and persistence, and never felt threatened by her success, because he was so secure in his own, was such a huge validation, and gives me a lot of hope for meeting another partner like that!!
Love this.. The culture needs more Brett & Tiffany 💚
I completely agree with Brett’s reaction for his pants not fitting!! I don’t think it’s a small thing at all. It’s his wedding day. If it was a bride whose dress didn’t fit then we wouldn’t be wondering why she was upset. Especially if it’s someone who usually puts effort into her appearance only to not look her best on the biggest day of her life.
That was my favorite scene with Brett and Tiffany too! What we didn’t see that Brett shared later was that he cheered her up by asking her if he can take pictures of her as a professional photographer, and he printed them out for her later (which we did see). It was his first time seeing his work printed and framed. I really think that added to the scene and the way he handled everything.
I don’t even fully believe the producers didn’t do that on purpose to make Brett look bad because of how sweet he was
@ absolutely!! They couldn’t find any more drama for the couple. Also they completely left out that Brett lived in Portland. We saw kwame lived there since it was an ongoing conflict in his relationship with Chelsea. But we didn’t find out until the reunion that Brett and Tiffany also had to deal with the same situation of them living so far apart from each other during filming and one of them having to decide to move to another city.
Earlier today I was like “wait, Steph hasn’t posted Tiffany and Brett yet? Hope she does soon!” And here we are 😍
Here we are! Thanks for being patient 🫶🏽
Of course! Thank you for your making this content for us!
@@StephAnya Since you're a marriage AND family therapist and you said recently that you'd like new video ideas that aren't exclusively surrounding movies and tv, I would love to see you do complex breakdowns of familial relationships more! Because those are always some of the hardest to tackle during arguments and in fights bc there's soooo much backstory and history to every interaction.
I know you're a couples therapist as well, so I completely understand that most of your breakdowns have been around that topic, but again, videos surrounding mother-daughter relationships, toxic sibling dynamics, father-son, etc would be SO great and so helpful! Breaking down familial patterns and ways we have of interacting with our family as adults-- which can be rooted in our childhood-- is so hard but so rewarding, so I'd truly love to see you do a series on that!
I know you don't talk much about your own family (I don't even know if you have siblings, actually! lol) but I think everyone can relate to complex dynamics amongst family members, especially because they are some of our first exposure to relationships and how to communicate properly (or poorly, if the dynamic was unhealthy.) I think there's soooo much to be said about what even constitutes a family (single parent household; adopted family; two person household; absent parent; alcoholic parent; abusive older sibling; coddled "favorite" child; etc.) that you could even make an entire series on the topic of family dynamics! [Even defining different parenting styles and what they mean, etc.]
So yeah, all this to say I'd love to see videos on different ways of resolving conflicts between parent and child as adults! What are healthy ways to communicate when there is a lot of hurt and trauma on both sides; how to maturely move on from the past whilst still holding our parents accountable as adults? I think the idea of being responsible for our present self and NOT blaming our parents for "how we turned out" is so important, but there are so many instances where it's hard to bite our tongues and where we are just dying to make them understand how they've discarded us in the past... Again, it's often sooooo much more tricky than relationship dynamics, since we don't usually choose our family. But how do we let go of that pain if we still want to maintain a healthy relationship with them?
I'm also curious as to whether as a LMFT you ever also saw families? I know you've been a couples therapist, but have you also ever met with parent-child, or sibling duos for conflict resolution and communication issues? Or exclusively couples? Sorry if this message is a bit intrusive and too long lol, just super curious bc I think you're such an incredible therapist with such good insight! But I completely understand if you can't/don't want to answer. I know these can be private questions.
@@StephAnya I found that little moment where you analysed Bliss's relationship with her dad and how she interacts with him as an adult and manages difficult (and awkward) conversations with him so incredibly insightful that it just made me think so much about how helpful it would be to see you make a full blown series out of breaking down and analyzing familial conflict and communication issues! (Kind of like how you've done with couples all this time.) Again, I know family dynamics are waaaaaay more complex and heavy and hard to break down bc of the childhood history they're rooted in, but still! Maybe even taking famous tv/film moments and breaking them down like you did in your viral videos could work? Idk! Just an idea. [Ok I'll shut up for real now lol sorry for the essay!! Love you!]
I LOOOVVVED Tiffany's friends. She is so sweet, her and Brett are so emotionally mature. Love to see it!💚
They finally proved that healthy couples can be entertaining.
While I don’t watch the show, I love the commentaries on it.
Based on this one, I like how this love at first sight done right or insta love.
What makes this work is their values, their beliefs, and ideals are put on the table right away. The possible deal breakers are laid out front and I can see how this leads to feeling love for the other person in a short period of time.
My favorite part of this video is communication. Simple communication is not that difficult.
If these two were a romantic comedy novel, I would not put it down.
This video made me love them.
This video was exactly what I needed. I’m going through a breakup and I was questioning my decision, but this just reassured me that being respected and emotionally supported is not an irrational expectation. They are my favorite couple for sure🥰
I didn’t think the pants thing was that big of a deal. I could tell that Brett was a very meticulous and detail oriented person. He wanted to look nice. I was truly obsessed with Brett and Tiffany throughout the entire process! They always were so supportive of one another. Their communication was amazing, and I loved how open they both were! 😊
Brett's pants not a red flag. I got married last year and there's so many fittings before wedding day. I started like 4 months before wedding with first fitting. Then I had 2 more fitting after that. My husband went in a month before day of wedding. Guys and girl do fittings differently so that's what I thought. I've also been hearing podcast Out of The Pods and the talk about how producers do things to stir things up. This is probable intentional to get something 'drama' out of this very beautiful love story. As always thanks for your dissection , I love your input, specially therapy terms.
24:35 oof yes! Giving your partner the benefit of the doubt when you know “your partner loves you, wants the best for you, and wants a future with you”…this is a really good reminder lesson for me right now, as I am in the beginning stages of a relationship and this month have realized I was over depending on my previous bad experiences/relationships leading to bias that negatively affects this new one. But this is a good reminder to help me reset and feel ok about letting go of the defenses enough to let someone new and good in.
So glad that part resonated with you!
I needed this lesson too, I feel you!
This is the third time your breakdowns has helped me understand some confusion and frustration I have with my family relationships. Thank you thank you for your videos!
Since Stephanie is a marriage AND family therapist, I would love to see her do complex breakdowns of familial relationships more! Because those are always some of the hardest to tackle during arguments and in fights bc there's soooo much backstory and history to every interaction. I know she's been a couples therapist as well, so I completely understand that most of her breakdowns have been around them, but again, videos surrounding mother-daughter relationships, toxic sibling dynamics, father-son, etc would be SO great and so helpful! Breaking down familial patterns and ways we have of interacting with our family as adults-- which can be rooted in our childhood-- is so hard but so rewarding, so I'd truly love to see her do a series on that!
At the 25:02 mark, oh my goodness. Me and my partner just ran into this issue. He was teasing me about some things and it became like a long convo and eventually an argument. I needed to hear what you said just then. It confirmed what he had already said to reassure me: “i love you. And I’m serious about us. I wouldn’t be making long term plans with you if i wasn’t. My intention is never to hurt you. We’re on the same team”. He says that last part a lot 🥹i love himmmm
Omgg 🥹🙏🏾❤️❤️
Love that for you sis
These two were my favorite!! I loved their healthy dynamic, the way they navigated issues, the way they treated each other.
Thank you for this video. I remember crying on how beautiful the story is between those two. Green flags and healthy relationship examples are sooooo important. Tiffany and Brett are the greatest that has been this show and any other dating shows. It’s so refreshing to see them ❤
I cried watching too, it was beautiful to see!
I was afraid Brett could be the SK of this season: the guy who knows how to say exactly the right things in the right moments only to let you fall from the highest point. But this couple where really knowing and loving each other with each conversation 🥺💜
They were the ones that made me go, that's what I want. So now I'm working on myself even more so I can have this type of relationship.
Love that for you ♥️
I can’t wait to see all different types of content from you BUT can we please get a season 1 LIB breakdown in there as well! Or at least Lauren and Cameron ❤ Love your videos
Would love that!
Yesss I too vote for another healthy couple review 💕
Me too!! That’s the only season I fully watched . @ Stephanya pretty please
I would love to see a Lauren and Cameron video!
Lauren and cameron !!! yess please ❤❤
I love Brett and Tiffany. I’d like to see you review season one of love is blind. Also maybe you could do a video on how to move on after the death of a significant other in a healthy way .
i love that:)
Really appreciated this! I totally get you thinking Tiffany seemed to good to be true. I had similar thoughts about both of them and their relationship. But it just goes to show that we’re fed so much drama, that the healthy, happy and unproblematic people often go unnoticed. Thanks for putting the spotlight on something positive!
you put it very well
I was just discussing in my last therapy session how hard is it to find role models for healthy relationships and this video is exactly what I needed. Thanks ❤
I am right there with you - I want to see more older candidates on the show and more of these healthy relationships so people can see real people in real healthy relationships and how they navigate those. The show has to have some drama which is fine, but I’m here for the wholesome side that we see in these mature, happy couples ❤
Brett and Tiffany were such a welcome relief every time they came on screen this season! They seem like really lovely people and a great couple
Thank you for this! This couple was a breath of fresh air. And your assessments are always so insightful. Could we have more videos like this? With healthy relationships and ways to maintain despite various challenges (distance, children, different levels of wealth, sickness, etc).
Steph! Love your relationship breakdowns! Please do “The Ultimatum-Queer Love” next! I would love to hear your thoughts about the lesbian couples on that show. It was fascinating to watch both partners in a couple being so expressive about their emotions and verbalizing their feelings! That show was excellent!
I thought Brett had spent so much time being a strong rock for Tiffany that he hadn’t processed his own nerves and anxiety. He didn’t have as much control over the wedding planning as he might have liked given the process by which he met his wife and I think when the one thing he was able to choose, his tuxedo, didn’t fit correctly all of the stress caught up with him and overflowed
I agree. Plus it’s been clear that his appearance is important to him and they played in his face
Netflix messed up they should have just put Brett and Tiff on our screen from the fist second to the last. Show us how to build and have healthy relationships - beautiful mahn
Now this is one episode I have looking forward to the most...Even though it premiers 1a.m my time, I an here for it 😊😊😊
I didn't feel Brett's upset regarding his slacks was a red flag. He is definitely particular about his clothes and fit and that is Ok. His brother's presentation is quite different and that is ok as well. We all have "that thing" that we are a little extra about. And Tiffany recognizes that he is a little BOO-ZHEE and teases him about it. Great Review!
Steph! Please keep the nerd knowledge coming, I love the way you explain concepts. The detail, examples and references are Great! You are both entertaining and educational and seem wise beyond your years.
They are ABSOLUTELY my fav couple of all time from LIB!!! It is so so refreshing to see a Black love story that is healthy and showcases how to go about relationship the right way. Im rooting for them!!!
I'm crying during like half of this video because they are so sweet and inspiring to me
I LOVED seeing this. It makes me tear up when I see examples of truly healthy relationships and conflict. I think a lot of us relate to not having those examples growing up.
I would love to see some content on how not to over-intellectualise our emotions, and how to just sit and feel them in the moment. You mentioned in the video how we have a tendency to want to move past or 'fix' our emotions in the moment, rather than just allowing ourselves to FEEL. Thanks for all your hard work!
Yes great idea ❤❤
Yes! Holding space for emotions is soooo important. I’m so glad shes touching on this.
This is my absolute favorite analysis so far! It is so nice to see and examine a beautiful, healthy relationship! I look forward to every one of these videos 💗 I don't watch the show, and don't want to. I love how you break it down and tell the couples' story. I feel like we are good friends discussing your other friends' drama lol. Thank you Steph for your thoughts and genuine care for people 💗🌸
Aw I love that!! Thanks for watching, friend ♥️
I learned a lot here and noticed some of my own patterns. Appreciate your take and experience with how couples misinterpret things. It's hard to not take things personally sometimes because my mind moves so fast, but my partner and I are working on assuming best intent with each other. Assume he is coming to me with love and care and honesty. These two do that, their relationship was my fave since season one.
The way I perceived the pants situation is that he is a go getter, he doesn't sit and feel like the victim and feel helpless, he act. He solves the problem. I like that and I think that is a very reassuring quality to have in a partner.
This just warms my heart 💚✨We can learn so much from green flags. It’s so easy to get caught up in red flags and honestly the drama of shows like this, but watching this video is so beautiful and a breath of fresh air💚 Love this video and couple!
OMG! These 2. I have no words. I love their love. They are so perfect for each other. I am rooting for their love to last forever. Wow! It was a joy watching them. Brett, you are amazing period. Tiff, so nurturing for sure. I am still in awe! My favourite couple ever! Both their dad's said they wil make it and they will. I am 49 but iyoh, I learnt so much about pure love from these 2. Thank you Brett and Tiff. May God bless your union.
This was such a helpful video, especially helped me was the point about not letting small disagreements determine the relationship
Just wanna say I love your channel!! Your voice is soothing and your relationship break downs are spot on. I’m game to watch anything you make but a movie relationship I’d love covered is eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
I LOVE your videos and have been watching them faithfully for the past few months. I would really appreciate additional videos about behavioral addictions (food, sex, love, etc) and adult ADHD, respectively. Can’t wait to see what you come out with next!
I've loved watching this series. Psychology is a passion of mine, and even though counseling isn't typically the field I'm most drawn to studying (I'm a huge fan of going to therapy), being able to analyze relationships with specific models so clearly is invaluable. Please continue this series with other shows, I need more of this content!!
What a beautiful couple! They seemed genuine and kind, inside and out.
Thanks for sharing your insight on both healthy and toxic relationship dynamics! Love hearing your insight on navigating conflict and showing support for others. Thank you for all you do. 😊
definitely a beautiful couples..I enjoy watching them..I love how the communication and transparency and the support was on point on both sides..
This was an AMAZING video I love this break down of a healthy relationship! This analysis literally made me tear up to see this amazing communication, this was absolutely beautiful. Please do more analysis of HEALTHY relationships and communication tips. I loved this video. 💖☺️
Omg I just love this couple so much and you, Steph, are extremely wise and intelligent. I’m glad I found someone I respect and learn from.
100% everything you said! They are my favorite couple EVER; a shining example of a healthy relationship.
I love these two. I love your take on them! I like that he was able to get the tux corrected.
My wife and I were hoping you'd make a video about this couple! Your videos always make for such great discussions ❤
I absolutely love your breakdowns from LIB and this is a favourite looking back on Tiffany and Brett's journey on the show. Seeing their communication and how they really held space for each other was so refreshing and beautiful - got me taking notes for my own communication work hahah. Absolutely rooting for them forever
I love to see you geeking out in this video from a therapist perspective on how good they communicate, this is actually one of your most helpful videos so far imo because it's so nice to see a good example in real life of people making things work
After seeing soooo many therapist videos based on LIB or ultimatum. Your videos are still my favourite! The videos are well-made and you are so articulate, easy to listen to. Just wanna show some support here! Keep up the good work!!
This was such a great review and breakdown of the couple. Listening to this made me reflect on my own relationship history and communication style
I resonated with the part about it being too good to be true. I was thinking this relationship was too perfect, they fit so well. But I’m so happy for them❤️🔥
When two securely attached people find each other ❤❤😊😊😊
You can do what you do with Love is blind but with series like Queen charlotte and the bridgerton, I would definitively watch !!
Yessss, we need a breakdown of the Queen Charlotte and King George dynamic!
I've watched all of your love is blind videos, and I'm so glad I watched this one last. They're so wholesome and mature. I could literally cry. You did great coverage on all of the couples!
Aw thank you for sticking with me through all of them!
They really are wonderful role models. Couple goals!
It was beautiful watching Brett and Tiffany's love story on the show. Your videos are awesome because there's always an explanation and lesson that comes along with your review of the couples. As someone who has benefited from therapy and is intrigued by human behavior - your videos are both fun and informative. Brett and Tiffany's story is refreshing because it's not often we see healthy relationships develop on reality tv.
I found your chanel after a video showed up regarding LIB season 5 and I am so happy it did. I love, love, love the Browns and I for one think having your partner, soul mate and best friend be the same person is 100 percent the best feeling in the world.
Although they may not have been the most "exciting" couple to watch if you love the drama, Brett and Tiff really made this whole season of LIB for me. I absolutely loved them!
I smiled throughout this entire video. It was such a blessing to see Dr. Steph be able to enjoy a couple from one of these shows instead of having to point out all the red flags and issues so she could teach us how to have healthier and stronger relationships. She got to point out all the RIGHT things to do because it was demonstrated by Brett & Tiffany. And the glow in Dr. Steph's eyes as she did was beautiful to see!!! 🤗🥰🤗🤗
Right!? I was smiling the whole time as well. Dr. Steph is a gem 💎
i liked this break down. You offered great points, it gave me insight into some of the healthy dynamics they had, good points
I don't even watch this show but I saw a suggested video with green flags. So much content is about red flags & how to recognise them but I'm loving this green flag thing. I loved this video. Subscribing because yes to all you said in this video & communication.
Hi. I think it would be great to see you review Lauren and Cameron. Wondering if you could do a green flags review for them as well.
I love, love your channel, I look forward to all of your breakdowns. So many people are doing reviews and breakdowns but yours is by the far the best, the smartest. You speak so well I listen to every word. Netflix needs to hire you to host Love is Blind
Loved this! Definitely want more relationship-related videos! My fiancé and I watch your videos together and then discuss them after 🥰
Aw I love that!
I’d loveee if you did a series breaking down the different relationship dynamics of classic romance movies.
I immediately think of Anne Hathaway’s movie “One Day” and how her one sided to on again off again tumultuous relationship dynamic played out. I’d love to hear your analysis of movies like that!
Can you do a series like this on The Ultimatum Queer love. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
This video was everythingggg😮💨👏🏽 being able to visually see greens flags & healthy ways to communicate definitely helped me map out my emotional responses and what I can work on to do better💕
I love this video. I think more therapists should talk about and show examples of green flags/healthy relationships. This is definitely a reminder to stay focused on my goals and check myself on displacement.
I fast forwarded through everyone's stories except for Brett and Tiffany's. Thanks for such a great breakdown :)
Love the commentary as usual. I am going to be honest I don't even watch love is blind I just like hearing the commentary.
i would love to see you breaking down love is blind brazil!! and also the ultimatum, i love hearing your thoughts about reality tv!!
About them always being dressed up for the proposal - apparently all proposals happen on the same day. So they know what the last day is and to dress up. Lauren and Cameron said even theirs occurred on Day 10 like everyone else but the show just cut it to make it look like he proposed immediately.
The review we needed, thanks for doing these two💚
I would love more videos of green flags
My partner and I have recently gone through some traumatizing experiences resulting in myself in therapy for PTSD and we are both invested in our couples therapy, which we have been involved in together for about a month.
Something I caught on to in this video was when you said Brett was falling into an old dynamic that he's had in the past with his brother. I feel that myself and my partner tend to do that when we are stressed! My partner reminds me a lot of Brett
Steph, I have been binge watching so many of your videos since I discovered your channel this week. Your analyses are not only grounded in evidence from the field but you are also thoughtful in your application of it to these scenarios and the individual and collective situations. You have given me so much clarity and a lot to reflect on in terms of not only the types of relationships we see in pop culture but also on my own personal relationships as well. I am truly just in awe and admire your analyses so much!!
With that being said I would LOVE LOVE LOVE if you could review season 2 of the ultimatum. I am a queer woman and would love to see this representation! Thank you so much for all of your eye opening videos ❤️❤️❤️
I would absolutely love to hear your thoughts on „Love is Blind Japan“. I felt like it was such a novel experience to watch those couples in- and outside of the pods and even though the first (and unfortunately only season, as far as i know) has aired years ago, some of the couples are still going strong with the life partner that they even built a family with. Makes me so happy to see them thrive. Your personal and professional perspective would be such an enrichment.
Thank you so so much for the effort you put into creating all this amazing content ♥️
Oooh loved this next you could do love is blind Brazil season 3❤
Lovely video. Thank you😊
I was wondering if you'd consider breaking down The Ultimatum: Queer Love. I would be interested to know your thoughts on it😊
I love videos reacting to situations since it helps me learn so much more about how to handle my situations. It's different when you're just listening to someone talk about how to go about certain feelings versus seeing an example and having it explained if that makes sense. Anyways I love your content so much, thanks!
Ive only really seen bad examples of relationships in real life and in the media so this is really everything 💕
Could you do a video on approaching dating apps / meeting in person?
Also love the Tiffany & Brett green flags video!!
I loved these two so much. They seemed so connected to each other and so committed. It was honestly very funny to even include Brett freaking out about his pants, because I think that was Netflix trying to manufacture a little bit of drama with this couple. And a man being particular about their appearance is a good thing as long as they are not hypercritical of others, which doesn’t seem to be a Brett problem. I think Tiffany also texted Brett about Jackie’s absence because she wanted Marshall to know and knew Brett could break it to him respectfully
I love when you explained about conflict and about how quickly you have conflict and then you can get over it my family that I live with my mom and my dad you know they my dad especially has talked to me about that as he is helping me you no understand life as an adult even as a thirty-six-year-old adult but he is you know helping me and and he sometimes explains that that how quickly you know they have a fight but that how quickly they can get over it so I loved how you were
Question, what if you are dating with intention but also go with the flow of if that person is right for you. Basically, you do want a relationship but you don’t know if you want it the person you are dating. In my dating experience there are usually two extremes: people who are ready to be committed quickly and then people who aren’t looking for anything serious at all. I find I fall in the middle. I do want a relationship, if that’s what naturally happens but people are express their desire for a relationship on the date scare me.
I was so glad they got past that simple misunderstanding of her falling asleep. I could tell she’s a heavy sleeper bc I am so the opposite, I’d wake up instantly if someone were trying to get my attention. They communicated about this so well, and it was a thing of the past.
Oh, thanks for saying that bit about people who cry when other people are crying… I be crying and I used to really shame myself for it when I was younger 😂 my emotions live besides my eyes
@StephAnya, 3 things:
1) I'm a relatively new viewer of your content and you are terrific. Clearly knowledgeable, well educated in your field, and a lovely bedside manner;
2) I enjoy the love stories MUCH more than the conflict and the train wrecks so thank you so much for doing a green flag video. I was so taken with Brett & Tiffany, with their friends, their families, everything. Thank you for doing an analysis of what good looks like, and finally;
3) would you please do a green flag analysis of Lauren & Cameron from season one? They were another mature couple who navigated the LIB experience beautifully AND they had an added element of navigating an interracial relationship. Would love to get your analysis of their journey, including how they managed the family and friend relationships. Some real nuggets in there, too.