@@ElegeantFencer What a heaping generalization. The fyp on tiktok is tailored to what you like to see/engage in. There are superficial tiktok *people*, but there are also many, many people just like OP who don’t deserve the write off.
@@TK-cg4ks It's just based on my experiences from what all the girls in my school use tik tok for (ex. showing off their looks or shaking their asses). But yeah I understand where you're coming from.
@@penultimateh766 It's true really. Thinking about what we could have done is completely devoid of any rational thought, because you are trying to teleport your current persona to the past to fix old mistakes, and yet your current personality was molded by your past mistakes. It's a paradox really. Not to mention that we often forget true reasons why we did things in the past. It's very simple, but no one likes thinking about this, as it leads to the realization that free will is an illusion.
@@humanii9037 Same here. BTW the weirdest thing happened to me just after I wrote "same here". Suddenly my heart started pounding, my lip was shaky and I was dizzy. At that moment I thought I shouldn't have taken that energy drink can! :). Regret comes so natural to us haha. Yet, when I analyze things, it all just happened the way they were supposed to.
**CAREER & EDUCATION** - don't have limiting beliefs about yourself - educate yourself more, more, more - seek out mentors (other than your parents) **LIFESTYLE & HEALTH** - stick to a sport - stick to an instrument **RELATIONSHIPS & SOCIAL LIFE** - pick your friends carefully (and distance yourself from some of them sooner rather than later) - be your authentic self and you'll attract the right people **PERSONAL LIFE** - be kinder - journal
This is really true. But the ending is even worse. You end up alone. The moment people feel they know you, you are forever boxed on what assumptions they have created.
@@pedroginja9988 Well, the point is we are being real no matter what they think about us. People's assumption about us is out of our control. Yeah, we might end up being alone for showing our true self. But then, I believe time will come that you'll attract the right people into your life because you are showing your authentic self :)) I myself had experienced this, I'd thought I'll be alone for life but I realized that it's because I've shown my real self to the right people and they accepted me for who I am that I still have them today in my life.
As a teenager, I try to live the moment and not “post” the moment. I try to experience and discover as much as I can. I try to find new good habits, new places, and new experiences. I try to teach and develop myself as much as possible. I try to not care about people’s looks at me. I try to be a good person with all my heart. Trying all those things at once every single day is hard work yet so amazing and worth it!
I used to live the moment instead posting it too but now I live the moment first and end the moments with a picture so I can remember it many years later. You need a trigger to remind you of these great moment because you’d be very surprised at how quickly our brains forget.
wow! I don't know why but this hit me hard. I think that people now always try to 'prove' themselves on Social media and 'prove' to their friends that they are having fun instead of actually living in the moment and having fun. For example, some people will film pratically the whole concert and post the videos onto social media, instead of living in the moment and experiencing the concert they spent a lot of money on through their own eyes to show their friends/social media that they went to see a concert instead of telling them about it after.
The only lesson that I would've liked to learn earlier (I'm almost 18, so by earlier I mean when I started my teenage years) is to embrace my introversion. Forcing myself to be extroverted and try to hang out with everyone when in reality I didn't feel comfortable at all made me think that I was weird for a long time, which made my high school experience kind of meh. I think we aren't taught that enough, and we all just try to be socially extroverted people because that's the capitalist standard.
Kinda same here! I was dealing with the same thing in my early teenage. But I still have a thought creeping in my head that being an introvert is a weakness. It reduces one's ability of connecting with people. And I still regret for not maintaining relationships😶
i actually tried to practice socialization for the heck of proving to myself I can learn anything i set my mind into, but it just does not give me a reward. I dont light up. I said to myself that maybe asking questions instead to learn something from their life, then I realized I just forget all those conversations. Just a bunch of information that dont caught my interest. I don't like to gossip so no use to have long conversations.
Well, you DO have to care about what your employers and parents and professors and customers think, unless you are a subsistence farmer. But maybe you mean peers.
@@penultimateh766 She’s referring to people that cause harm. Not valuable and constructive criticism that might help you in the future. And no. You don’t gotta always care what your parents say especially knowing there’s emotionally abusive and narcissistic parents. Parents aren’t always right.
@@honeyandlavender_ You don't always have to care FOR what your parents say, but you have to care WHAT they say, while you're a teenager. If you ignore them completely, your life will probably be miserable, no matter if they are good or bad.
@@penultimateh766 Especially as a teenager, you have to care WHAT they say even if it’s emotionally damaging? Most of us have to go therapy because others, who actually needed it, never went and they hurt us. That includes family. I grew up being manipulated to be something I never wanted to be. Not out of rebellion, but it didn’t connect with me and it’s not what I desired in life. They were more focused on *them* being proud, happy and what others thought about me. But I was miserable. My mother is a very insecure women and she projects herself whenever she comments about my body. I wished I’d noticed all that when I was younger. I wouldn’t have wasted many years of my life and it would’ve prevented a lot of tears in the shower and depression. I’m 23 now and I’m still trying to heal. So please explain to me how is someone going to be miserable, after not caring, even if they’re bad?
I think today, we as teenagers have so much to choose from that it can be overwhelming. We can do pretty much whatever we want, pursue whatever we want, travel wherever we want… This freedom of choice sometimes backfires and leads to a freeze - we won’t actually do anything which may even lead to loneliness. I also sometimes find myself struggling to appreciate what we already have since (in developed countries people live in this colossal abundance). Fortunately I often remind myself of this and thus become a bit more grateful than usual.
I'm 25 and it's so interesting to hear your perspective on how the freedom of choice has crippled many people your age. I might have to make a video about counteracting this :) Loved your re-frame back into gratitude, brother!
I am almost 20 and graduated this year and I definitely am in this state of "freeze" because there are so many possibilities and I havent figure out what I wanna do yet. And because of that I am doing not really anything while all people my age are moving out and start to go to university or work... It is very overwhelming. And also lonely because I dont really know someone with a similar experience...
this is reall well put I find myself in his situation way too often being a teen and a really interesting perspective I will do well to remind mself to be grateful, thank you for this!
@@noelleb.8547 whoa heyy! I'm in the same situation actually, being the same age aswell. and all this time I've spent on the internet I've never really found anyone until now... in the same shoes as me, I feel like the world around me is moving on it feels like I'm stuck, wasting my days as you said, it does really get lonely I feel confused all the time. On the bright side, you're not the only who has had this sort of experience. I truly hope you figure things out :D
If I was a teen again I would not play safe. I would learn to work on me while also having fun and enjoying my life. Also not taking ppls opinions too seriously.
This is exactly what I had on my mind. But I think this is an advice that doesn't have to go to the past - it applies to this present moment and might be what your future self would tell your present self.
My best advice to my teenage self would be to put myself in more uncomfortable situations that would challenge me mentally and physically. It really helps in developing discipline and building character. Along with that, I'd also advise myself to not really go with the flow but to take charge of my life. I don't have any regrets but now, in hindsight, I see how both these things would've helped me a lot.
I am a teenager and this is definitely something I struggle with! I only have 2 more years of high school. And I need to stop being afraid to fail and embarrass myself or like not take a chance. I need to put myself out there more. Hopefully I can really grow and learn.
As an Introvert teenager (16) who spends all her time at home, I am trying to improve myself as much as I can. Building my confidence. Reading A LOT of books. Learning another Languages. Looking for my passion. Being healthy and kind with my family and friends. Planning for better Life for me in the future. I wanna be that educated, independent, smart, confident and courteous women, And I will! Thx for this video, all support 🤍.
Hi, I'm a teen. Thank you for all of the insight, Lana. Sometimes when I'm in a group of people who are all scrolling through social media on their phones, I step back and observe. Everyone in their own fake world as life passes by. However, there is a certain pressure that says "you must enjoy your teenage years before you reach adulthood". Some people consider teenage years to be the epitome of freedom, however I would argue that adults are more free in terms of finance, travel, exposure to more people, and less peer pressure. Many teenagers spend their time contemplating what their future adulthood will look like, and many adults wish they could be young again.
"you must enjoy your teenage years before you reach adulthood". ISTG BROOOOO I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT, its always "enjoy being a kid while u can buddy, it only gets worse" but how tf am I supposed to enjoy anything when I have people basically acting like these are my last years to live or something, I'm supposed to enjoy my teenage years with all this pessimism and doomerism about adulthood being shoved down my throat?
Im still a teenager but what I would tell my younger self and what I am telling myself now is to NOT CARE what OTHER people THINK. Much easier said than done tho.
Hi! I am a teenager. I feel like there is a lot of things that is confusing and hard to understand. In my earlier teenage years I felt scared and wanted to fit in everywhere so badly. Now I still want to fit in but I have realized that no one really cares about what I do or say so, it’s okay to talk and express myself. Not being myself is just a waste of time. That is something I regret even though I’m still young. Thanks for your video🤍
Hey there! I am a teenager as well and I’m still stuck on realizing nobody cares about what you do. Like I feel like I am going to be judged or hated if I don’t act a certain way which is not me being myself. I really would just love to express myself and I currently regret that I can’t make this change and that I care so much about how people talk about me. I don’t know if I’m sensitive or a people pleaser or both but if someone talks bad about me I will try and fix it and try to make them like me again. It’s so exhausting, I’m constantly being nice and kind but I don’t set boundaries leading up to me having to do things I don’t want to do. People end up picking on me and I cave in all over again and shut people out and become very quiet. Writing this down I just made a realization maybe I’m not so introverted as I put myself out to be, but maybe I’m exhausted because I’m constantly trying to be nice to people even if I get hurt. And I don’t joke about things or make comments cause sometimes I don’t feel like I’m valid. Maybe I’m pretty extraverted but all these fears are holding me back. I want to change so badly. I’m so tired of people bringing me down and then I beat myself about it too. But I’m scared of rejection and people hating me cause I try to make people like me. Argh I don’t know what to do. This has been going on since middle school and I can’t seem to break free.
I'm 15 and self-developement is my main concern. However, this year has taught me to reset my WHY- from perfectionism to self love. I've also realized maybe things aren't THAT deep. I have a huge gift of time and I'm learning to balance between spending that time for enjoyment and for work.. both are incredibly vital. Just recently discovered the only way to subside my anxiety and have begun throwing myself at every fear- friends, strangers, work, my UA-cam career, freaking roller coasters. So much fun lol
6:54 That's so true! If you're not much of a socializer, just by being yourself attracts similar people. I was thought as a party-goer and a dater in college when in fact I'm not just by the way I present myself, I'm always dressed up and had makeup on and I was quiet about my interests hence the wrong impression. I stay indoors 80% of the time, listening to music, reading, introspecting, writing, painting, watching youtube, cooking, singing. I like fashion so much, I dress to feel good and confident
If I was a teenager again, I would tell myself to stop being so harsh on myself and hold myself to impossible standards, that everything would be okay. Things would eventually fall into place. I'm still 22 so I'd be telling this to my highschool self (when I was under 18). Also Lana, indeed it's never too late to learn a musical instrument or continue playing the instrument to reach a higher level! I decided to force myself to learn classic piano when I was 17, when most people start classic piano at a really young age. It was difficult initially, and I quit taking lessons after a year, but I kept practicing on my own. It's been 5 years, I can play more complex pieces now, and I have no regrets! I used to think that I should have started sooner, I could have become a classical pianist or something, but I don't have that kind of regret now. The learning process itself is extremely enjoyable.
i know right! the joy of being able to play some of my favorite pieces (some of them are just too hard for me hahaha), makes me not regret starting, even if it was "late"!
If I were a teenager again, I'd try to ENJOY my life more than what I actually did. Academic and financial pressure has taken a huge toll on my mental sanity. I wish that this wasn't the case and that I could go back in time and be happy again :(
I used to think the same way, but it is thanks to your teenage years you have this mindset/understanding now. Heck imo your teenage years and twenties are established to mess up and experience life. Take this as a chance to live your life as you would if it were your teenage years, but it's so much better when you're a little older as you have more independence. I used to think the same way but came to conclusion that I'd do the EXACT same thing if I relived as a teenager, and it was a miserable time. Post teenage years are the best, mentally and physically. I was actually so stressed during my teenage years I looked older than I do now. Best of luck!
I'm a teen and seeing this video made me realise some things I've been avoiding for a while now. I guess it's time to clean up the mess in my life, thank you Lana!
Hi! As a teen, I think that what concerns me the most is that I'm worried about school exams, grades and I fear to be unsuccessful. This is a big problem that I think prevents me from being truly happy and enjoying more my young life :( Lot of love from France! 🇫🇷💕
Yes me too. Usually teachers says "Grades are not everything" but I think is just a lie like any other student. Is true that grades don't rappresent your intelligence but at school if you have bad grades its over.
As an adult, I advice you to focus on your school and also don't forget to enjoy the extracurricular activities. Being an introvert and an extremely insecure girl, I avoided all the social events and trips during my school time. I regret not being a bit more serious in my studies and also not trying to be more social and enjoy my school time because you’ll never ever get these times back. I hope you enjoy your teenage years as much as you can but also be consistent on your studies. Best of luck ❤
Yeah a letter/ number grading can affect us in a positive & negative way. In middle school I wanted to have bad grades to fit in. At the end of high school I started to care. In college I care and when I get low grade it makes me feel like I’m just not smart. But that’s not true. There’s other variables as to why we struggle academically ❤️ for me it’s adhd
You must be a type 3 enneagram.Anyways just remember that grades and school are not everything. Life is so much bigger than that. This sounds harsh but one day you will be gone and all of the stuff you are stressing out about won’t matter. Live life to the fullest, let go, and just have fun. You are only a teenager once so make these years count.
@@bluerose8165 that’s what i thought too, but you know, when i grew up and went to college. I can promise you, they’re right. Grades are definitely not everything, at least for me!
Sometimes I wish I was a teenager in this era. Not because it would be particularly easier but simply because the world has changed so much that I'd certainly find the strength to keep going and stay true to myself by finding more relatable and trustful role models whose advice that I'd be more likely to accept and appreciate...
@E v e I think you'd still experience the things that teenagers typically do, but at least you'd have a healthier perception of things like body positivity, self-confidence and so on..
It's so interesting how much has changed for the life of a teenager in this modern world and yet, how much would still be consistent with our teenage years too :)
Agree. Also, let's not forget the things that we were bullied for as teenagers are cool now. I think my life would be for sure easier as a teenager nowadays
I wish I had been more confident in my life and followed my gut feelings in pursuing the things I loved doing. Thank you, Lana, for sharing your advice. You are not alone!
I always try to be friendly to everybody, regardless of their actions, if I know them or not, the prejudices I have about them etc.. For example when I go jogging and I greet random people with a smile there is nothing better than seeing them smile and greet back!
i am 14 and i really hope to enjoy and make the best out of my teenage years, thank you Lana for being with me in my most precious years, i may not really be the best person out here but i try to be kind to people at my school and class. I try to never skip classes and take care of my studies i am also dancing, cooking, drawing, singing, reading and i wrote 2 books by now ! I really like how i feel that i am doing my best, i also have a crush on someone like any teenager but i know i could never have that someone, and it's okay ! Because sometimes we meet people that teach us lessons to not make those mistakes again, i am also reading Agatha Christie and Dostoievskie cause i rlly love those type of books, to everyone here around my age, enjoy your years and be kind to your self, love your self the way you are cause we are all made by the same thing in the end of the day :)
If I was a teenager again, I would take things in an easier way. When you are young things happen in your life and you think they are definite but they are not. Oh god if I knew that I would have made some completely different decisions
I’m a teenager living off of fear, two more years of high school. I am just trying to look for ways to improve so these last two years I can actually enjoy myself instead of going to school thinking I’m going to embarrass myself or try to please people.
@@Wackaz you speak as if you know her. You do not know her, no one here does. You have a fragmented tunnel vision of reality your self and place your subjective idea-forms onto the rest of society. Not all people suffer from lack of financial stability, there are many poor people in this world who are very content with life. Suffering is not the only reaction one feels there are other higher states of being that can be embodied. Your label-placing political mind is limiting and fails to see the relative nature of all-life.
@@Wackaz maybe she objects capitalism but considers it the most accurate and suitable ( and flawed system, which "all" systems are)...just like i do...maybe you could peek into some history of horrors of WW2...prolly you'd have a second thought coming regarding marxist utopia...🙂 good vibes!
If I was a teenager, I would live *MORE* in the moment. When you're at that young age, you're in a point of your life where you have the *opportunity* to make mistakes, get out there and *LEARN* more about yourself. Once you get to a certain age, you need to be more 'responsible' and make smarter decisions... so there's little room to explore yourself, without facing more serious consequences. Life's too short, enjoy it! 💪🏻
@@auguste573 You want to live life without regrets. Don't fear embarrassment, fear never having the opportunity to do something again. It's so much worse
I’d tell myself to be less afraid of failure and just take things less seriously. Of course work hard and try your best in things, but realize some things are just not meant for everyone, and it’s ok to try different things that you might be more willing to work for. Teenage years especially are truly just for learning and experimenting, it’s hard to do so with a very fixed mindset.
Totally agree with what you said about being more considerate. Most of my life I'd been bullied by my peers which made me see them shallowly, only as bullies. Now that I realised, their bullying oftentimes stemmed from the immaturity of our adolescent years. My pain that they had caused most probably hadn't stemmed from their evilness, but rather the mistake that they made when having fun at the expense of other people's happiness. Looking at this now, this experience gives me the opportunity to play "the big sister" in my head to educate those bullies alike & to calm down the pain that my adolescent self has experienced back then. It was an overall eye-opening experience & it would be nice if I had realised all these back then.
One thing I would tell my younger self is all those times you would cry because you wished you could hug yourself when you felt alone and in pain. YOU CAN! And you can do much more that just that. Learn to heal 🤍 Learn that pain is inevitable ✨
as a teenager now, my main concerns are things such as school, my future, identity and also our changing climate. it feels quite hard to focus on what’s really important in life, when there’s something bad always happening. also the social media can feel pretty overwhelming. personally, i’m dealing with an eating disorder and other mental health issues and finding out the balance between my health, my future and society’s expectations is a hard work… but if something positive, your videos are really inspiring for me❤️
Same, i also having a hard time appreciating other beauty without doubting my own. But I know we can get through of this.You are not alone and remember theres always light in the end of the tunnel. Have a good day🍃🍂lovelots❤️
I spent 20 years caring so much about what the people around me thought and now I’m moving half way across the world and chances are I’ll never see these people again. I missed out on so many opportunities because i didn’t want people’s perception of me to change. I guess it’s important to know that the people you grow up with are probably not the people you’re going to flourish with
If it makes you feel any better take this as an opportunity. You have this understanding thanks to your teenage years. I truly believe teenage years and even your twenties are there for one to learn and mess up. See the following years as your new era where you can apply whatever you've learned, and trust me it feels so much better than being a teenager! Best of luck
it's so great that you've been able to get some good solid advice before you became a teenager, myself and most other teenagers didn't, and for me personally it made the whole experience a lot more difficult.
Although my daughter is still a child, I will take your advice into account together with my own past experience when the time comes. Thank you for your thoughts.
Lana, thank you for an awesome video. As always😍 Honestly it hurts a bit thinking about those years. It seems like so many mistakes were made and I should've done much better. A lot. But it's life. I guess we all get smarter and wiser and even kinder (sometimes) growing up. My favorite quote from your video is "the more you care about fitting in, the less you fit it". Couldn't agree more. Thank you, Lana.
ahh the first one you said about dreams not having to be ONLY dreams resonate with me a lot. i also dream big but never thought i could bring those dreams into my reality until after i graduated university. prior to this, i made major life decisions as a teen that didn't at all align with what i really wanted for myself because (prior to graduating uni) i believed my dreams were impractical and simply meant to be dreams. now as someone 2 years into the non-student life, i work very hard to keep this ambitious spirit alive to make conscientious decisions that make sense with what i really want.
I have the same regrets, from picking a sport, an instrument and specially being truthful to yourself to fit in. I'm aware now that I'm 27 about most things wrong in my life and I'm trying to be the person I love the most to find my place in the world.
Lana , I have aged like 5 damn years since 2020 .... I am just 16 but here's a piece of advice I would give to my younger self : Don't think about people, they don't think about you at all . They judge you just because they have time and they have a mouth to talk (shit) Don't think much . You are not wrong if you have a diff opinion speak up ! You don't have to be wrong or right . You do you . Your body is your only home , don't compare it be grateful that you have it ! It's ok if you get a big pimple on u r nose, if you are overweight.. it's ok ! You are just "not healthy" but you have been , are and will be always BEAUTIFUL ♡ (you have power to change the unhealthy you by some good habits leading to good lifestyle) Don't spend much time scrolling on yt on bad days , get up, take a hot shower, go on a walk , journal , meditate (even if you don't want to ! Do it ) ... Take a break if you are tired , it doesn't mean you have to give up . Also - Don't fall into bad patterns just because you know them ... One last thing....- Don't cut your arms instead ask for help . Know ,Accept and Embrace yourself and your journey of life. Believe and pray to something Now that I am getting better I regret it , seeing those scars hurts me but reminds me that I am Warrior who fought and never give up (I am crying while writing this , I think I never appreciated myself enough :( ) Lana , thank u so much . I grateful to have a virtual sister like you ! So much love dear . Ich liebe dich 🌻💛 Sending my love to Stockholm for you and 🐶
I would like to add that being healthy counts as self care! Of course you should love yourself whether you're over weight or not, but being physically healthy is extremely important and also helps with your mental health! You shouldn't obsess over weight, but if you're trying to improve yourself and live the best life possible, losing or gaining weight to a healthy level should definitely be a priority.
Please never stop doing what you are doing Lana! You're such an inspiration! :) I'm deeply humbled that I can watch these videos and absorb the wisdom that you share. :)
As a teen …… I was with a group of people since I didn’t wanna be alone and not because I wanted to be , I always felt left out and alone around them so I left now I’m mostly alone and doing things myself , I’m just 14 and I’m enjoying things by myself so don’t be afraid of being alone and it won’t really make you sad after a few days I think you would love doing things that you really love by yourself, a little story I have a friend who is 80 years old ( that’s my grandma 😭🤣) who also love spending her time alone and now we do things together like get flowers and go on walks in the streets of Denmark so the moral is your lonely grandparents can be the best buddies you ever had !!!! I love all of you so much
I would really reflect about what really matters to me and focus on that instead of other peoples opinions! But I feel like that's so much harder when you're younger 🌻
Hi! Thank you for the advice :) I'm 16, so from my perspective as a teenager social media has kind of just made everything worse. People are more distant, and meaner, I've noticed, and unhappier as well. We don't feel as motivated to do even things we really love, especially as it becomes harder and harder to succeed in life (dropping college acceptance rates, inflation, etc etc) and we find ourselves bogged down with inane amounts of work to try and fight the despairing feeling of imminent failure. However, it's also a time where everyone sort of just "gets it," if that makes sense. There's no one who you can't say something about feeling down about technology and where the world is headed who won't know precisely what you're talking about. So it's more isolated, but more connected at the same time. Ironic, huh.
When I was a teen I’m thankful that I stuck to who I was and I didn’t conform to what people wanted me to be. It’s not easy but later on in life it brings a satisfaction that can’t be taken away from you and it builds character. My advice to teens is build character which is love, joy or being cheerful, peace or calmness, patience, kindness, faithfulness or loyalty, and self control which is self discipline. These things will catapult you in life in whatever you do.
Thanks for the video! Really enjoyed it. I am a teen and I have concerns I guess for our over-consumption of information/stimulation from phones, social media, etc. I feel like that many of us don’t have much time truly by ourselves anymore. Leaving not much time to reflect upon ourselves properly. Leaving not much time to be in quiet.
my concern is people, including myself, spending lots of time on social media. i personally spend so much time on discord. really, the only other "hobby" i have that i really enjoy is reading. i used to write a lot when i was younger, and i do journal frequently. last week though i only went on social media for about 10-20 minutes a day and ive felt a lot more present. i didn't have to worry about anyone or "do" anything. while i am happy on discord (im talking with my friends!) i feel as if i should spend less time on it and find/do more hobbies purely for myself, and to grow.
Thank you Lana Im still 16, going through a lot earlier I felt so down but after watching ur vid and reading some comments you guys saved me from drowning in my own thoughts, Thank you again.
I am a teen and so far I do regreat some things I did in the past but I would not change anything because those mistakes made me a better person, the person that I am today.
I’m in my 20s and I’ve just recently given up my life and my hopes and dreams I left my job and now I have more time to do what I enjoy. I’m also a minimalist and I enjoy the smaller things in life .
Though you couldn't go back in time to tell your teenage self these things, you've just told them to this teenage me and it is exacty what she has always needed to hear
I just started college and I absolutely hate it because I’m an introvert and it’s so difficult for me to talk to people but somehow this video made me feel better, thanks❤️
I love how you explain to be kind. Most people these days focus on being selfish and mean. They believe it's called character development. We'll I don't if they are right or wrong. But what you are explaining seems right
Me as a 15 year old boy, am concerned about not being good enough for achieving all this dreams a I have, cause I don't really want a simple life but I know these things will be hard to achieve and I will have to put real effort on it.. so I've been studying daily this things I would use as tools to get to where I want to: algebra, programming, chess, music, web design, but the last week I've been losing motivation and haven't done anything... So I'm concerned about not being able to put myself back to study all this things... But if I want to be able to live like I would like then I will have to... And I guess it is okay rest sometimes... And just not get overwhelmed.
the way u speak is honestly so inspiring! As a teen, listening to you speak sounds like having an older sister :)) you should really start a podcast ❤️
Yes you can Ask questions Stick to one sport (swim) Stick to instrument (guitar, piano, drums) Be friendly not friend to all Be authentic and don’t make things up Be kinder for no reason and be all selfless and see people as people
Thank you SO much. I feel like I attrack the wrong people and your tip to be myself even more in those situations, to attrackt the right people helped me tremendously ❤❤❤❤
I am teenager and I learnt so much from this video like 1. Recently I have friendshiped a party person who likes dancing and singing in hope that it will bring more enthusiasm in life but.. I am a booky not a party . 2. I don't want to admit but yes , I think I have limiting believes about myself about what I know and sometimes I feel afraid but from now onwards I will go towards my dreams and learn in between . 3. Sports , I like them but I still don't like them this has been my persona for the people around me and I feel awkward to show them that I want to play . I always thought it to be for future thing . Lana , really beautiful video !! :-) But my experience through teenage - I feel like growing and an urge to keep growing and learning and living . I am very lively person (with myself) . :-D
Love the editing on this one Lana, you videos are always entertaining and very informational. I defenetly feel like i go really long times without journaling even tho its such a simple task. It shows how distracting this world is. Thanks again 🐥.
I just finished a K-drama called Reply 1988 and it happened to talk about the experiences of a group of teenage friends that grow up in the same neighborhood together. Their naive but passionate hearts, struggles, and their first love made me think a lot about my youth (I'm 25 now and I know I'm still young but of course not the same as my 18 years old me) and now I came across this video of Lana. I felt like we all have something we wish we did differently. I realized in those years, I had been affected by others' opinions and made my decision based on my parents' expectations and social convention so that somehow I missed to be an authentic me. I was trying to fit in, studying crazily so I could achieve what was considered "practical" and "stable" for the future. I wish I trusted my intuition and myself more. I was also afraid to confront or call out mean behaviors. I was an emotional person but always acted like I'm chill and indifferent. Now I have changed my mindset and actually be me. I feel like I could finally breathe and live my life...
I wish, I had someone who taught me all these in my teenage years, it could be less vulnerable if i knew them. Apart from that ,these all are very important and necessary facts you talked about. Anyone who's a teenager please listen lana and follow these steps, believe me your life will be better.
As a teenager, I try to enjoy my life with what I have and to make the best out of little things. I make sure to go out even if that means at the grocery store with my mom only to spend time with her. I volunteer at a library and enjoy finding people who match my energy. I first take few pictures and then spend the rest of the time enjoying the moment. I have a small obsession with boys however I always find a way to ground myself and love myself by journaling or going for a run for fun. I now feel older and more grown up than I did in middle school.💞
If I had one piece of advice for my teenage self, I’d say to not wait to do something until it’s too late. Now nearly 22, I’m constantly stressed about all the things I need to do… when I could’ve had them all done earlier
@@bri1317 I understand what you’re saying. I appreciate your words! It’s just a lot harder said than done you know? I think maybe if you knew my situation, then maybe you would understand why I feel the way I do.
im a teen and I don't know what to do in my teen years rn . But watching this vid and reading the comments kinda helped me . Well im still finding what should i change but yeah ,reading comments helped me
as a 14, almost 15 year old, your advice is still really relevant, i fully agree with being kinder and being authentic because it can hard and exhausting to chase the wrong people out and attract the right people into your life as a young person, and in the future it can leave you thinking "why didn't i do this when i could have?"
I'm still a teen but advice I would give to my younger self is 1. To care less, learn to spend time alone as its the way you would know about yourself without seeking validation from anyone 2.There's no rush in finding out what you want to do in life its time to explore everything just live as a teen 3.Value your inner peace more than anything
The social media and the separation due to the pandemic must be quite a challenge for those who are teens now. We could listen more to teens... with the intention to understand, to really connect ☀️
"U can be friendly with someone, without being friends with them. "
-Lana Blakely
Can we just take a moment to appreciate this woman's beautiful, peaceful and calm demeanor?
well we have taken millions of moments for the same not that it feels common for us now XD
Yes, yes we can
ok I’m done ✨
Yeah opposite of the superficiality of tik tok girls.
@@ElegeantFencer What a heaping generalization. The fyp on tiktok is tailored to what you like to see/engage in. There are superficial tiktok *people*, but there are also many, many people just like OP who don’t deserve the write off.
@@TK-cg4ks It's just based on my experiences from what all the girls in my school use tik tok for (ex. showing off their looks or shaking their asses). But yeah I understand where you're coming from.
If I was a teenager again, I would be a teenager again, and would do everything exactly how I did it the first time lol.
Yes, really. Because how could you possibly know that your choices would have the outcome you wanted? Unless you killed someone or something.
Haha that sounds like a nightmare to me I just wouldn’t go back I like the way things happen even the hard times
@@penultimateh766 It's true really. Thinking about what we could have done is completely devoid of any rational thought, because you are trying to teleport your current persona to the past to fix old mistakes, and yet your current personality was molded by your past mistakes. It's a paradox really. Not to mention that we often forget true reasons why we did things in the past.
It's very simple, but no one likes thinking about this, as it leads to the realization that free will is an illusion.
@@humanii9037 Same here. BTW the weirdest thing happened to me just after I wrote "same here". Suddenly my heart started pounding, my lip was shaky and I was dizzy. At that moment I thought I shouldn't have taken that energy drink can! :). Regret comes so natural to us haha. Yet, when I analyze things, it all just happened the way they were supposed to.
@@humanii9037
I wouldn't go back either. My life is better now than when I was a teenager.
**CAREER & EDUCATION**
- don't have limiting beliefs about yourself
- educate yourself more, more, more
- seek out mentors (other than your parents)
**LIFESTYLE & HEALTH**
- stick to a sport
- stick to an instrument
**RELATIONSHIPS & SOCIAL LIFE**
- pick your friends carefully (and distance yourself from some of them sooner rather than later)
- be your authentic self and you'll attract the right people
**PERSONAL LIFE**
- be kinder
- journal
"The more you care about fitting in, the less you fit in."
-Lana Blakely
Yeah. Be your authentic self. Don't be afraid to show the real you.
This is seriously very valuable to know and I’ve had to learn it through personal experience
well said
This is really true. But the ending is even worse. You end up alone. The moment people feel they know you, you are forever boxed on what assumptions they have created.
@@pedroginja9988 Well, the point is we are being real no matter what they think about us. People's assumption about us is out of our control. Yeah, we might end up being alone for showing our true self. But then, I believe time will come that you'll attract the right people into your life because you are showing your authentic self :)) I myself had experienced this, I'd thought I'll be alone for life but I realized that it's because I've shown my real self to the right people and they accepted me for who I am that I still have them today in my life.
But who am I?
As a teenager, I try to live the moment and not “post” the moment. I try to experience and discover as much as I can. I try to find new good habits, new places, and new experiences. I try to teach and develop myself as much as possible. I try to not care about people’s looks at me. I try to be a good person with all my heart. Trying all those things at once every single day is hard work yet so amazing and worth it!
I used to live the moment instead posting it too but now I live the moment first and end the moments with a picture so I can remember it many years later. You need a trigger to remind you of these great moment because you’d be very surprised at how quickly our brains forget.
wow! I don't know why but this hit me hard. I think that people now always try to 'prove' themselves on Social media and 'prove' to their friends that they are having fun instead of actually living in the moment and having fun. For example, some people will film pratically the whole concert and post the videos onto social media, instead of living in the moment and experiencing the concert they spent a lot of money on through their own eyes to show their friends/social media that they went to see a concert instead of telling them about it after.
@@MillieAkister yeah that’s kinda sad tbh. Kills the whole vibe. A picture after the concert ends with your friends is the only way I would do it.
You have the right attitude. Embrace it and always find more ways to love yourself. Self love is really underrated
Neatly worded ❤
The only lesson that I would've liked to learn earlier (I'm almost 18, so by earlier I mean when I started my teenage years) is to embrace my introversion. Forcing myself to be extroverted and try to hang out with everyone when in reality I didn't feel comfortable at all made me think that I was weird for a long time, which made my high school experience kind of meh. I think we aren't taught that enough, and we all just try to be socially extroverted people because that's the capitalist standard.
Same here - such a wasted efford
Kinda same here!
I was dealing with the same thing in my early teenage.
But I still have a thought creeping in my head
that being an introvert is a weakness.
It reduces one's ability of connecting with people. And I still regret for not maintaining relationships😶
Same!
Yes! I wish I knew that being an introvert is okay, and there is no need to try to change that.
i actually tried to practice socialization for the heck of proving to myself I can learn anything i set my mind into, but it just does not give me a reward. I dont light up. I said to myself that maybe asking questions instead to learn something from their life, then I realized I just forget all those conversations. Just a bunch of information that dont caught my interest. I don't like to gossip so no use to have long conversations.
Best advice I could give: *don’t care what other people think* How they think about you has more to say about their own insecurities than it does you
Well, you DO have to care about what your employers and parents and professors and customers think, unless you are a subsistence farmer. But maybe you mean peers.
@@penultimateh766 She’s referring to people that cause harm. Not valuable and constructive criticism that might help you in the future.
And no. You don’t gotta always care what your parents say especially knowing there’s emotionally abusive and narcissistic parents. Parents aren’t always right.
@@honeyandlavender_ 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
@@honeyandlavender_ You don't always have to care FOR what your parents say, but you have to care WHAT they say, while you're a teenager. If you ignore them completely, your life will probably be miserable, no matter if they are good or bad.
@@penultimateh766 Especially as a teenager, you have to care WHAT they say even if it’s emotionally damaging? Most of us have to go therapy because others, who actually needed it, never went and they hurt us. That includes family.
I grew up being manipulated to be something I never wanted to be. Not out of rebellion, but it didn’t connect with me and it’s not what I desired in life. They were more focused on *them* being proud, happy and what others thought about me. But I was miserable.
My mother is a very insecure women and she projects herself whenever she comments about my body.
I wished I’d noticed all that when I was younger. I wouldn’t have wasted many years of my life and it would’ve prevented a lot of tears in the shower and depression.
I’m 23 now and I’m still trying to heal.
So please explain to me how is someone going to be miserable, after not caring, even if they’re bad?
I think today, we as teenagers have so much to choose from that it can be overwhelming. We can do pretty much whatever we want, pursue whatever we want, travel wherever we want… This freedom of choice sometimes backfires and leads to a freeze - we won’t actually do anything which may even lead to loneliness. I also sometimes find myself struggling to appreciate what we already have since (in developed countries people live in this colossal abundance). Fortunately I often remind myself of this and thus become a bit more grateful than usual.
I'm 25 and it's so interesting to hear your perspective on how the freedom of choice has crippled many people your age. I might have to make a video about counteracting this :) Loved your re-frame back into gratitude, brother!
you put it into words so well
I am almost 20 and graduated this year and I definitely am in this state of "freeze" because there are so many possibilities and I havent figure out what I wanna do yet. And because of that I am doing not really anything while all people my age are moving out and start to go to university or work... It is very overwhelming. And also lonely because I dont really know someone with a similar experience...
this is reall well put I find myself in his situation way too often being a teen and a really interesting perspective I will do well to remind mself to be grateful, thank you for this!
@@noelleb.8547 whoa heyy! I'm in the same situation actually, being the same age aswell. and all this time I've spent on the internet I've never really found anyone until now... in the same shoes as me, I feel like the world around me is moving on it feels like I'm stuck, wasting my days as you said, it does really get lonely I feel confused all the time. On the bright side, you're not the only who has had this sort of experience. I truly hope you figure things out :D
If I was a teen again I would not play safe. I would learn to work on me while also having fun and enjoying my life. Also not taking ppls opinions too seriously.
Examples would be; read more, go on walks, try to learn about myself. All these things to simply love myself
This is exactly what I had on my mind.
But I think this is an advice that doesn't have to go to the past - it applies to this present moment and might be what your future self would tell your present self.
My best advice to my teenage self would be to put myself in more uncomfortable situations that would challenge me mentally and physically. It really helps in developing discipline and building character. Along with that, I'd also advise myself to not really go with the flow but to take charge of my life. I don't have any regrets but now, in hindsight, I see how both these things would've helped me a lot.
I agree. Especially getting out there and meeting new people and do all the social and extracurricular activities during school time.
I am a teenager and this is definitely something I struggle with! I only have 2 more years of high school. And I need to stop being afraid to fail and embarrass myself or like not take a chance. I need to put myself out there more. Hopefully I can really grow and learn.
As an Introvert teenager (16) who spends all her time at home, I am trying to improve myself as much as I can. Building my confidence. Reading A LOT of books. Learning another Languages. Looking for my passion. Being healthy and kind with my family and friends. Planning for better Life for me in the future. I wanna be that educated, independent, smart, confident and courteous women,
And I will!
Thx for this video, all support 🤍.
Me too
Hi, I'm a teen. Thank you for all of the insight, Lana.
Sometimes when I'm in a group of people who are all scrolling through social media on their phones, I step back and observe. Everyone in their own fake world as life passes by.
However, there is a certain pressure that says "you must enjoy your teenage years before you reach adulthood". Some people consider teenage years to be the epitome of freedom, however I would argue that adults are more free in terms of finance, travel, exposure to more people, and less peer pressure. Many teenagers spend their time contemplating what their future adulthood will look like, and many adults wish they could be young again.
well, we all want that we cant have... its unfortunate but true
"you must enjoy your teenage years before you reach adulthood". ISTG BROOOOO I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT, its always "enjoy being a kid while u can buddy, it only gets worse" but how tf am I supposed to enjoy anything when I have people basically acting like these are my last years to live or something, I'm supposed to enjoy my teenage years with all this pessimism and doomerism about adulthood being shoved down my throat?
Im still a teenager but what I would tell my younger self and what I am telling myself now is to NOT CARE what OTHER people THINK. Much easier said than done tho.
Hi! I am a teenager. I feel like there is a lot of things that is confusing and hard to understand. In my earlier teenage years I felt scared and wanted to fit in everywhere so badly. Now I still want to fit in but I have realized that no one really cares about what I do or say so, it’s okay to talk and express myself. Not being myself is just a waste of time. That is something I regret even though I’m still young. Thanks for your video🤍
I relate you :)
Hey there! I am a teenager as well and I’m still stuck on realizing nobody cares about what you do. Like I feel like I am going to be judged or hated if I don’t act a certain way which is not me being myself. I really would just love to express myself and I currently regret that I can’t make this change and that I care so much about how people talk about me. I don’t know if I’m sensitive or a people pleaser or both but if someone talks bad about me I will try and fix it and try to make them like me again. It’s so exhausting, I’m constantly being nice and kind but I don’t set boundaries leading up to me having to do things I don’t want to do. People end up picking on me and I cave in all over again and shut people out and become very quiet. Writing this down I just made a realization maybe I’m not so introverted as I put myself out to be, but maybe I’m exhausted because I’m constantly trying to be nice to people even if I get hurt. And I don’t joke about things or make comments cause sometimes I don’t feel like I’m valid. Maybe I’m pretty extraverted but all these fears are holding me back. I want to change so badly. I’m so tired of people bringing me down and then I beat myself about it too. But I’m scared of rejection and people hating me cause I try to make people like me. Argh I don’t know what to do. This has been going on since middle school and I can’t seem to break free.
I'm 15 and self-developement is my main concern. However, this year has taught me to reset my WHY- from perfectionism to self love. I've also realized maybe things aren't THAT deep. I have a huge gift of time and I'm learning to balance between spending that time for enjoyment and for work.. both are incredibly vital. Just recently discovered the only way to subside my anxiety and have begun throwing myself at every fear- friends, strangers, work, my UA-cam career, freaking roller coasters. So much fun lol
6:54 That's so true! If you're not much of a socializer, just by being yourself attracts similar people. I was thought as a party-goer and a dater in college when in fact I'm not just by the way I present myself, I'm always dressed up and had makeup on and I was quiet about my interests hence the wrong impression. I stay indoors 80% of the time, listening to music, reading, introspecting, writing, painting, watching youtube, cooking, singing. I like fashion so much, I dress to feel good and confident
If I was a teenager again, I would tell myself to stop being so harsh on myself and hold myself to impossible standards, that everything would be okay. Things would eventually fall into place. I'm still 22 so I'd be telling this to my highschool self (when I was under 18).
Also Lana, indeed it's never too late to learn a musical instrument or continue playing the instrument to reach a higher level! I decided to force myself to learn classic piano when I was 17, when most people start classic piano at a really young age. It was difficult initially, and I quit taking lessons after a year, but I kept practicing on my own. It's been 5 years, I can play more complex pieces now, and I have no regrets! I used to think that I should have started sooner, I could have become a classical pianist or something, but I don't have that kind of regret now. The learning process itself is extremely enjoyable.
Same here, I wish I started early in learning guitar but atleast we know how to play instrument and that is awesome.
i know right! the joy of being able to play some of my favorite pieces (some of them are just too hard for me hahaha), makes me not regret starting, even if it was "late"!
If I were a teenager again, I'd try to ENJOY my life more than what I actually did.
Academic and financial pressure has taken a huge toll on my mental sanity. I wish that this wasn't the case and that I could go back in time and be happy again :(
This is exactly what I'm worried about, that's why I can't enjoy my teenage years cause I'm always worried about the future
I used to think the same way, but it is thanks to your teenage years you have this mindset/understanding now. Heck imo your teenage years and twenties are established to mess up and experience life. Take this as a chance to live your life as you would if it were your teenage years, but it's so much better when you're a little older as you have more independence. I used to think the same way but came to conclusion that I'd do the EXACT same thing if I relived as a teenager, and it was a miserable time. Post teenage years are the best, mentally and physically. I was actually so stressed during my teenage years I looked older than I do now. Best of luck!
@@nikijess6369 good insight
I'm a teen and seeing this video made me realise some things I've been avoiding for a while now. I guess it's time to clean up the mess in my life, thank you Lana!
Hi! As a teen, I think that what concerns me the most is that I'm worried about school exams, grades and I fear to be unsuccessful. This is a big problem that I think prevents me from being truly happy and enjoying more my young life :(
Lot of love from France! 🇫🇷💕
Yes me too. Usually teachers says "Grades are not everything" but I think is just a lie like any other student.
Is true that grades don't rappresent your intelligence but at school if you have bad grades its over.
As an adult, I advice you to focus on your school and also don't forget to enjoy the extracurricular activities. Being an introvert and an extremely insecure girl, I avoided all the social events and trips during my school time. I regret not being a bit more serious in my studies and also not trying to be more social and enjoy my school time because you’ll never ever get these times back. I hope you enjoy your teenage years as much as you can but also be consistent on your studies. Best of luck ❤
Yeah a letter/ number grading can affect us in a positive & negative way. In middle school I wanted to have bad grades to fit in. At the end of high school I started to care. In college I care and when I get low grade it makes me feel like I’m just not smart. But that’s not true. There’s other variables as to why we struggle academically ❤️ for me it’s adhd
You must be a type 3 enneagram.Anyways just remember that grades and school are not everything. Life is so much bigger than that. This sounds harsh but one day you will be gone and all of the stuff you are stressing out about won’t matter. Live life to the fullest, let go, and just have fun. You are only a teenager once so make these years count.
@@bluerose8165 that’s what i thought too, but you know, when i grew up and went to college. I can promise you, they’re right.
Grades are definitely not everything, at least for me!
Sometimes I wish I was a teenager in this era. Not because it would be particularly easier but simply because the world has changed so much that I'd certainly find the strength to keep going and stay true to myself by finding more relatable and trustful role models whose advice that I'd be more likely to accept and appreciate...
@E v e I think you'd still experience the things that teenagers typically do, but at least you'd have a healthier perception of things like body positivity, self-confidence and so on..
@E v e Omg noo
It's so interesting how much has changed for the life of a teenager in this modern world and yet, how much would still be consistent with our teenage years too :)
@@joshmoxey. I agree :-)
Agree. Also, let's not forget the things that we were bullied for as teenagers are cool now. I think my life would be for sure easier as a teenager nowadays
“Be more unafraid to ask questions and let that inner curiosity bloom” Applying this to myself every single day 🌱✨
I wish I had been more confident in my life and followed my gut feelings in pursuing the things I loved doing. Thank you, Lana, for sharing your advice. You are not alone!
I'm almost 19 years old and I'm grateful that I stumbled upon this video. Thank you, Lana!!
I was so focused on school and career. There was no social life to balance it out. I needed more time to have fun and take risks.
Time is so *important*. We waste it and then always wish it back, but it will never come back the way you want it to!
I was amazed at how much you are aware of yourself. I think this is the power of journaling/reflecting 😌
Me, a teen: interesting....
Same here
Sme
Sameee °^°
Same also watching what to do in your 20’s
I always try to be friendly to everybody, regardless of their actions, if I know them or not, the prejudices I have about them etc..
For example when I go jogging and I greet random people with a smile there is nothing better than seeing them smile and greet back!
i am 14 and i really hope to enjoy and make the best out of my teenage years, thank you Lana for being with me in my most precious years, i may not really be the best person out here but i try to be kind to people at my school and class. I try to never skip classes and take care of my studies i am also dancing, cooking, drawing, singing, reading and i wrote 2 books by now ! I really like how i feel that i am doing my best, i also have a crush on someone like any teenager but i know i could never have that someone, and it's okay ! Because sometimes we meet people that teach us lessons to not make those mistakes again, i am also reading Agatha Christie and Dostoievskie cause i rlly love those type of books, to everyone here around my age, enjoy your years and be kind to your self, love your self the way you are cause we are all made by the same thing in the end of the day :)
I haven't had a crush in forever because I'm spending my teen years isolated, brutal
Soooo true and so good to hear this! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and lots of love from Germany 🤍
If I was a teenager again, I would take things in an easier way. When you are young things happen in your life and you think they are definite but they are not. Oh god if I knew that I would have made some completely different decisions
I'm so impressed by Lana's comment section, every time!
Thank youuu. I was exactly thinking about how can I be a "better" teenager so, in future, I'll not regret what I done.
How I wish I knew most of these things and took more risks when I was still a teenager. I felt like I just wasted my teenage years living out of fear.
@E v e amazing technique
I’m a teenager living off of fear, two more years of high school. I am just trying to look for ways to improve so these last two years I can actually enjoy myself instead of going to school thinking I’m going to embarrass myself or try to please people.
Lana knows how to upload on the right time when people need to hear a positive message the most.
@@Wackaz you speak as if you know her. You do not know her, no one here does. You have a fragmented tunnel vision of reality your self and place your subjective idea-forms onto the rest of society. Not all people suffer from lack of financial stability, there are many poor people in this world who are very content with life. Suffering is not the only reaction one feels there are other higher states of being that can be embodied. Your label-placing political mind is limiting and fails to see the relative nature of all-life.
@@Wackaz maybe she objects capitalism but considers it the most accurate and suitable ( and flawed system, which "all" systems are)...just like i do...maybe you could peek into some history of horrors of WW2...prolly you'd have a second thought coming regarding marxist utopia...🙂 good vibes!
If I was a teenager, I would live *MORE* in the moment. When you're at that young age, you're in a point of your life where you have the *opportunity* to make mistakes, get out there and *LEARN* more about yourself. Once you get to a certain age, you need to be more 'responsible' and make smarter decisions... so there's little room to explore yourself, without facing more serious consequences. Life's too short, enjoy it! 💪🏻
This!
@@auguste573 You want to live life without regrets. Don't fear embarrassment, fear never having the opportunity to do something again. It's so much worse
Well, I would suggest those risks NOT include unprotected sex, drunk driving, dissing your teachers, etc.
Really
cope, there's no reason u can't do those things now and what kind of things are u even talking about anyway?
I’d tell myself to be less afraid of failure and just take things less seriously. Of course work hard and try your best in things, but realize some things are just not meant for everyone, and it’s ok to try different things that you might be more willing to work for. Teenage years especially are truly just for learning and experimenting, it’s hard to do so with a very fixed mindset.
i havent explored anything
Totally agree with what you said about being more considerate. Most of my life I'd been bullied by my peers which made me see them shallowly, only as bullies. Now that I realised, their bullying oftentimes stemmed from the immaturity of our adolescent years. My pain that they had caused most probably hadn't stemmed from their evilness, but rather the mistake that they made when having fun at the expense of other people's happiness. Looking at this now, this experience gives me the opportunity to play "the big sister" in my head to educate those bullies alike & to calm down the pain that my adolescent self has experienced back then. It was an overall eye-opening experience & it would be nice if I had realised all these back then.
Thanks for your advice! Being a teenager is overwhelming at times, but I just have to remember to enjoy it and be myself.
One thing I would tell my younger self is all those times you would cry because you wished you could hug yourself when you felt alone and in pain. YOU CAN! And you can do much more that just that. Learn to heal 🤍 Learn that pain is inevitable ✨
as a teenager now, my main concerns are things such as school, my future, identity and also our changing climate. it feels quite hard to focus on what’s really important in life, when there’s something bad always happening. also the social media can feel pretty overwhelming. personally, i’m dealing with an eating disorder and other mental health
issues and finding out the balance between my health, my future and society’s expectations is a hard work… but if something positive, your videos are really inspiring for me❤️
Same, i also having a hard time appreciating other beauty without doubting my own. But I know we can get through of this.You are not alone and remember theres always light in the end of the tunnel. Have a good day🍃🍂lovelots❤️
I spent 20 years caring so much about what the people around me thought and now I’m moving half way across the world and chances are I’ll never see these people again. I missed out on so many opportunities because i didn’t want people’s perception of me to change. I guess it’s important to know that the people you grow up with are probably not the people you’re going to flourish with
If it makes you feel any better take this as an opportunity. You have this understanding thanks to your teenage years. I truly believe teenage years and even your twenties are there for one to learn and mess up. See the following years as your new era where you can apply whatever you've learned, and trust me it feels so much better than being a teenager! Best of luck
My teenage phase is currently starting, and this video really helps. I also learn a lot from the comments.
Thank you! LOVE FROM PHILIPPINES
it's so great that you've been able to get some good solid advice before you became a teenager, myself and most other teenagers didn't, and for me personally it made the whole experience a lot more difficult.
As a teenager I’m so glad I discovered you :)
Although my daughter is still a child, I will take your advice into account together with my own past experience when the time comes. Thank you for your thoughts.
You're amazing i was surfing yt instead of studying when i found this video you've motivated me smch i hope ill carry this
Lana, thank you for an awesome video. As always😍
Honestly it hurts a bit thinking about those years. It seems like so many mistakes were made and I should've done much better. A lot.
But it's life. I guess we all get smarter and wiser and even kinder (sometimes) growing up.
My favorite quote from your video is "the more you care about fitting in, the less you fit it".
Couldn't agree more.
Thank you, Lana.
ahh the first one you said about dreams not having to be ONLY dreams resonate with me a lot. i also dream big but never thought i could bring those dreams into my reality until after i graduated university. prior to this, i made major life decisions as a teen that didn't at all align with what i really wanted for myself because (prior to graduating uni) i believed my dreams were impractical and simply meant to be dreams.
now as someone 2 years into the non-student life, i work very hard to keep this ambitious spirit alive to make conscientious decisions that make sense with what i really want.
Being a teen , this will be really helpful to me ✨ thank you Lana❤️
I have the same regrets, from picking a sport, an instrument and specially being truthful to yourself to fit in. I'm aware now that I'm 27 about most things wrong in my life and I'm trying to be the person I love the most to find my place in the world.
Thanks I specially liked the "Dreams don't have to always be dreams part" it gave me more hope to know that I can "make it happen"
Lana , I have aged like 5 damn years since 2020 .... I am just 16 but here's a piece of advice I would give to my younger self :
Don't think about people, they don't think about you at all . They judge you just because they have time and they have a mouth to talk (shit)
Don't think much . You are not wrong if you have a diff opinion speak up ! You don't have to be wrong or right . You do you .
Your body is your only home , don't compare it be grateful that you have it ! It's ok if you get a big pimple on u r nose, if you are overweight.. it's ok ! You are just "not healthy" but you have been , are and will be always BEAUTIFUL ♡ (you have power to change the unhealthy you by some good habits leading to good lifestyle)
Don't spend much time scrolling on yt on bad days , get up, take a hot shower, go on a walk , journal , meditate (even if you don't want to ! Do it ) ... Take a break if you are tired , it doesn't mean you have to give up . Also - Don't fall into bad patterns just because you know them ...
One last thing....- Don't cut your arms instead ask for help . Know ,Accept and Embrace yourself and your journey of life. Believe and pray to something
Now that I am getting better I regret it , seeing those scars hurts me but reminds me that I am Warrior who fought and never give up (I am crying while writing this , I think I never appreciated myself enough :( )
Lana , thank u so much . I grateful to have a virtual sister like you ! So much love dear .
Ich liebe dich 🌻💛
Sending my love to Stockholm for you and 🐶
I would choose to be “average weight” though,I think I would choose to be healthy mentally and physically.
@@heh822 yes ! All the best :))
That was so beautiful written. I wish you all the best. Take good care of yourself always.
@@moved4567 thank you so much ! I wish u the same !
I would like to add that being healthy counts as self care! Of course you should love yourself whether you're over weight or not, but being physically healthy is extremely important and also helps with your mental health! You shouldn't obsess over weight, but if you're trying to improve yourself and live the best life possible, losing or gaining weight to a healthy level should definitely be a priority.
Please never stop doing what you are doing Lana! You're such an inspiration! :) I'm deeply humbled that I can watch these videos and absorb the wisdom that you share. :)
As a teen …… I was with a group of people since I didn’t wanna be alone and not because I wanted to be , I always felt left out and alone around them so I left now I’m mostly alone and doing things myself , I’m just 14 and I’m enjoying things by myself so don’t be afraid of being alone and it won’t really make you sad after a few days I think you would love doing things that you really love by yourself, a little story I have a friend who is 80 years old ( that’s my grandma 😭🤣) who also love spending her time alone and now we do things together like get flowers and go on walks in the streets of Denmark so the moral is your lonely grandparents can be the best buddies you ever had !!!! I love all of you so much
I would really reflect about what really matters to me and focus on that instead of other peoples opinions! But I feel like that's so much harder when you're younger 🌻
Hi! Thank you for the advice :) I'm 16, so from my perspective as a teenager social media has kind of just made everything worse. People are more distant, and meaner, I've noticed, and unhappier as well. We don't feel as motivated to do even things we really love, especially as it becomes harder and harder to succeed in life (dropping college acceptance rates, inflation, etc etc) and we find ourselves bogged down with inane amounts of work to try and fight the despairing feeling of imminent failure. However, it's also a time where everyone sort of just "gets it," if that makes sense. There's no one who you can't say something about feeling down about technology and where the world is headed who won't know precisely what you're talking about. So it's more isolated, but more connected at the same time. Ironic, huh.
When I was a teen I’m thankful that I stuck to who I was and I didn’t conform to what people wanted me to be. It’s not easy but later on in life it brings a satisfaction that can’t be taken away from you and it builds character. My advice to teens is build character which is love, joy or being cheerful, peace or calmness, patience, kindness, faithfulness or loyalty, and self control which is self discipline. These things will catapult you in life in whatever you do.
Thanks for the video! Really enjoyed it. I am a teen and I have concerns I guess for our over-consumption of information/stimulation from phones, social media, etc. I feel like that many of us don’t have much time truly by ourselves anymore. Leaving not much time to reflect upon ourselves properly. Leaving not much time to be in quiet.
Exactly what I needed. Thank you Lana!
As a teen i always felt i needed to "prepare" or be "ready" to do something and sadly i wasted my teenage years doing just that.
Relatable!
my concern is people, including myself, spending lots of time on social media. i personally spend so much time on discord. really, the only other "hobby" i have that i really enjoy is reading. i used to write a lot when i was younger, and i do journal frequently.
last week though i only went on social media for about 10-20 minutes a day and ive felt a lot more present. i didn't have to worry about anyone or "do" anything. while i am happy on discord (im talking with my friends!) i feel as if i should spend less time on it and find/do more hobbies purely for myself, and to grow.
Me too.
Thank you Lana Im still 16, going through a lot earlier I felt so down but after watching ur vid and reading some comments you guys saved me from drowning in my own thoughts, Thank you again.
well since I am a teenager this was very helpful
love your channel Lana:)
“Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you’ll be criticized anyway.”
I am a teenager and this video made my day!
I am a teen and so far I do regreat some things I did in the past but I would not change anything because those mistakes made me a better person, the person that I am today.
I’m in my 20s and I’ve just recently given up my life and my hopes and dreams I left my job and now I have more time to do what I enjoy. I’m also a minimalist and I enjoy the smaller things in life .
What i stress about is being the best and realest version of myself, means experience life, loneliness etc. and still have loved ones i truly love
Though you couldn't go back in time to tell your teenage self these things, you've just told them to this teenage me and it is exacty what she has always needed to hear
Leave everything aside. I fell in love with her voice. ❤️❤️❤️
lana you’re my own mentor beside my parents
I never skip a bit
Your voice and the way you explain made em keep watching
I just started college and I absolutely hate it because I’m an introvert and it’s so difficult for me to talk to people but somehow this video made me feel better, thanks❤️
I love how you explain to be kind. Most people these days focus on being selfish and mean. They believe it's called character development. We'll I don't if they are right or wrong. But what you are explaining seems right
Me as a 15 year old boy, am concerned about not being good enough for achieving all this dreams a I have, cause I don't really want a simple life but I know these things will be hard to achieve and I will have to put real effort on it.. so I've been studying daily this things I would use as tools to get to where I want to: algebra, programming, chess, music, web design, but the last week I've been losing motivation and haven't done anything... So I'm concerned about not being able to put myself back to study all this things... But if I want to be able to live like I would like then I will have to... And I guess it is okay rest sometimes... And just not get overwhelmed.
I'm 15 and I'm incredibly glad I stumbled upon this video :D
the way u speak is honestly so inspiring! As a teen, listening to you speak sounds like having an older sister :)) you should really start a podcast ❤️
Thank you
@@LanaBlakely you Chanel super supported 👍😄💕💕💕💕
Yes you can
Ask questions
Stick to one sport (swim)
Stick to instrument (guitar, piano, drums)
Be friendly not friend to all
Be authentic and don’t make things up
Be kinder for no reason and be all selfless and see people as people
Thank you SO much. I feel like I attrack the wrong people and your tip to be myself even more in those situations, to attrackt the right people helped me tremendously ❤❤❤❤
Thank you, I’m glad that I heard this at 15❤️
Yah me too
I am teenager and I learnt so much from this video like
1. Recently I have friendshiped a party person who likes dancing and singing in hope that it will bring more enthusiasm in life but.. I am a booky not a party .
2. I don't want to admit but yes , I think I have limiting believes about myself about what I know and sometimes I feel afraid but from now onwards I will go towards my dreams and learn in between .
3. Sports , I like them but I still don't like them this has been my persona for the people around me and I feel awkward to show them that I want to play . I always thought it to be for future thing .
Lana , really beautiful video !! :-)
But my experience through teenage - I feel like growing and an urge to keep growing and learning and living . I am very lively person (with myself) . :-D
hi i am a teen!!! i am watching this and i am so thankful for you!!!! your so pretty, definitely watching more of your videos!
i m watching this as a teenager ,idk if i have to say yayyyy or cry cause i needed to hear this.
Thank you BEAUTIFUL
Do not be fast to call a person your friend.
Love the editing on this one Lana, you videos are always entertaining and very informational. I defenetly feel like i go really long times without journaling even tho its such a simple task. It shows how distracting this world is. Thanks again 🐥.
Be kind always, especially to yourself 💕
I just finished a K-drama called Reply 1988 and it happened to talk about the experiences of a group of teenage friends that grow up in the same neighborhood together. Their naive but passionate hearts, struggles, and their first love made me think a lot about my youth (I'm 25 now and I know I'm still young but of course not the same as my 18 years old me) and now I came across this video of Lana. I felt like we all have something we wish we did differently. I realized in those years, I had been affected by others' opinions and made my decision based on my parents' expectations and social convention so that somehow I missed to be an authentic me. I was trying to fit in, studying crazily so I could achieve what was considered "practical" and "stable" for the future. I wish I trusted my intuition and myself more. I was also afraid to confront or call out mean behaviors. I was an emotional person but always acted like I'm chill and indifferent. Now I have changed my mindset and actually be me. I feel like I could finally breathe and live my life...
I wish, I had someone who taught me all these in my teenage years, it could be less vulnerable if i knew them. Apart from that ,these all are very important and necessary facts you talked about.
Anyone who's a teenager please listen lana and follow these steps, believe me your life will be better.
Every single video has a content from which you can learn! I'm glad that I subscribed to her channel
Such a great video! Thank you soo much for this!
Thank you
As a teenager, I try to enjoy my life with what I have and to make the best out of little things. I make sure to go out even if that means at the grocery store with my mom only to spend time with her. I volunteer at a library and enjoy finding people who match my energy. I first take few pictures and then spend the rest of the time enjoying the moment. I have a small obsession with boys however I always find a way to ground myself and love myself by journaling or going for a run for fun. I now feel older and more grown up than I did in middle school.💞
If I had one piece of advice for my teenage self, I’d say to not wait to do something until it’s too late. Now nearly 22, I’m constantly stressed about all the things I need to do… when I could’ve had them all done earlier
Woah , I am 16 and I feel like that now
@@Sunflower_that_loves_you well, maybe you can take something from this.
@@bri1317 nonsense… it’s a perfect age to be stressed at.
@@bri1317 I understand what you’re saying. I appreciate your words! It’s just a lot harder said than done you know? I think maybe if you knew my situation, then maybe you would understand why I feel the way I do.
@@pizzapie7 yes , I am taking action and not wasting time :)
as a 16 yr old teen, i feel like its true that everything revolves around social media. sometimes i wish i hadn’t been exposed to much social media
im a teen and I don't know what to do in my teen years rn . But watching this vid and reading the comments kinda helped me . Well im still finding what should i change but yeah ,reading comments helped me
thanks for this up close and personal insights ,very helpful and really inspiring.
as a 14, almost 15 year old, your advice is still really relevant, i fully agree with being kinder and being authentic because it can hard and exhausting to chase the wrong people out and attract the right people into your life as a young person, and in the future it can leave you thinking "why didn't i do this when i could have?"
I'm still a teen but advice I would give to my younger self is
1. To care less, learn to spend time alone as its the way you would know about yourself without seeking validation from anyone
2.There's no rush in finding out what you want to do in life its time to explore everything just live as a teen
3.Value your inner peace more than anything
The social media and the separation due to the pandemic must be quite a challenge for those who are teens now. We could listen more to teens... with the intention to understand, to really connect ☀️