When Your Spouse Hurts You |

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 738

  • @Postulatedstate
    @Postulatedstate 4 місяці тому +5

    "The best person does the right thing first."

  • @totalbodybeauty4832
    @totalbodybeauty4832 5 років тому +166

    I resonated so much with the woman who wrote that question, and when I listen to you and Karen talk about how your marriage used to be, it's like I'm looking at my marriage in the mirror. Showing redemptive love is so hard, especially when your spouse isn't changing or doesn't see how he's hurting you. Some days are so hard and emotionally exhausting, today being one of them, but I'm trying to keep doing it. One of the hardest parts for me is changing how I react or respond because I go into instant protect mode and standing up for myself, but I have to let God do that. I'm definitely a work in progress, and I pray that my marriage is healed one day. Thank you both for your ministry.

    • @rachelsroyals
      @rachelsroyals 4 роки тому +1

      TotalBodyBeauty same 🙏

    • @totalbodybeauty4832
      @totalbodybeauty4832 4 роки тому

      Brian woo, thank you!

    • @lmvc9204
      @lmvc9204 3 роки тому +5

      Hey TotalBodyBeauty how are you doing ? How is your marriage going ? I just came across your message and I am pretty much going thru the same thing as you were going Thru I am hoping you are doing well and may God keep blessing you and your husband

    • @totalbodybeauty4832
      @totalbodybeauty4832 3 роки тому +7

      @@lmvc9204 thank you! I'm doing well...God is still working on everything, but He has really allowed me to see mt husband through His eyes and love him unconditionally. I still have great hope that God is going to do something great! I pray that God heals and blesses your marriage also!

    • @nwankaanze7018
      @nwankaanze7018 3 роки тому +3

      Remain blessed sister. We can be stubborn at times, trust the HOLY SPIRIT to break us when time is right

  • @matthewcanfield6748
    @matthewcanfield6748 11 місяців тому +35

    This is powerful. My wife and i were hurt, angry, and almost divorced i couldnt let go of anger. Finally, God softened my heart, i have forgiven her. my love for her is more than its ever been. God is good

    • @A22208
      @A22208 7 місяців тому +2

      How did you pray? God change my heart? God change her? I am not quite grasping how to get God and I to work together

    • @shawnjenkins7469
      @shawnjenkins7469 7 місяців тому +3

      I’m there right now and praying for a chance to treat my wounded wife the way God called me to. Thank you for sharing your story. I need to believe there is still hope.

    • @Enough2123
      @Enough2123 6 місяців тому

      Starts with humility. I’d recommend reading the Bait of Satan John Bevere and Self-centeredness the source of all grief by Andrew Wommack.

    • @candlehatchett9911
      @candlehatchett9911 5 місяців тому +2

      Im changing. He refuses. I can't ask any questions, or he turns it on me, won't do anything to be a part of the solution, stays away, uses fear and control. But was the one who did the selfish act. I prayed I would be a wife and God would help me. I'm mindful he's not. And if he doesn't feel like im kissing his butt even though he's the one who did something questionable. He will punish me and say cruel things. Now I will not tolerate his behavior at this point. I will go to him for answers. Of course I don't get any so now I just keep to myself. I'm so close to walking. He's too much. Wheres the Christ in him? I'm serving God I do my best to take the high road and he smashes it time and time again.

    • @abigailthesnail88
      @abigailthesnail88 4 місяці тому

      I love this!!! I am praying for this in my marriage as well. I have faith it will be rejuvenated, but I know it takes time and that’s the most difficult part

  • @bojos5
    @bojos5 5 років тому +100

    Married being a wife the hardest thing I’ve done in my life! I’ve always run to God I ask God take my hand carry me through and He always does ! Praise God 🌼 I love Jesus 🌺 so much !

    • @kimacker5615
      @kimacker5615 3 роки тому +1

      Amen, I can relate 100%!

    • @bko5489
      @bko5489 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/7O2yN9iGutw/v-deo.html

  • @THERetiredHomeskoolMomma
    @THERetiredHomeskoolMomma 6 років тому +98

    This video was the HARDEST PILL I EVER HAD TO SWALLOW...thank u for this teaching👏🏾👏🏾❤️

  • @dorcas706
    @dorcas706 4 роки тому +55

    my husband just hurt my feelings,listening to this has taken that hurt away .thankyou Jesus

    • @donnacollings472
      @donnacollings472 4 роки тому

      All thanks to Dr Aguiyi for helping me get back the love of my life🥰🥰🥰
      Are you in need of Spiritual help? Do you want your Ex back? Do you need business breakthrough? Do you need marriage spell? Do you need Good luck spell? Kindly email Dr Aguiyi via email (aguiyispellcaster@gmail.com)Or what app him (+2348151642717) And get any kind of spell you want. Doctor Aguiyi helped me get the love of my life and we are happily married for now and that is why i am posting this review for people who are also in need of love spell and other kinds of problem.

  • @miainformed3657
    @miainformed3657 Рік тому +38

    Verbal abuse is damaging, it’s just as hurtful as physical abuse.

    • @Postulatedstate
      @Postulatedstate 4 місяці тому +1

      It's hard when the other is never sorry

    • @tracieelrod7018
      @tracieelrod7018 6 днів тому

      I would rather he beat me up… the words that come out of his mouth… I just sit and beg him to stop

  • @nataliefields8873
    @nataliefields8873 6 років тому +426

    Its hard when only one person wants it more than the other!!!

    • @VincentNBridgetMoses
      @VincentNBridgetMoses 6 років тому +126

      Natalie Fields I agree, but I know from experience that if you continue loving him and meeting his needs, God will work on his heart and your man will notice that you are treating him better than he deserves & it will make him change. At 1st when I began redemptively loving my husband he acted out (going overboard by pointing out EVERY mistake I made, & snapping at me and blowing up) because my loving him (not snapping back at him or arguing with him, meeting All of his needs with a GOOD attitude even when I'm tired - yes even sex & making sure that I do it with a GOOD attitude even though I've been hurt so badly, encouraging & building him up by telling him IN DETAIL that I appreciate the things that he does for me) made him insecure because of the way HE was treating ME. I KNOW that it's hard, but hang in there! Just like it says in the Bible, love NEVER FAILS!!! Every time that I have responded in love, it never has failed! It isn't easy, I know, but it is SO worth it!!! They may not deserve it, but we didn't deserve Jesus dying for us & forgiving our sins either! Remember that God loves each of us the same no matter what, & NONE of us deserve it! Continue to be the stronger person by loving him redemptively, I have faith that you can! If I can, I KNOW that anyone can!!! Just be careful to be open to him when he starts back trying to love you, I found that I was so angry at 1st that I was pushing him away when he tried to give me attention, & I had to address that RIGHT AWAY because I didn't want to push him away. In order to effectively redeem your spouse you have to be EXTREMELY intentional in EVERYTHING that you do until the healing process gets to a point where you can relax in it more. Otherwise it's easy to fall into the negative patterns of how you FEEL, which will defeat the purpose. May God continue to bless and cover you, & give you the strength and grace needed to redeem your spouse!!! 💜 💜 💜

    • @niks8521
      @niks8521 6 років тому +28

      Bridget Moses, u couldn't have said it better!! I've gone thru the EXACT same process & I'll be darned if that process really does work! I'll admit, it was hard as heck, but God helped me thru it bc He saw my genuine effort. Remain encouraged!

    • @VincentNBridgetMoses
      @VincentNBridgetMoses 6 років тому +22

      Nik S I really do find it SO encouraging to hear about other's successes in their marriages/lives! When we do marriage God's way it works! May God continue to bless and cover you and your family!!! 💜 💜 💜

    • @jeaninesmith1978
      @jeaninesmith1978 6 років тому +14

      I am finding it to be very hard to redemptively love my spouse. I find myself pushing him away when he begins to open up because I am so hurt and angry. How can I do this, how can I redemptively love my spouse? I am so close to filing for a divorce but I love my husband and I want my marriage. How do I do it, redemptively love my spouse?

    • @kitongpusa
      @kitongpusa 5 років тому +14

      @@niks8521 does it work for a woman? I hurt my wife a lot of times to the point that she wanted me out of the house. I suspect her things she did not do. She loved me but fell out of love because she felt me being needy and I let her control the marriage. I know she is still trying to reconnect but all I did still caused her a lot of pain. I regret all the things I've done and want to show her how much I've changed. I really love my wife.

  • @sumayyaakapery8616
    @sumayyaakapery8616 5 років тому +198

    I'm Muslim and I love these videos! God bless u sir

    • @janefarrer2868
      @janefarrer2868 5 років тому +25

      Jesus is knocking on your 💓He loves you more than you can ever imagine, would you receive his redeeming love?

    • @mirna3649
      @mirna3649 4 роки тому +12

      @@janefarrer2868 leave her alone

    • @angeladillard2682
      @angeladillard2682 4 роки тому +13

      mi rna36
      You’re in the wrong mi rna36 !
      There are only 2 commandments in the New Testament.... the first one is to ❤️ the Lord your God- with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your might.....
      The second commandment in the New Testament is to love your neighbor as yourself.... if you love your neighbor, you would want them to know the truth.... to have a chance to escape hell and to enter into life eternal.... but if your only concern is for your own salvation, that is not loving your neighbor- therefore, you have broke the 2nd commandment... and their blood is on your hands!
      Share the gospel and the love of Jesus Christ and let them make their own decision! God Bless you

    • @mirna3649
      @mirna3649 4 роки тому

      @@angeladillard2682 get lost when u die u'll see whose in the wrong

    • @angeladillard2682
      @angeladillard2682 4 роки тому +10

      mi rna36
      Yes... you are correct on this... “every knee shall bow.... EVERY tongue will confess, that Jesus a Christ is Lord!

  • @janefarrer2868
    @janefarrer2868 5 років тому +82

    In Jesus name may this teaching bring abundant healing to many marriages, amen.

  • @cyemw777
    @cyemw777 5 років тому +154

    Try so hard to communicate with love and patience. It is returned with anger, gaslighting, blaming and poisonous accusations every time. I give up. It's all your Jesus. 🙏😪

    • @vette3839
      @vette3839 5 років тому +12

      I feel your pain....I’m an Apostolic Woman as well.I have an appointment to see a divorce attorney to get advice should I seek a divorce. I am faithful, yet that doesn’t seem to be enough and I have prayed but feel God hasn’t answered me yet.

    • @tubailey2459
      @tubailey2459 5 років тому +15

      Check out Leslie Vernick’s “Emotional Destructive Marriage” she’s a Christian counselor and author who helps women in emotionally destructive marriages

    • @m.magdalenedieujusternfutu3309
      @m.magdalenedieujusternfutu3309 5 років тому +12

      @@vette3839 you state your title as if it means something however it shows alot about people who need to have title aware. Your statement contradict the word of God.
      We as women have to get out of our emotions stop looking to man for answers. Look to God for all the Answers which is the word. Gods word doesn't change due to our emotions or current situation/s. We need to speak the word or dont speak at all especially when it comes to advice or moral support.
      GOD HATES DIVORCE. This goes for covenant spouse(1st marriage anything outside of that is adultery when covenant spouse is still alive)
      Two options for true believer
      1. Stay single or 2. Reconciliation
      Marriage is not easy but with God it can last. Standing for your marriage to be restore is not easy however there are others standing as well on the promise of God restoration.
      Rejoice Marriage Minister a great tool for those of us who are standing on the word of God concerning marriage restoration.

    • @m.magdalenedieujusternfutu3309
      @m.magdalenedieujusternfutu3309 5 років тому +6

      Check into Rejoice Marriage Minister. Am walking similar path trust its not a walk in the park. But with God and trusting in the word we can overcome. Our emotions will cause us to miss the move of God. We have to get our emotions under control. And allow God to be fully in control and that's another journey in itself 😉

    • @NW-educ-advo-DV
      @NW-educ-advo-DV 4 роки тому +3

      @@m.magdalenedieujusternfutu3309 Wow you are great at twisting Scripture. Have fun with that.

  • @flobaf6788
    @flobaf6788 2 роки тому +14

    U can only defeat a spirit with the opposite spirit. That's deep

  • @dempress3549
    @dempress3549 3 роки тому +30

    I just listened to this msg and I believe Yahweh led me to it during my three days of praying and fasting, this msg touched my heart and my spirit, I have the kind of husband that has been hurt so much in the past starting from his mother up to the last marriage that he was in after trying to make it work for 31 years, he lived by himself after that for 5 years devoting that time to God and not really wanting to have another woman in his life again until Yahweh caused our paths to cross, God put us together, this we are certain of, but it really isn't easy sometimes but I have seen God come through for me in the past and I KNOW he will do it again, so I have decided to try this method because it's scriptural, I'm trusting God bcuz I KNOW He WILL honor this....thank you so much for this msg, God bless you, your ministry and your family 🙏

    • @virginiarush8541
      @virginiarush8541 Рік тому

      If his wife of 31 years is still living, then he's not your husband and God certainly didn't put you together. God will only restore this man to his true covenant wife, not you. It will never work, if that ex spouse is still living. God will never give you restoration with a man that doesn't belong to you!

    • @unforkyours3lf730
      @unforkyours3lf730 Рік тому

      Wow I'm on my 4th day of fasting

  • @ezraarel8418
    @ezraarel8418 Рік тому +10

    Brothers and sisters please pray for me & my spouse. I’m standing for my prodigal & I’m in spiritual warfare with double mindedness, spirit of addiction & enmity!

  • @emmankwen1804
    @emmankwen1804 Рік тому +7

    Marriage is no joke. Such teachings should be taught to singles before they get married so they know it’s more than just butterfly feelings😅 Marriage can be wonderful when we are willing to learn and grow but a nightmare when we decide to remain in our pride of being right.

  • @akaajg
    @akaajg 3 роки тому +19

    This message is hard to hear while my wounds are fresh but I'm very glad I heard it bless all of you.

  • @pumkinlove6056
    @pumkinlove6056 5 років тому +59

    Thank you. I have been forgiven many times by our great Lord. I can only repay the same back. My husband doesn’t understand why I don’t give up on him. I give it to your my Lord to help him see the joy of love and forgiveness. Thank you Lord for showing me how to love❣️🙏🏼

    • @navaneethakrishnan4317
      @navaneethakrishnan4317 5 років тому

      #pumkinlove💞
      If you want your ex back and yourr marriage restored,make haste to contact Dr NaNa via whatsapp; + 2 3 4 8 1 3 2 4 9 4 8 0 2.

  • @Thechristianrealtor
    @Thechristianrealtor 3 роки тому +23

    Wooooooow biggest take away “TREAT YOUR HUSBAND LIKE HE WAS JESUS” 🙌🏻♥️

  • @yenboeing575
    @yenboeing575 5 років тому +96

    This is so difficult to do in the midst of anger.

    • @queenc8280
      @queenc8280 4 роки тому +1

      Agreed

    • @jilliandiaz7534
      @jilliandiaz7534 4 роки тому +4

      I agree with you. That's why God has to deal with my heart and I have to surrender to the Lord first.xoxo

    • @Guidedsteps17
      @Guidedsteps17 6 місяців тому

      But there’s rewards from Jesus if you act right if you act in the flesh, u will suffer more

  • @mmonnink6434
    @mmonnink6434 3 роки тому +8

    Finding my way back to God was the best thing that ever happened to me. Even though my world fell apart, I’m still standing due to His infinite love. As long as we put Him as our center in life we can’t go wrong and overcome things that seem impossible to overcome. I continue to love my wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it, I can’t love to his capacity but I can rely on Him to help me to love my wife regardless of her reciprocating.

  • @Drisco757
    @Drisco757 6 років тому +38

    "The best person does the right thing first" 🙆👐 ... I need to post that on the wall all over my house!

  • @Leona000
    @Leona000 3 роки тому +45

    Just had my 30th wedding anniversary. It's hard to believe we've made it that long. We are like chalk and cheese. We both love the Lord but can't seem to get it together. I'm praying for a miracle...that the Lord would soften our hearts so that we can have the marriage that He intended.

    • @vivienkittel3063
      @vivienkittel3063 2 роки тому +3

      Praying with you. I found Laura Doyle's books really helpful ♥

    • @jerinablackwell3237
      @jerinablackwell3237 2 роки тому +1

      How did you make it so long [if I may ask] if you are like chalk and cheese ( nice 🙂 analogy I've never heard before but WILL be using it so thank you 😊).

    • @jerinablackwell3237
      @jerinablackwell3237 2 роки тому +1

      Congratulations!!!🎉👏 by the way ❤️🙏🏼

    • @civette123
      @civette123 2 роки тому

      Prayers for you 💞🙌

    • @civette123
      @civette123 2 роки тому

      And your husband

  • @terrysimmons5523
    @terrysimmons5523 5 років тому +31

    What about Love must be tough? It’s disrespectful to yourself to lovingly accept an ongoing unfaithful spouse. Make him choose.

  • @monkeymankyle
    @monkeymankyle 7 років тому +53

    It's hard at times and I so want to not go through the pain but I will continue to love my husband through this time and believe for total healing and redemption

    • @wonderland99999
      @wonderland99999 6 років тому

      Kelly Sanders 0c00xdxddxdddd c

    • @socare44
      @socare44 6 років тому +1

      Kelly Sanders I love you

    • @raneetablog
      @raneetablog 6 років тому +2

      Kelly Sanders prayers and love you

    • @GodReignsForever321
      @GodReignsForever321 6 років тому +3

      Please do get Christian counseling. They should help you to have Biblical boundaries. We are called to forgive, to turn the other cheek, but even Jesus didn't let people do whatever they wanted, when it wasn't God's will. When some people tried to kill him He just walked off. It wasn't the right time. So that tells me Christians don't have to "accept" all abuse.... what we really need to do is be a "Mary" at His feet, and let Him lead, and things work out well that way. God bless you and your husband.

  • @PFlower15
    @PFlower15 4 роки тому +8

    I want a husband that only wants me and is lucky to have me, not a husband who wants other women.. I hope God blesses me one day cause I deserve better.. ♥️

  • @JMarieTaylor
    @JMarieTaylor 4 роки тому +9

    Wow! These videos hit me. I am realizing that I am in a place that I hindering not only myself but having the marriage that God created me and my husband to have. I want to change all the clutter that is still inside of me so that it may become the best version of myself. Just learning how to trewt my husband as I would treat Jesus hit home. I would never treat Jesus the way I treat my husband. I am almost in tears at work. TY for this video. No more excuses!

  • @jadrea2817
    @jadrea2817 4 роки тому +118

    This unfortunately doesn’t work with everyone... some men just thrive on treating their wife easily disposable.

    • @BigTroubleD
      @BigTroubleD 3 роки тому +10

      I’ve been there for sure. They completely take you for granted and rather than own up to what they do to kill the relationship, they’d rather throw you away like yesterday’s trash and find someone else.

    • @potapotapotapotapotapota
      @potapotapotapotapotapota 3 роки тому +20

      Without God, all men and women treat other people harshly. It is a negative cycle that just gets worse and worse. What do you expect? Hurt people hurt people.

    • @MrNaruchimaru
      @MrNaruchimaru 3 роки тому +9

      Those men aren’t good men. A person should never be treated as disposable.

    • @jadrea2817
      @jadrea2817 3 роки тому +2

      I suffer from anxiety and recently my partner walked away just because he didn’t think it was suitable to understand. Which adds to my anxiety 😥.

    • @DarkGloComics
      @DarkGloComics 3 роки тому +2

      And vice versa. Mine did that.

  • @daughterofthemosthighheliv6065
    @daughterofthemosthighheliv6065 4 роки тому +3

    Our God is the same yesterday today and forever. Again Ps Jimmy you have saved 20 more sessions of counseling. My tongue my tongue my tongue. This thing in my mouth has to change

  • @shellbell8062
    @shellbell8062 5 років тому +10

    What a great message and so counterintuitive to love, respect and redeem someone who is hurting you, blaming you or being unfair or hostile. Truly amazing

  • @Ed-vi8lj
    @Ed-vi8lj 2 роки тому +3

    The best advice I received is take time for yourself. Spend time on reflecting on yourself, relationship, and family. Slow down

  • @mchristr
    @mchristr 5 років тому +24

    Thank you for the encouragement. God graciously changed me first but my wife isn't there yet. We are legally divorced but I'm going to stand for reconciliation.

    • @navaneethakrishnan4317
      @navaneethakrishnan4317 5 років тому

      Hello my friend
      Yes ,contact Dr NaNa on WhatsApp now he can help you bring back your ex & restore your relationship back 🔊🔊🔊🔊💯
      Whatsap No: + 2 3 4 8 1 3 2 4 9 4 8 0 2.

    • @shirleywimmerth2882
      @shirleywimmerth2882 4 роки тому +1

      Is this Dr Nana a wichtdoctor or herbalist or born again believer?

    • @kennethreed3677
      @kennethreed3677 2 роки тому

      I pray that your marriage make it through the hard times.

  • @devaloshinigovender4133
    @devaloshinigovender4133 3 роки тому +3

    Thank you Sir Jimmy Evans, your guidance has been a soothing balm in my troubled mind ... no one to turn to and i found this video... my mother endlessly trying to break my marriage because she hates my husband... she disrespects and disregards my marriage and creates so much conflict between my husband & i because i approach him believing the bad things my mum says.... but this video has really been a light in the dark for me... thank you and Thank You God for guiding me here...

    • @garethsimpson7953
      @garethsimpson7953 3 роки тому

      👆🏻 🔺 name above got me full access to my partner's cellphone he is legit

  • @Kinester100
    @Kinester100 3 роки тому +10

    There are times when you want to leave so much but you just do not have anywhere to go

    • @brendatrevino7083
      @brendatrevino7083 3 роки тому +3

      Same here 15 years in and 5 kids 😭

    • @beckydoucet7279
      @beckydoucet7279 3 роки тому +1

      @@brendatrevino7083 35 years...I wish I would have left many years ago but never had the guts to. Still hurting and no place to go 😩

    • @trishsmithwick6846
      @trishsmithwick6846 6 місяців тому

      I understand living like this

  • @user12383
    @user12383 Рік тому +2

    That’s great he clarifies that about abuse. First time I’ve heard it where it makes sense 🙌🏼

  • @humblednature9593
    @humblednature9593 3 роки тому +3

    His wife's name is always on his mouth. truly out of the love for her stored up in his heart. Single and loving these teachings. It's never too early to start learning these truths

    • @bko5489
      @bko5489 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/7O2yN9iGutw/v-deo.html

  • @linad9811
    @linad9811 3 роки тому +15

    My Husband of 21 yrs left me for someone else
    Returned home when tht didn't work out stayed for 6mnths left again moved back in wit the person
    I've prayed prayed & prayed
    I'm broken from all of this but I'm not giving up on Me I've stopped praying for restoration of my marriage my Husband's heart & love only me I pray for Me now

    • @michelleyb.9709
      @michelleyb.9709 Рік тому

      My boyfriend of 8 years recently became religious and asked me to marry him. Then treats me so callously that at times I don't even recognise him. I don't know if I should go through with the marriage, I might not get another chance at my age, but it seems all downhill from here as it is

    • @user12383
      @user12383 Рік тому

      He needs to go to therapy with you. If he’s not willing too then he seems to not be serious about you unfortunately. Move on with your life xx

    • @neurenmoore5461
      @neurenmoore5461 4 місяці тому

      Amen

  • @Jessica-oi6sw
    @Jessica-oi6sw 4 роки тому +9

    I began watching Jimmy a few months ago, and I am always coming back to this teaching though. It must resonate with me. I just want to thank Jimmy & Karen for making this available for people and for marriage because with all the temptations we truly need it now more than ever. Jimmy, thank you so much for helping me see the light and bringing faith into my life. ❤😇👍

  • @jadec3453
    @jadec3453 3 роки тому +2

    Wow! The question and answer time at the end when they shared- hits home. Especially when she said she felt God liked her husband better than her because He allowed her husband to continue to ill treat her

  • @soniavinaik1967
    @soniavinaik1967 3 роки тому +6

    Thank you Jimmy for your message. I know for sure this is my solution to my marriage issue. Redeemptive love which needs to be passed on to our spouse. God bless your marriage even more. As you have sown may you reap more good i
    All Glory to Jesus. Praise the Lord

  • @jonhudson6981
    @jonhudson6981 2 роки тому +5

    My wife does the same thing as the woman's husband who was sleeping with the girlfriend every in the story. She comes home to take the kids to school and then brings the kids home and leaves as soon as I get home from work. Last night she asked me to replace the breaks on her car, I said no because she is not treating me like her husband, but she still wants me to perform husband tasks for her like doing a break job. I realized that was a mistake and that's not how Jesus loves, and I called her to say I would do the breaks. She said some hurtful things, blamed all the problems in our marriage on me and said she doesn't need my help. It's very hurtful and hard to know how to show Christ's love to someone who just wants to take advantage of you.

  • @fruityfitnatic7238
    @fruityfitnatic7238 5 років тому +11

    Hope this helps typical couples. Nothing on or outside this earth could jave helpes my husband and I. When you have an angry, very selfish and self destructive, you could be an angel, tending to all of their wishes and it will never, ever be enough for them. They hate themselvea and never could truly love another person. Like myself, they spend years and sometimes a lifetime trying to help them. What we need to do is help our self, love our self and put our well being first. Only then can we attract a more positive partner.

    • @miriammatthews2202
      @miriammatthews2202 5 років тому +3

      Sounds like you married a narcissist. They are dangerous. And life destroying. Pray for them. Give them to God totally

  • @moalferez8749
    @moalferez8749 3 роки тому +5

    THANK YOU GOD!!!!!! For this video!! Been struggling to the point where confusion came in - not Godly. THANK YOU for praying the price to feed us!!

  • @ginagonzalez1530
    @ginagonzalez1530 5 років тому +3

    Wow, that was powerful, I was married 2xs both failed because first I did not have God in my heart, second I did have the Lord in my heart, but was too hurt from previous hurts and whatever my second husband did hurt me even more. Both cheated on me because I did not take care of myself. That was 40 yrs ago altogether. I wish things would've been different for me then. It's powerful I think I still need healing before I'm ready for anyone else. God Bless you, family, ministries. Thank you.

  • @kassandrav504
    @kassandrav504 3 роки тому +4

    OH MY GOSH! THIS WAS SOOOOOO CONVICTING! Jesus help me, here we go.

  • @VanessaSimon26
    @VanessaSimon26 5 років тому +50

    Please pray for me and my husband Elkin. He has hurt me. He has kept sex from me for years. He has just started testosterone therapy. But for years he didn’t listen to me. How do I move past this! Please help me. The devil is putting bad thoughts in my head. Please help me. Lord come into heart.

    • @shastavelasquez2212
      @shastavelasquez2212 5 років тому +9

      Jesus restore this marriage

    • @AngelinaMinecrafter
      @AngelinaMinecrafter 5 років тому +2

      Hi Focus on Jesus...he is bigger than ur problem. Take a decision to trust HIM .

    • @janefarrer2868
      @janefarrer2868 5 років тому

      Dear Vanessa, please visit my UA-cam channel ,, Jane farrer,,, ,hope the videos there will be encouraging and helpful ♥️💓

    • @princeali1786
      @princeali1786 4 роки тому +5

      Dump the creep and move on. Trust me, it won’t get better. Sex is a very big part of a relationship and if he is withholding it from you it seems he is trying to push you out to go and find it elsewhere. People just don’t really realize what they have until it is gone. Then they beg scream kick to get it back with false promises of changing and making things better. Then two week passes and he/she is tight back to square one. As hard as it is to give up or run away, especially if you have children together, if NOT run and in time you will find someone who would worship you as a Princess and all the past crap will only be a bad nightmare. Sorry, but what a jerk he is.

    • @princeali1786
      @princeali1786 4 роки тому

      hi there - First, walk a mile in my shoes and see things from my eyes. Then you will see why I gave the advice I did. Second, I am a firm believer in the one supreme GOD. Although I am NOT a Christian but I do Respect the religion and praise a Jesus( peace be upon him) as a great messiah or messenger of God but not God or the son of God as Christians believe. I had a very bad situation (marriage of 27 faithful years) with 3 children involved and I am still going through crap with the divorce today. She turned to the devils tricks of Drugs, alcohol and and an unfaithful marriage which all occurred in a matter of 9 months. She ruined my children and has tried to ruin me with the law with my job with my every day life. I do believe that Hod exposed her and it will be better for me in the latter years. But, it ain’t easy because I am human and I’m in a world where it is corrupted with every kind of vice and temptations and being a weak human I DONT blame God I blame her and her association with lack of faith to be tempted to these things I have mentioned. From a professional with high morals and respect to a whore and a druggy who choose this shit over me and our children. God is great and I accept it . Peace

  • @katiebr
    @katiebr 4 роки тому +6

    this guy is my man!! tough to hear, hard to do, but so very true!!! its changing my view..

  • @nomessspotlesshousekeepingllc
    @nomessspotlesshousekeepingllc 3 роки тому +2

    I'm black native American. And I love Jimmy and Karen Evens, and there videos. Thank you.

  • @DebbyGautreaux
    @DebbyGautreaux 3 роки тому +2

    I agree.. it happens every single time when we lay down our own ways or the world way and do it God’s Way,

  • @beautifulqueen748
    @beautifulqueen748 5 років тому +21

    Thank you 🙏🏾 I’m not yet married but this will help

  • @lornalopido946
    @lornalopido946 3 роки тому +1

    Halleluiah!! Praise the Lord!!thank you Mr.Jimmy Evans,to God be the glory!!!🥰🥰🥰

    • @bko5489
      @bko5489 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/7O2yN9iGutw/v-deo.html
      Hope you like this song Lorna!

  • @waterbaby6786
    @waterbaby6786 4 роки тому +11

    I wished i could have applied the Word of God every argument. Feel so much quilt for not being Christ like. What a poor testimony on my part. I want more of Him and to be forever changed!!

  • @rassiamelo6076
    @rassiamelo6076 5 років тому +3

    I am so blessed to have people that give me redemptive love in my life. An essential part of marriage. Thank you :)

  • @jessicak5246
    @jessicak5246 5 років тому +17

    I love how they say abuse but unless ur in it u don't know how it feels

  • @tretre4u72
    @tretre4u72 6 років тому +17

    That's a tough thing to do for real!!

  • @mrh2os420
    @mrh2os420 3 роки тому +4

    My marriage is possibly over. I am striving to keep the faith. Your messages have kept the hope alive. Staying true to the commitment and deep love for her has been difficult given she is not on the same school of thought in trying to implement your teachings. However, when do you move on and have God's blessing to do so? Again, your teachings have enable me to manage a very dark place. Keep up the good work!

    • @isahabdullahi5310
      @isahabdullahi5310 3 роки тому

      Am so happy because of DR Rorpopor spell on UA-cam before I met with DR Rorpopor spell on UA-cam I was sick for 2years before I met DR Rorpopor spell on UA-cam but now am healed thank you DR Rorpopor spell on UA-cam🥰

  • @nicolekelly7782
    @nicolekelly7782 5 років тому +3

    I'm not religious but now i understand why people who are religious have such a deep faith.
    Thank you for helping me figure out my frustration and how to handle it.
    i feel a similar warmth at times for children or animals, and I should have that kind of love for my partner. To understand he is human and hurts like me but i should unconditionally love him and accept him for his flaws, and i am sure if i do this he will learn from me and love me this way to.

    • @navaneethakrishnan4317
      @navaneethakrishnan4317 5 років тому

      #NicolleKelly.
      Hello my friend
      Do not worry much about this,contact Dr NaNa on WhatsApp now he can help you bring back your ex & restore your relationship back 🔊🔊🔊🔊💯
      Whatsap No: + 2 3 4 8 1 3 2 4 9 4 8 0 2.
      ☝☝☝☝☝☝☝📩

  • @lusineavagyan5856
    @lusineavagyan5856 6 років тому +39

    But this is all about what ladies can do, what about him? When he will think to change himself and care for wife? Why only wife needs to make things happen for him? What about him?

    • @hansenandtanya
      @hansenandtanya 6 років тому +16

      It's easy to think, "what about him?" The Bible tells us to cast ALL our cares and worries onto Him. Only God can heal and mend what is broken once you release it and forgive him. Let God do the work. In the meantime, connect into God's word, watch these helpful videos, surrender your husband (sometimes daily surrender), and believe that God will prop his heart in areas that needs to be changed. God will put people, events in his path to speak to him about change. It will come. Trust in Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding.

    • @verifieduser3301
      @verifieduser3301 5 років тому +2

      For real...

    • @alexanderrodriguez8420
      @alexanderrodriguez8420 4 роки тому

      Lusine Avagyan shoot i can’t even find one girl to fight that hard for me these guys be having two 🤣lol

    • @georgiayoung9124
      @georgiayoung9124 3 роки тому +2

      I'm also wondering if this relates to physical abuse...he wants to see you dead. No sorry I got out...

    • @darlenefray8654
      @darlenefray8654 3 роки тому +1

      @@georgiayoung9124 It definitely doesn't apply to abuse, and Jimmy Evans does state that in his presentation. I'm glad for you that you got out as well.

  • @lindaalicea7539
    @lindaalicea7539 6 років тому +53

    Am trying to forgive him, but I can't forget the things he said. He refuse to get counseling and am mentally tired and physically drain.

    • @keketennessee9116
      @keketennessee9116 6 років тому +2

      linda alicea I totally understand. I will turn gospel music on and it made him stop what he was doing. He did and is slowly changing.

    • @niks8521
      @niks8521 6 років тому +6

      Just keep doing what is right by him. I'm telling u to please trust that the Lord honors our efforts. If u make the first step, He will make the next! Just don't give up!! The key is to make SURE that YOU are doing YOUR part & the rest will follow

    • @raneetablog
      @raneetablog 6 років тому +3

      linda alicea dont give up hope. Love and prayers

    • @debracolter4693
      @debracolter4693 6 років тому +1

      Forgive,maybe if your life is not in danger then give it one more try. I believe that God give us authoritie to walk away.

    • @pam6610
      @pam6610 6 років тому +2

      Ask God to help you forgive and forget. It might take some time, but nothing is impossible for Him. Also I would not recommend you counseling; most of the tines it only causes more destruction. Please consider visiting www.hopeatlast.com and using their godly resources and taking their free courses to renew your mind. You won't regret it. Bless you.

  • @Latia_Dimples
    @Latia_Dimples 2 роки тому +5

    Great word. I saw my own flaws in this video and I'm interested in learning more skills to improve myself and my marriage.

  • @idahallenbeck6826
    @idahallenbeck6826 7 років тому +7

    For over the past 4 years , our marriage has been disrespected, mocked, harassed and even had a woman spread lies and saying she was having sex with My Husband, posting filth about us on social media, to say the least. By standing on The Truth , taking authority that we have been given by Jesus Himself and through You and your wife's teaching, the tables have been completely turned!!!!!!!
    Jesus has fought for our family and is restoring Everything the enemy has stolen and had made our marriage and family whole ⚔️💕⚔️

    • @idahallenbeck6826
      @idahallenbeck6826 7 років тому

      People interfering with our marriage even posted that my husband was going to divorce me..... The Word is alive and does Not return void !!!!! My husband is a true Man of God , has been redeemed and filled with The Holy Spirit and stands against the enemy, leading me and our 5 sons by his example. Only by faith and truth and Not bowing down to our enemy surrendering to defeat, and by many prayers going up to the throne of God, only Jesus , gets all the glory ⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️⚔️
      We love Him so much!!!
      Please keep praying for our marriage and family, we know God has great plans and brought us together for His Glory!!!

  • @amithasimon6725
    @amithasimon6725 5 років тому +4

    Ur the best preacher ive heard v v deep truths and explained with your own experiences may Lord bless u immensely!

  • @VReyesMusic
    @VReyesMusic Рік тому

    “The best person does the right thing first” 🎯🎯🎯🎯

  • @nataliasolakian6717
    @nataliasolakian6717 4 роки тому +5

    My heart is SO hurt I don't know why he behaves the way that He does. I have been praying and I feel I am.watering a bucket with holes in it.

    • @bko5489
      @bko5489 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/7O2yN9iGutw/v-deo.html

  • @ksmithwillis
    @ksmithwillis 7 років тому +18

    Amazing words of truth from God's word. Perfect advice. Thank you ✝❤

  • @lawrenced1508
    @lawrenced1508 6 років тому +25

    This was such a great video and I see what I have to do. Lord thank you for amazing words

  • @mrs.padilla9328
    @mrs.padilla9328 4 роки тому +5

    My husband and I have been married for almost 39 years. Found out about two weeks ago he has been looking at inapproriate vedios on youtube of women. I was so hurt cause this has never been an issue in our marrige . Our sex life is wonderful we have always had sex almost everyday. Confronted him about it was sorry and ashamed he said . I let him know I forgive him and now he needs to be accoutable to God. Said only been watching for about a month and would stop. So its been really hard everytime
    I see him online or on his phone to wonder whats he looking at. I saw him delete something on his computer today and out of nowhere I snapped at him what did you just delete. He said wasnt deleteing nothing was clicking on something. And snapped back said I am tried of being accused. Which was 2nd time I have since I found out. I told him he is the one who broke
    the trust in our marriage and its gonna take time for me to trust him . I know I have to just give it to God and let it go but its hard.
    My behavior hasnt changed towards him if anything better . Just need prayer to be able to trust him .

  • @mdt6482
    @mdt6482 2 роки тому +2

    Amen!!! We have to give what God has giving us. What good it's to give good to someone who give you good. ❤️ God is love and love overcome all things. He gave his life for me because of Love ❤️.

  • @janicewyatt8516
    @janicewyatt8516 4 роки тому +8

    Thank you for clarifying your stance on abuse and the difference from suffering. Makes a huge difference for me. I have been receiving a tremendous amount wisdom and encouragement from listening to hours and hours of your teaching. Just now, before you made those statements clarifying that difference, I felt alienated and began to bottom out.

  • @johnjohnson1681
    @johnjohnson1681 3 роки тому +5

    that was truly beautiful jimmy a lot of people under estimate these little simple things... i wish i knew these things at the start of my marriage 10 years ago 100% i wouldnt be looking at a spouse who no longer loves me... because if your trying to implement these skills when shes said that its too late trust me :/

  • @kimacker5615
    @kimacker5615 3 роки тому

    Jimmy and Karen have helped me so much in my marriage, now all I have to do is build up the courage to get my husband to listen to them with me!

  • @tammenjnobaptiste
    @tammenjnobaptiste 5 років тому +7

    I have work to do, oh help me Lord to forgive and to love like you love me amen 🙏🏾😔

  • @gerardgmz
    @gerardgmz 5 років тому +17

    Jesus gave us great hope:
    "When the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven."

  • @TheQueenPsChannel
    @TheQueenPsChannel 5 років тому +21

    This message was a blessing to me!

  • @christinaphillipspurvis1364
    @christinaphillipspurvis1364 6 років тому +7

    I needed to hear this so bad. I am constantly belittled by my spouse and there is no affection in our marriage. I am ready to separate from this toxic relationship but my faith that this situation will change is keeping me chained in this unhappy marriage.

    • @NurseMiMiJ
      @NurseMiMiJ 6 років тому +3

      I'm on the same boat...praying daily. Stay strong.❤

  • @siphokazin.7552
    @siphokazin.7552 4 роки тому +2

    The work you do is amazing, when you help marriages you help families, children and future generation. Although my relationship needs way more work I'm blessed by this message as a woman.
    Thank you!

  • @maidenkeebine6276
    @maidenkeebine6276 4 роки тому +2

    Thank you so much pastor for the teachings. I believe in marriage and pray that marriages be blessed.

  • @nanabah49
    @nanabah49 4 роки тому +2

    Thank you this has been the words that I've desperately needed to hear. For the first time in almost 3 years I feel hope.

  • @shivaniaggarwal8287
    @shivaniaggarwal8287 5 років тому +4

    I needed this today very badly. I am very happy that I got to listen to this video. Love this man and his teachings..

  • @paradisearyaei7058
    @paradisearyaei7058 5 років тому +4

    Thank u so much Jimmy Evans for doing a great job that make who has relationship problems to feel better when they listen your words. God bless you and please keep doing this fabulous mission.

  • @HUGSsandi
    @HUGSsandi 4 роки тому +2

    Thank you for this. It took me from being angry that it seems women are always the one that have to do the work to actually wanting to be the first to do the work again. That's kinda HUGE for me right now!

    • @donnacollings472
      @donnacollings472 4 роки тому

      All thanks to Dr Aguiyi for helping me get back the love of my life🥰🥰🥰
      Are you in need of Spiritual help? Do you want your Ex back? Do you need business breakthrough? Do you need marriage spell? Do you need Good luck spell? Kindly email Dr Aguiyi via email (aguiyispellcaster@gmail.com)Or what app him (+2348151642717) And get any kind of spell you want. Doctor Aguiyi helped me get the love of my life and we are happily married for now and that is why i am posting this review for people who are also in need of love spell and other kinds of problem.

  • @God4all777
    @God4all777 3 роки тому +2

    You are HUGE blessing to many lost couples! May God lead you to their hearts and minds to bring Godly change! Only patience and love ruining rocks. It is SO difficult! Only Jesus can do it for us when HE lives in us....

  • @naowright9308
    @naowright9308 4 роки тому +2

    Much of this God taught me several years ago and sadly some of it I forgot. Thank you for this reminder.

  • @j.sheila7025
    @j.sheila7025 5 років тому +6

    THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH!!!! GOD BLESS YOU❤ I NEED THIS MESSAGE. THANKS, AGAIN...AND I THANK GOD FOR YOU

  • @newdlinestestimonials5384
    @newdlinestestimonials5384 3 роки тому

    Being married and being a wife is all new to me. I love my husband and he also loves me. We're a church going, Christan couple. I love Pastor Jimmy Evans and only wish we had found these lovely videos before we tied the knot. Better late than never lol

    • @garethsimpson7953
      @garethsimpson7953 3 роки тому

      👆🏻 👆🏻 name above got me full access to my partner's cellphone

    • @ricardokanimin812
      @ricardokanimin812 Рік тому

      So do we also , go to Church and married for 18 years and she cheated on me ,went away for 1 month and asked to came back and still is cheating on me, and now I am planning to divorce her.

  • @unidentified113
    @unidentified113 5 років тому +18

    Thank you for this. My husband wants a divorce. He wants to be free and said he’s exhausted. I blamed myself first because I was the one who pushed him away first for not meeting the standards I want in a marriage but actually that’s what the devil wants. It’s all the devil. My husband is a non Christian. It makes it harder because he has no faith. I wasn’t living like a Godly wife because I didn’t know how to. Therefore, I’m facing this trial. Please pray for me as well. I trust the Lord is working on us and the best is yet to come.

    • @Thankful305
      @Thankful305 2 роки тому

      @Un Identified …. Did you get divorced or has everything worked out?

    • @unidentified113
      @unidentified113 2 роки тому +2

      @@Thankful305 Hi, everything has worked out in a way.. I think maybe God is still in the works. My husband wants the marriage again but I am dealing with grief of what has been taken from the marriage.. I am dealing with trust issues now and betrayal trauma. I also am dealing with a lot of anger and hurt. It's been a battle full of scars. Just trying to hold on to the thread of Jesus. I'm actually really exhausted. Some days I get really discouraged. But I am gonna just...keep trying and wait for God. It's so sad.

    • @Thankful305
      @Thankful305 2 роки тому +1

      @@unidentified113 Sounds familiar 😔
      I am so sorry!
      What marriage is supposed to be and it isn’t “that way” does hurt-- a lot!
      But our faith in God sustains us , it’s the only sure thing we have .
      🙏🤗🙏

    • @unidentified113
      @unidentified113 2 роки тому +1

      @@Thankful305 Thank you. Yes it is. It's also just so hard to move on forward everyday.

    • @MajWrldd
      @MajWrldd 2 роки тому +2

      the fact that im going through the same thing 😞 my husband has filed for divorce and signed every form 🥺 all he’s waiting for is to serve me . i still want to fight for my marriage with God on my side . i do believe he’s separating us to do some self healing . i just pray it works out for us all , for my situation has left me severely suicidal … but i know thats what the devil wants . as i pray for you i ask that you pray for me 💛 we are Gods children 💖

  • @teronm
    @teronm 6 років тому +8

    I am gaining soo much knowledge. I am unsure of if my marriage can be repaired and we can move forward but I am definitely learning, gaining knowledge and preparing myself! Thank you.

  • @stephanielumu3330
    @stephanielumu3330 5 років тому +9

    Your messages has changed my life thank you sir 😭😭😭😭😭😭

  • @decORAtingforalloccasions
    @decORAtingforalloccasions 6 років тому +6

    As usual an Awesome Word!!! Going from Good to Great!!! Thank you both for your faithfulness!!!

  • @HD77781
    @HD77781 3 роки тому +2

    The story of redeeming the husband to Jesus gets me. My husband who was saved, I thought I married a Christian, he was on leadership at our church and yet has been very abusive and separating. He would through our 18 year marriage use that scripture that I am somehow to redeem him to Jesus.

  • @tonniareed8631
    @tonniareed8631 Рік тому +1

    Sadly I have tried this for years. I do get discouraged and disappointed. Yet I stay. I pray God can change me and my resentful heart.

  • @robgpa1
    @robgpa1 3 роки тому +4

    Wow this was worth the listen. It hits home and I love my wife and I want a great marriage. I'm going to share this and hope it helps others

    • @bko5489
      @bko5489 3 роки тому

      ua-cam.com/video/7O2yN9iGutw/v-deo.html

  • @cjotz6599
    @cjotz6599 4 роки тому +1

    I tried all this 28 years ago and thought it had worked. Learned to trust him again now I just find out that he recently has been texting with a lady from church. She told me what was happening and he didn’t deny it and shows no remorse whatsoever. I’m done

  • @Stiktriks
    @Stiktriks 5 років тому +11

    This Powerful stuff ! Level 10 Difficulty lol

  • @JT-mq1jk
    @JT-mq1jk 2 роки тому +1

    I have been so terrible to my wife over the past 8 years due to addiction and anger problems and now that I'm trying to get right for once in my life she doesn't seem to want me anymore. Idk why I'm writing this but I have no family to talk to and I try to tell my wife im struggling with depression and trying so hard to fight my inner demons with addiction but she just doesn't seem to see me for what I'm actually doing and not doing anymore. All I want is for my wife to love me again and see that I'm fighting for us and I'm actually standing up on my own two feet planted on the ground and I will continue to fight no matter what.

    • @jay97xx
      @jay97xx Рік тому

      Was that a success? I hope it was. Its nice seeing men’s perspective on these things

  • @lemons6407
    @lemons6407 6 років тому +8

    Can you please talk about how to communicate with my husband
    I have a daughter from a previous relationship and he has 2 daughters
    He tends to be too strict with mine and not with his
    Can you please make a video about these kinds of topics.

  • @naturesurfaces2755
    @naturesurfaces2755 5 років тому +2

    This is so hard to swallow but absolutely is truth and is true agape love!

    • @navaneethakrishnan4317
      @navaneethakrishnan4317 5 років тому

      #naturesurfaces
      If you want your ex back and your relationship back,contact Dr Nana now via WhatsApp. + 2 3 4 8 1 3 2 4 9 4 8 0 2.. He can help you restore your relationship

  • @nicolewarren2284
    @nicolewarren2284 2 роки тому

    I Thank God and I thank you for allowing God to use your vessel to teach ✨

  • @steveg3767
    @steveg3767 3 роки тому +2

    I could sure use some honest advice and feedback. Long story short, I have been married to someone who has narcissistic traits. About 2 months ago we attended our 19th marriage counseling session together. At that session I told my wife that somehow our marriage needs to drastically get better quickly, or I feel we need pull the plug and end our marriage since we have been going to marriage counseling for far longer than we probably should have been going; and not much, if anything, has improved. Part of me was hopeful that this was going to be the warning shot and my wife would finally hear me; that she would finally understand that I am done with the narcissistic type of behavior, done with the mean comments, the high level of control, and being made out to feel like I am never doing the right thing, never doing it quickly enough, etc. Unfortunately, the few weeks after that counselling sessions things did not improve, they actually seemed worse. For example, one morning I started her car so it was warm for her when she left for work (which I do for her quite often). I wasn’t looking for a pat on the back, but she very rudely said “oh, thank you so much for everything you do”. One day I went and bought a shovel and salt and cleaned the ice from the sidewalk. Instead of getting any type of thanks or appreciation, she told me that it is so interesting that I had time to go to Dollar General (which is about 3 miles from our house) and buy a new shovel and salt. I got criticized for doing laundry and putting in on ‘her side’ of the bed and not having it moved off of the bed so she could lay down at night without having to touch laundry. I got criticized for having the space heater on in the living room. I got criticized for eating all the lasagna; when in fact I put it in a Tupperware container so she could take it in her lunch. I got questioned on going for a walk along the river. It was just relentless verbal attacks. By no means am I a perfect husband, I am far from it, and I have made plenty of mistakes, but I have always tried to be loving and supportive and take care of her and our kids. I have dealt with this type of narcissistic behavior for a very long time. Just another example, I recently learned why I was in severe pain for a couple of days this past summer; I was passing a 6mm kidney stone. While I was in pain, I got in a hot bath to try and alleviate some of the pain. I recall vividly her making a mean comment that I was in the bath while she was doing something for the kids. I have agonized over the decision for many months, and probably years now, but about 5 weeks ago I asked for divorce and have been moved out since that time. She said it wasn’t fair and that I blindsided her, even though we have attended those 19 marriage counseling sessions together; I reluctantly agreed to separation for now. For the last five weeks, I have been buried in loving texts, pictures of our kids and of some fun memories in the past, she sent me the wedding song that we danced too, she has been sending me quotes from the bible, she asked that I listen to various books on making marriages work, etc; she asked that I meet with our Deacon at church and attend a church marriage weekend retreat. She has buried me in a variety of ‘tactics’ to try and get me back home; she has thrown our vows in my face multiple times and said that I am destroying the kids by moving out. I have been holding strong and have not caved by moving back in; recently she has been all over the board with her comments and emotions. Seems silly talking about, but we own a car and a truck. For the last 5 weeks I have drove the truck and she has had the car. A couple of days ago she said she wants the truck, which is no problem, but I asked her why; she said she doesn’t need to answer why, she just wants it. She said she plans on keeping the truck for a few weeks since its not fair that I got to drive it for a few weeks (I don’t know the intentions of this, other than some form of power play, or maybe knowing if she has the truck, I won’t be able to use it to do things I enjoy). She also seems to be getting controlling with the kids; she told me that I am the one who decided to leave them, so its not fair for me to ever get both of our kids overnight while she is alone, since she didn’t decide to leave. I reminded her that I didn’t leave the kids, that I only left her. Shortly after making these types of comments, she follows up with a load of very nice loving texts. This is all extremely hard for me, because she occasionally acts nice and says she is willing to try and change, but seems all over the place with her comments and emotions; I’m afraid I will fall back into the trap. I worry greatly about our kids, I feel she is subjecting them to a ton of sadness and possibly emotional manipulation, with the intentions being of playing the victim card in front of the kids and trying to make them feel bad for her and make me out to look like the bad guy (she told me she is always crying in front of the kids…and even yesterday when I saw her she cried multiple times in front of the kids). Even though I asked for divorce, I still do not wish her unhappiness; I just want everyone to get along and be nice and supportive with everyone. To make matters even more frustrating, yesterday she told me she was offered a job in Michigan (about 5 hours from where we currently live in Ohio). I am settled here in Ohio now, have a good job here, etc. I am happy for her that she was offered the job, I know that is more what she wants to do versus her current job, so that part makes me happy; but come on, wanting to relocate now while we are separated. I feel like she is doing everything she can to try and make things difficult for me, especially with our 2 kids. Random place to insert this comment….but I just thought it was odd; she claims to want the marriage to work, but considering uprooting to Michigan. I manage all of our finances, yesterday she said she wants all of our bank account log in information. Which is fine, no problem, it is both of our money; I just thought it was a little odd. Not sure the intentions behind it. Maybe just wanting to see how much is there, if I have been taking any, what I have spent money on; who knows?! Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated.

    • @kitana3977
      @kitana3977 3 роки тому

      Look up RC Blakes for more clarification on your problem. He has lots of resources. Bless you

    • @steveg3767
      @steveg3767 3 роки тому

      Is it possible for someone who has narcissistic traits to give you the time and space that you have requested? If they don’t give you the time and space as requested, is that a good sign they are narcissistic and will never request your wishes, or really don’t care what you want? I included much more details in my original post, but just to summarize, for almost 18 years, I have been married to someone who has narcissistic traits. Our marriage has been struggling for a few years now; about 2 months ago we attended our 19th marriage counseling session together. I have agonized over the decision for many months, and probably years now, but about 5 weeks ago I asked for divorce and have been moved out since that time. She said it wasn’t fair and that I blindsided her, even though we have attended those 19 marriage counseling sessions together; I reluctantly agreed to separation for now. During the last 5 weeks our two boys have mostly stayed with her, but I have seen them everyday and communicate with them frequently; I continue to coach their baseball team, take them out to eat, play together, walk the dogs together, etc. Due to having kids together, I have seen my wife and have communicated with her almost daily. I have tried to be as nice as possible and I have tried to make things as easiest and as less painful on everyone as possible; I have told her that, at a minimum, I need time and space away from her so I can clear my head and think about the path forward, whether that means filing for divorce or giving the marriage another try. Unfortunately she has not given me much space whatsoever; she has asked me to meet with our Deacon at church, we have also met with the priest, and she asked that I attend a 4 day marriage retreat weekend through church (which I attended). I didn’t know this at the time, but this marriage retreat weekend also includes nightly ‘homework’ assignments for 6 weeks afterwards, as well as Saturday meetings for the next 6 weeks from 9am-1pm. It has been exhausting. Just to give a recent example of the limited space I have received over the last few days; this Saturday was our son’s 12th birthday. On Friday night she asked me to go to dinner with everyone, which I agreed to mostly for our kids. On Saturday I was back home at 8am to have breakfast with the family since it was my son’s birthday. She reminded me shortly after breakfast that the marriage session starts at 9am. I was trying to be accommodating so I agreed to attend for a couple of hours; which turned into me attending the entire time (I was fuming). My son and I even missed his baseball practice due to this. Towards the end of the marriage session I was extremely frustrated with her; I told her that I have asked nicely for time and space and that I don’t want to feel obligated or guilted into doing things anymore, such as attending the marriage sessions. She of course started crying, which prompted my son to come into the room and ask what is wrong and why are we fighting, which broke my heart since it was his birthday. Later on Saturday we all went to play pickball together, and went out to eat for his birthday dinner. Sunday morning I wanted to be nice and show the kids we can still be supportive and function as a family, so I met them for church. Later yesterday evening she sent me the daily homework assignment, which was answering the question “How do I feel about the importance of making decisions as a couple”? Her response to the question was: She feels defeated, inadequate, unimportant, worthless, furious, alienated, and heartbroken about the importance of making decisions as a couple”. Later yesterday evening she also wrote me a ‘Thank you’ email and said: “Thank you for the time you spent at the marriage session. Thank you for fixing the sink while I was there. Thank you for being a great dad to the boys. And thank you for continuing to be there for them.” Even though the email was nice, I get so frustrated because just earlier that day I told her I need time and space, but yet she buries me with the marriage session homework, then the thank you email. I know she is hurting; am I being too heartless? I’m trying so hard to go about this properly. We continue to have a shared email that we both can use, this morning I noticed that yesterday she emailed the priest from our church and asked him for a letter of recommendation for a job in northern Ohio, about 3.5 hours from where we currently live. She never once communicated this with me. It is just all so exhausting. One, I don’t feel she is giving me any space; two, she is all over the board with her actions and behavior; and three, what are her intentions with applying for a job so far away. Sorry for the long post….just struggling on the path forward.

    • @cassielindsey4970
      @cassielindsey4970 3 роки тому

      @@steveg3767 I can Recommend you to a man who bring my husband back within two days.

    • @cassielindsey4970
      @cassielindsey4970 3 роки тому

      @@steveg3767 his name is Coach Dan. Contact him on whatsapp.

    • @cassielindsey4970
      @cassielindsey4970 3 роки тому

      @@steveg3767
      + 2 3 4 8 1 1 8 6 5 4 5 2 5

  • @gayarnold9994
    @gayarnold9994 4 роки тому +1

    God is so good thank you for these teachings Your such a blessing to ody of Christ

  • @EuniceAimano-jq5vj
    @EuniceAimano-jq5vj 6 місяців тому

    I thankyou for this bible teaching,im true blessed right now after listening to this teaching....im going through a difficult time with my husband wanting to have a second wife.....please send me some more of bible teachings about marriage