How To Respond When Your Spouse Hurts You | Jimmy Evans

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  • Опубліковано 22 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 74

  • @carolibouwer7170
    @carolibouwer7170 2 роки тому +152

    Pstr Jimmy, I’ve just about given up on a marriage of 38 years. Until I listened to :Treating your Spouse like Jesus. By the grace of God and with the help of the Holy Spirit I will apply these principles. I have hope that the best is yet to come. Thank you for being faithful in sharing the Truth!

    • @XOMarriage
      @XOMarriage  2 роки тому +7

      Thank you so much for tuning in! We appreciate your kind words so much!

    • @jordynferrari4161
      @jordynferrari4161 2 роки тому +11

      I highly recommend the book “Created to Be His Help Meet” by Debbie Pearl if you are a wife. It’ll transform your marriage!

    • @saradanser894
      @saradanser894 2 роки тому +3

      I'd encourage you to listen to Dan Mohler's marriage testimony. It's INTENSE

    • @ShelovesJesusandElvis
      @ShelovesJesusandElvis 2 роки тому +4

      Caroli!! You’re not alone!! Let us know how it goes!!!😂😊No I’m gonna ask Holy Spirit to do this in and thru me too!! Today is 12/27/22 This year is going to ROCK

    • @wesv8743
      @wesv8743 Рік тому +7

      I feel your pain more than you know. 20 years in and I don't know what to do besides depend on the Lord and pray. Doesn't matter how much I serve putting effort into me isn't even in her top 10 anymore. I tell her I'm hurt and she mocks me like a bully would. Praying for both our marriages

  • @josuenieves9420
    @josuenieves9420 Рік тому +27

    I love my Wife more than she knows! I am trying and will continue to Try HARDER! Cost me what it may cost me. Thank you Jesus for this word & teaching 🙏

    • @rebekah1836
      @rebekah1836 Рік тому +4

      Love her like Jesus loves the church, else it won't matter. This is coming from an unloved wife of 19yrs of marriage

  • @jnick0650
    @jnick0650 2 роки тому +30

    I am going to be a redeemer for my marriage! Thank you Pastor! 🙌

  • @kiplingtturner
    @kiplingtturner 2 роки тому +18

    Thank you. My wife and I have had so many blessings in our lives lately and we're glad you are apart of it Jimmy yes sir. God bless you two.

  • @savannahjames-ke9sx
    @savannahjames-ke9sx Рік тому +9

    It’s hard when you don’t even have a relationship with your partner. This is one of the most frustrating things I have ever had to endure. I’m so dik now that I’ve checked out

  • @incognitoriaanonymousita
    @incognitoriaanonymousita Рік тому +11

    So what do you do when you address it and they act like they've done nothing wrong?

  • @cartelrider9375
    @cartelrider9375 11 місяців тому +2

    My wife of 24years just asked me to leave. She wanted to separate. I asked her is she would go to your marriage seminar she said no. I asked her if she would read marriage on the Rock with me and she said no. All I am doing now is praying for her heart to soften. I have sent her a video of you preaching about marriage and her response was I already know all that. I pray she will watch a video and feel the Holy Spirit moving in her.

  • @lovingkingjesus4822
    @lovingkingjesus4822 10 місяців тому +7

    "When you're already wounded just the smallest thing can hurt really deeply." Jesus help open our eyes. In Jesus name amen.

  • @gb-yn2re
    @gb-yn2re Рік тому +1

    21 days of leading folk through inner healing...

  • @prodigalflower1178
    @prodigalflower1178 Рік тому +10

    My 28 year marriage and once again not even a card for our anniversary! And yes, I think about him in gifts and a card every year! I'm deeply hurt this year more than ever, and I'm tired of him hurting me as if I'm not important enough to show some kind of love. He wouldn't even respond on Facebook to my post on our anniversary and I am so ashamed and embarrassed! I'm beginning to feel hate. Am I wrong for the way that I feel? 🤔 😢 😭 😢 😭

    • @GrowingInGraceBeloved
      @GrowingInGraceBeloved Рік тому +3

      Find a counselor for you so you can process your feelings and began to journal as well seek marital counseling and go for the both of you until he's ready to join

    • @sophiaharang1081
      @sophiaharang1081 Рік тому +2

      Xo Marriage is a wonderful program and they have trained counselors

    • @lorihanson273
      @lorihanson273 Рік тому

      Turn around marriage

    • @lilcowgirlsluvr
      @lilcowgirlsluvr Рік тому +2

      Praying for your marriage.

    • @olgavasilyeva1225
      @olgavasilyeva1225 Рік тому

      Have you expressed this to your husband?

  • @lynnramreddi3244
    @lynnramreddi3244 5 місяців тому +2

    How do I deal with a husband who does not keep up to his promises of fixing things around our home to create a better living space. I feel like I’m being taken for granted

  • @tanyadsouza1100
    @tanyadsouza1100 2 роки тому +6

    This video is so helpful

  • @brownsuga985
    @brownsuga985 2 роки тому +3

    Perfect timing

  • @PepperS72
    @PepperS72 8 місяців тому

    I'm not familiar with you, but I really like what you said here. It's just what I needed to hear today. Thank you for putting out great information to us!

  • @patriciapadgett3715
    @patriciapadgett3715 2 роки тому +22

    This works but not in harmful abuse. Get to safety and get help. Jesus never want you to suffer abuse that destroy you as a person. Normal problems in marriage is one thing but physical, emotional abuse is something totally different. Get help and get out of that kind of abuse!!!!

    • @colleendrake9661
      @colleendrake9661 8 місяців тому +2

      Agreed! We as humans cannot be Jesus. We can be like him - but I do not think that God has called us to live our lives like martyrs for Him to our spouse. If there is constant dishonesty and there is not apologetic and changed behavior then at that point you're just putting yourself through additional pain (and you're doing the work of two people to keep your marriage together). I can say that I have overcome some serious wounds in my marriage and if they ever re-surface and happen again - it will be time for me to go. There must be changed behavior that is lasting and continuous.

  • @Kimber_le
    @Kimber_le 8 місяців тому

    Thank you for these content I really appreciate it. It’s helping me through so much with my partner

  • @goodnesschidimma326
    @goodnesschidimma326 Рік тому +1

    Thanks so much pastor

  • @marye5828
    @marye5828 2 роки тому +2

    Very good.
    Thank you for explaining..

  • @shelawbrown7481
    @shelawbrown7481 2 роки тому +3

    God bless you
    This is helpful

    • @XOMarriage
      @XOMarriage  2 роки тому

      Glad it was helpful! Thank you so much for watching.

  • @MarianTorres-h2o
    @MarianTorres-h2o Рік тому

    Thankyou

  • @tonyalucas8555
    @tonyalucas8555 Рік тому +2

    Iv done all of this for 5 yrs and my spouse gets further away from God and our marriage I don't know what to do.

  • @joannawofford
    @joannawofford Рік тому

    Amen yes for sure

  • @awomansstory.2019
    @awomansstory.2019 2 роки тому +9

    My marriage was hurt 3.5 years ago. I found out on my family vacation that my husband was cheating on me. His mistress and my husband were in constant contact on their phones. ( Texting her as he ignored us.) How do I deal with this pain?

    • @saradanser894
      @saradanser894 2 роки тому

      Dan Mohler has an INTENSE marriage testimony

    • @danilaroche1156
      @danilaroche1156 Рік тому +2

      You do have grounds for divorce as adultery is a grave sin. In my case, my ex-husband was cheating with no remorse. It was chronic. We separated, but got counseling. I wanted reconciliation and was willing to forgive. He didn't care. We divorced & in retrospect, I'm glad. He was heavily demonized. Very much so.

    • @nikital4801
      @nikital4801 Рік тому +1

      Forgive. Christ knows ur pain nd he will reward u at the ryt time. Heaven is cheering 📣 u on.!

    • @huntergirl243boltaction3
      @huntergirl243boltaction3 Рік тому

      Its a biblical means for divorce. I can only imagine the pain.

    • @StormsHurt
      @StormsHurt 10 місяців тому

      @@danilaroche1156stop encouraging divorce based on your experiences. Just encourage her to pray, bless her husband and constantly seek God.

  • @daniellemarie5149
    @daniellemarie5149 Рік тому +3

    I’m about to give up on my marriage I try listening to you and changing my thoughts but my husband doesn’t treat me at all like he loves me I actually think he dispises me because of the side h**.

    • @AlohaAv
      @AlohaAv Рік тому

      My prayers go out to You.

    • @rebekah1836
      @rebekah1836 Рік тому

      I'm so sorry, my sister in Christ. I'm going thru similar stuff, but w/o the side h** [I think].
      If you need someone to chat with, I'm offering an understanding ear.

    • @adebanjo_moyosore
      @adebanjo_moyosore Рік тому

      How is your marriage now? Is it better?

  • @marksministry
    @marksministry 2 роки тому +10

    you can love somebody to your grave, but there is a limit to the abuse you're gonna tolerate. im in my car dec. 23, 11° outside bc my wife of 1 month yet again verbally attacked me and ive had enough.
    see all of this sounds good but how many emotional punches in the face does "jesus expect me to take"? how many?
    know what i was doing when this happened again for the 200th time in the last 2yrs? i was taking care of her hand and foot bc she is just out of surgery.
    for being a good husband this is what i get. theres no end to it.
    you can say let people slap you around but thats bullshit Jimmy! ive been abused my whole life and enough is enough! you got soo many answers but when youve been emotionally beaten enough then its over.
    to say it takes 2 for everything you address is absolutely unfair when its NOT 2 people, but ONE PERSON ATTACKING SOMEBODY ELSE.

    • @Applied_Pressure
      @Applied_Pressure Рік тому

      Men are called to lead the marriage spiritually. Are you leading her towards Christ? Are you watching these videos with her? Are you taking her to church, praying with her, reading scripture with her? Contacting your pastor for counsel with her?

    • @saytbtblog3341
      @saytbtblog3341 Рік тому

      Abuse is NEVER ok, never. No, Jesus doesn't not condone or tolerate this type of abuse. Its evil. Before you leave though, I would suggest a cool off period of separation, with the agreement to come back together on terms of Christian marriage counseling and also individual counseling for each of you to deal with traumas or whatever sort of circumstances that have a root that needs to be explored and pulled up as its affecting your lives. Read the Bible. During separation even reading the Bible together on zoom. You are not called to be abused verbally or in any manner, and Jesus doesn't expect anyone to stay in abusive situations BUT He does expect the attempt at reconciliation and you need help from others in doing so, hence counseling, your pastor.
      I am so sorry to hear you are going through all this. I pray it will get better and you and your marriage will be a blessed. I pray for whatever God's will, Will be. He has good for you, not harm

    • @danilaroche1156
      @danilaroche1156 Рік тому +5

      Doesn't sound like she knows the Lord. I know your hurting but don't attack Jimmy. No need to cuss. Take a break. Fast and pray on this. Get away for a while.

  • @shannonpetho9036
    @shannonpetho9036 Рік тому +2

    My husband of only 4 months refuses to give up over night stays with his guy friends, who give each other back rubs. He says it's normal behavior and I'm wrong for being insecure. He previously admitted to be curious about homosexuality. So I'm super fearful that he has done more with his buddies than he wants to admit. 😢

    • @olgavasilyeva1225
      @olgavasilyeva1225 Рік тому +3

      @shannonpetho9036
      Praying for God to give you wisdom, understanding, discernment and strength to keep fighting and what to do in every situation. Please gId strengthen and give this woman love and support l. Hold her through this. Please convict her husband. I rebuke any attack of the enemy and rebuke the spirit of homosexuality in the name of Jesus in her husband. Please show up in his life and show him how wrong he is for not respecting her boundaries and for anything else. Amen.

  • @sdo5618
    @sdo5618 Рік тому +3

    Dont agree on the seperation part it goes straight against 1 cor 7:10,11 but abuse shouldnt be tolerated on both sides.

  • @jensbornagain
    @jensbornagain Рік тому

    I am at a point of giving up been married 32 yrs 3 yrs ago I found out he had a 2 yr affair and after I found out I found out so much more. He was going to strip clubs behind my back when he knew before we got married I hate it. And also 32 yrs of porn I keep giving chances and chances and he keeps screwing up. I think he does it on purpose I asked him not to go to the store next to the strip club and he keeps saying he won’t go but then he goes again keeps saying he is sorry etc. he says I can’t get over this but he keeps taking me back I feel like my heart is dying. I was honest from the very beginning and he wasn’t. He actually said he lied to me so I would marry him. How can you fix something that seems like someone is tearing down on purpose.

  • @carolgoodenough3310
    @carolgoodenough3310 3 місяці тому

    Would love to have you at our church.

  • @unforkyours3lf730
    @unforkyours3lf730 Рік тому

    What's the redemptive scriptures?

  • @francessheeran7371
    @francessheeran7371 2 роки тому +11

    After 36 years? I’m just so freaking tired!

    • @saradanser894
      @saradanser894 2 роки тому +2

      Dan Mohler has an intense marriage testimony

    • @danilaroche1156
      @danilaroche1156 Рік тому +1

      Take a time out! Go on a mini vacation. Visit friends or family. Everyone needs a break. Fast and pray about marriage, as the Lord leads.

    • @Christian_counsel
      @Christian_counsel 9 місяців тому

      @@saradanser894I second this. Watch any Dan mohler video on marriage

  • @charleshunter1180
    @charleshunter1180 Рік тому +5

    I'd still rather not be married. I'm 60 never been married and not planning now. No thank you

    • @danilaroche1156
      @danilaroche1156 Рік тому

      Then why comment? How do you handle loneliness? What about sex? Hope you're not viewing pornography. I see alot of that with single men who don't care to marry.

    • @Tanniab09
      @Tanniab09 Рік тому +4

      ​@danilaroche1156 you spund like you're condemning this person. Marriage isn't for everybody and some are wise enough to know. God gives some people the grace to remain single.

  • @incognitoriaanonymousita
    @incognitoriaanonymousita Рік тому +1

    Or they are doing it on purpose and when you confront them about it they make excuses and play the blame game pointing fingers and changing the subject

  • @charleshunter1180
    @charleshunter1180 Рік тому +2

    69 sorry.

  • @smokyquartz5817
    @smokyquartz5817 10 місяців тому

    I'd rather be in a Saw film than married to Jimmy Evans. God forgive the pastors that get women and children killed.

    • @Nicole-ck9ss
      @Nicole-ck9ss 5 місяців тому

      He literally says in MANY videos not to tolerate true abuse.