Hi uhmm i really want advice on something:( I have a stalker who has a disorder thats affecting him. I really wanna be friends with him but he keeps making me uncomfortable and when i politely explain to him wrong from right, he just twists the story and make me seem like im ezzagerating or im the bad guy:( Idk what to do anymore, all im doing now is im avoiding them , this isnt the full story yall so pls dont judge me and ask if you wanna
@@camperellaillustz1995 if you have a stalker, the worst thing to do is to show them too much empathy. You don't have to be kind to someone who makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. You don't owe anyone your friendship. I would suggest staying away from him and advise adults / your parents (if you are young), especially if your stalker goes to the same school. Always stay polite (to keep things peaceful) but don't follow him anywhere or agree to do activities you don't want to. Listen to your gut feeling. Some people are good at guilt tripping others in order to hurt them.
10 signs: 1. They constantly make you prove yourself. 2. They communicate passively aggressively. 3. They gaslight you. 4. They are always "just joking". 5. They play the victim card. 6. They kill you with kindness. 7. They make your problems feel small. 8. They emphasize their calm, cool and collective side. 9. They use emotional blackmail. 10. They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature.
I didn't realize this was my ex for three years. He totally burnt me out and I cried almost every single night. Genuinely started to ask myself if I was crazy.
My parents tell me I always manipulate people into buying me stuff I want but I never realize it,i have realized that when me and my dad argue I already know he is gonna come in any second and give me my stuff back so I never really care..... help I think I manipulate.....
All or most of these describe narcissistic behaviour.This is deadly in the family .They are not worth the effort as they cannot love anybody even if they fawn all over you..You will never get consistent affection or support from them
I know this is told a lot but you should just be honest with them. there are always other people you can go to as well. I hope it gets better. I wish you the best. :)
i was being manipulated by my ex-bf. now I'm in relationship with a loving and caring guy and i realized I'm not supposed to have mental breakdown every night lol update: we broke up a month ago, he forced me to do things I didn't want to do. I guess I have to heal everything and only then get into a relationship or else it won't work
@@zutsmakeupcorner2374 you're not over reacting. you know he's toxic, you just try to deny it bcs you're scared. but you don't have to be, girl trust me, it may be hard but once you break up with him you're going to be so much more happy, i can promise that to you
One thing you might want to add is that manipulators try to convince you that to do things their way is in your best interest, but in reality it is not, it is only in their best interest.
yes patrick you are true especially in this phishing world one of my friend got a call i told her not to pick up but she listened to me as i explained her about the phishing going on what she did is she went a public telephone told that she feel uncomfortable to speak in front of parents in order to find the intention of the caller and she told him not to call in the cell as it is not her number you are correct they keep on convincing to do thing according to their interest she told yes yes gave some wrong address called up the police and the thieves were caught
beware manipulators are dangerous it can be your own friend they try to get things even in marriage market if you are engaged never introduce to your spouce once introduce they will recognise each other while conversing they may exchange mob number they will meet eachother and finally wedding will be their both s it has happened in one of my friends life this is the meaning of manipulation
The lower your self-esteem is, the worse your ability to defend yourself. So if you feel weak or insecure, it is important to get help and work with your self-image.
Mo Ab this is me I have very very low self esteem and ect. In my friend group I’m constantly feeling like i can’t say anything right, they laugh at me, though they are not 100% like mean but more like 70%. All my other friends are fine but there’s this one friend like for example this guy had a crush on me and my friend just kept laughing in the situation and I always feel like in my friend group I can never be myself. Like idk when the jokes are too far omg please help!! I literally don’t know when they are joking or when they are hurting me because 9/10 I have that gut feeling around them at school. I want to just walk away and not be such a pushover. I get angry thinking about this because they always laugh and I do nothing please help I really am stuck right now. For some reason to I have a feeling that I’ll be like more successful than my ‘friends’ one day? Like because I’m too nice to people and I help people idk I just have always a gut feeling in the future, I’ll prove them wrong idk
assia Taki no, not because they’re telling the truth, but when people manipulate events, play dumb, and do bad things to you indirectly to the extent that they make you question your memory. I don’t know how you wanted to sound with that sentence, but it sounded rude.
This video made me realize that I was the manipulator... I used to be so dramatic in middle school and acted pressured most of the time, it came to a point where my friends would get tired of my excuses. I was so ignorant of my actions... Thank you for making this video, it made me realize my true self and I hope that I can become a better person while in highschool... but at the same time I'm kinda scared to even go to high school since now I fear that my manipulative self will come back again... I'll try my best to fix myself as possible. But truly from the bottom of my heart... thank you for making this video... I'm truly grateful ❤
Introverted Mexican me too. I’ve realized through this video that I really have the best friends that don’t apply to any of these. But I feel like I do many of these a lot, and I want to improve myself too.
A lot of school is spent figuring out yourself. Aim to be a better person than you were before, and you'll be fine by the time you get out into the world of being an adult. You're young and developing; spend that time developing, not comparing with others and needlessly worrying.
I think at some point many people unknowingly become manipulative. I’ve done some of these things too but more and more I’m noticing it and trying to prevent it. It’s good to catch ourselves so we can improve it before it becomes our entire personality!
Every single manipulation tactic all but implies the use of the lying tactic and the gaslighting tactic. I actually dislike it a little calling out gaslighting as a manipulation tactic as it's actually an effect. All manipulation tactics will contribute to it by nature of what manipulation is. Some tactics however certainly take the gaslighting effect to a whole different level. Blatant lies that are so bad they insult your intelligence is one of them. That kind of shit will make you feel like you are in the twilight zone after a while. Here are some of the reasons they do this: To test their control. To feel superior and/or entertainment. This proves to themselves how much control they have over you. In the end, you will give up and you will not leave (trauma bonded). In the process of getting to the giving up stage, you will go through some pretty nasty emotional states ending in massive amounts of cognitive dissonance to swallow all of that. Cognitive dissonance is a trauma defense mechanism where you essentially lie to yourself in various ways so that you can bring back some semblance of equilibrium to the insanity you find yourself unable to escape from. As part of the ‘backing you into an emotional corner’ tactic. This is a tactic where you are manipulated into being emotionally unstable inevitably leading to you losing your shit. This gives the narcissist a big dopamine burst, they feel powerful and superior having so deftly controlled you and manipulated into this emotional state. To finish the little game they play, they make sure to point out how unhinged and unstable you are and suggest that perhaps you need help or medication. Of course, you will internalize all that shame and guilt and the million other raging emotions they have created and swallow all that essentially allowing them to scapegoat their blame and accountability onto you. Bring on some more cognitive dissonance and gaslighting effects. To condition you to expect less respect, and ultimately put up with more abuse. You will tire of the inevitable circular argument trying to convince the narcissist of the blatantly obvious lie and eventually find yourself challenging them less and less as you subconsciously accept the fact that if you do it will just make your life and emotional state more miserable and you will be denied the satisfaction of any kind of ‘win’ even if it is easy to disprove. This is part of the domination process and makes sure all the power in the relationship ends up with them by the end. To turn your mind to mush as the gaslighting effect takes hold more and more over time. This makes you even easier to control. Many times while easy to disprove it requires some kind of concession of some obvious truth that the narcissist can just doggedly refuse to agree with or remember (‘the intentional forgetting’ tactic and the ‘feigned confusion or ignorance’ tactics are often employed for this). So, in fact, it is not so easy to prove when the narcissist refuses to correctly remember what happened 10 min ago or accept sound logic or reasoning. You will just turn blue in the face trying. Of course, in some cases it is indisputable. A phone log or something. My experience is when this kind of stuff happens it wasn’t their intention typically, although sometimes it was. But in these scenarios, you will typically get some sort of angry ‘invalidating’ tactic, with some good old ‘manufactured rage’ and ‘intimidation’ tactics to ‘put you on the defensive’ and get you more susceptible to further manipulation. Maybe something like: “Get over yourself already” followed up by some ‘blame-shifting’ tactics with some good old ‘guilt’ and ‘shame’ tactics, like “Why the hell are you spying on my phone records anyway? What kind of relationship is this? I don’t have any privacy? I don’t know if I can do this anymore! You have major jealousy issues! You need help!” You will walk away as the loser either way. There are resistance tactics that can be used but this is a very difficult tactic to deal with and it is one of their favorites. I won’t get into the counter-tactics here though. The only way to really win in a relationship with a narcissist is to leave them and go no contact. Moreover, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done Metaspyhub@gmail. com,,
Thank you so much for posting this info. More than half of these signs are shown by my boyfriend of 7 years. I was blown away. I feel validated that I'm not just imagining things.
I do think so as I feel like I do that sometimes, for example giving gifts without reason, emphasizing my calmness and similar things. I sometimes feel like I manipulate my friends, they sometimes feel like they have to give something back although I don't ask for it and it feels a bit "unreal", if you know what I mean. Rethinking this message as well, this could be interpreted as falling into the victim role as the manipulator. Damn.
NICOLE TORRANCE you’re not imagining things Nicole! I too was in a seven year relationship that ended in a three month marriage!.... covert, underhanded manipulation! He had me exactly where he wanted me, walking on eggshells too afraid to rock the boat in case he’d leave!... in the end, I could tolerate not a second more! 11months after kicking him out I thank God every day that I am free from repression! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Get out and don’t look back, they truly don’t love you, they’re incapable! x anna x
Girl same my little brother tries to all the time. I think he got it from my dad. But it’s so embarrassing when he does it because I know exactly what he’s does and I call him out. I need to talk to my mom about him going to therapy because this breaks my heart that my 5 year old brother is a narcissistic manipulator.
As someone who had manipulative peers growing up, I can definitely tell you that I constantly felt like shit because of them, even for things that weren't my fault, playing the victim card, denying things when I called them out, and threatening to punish me if I called them out any further, you name it. I felt like I was the problem for years, but your videos have brought awareness to so many issues that I don't think I ever could've grasped on my own, and for that, I am grateful
I'm kind of dealing with this now unfortunately with a family member: 1. she gave me different stories as to why she left her job (we work together i basically got her the job) 2. she told me something about our other relative and basically said she doesn't want this other person tagging along with events with her and this 'friend" of hers because she swears this other relative is jealous of her friend instead of just goin directly to that person and talking with them. then basically in a round about way swore me to secrecy. and it's really bothering me but i don't want to hurt our relative by saying this to her and it would start drama. 3. she slips herself into my planned events with my child using another family member as backdoor to do it without even asking me if that's ok. does this sound manipulative??
The Gaslighting thing is so true! I thought that they just have bad memory... but thanks for telling me it is a manipulative technique. Now I know that they didn't forget anything, they are just lying... :) This channel is awesome!
Alyssa Watava I mean, it's kinda weird for me. Most of the times, the things my dad didn't admit to weren't even that big, so I thought that maybe i just didn't remember the situation correctly or whatever. But that one time he said that ,,me and my opinions mean nothing to him anyway" and it really hurted me. And when I tried to talk about it later, he just denied everything.
I was manipulated so much in childhood n thru the years that I became manipulative in relationships without even knowing it. Thank you for making this vid which helped me to become more self aware. Time to grow.
GingstaWorld I kinda think I’m manipulative, because I talk behind her back, since she’s always saying she’s ugly and I keep saying she just wants attention, but it’s not really talking behind her back since it’s actually true, when she got a boyfriend, the next day everybody knew because she told everyone, I’m too scared to tell her that, but I’m planning to do it soon.
You guys made me realise so many things. I always thought that I was being apathetic or rude and not aware of whether or not I was hurting people. When in reality, I was only just being manipulated. Thank you so much for sharing this. I really needed this.
Pooja Kameshwaran ...sigh.. And the worst thing is I'm doing it to someone who loves me world without end.... idk how to stop or why I'm even doing it because I really really hate it and always regret it.😞😞
@@khaeliag.gordon8722 I'm glad you at least have the heart to admit it and are willing to change. I agree that it happens unintentionally too. And it could be because of your love for them. So little by little maybe you should respect their boundaries and trust them a bit more. ♥️
Pooja Kameshwaran you kinda hit the nail on the head . . . trust, smh. Is like some times, they are just too simple. They can do so much more in life and with themselves but they shy away from it and I get so upset with them. I do love them, more than anything. Is just that I am angry that they don't see the potential I see in them. I hold them so high, yet they walk with their head hanged down...and because they put others above themselves, they put others above me... sometimes I feel I can never trust them to make the right decision for us, because they are going to make others walk over them.....this is so hard. I honestly have no bad intent, I swear. I can't believe I am struggling with this
@@khaeliag.gordon8722 If you want to change how you are, it's not going to happen in one day. You have to let it slowly evolve. Thanks to the internet, we have tons of articles that help us better ourselves. And strongly believing in the fact that you always mean well and care for them, will make you change yourself positively. Don't lose hope. It will happen soon enough♥️
One of my friends has most of these traits and I can't believe I have been normalising it. This video was just too relatable and I was able to be more aware of this. I thought she was just stressed so I didn't want to hurt my friend but apparently there's more to it than that. Thank you for making me be aware of these things.
*Moral of the story, do not trust everyone, even your own "friends". Choose who you associate with wisely, trust your gut instinct before you trust someone's smile and charming demeanor.*
*Moral of the story, trust only people who actually is willing to earn up for their mistakes cause in this world perfection doesn't exist. take precaution and recognize the repetitive red flags because if you continue you're only letting that person consume you emotionally and you'll be spoiling them the chances they dont deserve ..love yourself, trust, and love others cause there are people out there that can be family and hear you out. bubbling yourself with lethal confinement is easy but it'll trade to bitterness (^:
I respect your comment and agree with the overall message. Not everyone out there is a bad guy or not to be trusted, but it is wise to always have caution and as you said, "recognize the repetitive red flags"..
Its the classic projection move most narcissists employ. Its immaturity at its worst, really, as many of us while young and covering up hurt feelings have said something along the lines of "I'm not stupid! You are!" But the manipulative narcissists never develop past that.
My ex has all these signs (if not all, majority). Good thing I broke up with her even before the pandemic started. So at least, I only worried about the pandemic, without worrying being inside an abusive relationship. Now I'm happily single and have been enjoying it for two years now. And lesson for others who are in a relationship with an abuser, let go, learn to say no, and don't let them have power over you.
I love the cute little drawings that go along with these videos. They’re so fitting for giving a cartoon-like description of what the video topic is about.
By #6, I was crying. I knew something has been wrong in my relationship, so I came to this video. And as soon as #6 flashed across the screen, it’s as if I suddenly realized that they fit perfectly into 8 out of 10 of every one of these. You have no idea how much this video helped me. Thank you so so much.
The amount of times I found myself apologizing for something that wasn't my fault is embarrassing. But I see now that it was just the result of some really cunning manipulation.
I don't know if anyone will see this, but I feel it needs to be said. If you were/are in some kind of long-term manipulative relationship or environment, you sometimes can take on those manipulative quality's whether it be for self-preservation or simply a kind of mirroring from so much interaction with said manipulator(s) or environment. It's a normal thing, and doesn't make you a terrible person. That's why it's important to be just as aware of yourself as other people.
thank you because i was freaking out on whether or not i was a bad person when i realise i only ever do manipulate when im mirroring someone even so i will try my best to keep away from that and instead just remove the manipulator from my life.
Thank you so much. My counselor says “you’re not manipulative” and I’m like 🤨🤨 are you sure? It’s so hard to trust myself after manipulative abuse. Idk if you feel the same?
this is very true in my situation my mother in law displays all on this list but crazy enough my father in law now retired for 5 years has adopted more then half of her traits It's scary we all only see a glimpse of his former cool and kind self on occassion sad but I dont feel sorry for him because he 100% backs her terrible habbits and hurtful personality traits. They have destroyed my relationship in 3 short years of 12yr relationship sincw moving closer after our first child. I have started to see the traits in our daughter as well. Currently working on moving far away
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
This is very accurate. I used to be in a very toxic long distance relationship. As it turns out, both my ex girlfriend and I were manipulators. Manipulating each others actions on every turn. She was the type to love attention from everyone else which is what made me become jealous and insecure. At the same time, she was kind sweet, gave me so many gifts(we physically met)etc. I was the type to manipulate her with emotions. Becoming very needy, controlling, jealous. She wasn't any different. I couldn't even hangout with my brother without any repercussions. She couldn't hangout with her friends without any repercussions from me. We mirrored each other perfectly. But I have changed. I hope she has too. I learned my lesson and now I feel at peace. But it just goes to show that sometimes, either you mirror your partners actions, or you both are 2 sides of the same coin.
God, this is SO scary because I'm starting to realise that I've been dealing with this type of abuse my whole life. Seriously questioning whether I'm the one to blame. I think blame is usually shared in most cases. I've had thoughts of killing myself since I was a kid. I keep wondering if it's even possible to salvage any type of life worth living. I've had M.S. since 2005 .
Cold Eyes Yes I Had The Same Thing, but i wasn't so on the manipulative side, i did get jealous at points but it was because of my life situations, she had it better than me a bit, but she was the one who manipulated me the most and guilt tripping me and went by a friend and played victim and acused mé of dóing thát, ALOT Of Hell I Went through, also made me fall in love then turned on me just like that now of course i would lose my shit and get hurt then she just turned hostile and malovelent first hand then i get branded the bad piece of shit and she went by a friend of mine to Triangulating, another form of manipulation i learned of here and go off by him how i am this and that and doing this that to her, playing the victim to win him over to her side and ultimately got him to brand me a "someone like that" making me bad like i am such a horrible thing that would abuse and hit her and it went to mind games with me staying away from her cause of her hostility only for her to come and frantically cry by me i leave and ignore her "while she just wants to talk" and so forth and denied the hostile things she spew when i took her on over it, she even made this friend of mine to step on me too one time with shit when i tried crying by him for help for the pain i was going through but at least we still friends, All i know is i didnt and NEVER did this girl ANYTHING she was the one who came into my life and turned it around only to mess it all up again and even told me things about "i must not mess up others 'socalled fun" while in Gods name she was the one messing my life up...
I am ashamed to admit I am guilty of some of these examples 🙁, but not to such an extent or even being aware of what my behaviour was. Now I am aware I know better. These videos are good and educational. It helps me work on myself to be a better person . Thank you
@@myseveredwrjsts I hope you find the courage to make them see that you are too beautiful and loved and amazing to be manipulated. You deserve better! Have a great day! ❤
1. They constantly make you prove yourself. 2. Communicate passive aggressively 3. Gaslight you 4. They are always just joking. 5. They play the victim card. 6. They kill you with kindness 7. They make your problems feel small 8. They emphasize their calm , cool and collected side. 9. They use emotional blackmail. 10. They take advantage of your trusting & sensitive nature.
Even tho most of these apply to my sister and she makes me hate myself sometimes she told me she loved me because she sends me memes so it’s not toxic lmao
sadly, our culture and religious traditions idealize 'putting the needs of others ahead of your own' as a virtue, and not as a warning sign of having low self-worth, codependency, or susceptibility to narcissistic abuse!
Agree with you, be good, but not naive. You gotta be desagreeable and say no sometimes, even if it hurts others, but you always ask yourself "what is the worse my actions can cause?, if the other person feels bad is it my problem or his/hers? "
well the way of the world is not the same as the ways of God. The essence of it is to be a beneficial presence to others. People are going to try to take advantage of you either way you choose to move through this world but at the end of the day what you will be held accountable for is your own actions. Now having said that being beneficial to others does not always mean being a yes man. Jesus wasn't a yes man
Yes. It’s important to put others before yourself. But it’s even more important to recognise when that harms you and it’s seriously the hardest thing ever
It’s been 8 years, 8 Years! Yesterday I had to separate myself from my friend, and I felt terrible but it’s the only way. It’s sad how she makes me feel so worthless but I know that today I’m literally going to try and be friends with her. Honestly I’m tired of being the one that listens, why can’t I have a friend that also allows me to speak. Friends are people you should trust and have fun with, not someone that makes you feel useless and gives you trust issues.
This video make me realise something I never realise until now...I feel like I manipulate my friends...I want to stop it but I don't know how. I think I should stop being friends with them so they won't get hurt. When I ask if they feel manipulated or have a negative feel towards me they say no but I think differently. I need help. I don't know what to do.
I understand that 100%, over the past couple of days I've been doing a lot of self reflection and I've been wondering if I am manipulating people too. It's just gotta be one of those things you have to stop doing and improve yourself and how you interact with others.
i have this with my best friend!! i only have point 1. and i asked him 100 times if i'm a toxic friend. answer being "no" i love this guy with all my heart. and i don't wanna hurt him. i'm afraid that i'll hurt his feelings by asking him to be 100% honest, that he'll think i don't trust him. ;; but i don't trust myself.
This is why im moving out in january and going to my grandparents place. Even though ill probably lose the money my parents have saved for my college ed. I wouldbt doubt its just another way to hold a debt over me like I own them my life. Not anymore.
I was manipulated. They caused me to lose all my friends and then lost interest with me and moved on. I'm only just starting to get back the friends I lost, and I now have severe anxiety and trust issues...
Content like this has helped me come to terms with situations where the people who were very close to me in my life were using me and I am currently in therapy working through it. I really appreciate your resources. I don't think I would have sought help if I didn't come across free educational content like this, and it made me realize just how important content like this is to people who don't have as much accessibility. you guys are awesome. 💛
Well, most people do this to get a social advantage. Even me, my sister, teachers, classmates, or just about anyone who had been manipulated before/forced by their environment to manipulate others to get an advantage.
I was friends with someone who basically fit the entire description of being a manipulator. I unfortunately ended up dating this person for 10 months, but knew him for about 6 years. I wish I had found this video sooner, but such is life. The breaking point for me was when I spent time with other friends (who did also know my now-ex), and realized how great I felt when I was with them, but compared that feeling to how I would feel when I was with my ex. I talked to him about how I felt specifically about that, and he basically told me that my relationships with my friends weren’t meaningful, and that I just wanted something easy. That they weren’t meaningful because I wasn’t telling my friends I loved them and I wasn’t having sex with them. The second he said that, I just knew that that would be the last time I’d see him (especially considering he made my birthday really awful), and it became plain-as-day as to why nobody associated with him. I’m still really glad I watched this video though. It’s nice to spread awareness to those who may be completely oblivious. It’s a real eye-opener.
That's the thing with manipulation. People often don't realize that they are manipulating others. When two manipulators meet, its hazardous, and they often bring friends into it. I've seen it, and have found myself in similar positions... Although I hate it, bad habits die hard. For those of you out there who find that you yourself are a manipulator in some way, then watch closely to your actions. If you meet the wrong person, you may find yourself in a position of guilt for what you have done. Try not to manipulate others, and talk to your friends. Tell them to tell you if you hurt them, if you do something bad, and try to correct your actions...
Xavier P Parents manipulate???? Don’t I know it, my father ORDERED me, when I was 18, to go 200 miles to help him move house 10 days before my A levels started and when I told him about it he said.... well that’s your fault, if you’d done more work it wouldn’t now be a problem. That was 30 years ago and he’s dead now but I remember that every day.
@@haranoa0620 hi! Believe it or not, this person changed most of those behaviors, kind of a miracle. Still, the drama hasn't completely disappeared, so stay tuned(? I do want to clarify that, if anyone told me they have a similar experience, I would tell them to lose touch. It's so different when it's you who should stay strong :(
Hi, what did you do to help your situation? I’m in this situation with my husband and I don’t know where to start because I don’t even know how to speak up anymore.
@@gracie912 hello Psych2Go also made a video titled How to deal with manipulative people. You can search it. I'm dealing with a person being manipulative to me right now and I'm glad I watched this video. I wanted to save our relationship, I just want him to see how manipulate he is and hoped for the best he will realize.
A manipulator who throws subtle comments implying they know you better than yourself is the worst I’ve come across. They act like you malfunctioned when things didn’t go their way, exactly by comparing you to their delusional version of you from when you first meet like the ‘good times’. I experienced this from a guy who had nothing more but emotional needs and problems. I admit that it was obvious to see then, why I didn’t act sooner I do regret and feel so foolish since I didn’t take my intuition seriously just cause I was the nice thoughtful person in the circle Yep, I need to set boundaries in all my relationships now ☔️ thankful for this channel
Theres a trick you can do about that; get two interests in youtube then when an ad comes straight up click on the next then as the video is loading get ready for the next!! This is a manipulation strategy that is used with power and people!!! Haha
I'm sorry, they don't deserve you! I get that it's hard but they WANT you to be in their control, which doesn't mean they're your actual friend. I wish you good luck though !
Thank you for helping me realize my best friend is manipulating me. And has been for a long time. She’s been gaslighting me and making me feel like the bad guy, and I’m realizing it’s her. I’ve set boundaries before, but she never followed them. I’ve decided to tell her we are not friends anymore. She played victim, saying how much she cared for me and never wanted anything back. And she said that in a science project we did, she never wanted to do it with me, and she did it with me because she trusted me and that we were friends. She said, “I never meant to hurt you!”. But she did urge me. She always says she never means to do things. But she does do things that hurt me. She’s either super unaware, or super manipulative. It’s both.
I saw this video before ending up in an abusive relationship, with a manipulator. Remembering this video was what made me start to question his behavior. Thank you for saving me.
i saw this video and was confirmed that my long time gf was manipulating me, which i already suspected. i'm currently in the process of manipulating her back for some revenge for a few more months before i leave. this'll be soooo fun ;)
I was accused of guilt tripping and being toxic. I did freak out and was a bit obsessive because I cared that much. I felt like it was my job to keep them happy. I gone through hell just to make them happy. Though I probably became toxic. And he said I was toxic and he doesn't wanna be my friend anymore. I was kinda unaware what I was doing I was just trying to help.
Rule number three, wear your heart on your cheek But never on your sleeve, unless you wanna taste defeat -- _Marina and The Diamonds_ Thanks for the video, I needed this info, I have a few people who just love playing victim
I’ll admit I’m watching this so I can catch myself. I’ve never meant to manipulate my girlfriend, I love her with all my heart, but she always felt like she ended up apologizing to me for my mistakes. I’m trying to catch these signs now so I can stop and treat her the way she deserves. If you have any suggestions please let me know Edit: Thank you for all the feedback! I have been doing much better today with my girlfriend and we are learning more and more how to be in a Godly relationship where we both can put one another first, and have started taking better responsibility for our mistakes. When realizing that none of my issues were from a place to control her, but from a place to try and show my empathy. Thank you again for all of this God bless you
Please change because you will kill her from the inside. Everything isn't about you in a relationship and you should freely give forgiveness and be compassionate if she makes mistakes to combat the toxicity
I know this is kind of a late response, but hopefully I can help in some way. I'm on my way to getting a psychology degree, and everything I'm about the say is complete speculation of course. Hope this helps! One of the main things to look out for within your relationship is who compromises more. Manipulators often will force the other individual within a relationship to compromise and apologize to them, rather than taking accountability for their actions. They'll often put on this facade of perfection, and it makes the other person feel as though they are never right. As you've stated, it sounds like your girlfriend apologizes very often, so this sounds like a red flag (once again, this is speculation). Another thing to consider is what her attachment style is. There are three main types of attachment: preoccupied attachment, avoidant attachment, and secure attachment within any relationship. Preoccupied attachment occurs when an individual feels that they need to be overly cautious and overly affectionate and expressive of their needs in order to have love. This it because when they were younger, they may not have gotten consistent affection from their guardians and/or loved ones, so they learned to become overly attached to people in order to have some morsels of love. Avoidant attachment is the exact opposite. People with an avoidant attachment style tend to run away from the other individual and not show their true feelings in order to preserve their emotional state. People who do this, do this because when they were younger, they may have been taught that their emotions weren't valid or that no one wanted to hear or validate them, so they learned, over time, that expressing their emotions meant hurt, pain, and maybe even abuse in serious cases. Secure attachment is, well, secure. People with secure attachment are right in the middle: they express their needs, while understanding their boundaries. They know what they want, and they understand their emotions are valid, and that its okay to express them. If your girlfriend is apologizing a lot, it may not have to do with you necessarily. It may be that she has a preoccupied attachment style due to childhood trauma. Once again, I'm really speculating here, and I'm not accusing you or your girlfriend of anything. She may feel the need to constantly apologize and compromise in order to keep you around, so discuss that with her. If you're very concerned, I would highly recommend going to a couples therapist if possible. If you truly have manipulative tendencies, you were probably modeled that from guardian(s) and it's important to receive help. If your girlfriend has a preoccupied attachment style, it's important for you both to work through that to have a truly healthy relationship. I hope this helps! Once again, I understand this is a late response, but I truly hope you read this and that it helps at least a little bit. As I've said before, this is complete speculation and based on what little I've learned so far for my psychology degree, so please don't take my word for it and, if you can, go to a licensed therapist to discuss these issues.
I used to have a friend like this. At first she was amazing, and fun to be around, but than she changed when we her deeper into the friendship. She started to small things at first, acting like she knew everything and I was just a child. She made me feel like I was always over reacting. At a point she started hitting me. Not to hard, but it still hurt. She acted like it was normal when I told her to stop. We aren’t friends any more.
I know exactly what you are talking about. I got rid of a friend like that and she took a bunch of people from our circle with her. Fuck em man. Not worth it.
I'm living a similar situation, but the gaslighting was so hard in the beginning that I didn't really know if I was being manipulated or started to see things where they doesn't exist. The difference is that I'm already in a (long) relationship. I and my partner are recovering from a bad moment and it happened with her too. It seems to us that people will try to gain advantage over us in our weakness always when they can. This situation is even worse and extremely uncomfortable because of that. Blocked her yesterday (the "friend"). I still don't know exactly what to say to her when I meet her again at college, but is better to take an attitude than react to things when they happen. F*ck.
Thank you for the help . This just proves most of my "friends" are manipulating me , my brother has gaslighted me before , and sadly enough so have most of my friends .
Be careful with that. Im definitely not saying it's not possible or likely and I am saying, avoid labelling what isn't gaslighting, gaslighting, if it's not gaslighting. My ex was told and/or read all this "narcissist" crap and started interpreting all my behaviors based on that, but it was wrong, very wrong. And she caused me a lot of risk at that point. I was harmless and she would barely have a 2 way conversation.
Fuck it gets bad, “you don’t remember everything”, “why do you think you know everything” “I KNOW what happened” they can target the smallest detail and made me feel little, dumb and crazy.
How to avoid these things: 1. Just don't have friends or family cut all ties with anybody talk only to random strangers on the internet for 2 days and you're good.
Thats been my strategy for the last 20 years. There's a great country song by Merle Haggard called "From Now on, All of My Friends are Gonna Be Strangers". It's a beauty...great lyrics.
I started crying when I was listening to the reasons because I’ve been so blinded to not noticed how my toxic friend was most all of these. I’ve been ignoring the red flags but I can’t anymore Edit: If anyone’s curious on why I made this whole comment was because at that time, i was friends with a really toxic person. She would cut in front of me or in class because she was “stressed” about the homework but would immediately stopped when I offered to do it for her. She also copied my homework. She also flirted with my boyfriend at the time and claimed she didn’t like him but always talked about him holding her hand, grabbing her thigh, etc. When quarantine started, she only really talked about herself and didn’t care what I had to say. Another edit!: At the time, one of my other friends confronted her on the things she was doing to me and denied everything. Then we stopped talking completely afterwards. I still see her every now and then but haven’t gone back to how it was. To everyone in the same situation, you got this! Don’t let anyone bring you down ❤️
My only friend in the city i live rn is my cousin...and we were "friends" for 8 years and i only realised how toxic she is when she stopped hanging out with me...im still not over the fact that i isolated myself from everyone to please her and she just dumped me cuz im no use to her anymore...i still have other friends of mine thank god but i thought she was one of those real and good friends..sad thing is that i feel so dumb and stupid for believing her...
And yeah same i was crying so bad like im 17 years old and we have been friends for 8 years...but it will get better...hope you guys find good friends in future and im wishing you all luck❤
I broke up with my boyfriend a little less than a week ago because I was being told by everyone around me that he was manipulating me into thinking that everything was my fault when in reality it was his actions that caused the disagreement. Eventually, I realized that these accusations were true, so I made the decision for myself to end things despite me still having feelings for him. I decided today that I would look up to see just how much he may have manipulated me aside from the things I had noticed on my own. This video really helped me to realize that I made the best decision, so thanks.
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
I wish I saw this and realized the signs when I was with my ex. He was so manipulative to me and someone else, as well as emotionally and mentally abusive. So glad that he's (hopefully) out of our lives.
00:19 They constantly make you prove yourself 00:42 They communicate passive-aggressively 01:13 They gaslight you 01:16 GASLIGHT 01:42 Are always just joking 02:14 They play the victim card 02:41 They kill you with kindness 03:05 They make your problems feel small 04:28 They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature
"They communicate passive aggressively" "They play the victim card" "They make your problems feel small" "They use emotional blackmail" "They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature" I wish I had seen this video before I met my groomer.
This is my situation they always guilt trip me when they cheat its never their fault its always the other persons fault always want sex and when I say I'm tired I get hit with all the passive aggressive lines I've said I want to end this relationship I get hit with I'm going to kill myself but the next day it's if I leave you I know your going to kill yourself last night I got called a bitch and was threated I don't need this type of abuse at all I just feel stuck I don't want to be the cause of someonea death but I don't want to be in a relationship that has turned bad
This is so true... I've been manipulated by this girl I found through the internet. I thought she was just such a good person etc. She always acted so nice and that... I thought she was helping mental problems and when she "cut all ties with me" I was devastated... I thought I did everything wrong. She always made feel horrible because she also had her mental illnesses. And it was always about hers, even when I finally got a word in about mine she would always one up me. Making me just feel like I was overreacting on my illnesses. And that I was just weak... We fought a lot... most of the time she would get mad at me for something small and then in the end I was the one apologizing. For saying something mean in the fight. I'd feel horrible for days over that thing. About 2 months ago, we fought again. This time she was just "done with me" and told me to not text her again and stuff like that. After about 2 days, she texted me again. Apologizing and stuff like that. This time was different for me though. Idk what in me told me to just not text her back... I loved this girl, I'd give up anything for her. Buy for some reason... I didn't text her back. I've been getting constant messages from her daily. About her being sorry, and if we could talk. Every time, I ghosted her. Since then... I've felt better. I feel better each day, every time I think of her though I still get a small pit in my stomach. Feeling that I'm doing something wrong. But I know it's right... She was just manipulating me. I even cut off some ties with friends to text her since she was demanding of my attention... And she would show love to me etc. Making me feel loved... I've only just now gotten back to the friends I've cut off. And have apologized to them a lot. Manipulation isn't fun...
lelbot1000: You sound like a very nice man. Real love doesn’t criticize you, hurt you, manipulate you. You will find a wonderful woman if you truly have loving qualities and good intentions.
Everyone manipulates. Most people have not been shown how to ask for their needs to be met in healthy ways, so manipulation is how they do it...plus we are all traumatised to some degree. Manipulation is a way to establish a sense of control. Manipulators are made out to be evil people when most of the time they are just trying to get their needs met in unhealthy ways and don't know how it affects the other person. There's a percentage of sociopathic types who know they are doing it and do it for their own amusement and power. They're the hardest to deal with.
It's hard if it's within your family. But if it's your friend, just follow your path, say that you don't have time right now. Make your life filled with events, it'll make you grow as a person and will make that manipulative person go away on it's own. There should be some events about professional skills, how to use your knowledge... Or just start to study some language and whenever he want's to do something you can say that you are occupied with study. I have the same fate, but that guy is my sisters husband and I just don't talk to him more than enough, we don't live in same house, just the same city. -.- I don't know how much time I wasted on him, to help him with his ''problems''. When I need something or just want to talk, his reply is: say what you need, I don't have time. When there is a problem, they would wait for me 2hrs (time to get to their house by walking) to start doing something that they need. They wont start unless I'm there -.- That's what I hate the most, it's like they don't have hands or brain... But when we need to study (or something like that), they can't wait a single sec... Now I contact them only when it's urgent and my life became more durable :) My message to you, hang on a little longer until you can move out (if you live with them).
Just broke up with someone, and I'm crying because I'm able to relate to every single point :'), now he is gaining sympathy from everyone I know and asking me to get back with him, I'm sick of ppl like him, i just wanna stay alone
Same I suggest looking into stuff about empaths and narcissists. It’s a classic combination that happens where empaths who are generally very sensitive, loyal, and soft-hearted get targeted by narcissists. They are basically magnetized to one another. An empath feels too much and the narcissist has a lack of empathy if not no empathy at all so it starts out almost as innocent curiosity. Both parties see something in the other that’s very alluring but the narcissist has a very sensitive ego so the empath unknowingly sets off triggers just with any flippant comment and the narcissist punishes them in some way. If the abuse was as bad as it was in my case it could cause lasting mental health issues but I have grown tremendously in a short time once I learned that it wasn’t my fault. I wasn’t stupid and wrong about everything. The times I called their bad behavior out I WAS right and should not have apologized. I do mantras now. Tell myself I am worthy of love. I’m not stupid etc. it sounds corny but it helps. I’m getting therapy too which I recommend. Be very careful about being self-deprecating around ANYONE until you know them a little better because the world is full of those people and they will pounce on the opportunity to have a new insecure person whom they can belittle to stroke their egos. I swear I moved into a new place and my landlord I showed a little weakness and she started treating me like complete dirt then I went oh wait fuck that and told her I’m looking for a new place cuz she’s a psychopath next thing I know her husband is begging me not to move out and says he talked to her and she won’t do it again. It might be another manipulation ploy but she hasn’t bothered me since. You can rebuild yourself. Go to the gym, eat healthy, don’t say negative things about yourself, forgive the people who hurt you, move on, and have pride in yourself. I told my bullies no mad and lost the only 2 friends I had but I instantly felt transformed. It’s still work but yeah sorry for long message.
I feel like that too, I really feel like that. But hey in the end being a magnet to those types of people just means you can spot them out quicker each time
I'm going to be honest here..I did half of these things to my friends. I feel really bad. I probably the first 3-4. But the rest is not me, I actully care about my friends and always try to help them. I will try to change. Thank you
Amadour Lopez I’m sorry that you seem to have very bad experiences with Christians. Christians are NOT supposed to that. We Christians are supposed to just plant the seed of the idea of Jesus and that is it. No forcing or anything. Those people who shove the Bible in other’s faces are not true Christians. They just make the real ones look awful. They get everybody to hate the TRUE Christians.
A couple months ago I realized I've been in a toxic friendship for 10 years...we meet in grade school, and while others tried to tell me she wasn't any good for me, or that she was manipulating me I always jumped right to her defense. Watching this is kinda hard, recognizing her having done most of these things to me
feel ya, its hard to set boundaries with family members, when all minor tries to find a solution dont work, i guess its distance for you. I personally got a shitty family too and i just moved away and broke up with that part of my life. Unless I see that their behavior wont stop, i wont talk to them, dont need negativity in my life, neither do you.
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
I recently got out of a toxic and incredibly manipulative group of friends, however this isn't the first time I have tried to leave, I have tried to separate myself from them for some time now, but one way or another, I got pulled right back in. To be honest, it kinda felt like i was betraying them. I would find myself thinking /sure, there are some bad parts, but they were there for you!/ Is that even normal?! I feel like they slowly turned me into them, looking back, at one point, I was pretty toxic too! When I first met them, I was young and naive. Easily manipulated. Now that I'm finally out of it, I am completely different. Some of these changes I /did/ make on my own, but should I feel ashamed and regretful about them??
HOLY BUTTS. That's the same way I am! My friends will give me small things, like answers to homework problems, and then when I realized they were toxic and I tried to leave, I felt bad because I always love to return favors and make people feel loved. _They gave you things, things they worked for and you didn't,_ is what I would tell myself. _You should return the favor before you go, or they'll feel you're ungrateful._
I had a similar “friend” and it completely sucks (it still sucks) any time i had a problem or have had a crappy day she would bring up her parents divorce that happened when she was three so i felt bad so i never left (but also she was scary) and now that i found a great friends everyone asks me why i don’t hang out with her.
(Instead of using /insert word here,/ you can put these: _ before and after what you say, like this: _ manipulative _ =without spaces, _manipulative_ )
I was on the verge of being manipulated once. He would always get mad at me whenever I was doing anything without him or if I prioritised my own time, he wouldn't talk to me unless I apologised for doing literally nothing and he always made fun of me for one thing or the other, whilst also complaining to me about being bullied when he was younger, and even insulted me behind my back to my friend. I got fed up and simply said, "Not anymore, sucker!" and blocked him. Perhaps it was simpler for me, but… Jeez I got off easy.
psykoberry you are lucky, I got manipulated and lost money to it, luckily I got out of it over time. I’m glad you didn’t get manipulated and did the right thing! ❤️
I think they can. Manipulation can be intentional or unintentional. The most dangerous kinds are the ones who know exactly what they're doing and they continue to do it. But, those who reflect on their actions do the most growing.
Me too. I kinda hate myself for being like that but idk if I could live through my current situation otherwise. My father is one as well and so was his father.
I have this friend, and one day I invited her over, and I went to the bathroom and when I came back she was going through my freakin search history, and she found an "Are my friends toxic quiz" I took about a week ago. She acted super offended, and I was trying to calm her down by telling her that the results were negative, (which actually wasn't the case) Anyways, she told everyone about it, and how I made her cry, acting like she was the victim. To this day, she still says stuff like, "remember that time you made me cry? How do you feel about that, hm?" In front of people, and I go into full guilt-mode, and when I DON'T show her that I'm guilty, she acts all annoyed and cold at me. I have finally come to realize what's been going on, and I am working on setting boundaries. This video was such great help to me!
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
Whenever I try to bring up an issue or concern (ex: his excessive sugar intake), my ex would constantly say “you don’t love me if you don’t accept me”. If we fight, he would always say “do you still love me?” instead of explaining or apologizing.
My dad fits most of these too. I bet he’s doing it intentionally, because every time I or another family member has confronted him about it, he says he’s going to change but he doesn’t.
Ya, mine too. It's such a hard thing to realize, so no one ever really cares and there is no obvious excuse to get out. I'm just waiting 'til the day I turn 18.
It's so sad that this happened to me without fully realizing the situation. I wish my bestfriend didn't do this, I was honest and he knew that I had trust issues even before. Regardless, he still did what he did and it hurt me. Manipulation sucks, I'm happy I'm out of that friendship and I can continue to be myself and still be kind with others but it's getting harder for me to form deeper bonds because I'm scared it might happen again.
I was raised by a woman exactly like all of these and it set me up on a pattern of being treated this way by others my entire life . I am finally starting to heal from it thanks for sharing very helpful!
New video: Signs You're Dealing with An Evil Person:
ua-cam.com/video/ewqU3cti_Rw/v-deo.html
Hi uhmm i really want advice on something:( I have a stalker who has a disorder thats affecting him. I really wanna be friends with him but he keeps making me uncomfortable and when i politely explain to him wrong from right, he just twists the story and make me seem like im ezzagerating or im the bad guy:( Idk what to do anymore, all im doing now is im avoiding them , this isnt the full story yall so pls dont judge me and ask if you wanna
Woww. This is spot on. I need to get out of my situation badly. This made me realize how manipulative and toxic this person is.
What if somwone has only one to two of these habits.. are they manipulators as well??
I need your help
@@camperellaillustz1995 if you have a stalker, the worst thing to do is to show them too much empathy. You don't have to be kind to someone who makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. You don't owe anyone your friendship. I would suggest staying away from him and advise adults / your parents (if you are young), especially if your stalker goes to the same school. Always stay polite (to keep things peaceful) but don't follow him anywhere or agree to do activities you don't want to. Listen to your gut feeling. Some people are good at guilt tripping others in order to hurt them.
We were all thinking about that one friend...
nah my friend is actually real
Yep. And I cut him off for good today, thanks to this video.
U mean that one enemy, I've never had friends in my life and I love it that way
HOW DID U KNOW🤯🤯🤯
Yep
“Manipulators often target insecure, sensitive, and trusting people.”
Wow. The definition of me.
Same.
😂😂😂😂
me ;-;
the most annoying thing is that we all forget about signs bc we want to enjoy
Introvert Teenager nailed it! Same here!
10 signs:
1. They constantly make you prove yourself.
2. They communicate passively aggressively.
3. They gaslight you.
4. They are always "just joking".
5. They play the victim card.
6. They kill you with kindness.
7. They make your problems feel small.
8. They emphasize their calm, cool and collective side.
9. They use emotional blackmail.
10. They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature.
So you just summed up my high school friends that I don't keep in contact with anymore.
True
I didn't realize this was my ex for three years. He totally burnt me out and I cried almost every single night. Genuinely started to ask myself if I was crazy.
My parents tell me I always manipulate people into buying me stuff I want but I never realize it,i have realized that when me and my dad argue I already know he is gonna come in any second and give me my stuff back so I never really care..... help I think I manipulate.....
All or most of these describe narcissistic behaviour.This is deadly in the family .They are not worth the effort as they cannot love anybody even if they fawn all over you..You will never get consistent affection or support from them
It really hurts when you're re kinda remembering someone right now and realize what they did
Literally...
Exactly, Shame.on them
I’m literally so frustrated trying to realize what they’ve done versus what I’ve done LOL
I can’t believe my aunt manipulated me like that…
I used to call her my best friend but after this I cannot
"ur being too sensitive" hit close to home lmfao
" this shit not even real"
Especially if your someone like me that has HSP (highly sensitive person)
exactly! my ex-friend did all of these things, and it hurt ngl but she mostly said i was too sensitive
Right that's the only argument he gives me
“ it’s just a joke , chill”
Thank you for informing me that my friends are manipulative
it is worse than you are even aware of
Ouch..
My friend is a manipulator!!!!!!!!!!! 😨😱😱😱😨😱😱😱😨😱😱😱
Me too, but I wonder if they would think we are manipulators to them
I know this is told a lot but you should just be honest with them. there are always other people you can go to as well. I hope it gets better. I wish you the best. :)
i was being manipulated by my ex-bf. now I'm in relationship with a loving and caring guy and i realized I'm not supposed to have mental breakdown every night lol
update: we broke up a month ago, he forced me to do things I didn't want to do. I guess I have to heal everything and only then get into a relationship or else it won't work
Same I'm currently trying to break up with my toxic bf but I feel bad
zosia ping I think I’m in the same situation... idk what’s the right thing to do. maybe I’m overreacting?
@@zutsmakeupcorner2374 you're not over reacting. you know he's toxic, you just try to deny it bcs you're scared. but you don't have to be, girl trust me, it may be hard but once you break up with him you're going to be so much more happy, i can promise that to you
@@weronikawisz7011 just do it 💜 everything will be fine, don't worry
Update he said he'll change and do everything to stay with me cuz he loves me hehe
One thing you might want to add is that manipulators try to convince you that to do things their way is in your best interest, but in reality it is not, it is only in their best interest.
yes patrick you are true especially in this phishing world one of my friend got a call i told her not to pick up but she listened to me as i explained her about the phishing going on what she did is she went a public telephone told that she feel uncomfortable to speak in front of parents in order to find the intention of the caller and she told him not to call in the cell as it is not her
number you are correct they keep on convincing to do thing according to their interest
she told yes yes gave some wrong address called up the police and the thieves were caught
beware manipulators are dangerous it can be your own friend they try to get things
even in marriage market if you are engaged never introduce to your spouce once introduce they will recognise each other while conversing they may exchange mob number they will meet eachother and finally wedding will be their both s it has happened in one of my friends life this is the meaning of manipulation
Frr
100% true - this is so painful to realised you've been manipulated :(
Exactly
The lower your self-esteem is, the worse your ability to defend yourself. So if you feel weak or insecure, it is important to get help and work with your self-image.
👍✔💯
Mo Ab this is me I have very very low self esteem and ect. In my friend group I’m constantly feeling like i can’t say anything right, they laugh at me, though they are not 100% like mean but more like 70%. All my other friends are fine but there’s this one friend like for example this guy had a crush on me and my friend just kept laughing in the situation and I always feel like in my friend group I can never be myself. Like idk when the jokes are too far omg please help!! I literally don’t know when they are joking or when they are hurting me because 9/10 I have that gut feeling around them at school. I want to just walk away and not be such a pushover. I get angry thinking about this because they always laugh and I do nothing please help I really am stuck right now. For some reason to I have a feeling that I’ll be like more successful than my ‘friends’ one day? Like because I’m too nice to people and I help people idk I just have always a gut feeling in the future, I’ll prove them wrong idk
Mo Ab Is it bad my best friend who I think is manipulating me has a worse self esteem than me?
But how?
@@futuristiccat5636 trust your gut and feelings.
I HATE IT WHEN THEY SAY “You’re just imagining, don’t make a big deal out of it.”
Ikr. Then they will say you assume too much and overthink. Then they will play the victim card
assia Taki no, not because they’re telling the truth, but when people manipulate events, play dumb, and do bad things to you indirectly to the extent that they make you question your memory. I don’t know how you wanted to sound with that sentence, but it sounded rude.
I hate that shit to my favorite one is it is all in your head go see a doctor and get on meds fuck that and fuck medication
@@Itskeshy_ SAMEEE
@@Itskeshy_ same here
This video made me realize that I was the manipulator...
I used to be so dramatic in middle school and acted pressured most of the time, it came to a point where my friends would get tired of my excuses. I was so ignorant of my actions...
Thank you for making this video, it made me realize my true self and I hope that I can become a better person while in highschool... but at the same time I'm kinda scared to even go to high school since now I fear that my manipulative self will come back again...
I'll try my best to fix myself as possible.
But truly from the bottom of my heart... thank you for making this video... I'm truly grateful ❤
Introverted Mexican me too. I’ve realized through this video that I really have the best friends that don’t apply to any of these. But I feel like I do many of these a lot, and I want to improve myself too.
Same here too.
A lot of school is spent figuring out yourself. Aim to be a better person than you were before, and you'll be fine by the time you get out into the world of being an adult. You're young and developing; spend that time developing, not comparing with others and needlessly worrying.
@@KarmaSangheili thank you for your attention, I'll keep that in mind ❤
I think at some point many people unknowingly become manipulative. I’ve done some of these things too but more and more I’m noticing it and trying to prevent it. It’s good to catch ourselves so we can improve it before it becomes our entire personality!
Every single manipulation tactic all but implies the use of the lying tactic and the gaslighting tactic. I actually dislike it a little calling out gaslighting as a manipulation tactic as it's actually an effect. All manipulation tactics will contribute to it by nature of what manipulation is. Some tactics however certainly take the gaslighting effect to a whole different level. Blatant lies that are so bad they insult your intelligence is one of them. That kind of shit will make you feel like you are in the twilight zone after a while. Here are some of the reasons they do this: To test their control. To feel superior and/or entertainment. This proves to themselves how much control they have over you. In the end, you will give up and you will not leave (trauma bonded). In the process of getting to the giving up stage, you will go through some pretty nasty emotional states ending in massive amounts of cognitive dissonance to swallow all of that. Cognitive dissonance is a trauma defense mechanism where you essentially lie to yourself in various ways so that you can bring back some semblance of equilibrium to the insanity you find yourself unable to escape from. As part of the ‘backing you into an emotional corner’ tactic. This is a tactic where you are manipulated into being emotionally unstable inevitably leading to you losing your shit. This gives the narcissist a big dopamine burst, they feel powerful and superior having so deftly controlled you and manipulated into this emotional state. To finish the little game they play, they make sure to point out how unhinged and unstable you are and suggest that perhaps you need help or medication. Of course, you will internalize all that shame and guilt and the million other raging emotions they have created and swallow all that essentially allowing them to scapegoat their blame and accountability onto you. Bring on some more cognitive dissonance and gaslighting effects. To condition you to expect less respect, and ultimately put up with more abuse. You will tire of the inevitable circular argument trying to convince the narcissist of the blatantly obvious lie and eventually find yourself challenging them less and less as you subconsciously accept the fact that if you do it will just make your life and emotional state more miserable and you will be denied the satisfaction of any kind of ‘win’ even if it is easy to disprove. This is part of the domination process and makes sure all the power in the relationship ends up with them by the end. To turn your mind to mush as the gaslighting effect takes hold more and more over time. This makes you even easier to control. Many times while easy to disprove it requires some kind of concession of some obvious truth that the narcissist can just doggedly refuse to agree with or remember (‘the intentional forgetting’ tactic and the ‘feigned confusion or ignorance’ tactics are often employed for this). So, in fact, it is not so easy to prove when the narcissist refuses to correctly remember what happened 10 min ago or accept sound logic or reasoning. You will just turn blue in the face trying. Of course, in some cases it is indisputable. A phone log or something. My experience is when this kind of stuff happens it wasn’t their intention typically, although sometimes it was. But in these scenarios, you will typically get some sort of angry ‘invalidating’ tactic, with some good old ‘manufactured rage’ and ‘intimidation’ tactics to ‘put you on the defensive’ and get you more susceptible to further manipulation. Maybe something like: “Get over yourself already” followed up by some ‘blame-shifting’ tactics with some good old ‘guilt’ and ‘shame’ tactics, like “Why the hell are you spying on my phone records anyway? What kind of relationship is this? I don’t have any privacy? I don’t know if I can do this anymore! You have major jealousy issues! You need help!” You will walk away as the loser either way. There are resistance tactics that can be used but this is a very difficult tactic to deal with and it is one of their favorites. I won’t get into the counter-tactics here though. The only way to really win in a relationship with a narcissist is to leave them and go no contact. Moreover, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done Metaspyhub@gmail. com,,
Wow! You summed up my life's troubles. Thanks 👍
Tldr
I am not gonna read that long ass paragraph.
@@limeflavoredbleach5570 😂😂 it was interesting nevertheless
How did these 203 person read this? :)
Thank you so much for posting this info. More than half of these signs are shown by my boyfriend of 7 years. I was blown away. I feel validated that I'm not just imagining things.
Anytime! I hope that everything works out for you. Feel free to reach out! We are always here for you
Is it possible to accidentally and (or) subconsciously manipulate someone
I unfortunately married my manipulator...
I do think so as I feel like I do that sometimes, for example giving gifts without reason, emphasizing my calmness and similar things. I sometimes feel like I manipulate my friends, they sometimes feel like they have to give something back although I don't ask for it and it feels a bit "unreal", if you know what I mean.
Rethinking this message as well, this could be interpreted as falling into the victim role as the manipulator. Damn.
NICOLE TORRANCE you’re not imagining things Nicole! I too was in a seven year relationship that ended in a three month marriage!.... covert, underhanded manipulation! He had me exactly where he wanted me, walking on eggshells too afraid to rock the boat in case he’d leave!... in the end, I could tolerate not a second more! 11months after kicking him out I thank God every day that I am free from repression! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Get out and don’t look back, they truly don’t love you, they’re incapable! x anna x
The response “k” is passive aggressive.
K.
O.o *Are you ok?*
And the word sure
K, sure.
especially when its lowercased and has a period
it's more painful that the one who's manipulating you was your own family.
You're not alone because I been through it too
That's usually the case isnt it 😔
Just take it as a lesson, people are either in your life for: a reason / a season/ or a lifetime💕
i'm in the same situation ... it's the worst
Girl same my little brother tries to all the time. I think he got it from my dad. But it’s so embarrassing when he does it because I know exactly what he’s does and I call him out. I need to talk to my mom about him going to therapy because this breaks my heart that my 5 year old brother is a narcissistic manipulator.
As someone who had manipulative peers growing up, I can definitely tell you that I constantly felt like shit because of them, even for things that weren't my fault, playing the victim card, denying things when I called them out, and threatening to punish me if I called them out any further, you name it.
I felt like I was the problem for years, but your videos have brought awareness to so many issues that I don't think I ever could've grasped on my own, and for that, I am grateful
I'm kind of dealing with this now unfortunately with a family member:
1. she gave me different stories as to why she left her job (we work together i basically got her the job)
2. she told me something about our other relative and basically said she doesn't want this other person tagging along with events with her and this 'friend" of hers because she swears this other relative is jealous of her friend instead of just goin directly to that person and talking with them. then basically in a round about way swore me to secrecy. and it's really bothering me but i don't want to hurt our relative by saying this to her and it would start drama.
3. she slips herself into my planned events with my child using another family member as backdoor to do it without even asking me if that's ok.
does this sound manipulative??
The Gaslighting thing is so true! I thought that they just have bad memory... but thanks for telling me it is a manipulative technique. Now I know that they didn't forget anything, they are just lying... :) This channel is awesome!
Rajatava Kar I thought my mom was dense... Now I believe she has so much against me... 😑
My parents do that too. I once confronted my mother about how she said I have no skills, but she acted as if she didn't remember saying it.
Alyssa Watava That happened to me so many times!
@@shithead593 wanna talk about it?
Alyssa Watava I mean, it's kinda weird for me. Most of the times, the things my dad didn't admit to weren't even that big, so I thought that maybe i just didn't remember the situation correctly or whatever. But that one time he said that ,,me and my opinions mean nothing to him anyway" and it really hurted me. And when I tried to talk about it later, he just denied everything.
I was manipulated so much in childhood n thru the years that I became manipulative in relationships without even knowing it. Thank you for making this vid which helped me to become more self aware. Time to grow.
Same bro
I just figured this out myself. Time to heal and grow. Picked up a book called "Toxic Parents"
Yep
Yea a sucky upbringing made me suck
GingstaWorld
I kinda think I’m manipulative, because I talk behind her back, since she’s always saying she’s ugly and I keep saying she just wants attention, but it’s not really talking behind her back since it’s actually true, when she got a boyfriend, the next day everybody knew because she told everyone, I’m too scared to tell her that, but I’m planning to do it soon.
You guys made me realise so many things. I always thought that I was being apathetic or rude and not aware of whether or not I was hurting people. When in reality, I was only just being manipulated. Thank you so much for sharing this. I really needed this.
NP! That's the thing with manipulation and such. It makes us question ourselves. Glad this video helped in you making the right choices!
Pooja Kameshwaran ...sigh.. And the worst thing is I'm doing it to someone who loves me world without end.... idk how to stop or why I'm even doing it because I really really hate it and always regret it.😞😞
@@khaeliag.gordon8722 I'm glad you at least have the heart to admit it and are willing to change. I agree that it happens unintentionally too. And it could be because of your love for them. So little by little maybe you should respect their boundaries and trust them a bit more. ♥️
Pooja Kameshwaran you kinda hit the nail on the head . . . trust, smh. Is like some times, they are just too simple. They can do so much more in life and with themselves but they shy away from it and I get so upset with them. I do love them, more than anything. Is just that I am angry that they don't see the potential I see in them. I hold them so high, yet they walk with their head hanged down...and because they put others above themselves, they put others above me... sometimes I feel I can never trust them to make the right decision for us, because they are going to make others walk over them.....this is so hard. I honestly have no bad intent, I swear. I can't believe I am struggling with this
@@khaeliag.gordon8722 If you want to change how you are, it's not going to happen in one day. You have to let it slowly evolve. Thanks to the internet, we have tons of articles that help us better ourselves. And strongly believing in the fact that you always mean well and care for them, will make you change yourself positively. Don't lose hope. It will happen soon enough♥️
One of my friends has most of these traits and I can't believe I have been normalising it.
This video was just too relatable and I was able to be more aware of this. I thought she was just stressed so I didn't want to hurt my friend but apparently there's more to it than that. Thank you for making me be aware of these things.
@Moog City Mayor are things better now?
So yes I'm being manipulated
My dad is just like this
Same
Me too. I can't escape though, because my manipulaters are my parents.
My friend... that I really hate it.
Oniscia Bruno same
*Moral of the story, do not trust everyone, even your own "friends". Choose who you associate with wisely, trust your gut instinct before you trust someone's smile and charming demeanor.*
Kasey Lock go eat then
Stop being paranoid. YOU CAN trust people
so, trust only yourself?
*Moral of the story, trust only people who actually is willing to earn up for their mistakes cause in this world perfection doesn't exist. take precaution and recognize the repetitive red flags because if you continue you're only letting that person consume you emotionally and you'll be spoiling them the chances they dont deserve ..love yourself, trust, and love others cause there are people out there that can be family and hear you out. bubbling yourself with lethal confinement is easy but it'll trade to bitterness (^:
I respect your comment and agree with the overall message. Not everyone out there is a bad guy or not to be trusted, but it is wise to always have caution and as you said, "recognize the repetitive red flags"..
One "friend" called me manipulative when i wasnt even being close to manipulative when it actually turns out she was the one being manipulative
Ah, the politics defense.
Distract, then attack?
and that's gaslighting, uno reverse card
When somebody makes assumptions about you it’s usually just a reflection of themselves and has nothing to do with you, have a nice day ya’ll⛅️🦋🌸
Its the classic projection move most narcissists employ. Its immaturity at its worst, really, as many of us while young and covering up hurt feelings have said something along the lines of "I'm not stupid! You are!" But the manipulative narcissists never develop past that.
My ex has all these signs (if not all, majority). Good thing I broke up with her even before the pandemic started. So at least, I only worried about the pandemic, without worrying being inside an abusive relationship. Now I'm happily single and have been enjoying it for two years now. And lesson for others who are in a relationship with an abuser, let go, learn to say no, and don't let them have power over you.
My heart lowkey hurts right now, I am being manipulated rn.
Dont be manipulated
Same. Both my parents manipulate me..
Hahahah
My heart hurts because not only am I an easy victim of manipulation, I'm also guilty of manipulating. It's just less obvious I realised
I am to.....
I love the cute little drawings that go along with these videos. They’re so fitting for giving a cartoon-like description of what the video topic is about.
"Fitting" *gets **1:44** flashbacks*
By #6, I was crying.
I knew something has been wrong in my relationship, so I came to this video. And as soon as #6 flashed across the screen, it’s as if I suddenly realized that they fit perfectly into 8 out of 10 of every one of these.
You have no idea how much this video helped me. Thank you so so much.
Same.
Yeah but I don't think my partner even realises that they are doing it.
@@georgia47259 that’s what I’m thinking too. I wonder if I showed this to him, what he would say
Yessss
Same 😭
The amount of times I found myself apologizing for something that wasn't my fault is embarrassing. But I see now that it was just the result of some really cunning manipulation.
I don't know if anyone will see this, but I feel it needs to be said.
If you were/are in some kind of long-term manipulative relationship or environment, you sometimes can take on those manipulative quality's whether it be for self-preservation or simply a kind of mirroring from so much interaction with said manipulator(s) or environment. It's a normal thing, and doesn't make you a terrible person.
That's why it's important to be just as aware of yourself as other people.
thank you because i was freaking out on whether or not i was a bad person when i realise i only ever do manipulate when im mirroring someone even so i will try my best to keep away from that and instead just remove the manipulator from my life.
Thank you so much. My counselor says “you’re not manipulative” and I’m like 🤨🤨 are you sure? It’s so hard to trust myself after manipulative abuse. Idk if you feel the same?
this is very true in my situation my mother in law displays all on this list but crazy enough my father in law now retired for 5 years has adopted more then half of her traits It's scary we all only see a glimpse of his former cool and kind self on occassion sad but I dont feel sorry for him because he 100% backs her terrible habbits and hurtful personality traits. They have destroyed my relationship in 3 short years of 12yr relationship sincw moving closer after our first child. I have started to see the traits in our daughter as well. Currently working on moving far away
I got manipulated before..
She matched almost every one.
Vanessa Vatev I been manipulated too..
Same here. i was manipulated by 2 of my "best" friends. Now i know how Julius Ceasar felt.
@@vxy357 no you don't, cuz they killed him xD
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
Same here! She matched almost all of these. The friendship ended with me apologizing.
This is very accurate. I used to be in a very toxic long distance relationship. As it turns out, both my ex girlfriend and I were manipulators. Manipulating each others actions on every turn. She was the type to love attention from everyone else which is what made me become jealous and insecure. At the same time, she was kind sweet, gave me so many gifts(we physically met)etc. I was the type to manipulate her with emotions. Becoming very needy, controlling, jealous. She wasn't any different. I couldn't even hangout with my brother without any repercussions. She couldn't hangout with her friends without any repercussions from me. We mirrored each other perfectly. But I have changed. I hope she has too. I learned my lesson and now I feel at peace. But it just goes to show that sometimes, either you mirror your partners actions, or you both are 2 sides of the same coin.
God, this is SO scary because I'm starting to realise that I've been dealing with this type of abuse my whole life. Seriously questioning whether I'm the one to blame. I think blame is usually shared in most cases. I've had thoughts of killing myself since I was a kid. I keep wondering if it's even possible to salvage any type of life worth living. I've had M.S. since 2005 .
Cold Eyes Yes I Had The Same Thing, but i wasn't so on the manipulative side, i did get jealous at points but it was because of my life situations, she had it better than me a bit, but she was the one who manipulated me the most and guilt tripping me and went by a friend and played victim and acused mé of dóing thát, ALOT Of Hell I Went through, also made me fall in love then turned on me just like that now of course i would lose my shit and get hurt then she just turned hostile and malovelent first hand then i get branded the bad piece of shit and she went by a friend of mine to Triangulating, another form of manipulation i learned of here and go off by him how i am this and that and doing this that to her, playing the victim to win him over to her side and ultimately got him to brand me a "someone like that" making me bad like i am such a horrible thing that would abuse and hit her and it went to mind games with me staying away from her cause of her hostility only for her to come and frantically cry by me i leave and ignore her "while she just wants to talk" and so forth and denied the hostile things she spew when i took her on over it, she even made this friend of mine to step on me too one time with shit when i tried crying by him for help for the pain i was going through but at least we still friends, All i know is i didnt and NEVER did this girl ANYTHING she was the one who came into my life and turned it around only to mess it all up again and even told me things about "i must not mess up others 'socalled fun" while in Gods name she was the one messing my life up...
@@johnk6023 i was abused all my life too, abusive family abusive household
@@johnk6023 That's a sign of gaslighting.
@@johnk6023 Life, if you look at it from a better perspective, can bring wonders.
I am ashamed to admit I am guilty of some of these examples 🙁, but not to such an extent or even being aware of what my behaviour was. Now I am aware I know better. These videos are good and educational. It helps me work on myself to be a better person . Thank you
When every one of these signs apply to that one person........
same
@@myseveredwrjsts I hope you find the courage to make them see that you are too beautiful and loved and amazing to be manipulated. You deserve better! Have a great day! ❤
#MyFamily
@Erin Mcsweeney I'm sorry! I really wasn't trying to! I just felt the same way. I had no intention of plagiarism. I'm sorry. ❤❤
@@freeheart306 Oof I hope your situation gets better
1. They constantly make you prove yourself.
2. Communicate passive aggressively
3. Gaslight you
4. They are always just joking.
5. They play the victim card.
6. They kill you with kindness
7. They make your problems feel small
8. They emphasize their calm , cool and collected side.
9. They use emotional blackmail.
10. They take advantage of your trusting & sensitive nature.
There's no law against it until it turns physical😭✅
@@Jackgritty28 because u have no evidence for emotional abuse
@@Jackgritty28 or financial and fraudulent.
Even tho most of these apply to my sister and she makes me hate myself sometimes she told me she loved me because she sends me memes so it’s not toxic lmao
My parents in a nutshell.
sadly, our culture and religious traditions idealize 'putting the needs of others ahead of your own' as a virtue, and not as a warning sign of having low self-worth, codependency, or susceptibility to narcissistic abuse!
Agree with you, be good, but not naive. You gotta be desagreeable and say no sometimes, even if it hurts others, but you always ask yourself "what is the worse my actions can cause?, if the other person feels bad is it my problem or his/hers? "
well the way of the world is not the same as the ways of God. The essence of it is to be a beneficial presence to others. People are going to try to take advantage of you either way you choose to move through this world but at the end of the day what you will be held accountable for is your own actions. Now having said that being beneficial to others does not always mean being a yes man. Jesus wasn't a yes man
Yes. It’s important to put others before yourself. But it’s even more important to recognise when that harms you and it’s seriously the hardest thing ever
Yes everyone always talks about how Jesus says to forgive. Yes he says to forgive but not be a fool. Be wise as serpents but harmless as doves.
It’s been 8 years, 8 Years! Yesterday I had to separate myself from my friend, and I felt terrible but it’s the only way. It’s sad how she makes me feel so worthless but I know that today I’m literally going to try and be friends with her. Honestly I’m tired of being the one that listens, why can’t I have a friend that also allows me to speak. Friends are people you should trust and have fun with, not someone that makes you feel useless and gives you trust issues.
This video make me realise something I never realise until now...I feel like I manipulate my friends...I want to stop it but I don't know how. I think I should stop being friends with them so they won't get hurt. When I ask if they feel manipulated or have a negative feel towards me they say no but I think differently. I need help. I don't know what to do.
I understand that 100%, over the past couple of days I've been doing a lot of self reflection and I've been wondering if I am manipulating people too. It's just gotta be one of those things you have to stop doing and improve yourself and how you interact with others.
I recommend talking to them. Ask them to be honest (i hope you get better ♡)
Same it made me think the same
i have this with my best friend!! i only have point 1. and i asked him 100 times if i'm a toxic friend. answer being "no" i love this guy with all my heart. and i don't wanna hurt him. i'm afraid that i'll hurt his feelings by asking him to be 100% honest, that he'll think i don't trust him. ;; but i don't trust myself.
Exacto, esa es la razón por la que ya no tengo amigos, preferí "protegerlos" de mi 😂
Great!...My Mom is Manipulating Me.
Same 🖐️
Same here. But I'm quite good at adressing it. Making our relationship better.
Same here :'(((
This is why im moving out in january and going to my grandparents place. Even though ill probably lose the money my parents have saved for my college ed. I wouldbt doubt its just another way to hold a debt over me like I own them my life. Not anymore.
Both of my parents are manipulating me.
I was manipulated. They caused me to lose all my friends and then lost interest with me and moved on. I'm only just starting to get back the friends I lost, and I now have severe anxiety and trust issues...
I was manipulated also by tis man...
That's how my bff is being manipulated. Though i will never leave him even though he got turned against me....
Hey..am exactly going through it...my bestf was a manipulater
How did they cause you to lose your friends?
@@ebonyjoseph9489 are you going through it?
Content like this has helped me come to terms with situations where the people who were very close to me in my life were using me and I am currently in therapy working through it. I really appreciate your resources. I don't think I would have sought help if I didn't come across free educational content like this, and it made me realize just how important content like this is to people who don't have as much accessibility. you guys are awesome. 💛
“Manipulators often target insecure, sensitive, and trusting people.”
Me: *looks in mirror and slowly turns around to look at my friend*
Jackie Samayoa 😔
Jackie Samayoa ditto
😂
plot twist: they're not there.
-haha dark humor I know-
😫😫😭
It’s hard to determine if you’re truly being manipulated, because most of the points mentioned are what all people do to some extent.
Sometimes without meaning harm
Not true, if someone shows even 80% of these signs then they are either knowingly a manipulator or unknowingly one.
Michael Guajardo Yeah agreed. I don’t know many people who threaten to kill themselves when someone leaves and it sure as hell isnt normal.
True
Also 100 likes yasss
Well, most people do this to get a social advantage. Even me, my sister, teachers, classmates, or just about anyone who had been manipulated before/forced by their environment to manipulate others to get an advantage.
the gaslighting part and just joking parts really hit me. the person i was friends with did this ALL THE TIME
Pi Emute same and I found out that they manipulated me to be a slave
I was friends with someone who basically fit the entire description of being a manipulator. I unfortunately ended up dating this person for 10 months, but knew him for about 6 years. I wish I had found this video sooner, but such is life. The breaking point for me was when I spent time with other friends (who did also know my now-ex), and realized how great I felt when I was with them, but compared that feeling to how I would feel when I was with my ex. I talked to him about how I felt specifically about that, and he basically told me that my relationships with my friends weren’t meaningful, and that I just wanted something easy. That they weren’t meaningful because I wasn’t telling my friends I loved them and I wasn’t having sex with them. The second he said that, I just knew that that would be the last time I’d see him (especially considering he made my birthday really awful), and it became plain-as-day as to why nobody associated with him.
I’m still really glad I watched this video though. It’s nice to spread awareness to those who may be completely oblivious. It’s a real eye-opener.
That's the thing with manipulation. People often don't realize that they are manipulating others. When two manipulators meet, its hazardous, and they often bring friends into it. I've seen it, and have found myself in similar positions... Although I hate it, bad habits die hard. For those of you out there who find that you yourself are a manipulator in some way, then watch closely to your actions. If you meet the wrong person, you may find yourself in a position of guilt for what you have done. Try not to manipulate others, and talk to your friends. Tell them to tell you if you hurt them, if you do something bad, and try to correct your actions...
One of the wildest things I’ve ever seen is a manipulator manipulate a manipulator. It’s fricking Insane
I'm manipulator too but I'm feeling that I'm being manipulated....the person is screwing my schedule
When you realise that you’ve been manipulated by everyone:
this describes virtually every boss out there. also politicians.
Yes my exact thoughts
Haha 😁 or should I cry 😭😭 omg right on. I'm all alone in the bush
I've never really had friends before but my parent's are sure manipulative
Xavier P
Parents manipulate????
Don’t I know it, my father ORDERED me, when I was 18, to go 200 miles to help him move house 10 days before my A levels started and when I told him about it he said.... well that’s your fault, if you’d done more work it wouldn’t now be a problem. That was 30 years ago and he’s dead now but I remember that every day.
It's horrifying when you find almost every sign in the person you're in love with. Thank you so much, Psych2Go. Always opening my eyes.
Phantom Alma what did you do? Hi. Just a random person:)
@@haranoa0620 hi! Believe it or not, this person changed most of those behaviors, kind of a miracle. Still, the drama hasn't completely disappeared, so stay tuned(?
I do want to clarify that, if anyone told me they have a similar experience, I would tell them to lose touch. It's so different when it's you who should stay strong :(
Ouch ouch ouch
Hi, what did you do to help your situation? I’m in this situation with my husband and I don’t know where to start because I don’t even know how to speak up anymore.
@@gracie912 hello Psych2Go also made a video titled How to deal with manipulative people. You can search it. I'm dealing with a person being manipulative to me right now and I'm glad I watched this video. I wanted to save our relationship, I just want him to see how manipulate he is and hoped for the best he will realize.
A manipulator who throws subtle comments implying they know you better than yourself is the worst I’ve come across. They act like you malfunctioned when things didn’t go their way, exactly by comparing you to their delusional version of you from when you first meet like the ‘good times’. I experienced this from a guy who had nothing more but emotional needs and problems.
I admit that it was obvious to see then, why I didn’t act sooner I do regret and feel so foolish since I didn’t take my intuition seriously just cause I was the nice thoughtful person in the circle
Yep, I need to set boundaries in all my relationships now ☔️ thankful for this channel
I WAS MANIPULATED into watching 2 ads first
ik that happens to me all the time
D Wood hahahahaha
Theres a trick you can do about that; get two interests in youtube then when an ad comes straight up click on the next then as the video is loading get ready for the next!! This is a manipulation strategy that is used with power and people!!! Haha
HAHA 😂
Same
Manipulator: I will kill myself if you leave
Me: *leaves*
Yeah man
Go ahead...do it. :-/
*adds on*
Manipulator: I will kill myself if you leave
Me: *walks out the door* Perish, then
Vladimir Lenin we all die at some pt, & other's choices r *not* r responsibility. 👊
Someone told me that and I said "Do it no balls you wont"
I think I’m being manipulated by who I thought was my best friend😔
I'm sorry, they don't deserve you! I get that it's hard but they WANT you to be in their control, which doesn't mean they're your actual friend. I wish you good luck though !
L&Np aren’t we all
Hitoshi Shinsou thank u
GalaxyClang same and thank u
I feel that so hard. It fucking sucks. Please leave them. It WILL get worse!
Thank you for helping me realize my best friend is manipulating me. And has been for a long time. She’s been gaslighting me and making me feel like the bad guy, and I’m realizing it’s her. I’ve set boundaries before, but she never followed them. I’ve decided to tell her we are not friends anymore.
She played victim, saying how much she cared for me and never wanted anything back. And she said that in a science project we did, she never wanted to do it with me, and she did it with me because she trusted me and that we were friends. She said, “I never meant to hurt you!”. But she did urge me. She always says she never means to do things. But she does do things that hurt me. She’s either super unaware, or super manipulative. It’s both.
If you have strings coming out of your back that's a red flag.
Lol
Haha! Yes. For something more serious as well.
Oh no, I need scissors!
Another one is if you have buttons as eyes.
*Sudden Coraline flashbacks*
My back's been hurting today. Should I be worried?
Insecure, Sensitive, Overly Trusting. Yep that's me
Same XD
yep
same
I’m 2 of those Insecure and overly trusting
Same... I even believe the "I won't do it again" line every time
*target located* jk
I saw this video before ending up in an abusive relationship, with a manipulator.
Remembering this video was what made me start to question his behavior. Thank you for saving me.
saw at 111 likes
Yeah me too...
i saw this video and was confirmed that my long time gf was manipulating me, which i already suspected. i'm currently in the process of manipulating her back for some revenge for a few more months before i leave. this'll be soooo fun ;)
I was accused of guilt tripping and being toxic.
I did freak out and was a bit obsessive because I cared that much. I felt like it was my job to keep them happy. I gone through hell just to make them happy. Though I probably became toxic. And he said I was toxic and he doesn't wanna be my friend anymore. I was kinda unaware what I was doing I was just trying to help.
Rule number three, wear your heart on your cheek
But never on your sleeve, unless you wanna taste defeat
-- _Marina and The Diamonds_
Thanks for the video, I needed this info, I have a few people who just love playing victim
How to be a heartbreaker ❤️
tHIS IS HOW TO BE A HEARTBREAKER
how to wear your heart on your cheek
I’ll admit I’m watching this so I can catch myself. I’ve never meant to manipulate my girlfriend, I love her with all my heart, but she always felt like she ended up apologizing to me for my mistakes. I’m trying to catch these signs now so I can stop and treat her the way she deserves. If you have any suggestions please let me know
Edit: Thank you for all the feedback! I have been doing much better today with my girlfriend and we are learning more and more how to be in a Godly relationship where we both can put one another first, and have started taking better responsibility for our mistakes. When realizing that none of my issues were from a place to control her, but from a place to try and show my empathy. Thank you again for all of this God bless you
Climax
Don't put yourself too much pressure. Been in a five years relationship, girls always play victim card. Careful
Please change because you will kill her from the inside. Everything isn't about you in a relationship and you should freely give forgiveness and be compassionate if she makes mistakes to combat the toxicity
Edith Ge LMFAOOO that solves nothing
I know this is kind of a late response, but hopefully I can help in some way. I'm on my way to getting a psychology degree, and everything I'm about the say is complete speculation of course. Hope this helps!
One of the main things to look out for within your relationship is who compromises more. Manipulators often will force the other individual within a relationship to compromise and apologize to them, rather than taking accountability for their actions. They'll often put on this facade of perfection, and it makes the other person feel as though they are never right. As you've stated, it sounds like your girlfriend apologizes very often, so this sounds like a red flag (once again, this is speculation).
Another thing to consider is what her attachment style is. There are three main types of attachment: preoccupied attachment, avoidant attachment, and secure attachment within any relationship. Preoccupied attachment occurs when an individual feels that they need to be overly cautious and overly affectionate and expressive of their needs in order to have love. This it because when they were younger, they may not have gotten consistent affection from their guardians and/or loved ones, so they learned to become overly attached to people in order to have some morsels of love. Avoidant attachment is the exact opposite. People with an avoidant attachment style tend to run away from the other individual and not show their true feelings in order to preserve their emotional state. People who do this, do this because when they were younger, they may have been taught that their emotions weren't valid or that no one wanted to hear or validate them, so they learned, over time, that expressing their emotions meant hurt, pain, and maybe even abuse in serious cases. Secure attachment is, well, secure. People with secure attachment are right in the middle: they express their needs, while understanding their boundaries. They know what they want, and they understand their emotions are valid, and that its okay to express them. If your girlfriend is apologizing a lot, it may not have to do with you necessarily. It may be that she has a preoccupied attachment style due to childhood trauma. Once again, I'm really speculating here, and I'm not accusing you or your girlfriend of anything. She may feel the need to constantly apologize and compromise in order to keep you around, so discuss that with her.
If you're very concerned, I would highly recommend going to a couples therapist if possible. If you truly have manipulative tendencies, you were probably modeled that from guardian(s) and it's important to receive help. If your girlfriend has a preoccupied attachment style, it's important for you both to work through that to have a truly healthy relationship.
I hope this helps! Once again, I understand this is a late response, but I truly hope you read this and that it helps at least a little bit. As I've said before, this is complete speculation and based on what little I've learned so far for my psychology degree, so please don't take my word for it and, if you can, go to a licensed therapist to discuss these issues.
I used to have a friend like this. At first she was amazing, and fun to be around, but than she changed when we her deeper into the friendship. She started to small things at first, acting like she knew everything and I was just a child. She made me feel like I was always over reacting. At a point she started hitting me. Not to hard, but it still hurt. She acted like it was normal when I told her to stop. We aren’t friends any more.
I know exactly what you are talking about. I got rid of a friend like that and she took a bunch of people from our circle with her. Fuck em man. Not worth it.
I'm living a similar situation, but the gaslighting was so hard in the beginning that I didn't really know if I was being manipulated or started to see things where they doesn't exist. The difference is that I'm already in a (long) relationship. I and my partner are recovering from a bad moment and it happened with her too. It seems to us that people will try to gain advantage over us in our weakness always when they can. This situation is even worse and extremely uncomfortable because of that. Blocked her yesterday (the "friend"). I still don't know exactly what to say to her when I meet her again at college, but is better to take an attitude than react to things when they happen. F*ck.
My cousins did the same thing!
Same
Yeah same man
Thank you for the help . This just proves most of my "friends" are manipulating me , my brother has gaslighted me before , and sadly enough so have most of my friends .
I had never heard of gaslighting before,just realized it was driving me crazy, over apologing and over thinking...
Be careful with that. Im definitely not saying it's not possible or likely and I am saying, avoid labelling what isn't gaslighting, gaslighting, if it's not gaslighting. My ex was told and/or read all this "narcissist" crap and started interpreting all my behaviors based on that, but it was wrong, very wrong. And she caused me a lot of risk at that point. I was harmless and she would barely have a 2 way conversation.
leave me alone...... you trashed me ten years ago I didn't get to see anything since frankly..... leave me alone
Fuck it gets bad, “you don’t remember everything”, “why do you think you know everything” “I KNOW what happened” they can target the smallest detail and made me feel little, dumb and crazy.
There's probably someone out there using this as a tutorial
i don have any idea what to call my account most likely
i don have any idea what to call my account
You gotta play devils advocate with everything, well honed
i don have any idea what to call my account gotta learn something somewhere and wiki is not the answer EVER
... *cough cough* me *cough cough*
@@randomtrooper3150 wtf why?!
How to avoid these things:
1. Just don't have friends or family cut all ties with anybody talk only to random strangers on the internet for 2 days and you're good.
Great advice.. and too true I might add.
Thats been my strategy for the last 20 years. There's a great country song by Merle Haggard called "From Now on, All of My Friends are Gonna Be Strangers". It's a beauty...great lyrics.
Phillip Playz not having friends sucks because you get too lonely after a while
@@Kalanigomz No kidding, I was saying as a joke.
Doesn't work my online friend has been manipulating me for a while
I sent this to a friend who is being manipulated and is having a hard time standing up to the person, I hope this helps them to see the truth 🤞🏻
I started crying when I was listening to the reasons because I’ve been so blinded to not noticed how my toxic friend was most all of these. I’ve been ignoring the red flags but I can’t anymore
Edit: If anyone’s curious on why I made this whole comment was because at that time, i was friends with a really toxic person. She would cut in front of me or in class because she was “stressed” about the homework but would immediately stopped when I offered to do it for her. She also copied my homework. She also flirted with my boyfriend at the time and claimed she didn’t like him but always talked about him holding her hand, grabbing her thigh, etc. When quarantine started, she only really talked about herself and didn’t care what I had to say.
Another edit!:
At the time, one of my other friends confronted her on the things she was doing to me and denied everything. Then we stopped talking completely afterwards. I still see her every now and then but haven’t gone back to how it was. To everyone in the same situation, you got this! Don’t let anyone bring you down ❤️
Yeah same
My only friend in the city i live rn is my cousin...and we were "friends" for 8 years and i only realised how toxic she is when she stopped hanging out with me...im still not over the fact that i isolated myself from everyone to please her and she just dumped me cuz im no use to her anymore...i still have other friends of mine thank god but i thought she was one of those real and good friends..sad thing is that i feel so dumb and stupid for believing her...
And yeah same i was crying so bad like im 17 years old and we have been friends for 8 years...but it will get better...hope you guys find good friends in future and im wishing you all luck❤
@@yourname-nh2tk thank you! Luckily I stopped being friends with that toxic person and I’m feeling a lot better, I’m glad you have other friends ✨💕
This is why I don’t want to make friends
I broke up with my boyfriend a little less than a week ago because I was being told by everyone around me that he was manipulating me into thinking that everything was my fault when in reality it was his actions that caused the disagreement. Eventually, I realized that these accusations were true, so I made the decision for myself to end things despite me still having feelings for him. I decided today that I would look up to see just how much he may have manipulated me aside from the things I had noticed on my own. This video really helped me to realize that I made the best decision, so thanks.
Wow such bravery........I am married to a manipulator of not....I actually started disliking him now
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
I wish I saw this and realized the signs when I was with my ex.
He was so manipulative to me and someone else, as well as emotionally and mentally abusive.
So glad that he's (hopefully) out of our lives.
00:19 They constantly make you prove yourself
00:42 They communicate passive-aggressively
01:13 They gaslight you
01:16 GASLIGHT
01:42 Are always just joking
02:14 They play the victim card
02:41 They kill you with kindness
03:05 They make your problems feel small
04:28 They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature
Sometimes i feel like im left out ....
yep...
yes
Same, but it’s ok, one day a someone won’t make u feel alone
All the time
@@tomurashigaraki--murielgar8349 yeah, fr..
"They communicate passive aggressively"
"They play the victim card"
"They make your problems feel small"
"They use emotional blackmail"
"They take advantage of your trusting and sensitive nature"
I wish I had seen this video before I met my groomer.
me too :(
I hope you are in a better situation and that you have gotten or are getting therapy for what you may have endured.
me too
This is my situation they always guilt trip me when they cheat its never their fault its always the other persons fault always want sex and when I say I'm tired I get hit with all the passive aggressive lines I've said I want to end this relationship I get hit with I'm going to kill myself but the next day it's if I leave you I know your going to kill yourself last night I got called a bitch and was threated I don't need this type of abuse at all I just feel stuck I don't want to be the cause of someonea death but I don't want to be in a relationship that has turned bad
wait do you mean groomer as in dog groomer or groomer as in an adult that groomed you?
1:44
Manipulator:"lol chicken"
Victim:"yeah haha"
Manipulator:"you=chicken lol"
Victim:"oh no"
10/10
LMAO
Yeah, that joke crossed the line 😂
Lmaaaoooo
Very true how they target over sensitive, trusting and insecure people. I can relate to this very much so. Thanks for the video.
This is so true... I've been manipulated by this girl I found through the internet. I thought she was just such a good person etc. She always acted so nice and that... I thought she was helping mental problems and when she "cut all ties with me" I was devastated... I thought I did everything wrong. She always made feel horrible because she also had her mental illnesses. And it was always about hers, even when I finally got a word in about mine she would always one up me. Making me just feel like I was overreacting on my illnesses. And that I was just weak...
We fought a lot... most of the time she would get mad at me for something small and then in the end I was the one apologizing. For saying something mean in the fight. I'd feel horrible for days over that thing.
About 2 months ago, we fought again. This time she was just "done with me" and told me to not text her again and stuff like that. After about 2 days, she texted me again. Apologizing and stuff like that. This time was different for me though. Idk what in me told me to just not text her back... I loved this girl, I'd give up anything for her. Buy for some reason... I didn't text her back. I've been getting constant messages from her daily. About her being sorry, and if we could talk. Every time, I ghosted her.
Since then... I've felt better. I feel better each day, every time I think of her though I still get a small pit in my stomach. Feeling that I'm doing something wrong. But I know it's right...
She was just manipulating me. I even cut off some ties with friends to text her since she was demanding of my attention... And she would show love to me etc. Making me feel loved...
I've only just now gotten back to the friends I've cut off. And have apologized to them a lot.
Manipulation isn't fun...
My ex will say the same things like you. Strange...
Good work, stay strong
lelbot1000: You sound like a very nice man. Real love doesn’t criticize you, hurt you, manipulate you. You will find a wonderful woman if you truly have loving qualities and good intentions.
Everyone manipulates. Most people have not been shown how to ask for their needs to be met in healthy ways, so manipulation is how they do it...plus we are all traumatised to some degree. Manipulation is a way to establish a sense of control. Manipulators are made out to be evil people when most of the time they are just trying to get their needs met in unhealthy ways and don't know how it affects the other person. There's a percentage of sociopathic types who know they are doing it and do it for their own amusement and power. They're the hardest to deal with.
You are one strong man for just ignoring her... well done
Its sad when manpiluators are family......
Yes, it is...and I'm sorry if you're going through your motions yourself. ♥ Please stay safe and know that you can always reach out for help.
It's hard if it's within your family. But if it's your friend, just follow your path, say that you don't have time right now.
Make your life filled with events, it'll make you grow as a person and will make that manipulative person go away on it's own.
There should be some events about professional skills, how to use your knowledge...
Or just start to study some language and whenever he want's to do something you can say that you are occupied with study.
I have the same fate, but that guy is my sisters husband and I just don't talk to him more than enough, we don't live in same house, just the same city. -.-
I don't know how much time I wasted on him, to help him with his ''problems''.
When I need something or just want to talk, his reply is: say what you need, I don't have time.
When there is a problem, they would wait for me 2hrs (time to get to their house by walking) to start doing something that they need. They wont start unless I'm there -.-
That's what I hate the most, it's like they don't have hands or brain...
But when we need to study (or something like that), they can't wait a single sec...
Now I contact them only when it's urgent and my life became more durable :)
My message to you, hang on a little longer until you can move out (if you live with them).
Same, my dad and his family is like this. It got horrible to the point I stopped hanging around them. Sometimes you have to do that and it sucks. :(
@@Gazettelover9 yeah sometimes you have to go no contact.😰
its insane if its your parents (but luckily for me its not)
but its bad with my cousin
Can someone be manipulative while also being manipulated?
yes
yup
GXDDXSS LISA yeah.
Jesus is always the cure. Pray to him
CHAINZ?!?
Just broke up with someone, and I'm crying because I'm able to relate to every single point :'), now he is gaining sympathy from everyone I know and asking me to get back with him, I'm sick of ppl like him, i just wanna stay alone
Stay away from those craps
Yes there not worth it won’t change your worth more
This video describes how manipulative was my ex
Yeah, in retrospect usually we can see things clearly once we no longer interact with them.
did you get a closure tho?
Same. You never see how wrong your relationship is until you're out of it.
Mine was an 8 type who'd swear to kill himself when I don't continue loving him anymore because he was SUFFOCATING.
@@octoberrie562 that's awful! I'm glad you got away from that =\
It’s as if I’m a magnet for these types of people.
Same I suggest looking into stuff about empaths and narcissists. It’s a classic combination that happens where empaths who are generally very sensitive, loyal, and soft-hearted get targeted by narcissists. They are basically magnetized to one another. An empath feels too much and the narcissist has a lack of empathy if not no empathy at all so it starts out almost as innocent curiosity. Both parties see something in the other that’s very alluring but the narcissist has a very sensitive ego so the empath unknowingly sets off triggers just with any flippant comment and the narcissist punishes them in some way. If the abuse was as bad as it was in my case it could cause lasting mental health issues but I have grown tremendously in a short time once I learned that it wasn’t my fault. I wasn’t stupid and wrong about everything. The times I called their bad behavior out I WAS right and should not have apologized. I do mantras now. Tell myself I am worthy of love. I’m not stupid etc. it sounds corny but it helps. I’m getting therapy too which I recommend. Be very careful about being self-deprecating around ANYONE until you know them a little better because the world is full of those people and they will pounce on the opportunity to have a new insecure person whom they can belittle to stroke their egos. I swear I moved into a new place and my landlord I showed a little weakness and she started treating me like complete dirt then I went oh wait fuck that and told her I’m looking for a new place cuz she’s a psychopath next thing I know her husband is begging me not to move out and says he talked to her and she won’t do it again. It might be another manipulation ploy but she hasn’t bothered me since. You can rebuild yourself. Go to the gym, eat healthy, don’t say negative things about yourself, forgive the people who hurt you, move on, and have pride in yourself. I told my bullies no mad and lost the only 2 friends I had but I instantly felt transformed. It’s still work but yeah sorry for long message.
I feel like that too, I really feel like that. But hey in the end being a magnet to those types of people just means you can spot them out quicker each time
Have you heard of the human magnet syndrome?
Amen, I feel the same way
I'm going to be honest here..I did half of these things to my friends. I feel really bad. I probably the first 3-4. But the rest is not me, I actully care about my friends and always try to help them. I will try to change. Thank you
i do them all for fun
Amadour Lopez I’m sorry that you seem to have very bad experiences with Christians. Christians are NOT supposed to that. We Christians are supposed to just plant the seed of the idea of Jesus and that is it. No forcing or anything. Those people who shove the Bible in other’s faces are not true Christians. They just make the real ones look awful. They get everybody to hate the TRUE Christians.
We all are selfish, it's human and it's natural. It's only those who realize that they have this problem and try to fix them that succeed in life.
Sadism and selfishness isn't okay just because you think you deserve no guilt
Subway SpeedPainter So cool you recognize tat.
A couple months ago I realized I've been in a toxic friendship for 10 years...we meet in grade school, and while others tried to tell me she wasn't any good for me, or that she was manipulating me I always jumped right to her defense. Watching this is kinda hard, recognizing her having done most of these things to me
when you get manipulated by your family
-_-'
I feel you
Cool name
feel ya, its hard to set boundaries with family members, when all minor tries to find a solution dont work, i guess its distance for you. I personally got a shitty family too and i just moved away and broke up with that part of my life. Unless I see that their behavior wont stop, i wont talk to them, dont need negativity in my life, neither do you.
Yep
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
This video made me Realize I'm getting manipulated by my best friend....
Jai vxr the bible says that there are people who progressed onwards as someone was lowly suffering from a cruel wicked blow to reality.
Jai vxr same
Same
Same here
Better late than never. Ditch the bitch! ;)
"You find yourself apologising all the time."
I find this sadly true. I'm trying to recall a certain friend EVER telling me 'sorry'.
shit same .
Been through this still going through this! I’m so Tired OF THIS!!💔💔💔😭😢😔😞😡😠
I recently got out of a toxic and incredibly manipulative group of friends, however this isn't the first time I have tried to leave, I have tried to separate myself from them for some time now, but one way or another, I got pulled right back in. To be honest, it kinda felt like i was betraying them. I would find myself thinking /sure, there are some bad parts, but they were there for you!/ Is that even normal?! I feel like they slowly turned me into them, looking back, at one point, I was pretty toxic too! When I first met them, I was young and naive. Easily manipulated. Now that I'm finally out of it, I am completely different. Some of these changes I /did/ make on my own, but should I feel ashamed and regretful about them??
HOLY BUTTS. That's the same way I am! My friends will give me small things, like answers to homework problems, and then when I realized they were toxic and I tried to leave, I felt bad because I always love to return favors and make people feel loved. _They gave you things, things they worked for and you didn't,_ is what I would tell myself. _You should return the favor before you go, or they'll feel you're ungrateful._
@@dearfauxpas OMG this is me help
I had a similar “friend” and it completely sucks (it still sucks) any time i had a problem or have had a crappy day she would bring up her parents divorce that happened when she was three so i felt bad so i never left (but also she was scary) and now that i found a great friends everyone asks me why i don’t hang out with her.
I left a whole group of friends who are kinda trouble makers and possibly the same. This is why I'm a mute.
(Instead of using /insert word here,/ you can put these: _ before and after what you say, like this: _ manipulative _ =without spaces, _manipulative_ )
I was on the verge of being manipulated once. He would always get mad at me whenever I was doing anything without him or if I prioritised my own time, he wouldn't talk to me unless I apologised for doing literally nothing and he always made fun of me for one thing or the other, whilst also complaining to me about being bullied when he was younger, and even insulted me behind my back to my friend.
I got fed up and simply said, "Not anymore, sucker!" and blocked him. Perhaps it was simpler for me, but… Jeez I got off easy.
psykoberry you are lucky, I got manipulated and lost money to it, luckily I got out of it over time. I’m glad you didn’t get manipulated and did the right thing! ❤️
can manipulators be clueless about them being manipulative
I think they can. Manipulation can be intentional or unintentional. The most dangerous kinds are the ones who know exactly what they're doing and they continue to do it. But, those who reflect on their actions do the most growing.
I feel horrible because after this video I need to apologize to everyone I know I really feel like a shit friend
I have schizophrenia, which causes me to have multiple voices in my head, and two of the voices were manipulators, and the others weren’t, so yes.
@@beanie9918 preach...
말로우마쉬 manipulator can be manipulated by other manipulator.
It's painful to be in a manipulative relationship 😣
This sounds like my parents...
wow that's I'm sad Relateable too
Lol that's true XD
@@Bubby2509 thats the facts
Same but only my birthmother
0of Yes indeed Dat boi
Wow, my ex-husband scored a 9 out of 10. I am so glad to be out of that relationship.
You go girl!
Same
So is he
_oof_
You do know God hates divorce
Oh... well.... I'm a manipulator and I'm being manipulated
*NICE-*
Same
Lmaooooo 😂😂
@@hqx479 guess I'm not lol
Me too. I kinda hate myself for being like that but idk if I could live through my current situation otherwise. My father is one as well and so was his father.
Same
I have this friend, and one day I invited her over, and I went to the bathroom and when I came back she was going through my freakin search history, and she found an "Are my friends toxic quiz" I took about a week ago. She acted super offended, and I was trying to calm her down by telling her that the results were negative, (which actually wasn't the case) Anyways, she told everyone about it, and how I made her cry, acting like she was the victim. To this day, she still says stuff like, "remember that time you made me cry? How do you feel about that, hm?" In front of people, and I go into full guilt-mode, and when I DON'T show her that I'm guilty, she acts all annoyed and cold at me.
I have finally come to realize what's been going on, and I am working on setting boundaries.
This video was such great help to me!
Add:
They have no concept of Regret or Gratitude. Their apologies mean nothing.
sometimes the apologise without any meaning
and other times the will deny or blame you or minimize damage
I feel no one deserves to be in a relationship with a narcissist they are terrible people that feel entitled thank God for my friend who referred me to an hacker and i was able to hack my narcissist partner's phone, all i did was to share his phone number with (geniustracker) without touching his phone and see all the proofs i needed for a divorce and even terrible things they had planned contact John to help he is a genius. You can text/call +1 (415) 323-6758 or reach him on WhatsApp +1 (724) 330-3252 and also write to Via Gmail (geniustracker701) and don't forget to thank me later
They apologize to maintain the push and pull and tit for tat of the relationship.
Omg that’s so true
Whenever I try to bring up an issue or concern (ex: his excessive sugar intake), my ex would constantly say “you don’t love me if you don’t accept me”. If we fight, he would always say “do you still love me?” instead of explaining or apologizing.
What's wrong with sugar intake?
@@akhtaruzzamanjoy8524 He's probably thick
That just sounds insecure to me
Its sad when your dad fits this description.
Same
Yup mine does fully
My dad fits most of these too. I bet he’s doing it intentionally, because every time I or another family member has confronted him about it, he says he’s going to change but he doesn’t.
My mom fits it
Ya, mine too. It's such a hard thing to realize, so no one ever really cares and there is no obvious excuse to get out. I'm just waiting 'til the day I turn 18.
It's so sad that this happened to me without fully realizing the situation. I wish my bestfriend didn't do this, I was honest and he knew that I had trust issues even before. Regardless, he still did what he did and it hurt me. Manipulation sucks, I'm happy I'm out of that friendship and I can continue to be myself and still be kind with others but it's getting harder for me to form deeper bonds because I'm scared it might happen again.
Holy crap my “friend” just seriously gaslighted me a week ago when I was calling her out for bullying me
yeah females are good at it. They practice that shit in school and start at a very young age.
iFazer8 AKA The Doctor males too 🙃 i have experienced both girls and guys to be very manipulative.
@@ifazer8akathedoctor275 ok incel
iFazer8 AKA The Doctor r/incels
souxie ovo iMm oFfEnDeeDd
I was raised by a woman exactly like all of these and it set me up on a pattern of being treated this way by others my entire life . I am finally starting to heal from it thanks for sharing very helpful!
i was being manipulated the whole time the whole year. it ruined me and my feelings
Watch it it will make you feel better ua-cam.com/video/qyYHWkVWQ4o/v-deo.html
Muryam Naveed I’m going thru the same thing right now. And even worse, this was my first ever relationship.
Lol just a year- 😭
Oop-
Same i feel your pain it is very hard and they make us feel self doubtful
I'm just a puppet in their theater......
a lab rat.....