mens obsession with humbling women [“i had to humble her”]
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- Опубліковано 7 лют 2025
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In this episode, Elle discusses men's tendency to "humble" women, which she identifies as a projection of their own insecurities. She explores various scenarios and explains how this behavior is aimed at lowering women's self-esteem and standards. Elle also delves into the reasons behind this behavior, stressing the importance of avoiding people who exhibit these negative traits. She concludes by encouraging listeners to surround themselves with supportive and secure individuals, highlighting the importance of self-worth and self-respect.
![women gatekeep relationships… not men [groom’s gross vows]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/NHgDIXnVb-8/mqdefault.jpg)
![women gatekeep relationships… not men [groom’s gross vows]](/img/tr.png)
"Not all men."
"You're right. Gomez Addams would never treat anyone this way."
Yes
That is why I always say that I won’t marry until I find a Gomez Addams 😂 Goated comment ❤ Thank you, from me, another Addams family stan
Yeees
@@vanessaprincesssa He truly set the bar and then kept raising it.🖤 Because, it's not just how he is with Morticia, it's how he is towards his family, his friends, neighbors, and strangers. A secure man is a kind man.
For me it's my anime husbando Nanami Kento.
I used to work with a young woman who was exceptionally beautiful, and men would neg her all the time. Being older, I recognized this for what it was and took pride in calling them out on it.
I literally never even realized that when we’re doing this to me when I was younger what’s the point of like humbling anyone
Pretty privilege isn't a privilege if you're a woman
The true reason those guys hate drunk girls is because drunk girls compliment each other. Drunk girls will be sincerely uplifting in such a blunt way. Just yelling at each other "No you are gorgeous and your ass is perfect as it is!".
@@MissMoontree I’ll try to Compliment man more I have been I just don’t wanna look thirsty on my birthday. I was complementing men and women, and I think it looks like I was throwing myself at this man, but I was just trying to heal his inner child. I will I was holding his face and calling you handsome, but I was doing that all the girls to holding their faces and Coalling them beautiful
@@Alicia-vq8jgyou can't 'heal' anyone other than you and it's not your job either
The one thing I hate hearing is guys say "I usually don't like or date black women but you're gorgeous to be a black girl"
Ick the racism 🤢🤢
This
this is why i never want to be someones "first black girl" bc were the backhanded remarks necessary on the first date??
"I don't care. Just take your pants off," would quickly shut him up. You have to shock them into silence, while calling their bluff. All the while, staring them down, daring them to reply. Have your mace in your hand in your pocket. Bullies only respond to a taste of their own medicine.
I can’t count how many times I’ve heard this or any insult following “you’re pretty, but…” especially from narcissists
I used to pity insecure people. With time I noticed that they are actually REALLY DANGEROUS. Stay away from them at all costs.
This!
Absolutely. Truer words have never been said.
Their insecurity makes them unhappy with themselves which in return makes them jealous and that makes them mean and petty
Fr is better not engage
@@mitzara25 most of them project their issues on you!, they’re not happy with themselves and they don’t want you to be happy with yourself so they just spin around trying to make everything “wrong” with them is your fault like you’ve caused it.
The comments i get are "you're to confident". This is after years of abuse and finding my voice by working on myself. I will never date a rude and jealous man again
❤
Yes..the "arrogance" tag... no babe, that's confidence.
We're proud of you ❤
He's just insecure. You go gurl 👏
It's funny (not really, ironically I suppose) because the inverse if a guys confident it's seen as a good thing. Confident women often equals vain to them. Definitely an insecurity.
Reminds me of 8th grade, when a boy asked me out. It first the first time I’d ever been asked out to my face, so I turned bright red. I politely turned him down, mostly because I didn’t know him super well except from some church events. He took it well at first, but within the next month said, “you have a mustache,” to me in front of some guys (I have slightly darker upper lip hair). I simply said, “so you asked out a girl with a mustache.” And he had no words. I sometimes wonder if he thought my initial bashfulness meant that I had no self esteem.
It’s so embarrassing when they pull that bs. I have curly hair and there was this dude who I was kinda friends with (before he started being a weirdo freak and showing his true colors) he like had a crush on me and kept of nagging me about it even tho I kept rejecting him. And one time he was like “Well your hair looks like shit anyway” and then I was like “well you didn’t feel that way when you kept trying to get with me” and he just didn’t say anything cuz he knows that’s true. It’s so stupid and embarrassing for them and I just can’t take it seriously
He was an 8th grade boy. He was probably just a moody teen.
@@monkeking_2144 not the 'boys will be boys' argument
Did he say that with the full intention to sound mean? Not trying to disprove your words, but if he just pointed it out maybe he was just very honest.
I'm a girl, and when I was younger I was painfully honest, even when I never intended to harm others. A lot of times I would just point out people's characteristics as an observation with no real emotion, you know, thinking out loud, not even seeing that trait as negative. Later, in my early teens, was when I learned to tone down the honesty.
Again, not wanting to disprove anything as this is your experiencie, but kids often lack tact without meaning to. Specially if they're autistic.
so what do you want boys to be? Not boys? That really doesn't make any sense because I'm 99.999999994% sure you wouldn't like it if someone told your entire gender that they have to change just because you don't
like it.@@ArmelSight
Compliments hit different from other women because we know they aren’t trying to get something from us and actually mean them.
True 💯
Compliments from older ladies are the best!
And women have better aesthetic sense and expect more in terms of appearence as they are not blind due to lust. Female compliment, when given outside friends group (which is also fake), is the most valuable complement. Would also include kids in general.
@@Elisabetta886women like you are so appreciated! Some of my favorite people in my life are older women
This! I literally just said this 💯💯
I think the insulting as a love language only applies between men. When they do it to women, it’s a very deliberate attempt to diminish their confidence and have easier access to them. If a man negs you or he does the “compliment/insult” combo, run 🏃♀️
Honestly, I don't think it even applies to them either, they just convinced themselves that it does so they don't have to admit that they are not as stoic as they believe. This is considering how bad they are at keeping or even making healthy deep relationships with their friends (no wonder they are lonely, ahem)
@@annierminxExactly. No human likes to be insulted because our brains literally cannot differentiate between a “joke” and truth. This is why jealous/insecure individuals insult people through jokes. They have plausible deniability while still getting the point across.
@@holographicwingTHAT part!
Guy's CAN'T receive that same energy!
They'll ALWAYS try to one up you ....
Until it gets just sad...
Lost all semblance of cleverness, maturity or a vocabulary....
it devolves into juvenile petty embarrassment and resentment in the blink of an eye!
@@TK-cg4ks where do you get our brains literally cannot differentiate a joke from the truth when that's not true at all. plenty of people can tell when someone is jokingly jabbing ta them vs being serious
Yep, I give their energy back and they get sad then angry like ?
Of course he is insecure he is short and not very physically attractive. So proud of these girls for showing solidarity
Of course they showed solidarity. His insults and mind games don't mean anything because after the interview, they'll leave together and he'll be alone, again.
@@dangerzone5828 so what? It's his duty not to be insecure. Do you think every woman fits traditional beauty standards? But they don't do dumb shit like this
I've seen and heard of some short guys genuinely be nice or at least chill bc it's them being themselves rather than trying to compensate for height. Those same short guys also weren't bad-looking. On behalf of not just short guys but short people overall, we do not claim that mf.
@@xletragedyx Really? Is this the only UA-cam channel you watch?
@@twentyonetortas5921 I agree as a 5'2 mf 🙌
no cause I always notice this online how come when a man says something they hype him up but whenever a woman says the exact same thing they start hating 😭
I know it’s often used as a joke. But I think of when people say “Women ☕️”.
Like okay fine. Someone can give out the most intelligent and reasonable response, and these annoying people all they can see is the gender of someone. And they have such low attention spans, that one aspect is the only thing they can focus on.
✨ Sexism✨
exactly!!
We should be used to the double standards by now shouldn't we?
Like how when a man is a single dad raising his kids, he's praised, some women fawn all over him, he's treated like he's amazing for raising his OWN DAMN CHILDREN. The bare minimum job of any parent. And their mother is judged to be a monster for not raising her kids.
But when a woman is a single mother, she's treated with distain. She's the problem, not the scumbag who walked out on his family. Whatever the situation it's always the woman who's at fault. And men get treated like they're incredible for doing the most basic of things.
When my auntie was in the hospital for 2 weeks my uncle had to take care of the kids and he had numerous women dropping by (family, friends, older neighbours) bringing home made meals to 'help' him through his ordeal of having to parent his children on his own for a couple of weeks.
When he went away for work for 2 months (which he did occasionally) leaving my auntie with the kids, how many people do you think showed up to bring them meals etc while they 'coped' without him for months? Yeah, none. It was just expected, rightly so, that that's her duty, to take care of her own kids. But when men have to do it, they're incredible and deserve praise and lots of extra help. The double standards are sickening.
RIGHTTT???
I remember sitting on a bench, in a park, with a guy I had a date with.
He was making remarks on my teeth and how they strange they were in his opinion.
Three young women (angels!) came up to me to tell me how beautiful I looked that day.
He was SO jealous of the compliment I received 🤣.
❤😂❤fantastic!!!
@@elenafetter9690it was so fantastic haha. I don’t know if they overheard what he was saying and wanted to cheer me up, but I thought it was almost divine timing haha. And the look on his face was hilarious
God sent those women as angels 😇
This comment finally made me get it - thank you! I remember getting ready for a date one time and thinking “I want to make myself look as beautiful as I possibly can” so I put sooooo much effort into making my hair/makeup/outfit look flawless, and when I looked in the mirror before I left, I thought I looked absolutely perfect. But then he shows up outside, I get in his car and the first thing he says (no hello or nothing smh) is “you have a nose hair sticking out” 😂 girl when I tell you I wanted to hop right out that car at that moment lmao
@@sunrope77Girl I am so sorry you put up with such a loser... You deserve the best and no less ❤
About the "you have a deep voice" comment that is meant to destabilize her by bringing up something he thinks could be an insecurity of hers, it's such a classic move from a lot of guys ! So glad you pointed it out.
When this happens, I usually respond with a joyful "Omg thank you!" As if they paid me a genuine compliment :) that usually throws them off.
Because the truth is there's nothing wrong with deep voices, hairy legs, big jewelry, bold clothing or unusual hair colors.
Femininity is what you want it to be.
They're just jealous because they're afraid to allow themselves this type creativity.
THIS! You are so correct and that is genius stuff to act like their insult was a compliment and take it that way! It takes their little brains for a spin 😂
On the same topic - One time my ex invited me to get coffee with him on his lunch break. I already had things to do in the area so I said - sure.
I went there looking like REVENGE 😁😌😈😈 - SHORT skirt and all. Ahh, the look on his face! Gave him away!! I’ll never forget it, likee, his mouth actually FLEW OPEN and his eyes widened 😁😁
Then… I sit on the chair opposite him and the FIRST thing this mf-er says is: “You look like you’ve been eating more lately”
… LIKE BRUH you are seriously tryna tell me that I gained weight after I SAW you open your mouth in surprise at my outfit 😂😂😂 I laugh about it to this day, he was insecure as hell
Ex-bf used to talk shit about me wanting tattoos. I wanted to get sleeves but he said they were ugly. Why was he looking at Suicide Girl models? Why was the girl he cheated on me with covered in tattoos, including sleeves?
"You have a deep voice lol".
Me : "Atleast one of us sounds like a man" That's what I used to say as a woman with deep voice.
@@furballrage595 Damn! Don't mind me stealing that hehe ^^
They always proceed with "it wasn't a compliment"
Then i say "oh so you are trying to insult me"
That's when they finally shut up
Attacking strangers in the street with mental abuse! What a swell guy!
🎉
Girls stop being nice to men who try to humble you. Please don't engage. They don't deserve your energy. Please invest in someone who treats you decently
not decently it should be treat you properly respectfully kindly
That's always my advice. Literally do not say one word to them. Just look away and continue doing what you're doing. It'll piss them off so much. Like don't respond to them after that no matter what they say.
I’m pretty sure if women know. They would.
@@Egh0127 exactly
Not decently but amazing
My (soon to be) ex-husband (divorce is a long process) once told me that a mans confidence is tied to how much sex he gets, either from as many women as possible or as much from one as possible. It doesnt matter if all other parts of his life are great, if he doesnt get regular sex he feels bad about himself. And I responded with "so your confidence comes from how much you can get (or take) from others? Not by your own accomplishments or merits but by how much you can milk a service out of someone else." It was an eye opener, because it meant that being the mother and main caretaker of his child, making equal money to him so we could live a comfy life (all while working from home), keeping the house clean and making homemade dinners every day, didnt matter. If he didnt get sex, then I was not a valued part of his life, which meant that he "couldnt" enjoy talking to me or being a family with me if he wasnt having regular sex with me (our 1.5 year old slept in our bed most of the time and woke up a lot at night so he chose to sleep in the guest room so he didnt get disturbed at night). That, plus him bragging to others that he caught me when I had no self esteem... it really made me realize that my life is better in my own hands only.
Yeesh, you dodged a bullet there. He sounds like a nightmare 😬
You go girl
they see us as “getting something” or “as an achievement” while also putting us down , using us etc it’s very contradicting & horrible lol
🫂 🫂 🫂 im so sorry girl. Good on you for moving on from toxicity
@reagan13579 did get away from him?
A guy told me " u looked good today, but your feet looked big" i knew from that remark that i wasnt gonna give him a second date. These men are ridiculous. We have access to too much information now, like this channel! We are learning!
Ladies, see the red flags and walk away!
🎯
Why do they say shit like this? This is just MEAN. They HATE us.
@@moonlightsky4840they want us to hate OURSELVES so we never feel like we deserve better than their asses 🙄
A good reason why I prefer women. So far, none of my girlfriends have treated me this way. The more I read comments like this, the harder it gets to not absolutely resent the other half of the population for the god awful way they treat women.
@@WolfSpirit_777I'm bi but men terrify me at this point
there was this tiktok of a conventionally attractive man asking this woman to rate him 0-10, she said like 5 or smth because she had a boyfriend and he wasnt her type... good lord did the men go insane on twitter that day, seems women arent allowed to humble "hot" men back
And guess what if this woman complimented this guy despite having a boyfriend they would tell she's for the streets
She quite literally said it was because she had a boyfriend. Please go make a podcast crying about it.
@@jackier8142 and?? She also said that he wasn't her type. Y'all want to shame women so badly ewww lol
@@scary5455 he wasnt attractive to me but my opinion isnt the be-all end-all so i said conventionally like clearly youre attracted to him
Why would you want anyone to rate you? What value does it bring to your life? It just feeds you ego in a very nasty way
"I like this one right here." He said that as if she was an object.
I was about to say.
Like he's shopping for a couch...
right? like he's trying to pick out which car he wants off the lot. so gross
Because that’s how he sees women
@kogo8107 Agree.
I don't think men understand how much we value women's compliments over theirs...
I will tear up from a kind compliment from a woman, but a man? I'm just wondering wtf he's trying to get from me. Nice dress?? Wtf do you know about dresses?
Exactly!
Speak for yourself, personally I prefer compliments from my male friends
If my male friends tell me, I believe them. If a stranger does, like I know I look good, I don't need you to tell me. I accept/tolerate compliments from strangers if they feel genuine, though. I like to tell people they look nice, but with guys my age or slightly older I think thrice before I do that.
@@byDEVITA I mean there your friends. But lets be honest here, most people are straight. Thus if a compliment is coming from a stranger, and of the opposite sex, its going to be seen as flirting.
@@byDEVITAAnd I’m sure they value you as much as you clearly value them (sarcasm).
Negging is a way to manipulate and control. The man will flip flop seamlessly between insults and compliments. The truly gifted narcissist will combine both into what experts call Push Me Pull Me comment. It pulls the listener off guard. It's intentional and evil and very effective at destroying a person's self esteem. So glad for this video.
Sounds like intermittent reinforcement, which is a pattern of psychological and emotional abuse.
@@letym2271definitely Abusive and will turn Physical. walk away while to ou have the chance and don't engage. Also walk inbthe direction to a the nearest precinct you see how quickly the leave.
This is a tactic taught by PUA for the past 30 years - they think this makes them a player.
Sounds like ryan reynolds true personality. I hope people will finally wake up to the fact that he's not funny
Sounds like normal behaviour, where people without any evil intent can tell you that you are beautiful and then still criticize something about you. But sure: label it and show use you paranoid mind so we can get a good look at what narcissist women do.
I am so glad to hear another woman talk about how mean men are to each other because women act like being around men is so much better. I have been around a lot of different groups of men and they really do insult and make fun of each other constantly and they're either expected to insult them back or shut up, and if they say they have a problem with it, they're called a girl and made fun of even more. I don't know what the reason behind it is either but its definitely not my vibe either. I prefer hanging around women for that reason.
Exactly people especially pick mes love to say "girls are too much drama boys are better to hang out with" but boys are so mf mean to each other I remember one time in class this boy started roasting his friend about his hair.
The whole class turned around to look at him you could tell he was pretty embarrassed and just replied back with "oh shut up"
Yup same. And they keep whining about not getting compliments or no one caring about them on their status. Or the way they just easily fall for women who just smiled at them or treated them nicely
@@Genorgin lol pick mes LOVE being insulted. This pick me girl in my class has a bf and he treats her so badly but she would rather hate on other women he likes than leaving him. He literally insults her even when she sometimes cooks for him lunch ( they both are 18 like wth) he can't even appreciate her and also the "boys" she gets along with, usually make fun of her or are nice to her to get "s_x"
Only pick me women say 'I prefer male friends. Women are drama,'. Meanwhile, males have started all the major wars and life-ending drama for the past several thousand years.
Its the same men who say "women compliment each other so they're fake" then cry "men don't get complimented" bro i wonder why.
Then they'd somehow put the blame on women and feminism lol
Honestly, after what he said to the girl dressed in black, if I was the princess, I wouldn’t have spun around for him. He was so mean.
"i see what you're trying to do," a royal wave, and an exit stage left would have been hilarious.
Agreed. You insult or ignore my friend(s) and the interaction is over.
I know right? I felt so bad for her. He literally called her ugly in her face.
@@temposhop8739💯
Ugh, what a goon. They should have said, gotta go, bye!
It's always let me "humble her" and never "wow let me strive for more" imagine being too lazy to do the work but also getting mad at people who aren't... yikes couldn't be me.
Men are scared that women are so powerful right now and we can make money just with our pics
"All these men are just gay" is a fun assumption and all, but even if you're not attracted to women it's really not an excuse to treat us like shit. I don't care if you don't swing my way, I'm still a person worthy of respect
But many are secretly gay, they have families and what not... its just so funny, how they cant be authentic and then accuse you of being so... the irony of it all... 😂
But i don't see wome respect men in genral .they respect special group of men.not all men.
Nah, actually most gay men have been the most positive people in my life so it's not that either, it's just straight dudebros' insecurity against women.
No you are not. No one owes you respect. Many of us don't even get any respect. We get neglected, overlooked and mistreated on the daily.
You aren't anything but another lone figure. Its sad but true.
@@a-sheep-of-christ I hope typing that I’m not worthy of respect made you happy because it doesn’t seem like anything else has for the last decade, holy
Men need to stop trying to “teach” women how to be women…. We made yall!
🔥🎯
Loooll this part 👆🏽they forgot where they came from
I love it!
@@LemanRussxyeah, the guy nuts and the woman develops the baby and does the rest of the work for 9 months, then puts in the work of taking the formed baby out of her poonany
@danwatson171 Minimizing women's labor and creation is a red flag. Comparing busting to being an author is just silly. Please get out. This is a women only space.
Honestly the first time this happened to me was when I was taking a class and this guy who was twice my age criticized my dyed hair. The comment was incredibly passive aggressive and so uncalled for that I really didn't know how to react. Turns out he secretly hated me because I was better than him at school 😭 so he decided to criticize my hair I guess? Lmao he was so insecure. I hate men like that.
Seriously though! Men like this need therapy.
I knew an insecure guy who was obsessed with me. He would talk good and bad about me with his friends and I never knew why he was like that. I remember I ghosted him when he rudely asked me out of nowhere if I was jealous of my female friend’s new job, I simply answered him that I was happy for her because I was lol it wasn’t a competition between us. But then he went around spitting his poison and then that female friend never spoke to me again. He had a girlfriend (which he treated like trash btw) but was incredibly obsessed with me, it has been the weirdest experience ever. Thankfully I cut his lame ass off 🚮
Your comment made me realize something... there are 2 guys in my year that do this to most of the female students in our field of study. Myself and my 3 closest (female) friends have always hated them.
These guys are only nice to a girl each is close to in our year (tbh the girls they're close to are angels and very smart).
They're not just mean to us [female students] but they're also disrespectful to our female Professors and Engineers. They are disrespectful/mean in a way that is not obvious to someone who is looking from the outside.
Sorry for the long comment (and possibly bad English). I had to get this out of my system. I'm glad I'm learning this early in life!
Yeah I know what's that's like it like out scoring the boss at work it's interesting to watch there reactions if a woman out performs them in the work field that's a huge blow to there ego if your better at the job then they are so they usually become passive aggressive and jealous of you it's like there congratulating you while looking for mistakes in your work at the same time.
it's mostly attention they want and boss men always mean the exact opposite of what they tell you. Like the other night he said, "don't let me catch you re facing the shelf!!"
So I waited till the orders were totally done and he clocked out and I went over there to re face the seasonal section for an hour because it's the holidays and people can't find stuff an organized shelf will save your store from going out of business too.
@@CutiePatutie_SmookiePookieBear facts.
girl please PLEASE talk about women hating each other for male validation oh my god plssssss
It’s always the not so good looking people hating conventionally attractive people for validation from personal experience
If you haven’t seen it yet, a few videos ago Elle made a video about the two girls on TikTok where they were besties but one of them got a boyfriend and then the other one tried to steal the boyfriend.
I think the video is called - How to react when someone is stealing your man - or something like that.
And there Elle talks about this topic a little bit - how the two girls started hating each other because of a man and how it was unfortunate and what to do about it.
I hope this helps! ❤
@@vanessaprincesssa yes it does tysm!!!
she has made videos on it already
@@simplememe70 You are welcome bestie 🩷🫶🏼
I once mentioned to a man that the more I grew up the more I became aware at what rate sexism is still present even in today’s society and how it actually affects women and girls. He replied “well yeah true, men also face discrimination and are being told to act more manly.” Which is true, however it just rubbed me the wrong way that he changed the subject quickly. Its like when you’re communicating a problem you have and they immediately go “well yeah but i also have a problem”. I am more than willing to help other people and talk about their issues and be understanding of their own struggles which stray apart from mine, I do think however that there’s a time and place for everything.
That's a form of dismissal and or narcissism basically the pathetic me me me bs nobody asked for.
Another thing I hate is that they NEVER TRY TO FIX THE PROBLEM. Women around the world are literally getting killed to have rights and these guys won’t even think about being the arbiter of change. I just wanna ask “yeah, and what are you doing about that?”
@@endiecutie06
Well, I have seen men who pride over these things for various reasons. Some men count those things as problems but not the problems that's needed to be fixed. Those are the problems that they wore as badge of honor of being a man.
Other men simply act like they can't do it because no one else is doing and they don't want to be the victim aka basically being a coward/are scared.
My only reaction to this mess is, men are divided amongst themselves. They gotta deal with their "buddies" first and stand up and speak out at other occasions, NOT ONLY when women is standing up for her own problems. It will work slowly but then they need to be genuine about their intentions and actions.
and it’s literally NEVER out of good faith or anything. It’s just dismissal of women’s issues.
Just seeing all the vids in recommendations on the right part of the screen is insane : "women get humbled for 25 min " feminist get put back to her place" "man humble women with facts" "man destroys feminist in 10 points" and so on... and those videos have millions of views !! Misogyny is definitely a great marketing trick...
Yeah but at the end we still "choose"
I don't date men who does not respect the rest of my gender
That is a big red flag for me
When i heard something i dont find right, i automatically lose interest.
The type of people that watch those videos are the type to stay TF away from. They will only bring misery to ya.
@LynaLoop
You conveniently forget that Misandry precedes misogynistic behaviour. we know that studies have proven that low status and misogyny are related, and that many low status men report feeling neglected and disenfranchised.
It is natural to hate those that hated you int he first place. Why you think the bible has so many exhortations on NOT retaliating? Because it is human nature.
@@a-sheep-of-christon top of that.
Misandry doesn’t even EXISTS.
Yv_edits explained it better than I EVER could you should watch that video. It’s great.
@@a-sheep-of-christ “its natural to hate those that hated you in the firts place” What a hypocritical line and let me point out your own double standard. If it's okay for you that a man hates ALL women for not having had a good partner and that has nothing to do with being immature and exaggeratedly extremist for resenting half the population for it; I imagine that the inverted situation should also be okay, at least for you since you think "it's natural".
What if a woman with bad experiences with the men she loved decides that ALL men are bad and hates them all equally, the problem isn't her, right? And her attitude isn't a lack of maturity or an extremist thought, right? Because remember that for you "it's natural", not a sign that she needs to change
That guy will be single for a long time with his terrible behavior.
Unfortunately he may not be because women are willing to tolerate a lot. Too many women have zero self worth but luckily we have people like Elle trying to change that 🥰
good!
He's got the time to do on-the-street interviews, so he's probably trying to promote a channel or podcast.
Typical maidenless behavior.
Trust me. He has someone
Unfortunately not. These men prey on the desperate insecure women and they fall right into his trap. Truly heartbreaking 💔
The first time this happened to me was my own male cousin. He would throw compliments and then insults in one sentence. I remember we were 15 or 16 yrs old and he said something about me…..I literally said “you’re jealous of females and it’s sad af because you’re a man and we can’t be in competition with each other you’re not on my level nor gender” and walked tf off. I figured out that day that some men are mad because they’re not on our level at all when it comes to education, clothing, mindset, money, jobs etc. they’re jealous of us like really jealous. But when they’re with their boys they don’t have these same smart ass remarks.
You are absolutely correct! They are jealous of us because they can’t be us! 🥰
I experienced a similar thing at my first job. I was an English teacher for a small group of kids who were 2nd grade. It was my first job ever and first job as a teacher so I only had 1 class. When I tell you - I poured MY ALL into this class, I have perfectionistic tendencies (I am trying to get rid of them) and so I prepared very diligently for my lessons. The kids LOVED me and I loved them, I have that maternal instinct. THE PROBLEM came out of nowhere when one parent (a man OF COURSE 😪) saw me, we had a 20-second interaction (I just said hello, I am the new teacher) and from that point on this man HATED me. I was so young back then (19 yrs) and felt so much distress over this and cried. This man was obsessed (!!) with me - he would write emails to my bosses saying shit and insults about me, he would message me in the Viber group we had created for the class, talk shit behind my back that I sucked at my job (I didn’t, my group of kids reached a test score 98 out 100 at the end of the year) and that I didn’t deserve my job.
I cried and explained all of this to my male co-worker. In a good turn of events, I am thankful for this male co-worker, he actually CALLED him on the phone and told him off!!! And he said to me afterwards - that guy was so AFRAID to talk to me on the phone and I confronted him about everything he said. And he told me that he could barely hear this dude’s voice, he was so QUIET hahahh😂😂 He said to me: Don’t worry, that’s not a real man! A MAN said this about this pathetic insecure dude! HA! That must’ve hurt him. I don’t even know how he is a parent.
Then I shared this with other people and everyone’s explanation was the same - “he saw how beautiful and how smart you were at that young age and he was 1) horny, 2) he couldn’t handle it 3) he couldn’t access you in any way so he just HAD TO humble you (in his delulu mind). That’s what others told me and it finally CLICKED for me. Thank you for your comment! ❤ I am sorry that you had to experience that from your below bare minimum cousin. 😢 You really GOT him when you told him that in front of other men he is quiet as a monk!
Yeah as I've grown I've realised that a lot of men's hatred of women comes from the fact that they're jealous of us. They're jealous of our resilience, our friendships, and they're BIG TIME jealous that we're not as obsessed with them as they are with us.
@@ky9933 very true. In her last episode she talked about women being able to function without a man but not the same for men. You’d think they would treat us better since we’re the gatekeepers for babies smh 🤦♀️ I guess we’ll see how this plays out when we’re all about 40 when our daughters and sons are dating. Hopefully they won’t have to worry about this kind of bs
@@vanessaprincesssa exactly certain just have trash behavior smh.
I’m a medicine student and my older male cousin always tells me to humble myself
Guys want to make insulting eachother into a love language but guys I've dated in the past would puff out their chest when talking with their bros but become insecure and privately feel insulted and depressed by the comments behind closed doors.
One of my exes had his best friend always make comments about how I'm "out of his league". When it was just the 2 of us at home, my ex would ask me if I am more interested in guys other than him or he'd become obsessed by his looks. I would tell him I'm attracted to him and that I loved him but it seemed like the comments from his friends would over ride what I was actually telling him.
I think that's why there are a lot of men who are in marriages or long term relationships that ditch their male friends. Because their male friends have always insulted them under the guise of bonding. Once a guy finds a woman who is positive and kind, they realize that is the way a healthy relationship should be and they separate themselves from the negativity and "bro jokes" from their guy friends.
It's sad and not healthy. Men need friends. They can't rely on women for all of their emotional needs. Sadly it seems like they're stuck in a very unhealthy and insecure mindset of fearing anything "gay"
@@angelikaskoroszyn8495 that's true, guys do need other male friends but it's a matter of them finding other guys to have healthy friendships with. If they've outgrown their old "bro" friends, it's more difficult for them to find other guys who are now on their same wavelength. That's probably why some guys don't like change. They want a wife or girlfriend but prefer she comes down to his level. He gets to keep his crappy "bro" friends and everything works out for him. Meanwhile, no one is actually evolving and in some cases, the wife is de-evolving to be with him.
From what I've seen, good relationships should be based on desire to grow together and as individuals. Sometimes that means you outgrow your surroundings or old friends that want you to stay in the past.
I experienced this in my teen years and am much older now. I don't get why many men do this when they know it's hurtful. So strange that it must be primal/ instinctual for many men or some sort of rite of passage. I would understand if a man had poor behavior and "tough love" was how his peers motivated him to change and improve but they will insult even when the guy is doing well or has something good. I went through the same things as you. I would complement and uplift and he would go tell his friends, they would mock him, and he would come back to me for validation. I realize that men like this really need to find other friends, but their insecurity keeps seeking validation from the same set of toxic peers. And the "she's out of your league" tactic, is clearly said out of jealousy and is an attempt to keep that man chained to that particular peer group so that he doesn't surpass the people in it. because if they truly cared they would help him improve, but they can't because they are lacking themselves. The psychology behind this is interesting.
@@naturallyhoneybrown I agree, there's a lot of psychology behind these types of interactions between men. There's also a lot of psychology behind women/women and women/men relationships but the thing that's strange and unique about male relationships is the "hazing" type of behaviour. The need to show some kind of dominance by physically or emotionally hurting eachother. Then after they inflict these behaviours, they try to maintain these abusive relationships with eachother.
They laugh it off by saying "that's how guys bond" and say that women will never understand male friendships while they simultaneously crave kindness and caring from women. Then complain when they have no women in their lives and they're depressed 😆
They could be kind and caring to eachother but choose not to be. Then expect women to provide that for them while carrying forward their abusive ways learned from their male "friendships" into their romantic relationships.
As a guy, I have always been against insulting and degrading each other, never understood it. I don't agree that this is how guys talk; they are just insecure and stupid, jealous, and they try to sabotage, and alot of times are competing, I didn't realise it till late.
I actually feel the same way as the girl on the video, makes alot of sense
Newsflash to these… gentlemen: we’re not humbled. We just think you’re rude.
Dear men who may be watching this,
This old “pick up artist” technique where you neg and humble the girl DOESN’T WORK, especially with this new generation of women. This is what’s keeping you single, lonely, and for some of you, still a virgin.
If you want to get the ladies - treat them with love and respect. The late Don Knotts (Barney Fife, Mr Furley) was a NOTORIOUS ladies man, and they all said that it was because he treated the women like they were the most beautiful creatures on earth.
I am not sure that it ever worked. The Pick Up Artist sounded like Borat-style comedy to me. I am not sure it was ever meant to be taken seriously or tried for real.
It does work but on a certain type of woman @@cbushin
I like men tho 😢
@@toyotawitha20mm35 wrong comment section lol
@@peculiarnugget 😔
Jealous people always try to tear others down. I have a successful career, make good money, and I consider myself very beautiful. I’ve had many men try and make me insecure about my speech impediment. It makes me question their values and upbringing because it’s so rude to point something like that out! My husband has never once pointed it out or tried to make me feel insecure.
Glad you understand that and you have a man who loves you! Let’s not let these losers get in our heads!
That's why he your husband 😀😂😂
Found the dusty@@sen431
May god continue to bless you and your awesome husband sis ❤
But short men r disgustingly funny .
This showed up just hours after this exact topic was circulating in my head! I was so confused as to why the guys I’ve been in relationships with always felt the need to take me down a peg/humble me. It was never overt-quite insidious in fact, but I started catching on to the idea that it’s straight up insecurity. When I called out the last guy, he would dismiss my feelings and say, “It was in jest”, “you’re so serious”. No dude, you really need to figure out why you go out of your way to dig at me.
Men like that are the worst. It's essentially micro dosing you on verbal abuse. "You take things seriously" is them trying to negotiate down your standards/boundaries... to convince you to be their verbal (and probably physical) punching bag
@@HauteHorizonWell said. My ex-husband started off verbally abusive and then it turned physical. He would be so jealous of the attention I received in public (not even trying to garner it) and I once asked him why he never complimented me. He actually told me “because I don’t want you to get a big head.”
Yes, it's subtle and insidious and when you try to address it, they always have an answer. It's hard to get at and it's dark energy at the core.
@@transitionsncDark energy is exactly what it is.
I told one man that he wasn't sensitive enough. He didn't know how to respond. I also told him I took digs at him he would be in the corner balled up on the floor crying
I used to be surrounded by dudes in my last relationship (he needed the constant supply) and I caught on so early to how desperate they were to get a reaction out of “the girl.” Like, they’d say some of the most vile stuff- you know their mothers would be ashamed. Ashamed-!
Same thing literally happened to me recently. A friend of mine invited a guy over who repeadetely said that he "wants to f my mouth" IN FRONT OF THE GIRL WHO INVITED HIM. and he just KEPT going and going. It was so disgusting
True
You'd be surprised seeing the comments of guys on gym related videos, whenever it's a woman. A video will have a woman lifting up weights or showing off her muscules, and guys will flod the comments section with "men are still stronger" "I can lift up more than her" "that's right, let's humble this one" "men are biologically stronger" and it was never a competition video in the first place, it was just a woman showing her accomplishments but it throws them off so bad
Great observation
Similar to that one video I saw of a female black belt martial artist.
And all the men were triggered so bad.
All I can think off is "Hunty, she doesn't even know you exist?" Why did you start a fight? You're just having imaginary shower arguments with yourself, get a grip.
When I was a lot into gym fitness in my midtwenties, random (and often much older) man told me that it would make me ugly and that men wouldn't want a manly women and so on. No one asked you, Reginald!
I don't need to mention that the guys commenting weren't quite the "manly man" type or hot or anything, do I?
For real. And when the woman in the video is shown to be unbelievably strong, you’ll see comments from guys being like “are you a man or woman?” “You’re basically a man not a woman” “eeww ugly”
They’ll insult a woman for being tall, having a deep voice, etc… but when a man is not tall or doesn’t have a deep voice, it’s women’s fault they’re not the masculine standard lol
THIS. GIRL, you said it. 🎯🎯🎯
It’s so funny considering there are men who like deep voices and tall women.
@@FocusedVision-tk4zt it’s not, nothing in this video is misandrist, I’m a girl myself this video has nothing against men its more empathising on their insecurities, men lash out on women because of it and I experience it all of the time.
Also I’ve seen men make these types of videos too and they say things similar ways towards a women and people don’t call it misogyny do they. So maybe these videos aren’t sexism or gender hating it’s about truth of the Language of men that women aren’t aware of.
@@FocusedVision-tk4zt they dont want you either friend
Give me an example where the men said that "it's the women's fault they're not the masculine standards"? I'm confused.
yep everything is projection. if ppl are rude or mean unnecessarily they’re projecting some level of insecurity and unhappiness within themselves. always remember that.
Not a relationship but a professional one with my old boss. He would bring up my past mistakes I made over 7+ months ago and he would NOT STOP bringing it up. He was actively trying keep me “humbled” and “down”. Then I quit and I left a respectful review online 1:5 stars cus my time there was terrible. I didn’t even mention his name and I kept it as professional as I could.
He responded like “you’re broke, stinky and jobless” I’m not kidding 😂 I’m a 20 year old and this dude is 43 years old believe it or not. He was so unprofessional and just straight up rude. Yes he’s very insecure. Because my review wasn’t personally attacking him it was pointing out the problems I’ve encountered in the job. Age doesn’t equal maturity and I’m so happy I learned it sooner rather then later. 😂
I had one like that too. Very active and obsessive. I sent my two weeks on April fools and never looked back ✌🏽
pls tell me you didn't leave it there and took revenge
@@Adriana-so5jn It wasn’t just me he replied to many bad google reviews. Only mine he was so personal about it and just trying make me feel bad about myself lol. My friend who worked there for like 3 months he called OSHA and other places so. My friend even got a longer paragraph then I did from our old boss. I don’t know if anything happened since then. 🤷♀️ Karma will get em. 🤞
I also know 53 years old men who gas light 20 years old girl then say women will alone after they hit the wall. Older men like to date younger women is red flag, they're abusive and insecure
This happened to me in my last relationship. He always "joked" about my physical appereance, focusing on things that he knew I was insecure about. Turned out he was the most insecure man and was trying to put me down to keep me by his side. I was really sad and full of negative thoughts back then. Don't let them do that to you. You deserve to be happy and much more ❤️.
❤
Around 2:27 / 2:30:
Men: are mean to each other as a bro joke
Also men: "We never get compliments. Society hates men. 😢"
As a man, this was actually funny 😂
This is one of the reason why i don't have friends.
@@darkcodmobile5466 I hope you don't feel too bad about it bro, but if you do, I'm wishing you the best!!
@@darkcodmobile5466I'm a woman and I feel the same too lol
Exactly! Or they get jealous of other male friend groups that has positive dynamics!
Men can't stand it when you are confident and feel good about yourself or show that you feel good about yourself. They don't like it because it reminds them that they are not in your league. And they want to have some sort of power over you.🙄
Guy here, I actually respect women who are confident in themselves. I think it's a attractive trait in women that goes underappreciated and I think other guys should compliment on a woman’s confidence.
@@raygaming4306nice guy nice guy
I once saw a guy's comment who said that they preferred women without self-esteem or with emotional dependence because 'they are more adorable' 💀
@@BlackParadox-ct8knhuge red flag, what the actual fuck
@@BlackParadox-ct8kn HUGE YIKES. LIKE WTF?
In high school my bff was (and still is!) drop dead gorgeous. Like super model pretty. And she hates it. HATES it. She hates the attention, the compliments, the fawning, all of it. There was this bully gorl in high school who was always putting my bff down, hurting her self esteem. She made fun of my bff for "dressing like a slut" when she literally wears nothing but oversized band tshirts and jeans (it was the 90s grunge scene). So one day i whopped the bully girl real girl. Thump thump. Bully girl started acting so, so, so nice to my bff after that. But this bully girl damaged my friend for life. 25 years later and bff STILL hates being beautiful because she equates the attention as being negative. Either the men will get mean when she turns them down or the bully girls will get jealous. Seeing how much being pretty has hurt her has made me more ok with being average because i don't need that stress in my life.
I felt this in my SOUL; thank God for making me average!
No babe, the real problem is the people not the beauty, bullying pretty girls is a form of negative admiration and admission of the girls' beauty and also a form of admission that they bully pretty girls because they themselves feel self-conscious about being ugly or average and they want and wish to have a piece of the delicious cake of feminine beauty that was served to the girl they bully, beauty is a quality that you and many girls look for when putting on makeup and getting ready and that has value to people, do not deny reality, a few ugly or average girls know that it is good and popular to be pretty and that is why they bully pretty girls, a cordial greeting and you are an excellent friend, how good that friends like you exist 🙇♀️. PS: I say this being a super average girl physically with beautiful sisters
THUMP THUMP!!! ✊🫡.
"It's not your job to teach them how to be a proper grown adult."
"Compliments from men just don't hit as much as compliments from other women."
THESE! I did not sign up to be a Build-A-Man workshop! I had to grow up and learn how to be in the real world, why can't you? The world is literally at your fingertips, boundless information. We both know you're just going to correct me and ignore what I say anyway so save us both the time and headache and be an adult: look up a video on social interactions or how to do basic adult things.
Compliments from men, even mundane ones make my skin crawl. A compliment from another woman however: Makes my day. Even if the rest of my day is shit, it doesn't phase me because another woman complimented my eyebrows or a pin or my tattoo. Men compliment us and we shrink. Women compliment us and we ✨glow✨.
Compliments from men mean they want something. Compliments from women are genuine. The older I get, the more often I compliment other women as often as I can. We need so much more of this!
Hmm…interesting.
If I may ask, what is a “mundane compliment”?
I feel the same.
When men compliment me it makes me very difficult to believe that he's not doing it out of lust and interest, even when I know that he's a kind hearted man and it's likable he's genuine BUT he's still a man, a visual creature. That's why I don't say "thank you" and when I really do, I do it out of sheer education, I don't really mean it.
When it comes to women complementing me genuinely speaking, my sparkling personality comes with the word "Thank you" in my tone.
There are huge differences in being complimented by men and women.
We are both different!
@@scary5455 hi i think you replied to the wrong comment.
@@b_b_b5146careful it doesn’t become discriminatory.
seems to be a way of somehow engaging with women that would, otherwise, not give them the time of day.
That part
makes a lot of sense
oh my god YES.
Exactly
Yes. And I think often the men or whoever is producing these have scripted it and/or are paying them the girls/women.
All this is giving fifth grade “he bullies you bc he’s jealous of you” and honestly?? I thought we weren’t allowing people like that to graduate to the adult world ?? Did these men never learn “if you ain’t got nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all” back in kindergarten ?
There's this movie made by studio Ghibli "Tale of Princess Kaguya" and it tells a story about a beautiful moon princess who was sent to the earth and when she grows men want her, literally WANT her as a prize because she's so beautiful and talented, but they try to humble her as well saying that she's stubborn or doubting her beauty and her status openly to bring her down, because it's easier to claim a woman that isn't this loving beauty who can look down on you.
Remember girls, don't let a man make you believe you're on his level, cuz you're waaay above and his manchild ego feels threatened.
Why do I cry everytime I watch the movie? I already know what's going to happen, but still that last scene where she looks back at earth gets me.
That movie made me furious, it's all the dad's fault!
He dragged his family to the city
As soon as his daughter started her period, he put her on the marriage market!
He made her life miserable and was even so happy that the emperor wanted her for his harem, she had to threaten with suicide
Elle,
You literally saved my life and my sanity when I was going through a break up after being with someone for 8 years. Everything you speak on, I always knew and always thought about, but I didn’t know or understand how to articulate this. Thank you for being you and for being so valuable.
I feel the same
She's out here lifting women up and waking us up! I am grateful I found her channel.
Hello, how are you all? I hope you are safe and well. I am very sorry for anything that seems bad that may have happened in your life. I am sorry that you are struggling. Everything will get better. Know that you are amazing and have rights as a human. I want you to know that you are incredible and are capable of wonders. What matters is your inside, not your exterior. Love yourself and cherish yourself. Words cannot explain how astonishing you are. You deserve care, love, and happiness, don't let anything make you feel otherwise. You may or you may not think that you are a failure but you are not, we are humans and we are bound to make mistakes so failures will come but that will give you the prize of what you have learned. Even if it may be a very small prize, it is very significant and important because you are amazing and deserving to learn and grow just as everyone else is. Please have appropriate action for anything that you know is wrong. Try and find professional or trusted help. Anything that seems bad or wrong in your life right now will get better. Please do not consider suicide, always ask for help. Please don't do what is wrong, fighting back and harming others will not solve the problem. Please understand that and do the good thing. It will one day come back to you. The people in the world are so much more than what we know about them, not everyone opens up about the beautiful things and acts they have witnessed, not all those amazing doings are acknowledged. There is more to people than it seems. Please understand that and know that. If you feel like no one cares about you, know that I care about you. Keep your head up high and never give up. Together, we can be a better community. Stay safe, healthy, happy, kind, understanding, positive and strong. Have a great day.
Anyone else had your own mother do this to you? It took me a long time to realize that she did that to me because she was jealous and just a mean, nasty person. It did destroy my self-esteem growing up.
Yes.
I read that sometimes a girl's worst enemy is her own mother.
I can't understand why and it's so messed up
My mom isn’t terrible but she occasionally has called me a Princess and insinuated that’s a bad thing. She never takes care of herself so of course she equates self-care and self-love with acting like a Princess. But hey… I am 👑 ✨
I'm so sorry 😭 You deserve so much more
Yes! That's why I hate insecure people.
When I was in 8th grade a boy came up to me while i was getting books out of my locker and said i would be really pretty if I wasn't wearing glasses. I just stared at him blankly and said "You'd probably also look better if I wasn't wearing glasses." and walked away. his friends laughed at him.
Awesome answer, some of us ladies have hard times being assertive 😢
They hate to see women feel good about themselves 💀
I haven't watched the full video but is it about men from the west ?
They are just jealous because they are so insecure of themselves
No wonder woman didn't like them
Feel good about yourself bout don’t be a Bith about
@@ungabunga1964 not just from the west
My self-esteem is honestly pretty low, but I'd never try to "humble" someone for being better than me. Like, seriously, how in the world is bullying other people going to help you with your own problems?
Hes being passive aggressive... Trying to keep her unbalanced. He's not used to talking to confident women
I just noticed that there are never men in these comments. Usually when i watch these types of videos there's always a large amount of defensive men ready to strike.
She’s said so herself no men allowed many times. I think she deletes their comments lmao 😂
That's because she deletes any/all men's comments❤
Good❤
that's how it should be
@@strawberrytiramisuthat is what I love about her! She deletes them and lets them rage on their own. Their comments being removed allows us to focus on the main topic and have productive conversations
Him: "You're a beautiful woman."
Me: (nonchalantly) " Oh, ok."
Him: " Your voice is deep."
Me: " It's unfortunate yours won't ever be."
Him: "How often do you get compliments?"
Me: "I've lost count. What about you? Have you ever gotten a compliment?"
(Sweet smile)
Oh my god I had someone do the voice is deep thing to me but it was slightly different and more pathetic.
Him: what's your accent, where are you from?
Me: I'm from here and my accent is a cold.
Having a deep voice isn't even a bad thing imo. I have one and it's one of my favorite things about myself, and if a guy told me what he said to that woman in the video, I'd just respond "Yes I do, and I love it".
@@starrilyskyIt is to them because they define their own value over their archaic and contrived understanding of masculinity and how well they represent it. So they think women (classic projection) define themselves over their similarly archaic and contrived interpretation of what femininity is. I have a deep voice and honestly love it. On one hand for practical reasons such as people taking me more seriously. It may be a sad reality and speak volumes on our society but (especially in professional contexts) a deep voice is a beneficial characteristic to have. And on the other hand because it's such a contrast to my very feminine and sweet presentation. Balance, baby.
Add to the list ''you're quite short for a guy''
@@starrilyskyI don't even get, how "You have a deep voice" is an insult. It is a simple observation.
every time a man tries to neg me, I say “thank you” and act like it was a compliment and act confused if they try to tell me it wasn’t.
Cool story
@@Strongdadlifting thank you 💕✨
@@broelle4716 you’re welcome babe.
❤ ❤ ❤
Outsmart them! They love wasting their time bringing other women down
I should send this to my father,bc everytime he sees a women on tv that is not acting like he wants us to act he calls her ugly and dumb,when in reallity he is just terrified.
I used to follow a really big twitch streamer who would occasionally react to Jubilee type videos. Videos where women have to rank their attractiveness, videos where women have to speed date... Any time a woman displayed any sense of self worth or self confidence, he and his chat would laugh at her. Call her mid, say she's insufferable, begging for one of the men to "humble her". I kept wondering how can men like them who are average looking, don't have any specific life skills .... feel so judgemental and entitled to see someone else fail ? The truth is it's envy. A lot of men have grown up being told that even if they have absolutely nothing, they can still be entitled to judge other women. The way men sneer at women in the street with their friends rating their appearance and so on. This was their right, their privilege, and women like this who genuinely do not care what these men have to say about them are taking that away. That's why they keep coping "oh actually she does care about what men think, she just doesn't want to admit it". These men genuinely believe that women like this crave their attention, their validation, that these women work so hard on appearing attractive for them, it just kills them to know that there's beautiful confident women walking around out there who pay them complete dust and who are unphased by their shallow judgement.
ur a rlly good writer bro i cant even finish a sentance
That's so true..
I literally had a coworker tell me the reason i got moved to a different sector in work was because I wasn’t the boss’s type because I was “too old” . His dusty ass tried a few weeks earlier to low key hit on me and find ways to talk to me alone in the break room and outside of work , all while wearing an engagement ring . I guess because I didn’t give him my snap or insta , this was his slimy ass comeback 😂😛😛😛
They always do this play on women's biggest insecurities age,weight and personality well at least what is stereotypically considered to be womens biggest insecurities they want to break you down to build you up to their ideal partner it's so pathetic they are behaving like petty high school mean girls
They always do this play on women's biggest insecurities age,weight and personality well at least what is stereotypically considered to be womens biggest insecurities they want to break you down to build you up to their ideal partner it's so pathetic they are behaving like petty high school mean girls
Ohh the nervee I wouldve told him: "Honey you've been single for a long time and your resentment/ insecurity is *showing* " 😂
Ew. He was probs afraid you would turn him into HR. Which. Yes. If you feel comfortable with that… bc he should be fired.
@@schuylergeery-zink1923 yes !! I was working for a temp agency and when I told them what happened, they contacted HR on my behalf 🤍 thankfully my temp work there is completed so I don’t know what happened to him, but I’m just glad I don’t have to be around that energy anymore 😭🤍🙏
Ever since I started watching your videos, I've noticed that the people I allow in my life have added great value in my life and the people I let go were just dragging me down. Like, the people I allow in my life now really bring out this feminine energy in myself that I didn't even know I had before, and I really love it!
Keep going girl ❤
Negging is so disgusting! I had to drop a guy for negging me and my intelligence. I graduated Ivy league, and he tried to talk crap about my education. I'm also a homeowner, and I know that made him angry. 😂
The guy in the video is too short to be talking about any woman's looks.
The audacity! Good for u that you dropped him girlie
Can we change our height ?
@@Whotfru... nah but he could fix his personality. That’s what the commenter said. If you’re ugly/short you better have a charming personality or lots of money. 😂😂😂😂
@mommalion7028 money can fix any shit. Not my personality gonna do any shit.my personality is pretty good.
Women loves to talk to me but do they wanna have family with me ?probably or most probably not.
Cuz I am broke.
It baffles me that they even call this "humbling" women. You just go up to some random girl, you don't care that she has humility you just want her to feel bad to make up for how getting rejected by girls make you feel bad. Some people need to learn how to deal wit rejection.
Sounds like those men could use some humbling if they think it's their place to put down others.
I was dating a guy that NEVER ever complimented me. He would do it on purpose! I felt like that was his way of trying to humble me. Deep down I felt like it was coming from him being insecure and that was his way of making me bad or not good enough.
GIRL SAME!
I spent 2 years with my ex and he NEVER complimented me! And I am a girly who loves fashion and I put on outfits, ESPECIALLY for special occasion. On our anniversary that motherf-er actually TOLD me that I was… … Overdressed? 😅😂😂 That’s it. For 2 years, that’s the only remark on my appearance.
Yeah, that was my first ever longer-term relationship, it was a learning experience for sure. I left him in the dust.
Same about compliments! I got only negative responses about my behavior. No good thing could be heard from him. He also went further and didn't even call me by my name. Like, literally, he was addressing me 'you' all the time. I called him out, and he told me that his father, too, never calls his mother by her name. Thank God we broke up.
Nooooo! My husband completes me OFTEN. I don’t even know you and that makes me feel MAD.
@@vanessaprincesssa NAH NAH GIRL HE DID NOT DESERVE YOU. YOU'RE GORGEOUS AND FREAKING AWESOME! UR DRESSES ARE AMAZING
@@22mshangui THANKS BABE 💗 YOU ARE AMAZING TOO
This is going to sound weird, but I have experienced the "I need to humble her" situation with other women in workspaces. I don't understand why this keeps happening to me. I try to be non-threatening and never compete with others. Despite this, I've been invalidated at work despite how thoughtful and hardworking I am, or at least try to be...
It's not just that, maybe their insecure about their looks and feel you possess looks and/or traits they don't
Its because you try to be non threatening.
NOPE! THERES NO NEED to be "non threatening and never compete" People think you're an easy target. Be as intimidating and competitive as you can. SHOW THEM! There's NO NEED at ALL to be thoughtful to shitty people. You're a people pleaser, I can see that. You only get life once, be fcking selfish.
It could be beacuse you are pretty.
You being such a wonderful coworker is threatening to an insecure coworker. I'm sorry they take their own issues out on you don't let them dim your light ❤
My ex humbled me because I told him that every person I get the chance to bond with always ends up liking me.
That's bold of me to say that but that's the reality I experience. He tried to break my confidence any way he could.
Glad to hear he is your ex.
Best part of this is that you called him “EX”
Good riddance
@ yep ! And this weekend I’m getting married to a fantastic man. I’m glad I was firm and ran away.
@@christelle9122 GOOD JOB.
"You're beautiful but your voice is so deep."
"Yeah bro, you jealous? Don't worry, you'll probably hit puberty soon."
Hehehehe
Its so refreshing to see him try so hard to pin these 2 women agaisnt eachother and instead of fighting for his validation they just supported eachother. We as women should always do this when men like that pull that manipulation tactic.
He is doing that for the cameras. No men go up to two women and blatantly disrespect one while shooting for the other. Shit doesn’t happen
@@Strongdadliftingi am glad you didn't experience it! i personally do see many men do this passive aggressive stuff from my experience. That's why it's so nice to see these women have eachothers backs instead of tear eachother down:)
@@Strongdadlifting but they do though?
@@Strongdadlifting yeah just bc you never experienced it irl doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen buddy 💀
@@daddyhadrianThey do it all the time
As a woman with a deeper voice I like my voice its like a Jessica Rabbit voice
I love when women have rich, dark voices ❤❤❤
sis, i'm sure ur voice is magnificent (*･ω･ﾉﾉﾞ☆ﾟﾟ
I WISH i had a deeper voice 😢
I'm sure tour voice is the good as the way you are❤@@naptime4foxy
I have a deep voice too and I used to be really insecure about it because I just wanted the cute sweet girlie sounding voice. Then a girl told me she is super jealous of my voice because apparently I can command a room full of people and everyone attentively listens to me talking. I never really noticed that how much people just stop talking or doing whatever they are whenever I start talking about whatever. So now I'm not all that insecure about my voice anymore although a soft sounding voice has its own benefits in life which I still wish I had.
She reacted so calmly. like she just explained. Oh this is who this is and she's the villain in my movie. And give him no opening to like really make her angry at all
Nobody can humble you if you have your own confidence
Not true. I guarantee if you married a man and 4 years into the relationship he started randomly hurting your feelings when he was depressed you'd start questioning shit.
I realized after the fact that my ex boyfriend “humbled” me a lot throughout our relationship and masked it as teasing. It was really horrible for my mental health but I’m more confident in myself now. I’ve started dressing in a coquette style which I enjoy, it makes me feel myself and pretty!
You never hear a handsome confident guy makes a comment on your physical appearance it's always the ugly ones ...
Right
The fucking frogs 😭
@@anthem91b 😂😂😂😂lmaooo
I can confirm. I get stared at an awful lot. But NO ONE complimemts me or even approaches me. Over time it made me insecure. I started to think I wasn't "cute" enough to approach.
It’s because you’re way too beautiful that people are scared to approach you.
You can approach them
2:14 In Spain they did an interview with a man who was part of dating groups where they did these types of techniques. Over time the boy realized that it was something toxic and got out of there. He said that they do it to denigrate the other person and eliminate their self-esteem, because the only way they can get a girl to pay attention to them is to destroy their self-esteem first. It is a manipulation technique, basically they are trained not to have empathy towards women.
The men in my life (boyfriend, friends, my father), they don't talk like that and they are not bad with each other. It's just a thing if the manosphere, the "alpha male clown"
My dad said he and his mother said, they have to “break me”. My father is never invited to anything I do, after inviting him once. To an art show, he told me at my art show I should get a job???? Excuse me????? Some men are so jealous of women, even the women they are related to. It’s disgusting and sad!
a girl once told me "i like your smile it's really pretty"
i started smiling more often and openly because of that
Here in northern England/ UK, we have a long history of strong take no shit working class women . If a guy tried to humble us he would regret it, in fact they take pride in the fact. Respect has to be earned, and trying humiliation don't cut it!
lovee northern women
@@kezziahhhsameee
Yeah.cap
I had this male friend who, when he didn't have what else to neg, literally picked genuinely random features about my body I never even thought I could be insecure about. He legitimately insulted my nostrils once. It was random and a bit unhinged. 🤷♀
When Harry met sally
This hit the mark on so many points in my lived experience. When I was young and naive I attracted so much unprovoked lude and negative attention from all age groups of men who were complete strangers wherever I went. I thought it was normal and did'nt know how to shut those kind of disrespectful creeps down like I do now.
Then when I was in commited relationships, there was always that common thread of the man being in love with the fact that I DID shine so bright in a room full of people, but after a little while they resented the stares I would get everywhere we went. They would get controlling, tell me to dress more conservatively, to tone myself down. They did'nt reaize that being with me meant that they would have to compete for the spotlight. Or have rude people constantly saying "you're sooo lucky to be with her, you know that right?" or "how did YOU end up with her??" when I'm not around, fueling their insecurity. I have literally been told in two separate relationships that the reason they don't ever tell me i'm beautiful, is becuse they dont want me to get a big head. Wow. Just because you hear me getting compliments from strangers does'nt mean they make me feel good. The only person I care about telling me i'm beautiful is the one i'm actually with. Sad.
So...i've learned to clearly identify these insecure behaviors in others, to never again attempt to dim my light to make insecure people feel more in control, and to carry myself in a way that says "you"ll be sorry if you mess with me" when in public to keep creeps and negative losers at bay. It also does'nt hurt that i've spent the last 10 years training several days a week in reality based combatives martial arts and firearms. I'm now a Muay Thai Kickboxing instructor and partner in running women's Self-Defense seminars. This beauty...is a beast.
No way I’m reading all that.
@@Strongdadlifting then don't
If I had heard the things that Elle says here as a teen, my life would have gone very differently. .. I'm glad to at least hear them now. Thank you Elle. 🙏
I have a male “friend” who without failure will always point out one negative thing in my appearance every time I see him. Usually my posture, or eyebags, something small and so out of pocket. He would often mention negative things about my boyfriend’s appearance unnecessarily too. I always just brushed if off as rude and other than those interactions he was a pretty nice guy and fun to be around but this past year I grew out of that friendship. I don’t need people like that around me. I saw him at a Christmas Party a couple of days ago and we were catching up and chatting expressing how it was good to see each other and I thought to myself wow how nice!! Until about five minutes in he had to mention how my upper lip has shrunk and is getting smaller. My upper lip?! Really… I called him out on it this time and said it wasn’t necessary to make negative comments about other’s appearance and how he has a habit of doing that. He claimed it wasn’t negative and was just an observation. I said fine, it’s still rude, not cool, and expressed how I don’t like it. He was a bit taken aback. Kindness counts for a lot in my book. And of course I compared pictures of myself when I got home that night lmao, my lips are exactly the same.
So personal experience moment.
I grew up with brothers. I was used to the negging. So when I got married I thought this was normal.
Being married for a while now and after having my baby the negging hits me hard, I started to get really insecure that my husband is no longer attracted to me.
I can now say that I feel jealous when a woman is beautiful and happy. Because I feel so miserable inside.
I hate this part of me. I don’t even want to act on this toward an innocent woman.
But I think that the goal is to take care of yourself so you are deeply happy. Because living in jealousy is miserable
Its okay to feel jealous as u cant control it. However u can choose to be kind, not be mean and sit with your emotions. Not lashing or projecting on someone else.
You're not a horrible person because you know what your jealousy is telling you? It's saying you deserved better 👏👏
Turn that jealousy around as motivation
Also keep in mind that everyone is just human. Beautiful people are also people with problems and insecurities. Maybe that will help you feel more grounded and not put other women on a high pedestal
yes watch out for both men and women who tries to humble you. my ex best friend who was always around me watched me constantly get compliments all the time so one time she popped off while someone new was giving me a compliment and said "yeah yeah we get it, she's pretty, she look pretty every day" with an attitude, and im just damn, why do you seem bothered. I put effort into looking presentable every day so yes I will take the compliments, even though I already know it.
I got negged once. Didnt realise it was negging at the time. I was nothing to write home about, so I was utterly baffled at why this twat was following me around all afternoon, gradually pissing me off more and more with his twattery. It cumulated with me screaming 'Fuck off and stay fucked off' in the middle of a crowded room.
He took another woman home that evening who looked somewhat like me and punched her lights out out of nowhere whilst having sex. With retrospect, Im almost certain he was thinking about me telling him to fuck right off whilst he did it. The moment they give you an attitude like this, MAKE NOISE and then LEAVE. They are predators, and predators HATE outside attention.
Who the hell you hang around 😂😂😂
@@Strongdadlifting it doesn't matter who you hang with they will find you anyhow
Women are one and interchangeable to them then. And it all goes back to their mothers. Every woman is their mother.
Don't baby your boys. Hold them accountable and direct their attention to their father, who is hopefully setting a great example for them. But don't be too hard on them either or they'll feel rejected. Let them give you a hug. Don't force them to give you a pedicure or anything like that. Treat them like a real person with potential to grow and they'll become one.
I used to be mean to attractive girls because I was bullied by mean attractive girls. But then I had my glow up and people went from being neutral or nice right off the bat to being straight up rude and mean. I had an epiphany moment and realized I was doing the same thing to innocent girls. Now I have tons of girlfriends of all different looks and styles and I’m so much better for it. Girls are the best and we should always have each other’s backs
So you bullied attractive girls? Were these the ones bullying you (thus fighting back not bullying) or just randos (plain bullying)?
This is beautiful. So happy on ur growth and journey to pure love xx
At the end of October I was invited to a really huge interview. It was the biggest interview of my career. I was in the "talking stages" with a guy and told him about the interview. He asked me how I'm going to prepare for the interview and I told him that I wasn't sure yet because I just got the invitation and I had a lot on my plate. He then said "oh don't worry about it. It's not a big interview so I'm sure you won't need to prepare much." The funny thing is, we're both in the legal field but he left the field because he was being bullied by a woman and he was so traumatized that his parents told him to leave and they'll support him. I was also being bullied but by a man but I don't have the luxury of being able to walk away. I stuck it out and walked into this new amazing opportunity. He buckled under the pressure and his parents got him an apartment. This interview was HUGE and it was leaps and bounds above what I was and the fact that I was even shortlisted for the interview is a huge nod towards my abilities and legal mind. I was shocked that he had the audacity to minimise it.
When he found out that I was accepted and I was successful in my interview, he sent a text praising me for my ambition and resilience. Unfortunately for him though, I heard it. I heard EXACTLY what he was saying behind what he said and I'm no one's fool or punching bag.
He now stalks my Instagram stories like he's hiding outside in the bushes. Whew Chile.
i feel like men don't neg their friends in the same way they do to women. like there was no humor in his voice when he insulted her at 1:38, he just did it to manipulate her. i imagine if he talked to another man that way he'd get called out for being disrespectful as fuck
nah they do
some toxic guy friend groups have a pecking order just like toxic girls friend groups. and sometimes the guys that neg women are the ones that get picked on in their "friend" group
@@janeyawx5165 definitely, these are men who can’t compete with other men in society so take it out on women
I get catcalled a lot and i noticed a pattern here. The moment you turn them down, they immediately try to turn "she didn't choose me" to "i wouldn't choose her"... like right after they where desperate for your attention, they pull out a "who would even date her?" kind of line!
It's not your looks, it's that you didn't lower yourself to their level and tbh... it screams their insecurity from miles away
As someone who favors tradition and religion, I myself have been left dumbfounded by the way these guys treat women and left wondering, “do these guys actually like girls?” But I guess the best way to think of this is that being attracted to something and liking something aren’t the exact same thing. These guys might be attracted to girls, but they don’t like them. Generally, as you said, we don’t like being rejected - no one does. This doesn’t justify them obviously, but it’s probably what’s going on in their heads.
One time I read comments saying that a woman who called herself a 3 was a sign of a good woman. Eugh. Notice how they only refer to women as a women (instead of female) when they've successfully lowered their self esteem.
So real
This!! Smh
And they say women are jealous of each other but this is really alarming…like what is this obsession of telling women let alone complete strangers that they aren’t shit…it’s giving the vibe that they were rejected a lot when they were young and now they’re projecting that on every woman in their adult life
It’s actually sick how abusive so many men are. It’s quite psychotic.
We are living in an age where some folks think that it’s okay to project their insecurities onto others - and that’s *not* okay.
I’m not a jealous girl, but I will call someone out if and when they give me a reason to.
I listened to this 3 times because I am currently dealing with a man who doesn't compliment me much *he is like this with everyone* but idgaf! I know I am worthy of being spoiled and complimented. I think he is insecure and therefore feels the need to humble me. I needed to hear this let me get back to myself LEVEL TF UP and realize what one won't do 10 will🧘🏾♀️
Period!!
What grown woman wants to be spoiled?
@@Strongdadlifting What grown man sneaks into a girl's club to insert his own opinion? Nobody gives af what you think.
@@heyhey439 sneaks? I was beckoned
@@thatonegirlsaki You are literally in the spoiled girlie club rn maybe go watch something else lol
My mental response to "your voice is very deep" was "aw, thanks! It really isn't, but I guess it sounds deeper compared to yours."
Pay attention to how you feel around other people. How they make you feel. Protect your energy.
1:52 that's NOT an insult!!
He's negging and THINKS he's insulting her her, but it really isn't!
Many many confident, and secure women of strength and character, speak with force and power through our voice!
When men say that as an insult, they're really just insecure, intimidated and told on themselves 😂
He tried to tear down her self-confidence, and she rose above. Then he tried to pit them against each other, and they rose above. Now they're standing up high supporting each other and he's swimming in the swamp alone