6 Ways A Man (Over 40) SHOWS His Love To You

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  • Опубліковано 27 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 132

  • @JonathonAslay
    @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +6

    FREE Call with Jonathon► jonathonaslay.com/coaching

  • @judystreich7333
    @judystreich7333 Рік тому +23

    Resonates with me. My husband and I were married 47 years. The last seven I took care of him., he was severely disabled because of a stroke and the last 8 months with hospice before he passed. A couple of days before he passed, he called me over to him, he said I want to tell you I love you. It was rough and after 6 months now, I am so heartbroken.

  • @jadams34
    @jadams34 Рік тому +36

    "I want to take care of you..." We're older now... those words matter... Thank you for making that very clear this morning 🌄🙂

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +3

      You are so welcome

    • @kristir1262
      @kristir1262 Рік тому +8

      Exactly! I had a zombie (repeat ghoster) out to prove I didn't matter to him. I genuinely don't know what he was punishing me for with his silent treatment. But I'd had enough.

    • @medinaseaborn2227
      @medinaseaborn2227 Рік тому +2

      @Kristi R, I have experienced this behaviour, it felt the guy was punishing for liking him. Punishing me for his wife's treatment of him. Really hurts

  • @wendyh.9363
    @wendyh.9363 Рік тому +24

    This video re-enforced why I had to break up with someone recently. Thank you.

  • @rebeccahenson6989
    @rebeccahenson6989 Рік тому +3

    Your video here is so resonating to me, I am going to share it with my man. We met by accident long distance online nearly 5 years ago, but recently reconnected strongly. Because of our later ages, we both don't have the time to be committed in anything but each other. We're there. If he actually DOES come home to me this time as he says he will, we must have plans for creating an actual committment with one another in every way you laid out here for us. I want marriage this time for the final stage of life. He's my forever. He says I am his. Time will tell if his heart matches his spoken words ❤ lt's time he gets serious and he comes home to my side of the world. Thank you for your words of wisdom. You are truly blessed with God's Grace 🙏🏽

  • @maryjoolson344
    @maryjoolson344 Рік тому +3

    Most often, when the energies are relaxed, fun, and mutually exciting--and dare I say it--the age gap is not too great, both will want partnership

  • @aliceswarts3684
    @aliceswarts3684 Рік тому +8

    They do exist ladies! I just (last night) met a wonderful man.
    I don't know if he's the one for me, but he seems to be a true gentleman.

  • @musicdesign7264
    @musicdesign7264 Рік тому +12

    Had an email exchange with a guy on dating app. He stated he wanted a LTR. I dug deeper and he skirted around a commitment as goal. It pays to ask hard questions before meeting.

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      Exactly

    • @Fanlady4236
      @Fanlady4236 Рік тому

      The first comment he made was the true one. He was not invested in a relationship then so told the truth. I would feel the second comment was to keep you hanging on waiting for a commitment. I would tell him what he said the first time, then the second time and tell him it seems he cant decide and you will not commit unless he does. Why do we keep those questions in our mind but don’t ask out loud? Ask him. Ask him if he is confused because his statements clash. Speak your doubts and questions out loud

    • @debmccafferty1007
      @debmccafferty1007 Рік тому

      Had failed LDR. Person lacked courtesy and blew us up with catfished photos.

  • @anikovaradi753
    @anikovaradi753 Рік тому +2

    🌷This topic is one of the most important one for women I think. There are so many of us has not learnt properly what love means from a man, how a man act, what do we experience in a loving relationship. What we should seek and also expect in the behaviour of a man. This is probably one main reason WHY women accept unworthy, low treatment, which might be still common. So yes, everything giving a clue and knowledge about it, is valuable for many women, the quality of our lives, for the ones and for society. And it is always good to remind us of these things. Thank you Jo brother. 🙂

  • @ArtLoverScotland
    @ArtLoverScotland Рік тому +3

    This resonated hugely with me. I cannot thank you enough for this video As if I needed ANY confirmation following my first weekend away with my lovely guy, he fits every single thing in that list. 8 hours driving with him from Scotland to London, the whole weekend, and another 9 hours drive back to Scotland (accident bad on motorway) I learned even more about his feelings on the road trip too! He does express verbally and by his actions he cares and wants to care for me. We did the dating vow together last friday, our IS a fully intentional relationship. We are going through the eight dates too. Have already discussed finances, illness, family, childhood, intimacy, work commitments, and so much more
    I have never ever vetted a man as fully as I vetted ths one. I asked some very deep and searching questions VERY early on. He has ALWAYS been totally transparent. We have had over 100 hours of face to face talking just about everything (even more now) two weeks in and we know 'this is the 'real thing' and are already planning what our future will look like. Yes there are challenges, work commitments, but we are resolving these issues, by being flexible on either side. He works I do not, so I can 'fit in' to a tight schedule so we can be together 3-4 days a week nights too.
    He truly is the most special, honest, caring, loving affectionate, emotionall intelligent mature guy I have EVER know and he has been in therapy as have I to sort out childhood and adulthood 'issues'... We are very intentional in everything, he wants t please me and I him /we absolutely are there for eachother and have eachother's back.
    I am truly the most firtunate woman inthe world Jonathan and he the most fortunate man. He has said so. He said \I am the one he has been looking for, I am all he ever wanted... I feel exactly the same and I am bowled over. I am so grateful to YOU JONATHOAN FOR GIVING ME THE ROADMAP TO LOVING WITH INTENTION. You're truly a brilliant coach........THANK YOU with love and appreciation from Scotland. I have absolutely, and irrevocably met MY match.

    • @xjyoyo
      @xjyoyo Рік тому +1

      I feel inspired when reading this 🎉

    • @ArtLoverScotland
      @ArtLoverScotland Рік тому

      @@xjyoyo aww...that has to be the most beautiful and generous comment I have ever had. Thank you. May you find your Mr perfectly perfect for you ... x

    • @bettinahayes3314
      @bettinahayes3314 Рік тому +1

      So lovely to read this. Someone (actually 2 someones), that listen to stupendous advice, are doing/have done the homework. On my way to whst you are experiencing. Have and am also taking the time, doing the self work & being PATIENT...😁

    • @ArtLoverScotland
      @ArtLoverScotland Рік тому

      @@bettinahayes3314 ohhh brilliant. I didn't do the vettingbrihoroudly before and fell.flat on my face. No one to blame except myself. This time..patience ..books...and following Jonathan sterling advice...bingo! I sincerely truly wish you well...love yourself b4 anything YOU matter. Smiles...

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      I'm honored... thank you for your kind words, much appreciated 🙏

  • @Lillyofthevalley222
    @Lillyofthevalley222 Рік тому +10

    I must be the exception to the rule. As an independent divorced woman, I get a lot of great companionship from my other female friends. The time that I have on my own I also really enjoy. I find most men want serious relationships at this stage (I’m 50 now) but I’m not really sure that I do. I’ve spent so many years looking after other people that it’s incredibly uplifting not having to look after a man.
    Maybe It’s because my ex husband was very controlling and couldn’t do anything for himself. But I think more older woman prefer to be on their own. Unless the woman isn’t financially independent perhaps?

  • @GodsGrace987
    @GodsGrace987 Рік тому +11

    Those are the words I so long to hear. I’ve been divorced for almost 10 years now and had 2 serious relationships both lasting roughly 2 years. Everything in between maybe a couple weeks or months of casual dating. I am definitely and always have been seeking commitment. Not necessarily marriage post divorce but a commitment definitely. I know it goes both ways Jonathan as you always point out to me….but the number of men I have encountered who have absolutely flat out lied saying they wanted a relationship in hopes of getting intimate with me are astounding. Maybe they are good men but their intentions with me we’re definitely not. Maybe like you say it was just the lust and limerence…but regardless it’s so hurtful to be misled or in some cases used. I would never do that to a man I can promise you that. I’m very upfront and I know what I want. I’m also clear on my feelings and intentions. I think that in itself is extremely intimidating to people. As I’ve been told by both men and women of all kinds of relationships that I’m intimidating because I have such a clear vision of myself and path. I’m in a season of being very intentional with whom I spend time with. No more time wasters or men looking for casual anything. If I want what you just talked about…well that takes intentionality my friend. And your channel has really helped me on that to go deeper than surface level which is definitely where I was. Afraid to ask those questions in the beginning for fear of being too much. Those days are over. I’ll probably turn off majority of the men I meet but the right one will be okay with my questions. ❤️☺️🙏🏻✌🏻

  • @dfaz333
    @dfaz333 Рік тому +2

    Wow! Well said Jonathan. Thank you

  • @Mr.tabletalk
    @Mr.tabletalk Рік тому +5

    Great video! I really appreciate the insight on how men over 40 show their love. It's important to understand that not everyone expresses their love in the same way and it's important to recognize and appreciate the unique ways our partners show their affection. Small gestures and nonverbal cues are especially helpful. Keep up the good work!

  • @beayates6228
    @beayates6228 Рік тому +2

    Excellent definition of commitment and love

  • @marilynlarson9781
    @marilynlarson9781 Рік тому +12

    GREAT content Jonathon! I wish more men would learn from you!

  • @angelicacequeda2637
    @angelicacequeda2637 Рік тому

    You make me see things about the expression “I love u “ so clear thank you !

  • @annabellacrewe8858
    @annabellacrewe8858 5 днів тому

    Your sound is more smooth in that room ! Could you please continue in that place ? Thank you from Sophie, DK😊

  • @paulasliger7734
    @paulasliger7734 Рік тому +1

    Love this. I've actually said several of these things to my significant other. Thank u Johnathan for confirming my relationship strategy.💚

  • @christinezirk9323
    @christinezirk9323 Рік тому +2

    Hi Jonathan. Great information. I'm just starting to get to know someone who's a bit long distance but we're communicating well. Good thoughts and raises those tuff conversations. That's what you're teaching me. Thank you! I believe we both are looking for the long term relationship 🙂 I'll keep you posted

  • @ritaderuiter8105
    @ritaderuiter8105 Рік тому +2

    Yes, absolutely! I do not settle for less! Lol, it might take a while, but it's worth it!

  • @karencunningham1256
    @karencunningham1256 Рік тому +1

    After my partner died I didn’t think I’d find anybody else. I love to hike so I joined a local group. A man from the group asked me to go to dinner. We had a good time. He’s very classy and quite romantic. I’m more of a free spirit and almost fiercely independent. We’ve only seen each other outside of the hiking group a couple of times. It feels to me like he’s in kind of a hurry and I don’t want this to go too quickly. However, I’m 63 and he’s 73, so I guess I can understand the urgency. 🤣🤣 Tonight we were talking on the phone and he asked if I’d like to go away for a weekend. This ain’t my first rodeo, so I know what that means. My first thought is, we need to know each other a little better.
    Should we have 8 Dates and then decide?

  • @CatherineInColorado
    @CatherineInColorado Рік тому +4

    I'm very grateful you are here to help us determine the men who want truly desire a true partnership.

  • @astariaseraphina2478
    @astariaseraphina2478 Рік тому +5

    ❤ Thank you for sharing these insights

  • @cindyhoyt5909
    @cindyhoyt5909 Рік тому +1

    Thank you Jonathan! I look forward and I'm praying to meet my guy this year and to have each other's back, Etc! And love The View

  • @debbycostanich1696
    @debbycostanich1696 Рік тому +2

    I love these points and boy, is my marriage not there and never will be.

    • @lindacosta5688
      @lindacosta5688 Рік тому

      Time to jump ship, sweetie:)
      Been there, done that

  • @Suessserat
    @Suessserat Рік тому +1

    Love has some ways to be "real", at one point, it can be at the beginning some not so certain thing...but when shared time, activities, open conversations, some difficult (and some nice, too) moments together bring you to the moment to see clearly you got a real thing with someone, full of respect, trust, sincerity, honesty and deepfulness, maybe, although some romantic (words) lacks, you understand and appreciate, that´s also love. I´m talking about some 50+ people, what´s really new for me ( I was used to see some younger men before)....but very interesting to experience, from which I´m learning every day about myself, too. Thanks, very useful und nice video!

  • @Smileygld123
    @Smileygld123 Рік тому

    I met a guy recently who was straught up honest about this meed for casual. He has serious stuff going on in his life. I appreciated it, and was fine with it, especially aince I have reservations based on what's going on with his life.. It was great to not have to guess. We're friends, we'll see how much we hang out considering the distance, but It's fine with me, either way.

  • @kayhansen9229
    @kayhansen9229 Рік тому +5

    This was a very good video. I started off with these values as a teenager. Wish I had another life to live over again. And a way to meet these men. But first I must find housing. Thanks for reinforcing what I have always known to be true.

  • @loganross4774
    @loganross4774 Рік тому

    InLove this videos!! Yes!! It resonates with me! ❤

  • @JKNat9004
    @JKNat9004 Рік тому

    Very helpful video. Thank you!

  • @indyd9322
    @indyd9322 Місяць тому

    Where do I find a man who wants a relationship like this?
    I looked for men irl, but no one my age is there. I looked for men on dating apps, but most of those dudes either just want hookups, to only text, or maybe casual dating. There's no dudes seriously wanting a real relationship.

  • @ArtLoverScotland
    @ArtLoverScotland Рік тому

    Thanks

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      Awe... thank you 😊

    • @ArtLoverScotland
      @ArtLoverScotland Рік тому

      @@JonathonAslay My pleasure Jonathan....you really helped me to focus my mind and ask the 'right deep questions' by folllowing your marvellous advice, I now have a great guy, and we are working on OUR future xxx

  • @michellebolyard1388
    @michellebolyard1388 Рік тому +5

    What about a man that tells you early on that they aren't looking for someone because they have a child at home, but a few months later start talking about your future together?

  • @medinaseaborn2227
    @medinaseaborn2227 Рік тому +5

    Friendship, I want a best friend and a lover 😂 lol

  • @ksref
    @ksref Рік тому +2

    Volume could be higher. Having to nearly max on this end

  • @nanciewanda
    @nanciewanda Рік тому

    I am going to send this to a guy who thinks that you can be in a committed, trusting relationship just by text & (I assume) talk. I just can't get the concept of having to be with each other IRL through to him! And many men have told me this! Thank you for addressing this directly.💜

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +2

      Yes, those are called Cyber Relationships...

    • @sherriflemming3218
      @sherriflemming3218 Рік тому +1

      It's Impossible Tol Have A Texting Relationship - Natalie Clarice
      Are They Giving Me Breadcrumbs? Coach Craig Kenneth ( avoidant attachment)

  • @jcszot
    @jcszot Рік тому +3

    Yup…..do what you say…..say what you mean.

  • @livingtruth8962
    @livingtruth8962 Рік тому

    Jonathan what do you think about couples in a long term relationships travelling solo?

  • @juliewells8564
    @juliewells8564 Місяць тому

    I don't care...you should never lie to get what YOU want. It's unfair to lie and make someone think you're exclusive, when you're not. The other person ends up feeling foolish, deceived, unable to trust again, and like me...disgusted with relationships and given up! Just tell them freaking truth!

  • @bettinahayes3314
    @bettinahayes3314 Рік тому

    Such great insights, as always.

  • @lisak663
    @lisak663 Рік тому +3

    Jonathon is incredible in a world gone mad by swiping and short term whatever....

  • @kristir1262
    @kristir1262 Рік тому

    @10:02 "equal footing... Your feelings matter to me, your best interests matter to me, you matter to me"
    I was sick this past week, garden variety viral coughing/sneezing fever thingie. And this one guy on bumble asked me every single day how I was feeling. Recommended hot drinks and remedies once or twice too. But mostly just touching base with me.
    Not sure where things will go with this guy, but literally this is what I want out of a relationship. To care about someone. To be cared for.
    And so I finally blocked my zombie on fb last week. I'll probably still have to deal with him in person some day, sooner or later (workplace dating sucks).
    Two weeks ago I talked to a friend I hadn't talked to in years. She put the zombie and his actions in such frank words in front of me.
    I really couldn't have gotten back with the zombie, but she gave me strength.
    I reactivated my old bumble profile (used for a few months, three years ago), updated photos, info, and criteria (the age range didn't automatically update with my age 😂). After I had like nine people I could talk to, I paused my profile. Currently I'm talking to two people, one of them is more frequent.
    Of course, he's a ten hour drive away from where I am, so things are up in the air. But I'd rather be hopeful than not.

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +2

      Being hopeful is better than being fearful...

  • @patriciaviii
    @patriciaviii Рік тому +4

    Hey, Jonathon
    I am curious. Lately men just want the easy way with women. Ex: I am talking to someone and he lives in New Jersey and I in New York. He always throws it out there and say come to NJ. I told him if you want to see me, come pick me up. Is it because he has no respect for me, or maybe there’s no interest?? I feel like men are use to getting it the easy way. What is your perspective on this? I would appreciate it. Thanks

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +8

      Your assessment is correct... many men don't make much effort unless they think they met the one.

    • @patriciaviii
      @patriciaviii Рік тому

      @@JonathonAslay makes sense. Thank you!

  • @lilliankillian7366
    @lilliankillian7366 Рік тому +2

    Yes I think Actions mean alot my 3year relationship is with a good guy. Not much with words but shows alot. . Dosent thst mean something?

  • @marybowers6090
    @marybowers6090 Рік тому +3

    I don’t want to play house, it’s a morality thing. I’m looking for marriage and more guys lie about their relationship intentions to the point that I have had to take intimacy off the table. Makes me sad but honestly today I cannot trust most men as far I can throw them. Women are treated like low level
    Prostitutes today. The average cost 💲 n my state for a prostitute is $370.00 an hour yet most men expect sex for dinner. This is really unsettling to me. It’s so degrading

  • @BeccaL2016
    @BeccaL2016 Рік тому +3

    I'm NOT USING sex as a weapon, but my point here is that I think when guys get sex from women without going into a committed relationship, they will not likely to commit, they may still date you "for sex", so my thinking is, don't have sex with them (you could kiss, be intimacy without physical sexing) until they ask you to be their gf, this is a "gift" to them by asking for a committed relationship. But if they never ask you to commit or they walk away because you don't want to have sex, they are not serious with you anyway, that is if you want a serious/committed relationship..but I could be wrong though...just putting my thoughts here..Also you need to work on your fears too, whatever that is, which could be "afraid of being alone", "needy", etc, once you overcome your fears, you'll have better/healthy relationship!

  • @staywellandstrong4199
    @staywellandstrong4199 Рік тому

    This should be a Great One - especially since Love languages are important to know about as time goes by...

  • @jbeat66
    @jbeat66 Рік тому

    Those are exactly the things I mean when I say "I love you"...

  • @emilyw5522
    @emilyw5522 Рік тому +1

    🙏🙏🙏 one day

  • @theresashetler
    @theresashetler Рік тому +1

    Thank you for the excellent advice. What are the odds that a self proclaimed player can transform into being in a monogamous long term relationship?

  • @syedarumpa7013
    @syedarumpa7013 Рік тому +1

    My 58years old fearful avoidant man married 43years old narcissist woman.They were 20years affair and 7years Married. I'm 36years live in Asia and his own house.He brought me here! He live in America.We are anxious and avoidant relationship. Why he don't open up when he trust me fully? Its 2years situationship. What Can i do for his come to me and marry me? Please forgive my English🙏

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +2

      I'm sorry, I don't understand...

    • @wendyh.9363
      @wendyh.9363 Рік тому +2

      Oh honey, sounds like he has a family elsewhere. If he wants to be with you exclusively, he'd be with you.

  • @danielalaeros
    @danielalaeros Рік тому

    Hi there! Can someone please let me know where I can find the "relationship contract"? I think that's what Jonathan calls it?? It's the outline of what one is looking for in a committed relationship. Do y'all know what I'm referring to? 🤔

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      In the description of this video

    • @danielalaeros
      @danielalaeros Рік тому

      @@JonathonAslay got it! Thank you. Once I watched the video, I was like, "oh there it is!"

  • @saab6032
    @saab6032 Рік тому

    time stamps or some titles will be good

  • @BeccaL2016
    @BeccaL2016 Рік тому

    Hi Johnathon do you have videos on how you and your gf met? What made you to commit and how many dates you guys had physical intimacy if you don’t mind sharing? Like real life cases study 😅

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      Yes, it's called: How To Make Your Relationship Work in 2023

    • @BeccaL2016
      @BeccaL2016 Рік тому

      @@JonathonAslay Thanks! Only have one suggestion, seems like the sound vol in your videos are low comparing to many others videos, I have to turn up my vol high

  • @midamalait5194
    @midamalait5194 Рік тому

    I loved this content,for me i've meet this man tru app,and he's a divorce we continue messaging ,we lived here in italy but he live in Sardegna and I live in Rome and its quite hard to meet ,cos what I want He will be the one to meet me up,and by the time goes,i will go there in His place, i really wanted a serious relationship to this man but we never met,serious relatioship what I wanted to mean esclusively us,but how can i trust Him,....i've met him tru app 4 months ago ...

  • @ellengrace4609
    @ellengrace4609 Рік тому +1

    9:12 This is a gold nugget right here!

  • @stormiehaworth
    @stormiehaworth Рік тому

    🖤

  • @medinaseaborn2227
    @medinaseaborn2227 Рік тому

    OMG!!!! More commitment? It's not commitment, you're either committed, not. Is it more like, 'I want him to be in my back pocket-style relationship'. Totally devoted, Luke the guy is oy existing to love you???? Sounds a bit on the possessive border.

    • @JonathonAslay
      @JonathonAslay  Рік тому +1

      How so?

    • @medinaseaborn2227
      @medinaseaborn2227 Рік тому

      Lol, the feminine ideal of committed, I'm generalising, the guy is totally besotted with her and will do anything she asks. But when he needs his space to breathe a bit, she sees that as a failure of committment

    • @medinaseaborn2227
      @medinaseaborn2227 Рік тому

      It works both ways, I've been on the receiving end of 'commitment' driven men. Its my personal experience which has been twisted and bent into an unrealistic example. You can't be'more' committed to something, you're either committed or not. Example, you can't get 'more pregnant' with a baby, you either pregnant or you're not 😂 hahaha

  • @robinemery
    @robinemery Рік тому

    Always such great advice BIG BIG HUGGS 🫂♥️

  • @heathermj3620
    @heathermj3620 Рік тому

    THIS IS SOOOO GOOD JONATHAN!!! Thank you!!!!❤ (((HUG)))

  • @stormiehaworth
    @stormiehaworth Рік тому

    I think i need a discovery call 🤦🏻‍♀️ @jonathinanslay