I don’t have a kid yet. I don’t live in the UK. I enjoy dance but have no personal interest in learning ballet myself. But I’m here anyway because I’m an oldie but goldie 😂 I’m sure so many caregivers will appreciate your honesty in this Louise!
I grew up doing ballet in a satellite Royal Ballet program. I loved it when I was younger, but once I started going through puberty and becoming more muscular from athletics, my ballet teacher was no longer satisfied with my figure. My mum was very supportive and the second I said I didn’t want to do it anymore she let me stop, rather than forcing me to to keep going since I had already dedicated 10 years to it and had become quite successful. I now know my mum had put thousand of pounds into my ballet (and we definitely didn’t come from a fountain of wealth). I wish ballet could have been more financially accessible as everyone else in the class was very silver spoon and cut throat because of the costs. Ballet is a beautiful dance that really helped my physical development when I was young, but becomes very toxic around 12 years old. I’m glad Darcy and Pearl are enjoying ballet. As I said, I loved it, and if track hadn’t become my passion I probably would have stuck at it. Good luck girls! Keep following your passions ❤
Hello! I was a professional dancer, not ballet but Irish, and I wanted to leave some of my perspective on body image. It’s true things are slowly getting better, but both within the professional world and within competitions I believe there is a heavy bias towards leaner dancers. I’ve been told to lose weight in order to succeed and I hated the way I looked when I was dancing. I was convinced losing weight would make me more elegant. I wasn’t overweight but I was quite chunky and muscular as a teenager and unfortunately I found my competition results and auditions went far better after I lost weight. Food and weight was an obsession all through my early adult life as I felt that I needed to be as lean as I could or it would hinder my dancing, which was my passion! I only felt like I fit in when I was lean or considered myself to be lean. When you are cast in a troupe they often want uniformity, and when the standard body within the dance world is lean, if you want to be cast in a show that’s often what you have to be. Even at a simpler level with kids and non-professionals, finding dance shoes when you’re tall and have bigger feet can be very difficult, leotards, tights, etc. often cater to thin and mid sized dancers, second hand costumes are more difficult to find if you’re bigger! There are so many little things that push larger dancers out of the sport from the word go as you never truly feel like you fit in or can flourish the way you are, and that creates a cycle where often the only ones who succeed and reach those higher levels are the lean, white, dancer archetype. My only advice to any parents of young dancers reading this is to celebrate their dancing the way it is. In the competition world we are always looking for ways to improve and how we can make our dancing better, to the point where it can become incredibly self deprecating and impact our self worth when we tie our passion to a competition result. I teach now since retiring from troupe dancing and always try to put an emphasis on the joy dancing brings, not the results or the standard each dancer is at! Thank you for this video, it was really valuable to hear a parents perspective x
omg me too... i come back here now and again, and everytime i say to myself "aloha sprinklarinos" hahahh its like coming back to safe and nostalgic place Louise is the same, but at the same time everything is different in a good way I was around when Darcy was a baby ...its amazing to see the lovely and gifted child that she is Although I am not as an avid viewer as I used to be back in 2013, I hold a special place in my heart for Louise and I try to keep up with whats going around here xx
Thank you for sharing Louise! I got a little bit emotional when you talked about how mentally relaxed Darcy is when dancing. I was such an anxious child, so when I hear that a child has good mental health it brings me so much joy 😊
I hated the vibes of “sports” as a little girl, but ballet gave me a safe space to grow strong and flexible. Everything I know about how my body works- muscles, posture, balance, etc - comes from ballet.
Love this video 🥰🙌🏼 I think it’s also important to note that ‘plus size’ people can still be very physically fit and healthy, people have different bodies and carry weight differently - two people with the same level of fitness will always look completely different. I hope that we’re moving in the direction of celebrating all bodies in the industry for their beautiful dancing, rather than a very narrow window of aesthetic to fit into ❤
In last weeks vlog when Darcy came out of that dance class the joy on her face says it all As a mum you know when a change needs to happen x hope she continues to enjoy it 💐👍
I’m 18 now, I grew up doing 2-3 hours of ballet a week. I am so lucky I went to a small Russian ballet style school in south east England, and we had fun as well as taking exams, no one had pressure to ever do it more than as a hobby, and for me that was perfect. All of us just have a wonderful time in our ballet loving no pressure community. I have a more broader sporty body type as I do a range of other sports and I’m very glad I never tried to do dance competitions. Thank you for such a calm informative video!
Such a lovely caring and careful chat around the subject. Looking forward to body neutrality and variety to come to dance. Yours girls are lucky to have you watching over them and giving them space to just enjoy what they want to enjoy. She’s lucky to have had the opportunities you have given her and I know Darcy really appreciates them! I love watching her excitement and that Pearl loves it her own capacity!
Well done Darcy an incredible achievement!!!!! My mum was a ballerina she is 70 now but watched this and went to the RB and said the prices haven’t really changed. I will warn you Louise my Mum’s feet after performances 😷 yucckkk the point shoes still creep me out heaveeee and now her feet and ankles crack so loudly. But I couldn’t be more proud of my mum she fully retired at 50 and adored every minute. Also congratulations to you on being an amazing mum and getting her to this point 🎉
Choosing a good dance school is greatly important. As someone who has grown up in a toxic dance school with very tough teachers, it really impacted my self confidence in my teenage years. As you get older, having supportive dance teachers are vital in your development as a dancer and as a person. I remember getting shouted at all the time and my teacher even said "I can either make you laugh or make you cry, you choose" 😂 it definitely taught me to be resilient that's for sure!
Hello, just to say that I loved this video and congratulations on being so sensitive with your wording as I know I can be hard when addressing sensitive topics. As a young woman who has been dancing since I was 3 years old mainly in ballet but in lots of other styles as well and has gone into teaching dance I have personally dealt with the body issues, competitiveness and the cliques that form within dance schools. Despite never feeling pressure from my mum about a ‘ballet body’ it was heavily in the media and socials whenever consuming dance related content. I grew up being very slim and small height wise but when I started getting older and growing into a woman 😅 I struggled with body image and still working hard on reversing that. As a teacher, it doesn’t cross my mind to think about the childrens weight and I’m passionate on changing the perception that you can only be a good dancer if you fit the stereotypical weight. I loved hearing that Darcy is already feeling the mental benefits of dance as most uneducated people only link dance to the physical benefits. There are very little studies proving the mental benefits but new articles are appearing at how much dance can help mental health such as depression, anxiety, dementia ect. This is something I’m also passionate about, to be able to create awareness that dance has so many mental benefits and that’s what we should be focusing on, whether you want to become a professional dancer or you just need a little cheer up and dance around your kitchen!!! I could go on and on 😅 Congratulations again on being aware of the stigma around dance and creating a positive environment for your girls to grow their passion ❤
I'm writing my dissertation body image issues within the dance industry. I think you're outlook as a mom being aware of this for your daughter is the most amazing thing ever and I will do the same with my children. I hope you don't mind me quoting some of your words in my dissertation to help discuss how the dance industry needs to change form current issue surrounding body image . Love your videos thank you Louise! xxxx
I am the same - one of my diss modules is in professional resilience and I will be covering food and nutrition in the performing world. I would also like to reference Louise at some points
Louise you are so well spoken! I loved hearing your perspective on things! I teach dance in a small city in Canada. Darcy seems like she really enjoys ballet. Lovely video! 💕
As a professional dancer and now teacher body image is still largely central to dancing especially in ballet unfortunately. Growing up body image was not talked about/ a part of my lessons at my local dance school. However as part of associate schemes as a preteen turning teen, body composition and body image was a major part of grading and auditions for the top schools. The ideal body type was often talked about and encouraged. Having gone to a main dance college post the age of 18 I felt body image was not directly talked about as such but more hinted at in talks about food and staying “in shape”. Also as others mentioned spending everyday 9 to 5 staring in the mirror being self critical and searching for perfection in every way definitely took its toll. I never struggled with disordered eating but was surrounded everyday by others who were which was hard . I have found a great love for contemporary dance which is less focussed on body composition in comparison to ballet. As a teacher now I only ever promote self confidence and body positivity as everyone is individual and even if everyone ate the same and exercised the same everyday we would still all be different. I hope the dance world is becoming more inclusive and less focussed on body image as dancing is a passion and is art so it should be enjoyed by everyone and inclusive to all 🥰
I'm not a dancer myself, but my closest friends growing up were. One went on to pursue ballet as a career, but she unfortunately was turned down from multiple jobs due to her weight/body shape. However, these were larger companies in the northeastern US so hopefully things are changing more quickly in other areas! My friend has now transitioned to contemporary dance and has found the companies much more accepting. Thank you for this lovely, informative video ❤️
I have grew up in dance and now teach dance. I have always been in the most friendly and recreational school that never comments on any child’s body. That being said as a dancer you stare at yourself in the mirror all day, with the intention to watch yourself. As a result it becomes something that a lot become very conscious of their appearance at some point.I think the best you can do as a mum is keep that open conversation and try to keep them in environments that don’t dwell on it, as those school do exist.
yes, agree with this! even if comments aren’t being made, or aren’t being made often, looking at yourself for so long in the mirror can trigger some thoughts and comparisons that might take a toll on your self image.
Wonderful chat, thank you for being so open and considered.❤️ I danced from 10-16 yrs and loved ballet so so much. I had a lovely dance school and teacher, with weight never being discussed. Looking back I think body image impacts were much much less overt. A comment about the shape of my hips 'so square!' from a seamstress, standing in a line of other dancers and naturally comparing our shapes. I think it could have happened in any sport/hobby where your body is your tool, but because dance is a visual aesthetic it's difficult to ignore, especially as girls with so much of the same messages in society to be a certain shape. In the end I'm glad my mum supported my dancing, and I'm glad I enjoyed it so much, even with the body image impacts.
‘Body Happy Kids’ by Molly Forbes is an amazing book for parents or anyone who spends time around kids. As is Laura Thomas’s book ‘just eat it’. There is NO one healthy weight range for any hight (which I’m glad you touched on) BMI has a really dodgy history which is really interrogated in Sabrina String’s ‘Fearing the Black Body’. Bad grammar as I’m holding a wriggly baby!
This was such a great video. I have no kids and no interest in dance, but I love how passionate you are as a family and I’m cheerleading for both your girls shining bright ❤💃🏻🩰
I did ballet for over 10 years but as puberty happened I began to notice differences in my body to the other girls in my classes and I definitely felt singled out by my teacher because of it. I chose to leave because I felt my mental health suffering at such a young age even though I absolutely loved ballet and I loved being with my friends but unfortunately some changes I couldn’t control got in the way. I’m so glad that people are having positive experiences though and hopefully the industry are becoming more accepting of ‘bigger’ ballet dancers. (:
I think the positive benefits from dance far outweigh the negatives . People learn skills in performing, confidence, presentation also the fitness/anatomy side. How to perform under pressure. Creativity and having fun w that side . So many positives ❤
As someone who got into line dancing at 6 years old and then went on to do a myriad of other styles (then had to give up for surgery) and have finally gone back to line dancing as an adult, I would say being in a dance school as a kid really helped me. I did compete (I never won) but the team feeling and the glitz and glamour was just something I loved, as well as shows and displays. As an adult I competed my first local dance comp in about 16 years in Sept last year and have entered the Euros this April. I love it just as much now (at 33) as I did then. Am I an amazing dancer, no, but what always spurred me on was the ability that dance has to allow you to lose and find yourself at the same time, and as Darcy has already identified it had such a positive impact on my mental health. It’s my happy place and if I hadn’t have been part of that community as a child I don’t think I would have been confident enough to walk back in 2 years ago, knowing no one, but knowing that is what I needed in my life to feel fulfilled.
I’m amazed by the cost of dance classes compared to what we pay here in CA! My daughter does jazz, takes two hour-long classes a week and a half-hour long rehearsal. Our monthly class fee for all three is $190! Costumes, ordered from a catalog, are $60-70. Competition fees are $50-ish for a group dance, $150 for kids who want to do solos.
Agreed here.. My daughter does ballet at a Pre-pro ballet academy. Currently taking 3 times a week classes , 90 minutes each. Plus on Monday, she takes one hour extra class with the next level class. This costs: $407 monthly + $100 for the extra one hour Monday classes. Performance (twice a year) + costumes included, though. But, if she is invited to do competitions (like, YAGP), there will be more $$$ to it. 😆 Just like Dina, I’m amazed by the cost you mentioned in the video, Louise!
I double checked the pound to dollar exchange rate upon her figures. We do one 30 minute class per week and it’s $10. That’s all we do, but for the price or less I’d get twice as much in the UK.
In addition to dance lessons, I was on the school dance team for 4 years. We had girls of many body types & sizes, including plus sizes, and they kept up with all the other girls on the team. With practice, your endurance improves, and even if your body doesn’t turn into a tiny body, you will not fall behind because you have the same practice & skills 👍 that’s at least what I always saw. Nobody made comments about someone’s body to them,either, neither dancers nor coaches/teachers. I only know about the dance world in the community I grew up in, but hopefully that’s true in most places if not all!
I am so glad Darcy is still at the stage of just loving it! I did ballet for 13 years (age 5-13) but knew I never wanted to go professional. The studio I went to was known for making professional dancers, and the teachers were super experienced, but after about age 11 definitely held everyone to the same standard even if you weren't wanting to go professional. I had comments made such as that I needed to buy new arms. At least half of my class at that point are now in the national ballet company. When I was 15 I finally had enough and switched to another studio that was more open to all types of dancers, and more aware that the majority weren't going to make it a career, and the last three years were so much more enjoyable. I wish I would have switched earlier! Anyway all that to say I think it really is the teenage years where comments start to be made more freely, but I feel like you will keep communication so open with Darcy (and Pearl) that I know you'll be looking out for them. Don't be afraid to switch schools or anything when the kids are older if they are no longer feeling the same love, as sometimes it is just the environment that is stealing that rather than them actually not liking it anymore. Also even if they are lucky enough to have teachers through teen years who don't make any comments, it is still tough spending those hours looking at yourself in a mirror etc so please continue to keep the positive conversations going with them as they get older!
I did Ballet from the ages of 3 to 18 and I loved it so much! I had my first major experience/realisation surrounding body image around the age of 10 when I auditioned for a ballet company which I unfortunately didn't get into. I vividly remember being spoken to by one of the main teachers who told everyone that didn't get through the audition that the reason why some of us might not have got into the company wasn't because our dancing wasn't good enough instead it might have been because we "didn't have the right image or look"....
I grew up dancing... I did 30hrs a week of classes and teaching... I was about to enroll in Royal Ballet School and then I became ill and had to stop... Broke my heart! I was very poorly for 10 years and when I was finally recovering it was too late for me... I have long lasting disabilities and can't dance the way I used to 😔 I do miss it so much and cherish all the memories I have! I just wished there were more classes and events back when I danced... It just wasn't quite as deep of a rabbit hole back then 💚
Dance was my great love growing up, and it is still now in a different way. I moved towards contemporary because I somehow came not to feel the right shape for a ballet dancer, and also that it was somehow working against my own body to practice it - bunions from feet crushed in pointe shoes, wasn't stretchy enough, legs too fleshy... In the contemporary classes I suddenly felt free. It was still physically challenging, but it was emotionally such a release. As an adult, I've found the expressive outlet in Argentine tango. It's a steep learning curve but an incredible experience to feel connection to someone through movement, and in general a lovely community
This is a really informative video, and I would have loved to see something like this when I was a young and insecure plus size teen, but I think it's important to stress that plus size bodies don't implicitly come with health issues. You did say that every body is different etc, but there's a huge stereotype surround plus size bodies being a burden on the NHS etc when that just isn't true for most of the plus size population. The data "proving" that larger bodies suffer from more health issues due to their weight is actually very skewed due to how often doctors will overlook and ignore issues, instead telling the patient to "just lose weight" despite the weight not being the root cause. In fact, I've had joint issues my whole life and have been told to lose weight to put less pressure on the joints. Turns out I just have hypermobile joints, which I was born with, and have even had a doctor say that heavier bodies suffer less hypermobility because the weight of the body holds the joints in place more. Body neutrality is definitely the way forward, however first we must dispel the idea that heavy bodies are inherently less healthy 💗💗
Thank you so much for sharing this! I haven't watched you for years but this stood out to me because I have twin girls in ballet. They're only very young at the moment and ballet is something I've been umming and aaahhhing whether to keep them in because I worry about injuries and the body image issues aswell. This has helped me a bit thanks alot.
Very well spoken and researched :) I think the challenges for girls with eating come with puberty if they dance or not. Best protection is that they are happy so they are much more at risk if they sit at home and don’t feel good or don’t exercise. Also mums who have the best intentions should still be aware of the pressure even if everyone’s enjoys it. As long as they can have other interests too and it’s not all about competition it’s probably okay.
24 year old with a degree in dance here. I trained professionally at degree level in contemporary dance in the UK and I have to say the experience was so incredibly positive with no push or focus on body image or a push to be ‘smaller’ from our teachers. (In fact there was never any mention of peoples weight at all) I know there are still some education providers who make students stand in their underwear and be weighed regularly but this is now a small minority. (And certainly not a place I would be comfortable training in) The good news is you can easily figure out which ones are more positive and which ones may contain harmful behaviours when making a decision to study dance further and there are definitely very very great places to study out there should this be anyone’s interest or concern. Love seeing the journey you and your girls are going through with dance ❤❤
My daughter (with special needs) did ballet and loved it, all our experiences were good. I myself 50 years ago did ballet and also enjoyed my years there, no nastiness at all.
I am a professional ballet dancer. I grew up in the U.K. started at my local school, went to a slightly more “established school” and then went to a vocational ballet school. I have now been working abroad professionally for nine years and toured the U.K. toured to Mexico, even South Korea!! And I am so so grateful to my parents for every penny they put towards that because we didn’t have a vast abundance when we were young! I do have to say I never participated in dance competitions though I think that isn’t necessarily important to training! Although some children might simply love that side of it I guess!
i love that u made this video, to show that dance also has its issues and it can cost a lot. im very glad to hear darcy has not had to encounter any of those weight/body image issues that the dance field can sometimes have and that you're all enjoying it fine :))
I'm a singer (deffo not a dancer!!) and bar the body image it's deffo v similar w £ and intensity levels! I could spend £££ on residential courses but equally could excell through just a weekly choir! ☺️ I’ve worked my way up to sing at the ROH and seriously admire the ballerinas there ❤️
In terms of body image it very much depends on who they are around and the people they are exposed to. My dance school was A* on supporting positive body image but a chaperone mum really really wasn't (and consequently her kids also repeated negative things about bodies). My home was super positive but to the point that my mum just said that anything others said that upset me was just 'silly' which obviously seems good but it didn't actually equip me to unpick why those things weren't correct etc. So who people are exposed to plus information and ways to respond to negativity is key in my opinion!
I don’t have a child but grew up dancing, just adore your honesty and open view on so many topics even if not at current or ever r related to me personally. You are a fantastic mum, two blessed little girls. Only dream to be half the mum you are 💛
You discussed this with so much grace and elegance. My son and daughter both dance, my daughter competitively and we've had nothing but a positive experience.
This is a really balanced video. As a child who loved to Dance but never wanted it to be a career my family were very similar to you. Supportive, if we had the funds I was lucky enough to go away to dance and performance weeks etc but never took it any further and I wouldn’t change a thing
My daughter started dance relatively late at the age of 13 as prior to that she was a swimmer but decided competitive swimming wasn’t for her. We started of with performing arts and street, then she went on to grade work in tap, modern, contemporary and Acro. After school she went to college to take a BTEC course in dance plus her DDI. Four years ago she qualified as a acro teacher and now teaches children from Pearl’s age to seniors as well as tap, modern and musical theatre.
I’ve been severing Anorexic for the past 35 years now ( as I’m 50 years old ) and watching and engaging in skinny competition and being bullied from infant school right up until my first ever job was obviously extremely painful so Please keep an eye out on your beautiful two daughters ( and I definitely don’t want to sound condersending in ANY WAY shape or form ) but I MOST DEFINITELY Would NOT EVER want them to suffer in silence like I have had to do Louise Xxx
My girls 4 and 6 are starting ballet this weekend, my eldest did it just before covid when she was under 3 but nothing since and I'm so excited for them! 💖
I just wanna point out that that rolling scale of a healthy weight is very dependent person to person. Height isn’t the only thing that goes into calculating a healthy weight and that’s why the BMI scale to measure health is so inaccurate. But that being said Darcy loves to dance and is great at it and that’s a beautiful thing. You’re doing all the right things to avoid all the potential body image issues. ❤
Hi, Louisexx. Recently, BBC Radio 4's "The Food Programme" did an episode on ballet dancers and nutrition and what the industry's doing to help folks keep healthyxx.
My sister is currently dealing with some really terribly behaved dance moms. My niece has some health conditions that have caused her to be physically ‘behind’ kids her age but she LOVES dance and does her best. Some of the kids will flat out say ‘I can do that better than her’ and the parents just laugh it off as the kids joking. The moms tend to be clicky and will only include you if it’s beneficial for them. They shut you out, talk behind your back etc etc and it’s not everyone it’s just like a group of 4. I’m glad Darcy and pearl have found a good place to dance. I love seeing the little glimpses of Darcy doing ballet.
I wasn't in competitive dance, but I did have dance classes from age 5 to 14. When I was 12 I went to an interstate week-long BBO training camp. I already had developed restrictive eating problems before arriving. In one class at the camp, a well respected teacher asked me to come forward before explaining to a group of 40 students that they should always walk with pressure on the front of their feet, so they don't develop "big thigh muscles" like mine. The woman didn't bat an eye saying this. I quit a decade ago but the impact of ballet's narrow aesthetic standards and body-focussed culture are hard to shake to this day..
in all honesty, im so glad i was a dancer when i was because these days it seems so much more competitive than it used to be, its scary! i started dancing in 2003 in tap, modern jazz, ballet, lyrical and acrobatics and competed from then until 2016.. i then had a break from competing until 2019 and when i went back it was a whole different world!!! the competitiveness between schools was insane! and back in the days body image in dancers wasnt really that big a deal (that i noticed anyway) also the costumes are soooo much more expensive these days, yes they are also a whole lot nicer than they used to be but ya know 😂 i was on track to become a professional dancer, i completed my A Level and BTEC College Dance Course, got accepted into 7 different dance universities/vocational schools but then got injured 😢 i was absolutely devastated but everything happens for a reason because i am now a childrens ballet teacher and its the best job in the world ❤
I am glad your daughters are having what you know to be a positive experience. My mum was a professional dancer when she was younger and there was a lot around body image, but it's definitely getting better. It needs changing I don't think anyone should be required to be unhealthy to take up a sports hobby or anything for that matter. even if Darcy did want to go into higher professional dancing I think it's just the case of watching as a parent that you don't notice worrying changes such as restrictive eating dance and any sport is about enjoyment and keeping fit and healththat'ss what matters Xx
Would be really interested to hear your thoughts on the impact of the competitiveness for children - I danced throughout my childhood and on one occasion was the only one in my competition team to not win a medal. Thankfully my parents always emphasised how the most important thing was if I was enjoying it (which I was) but I can see how this could potentially impact a child negatively. Really interesting video though!
I'm 19 and training in Musical Theatre in hopes of ending up on the West End. Having not had much of a dance background and suddenly being in ballet and jazz classes, the issue of my own body image has never been more apparent. I'm a bigger person, curvier and taller than most in the class and being in a leotard was quite damaging for my mental health at first. Thankfully, the industry is moving forward, but the pace is slow and I am constantly aware that the way I look affects my likability and ability to get jobs.
I would love to know more about the sustainablity of dance. As children are growing all the time and ballet shoes etc get used and replaced regularly how doyou find it in terms of environmental impact? Is there options to recycle or donate items, or mend? You talked briefly about buying second hand. Love watching your videos and have done for 10 years now x
Great question! It's not something I'm very qualified to answer because I haven't had to deal with it yet - I pass all of Darcy's things down to Pearl! So, I'll leave you to independently research that one but I'm interested to hear what you find out if you do! xxx
I think my favourite thing about score-based competitive activities (dance, cheerleading, gymnastics etc) is that even though you're "against" other people, it's not direct competition. Your goal is not to beat someone else, your goal is to do your competitive element to the best of your ability and to achieve the best score you can - it's not you Vs them, it's you vs your scoresheet so it's a great way to be competitive without putting other people down. (Coming from an adult who has competed in cheerleading for 8 years)
The only way I could dance as a kid was at my community centre because I couldn't afford the bus. It was 50p a week (I'm only 20 lol I must sound like 50 but I grew up in a pit village). I was really good at ballet and one of the teachers started getting the bus with me to the sports centre and let me join in on her proper classes for free. Sadly when I was 10 or 11 my grandad got sick and I had to help take care of him in my spare time instead, but dancing is a real privilege and I'm so glad I got to try it
I stopped ballet at 14 when the pressure to do more lessons became more intense. I definitely developed an eating disorder which I cannot say was bought on by ballet itself, but the environment definitely made it worse. Although I don’t remember many instances of body image or weight being talked about, watching all the parts going to the most slender dancers and comparing yourself to the others in your class I think is more where the damage can start
My daughter attended a dance school for years , fortunately it had many types of dance so if a child was happier in hip hop, step, ballroom etc. they could find what made them happy , discover their niche or just enjoy multiple styles. She discovered competitive paddling, canoe and kayak and that sort of ended dance but it was her choice. As an adult she still paddles in regattas at least once a year because she just loves it. My Mum drove me an hour away every Saturday to a dance school so I could take ballet but I preferred tap , much to her disgust🤣😂 it only lasted a couple of Good luck with the girls dance. 🥰🙋🏼♀️
As an ex dancer (danced as a kid) I was told that I wasn’t good enough for ballet because of my lack of gross motor skills. I would like to try again as an adult but that comment I heard as a kid has really put me off 😅
I have always wanted to be a ballerina when I was a kid. Up until 15 y.o.. But growing up in the village the only public place we had is the only secondary school lol.
I think most community dance schools are trying to be better about the weight thing. I’m sure there’s some bad eggs out there but I think if you find a good community dance school, they understand that’s it’s for fun and fitness. Once you get to full time dance student or working it can change quite drastically
As a child took ballet and tap lessons. Truly enjoyed it but not so much all the practice. Interesting because my particular teacher had blatant favorites in class and with teaching which reflected in theor teaching. Looking for links that you mentioned. Where are they?
altho, i was just doing lessons and grade exams for 10 years (without competitions/shows etc) - maybe darcy's ballet scene had more of this involvement, meaning they reduced the lesson prices?👍
My daughter danced for years she loved it but the girls that could pay for all the extra lessons always got more chances . We could only afford the basic lessons enough said !
I'm plus size and I think body positivity has reached a level of stupidity. Can you have a short basketball player ? How can you be overweight and dance on your toes or be lifted and flipped. Let us plz be sensible in addition to being sensitive.
basketball’s not really a fair comparison since the net must be a standard height. and shorter gymnasts succeed because it’s just less mass to flip around. but not all dance is in pointe shoes, and ultimately dance is an expressive art form that is open to all. not all dancers have professional goals. not everyone wants to do partnered dancing with lifts. and at this point, body positivity in the dance world is not even close to approaching overweight people-we’re still talking about small to medium sized. the issue with perspectives like yours is that it discourages people from finding a form of healthy exercise (for mind and body). my plus sized friend hears hateful comments while she’s literally working out at the gym-so what exactly is she supposed to do?!
As an outsider to the dance world, I’ve always perceived it as a toxic environment and would be very cautious if my child wanted to partake. I think the body image issues and general culture makes it a no-go for me personally
I can understand why you'd have those boundaries but I'd encourage you not to make something a 'no go' until you've tried it a little bit. You might, like me, find it a very positive environment xxx
Does Darcy know/appreciate/understand how much you spend on her passion or is that a conversation for when she is older? Also I think you may have not experienced negative body issues with the girls as they are slim so therefore what's expected. I was healthy but a bit rounder as a child still within healthy limits just held it differently and had a negative opinion said to me about my body at age 8. Never told my parents so good to have a conversation and if they hear anything being said to anyone else too.
Aloha Louise!! Great video, watching as an ex performer, ballet lover and teacher 💕🩰 Louise have you heard of English Youth Ballet? 🩰✨ there is a Norwich SWAN LAKE audition coming up!!! My love of ballet grew and grew through English Youth Ballet, couldn't recommend more highly 💖 I performed in 4 full length ballets from the age of 8 to 16 with them, learnt and loved so much. Very different approach to Royal Ballet, London Children's Ballet etc. Audition for Norwich is 22 March! it's almost meant to be ✨🥺🩰🦢
I don’t have a kid yet. I don’t live in the UK. I enjoy dance but have no personal interest in learning ballet myself. But I’m here anyway because I’m an oldie but goldie 😂 I’m sure so many caregivers will appreciate your honesty in this Louise!
Ahhh thank you Anjali! Sending you 99 glitter points xxx
Same 💕
I grew up doing ballet in a satellite Royal Ballet program. I loved it when I was younger, but once I started going through puberty and becoming more muscular from athletics, my ballet teacher was no longer satisfied with my figure. My mum was very supportive and the second I said I didn’t want to do it anymore she let me stop, rather than forcing me to to keep going since I had already dedicated 10 years to it and had become quite successful. I now know my mum had put thousand of pounds into my ballet (and we definitely didn’t come from a fountain of wealth). I wish ballet could have been more financially accessible as everyone else in the class was very silver spoon and cut throat because of the costs.
Ballet is a beautiful dance that really helped my physical development when I was young, but becomes very toxic around 12 years old.
I’m glad Darcy and Pearl are enjoying ballet. As I said, I loved it, and if track hadn’t become my passion I probably would have stuck at it. Good luck girls! Keep following your passions ❤
Your Mum sounds like a good woman xxx
Hello! I was a professional dancer, not ballet but Irish, and I wanted to leave some of my perspective on body image. It’s true things are slowly getting better, but both within the professional world and within competitions I believe there is a heavy bias towards leaner dancers. I’ve been told to lose weight in order to succeed and I hated the way I looked when I was dancing. I was convinced losing weight would make me more elegant. I wasn’t overweight but I was quite chunky and muscular as a teenager and unfortunately I found my competition results and auditions went far better after I lost weight. Food and weight was an obsession all through my early adult life as I felt that I needed to be as lean as I could or it would hinder my dancing, which was my passion! I only felt like I fit in when I was lean or considered myself to be lean. When you are cast in a troupe they often want uniformity, and when the standard body within the dance world is lean, if you want to be cast in a show that’s often what you have to be. Even at a simpler level with kids and non-professionals, finding dance shoes when you’re tall and have bigger feet can be very difficult, leotards, tights, etc. often cater to thin and mid sized dancers, second hand costumes are more difficult to find if you’re bigger! There are so many little things that push larger dancers out of the sport from the word go as you never truly feel like you fit in or can flourish the way you are, and that creates a cycle where often the only ones who succeed and reach those higher levels are the lean, white, dancer archetype. My only advice to any parents of young dancers reading this is to celebrate their dancing the way it is. In the competition world we are always looking for ways to improve and how we can make our dancing better, to the point where it can become incredibly self deprecating and impact our self worth when we tie our passion to a competition result. I teach now since retiring from troupe dancing and always try to put an emphasis on the joy dancing brings, not the results or the standard each dancer is at! Thank you for this video, it was really valuable to hear a parents perspective x
Your comment is so articulate and informative, thank you!
I haven’t watched a sit down Louise video for so long that I fully expected this to open with “aloha sprinklarinos” and I think that says a lot 😅
Welcome back xxx
omg me too...
i come back here now and again, and everytime i say to myself "aloha sprinklarinos" hahahh its like coming back to safe and nostalgic place
Louise is the same, but at the same time everything is different in a good way
I was around when Darcy was a baby ...its amazing to see the lovely and gifted child that she is
Although I am not as an avid viewer as I used to be back in 2013, I hold a special place in my heart for Louise and I try to keep up with whats going around here
xx
Thank you for sharing Louise! I got a little bit emotional when you talked about how mentally relaxed Darcy is when dancing. I was such an anxious child, so when I hear that a child has good mental health it brings me so much joy 😊
I hated the vibes of “sports” as a little girl, but ballet gave me a safe space to grow strong and flexible. Everything I know about how my body works- muscles, posture, balance, etc - comes from ballet.
Me, who doesn't care about dance in the slightest: ooh! I can't wait to watch Louise's new dance video 😀😆
Love this video 🥰🙌🏼
I think it’s also important to note that ‘plus size’ people can still be very physically fit and healthy, people have different bodies and carry weight differently - two people with the same level of fitness will always look completely different. I hope that we’re moving in the direction of celebrating all bodies in the industry for their beautiful dancing, rather than a very narrow window of aesthetic to fit into ❤
In last weeks vlog when Darcy came out of that dance class the joy on her face says it all
As a mum you know when a change needs to happen x hope she continues to enjoy it 💐👍
Exactly this. When the fun stops, we stop xxx
I’m 18 now, I grew up doing 2-3 hours of ballet a week. I am so lucky I went to a small Russian ballet style school in south east England, and we had fun as well as taking exams, no one had pressure to ever do it more than as a hobby, and for me that was perfect. All of us just have a wonderful time in our ballet loving no pressure community. I have a more broader sporty body type as I do a range of other sports and I’m very glad I never tried to do dance competitions. Thank you for such a calm informative video!
Such a lovely caring and careful chat around the subject. Looking forward to body neutrality and variety to come to dance. Yours girls are lucky to have you watching over them and giving them space to just enjoy what they want to enjoy. She’s lucky to have had the opportunities you have given her and I know Darcy really appreciates them! I love watching her excitement and that Pearl loves it her own capacity!
Well done Darcy an incredible achievement!!!!! My mum was a ballerina she is 70 now but watched this and went to the RB and said the prices haven’t really changed. I will warn you Louise my Mum’s feet after performances 😷 yucckkk the point shoes still creep me out heaveeee and now her feet and ankles crack so loudly. But I couldn’t be more proud of my mum she fully retired at 50 and adored every minute. Also congratulations to you on being an amazing mum and getting her to this point 🎉
Choosing a good dance school is greatly important. As someone who has grown up in a toxic dance school with very tough teachers, it really impacted my self confidence in my teenage years. As you get older, having supportive dance teachers are vital in your development as a dancer and as a person. I remember getting shouted at all the time and my teacher even said "I can either make you laugh or make you cry, you choose" 😂 it definitely taught me to be resilient that's for sure!
Hello, just to say that I loved this video and congratulations on being so sensitive with your wording as I know I can be hard when addressing sensitive topics. As a young woman who has been dancing since I was 3 years old mainly in ballet but in lots of other styles as well and has gone into teaching dance I have personally dealt with the body issues, competitiveness and the cliques that form within dance schools. Despite never feeling pressure from my mum about a ‘ballet body’ it was heavily in the media and socials whenever consuming dance related content. I grew up being very slim and small height wise but when I started getting older and growing into a woman 😅 I struggled with body image and still working hard on reversing that. As a teacher, it doesn’t cross my mind to think about the childrens weight and I’m passionate on changing the perception that you can only be a good dancer if you fit the stereotypical weight. I loved hearing that Darcy is already feeling the mental benefits of dance as most uneducated people only link dance to the physical benefits. There are very little studies proving the mental benefits but new articles are appearing at how much dance can help mental health such as depression, anxiety, dementia ect. This is something I’m also passionate about, to be able to create awareness that dance has so many mental benefits and that’s what we should be focusing on, whether you want to become a professional dancer or you just need a little cheer up and dance around your kitchen!!! I could go on and on 😅
Congratulations again on being aware of the stigma around dance and creating a positive environment for your girls to grow their passion ❤
Wow, you navigated such a tricky topic with great grace and clarity! Encouraging!!
I'm writing my dissertation body image issues within the dance industry. I think you're outlook as a mom being aware of this for your daughter is the most amazing thing ever and I will do the same with my children. I hope you don't mind me quoting some of your words in my dissertation to help discuss how the dance industry needs to change form current issue surrounding body image . Love your videos thank you Louise! xxxx
I am the same - one of my diss modules is in professional resilience and I will be covering food and nutrition in the performing world. I would also like to reference Louise at some points
Louise you are so well spoken! I loved hearing your perspective on things! I teach dance in a small city in Canada. Darcy seems like she really enjoys ballet. Lovely video! 💕
As a professional dancer and now teacher body image is still largely central to dancing especially in ballet unfortunately. Growing up body image was not talked about/ a part of my lessons at my local dance school. However as part of associate schemes as a preteen turning teen, body composition and body image was a major part of grading and auditions for the top schools. The ideal body type was often talked about and encouraged. Having gone to a main dance college post the age of 18 I felt body image was not directly talked about as such but more hinted at in talks about food and staying “in shape”. Also as others mentioned spending everyday 9 to 5 staring in the mirror being self critical and searching for perfection in every way definitely took its toll. I never struggled with disordered eating but was surrounded everyday by others who were which was hard . I have found a great love for contemporary dance which is less focussed on body composition in comparison to ballet. As a teacher now I only ever promote self confidence and body positivity as everyone is individual and even if everyone ate the same and exercised the same everyday we would still all be different. I hope the dance world is becoming more inclusive and less focussed on body image as dancing is a passion and is art so it should be enjoyed by everyone and inclusive to all 🥰
Thank you so much for sharing all this Katie. Definitely useful insight for me as I help Darcy navigate the pre-teens! xxx
I'm not a dancer myself, but my closest friends growing up were. One went on to pursue ballet as a career, but she unfortunately was turned down from multiple jobs due to her weight/body shape. However, these were larger companies in the northeastern US so hopefully things are changing more quickly in other areas! My friend has now transitioned to contemporary dance and has found the companies much more accepting. Thank you for this lovely, informative video ❤️
I have grew up in dance and now teach dance. I have always been in the most friendly and recreational school that never comments on any child’s body. That being said as a dancer you stare at yourself in the mirror all day, with the intention to watch yourself. As a result it becomes something that a lot become very conscious of their appearance at some point.I think the best you can do as a mum is keep that open conversation and try to keep them in environments that don’t dwell on it, as those school do exist.
yes, agree with this! even if comments aren’t being made, or aren’t being made often, looking at yourself for so long in the mirror can trigger some thoughts and comparisons that might take a toll on your self image.
Wonderful chat, thank you for being so open and considered.❤️
I danced from 10-16 yrs and loved ballet so so much. I had a lovely dance school and teacher, with weight never being discussed. Looking back I think body image impacts were much much less overt. A comment about the shape of my hips 'so square!' from a seamstress, standing in a line of other dancers and naturally comparing our shapes. I think it could have happened in any sport/hobby where your body is your tool, but because dance is a visual aesthetic it's difficult to ignore, especially as girls with so much of the same messages in society to be a certain shape. In the end I'm glad my mum supported my dancing, and I'm glad I enjoyed it so much, even with the body image impacts.
‘Body Happy Kids’ by Molly Forbes is an amazing book for parents or anyone who spends time around kids. As is Laura Thomas’s book ‘just eat it’. There is NO one healthy weight range for any hight (which I’m glad you touched on) BMI has a really dodgy history which is really interrogated in Sabrina String’s ‘Fearing the Black Body’. Bad grammar as I’m holding a wriggly baby!
This was such a great video. I have no kids and no interest in dance, but I love how passionate you are as a family and I’m cheerleading for both your girls shining bright ❤💃🏻🩰
I did ballet for over 10 years but as puberty happened I began to notice differences in my body to the other girls in my classes and I definitely felt singled out by my teacher because of it. I chose to leave because I felt my mental health suffering at such a young age even though I absolutely loved ballet and I loved being with my friends but unfortunately some changes I couldn’t control got in the way. I’m so glad that people are having positive experiences though and hopefully the industry are becoming more accepting of ‘bigger’ ballet dancers. (:
I have no interest in dance myself but still find it so interesting finding out what it takes / costs for hobbies like this !
I think the positive benefits from dance far outweigh the negatives . People learn skills in performing, confidence, presentation also the fitness/anatomy side. How to perform under pressure. Creativity and having fun w that side . So many positives ❤
As someone who got into line dancing at 6 years old and then went on to do a myriad of other styles (then had to give up for surgery) and have finally gone back to line dancing as an adult, I would say being in a dance school as a kid really helped me. I did compete (I never won) but the team feeling and the glitz and glamour was just something I loved, as well as shows and displays. As an adult I competed my first local dance comp in about 16 years in Sept last year and have entered the Euros this April. I love it just as much now (at 33) as I did then. Am I an amazing dancer, no, but what always spurred me on was the ability that dance has to allow you to lose and find yourself at the same time, and as Darcy has already identified it had such a positive impact on my mental health. It’s my happy place and if I hadn’t have been part of that community as a child I don’t think I would have been confident enough to walk back in 2 years ago, knowing no one, but knowing that is what I needed in my life to feel fulfilled.
I’m amazed by the cost of dance classes compared to what we pay here in CA! My daughter does jazz, takes two hour-long classes a week and a half-hour long rehearsal. Our monthly class fee for all three is $190! Costumes, ordered from a catalog, are $60-70. Competition fees are $50-ish for a group dance, $150 for kids who want to do solos.
Woahhhh!!!!
@@Louisepentland I know!
Agreed here..
My daughter does ballet at a Pre-pro ballet academy. Currently taking 3 times a week classes , 90 minutes each. Plus on Monday, she takes one hour extra class with the next level class.
This costs: $407 monthly + $100 for the extra one hour Monday classes.
Performance (twice a year) + costumes included, though.
But, if she is invited to do competitions (like, YAGP), there will be more $$$ to it. 😆
Just like Dina, I’m amazed by the cost you mentioned in the video, Louise!
For private lessons, it would be $55 per 30 minutes, or $65 per 30 minutes with the artistic director.
I double checked the pound to dollar exchange rate upon her figures. We do one 30 minute class per week and it’s $10. That’s all we do, but for the price or less I’d get twice as much in the UK.
In addition to dance lessons, I was on the school dance team for 4 years. We had girls of many body types & sizes, including plus sizes, and they kept up with all the other girls on the team. With practice, your endurance improves, and even if your body doesn’t turn into a tiny body, you will not fall behind because you have the same practice & skills 👍 that’s at least what I always saw. Nobody made comments about someone’s body to them,either, neither dancers nor coaches/teachers. I only know about the dance world in the community I grew up in, but hopefully that’s true in most places if not all!
I am so glad Darcy is still at the stage of just loving it! I did ballet for 13 years (age 5-13) but knew I never wanted to go professional. The studio I went to was known for making professional dancers, and the teachers were super experienced, but after about age 11 definitely held everyone to the same standard even if you weren't wanting to go professional. I had comments made such as that I needed to buy new arms. At least half of my class at that point are now in the national ballet company. When I was 15 I finally had enough and switched to another studio that was more open to all types of dancers, and more aware that the majority weren't going to make it a career, and the last three years were so much more enjoyable. I wish I would have switched earlier! Anyway all that to say I think it really is the teenage years where comments start to be made more freely, but I feel like you will keep communication so open with Darcy (and Pearl) that I know you'll be looking out for them. Don't be afraid to switch schools or anything when the kids are older if they are no longer feeling the same love, as sometimes it is just the environment that is stealing that rather than them actually not liking it anymore. Also even if they are lucky enough to have teachers through teen years who don't make any comments, it is still tough spending those hours looking at yourself in a mirror etc so please continue to keep the positive conversations going with them as they get older!
I did Ballet from the ages of 3 to 18 and I loved it so much! I had my first major experience/realisation surrounding body image around the age of 10 when I auditioned for a ballet company which I unfortunately didn't get into. I vividly remember being spoken to by one of the main teachers who told everyone that didn't get through the audition that the reason why some of us might not have got into the company wasn't because our dancing wasn't good enough instead it might have been because we "didn't have the right image or look"....
That's messed up
Thank you for the honesty and for this video, so lovely to watch a long one
I grew up dancing... I did 30hrs a week of classes and teaching... I was about to enroll in Royal Ballet School and then I became ill and had to stop... Broke my heart! I was very poorly for 10 years and when I was finally recovering it was too late for me... I have long lasting disabilities and can't dance the way I used to 😔 I do miss it so much and cherish all the memories I have! I just wished there were more classes and events back when I danced... It just wasn't quite as deep of a rabbit hole back then 💚
Dance was my great love growing up, and it is still now in a different way. I moved towards contemporary because I somehow came not to feel the right shape for a ballet dancer, and also that it was somehow working against my own body to practice it - bunions from feet crushed in pointe shoes, wasn't stretchy enough, legs too fleshy... In the contemporary classes I suddenly felt free. It was still physically challenging, but it was emotionally such a release. As an adult, I've found the expressive outlet in Argentine tango. It's a steep learning curve but an incredible experience to feel connection to someone through movement, and in general a lovely community
This is a really informative video, and I would have loved to see something like this when I was a young and insecure plus size teen, but I think it's important to stress that plus size bodies don't implicitly come with health issues. You did say that every body is different etc, but there's a huge stereotype surround plus size bodies being a burden on the NHS etc when that just isn't true for most of the plus size population. The data "proving" that larger bodies suffer from more health issues due to their weight is actually very skewed due to how often doctors will overlook and ignore issues, instead telling the patient to "just lose weight" despite the weight not being the root cause.
In fact, I've had joint issues my whole life and have been told to lose weight to put less pressure on the joints. Turns out I just have hypermobile joints, which I was born with, and have even had a doctor say that heavier bodies suffer less hypermobility because the weight of the body holds the joints in place more.
Body neutrality is definitely the way forward, however first we must dispel the idea that heavy bodies are inherently less healthy 💗💗
What a well-rounded view!❤ so great of you to share your reflected healthy mindset🎉
Good discussion of some tricky topics. Love how you're navigating this for your girls.
You’re so lovely. The way you discuss subjects is just brilliant x
Thank you so much for sharing this! I haven't watched you for years but this stood out to me because I have twin girls in ballet. They're only very young at the moment and ballet is something I've been umming and aaahhhing whether to keep them in because I worry about injuries and the body image issues aswell. This has helped me a bit thanks alot.
Very well spoken and researched :) I think the challenges for girls with eating come with puberty if they dance or not. Best protection is that they are happy so they are much more at risk if they sit at home and don’t feel good or don’t exercise. Also mums who have the best intentions should still be aware of the pressure even if everyone’s enjoys it. As long as they can have other interests too and it’s not all about competition it’s probably okay.
24 year old with a degree in dance here.
I trained professionally at degree level in contemporary dance in the UK and I have to say the experience was so incredibly positive with no push or focus on body image or a push to be ‘smaller’ from our teachers. (In fact there was never any mention of peoples weight at all)
I know there are still some education providers who make students stand in their underwear and be weighed regularly but this is now a small minority. (And certainly not a place I would be comfortable training in)
The good news is you can easily figure out which ones are more positive and which ones may contain harmful behaviours when making a decision to study dance further and there are definitely very very great places to study out there should this be anyone’s interest or concern.
Love seeing the journey you and your girls are going through with dance ❤❤
My daughter (with special needs) did ballet and loved it, all our experiences were good. I myself 50 years ago did ballet and also enjoyed my years there, no nastiness at all.
I am a professional ballet dancer. I grew up in the U.K. started at my local school, went to a slightly more “established school” and then went to a vocational ballet school. I have now been working abroad professionally for nine years and toured the U.K. toured to Mexico, even South Korea!! And I am so so grateful to my parents for every penny they put towards that because we didn’t have a vast abundance when we were young! I do have to say I never participated in dance competitions though I think that isn’t necessarily important to training! Although some children might simply love that side of it I guess!
Thanks for the great video, I really feel illuminated on the subject
i love that u made this video, to show that dance also has its issues and it can cost a lot. im very glad to hear darcy has not had to encounter any of those weight/body image issues that the dance field can sometimes have and that you're all enjoying it fine :))
I'm a singer (deffo not a dancer!!) and bar the body image it's deffo v similar w £ and intensity levels! I could spend £££ on residential courses but equally could excell through just a weekly choir! ☺️ I’ve worked my way up to sing at the ROH and seriously admire the ballerinas there ❤️
In terms of body image it very much depends on who they are around and the people they are exposed to. My dance school was A* on supporting positive body image but a chaperone mum really really wasn't (and consequently her kids also repeated negative things about bodies). My home was super positive but to the point that my mum just said that anything others said that upset me was just 'silly' which obviously seems good but it didn't actually equip me to unpick why those things weren't correct etc. So who people are exposed to plus information and ways to respond to negativity is key in my opinion!
I don’t have a child but grew up dancing, just adore your honesty and open view on so many topics even if not at current or ever r related to me personally. You are a fantastic mum, two blessed little girls. Only dream to be half the mum you are 💛
You discussed this with so much grace and elegance. My son and daughter both dance, my daughter competitively and we've had nothing but a positive experience.
This is a really balanced video. As a child who loved to Dance but never wanted it to be a career my family were very similar to you. Supportive, if we had the funds I was lucky enough to go away to dance and performance weeks etc but never took it any further and I wouldn’t change a thing
My daughter started dance relatively late at the age of 13 as prior to that she was a swimmer but decided competitive swimming wasn’t for her. We started of with performing arts and street, then she went on to grade work in tap, modern, contemporary and Acro. After school she went to college to take a BTEC course in dance plus her DDI. Four years ago she qualified as a acro teacher and now teaches children from Pearl’s age to seniors as well as tap, modern and musical theatre.
I’ve been severing Anorexic for the past 35 years now ( as I’m 50 years old ) and watching and engaging in skinny competition and being bullied from infant school right up until my first ever job was obviously extremely painful so Please keep an eye out on your beautiful two daughters ( and I definitely don’t want to sound condersending in ANY WAY shape or form ) but I MOST DEFINITELY Would NOT EVER want them to suffer in silence like I have had to do Louise Xxx
My girls 4 and 6 are starting ballet this weekend, my eldest did it just before covid when she was under 3 but nothing since and I'm so excited for them! 💖
I just wanna point out that that rolling scale of a healthy weight is very dependent person to person. Height isn’t the only thing that goes into calculating a healthy weight and that’s why the BMI scale to measure health is so inaccurate. But that being said Darcy loves to dance and is great at it and that’s a beautiful thing. You’re doing all the right things to avoid all the potential body image issues. ❤
Hi, Louisexx. Recently, BBC Radio 4's "The Food Programme" did an episode on ballet dancers and nutrition and what the industry's doing to help folks keep healthyxx.
My sister is currently dealing with some really terribly behaved dance moms. My niece has some health conditions that have caused her to be physically ‘behind’ kids her age but she LOVES dance and does her best. Some of the kids will flat out say ‘I can do that better than her’ and the parents just laugh it off as the kids joking. The moms tend to be clicky and will only include you if it’s beneficial for them. They shut you out, talk behind your back etc etc and it’s not everyone it’s just like a group of 4. I’m glad Darcy and pearl have found a good place to dance. I love seeing the little glimpses of Darcy doing ballet.
Wow!! If your sister is local to Northants, send her our way, it's lovely over here, everyone accepted and all welcome xxx
I wasn't in competitive dance, but I did have dance classes from age 5 to 14. When I was 12 I went to an interstate week-long BBO training camp. I already had developed restrictive eating problems before arriving. In one class at the camp, a well respected teacher asked me to come forward before explaining to a group of 40 students that they should always walk with pressure on the front of their feet, so they don't develop "big thigh muscles" like mine. The woman didn't bat an eye saying this. I quit a decade ago but the impact of ballet's narrow aesthetic standards and body-focussed culture are hard to shake to this day..
in all honesty, im so glad i was a dancer when i was because these days it seems so much more competitive than it used to be, its scary! i started dancing in 2003 in tap, modern jazz, ballet, lyrical and acrobatics and competed from then until 2016.. i then had a break from competing until 2019 and when i went back it was a whole different world!!! the competitiveness between schools was insane! and back in the days body image in dancers wasnt really that big a deal (that i noticed anyway) also the costumes are soooo much more expensive these days, yes they are also a whole lot nicer than they used to be but ya know 😂 i was on track to become a professional dancer, i completed my A Level and BTEC College Dance Course, got accepted into 7 different dance universities/vocational schools but then got injured 😢 i was absolutely devastated but everything happens for a reason because i am now a childrens ballet teacher and its the best job in the world ❤
I am glad your daughters are having what you know to be a positive experience.
My mum was a professional dancer when she was younger and there was a lot around body image, but it's definitely getting better. It needs changing I don't think anyone should be required to be unhealthy to take up a sports hobby or anything for that matter. even if Darcy did want to go into higher professional dancing I think it's just the case of watching as a parent that you don't notice worrying changes such as restrictive eating dance and any sport is about enjoyment and keeping fit and healththat'ss what matters Xx
This is fascinating to hear the numbers and cost of dance on the other side of the world. Much love from Aus
Would be really interested to hear your thoughts on the impact of the competitiveness for children - I danced throughout my childhood and on one occasion was the only one in my competition team to not win a medal. Thankfully my parents always emphasised how the most important thing was if I was enjoying it (which I was) but I can see how this could potentially impact a child negatively. Really interesting video though!
Thank you for this honest talk with the different sources you used. 😊
It’s also important to note that muscular builds tend to be heavier so if anything “healthy” to a dancer should be slightly heavier most of the time
Louise, you seem to have a great handle on things. Good job, Mum!
Lovely video with great wordings and valid points! Thank you ❣️
I'm 19 and training in Musical Theatre in hopes of ending up on the West End. Having not had much of a dance background and suddenly being in ballet and jazz classes, the issue of my own body image has never been more apparent. I'm a bigger person, curvier and taller than most in the class and being in a leotard was quite damaging for my mental health at first. Thankfully, the industry is moving forward, but the pace is slow and I am constantly aware that the way I look affects my likability and ability to get jobs.
I would love to know more about the sustainablity of dance. As children are growing all the time and ballet shoes etc get used and replaced regularly how doyou find it in terms of environmental impact? Is there options to recycle or donate items, or mend? You talked briefly about buying second hand. Love watching your videos and have done for 10 years now x
Great question! It's not something I'm very qualified to answer because I haven't had to deal with it yet - I pass all of Darcy's things down to Pearl! So, I'll leave you to independently research that one but I'm interested to hear what you find out if you do! xxx
Just listened to you on the Law of Attraction podcast.
Such a nice and honest video, thank you
I grew up dancing and as a plus size girlie it got a bit horrific as I got older so I stopped. But have u seen lizzy howell she’s incredible!
Wow I thought it'd be music prices! My parents used to pay £35 an hour every week for my lessons and that's about 7 years ago! I am so goddam lucky
I think my favourite thing about score-based competitive activities (dance, cheerleading, gymnastics etc) is that even though you're "against" other people, it's not direct competition. Your goal is not to beat someone else, your goal is to do your competitive element to the best of your ability and to achieve the best score you can - it's not you Vs them, it's you vs your scoresheet so it's a great way to be competitive without putting other people down. (Coming from an adult who has competed in cheerleading for 8 years)
I love the love Darcey has for dance this girl is going to go far💗
The only way I could dance as a kid was at my community centre because I couldn't afford the bus. It was 50p a week (I'm only 20 lol I must sound like 50 but I grew up in a pit village). I was really good at ballet and one of the teachers started getting the bus with me to the sports centre and let me join in on her proper classes for free. Sadly when I was 10 or 11 my grandad got sick and I had to help take care of him in my spare time instead, but dancing is a real privilege and I'm so glad I got to try it
I love your videos and you are wonderful, you’re girls are very well rounded. You and Liam are wonderful parents. Where did you get your earrings?
Thank you! Earrings are Kate Spade xxx
I stopped ballet at 14 when the pressure to do more lessons became more intense. I definitely developed an eating disorder which I cannot say was bought on by ballet itself, but the environment definitely made it worse. Although I don’t remember many instances of body image or weight being talked about, watching all the parts going to the most slender dancers and comparing yourself to the others in your class I think is more where the damage can start
Sending you a lot of love and thank you for sharing this xxx
My daughter attended a dance school for years , fortunately it had many types of dance so if a child was happier in hip hop, step, ballroom etc. they could find what made them happy , discover their niche or just enjoy multiple styles. She discovered competitive paddling, canoe and kayak and that sort of ended dance but it was her choice. As an adult she still paddles in regattas at least once a year because she just loves it.
My Mum drove me an hour away every Saturday to a dance school so I could take ballet but I preferred tap , much to her disgust🤣😂 it only lasted a couple of
Good luck with the girls dance. 🥰🙋🏼♀️
Such a good momma
I love your earrings ❤
As an ex dancer (danced as a kid) I was told that I wasn’t good enough for ballet because of my lack of gross motor skills. I would like to try again as an adult but that comment I heard as a kid has really put me off 😅
Don't let it hold you back. Release yourself from it and do what you enjoy. You deserve joy xxx
I have always wanted to be a ballerina when I was a kid. Up until 15 y.o.. But growing up in the village the only public place we had is the only secondary school lol.
LOLing so hard at “dance moms” in an American accent 😂
I think most community dance schools are trying to be better about the weight thing. I’m sure there’s some bad eggs out there but I think if you find a good community dance school, they understand that’s it’s for fun and fitness. Once you get to full time dance student or working it can change quite drastically
Great vlog
As a child took ballet and tap lessons. Truly enjoyed it but not so much all the practice.
Interesting because my particular teacher had blatant favorites in class and with teaching which reflected in theor teaching.
Looking for links that you mentioned. Where are they?
Oopps! Haven't put them in but if you google, it'll come up! xx
Worth it for the American “dance moms” alone!
haven't watched the full vid yet, but my weekly ballet lessons were a hundred quid a month! i guess it can really vary😅
altho, i was just doing lessons and grade exams for 10 years (without competitions/shows etc) - maybe darcy's ballet scene had more of this involvement, meaning they reduced the lesson prices?👍
My daughter danced for years she loved it but the girls that could pay for all the extra lessons always got more chances . We could only afford the basic lessons enough said !
I’m in Australia and my 4 year old daughters once a week 30 min jazz class is $15 plus a $70 enrolment fee 😳.
I'm plus size and I think body positivity has reached a level of stupidity. Can you have a short basketball player ? How can you be overweight and dance on your toes or be lifted and flipped. Let us plz be sensible in addition to being sensitive.
I think everything in moderation
basketball’s not really a fair comparison since the net must be a standard height. and shorter gymnasts succeed because it’s just less mass to flip around. but not all dance is in pointe shoes, and ultimately dance is an expressive art form that is open to all. not all dancers have professional goals. not everyone wants to do partnered dancing with lifts. and at this point, body positivity in the dance world is not even close to approaching overweight people-we’re still talking about small to medium sized. the issue with perspectives like yours is that it discourages people from finding a form of healthy exercise (for mind and body). my plus sized friend hears hateful comments while she’s literally working out at the gym-so what exactly is she supposed to do?!
As an outsider to the dance world, I’ve always perceived it as a toxic environment and would be very cautious if my child wanted to partake. I think the body image issues and general culture makes it a no-go for me personally
I can understand why you'd have those boundaries but I'd encourage you not to make something a 'no go' until you've tried it a little bit. You might, like me, find it a very positive environment xxx
wtf
Does Darcy know/appreciate/understand how much you spend on her passion or is that a conversation for when she is older? Also I think you may have not experienced negative body issues with the girls as they are slim so therefore what's expected. I was healthy but a bit rounder as a child still within healthy limits just held it differently and had a negative opinion said to me about my body at age 8. Never told my parents so good to have a conversation and if they hear anything being said to anyone else too.
Do your kids not do RAD ballet exams ?
I think I hadn't seen a video from Louise in a looong time, Darcy was still a baby 😅
Does Darcey do graded ballet exams at her dance school?
Yes she does xxx
Ballet is most definitely the least expensive when you’re little. When you’re older and burning through multiple £90 pointe shoes a week …oof
What is Nicolas UA-cam? Mentioned at 24 min
Oops! She's Clarke Life on here and is lovely xxx
Aloha Louise!! Great video, watching as an ex performer, ballet lover and teacher 💕🩰
Louise have you heard of English Youth Ballet? 🩰✨ there is a Norwich SWAN LAKE audition coming up!!! My love of ballet grew and grew through English Youth Ballet, couldn't recommend more highly 💖 I performed in 4 full length ballets from the age of 8 to 16 with them, learnt and loved so much. Very different approach to Royal Ballet, London Children's Ballet etc. Audition for Norwich is 22 March! it's almost meant to be ✨🥺🩰🦢
Don’t know if you + Darcy have watched the @therybkatwins on UA-cam. They do ballet content and acro very PG and child friendly