Psychopath or Sociopath | What You Need to Know

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  • Опубліковано 4 лют 2020
  • Learn more about psychopathy & sociopathy here: my.medcircle.com/3qg8YiW
    Psychopath, sociopath, or just arrogant? Few people understand the science behind the psychopath and the sociopath. In this full-length masterclass video, clinical psychologist and personality disorder expert Dr. Ramani Durvasula does a deep dive on the psychopath, the sociopath, and everything you need to know about antisocial personality disorder (ASPD).
    There's a fine line between someone who is overly-confident and someone who has antisocial personality disorder, which is the clinical diagnosis behind psychopathy and sociopathy. Not only are ASPD symptoms and behaviors difficult to spot, it's also far more common than most people realize.
    Some of what Dr. Ramani covers....
    - What causes antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) - nature or nurture?
    - What goes on in the brain of a psychopath or sociopath - and whether they can feel remorse or empathy
    - A deep-dive of the signs and symptoms of a psychopath and a sociopath
    - How to tell if your friend, coworker, or even your spouse is a psychopath or sociopath
    - The latest findings and research on ASPD, psychopaths, and sociopaths
    - How to handle a child who is showing signs of ASPD
    - How to cope with a parent, co-worker, boss, sibling, or family member who has psychopathic or sociopathic traits
    - Whether someone with antisocial personality disorder can recover / be cured
    “There is no ‘average’ person with antisocial personality disorder. You can find people with antisocial personality disorder everywhere from death row to the best table at the best restaurant in Los Angeles.” - Dr. Ramani Durvasula
    #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth #mentalhealthmatters #psychology #psychopath #psychopathy #sociopath #sociopaths #medcircle

КОМЕНТАРІ • 15 тис.

  • @MedCircle
    @MedCircle  4 роки тому +1433

    Have you met anyone with these personality traits? Let us know in the comments below - we want to hear your story.
    Watch exclusive video series featuring Dr. Ramani on personality disorders HERE: bit.ly/320r2yR

    • @genevalawrence801
      @genevalawrence801 4 роки тому +196

      Is there a way to contact you that is not on an open, public forum? "Outing" someone with antisocial personality disorder can be dangerous.

    • @kevinbaltarejo1114
      @kevinbaltarejo1114 4 роки тому +75

      Yes, I have. Two psychopaths. One is a a sadistic rapist and the other one is a serial killer. Both of them are my worst enemies.

    • @angiecrawford8420
      @angiecrawford8420 4 роки тому +112

      MedCircle in court process now fighting with everything that I have to get my boys back. WHY don’t judges have to be better educated on this?? Hearing the possibilities of going up against him scares me more than my worst nightmare! How do we find help?

    • @kdcruz75
      @kdcruz75 4 роки тому +49

      @@angiecrawford8420
      Because the whole judicial system is based on deception amd occult science..
      Utube : birth certificate stock market
      Utube : occult law of commerce
      U r colonial stock ..and security for thr charge u bring agaisnt a person...
      The whole court documemt is a negotiable instrument that os traded on tje stock market...

    • @hoodwinkedbyanangelmichaelfazi
      @hoodwinkedbyanangelmichaelfazi 4 роки тому +41

      Hi, I am definitely involved with a full-blown narcissist/psychopath in a civil criminal lawsuit and have 100s of videos of him saying the most egregious things. An example is he claims I have been a scammer all my life [nottrue] and another is that he posts videos that Ihaveflesh eating bacteria and when he does videos he does audio-only and even though it is his voice and his channel he denied it was his voice.
      it was very frustrating and its an ongoing case.
      the worst thing is he makes 3 + videos a day and all stating that he is not the person in the audio upload even lying to the prosecutor.
      So you are correct they really dont believe they do anything wrong because thus far he has gotten away with it.
      Even worse he made 50+ videos of how my ex-girlfriend is sleeping with many men [not true] she is getting married to her new boyfriend.
      He denies 64 audio and now video uploads on youtube saying hes just making commentary but in fact has no remorse for any of his deeds however the prosecution has been following him for a year now and knows he's lying.
      I will update you when its over.
      BTW, he calls may people wives ffing prostitutes bar girls whores and worse ... more that 20 that I can prove and he will go nuts even if you say his wife is a flying monkey...but she is and helps him on his shows.
      He has done all of the above to 20 people and again states he has never said a negative thing but only making commentary. truel you have nailed this topic.
      thanks for your insights

  • @beforeigo4284
    @beforeigo4284 3 роки тому +5372

    Don’t let anyone trick you into falling in love with their potential. Fall in love with what they show you. Believe their actions.

    • @landraallen5988
      @landraallen5988 3 роки тому +118

      That's Right I had to learn.

    • @michaellinder4945
      @michaellinder4945 3 роки тому +103

      Go with your first instinct!

    • @IsisNFriends
      @IsisNFriends 3 роки тому +31

      💯

    • @CBRRR-eh3ky
      @CBRRR-eh3ky 3 роки тому +86

      @@michaellinder4945 my first instinct told me she was awesome but she is all the oppposite. I guess i must throw ny instinct away and find another one lol

    • @meganmccallum1447
      @meganmccallum1447 2 роки тому +88

      But there great at the start and then not so great all of a sudden

  • @polarjeez
    @polarjeez 4 роки тому +9312

    She is so educated in every facet of psychology that she doesn't even pause to gather her thoughts when asked these questions. She immediately has such a well versed and thorough explanation in nearly every response. She's such a joy to listen to and so incredibly gifted with communication.

  • @joaobenzecry5792
    @joaobenzecry5792 Рік тому +568

    Can we take a moment to talk about how this content is on the internet FOR FREE??? Respect!

    • @matimoi
      @matimoi 7 місяців тому +11

      Don't jinx it

    • @Aryzo
      @Aryzo 7 місяців тому +4

      am i tripping or does the guy on the right seem like a psychopath himself? lol

    • @IshtarNike
      @IshtarNike 6 місяців тому +4

      It's not free. You are the product. They're relying on getting your attention so you eventually spend your money on stuff the advertisers want. All this content costs you money eventually. It's just far more indirect than it used to be.

    • @monklingtoneverjet2536
      @monklingtoneverjet2536 6 місяців тому +2

      @@Aryzo Jesus, I had the same thought.....lmao

    • @Aryzo
      @Aryzo 6 місяців тому +1

      @@monklingtoneverjet2536 it seems like he is huh? Hahah and hes like weirdly inquisitive about psychopaths 😂 looks like after every description of them hes thinking to himself "yea,that is how i am" lmaooo

  • @dawncarnell7029
    @dawncarnell7029 Рік тому +385

    I married a psychopath the marriage lasted 13 years! I am 4 years out but still working to find me and my life! I often think, “I wonder if I would have been better off if he accomplished killing me!” I live in a small town and finding counseling has been a joke! Your channel along with a few others has literally pulled me this far! I appreciate the knowledge I have gained.

    • @specialtwice4975
      @specialtwice4975 Рік тому +29

      Counciling can help, but only if a.) the therapist has empathy/kindness or b.) the therapist knows about cluster b.
      Just wanna let you are not alone in the world in your psychopathic findings. I dated a psychopath/covert narcissist.
      Lies, manipulation, cheating, you name it.
      I found what helped me heal most was research.
      These...beings...are not human. Whether that is from thousands and thousands of years ago with different cave species or a recent human evolution, who knows?
      But yeah, counciling can only go so far because either they are clueless, greedy, or a monster themselves.
      Again, just wanna say you are not alone. I remember that in itself helped the most.

    • @rebeccapruitt3259
      @rebeccapruitt3259 Рік тому +9

      That's where I am too. Praying every day to die.

    • @NaNa-re3wc
      @NaNa-re3wc Рік тому

      There are lots of online resources like Dr. Gabor Maté, he has helped me so much. Books by Thich Nhat Hanh have helped me tremendously too. I really hope you can find healing, being in an abusive relationship is so tough and dealing with the residual effects too. I dated a sociopath for a few years and it really slowed my progress from healing from childhood abuse. I wish you the best♥️

    • @NaNa-re3wc
      @NaNa-re3wc Рік тому +20

      @@rebeccapruitt3259 you can make it out and find someone healthy. You’re stronger than your situation. Please stay safe

    • @stevenhumphrey1838
      @stevenhumphrey1838 Рік тому +12

      I'm 28 years out. We have a 33 yr old daughter and 2 grandchildren. I've often wondered if I should have this conversation with our daughter. However, I think she understands something's not quite right about mom. She's very very smart but not scary like her mom.
      Point is having that experience is never truly in the past. Learn, be smarter, ( I like to say that I may not know exactly what I want but I've got a pretty clear idea of what I will not endure or tolerate.)
      Without exception, everyone's life is or will be scarred by tragedy. Pick it up move on live your life in such a manner that makes it clearly worth the FN trouble😉. In the event you're working through things?..... Endeavor to persevere.... Flourish.
      Hope that helps😐!

  • @TxHoneyBee
    @TxHoneyBee 4 роки тому +3785

    The only thing that I found disappointing was that bit about being distrusting of people who don't have a social circle. When you're someone who was abused by both parents for decades, abused by intimate partners, and abused by society for being "other" it may be in your best interest to stay away from people. It takes time to find trustworthy people, and that's okay. Anyone who judges you for that is not worth it.

    • @joseenoel8093
      @joseenoel8093 4 роки тому +69

      I like feeding the critters!

    • @annbell3864
      @annbell3864 4 роки тому +282

      Toxic mentally ill people can’t stand to be alone with their thoughts so they are very busy... I like being alone because I know I am in good company at least. This is also how they multiply and can take over a living space, state, city...

    • @kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934
      @kathyinwonderlandl.a.8934 4 роки тому +43

      Ann Bell .....Country....

    • @lindsayh5578
      @lindsayh5578 4 роки тому +210

      It’s still a good idea to be cautious until you get to know people.

    • @Wordtoyamom
      @Wordtoyamom 4 роки тому +235

      She was referring to people that picked up and started elsewhere because they were found out. The type to use an alias. I was sensitive to this too cause I have left a lot of circles of friends and am some what of a loner too lol. Like you could probably name a ton of people you went to school with and show them on fb, but the type she’s referring to would likely be resistant to.

  • @debmcgillvary4763
    @debmcgillvary4763 3 роки тому +4577

    When she mentions careers that could be phsycopaths she needs to include politicians.

    • @dabaflub
      @dabaflub 3 роки тому +128

      She mentioned ONE with CEO!

    • @bettyboo1927
      @bettyboo1927 3 роки тому +107

      WOOSH_POLICE I suppose it depends on the agenda of the psychopath.

    • @celebratingandover6135
      @celebratingandover6135 3 роки тому +154

      Bliss I think you might be a bit delusional in your ramblings here. You make a lot of sweeping generalisations which you’re probably not qualified to do. You’re also making a diagnosis of someone you’ve never met - President Trump.

    • @bliss4383
      @bliss4383 3 роки тому +11

      @@celebratingandover6135 Eat this, too.
      ua-cam.com/video/nsP9YLL1NeQ/v-deo.html

    • @seaniepc4
      @seaniepc4 3 роки тому +81

      @@bliss4383 You seem to have a bit of a disorder of your own. You post more and more / look we see you/ cant be arsed reading all that unimportant Crap you find and just take a chill pill calm down if possible. Or are you in need of Attention from people you do not even know. Bore somewhere else , thanks ... TDS is Real

  • @PetterssonRobin
    @PetterssonRobin Рік тому +47

    1:55:46 this part makes me cry. How I wish someone, anyone, had picked up on my desperate cry for help as a child. But the sad truth is that no one did, and I have suffered tremendously for it. 15 years later I am now finally making some progress by daring to confess to a psychologist

  • @RyanOlsen
    @RyanOlsen Рік тому +143

    Well done. Dr Ramani knows her stuff. She rarely says um. She is just chock full of knowledge and wisdom on these topics. We are gifted with this information, and it's so helpful.

    • @yyeezyy630
      @yyeezyy630 7 місяців тому +6

      You clearly watch Andrew Tate if you attach a stigma to um, which is a normal human thing

    • @RyanOlsen
      @RyanOlsen 7 місяців тому +11

      @@yyeezyy630 I clearly do not watch that person. Ramani is a gifted speaker, and I think you can agree that a person using um repeatedly is very distracting to listen to.

    • @Aryzo
      @Aryzo 7 місяців тому +9

      @@RyanOlsen yea but its not an indicator of a persons expertise really

  • @queentantrumofficial
    @queentantrumofficial 4 роки тому +2552

    Gosh, I wish she was my therapist.

    • @joseenoel8093
      @joseenoel8093 4 роки тому +23

      I would fake to be 1 to be 1 on 1 with her!

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому +21

      @Queen Tantrum You just gave a clear explanation why she should not be your therapist, unless you're looking to please your senses i.e. a therapist who tells you what you want to hear or conversly the opposite "Here's what needs fixing about you. . ." And very likely if you can identify w that, then you probably know exactly the disordered thoughts or behaviors in your own life that need changing, as well as the practical choices available to your unique situation, even to a degree no therapist could *as accurately* conclude.
      At a certain point - it seems to me - the main benefit of therapy is to have someone listen as we reveal *TO OURSELVES* - painfully honestly - what The Watcher (id) sees you doing all the time, and may reveal either excessive self-criticism, or any degree of disownership of responsibility - or any point in between.
      The idea that a therapist could know me better than I know myself as I look in the mirror HONESTLY - I find to be implausible. The therapist's mission statement includes my willingness to submit to a kind of brain hack - i.e. psychopharmacological intervention(s) designed to help me *demonstrate behaviors* considered by _________ to be more "normal" or less problematic or stress-inducing for those around me.
      And the real problem is that we are mostly all capable under certain conditions of expressing the full-range of behaviors when our very survival is threatened. And the real threats of current wars/ nuclear warfare, govt bribery and corruption - can put all of us under that stress - w mostly predictable responses: The definition of CIA social psyops.
      It's like Hermann Goering said - The bigger the lie, the more times repeated, the more people tend to believe it ESPECIALLY if they are led to believe they are under threat of attack.
      Americans are being programmed for depression and or anxiety because it is such an easy manipulation at that point. Ex: "Bomb Syria. Label anyone who disagrees 'an Assad-apologist' and a Russian spy." becomes reality for soft- minds - and off we go down the capitalist rabbithole with Islam as the threat, when in fact te MIC is the greatest CREATOR of depression and anxiety AND is the greatest threat to mankind's survival as a species on earth.
      1984 happened a looooooong time ago. *Blade Runner was November, 2019* and I'm pretty sure we all can spot a *replicant*
      Just sayin - you *may* start out lookin for a therapist, and end up saving humanity as we know it.
      *[Or maybe just masturbate instead?]*

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому +6

      @Electricfishfan *Touche.* BUT that doesn't contradict me pointing out - her showing her cards - so to speak - with her comment about avoiding "charming" ppl, while using several obvious "charms" i.e. affect displays, batting eyelashes, eyes wide, use of smile, hands sculpting air, etc etc. *She knows/worries that charming types may see through her mask of charms* - er so to speak. . . you gather my inference.
      Ultimately charms and makeup etc are a *distraction*

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому +1

      That may be the pithiest yt comment ever.
      Esp the *1 to be 1 on 1 with her* part. So *replicant-y*

    • @satsumamoon
      @satsumamoon 4 роки тому +18

      She might be well studied but it doesnt mean she will be good at treating patients. Another factor is "chemistry" ;finding a therapist to work with is like finding someone to have a successfull marriage with. Often being your own therapist is the best solution for the most part of your treatment.

  • @sospita_
    @sospita_ 4 роки тому +728

    'Emotional abuse is unacceptable any day of the week." Dr.R 🙏🏽💯

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому +4

      But in a world with no emotional abuse, how would we know to recognize it?
      *EVERYONE IS A TEACHER* - by example or *non-example - the better of the two.*

    • @mekerr4299
      @mekerr4299 4 роки тому

      @@TheJdmartinjax fake we never have cus we are oj im hoppy or not never you tell me its my perception

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому

      @@mekerr4299 I am pretty sure we agree.

    • @Mia-rb5lj
      @Mia-rb5lj 4 роки тому +2

      Precious. goods How could/should someone handle being Emotional abused by a stalker on U-tube who keeps following me..

    • @joseenoel8093
      @joseenoel8093 4 роки тому +3

      They can't function unless they have our full attention, telling us we're crap does the trick, and more tricking is it!

  • @JustBethTrying
    @JustBethTrying Рік тому +120

    The most frightening experience of my teaching career occurred many years ago. I was teaching 1st grade and one spring day in the cafeteria one of my students pulled the chair out from under another child as he was sitting down so that the child fell and spilled his lunch. The chilling part was hearing the 6 instigator say as he stood over the fallen child, “Last year today was field day and you pushed me down. I said I would get you back. Did you forget? I didn’t.”
    He was right that date the year before was field day.

    • @lynnebucher6537
      @lynnebucher6537 Рік тому +36

      Wow, that's the type of person who will accumulate grievances and one day do something violent.

    • @danielboone8621
      @danielboone8621 Рік тому +8

      Yup. That was me! I always get even, and the last laugh. Without fail.
      Remember: revenge is a dish best served cold! 👌

    • @Hafhafnhaf
      @Hafhafnhaf Рік тому +17

      @@lynnebucher6537 keep guns away from these types of people. This insanity has to stop.

    • @Hafhafnhaf
      @Hafhafnhaf Рік тому +7

      I'm watching all this and I notice the dark foreboding content contrasted against the cheerful yellow chairs and white background.

    • @eekk6230
      @eekk6230 Рік тому +19

      ​@@danielboone8621 bet you have a poster of the joker over your bed

  • @gab363
    @gab363 11 місяців тому +39

    She is right about forgiveness. I kept forgiving my mother, got my trust broken over and over again, until I finally let go of expectations which was painful as well because it meant there was no more hope. I wish I could let go of resentment and guilt and the feeling it was my fault, that maybe I didn’t love her enough.

    • @selinaogorman8380
      @selinaogorman8380 6 місяців тому +3

      Aww well with these personality disorders it’s difficult to forgive because they believe they can abuse you over and over like a free pass to continue there behavior properly forgive when she is not around but sadly your mom won’t get any better they say narcissistic people get worse with age because they believe there nothing wrong with them especially your mom so am sorry your going through this.🙏😞🕊

    • @selinaogorman8380
      @selinaogorman8380 6 місяців тому +4

      It’s not your fault never was so in time you can let her go I would so you don’t get hurt anymore let her suffer on her own I know she is your mom but going no contact will be the best to do whatever you decide.🙏🕊

    • @mellisagreen7801
      @mellisagreen7801 4 місяці тому +2

      Forgiveness doesn't mean you should continue to give someone the opportnity to hurt you.

    • @shasmeen
      @shasmeen 3 місяці тому +2

      I can relate. My mom has spent her life trying to destroy me. the more well and distance I get, the more creative she becomes.

  • @ipreferattitude
    @ipreferattitude 2 роки тому +653

    I love how she calls out that charming people can be so scary. It's like they're complimenting you but it really has nothing to do with you..

    • @maffytaffy1231
      @maffytaffy1231 2 роки тому +44

      So true. It’s even more entertaining to see people start to love bomb you when THEY are in need. Lmao I’ve been thru it too mcuh that now it’s kinda funny/crazy to experience but separate from myself

    • @towanda2947
      @towanda2947 2 роки тому +7

      In what way I know someone who does this.....does it make them feel better about themselves?

    • @ipreferattitude
      @ipreferattitude 2 роки тому +7

      @@towanda2947 I don't know if it's a genuine or lasting kind of feeling better about themselves, but I imagine that when they are complimenting someone with an agenda, they might feel a short term sense of being on their game and enjoying being successful at interaction. It's probably hard to correctly assume or generalize for them beyond that.

    • @maebandy
      @maebandy 2 роки тому +37

      Ever met a two year old that wants a cookie before dinner?

    • @towanda2947
      @towanda2947 2 роки тому +2

      @@maebandy ahhh yes

  • @lauratorres7085
    @lauratorres7085 3 роки тому +886

    I was adopted in infancy by a couple where one parent had psychopathic traits. She sometimes told me stories about how she and her cousin drowned animals when they were children. Even as an adult she had no regrets. She laughed about it. She had a sadistic streak that manifested with dependent children, pets, and later elders. She sometimes threatened to blind and even murder me when I was very young. She often told me, “I never make a threat I wouldn’t keep,” and “I am not a mercy person.”
    I survived and am neither blind nor dead. However living in a state of terror took its toll. I grew very slowly, never thriving. I am under 5’0” tall today. Dependent pets and elders also suffered while in her care. One of our family members died of starvation. It was horrible. I wish that the public knew that adoptees and foster child end up in the hands of abusers too. People say, “Oh but adoptive parents are all carefully vetted. Adopted children are wanted-no one would abuse them. It’s beautiful thing.” People adopt children for all kinds of reasons. The majority of adoptees I have met say they were adopted to save their adoptive parents’ marriages. They have their own stories about what happened to them when their adoption was a disappointment. They failed to save their adopters’ marriages. We have a multi-billion dollar adoption industry that supplies prospective adopters with babies and small children in exchange for money. Adoptees need safe homes too. We don’t need a double-whammy if it can be prevented. We need people to work in those places that can screen prospective adopters for personality disorders. They are needed in foster care too.

    • @Nonamagic
      @Nonamagic 3 роки тому +84

      That's terrible you had to go through that. I've heard some very disturbing stories from people that were fostered. I hope you are doing well now.

    • @janicescott7338
      @janicescott7338 3 роки тому +55

      So glad you survived the abuse. What a nightmare. Makes one wonder what the matter was with her husband. I guess he was victimized also. Anyway you are a survivor but it’s still not easy.

    • @RajRaj-ic7ql
      @RajRaj-ic7ql 3 роки тому +25

      Several books can be written on it.

    • @francesj.jenson6698
      @francesj.jenson6698 3 роки тому +34

      Jesus! I'm so sorry for the trauma and fear you experienced in your life. I only hope you are no longer in contact with her or her enablers that knew how unfit and abusive she was. I pray you had one or more adults in your life you could trust and feel safe in their company. I also pray you have pursued and benefitted from professional counseling to give you an opportunity to live a full and rewarding life. God bless you always. I thank you for your courage and strength to share your experiences. You are brave and important. Please continue moving forward and take excellent care of you! Much love, respect, and admiration, Frances xoxo

    • @KennethD000
      @KennethD000 3 роки тому +15

      We could all collectively write an entire series of books!!

  • @lorettajenkins6853
    @lorettajenkins6853 Рік тому +167

    The primary traits of a sociopath are an inability to actually honestly care for another human being, to feel another's pain, to feel sorry (deeply, truly sorry) for the pain he/she causes you (or others), to feel real love, to feel any real obligation to the well being of anyone but himself/herself, to have a conscience, period. Some say sociopaths tend to be “very charming”. I disagree with this characterization. I believe, rather, the sociopath mimics what he/she has observed as “charming” behavior tailored specifically to the individual upon whom he/she decides to prey. Sociopaths get off on “getting one over on you”, on interacting with you long enough to figure out what you like/care about (be that your kids, your pets, your family, your music, your hobbies, whatever), then tailoring their comments and conversations with you to those topics to “reel you in”, feigning similar interests or interest in general, playing you like a fiddle until you think they're so cool or so funny … then, once they've gained your trust, start testing you little by little in more sick ways to see if you'll do things to please them. To a sociopath, who is easily bored, it's all a game. You are a joke to them. They are getting pleasure at your expense, even though it may take you awhile to catch on. But you should have some early instinctive feelings that “something just doesn't feel right about this”. Trust your instincts IMMEDIATELY. The longer you stay involved with a sociopath, the more you will come to feel demoralized and broken and, quite possibly, suicidal. To the sociopath, you (and the countless others upon whom they are preying - because, make no mistake, they typically have multiple victims going at one time, “the others” - who they're keeping secret from you), you are a source of ego inflating supply. Everytime he/she can get you to come running when they say they want you, get you to believe them when they say “they're done with all that ” (referring to whatever bad behavior you've discovered and confronted them with, behavior that has deeply hurt you), whenever you react to the pain they cause you by crying /breaking down/ pleading/screaming/cursing/sobbing … they are LOVING it. It's like you're giving them the best drug, the best high they've ever had. And they know they've got you … and you become an even bigger joke to them than what you were to begin with. You're no longer a challenge, though, frankly, which makes you easily dismissed by them. Just when you think you wont hear from them again, though, you suddenly will, with a text that seems innocent enough … and you may be tricked into thinking, at that moment, “See, he/she does really care!” But again, watch and live it out, if you must, but you'll only find yourself right back at devastation and heart shattering pain. The sociopath cares about NO ONE, period. Sadly, deep inside, not even himself/herself. They are people who harbor a deep inner self-loathing, whose core is made of empty nothing and hateful insecurity. But NEVER make the mistake of thinking - if only you could show the socipath how committed YOU are to him/her, how much you love him/her, how YOU believe they are worthy of love, you can fix their inner wounded child …. Blah, blah, blah. Just stop yourself, for the love of all that is sane. I beg of you. Because your best efforts WILL NOT work to achieve this end. Your best efforts, your repeated coming back to them like this, in fact will only affirm the sociopath’s view of you as a pathetic pawn from whom he/she can continue to get “supply” (the ego feed they desparately need to survive). You mean NOTHING to him/her. You never did. You never will. A sociopath is not curable. There is no medicine, no anti-psychotic, no antidepressant, no therapy (the sociopath would never engage it anyway) that can ameliorate this condition. The only thing you must do is take steps toward SELF PRESERVATION. And you must, because a sociopath will kill you eventually. Truly. Psychologically damage you so profoundly, if you stay engaged in any relationship with him/her over a substantial period of time, that you may never recover. I know this. I allowed myself to stay committed to one for 22 years. And I'm intelligent. But my belief in my own self worth plummetted to the most dangerous lows a person's self-value could plummett. If you recognize these traits in whomever you've begun a relationship with, just RUN. and never, NEVER, look back. Block all contact. Don't fool yourself, as I did for years after I finally said, “Get out!”, into thinking, “Well, he sent me this text. I mean, I guess we could be friends.” It doesn't work! A sociopath doesn't have friends. A sociopath gathers people for “supply”, and any acts of reaching out to you is an attempt by the sociopath to see if they can still hook you, whether you will stil be an easy source of “supply” to them. It is ALL at your peril and expense and ALL designed for his/her benefit. Run, run, and run. And never, never, never look back. Trust me. I KNOW the truth of which I speak. Additionally, Catching a cheating spouse might be difficult, and knowing what local laws say you can and cannot do might be even more difficult. To simplify the process, consider hiring a private investigator to do the sleuthing for you I genuinely appreciate how incredible you are and your work! Thank you for a job well done Metaspyhub@gmail. com,,

    • @MissStrawberryGun
      @MissStrawberryGun Рік тому +12

      You're confusing psychopath with sociopath. Sociopaths are able to feel a certain degree of love/attachment, whereas psychopaths are not.

    • @shadesmarerik4112
      @shadesmarerik4112 Рік тому +3

      its often depicted as "inability"... what if someone is intentionally non-empathic. Like someone who has his personal ideology to feel empathic only for a specific group of people and actively suppress empathy for others? For example someone who is really really egocentric or egoistic, but usually is able to be empathic. I can believe that many sociopath can very well know pain, fears and read intentions of others, but they decide consciously or subconsciously to not act on their emotions?

    • @CY2.2.2
      @CY2.2.2 11 місяців тому

      Quick response as you seem to approach this from a non-scientific standpoint. Logically speaking sociopaths are made from societal stresses. Once you remove this stimulant, then equally they are capable to become a fully functional human being like any "normal" person. Also note she is ignorant. There is a high proportion of psychopaths in society that are fully functional and she states the majority end up in prison this is false.

    • @donhashugeballs
      @donhashugeballs 9 місяців тому

      ​@@MissStrawberryGunif psychopaths weren't able to understand feelings they wouldn't be so proficient at manipulating others. They CAN feel and understand emotions. The difference is unlike so called "Normal" people they have complete control over their emotions. The truth is all these "experts" still only have a small grasp on psychopathy. Not all birds have the same colors. Those of us on the higher spectrum are fully self aware. Thus we are able to hone in on our weaknesses and improve them.

    • @MissStrawberryGun
      @MissStrawberryGun 9 місяців тому +4

      @@donhashugeballs sounds like a very silly grandiose delusion. 😂
      never said they can't feel emotions. they can feel rage, for sure. they have COGNITIVE empathy. what classifies someone as ASPD is lack of being able to FEEL empathy.

  • @Lukesh30253
    @Lukesh30253 Рік тому +53

    I have never been diagnosed, but I believe I have antisocial personality disorder in a higher functioning capacity. I am a business owner with a wife and two kids and when my wife found out it helped her understand me and helped our relationship. The catch is that I have faith in the Bible and I practice the growth that it says you are required to maintain in order to be a Christian, so I have a high standard of a moral code that I actively practice each day like lifting weights whether you believe in God, or not, at least I have some thing I strive to achieve that holds me to a standard higher than even a non-sociopath in most cases

    • @embassysweetsjen8607
      @embassysweetsjen8607 8 місяців тому +3

      🙏

    • @Tysha-vh6kq
      @Tysha-vh6kq 8 місяців тому

      the fact you have a moral code says enough about how weak you are.

    • @IvarTheBoneless40
      @IvarTheBoneless40 7 місяців тому

      Your already asking yourself if you have it so you probably dont have it. Antisocial means that you don't conform nor care about the social norm, you are rather miss using it for yourself and self gane. Ook ets say your wife s parent have a lot of life saving and you have a pyramide scheme any common husband wordt come there inlaws out of there life saving a psychopath or a sociopath wont care and can't even care about that they just do it

    • @Kitty-ex2gq
      @Kitty-ex2gq 6 місяців тому +3

      Sheesh. You sound like a joy to be around…..

    • @lyrickdv8518
      @lyrickdv8518 3 місяці тому +3

      ⁠@@Kitty-ex2gqI know right a nice family man with 2 kids and also a business too and a firm believer in Christ sounds like an absolute joy to be around

  • @abigailiovino72
    @abigailiovino72 4 роки тому +182

    Dr ramani talking about personality disorders for 2 HOURS??? Am i in heaven???

  • @briananderson8428
    @briananderson8428 3 роки тому +647

    "Their whole life is about getting away with stuff." Wow. Chilling and very telling.

    • @woooweee
      @woooweee 3 роки тому +18

      more so when you realize it describes women.

    • @insidejah9293
      @insidejah9293 3 роки тому +47

      ☝🏽looks like we got a narc on the loose!

    • @sparkyroots7526
      @sparkyroots7526 3 роки тому +8

      If you watch the corporate testimony in the Grenfell Tower Inquiry here on yt, you can see bucket loads of it.

    • @Treatsandthreadscom
      @Treatsandthreadscom 3 роки тому +2

      Super fun but annoying

    • @scottdoty5734
      @scottdoty5734 3 роки тому +6

      Like a person who pretends to be a medical doctor with their PhD, like someone who uses psych terms in all kinds of out there and bizarre ways ? What page of the dsm is flying monkey on?

  • @jedunn8950
    @jedunn8950 Рік тому +40

    This is a fantastic duo...brilliant teacher and interviewer. I learned a lot from these series, thank you!

  • @natashakhan1942
    @natashakhan1942 8 місяців тому +13

    7:48 Cluster B ASPD misconception (anti-society / norms of society) 11:05 Cluster C Avoidant PD, Social Anxiety disorder 15:12 16:00 17:47 24:10 ASPD marker 26:00 47:30 Do not take a diagnosis (or PATTERN) as your label or definitive permanent state, take it as a step to move to their best version of themselves and optimal life style 51:00 1:05:55 Adult’s consent 1:08:23 Pattern does not feel great and cant be changed 1:12:53 1:18:20 1:20:39 Psychopath’s game (actions based on attracting or impressing vs disposable or dispensable in their service) 1:25:00

  • @ultravioletpisces3666
    @ultravioletpisces3666 2 роки тому +722

    "Emotional Abuse is never acceptable any day of the week."

    • @danielcoleman4807
      @danielcoleman4807 2 роки тому +14

      Mean people suck.

    • @patrickkirby7612
      @patrickkirby7612 2 роки тому +6

      Funny that SHE is doing all these things she says I'm doing. I'm an idiot.

    • @lindabergman3127
      @lindabergman3127 2 роки тому +2

      Agreed .the main stream propaganda media's and the DNC politicians truly need to watch this video

    • @lindabergman3127
      @lindabergman3127 2 роки тому +2

      @Phillip Hiller yep alot of that goes on🥵

    • @TheNemesis442
      @TheNemesis442 2 роки тому +3

      the only abuse that exists is physical.
      verbal abuse = not always saying nice things
      emotional abuse = not taking responsibility for your actions, you control the way you feel; and not other people.

  • @kaitlynstone2812
    @kaitlynstone2812 3 роки тому +500

    I like her. I wish we had more therapists like her: passionate, honest, intelligent, empathetic.

    • @christianpulisic7784
      @christianpulisic7784 3 роки тому

      Kaitlyn Stone,You are beautiful 🌹🌷🌺,hope you are not with a narc 😈!!

    • @MarcelAspenite
      @MarcelAspenite 3 роки тому +8

      I thought she was very matter of fact and unempathetic. I guess when you deal with thousands of cases you just become a number.

    • @jesuisjesusr3352
      @jesuisjesusr3352 3 роки тому +10

      She’s not after the money 🐽 she cares, people like her make a difference in healthcare, they are part of the solution and not the problem.

    • @7Mushrooms7
      @7Mushrooms7 3 роки тому +11

      @@MarcelAspenite You need to be like that to explain things properly and to deal with hundreds of these cases.

    • @kirap4476
      @kirap4476 2 роки тому +3

      Unfortunately she is $500/hr

  • @SupremeAtheist
    @SupremeAtheist Рік тому +167

    The tricky side of diagnosing people is that narcissistic people are becoming now the NEW parameters of what NORMAL means. Actually, some professionals who gives the diagnosis can be narcissistic themselves.

    • @alpomartinez291
      @alpomartinez291 Рік тому +30

      It is ironic that the word narcissism has come to mean self-love, when it is in fact the case that the worst narcissists have no cohesive self to love, which is the source of their problem.

    • @babyprincessplayground4250
      @babyprincessplayground4250 11 місяців тому +1

      Ddlg abdl age regression little space my channel dissociative identity disorder

    • @alfobootidir2474
      @alfobootidir2474 10 місяців тому +8

      American individualism culture muddies the waters

    • @denisarado6884
      @denisarado6884 10 місяців тому +5

      @@alpomartinez291I agree 100%

    • @katherinekelly5380
      @katherinekelly5380 9 місяців тому +5

      It’s sort of like hearing someone dropped dead of a heart attack with ‘normal cholesterol’ and you think in a society where the number 1 killer is heart disease, is that ‘normal cholesterol’ range set to high?

  • @SonicPhonic
    @SonicPhonic Рік тому +31

    Thank you! What a super-awesome chat! I specialized in psychology for 3 years in university and took "Abnormal Psych". 10 years ago I became roommates with a friend who ended up being a sociopath. There was slways drama, arguments and his behavior with a co-worker seemed bizarre and cruel. A good friend said he sounded like a sociopath. I found a "sociopath checklist" online and knew of the general criteria. He got a 4/5,. I thought he was honest as I had no reason to believe he was a liar; he said he was honest. One day, after he used my laptop, I found some very revealing skype chat and realized everything was a lie. I'm mentioning this because the lying is hard to prove unless you look carefully and honestly. In hindsight, I admit I overlooked warning signs as I'm non-confrontational and was naive. As the expert says here, if you have concerns about someone, look at their behavior broadly. I now think of any relationship as a something like a workplace: no one gets a promotion before proving themselves. Better to have no relationship than a bad relationship.

    • @specialtwice4975
      @specialtwice4975 11 місяців тому +3

      How to spot a sociopath/psychopath for regular people:
      -their eyes look dull, bored, etc. It's like looking at an animals eyes. There's just...nothing there, no ones home.
      -after a while you can catch their voice sounding monotone, dull. Like they are reading from a history text. They might be able to hide it at first, but not always.
      -if you have...truly experienced one (Shivers)...you will know them just by their vibe. Your gut will tell you, "avoid avoid avoid!"
      -they are smart, really smart. Super duper smart. Do NOT under any circumstance think they have average iqs or that you can outsmart them, most times you can't unless you have solid proof. Most have 150+ Iq but some can have 200+ and higher.
      -Most don't have s3xual orientations. With a psychopath they can suit anyone, male, female, les, gay, trans...
      They don't have a personal preference. Some will, but most don't. They swing both ways.
      -Sometimes they will tell you. You'll be sitting there with them at a coffee shop, sipping your drink, when they suddenly say out of no where "You know, you should really stay away from me."
      You ask why, cause it's super eerie, and they respond "I'm not a good person."
      -anger. They will have anger. Tell you they wanna punch people, etc. Anger is a major sign.
      -they will act weird, creepy. They will hide behind a corner and shout "boo!" as you pass them, or they will suck the energy from the room by dropping their mask for a minute. It will feel like you are in the room with garek (the wolf) from "the never ending story"
      -time. To spot a psychopath takes time and patience. I've had a lot of experience, and so far I've been able to tell within a year or so.

    • @bobbill1028
      @bobbill1028 6 днів тому

      @@specialtwice4975 very accurate describes me well

  • @NeoPhoneix
    @NeoPhoneix 2 роки тому +374

    I feel the same way about meeting "charming" people. It always makes me wonder who they really are.

    • @unknown-lf6zx
      @unknown-lf6zx 2 роки тому +31

      Same. I like the quiet people now that dont have to be center of attention

    • @debracottrill7989
      @debracottrill7989 2 роки тому +1

      I knew Santa hated all of us sycophants. 😐

    • @jage5256
      @jage5256 2 роки тому +19

      They are users. There's nothing to them. Avoid them at all costs.

    • @jamesglenn4266
      @jamesglenn4266 2 роки тому +12

      They put on a fassad to hide their true self but people get sucked in by them and think that they are wonderful.

    • @carolkotcheck6065
      @carolkotcheck6065 2 роки тому +7

      @@unknown-lf6zx I tried those out but they’re the same, or worse, just takes longer for their disorders to appear.

  • @jenniferzazula6030
    @jenniferzazula6030 2 роки тому +700

    This woman is so clear and concise and knowledgeable…I would love to have her as s therapist.

    • @newjersey-thesupertrucker
      @newjersey-thesupertrucker 2 роки тому +8

      Shecis clearly one of the personalities she's talking about.

    • @regina0273
      @regina0273 2 роки тому

      @@newjersey-thesupertrucker wdym?

    • @nakha9123
      @nakha9123 2 роки тому

      Good call. 💯 Percent Agree👍

    • @KasraParanoia
      @KasraParanoia 2 роки тому +11

      @@newjersey-thesupertrucker
      No man, she just personally lived a lot of shit with these kind of ppl :) after a lot of abuse u become expert in the domain.

    • @newjersey-thesupertrucker
      @newjersey-thesupertrucker 2 роки тому +3

      @K sounds good but I can see she's exactly one of the personality types she's talking about

  • @carleypetillo7685
    @carleypetillo7685 Рік тому +15

    Thank you both. You were my rock during my spiritual awakening. Now I am fully aware of how no remorse can debilitate a sensitive personl like me. I was casted into the dark

  • @SchgurmTewehr
    @SchgurmTewehr Рік тому +15

    I once had a friend at school whom I now think is a sociopath turned psychopath. As a child he was always restless, completely self-centered and violent. He was also very good at lying and pretending to fell remorse later, and apologizing. While this was maybe something like ADHD as a child, he clearly learned to accept and control it more, but still has occasional outbursts. Later, when he was my friend for a year or two, he would always get angry at someone if they didn’t master or understand topics and traits which were part of his personal identity, like mathematical logic, English (verbal language, not grammar which he was never good at) which manipulation through politeness, playing video games and other, smaller things. Instead of explaining and respecting and understanding that the other person (sometimes me), he would get angry at them for not being like him. This seems very narcissistic to me. I stopped accepting his behavior and just didn’t spend any more time than necessary with him (again, it was at school). I don’t want to make a diagnosis or something like that, which is clearly not in my power and I’m not an expert, but it was very clear that he was a emotionally draining (for others, especially me) draining person with no respect and he never showed any signs of real empathy either. He was born 2 months early, so maybe he isn’t even to blame, as he also behaved like a sociopath in childhood (I know that children still develop their personality and this probably wasn’t clinical). I speculate he has become a psychopath because I was still at school with him for two and a half years after he ceased to be my friend. He got better and better at controlling his behavior, I observed, and the angry narcissistic outbursts become more rare.
    What I do for sure know is that he manipulated me (intentional or just because it was so easy that is happened from itself) when my parents had just been divorced, I was 11 and had only one friend, more of a pal or buddy, at school, and was hence very vulnerable. He controlled me throughout the friendship and it was generally very exploitative. I don’t think he ever saw me as that important, it just brought him pleasure being together with me, he never helped me and it wasn’t mutually beneficial. I have always been very empathetic and so he used that trait. I regret ignoring what I knew about him from his childhood behavior, but he had but become so much better at hiding and controlling it. . After the divorce I probably was just not able to accept that nobody at school could really be my friend, and so I let myself me manipulated by the one who seemed nicest, at least not condescending (in the beginning) of the „friendship“. I have learned from this part of my life and I don’t think I will ever me that easily manipulated again. I’m very aware of how people around me behave and what their intentions might be.
    I wish you support, awareness, and knowledge for anyone out there who has encountered or will encounter any of these personalities in their life, like I did.

  • @Andromeda_M31
    @Andromeda_M31 4 роки тому +3368

    No one roasts a narcissist like Dr. Ramani. :D

    • @ViliusJack
      @ViliusJack 4 роки тому +83

      Andromeda I think she might be one lol

    • @AdiMNET
      @AdiMNET 4 роки тому +186

      @@ViliusJack I think you might be one lol

    • @ViliusJack
      @ViliusJack 4 роки тому +7

      Adi M signs point to ya haha base off my research

    • @AdiMNET
      @AdiMNET 4 роки тому +32

      @@ViliusJack Okay! 😶

    • @smushbrain
      @smushbrain 4 роки тому +187

      No she isn’t, she is very empathetic.

  • @bernard6255
    @bernard6255 3 роки тому +638

    I once heard it said: "You can judge the character of a person by the way they treat people who can't do anything for them". It's something that always stuck w/ me,. When i'm entering a new relationship or friendship i make a point of observing how that person tends to treat other people, and it's interesting and instructive how often it is radically different from how they interact w/ me.

    • @timisaac8121
      @timisaac8121 3 роки тому +14

      Very interesting: Do you mean they treat the server well, and you like shit? Or the other way?

    • @WollongongSkyWatch
      @WollongongSkyWatch 3 роки тому +42

      @@timisaac8121 beware the person who gives most to those who mean least. Case in point: my father is a master woodworker, joinery, cabinetry, home builder trade, yet was too busy to build me a kitchen pantry when I moved to house that had no cupboards. When the neighbour's children kicked the ball over, he couldn't just throw it back over like I always do, he ended up rolling it into the front yard and under the house it went. He then wrote them an apology letter explaining where to find it. All my mother's complaints and frustrations are booming in the back of my mind theses days.

    • @timisaac8121
      @timisaac8121 3 роки тому +69

      @@WollongongSkyWatch I have seen that before: A person exceedingly gracious and charming to everyone on the street but nasty as 5 day old cod fish to those around him.

    • @WollongongSkyWatch
      @WollongongSkyWatch 3 роки тому +17

      @@timisaac8121 thank you, Tim, the validation is truly appreciated and warming. None of my family want to see it, ie his sisters and their children.

    • @timisaac8121
      @timisaac8121 3 роки тому +8

      @@WollongongSkyWatch NOOO!! That is truly the worst!~!! They gaslight you by cooperative!! Very painful for you. Do you have a plan or just trying to do your best?

  • @serfranklin6022
    @serfranklin6022 5 місяців тому +4

    Kudos to the interviewer too, she is extremely articulate and he can keep up without getting totally lost in some of her explaining. I had to pause and go back 2 or three times to soak in some concepts, he didn't even break a sweat once 👏🏽

  • @laflaca1530
    @laflaca1530 6 місяців тому +5

    Thank you Dr. Ramani! You are so articulate, knowledgeable, empathetic, helpful, an incredible educator and AMAZING woman!. I'm sooo happy I found you here. Thank you.

  • @K3zz21
    @K3zz21 2 роки тому +749

    How can any human being store this much thorough information in their head and effortlessly articulate it on command with this much fluidity???? This lady is unbelievable.

    • @josephineananda
      @josephineananda 2 роки тому +25

      Anyone who is gifted.

    • @haraldhwick
      @haraldhwick 2 роки тому +41

      They dive into the problem in a daily basis.

    • @69Rain420
      @69Rain420 2 роки тому +20

      @@josephineananda Leave. Now. thanks 😊

    • @jimmydriveway
      @jimmydriveway 2 роки тому +10

      Because she loves the sound of her own voice.

    • @JenJenMegaDooDoo
      @JenJenMegaDooDoo 2 роки тому +62

      It's her passion, you can tell she lives and breathes this stuff.

  • @deedee7780
    @deedee7780 2 роки тому +900

    Dr. Ramani: "To me now charming people are terrifying." OMG I totally get that!!

    • @angelsaing579
      @angelsaing579 2 роки тому +13

      So would it be safe to say that alpha & sigma males are narcissists by nature?

    • @kirk1007
      @kirk1007 2 роки тому +14

      @@angelsaing579 idk. Alpha's perhaps. definitely be on guard with them

    • @pittyj369
      @pittyj369 2 роки тому +7

      Don't take words to face value, literally. She meant in moderation is cool Dedee

    • @deedee7780
      @deedee7780 2 роки тому +2

      @@pittyj369 obviously lol

    • @pittyj369
      @pittyj369 2 роки тому +1

      @@deedee7780 not obvious, what 3 traits does charm envelopes according to you?

  • @lk6762
    @lk6762 Рік тому +1

    Spectacular back and forth. Could listen to her all day. So interesting

  • @nethuranasinghe4484
    @nethuranasinghe4484 3 місяці тому +2

    Dr Ramani’s expertise shines through in every video. The way she presents facts and evidence with such clarity is truly commendable. Thanks to her, I've become a dedicated viewer of MedCircle!!

  • @n.c.6211
    @n.c.6211 4 роки тому +701

    "Prince Charming is most likely Prince Psychopathy" so true

    • @sadaesthetic724
      @sadaesthetic724 4 роки тому +7

      Fight me

    • @n.c.6211
      @n.c.6211 4 роки тому +5

      @@sadaesthetic724 Why would you say that?

    • @rhysweaver7178
      @rhysweaver7178 4 роки тому +9

      @@n.c.6211 I think she says it because she got dumped by someone.

    • @n.c.6211
      @n.c.6211 4 роки тому +15

      @@rhysweaver7178 Oh, I see. Thanks. Not a native speaker so I assumed she wanted to believe the fantasy. There are movies and novels for that, but not real life. If one becomes Prince Charming after years then that's not love bombing, it is true love. But if one presents themselves that way it's an act.

    • @dfinlen
      @dfinlen 4 роки тому +2

      @ggg whatev yeap, everyone pretends but some of us are real. Look at every professional.

  • @tannerholmes1587
    @tannerholmes1587 2 роки тому +679

    The understanding of human psychology is an asset these days. You shouldn't cause yourself anxiety or paranoia, but you should always be on guard for the ulterior motives of other people.

    • @amandasligar9269
      @amandasligar9269 2 роки тому +24

      I agree..people's intentions can be hidden easily

    • @djbillyb001
      @djbillyb001 2 роки тому +11

      bruh … psychopaths and sociopaths aren’t some huge percentage of our population. u sound crazy. we can expect most people to behave with some human decency

    • @addiano
      @addiano 2 роки тому +16

      Because of that I'm always very paranoid and have huge issues trusting people..

    • @towanda2947
      @towanda2947 2 роки тому

      So that basically runs straight across the board?

    • @cherry-or2rk
      @cherry-or2rk 2 роки тому +1

      Same!🤗

  • @jrelevates1574
    @jrelevates1574 Рік тому +3

    I like his version of forgiveness, I'm going to adopt that. My childhood could not have gone any other way, gives a certain amount of freedom, immediately.

  • @justincase6588
    @justincase6588 Рік тому +2

    My first time watching your channel. Extremely helpful and perfect presentation. Your honesty and sincerity fly out from the screen. Great to see and I'll check out more of your content.

  • @jc10907Sealy
    @jc10907Sealy 3 роки тому +1015

    “Charming people are terrifying” - so true!

    • @annajamesja7850
      @annajamesja7850 3 роки тому +50

      Not all of them are... Actually most are not

    • @betacam22
      @betacam22 3 роки тому +5

      Yes, me. 😞

    • @nelizajoey26
      @nelizajoey26 3 роки тому +10

      too good to be true

    • @samri_thebutterfly3599
      @samri_thebutterfly3599 3 роки тому +8

      Guy Leite Jr same😏 its the best & worst thing to be charming

    • @jc10907Sealy
      @jc10907Sealy 3 роки тому +73

      Samri Fikre
      Charming means to charm or cast a spell over another. Much better to be gracious and respectful.

  • @Smokeysunshinexoxoxo
    @Smokeysunshinexoxoxo Рік тому +200

    she is a genius. the way she speaks on these things leaves no room for misunderstanding. So refreshing as a student of psychology.

    • @mentalasylumescapee6389
      @mentalasylumescapee6389 Рік тому

      she is an LGBT male hater

    • @mentalasylumescapee6389
      @mentalasylumescapee6389 Рік тому

      Ok so based on this diagnostic video i understand here is where I stand as a single man (*JUST from the video)...
      Me: "Hi I wanna talk to you because you asked how I was, I wan't to be polite because you have been to me..."
      Female: Oh REALLY!!! I wanted you to be my Husband...
      Video: Oh he is playing prince charming and definitely a psycho.
      ...OK now flip that over
      Me: "Ok i see you looking at me but i'm just gonna ignore you, i'm busy and have no interest in talking..."
      Female: "Oh REALLY!!! I wanted you to be my Husband...
      Video: Oh he is playing with your mind and definitely a psycho.
      FFS *JUST F**KN CAN'T DO ANYTHING, IF YOU ARE A SINGLE MALE THE ONLY PSYCHOS UNLESS YOU ARE A SERIAL KILLER IS FEMALES, SAME WITH THIS STUPID B*TCH CONTROLLING THIS VIDEO, THE MAN IS A MALE B*TCH CASE CLOSED*

    • @aleksandarkarajic3442
      @aleksandarkarajic3442 3 місяці тому +1

      Not a genius but a good psychologist knowledgeable on the topic.

    • @kawaiimagicalex5170
      @kawaiimagicalex5170 2 місяці тому

      no she is narcissist self.

    • @brandonwilliams5526
      @brandonwilliams5526 2 місяці тому

      True

  • @soulburntarotllc8155
    @soulburntarotllc8155 Рік тому +3

    I really enjoyed listening to this. Its difficult to find comprehensive and articulate psych specialist sources as well put together as this was.

  • @lindakenney7883
    @lindakenney7883 Рік тому +3

    I really Love how you express your Professional Knowledge

  • @lisasunshine7654
    @lisasunshine7654 3 роки тому +430

    1:17:13 “Emotional abuse is unacceptable any day of the week.”

    • @pinkyhotmessx69
      @pinkyhotmessx69 3 роки тому +8

      Emotional abuse triggers emotional abuse. It's usually the one who did the abusing that is deemed the victim.

    • @judedavis92
      @judedavis92 3 роки тому +2

      They probably had it coming

    • @theenchantedforester4661
      @theenchantedforester4661 3 роки тому +8

      any abuse is unacceptable any day of the week, month, year, or century

    • @YouAreInfinity117
      @YouAreInfinity117 3 роки тому +6

      @@pinkyhotmessx69 everything will wither and decay but it’s energy will stay

    • @TM-pn3zk
      @TM-pn3zk 3 роки тому

      ha, well it is the "new normal" so better get used to it. Richard Grannon vids may help

  • @sparkzmentalz2
    @sparkzmentalz2 3 роки тому +275

    1:13:47 "They can keep a lid on it long enough to get a ring on it." This is so true with manipulators and gaslighting lol.

    • @beezb728
      @beezb728 3 роки тому +10

      This described my recent ex-husband to a T. Highly intelligent, manipulative, covert, charming, until the ring went on.. within days a true destructive monster was unleashed. My family and friends couldn't see what l was talking/begging for them to see, nothing nade sense until 2 friend's who have lived something similar in their past came to my rescue. Early on his own daughter, a BP herself, did try to give me hints which l naively did not understand, as l never before have heard or known of any one with these issues, and least with antisocial personality, narcissism and bipolar disorders. It's 3 years later and l am still healing from those 2 years of nightmares which he dragged me into, he almost ruined my entire life, affected deeply my emotional, physical and financial health. I was just blessed to still have emotional supportive health thru friends who fought for me and still have my back. These kind of ppl are true evil, creating havoc and leaving a path of destruction wherever they go.

    • @beezb728
      @beezb728 3 роки тому +2

      @fr_ Tempest So true. I much later realized that, why we were on and off-on relationship for 5 years, then l broke it up, only to have him return 2 years later and immediately he swept me off, within less than a year we married and the true nightmares started with in days...8 months later, l had to escape to save my life!. Your sense of timing is perfect.

    • @yxngscxmbxg7193
      @yxngscxmbxg7193 3 роки тому +1

      @@beezb728 we are made into this. Everyone with ASPD once had the potential for positive mental health. People created this

    • @beezb728
      @beezb728 3 роки тому

      @@yxngscxmbxg7193 People? What ppl? Only If you're referring to the parents ...as she explains early developmental environments is only thing that could somehow change an outcome ..ironically...often these kind are luckier than most people ..when they seem to be the ones truly finding and keeping for themsleves "the really empathetic and kind ppl" ..those of us, who WISHED we could somehow help them, and allowing them to make good changes to their behavior and for mutual benefit...but instead we just walk right into their evil trap ..wether that trap is made by his/her parents of the early environment or created out of their exploitative cunning minds .....One thing is (we) "empaths" do try to live and love them like they are but usually ( more than often) end up either destroyed, mentally, emotionally and financially if not too, even maimed if we do not escape, we must run out litteraly and physical to protect our lives!!. There is NO fixing of any kind for these ppl ..that is a ONLY sad reality.. tougher for womenn to live with one of these... men by nature are more resourceful to survive.. for women, as our nature is to nurture and care we tend to hang around hoping ..praying for change until at some point ..we hope something or someone comes to rescue us. l say these ppl, are well developed Dracula's in the flesh! ..have learned to suck life out of another human and many do enjoy, doing it! For they are Merciless.

    • @dodgebullet7423
      @dodgebullet7423 3 роки тому +3

      Almost married a woman like this. Yes I waited 2 years 2 months and she came unglued. Thankful I waited

  • @adorable_anarchy2
    @adorable_anarchy2 Рік тому +8

    Listening to Dr. Ramini describe CEOs: I can relate the characteristics she describes to most employers or higher ups I’ve worked for by her descriptions alone. She just nails it. She is so knowledgeable and I’ve learned so much from listening to her

    • @donhashugeballs
      @donhashugeballs 9 місяців тому

      She's not that great. She's better than most of these so called psychologists. But certainly not the best. Dr. Sam Vaknin is one of the more knowledgeable on this subject.

    • @Rasmus-Sweden
      @Rasmus-Sweden 5 місяців тому

      🙏❤

  • @davidortizjr.2391
    @davidortizjr.2391 5 місяців тому +1

    You guys are incredible & changed my life & helped me think positive as well my personal therapist. Knowledge is dam power. Thanks again.

  • @cynthiamyles6179
    @cynthiamyles6179 3 роки тому +406

    When they show you who they are the first time....believe them, seek help and get out.

    • @abigailsimpson5904
      @abigailsimpson5904 3 роки тому +14

      So true.. run

    • @user-of9bx1uk3u
      @user-of9bx1uk3u 3 роки тому +6

      Run 🏃🏾‍♀️ faster 💨

    • @missperfectluxury7630
      @missperfectluxury7630 3 роки тому +12

      Yea i dated a sociopath he was very charming at first for like 7months straight n he got along with everyone and then tried to control and manipulate me and had people go against me , i ended up exposing him and he cried threaten to kill himself if i left him i blocked him but he still until now tries finding ways to speak to me is creepy

    • @abigailsimpson5904
      @abigailsimpson5904 3 роки тому +10

      @@missperfectluxury7630 ensure you stay away from him. His ultimate goal is to lure your back in so he can punish you. Run💃💃💃💃💃💃💃💃

    • @missperfectluxury7630
      @missperfectluxury7630 3 роки тому +3

      Abigail Simpson yes mam thank u he even had the audacity to message me on my personal email after blocking him its sad to know people like that exist and cant be helped but im just happy im aware now and can move on and watch for those red flags for anyone new i find

  • @FatShork
    @FatShork 2 роки тому +343

    The way Dr. Durvasula talks about children always brings tear to my eyes, and what she said about that grief you feel when seeing other kids with caring loving families, the sense of having been robbed of that and a normal childhood, she got that spot on, bullseye.

    • @jocelyncastillo9221
      @jocelyncastillo9221 2 роки тому +12

      Breaks my heart to know that...

    • @phallup2136
      @phallup2136 2 роки тому +10

      That's exactly how I felt as a kid and feel even more now as my family has fallen apart

    • @Kayster1971
      @Kayster1971 2 роки тому +16

      The kids are the real losers in these situations. When I did in home therapy with families that were predominantly referred by child services I ran into individuals with these personality disorders regularly. It was terrible to see what was happening with their children. I ended up working with the child to help them know it’s not them it’s the adult’s issue & to look for their self-worth inside themselves. It was truly heartbreaking & something that will never leave me.

    • @carolkotcheck6065
      @carolkotcheck6065 2 роки тому +1

      I know, sorry you have to, too.

    • @firegoddess662332
      @firegoddess662332 2 роки тому +1

      @@Kayster1971 ok.. if you have been dating one of these kids.. of course he is no longer a kid. But he is what I believe to be BPD with Cluster B Narcissistic personality disorder so what would that look like to a normal person? He appeared to be very honest at first, then the longer I'm around.. the more the odd outbursts and petty arguments. Bringing up a text message to a guy who sent a text message about giving me some d!€k and he would bring it back up over and over again throughout our relationship in order to make the terrible things that he would do to me alright.. and they wouldn't even add up. Like what he did was just not the same.. and how long he used it ..that one thing he could say was a mistake of mine. And he continued to use it to justify everything he did to me. Cheating, which he never admitted. But the fact that he was constantly starting stupid petty arguments just to leave me at home so he could run off and go to his ex who he was obsessed with. And he doesn't have any remorse.. and if he does, it doesn't have the same effect as it would have on me. He would look upset, guilty, miserable.. and then he would project and try to rub that onto me. I am empath. I have no medical training but I have dated so many messed up people. I am like a magnet to them. I have learned everything I know from my dating record.. he would be so sweet somehow but then same day and he would turn into an insensitive disgusting thing. And his whole personality would change by one single trigger.. and anything and I mean anything would trigger that change. But if he ever got caught doing something wrong then no matter what triggered him to change.. which also made him do the messed up thing to me... he would still use the stupid text message which I never reacted on.. although I could have... he did act.. without the text messages continuing.. but the part of the text message that bothered him.. was my response I deleted..so he made up all of the possibilities of what could have happened and although he didn't believe that I did anything.. he knew he had.. so if he let me off the hook for the message... what would he hold me guilty for? So he always used that. But ok.. so here's the biggest thing. He would text this other girl.. which was not allowed for me period. No one from the opposite sex, except my dad. But he messaged her plenty. But he deleted ALL of their messages.. and when I went to ask him about that, because he read all my messages to and from everyone all the time.. constantly asking me who was that, what did they say.. I mean ridiculous. Even when it was just a random meaningless notification.. anyway so when I asked him to read their messages which I knew they had messaged on multiple places say the phone, messenger, duo.. and all of them were erased and he was so smug 😏 and proud and it really made me feel sick to my stomach the way he would switch.. and go from this guy.. to that guy.. to THAT GUY. I thought I was going crazy for a while until he started doing it in my face. And called me while she was there beside him and talking nasty to me about what they were doing.. which they probably weren't at the moment but who knows..

  • @kuiniotepo
    @kuiniotepo 7 місяців тому +2

    Thank you Dr Ramani and Kyle. I've watched your videos over and over and found a lot of answers, strategies to handle family members that I have to deal with on a daily basis. The disorders around our community is prevalent and would've been overwhelming but through your discussions life is a hell of a lot more interesting (at my age) and bearable.

  • @juliecarter1587
    @juliecarter1587 5 місяців тому +4

    Wow. Best video I've seen. Every single point was a spot on description of ME. I'm a survivor, and have been diagnosed with severe PTSD from the trauma. Only way i got out was my husband suddenly and unexpectedly died. I still struggle with love/ hate & relief/grief even though it's been 4 years now. 😪

  • @kobieboshoff297
    @kobieboshoff297 3 роки тому +714

    I wish I have seen this video 43 years ago, would have saved me a lot of tears and unhappy years

    • @DrMoorehen
      @DrMoorehen 2 роки тому +25

      Kobie, I wish you well. Take care and stay safe xx

    • @Kaloapoele
      @Kaloapoele 2 роки тому +10

      ♥️

    • @mwbright
      @mwbright 2 роки тому +42

      No kidding. To find you´ve been victimized by these people for an entire lifetime is the most infuriating thing in the world.

    • @mikialila
      @mikialila 2 роки тому +15

      Kobie Boshoff: How awful, I hope for the rest of your years you are blessed with love and respect. ♡

    • @suzannelacy8093
      @suzannelacy8093 2 роки тому +6

      Kobie , Psychiatry has always been at the bottom of the pile and it's so unfair because if I think back to the early 1980s and the AIDs epidemic when thousands of people were dying it became the Cause Celebe of the century . Billions of dollars were raised , protests on the streets , rich and famous people backed research and now ( 2021 ) AIDs is no longer a Death Sentence except for the poverty stricken . My love 💕 to you and yours .

  • @vajufa
    @vajufa 4 роки тому +512

    Interesting how she says she avoids charming people at parties. I used to live in a lot of shared accomodation situations where we would interview lots of people as potential roommates. It got to the point that I would not allow exceedingly charismatic people to move in, because I had at various times in the past found these types of people to more likely be manipulative and users.

    • @icameinlikeawreckingball2504
      @icameinlikeawreckingball2504 3 роки тому +9

      Could you explain more? How would you tell if someone is “charming”? What traits make a person charming in your opinion?

    • @vajufa
      @vajufa 3 роки тому +103

      @@icameinlikeawreckingball2504 By charming I actually mean exceedingly charismatic. Specifically, people who on first meeting them center all their attention on you in an effort to make you like them. If someone you've just met makes you feel special in their presence, proceed with caution.

    • @vajufa
      @vajufa 3 роки тому +54

      @@urdadsleftasshole69 I said "proceed with caution"...I just mean if someone wants to manipulate you they will try to charm you first. Not all charming people are manipulative on the other hand.

    • @darinaangelova2882
      @darinaangelova2882 3 роки тому +16

      @@urdadsleftasshole69 lol, you're doing it right now.

    • @ryucrist139
      @ryucrist139 3 роки тому +13

      Psychopaths cannot form relationships ever as they dont care enough to begin them in the first place. Psychopaths cannot feel anger as anger is linked to a form of empathy even if be it to a part of yourself. A actual psychopath is a double edged sword as they can hurt others and or without realizing it and they also are easily taken advantage of because not being able to get angry and have any true self care means a psychopath will not care if you hurt them be it beating them, rape, and so on. The only time psychopaths have ever had positions of power or influence is because they were born into royalty or inherited massive wealth as a psychopath will not work with other people. They lack the ability to even care to work with people seriously in the first place. A psychopath wont even pretend to like people if it's to acquire power as again they cannot care enough to even pretend in that way. Psychopaths are very much live in the moment individuals and true long term goals are not possible. Psychopaths make good slaves and servants because they are incapable of caring about their safety and have no interest in achieving power and influence.

  • @tinahunt7127
    @tinahunt7127 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for these moments of instruction...very helpful.

  • @emilyannsarah
    @emilyannsarah 2 місяці тому

    I adore Dr Ramani, she is so knowledgeable and i almost find her voice calming.

  • @e.maevillalba6820
    @e.maevillalba6820 2 роки тому +437

    She speaks in a way I can understand, yet I can’t turn away because I am learning. I love how nothing is sugarcoated. Thank you so much.

    • @lindatyson7625
      @lindatyson7625 2 роки тому +5

      Bravo, I agree easily understandable speaker.

    • @kevino4372
      @kevino4372 Рік тому

      Physcopath

    • @marthadillman1632
      @marthadillman1632 Рік тому

      Fantastic explanation. Great and clear coverage. Thank you 😘

    • @pamelawilhelm870
      @pamelawilhelm870 Рік тому +1

      You nailed it 👍. She was who let me figure out he is a full blown narcissist. 😔

    • @barrymyers1433
      @barrymyers1433 Рік тому +3

      Have you seen the movie "I Care a Lot"? The museum were I worked for almost 30 years fell victim to a pack of psychopaths and some young people employed by us who had no morals or ethics who allowed themselves to be used to advance their own careers. To this day we don't know what they told the board but they managed to get us fired. At least we got a severance package. Though not much of one. The head psychopath who engineered all this was a brand new board member. No sooner were my boss and I fired and all the professional staff quit in support of my boss and me. Then this new board chairwoman turned around and fired the young people she had doing her bidding. They got a taste of their own medicine. The attack on the museum came from two fronts. First a wedding company run by a mafia boss from New Orleans and his business partner a female, wanted control of the museum. We were in an architecturally significant building which was the only space in town to hold large weddings of 300 people or more. The female partner started an affair with our then board chairman. Soon the mafia boss made this chairman a business partner where they set up a business called Ballroom LLC. Then the mafia boss got his personal high net worth private banker who works at Bank of America elected to our board. The former chairman was asked to step down as chairman to allow this new board woman to become chairwoman. The entire time she was grooming two young ladies to help with her real goal. These are the same ones she got rid of when they were no longer useful to her. That group is now running their for profit business through a 501c3 not for profit institution. The private banker is using the museum to launder money for her clients. I think anyone who read this much gets the drift. But believe me this is not nearly all of what went on. Thanks for letting me vent.

  • @teal1010
    @teal1010 3 роки тому +169

    ".....anything that feels like a hustle, is probably a hustle!"
    👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

    • @cgreen777
      @cgreen777 3 роки тому +2

      Instincts.

    • @authenticlife2223
      @authenticlife2223 3 роки тому +4

      Exactly!

    • @insidejah9293
      @insidejah9293 3 роки тому +1

      The saddest part is that Western society glorifies "hustlers, pimps, psychopaths, narcisistic behavior, and dark empaths"... Look at the most popular comic book characters, most popular movie characters, in fiction, in politics, in media, in Hollywood, in business. Our society often tells us that it's good to be hustled and you are just weak if you are not participating in the game. That is why so many people fall prey to these predators.

    • @scottdoty5734
      @scottdoty5734 3 роки тому +1

      These videos are en enormous hustle, this company is called Medline but has no Mds only PhDs pretending to be medical doctors.

  • @olderthandirt1
    @olderthandirt1 Рік тому +30

    Wonderful podcast. I was a child and adolescent therapist. I worked with servery emotional disturbed children for over 10 years then I went to work for hospice. I believe I could tell the difference between a sociopath and a psychopath. Most were sociopaths. I did have 2 brothers age 12 and 16. They murdered a mother and her son for quarters. They talked about it in class. I called the police they were both convicted.They both were out of control possibly gang members. There was 0 remorse in either boy The 2 were disruptive in class. They threatened me on a daily basis. Their mom for sure was in a gang. She was hardcore mean. She did not care at all what her 2 boys did. I hate to say this but when I made home visits I was called the no good white devil social worker it got so bad that my employer would not allow be to do home visits.

    • @piatasify8909
      @piatasify8909 9 місяців тому +2

      I feel society doesn't give enough thought to the terrible damage and suffering even a single psychopath with few means will cause.

  • @andreaanonymous5474
    @andreaanonymous5474 Рік тому +6

    I was told by a friend years ago, that he thought he had anti-social personality disorder. I wish I had known what it was then. I assumed based off of hearing the name that he was just a little anti-social. I didn't understand who I was dealing with. What I have been dealing with is someone sadistic and cruel that lacks all self awareness and has a complete lack of empathy. This experience has been a nightmare from hell. I really think it's time that the disorder is renamed to something more fitting to the kind of people that the label represents. I agree with Dr. Ramani.

    • @sarahmajor5945
      @sarahmajor5945 2 місяці тому

      So they know what they are and don't care.

  • @melaniearchival
    @melaniearchival 4 роки тому +355

    The most informative 2 hours of my life.

    • @MedCircle
      @MedCircle  4 роки тому +29

      Fantastic! We have a lot more from Dr. Ramani and other mental health doctors at MedCircle.com. You can access our large library for free.

    • @heytherewassup5608
      @heytherewassup5608 4 роки тому +2

      I didn't even realize it was 2 hours till I read ur comment.

    • @joselynleon3705
      @joselynleon3705 4 роки тому +2

      She is awesome

    • @MasterMalrubius
      @MasterMalrubius 4 роки тому +4

      @@MedCircle I very much like this format. Very well organized and presented. Do you have one on paranoia? Because now I don't trust anyone!

    • @jessicaa.6690
      @jessicaa.6690 4 роки тому

      @@MedCircle at 1:27:20 or so, what we you going to say that they don't like? You got interrupted & we want to know what you were going to say.

  • @catlady1589
    @catlady1589 2 роки тому +145

    My dad was a complete narcissist, recovered alcoholic and had intermittent rage disorder. My mom was a simpleton from a poor and uneducated family. She was completely dependent on my dad. There was alot of chaos which caused me to act out at times with temper flare-ups, rebellion and I avoided home by working part time after school and on weekends. I had lots of friends and activities. Though I had boyfriends I knew I couldn't marry or have kids because I had too many negative traits from my family. I read self help books and just hung on to an assortment of jobs until I could become financially stable, independent and whole. I listened to my intuition and did not allow society to push me into another cycle of dysfunction. I realized early on that my family was different. I knew I was on my own at an early age.

    • @nonah3215
      @nonah3215 Рік тому +6

      Same😢

    • @rachelallan503
      @rachelallan503 Рік тому +10

      I never wanted children, but I wish I hadn't been a victim of violent crime, it changed me forever. I went to a PTSD specialist, I feel I was almost too much for her, she had a charmed life and I just didn't so that was difficult. THANK you for the information.

    • @bluecollarlit
      @bluecollarlit Рік тому +2

      Cat Lady,
      Good for you.
      My cat Ginger says hello to your cat(s).

    • @pennycaldwell8141
      @pennycaldwell8141 Рік тому +7

      @catlady1589, Despite your family misfortune, you were able to create a personal success, and I thank you for sharing. As another human, I am uplifted.

    • @kennyhill2678
      @kennyhill2678 Рік тому

      Me and you come from a familiar background. My family is very dysfunctional. As well am I. Just tryna better myself,

  • @theshootindutchman
    @theshootindutchman Рік тому +3

    I work with someone I would surmise is in the antisocial personality disorder category and it causes no end of problems in MANY areas and has taken a huge toll on all of us who have to work with him. You are so correct about the difficulty of dealing with these people, and sadly as they won't realize their own problems, and it's nearly impossible to fire people these days....... if just to save companies from losing good employees who are leaving just to "escape" from this person......

  • @mashalazhar3070
    @mashalazhar3070 10 місяців тому

    Dr. Ramani is so good that I'm getting a positive response from her over my health.

  • @sarahangela444
    @sarahangela444 3 роки тому +194

    My Mother has antisocial personality disorder, NPD, and is absolutely a sociopath. I am still unraveling the abuse and I am 43. It has been extremely painful. This video was quite good. Thank you kindly.

    • @lindsaygonzales3598
      @lindsaygonzales3598 3 роки тому +6

      cant even imagine your experience. youre so strong dude!

    • @jennestes5494
      @jennestes5494 3 роки тому +6

      I can be sure you’re quite manipulative yourself then

    • @ydad1047
      @ydad1047 3 роки тому +13

      @@jennestes5494 May I ask what warranted this comment?

    • @whytho1534
      @whytho1534 3 роки тому +5

      How can your mom have Anti social personality disorder and sociopathy because ASPD is the clinical term for sociopathy they're the same thing lmao

    • @ydad1047
      @ydad1047 3 роки тому +3

      ​@@whytho1534 I am wondering whether her mother was ever clinically diagnosed with both Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Anti-Social Personality Disorder. Those suffering from either disorder, especially the former, are notorious for not seeking or outright refusing treatment of any kind. Furthermore, too many laypeople (attempt to) diagnose others in their lives or otherwise without the requisite and extensive background, schooling, knowledge, qualification, and certification to do so; and even then, proper, well-trained, and ethical licensing mental health professionals do not "diagnose" those whom are not their own direct clients (and whom they have not treated in some capacity) unless there is a substantial need to do so in order to facilitate growth and client awareness and accountability or in order to meet the stipulation(s) put in effect by their clients' respective private or state insurance agencies. With all this in mind, I would have to conclude that the commentator either misunderstood the dual diagnosis of Cluster B personality disorders given to her mother or the commentator determined the dual diagnosis for herself, either one of which explains her relative lack of knowledge or awareness regarding one aspect of the diagnosis (in other words, providing a clinical and an informal descriptor for the same disorder). What are your thoughts?

  • @user-ml3lo9nc9z
    @user-ml3lo9nc9z 4 роки тому +209

    Dr Ramani is saving people lives by helping us be aware of what is happening around us. I want to give her a big hug and say THANK YOU!

    • @MedCircle
      @MedCircle  4 роки тому +15

      Thank you for sharing. We let Dr. Ramani know about the feedback she gets. Thrilled that you are finding her content with us helpful.

    • @TheJdmartinjax
      @TheJdmartinjax 4 роки тому +1

      Really. Water and oxygen saved mine. Big oxygen fan here, tho. And water. . .

    • @Mia-rb5lj
      @Mia-rb5lj 4 роки тому +1

      MedCircle Please would you tell me how to get help, or were to get help on Narsctic abuse.

    • @garyweston3269
      @garyweston3269 4 роки тому +4

      @@Mia-rb5lj it is extremely difficult to find help, especially if abused by a narcissist. I have been. I have cptsd. I have a PhD therapist, paying out of pocket. It is extremely expensive. Even then, most in therapy are not properly vetted in these disorders as Dr Ramani is. Even PhD degreed therapists. Book knowledge is not the same as direct knowledge through experience. This is a reality of life. It isn't the fault of therapists. This is a difficult topic all around. Difficult to truly understand, and for most difficult to accept that such people truly exist. Psychopaths and such walk a line of reality barely within our existence, mostly within their own false existence. To understand them fully, and completely, is to be a psychopath one's self. To try to truly understand them, can make one lose touch with reality and cross into that very dangerous realm. Those like Dr Ramani are able to effectively navigate this minefield using science and logic.

    • @LanceLust1980HugeTheWarningFan
      @LanceLust1980HugeTheWarningFan 4 роки тому +3

      @@Mia-rb5lj Simply educate yourself. I had a narcissistic girlfriend, and helping myself to the many videos here on youtube is a worthy way to go.

  • @sleepingalongtherazorsedge9361

    I have aspd, in the sociopath area of it. I feel that people like me are treated like lame and infirm children in a bronze age Sparta. We get thrown out immediately, which just makes everyone else's problems worse. I've learned how to behave to effectively hold relationships and steady long term income and I've gone from being dirt poor to upper middle class in the last 6 months, only from learning what people expect others to do and say. Life is a huge learning experience till we die and I'm excited for the future, especially as I'm expecting my first child soon.

    • @Heenfio
      @Heenfio 7 місяців тому +1

      People make us look like we are not human

    • @rehemazabibu7493
      @rehemazabibu7493 3 місяці тому

      Yah they're a hug stigma with cluster b disorder that suck so I'm sorry

  • @brigittepauly0605
    @brigittepauly0605 16 днів тому

    I divorced a psychopath after 29 years! It’s been 2.5 years since the divorce and he still won’t let things go! Court was excruciating and he crushed me just like you stated! He is a high functioning healthcare c-level!!! Charmed the judge, his attorney, and my attorney!

  • @lewasil
    @lewasil 2 роки тому +338

    One day my uncle's neighbor came over, and the instant he came through the door, I had a horrible feeling about him. He sat next to me and I was so uncomfortable. I tried to avoid him all night, and the conversation was really weird and he was so opinionated and harsh. I couldn't shake the bad feeling I had. Later I told my uncle and mom how I felt. They dismissed me. Later that year, he was busted for stealing from the company, computers and other expensive stuff, plus, he would travel to Thailand under pretense of work, but he would go to brothels and sleep with underage girls. Some other things were found in his home after a raid I think. I knew he was a bad person. I felt it the instant I saw him. It was weird, but I am glad I have a radar going on. No-one else did.

    • @ultimateoptimist5217
      @ultimateoptimist5217 Рік тому +63

      Intuition and discernment never lie.

    • @gemmagreene362
      @gemmagreene362 Рік тому +57

      The ability to spot them is a gift. Always trust that intuition - it could save you so much pain and could even save your life.

    • @kevinmorley4924
      @kevinmorley4924 Рік тому +25

      Read the book, The gift of fear, by Gavin De Becker. You will totally relate.

    • @VastoLorde13
      @VastoLorde13 Рік тому +5

      Sounds like a chill guy to me

    • @ramushsteinuts9318
      @ramushsteinuts9318 Рік тому +2

      @@VastoLorde13 yeahhh sure think man. what had he done wrong? I didn't get it.

  • @RU-oq9mz
    @RU-oq9mz 2 роки тому +215

    And I had a relationship with someone who had literally 40 relationships within just a several year period. All of them ended with "that person was the problem" and then come to find out, they play the same game on you. They chew you up and spit you at as you said, don't care about you, smear campaign, discard/ghosting, etc. and yet this person is considered cheerful and loving, a "perfect" and outgoing person by everyone around them. Nevermind their drug addiction, trainwreck lifestyle every weekend and trail of broken people behind them. Yet no "criminal" history or signs that will alert you. But now I see they do have a rap sheet, they have those broken people behind them, the crimes of the heart they have not been convicted of.

    • @heidiho5179
      @heidiho5179 2 роки тому +14

      Some of them have others committing crimes for them. That’s a pattern with street pimps, for example. Better to send others out to commit crimes for you, and save your record is the mentality. My abusive ex-husband explained to me that “we” were going to ruin my credit, because we would always have his to fall back on. Of course, I was in no position to complain. I couldn’t believe the audacity and transparency of that statement!

    • @freedomforever1962
      @freedomforever1962 2 роки тому +8

      @@heidiho5179 How awful for you. Hopefully you are in the hands of a great therapist. Because a person needs a professional to guide them and help them recover. 💗✝️💕 Life is fragile handle with Prayer.

    • @Dtella55
      @Dtella55 2 роки тому +4

      Exactly...🎯🎯💯

    • @msladypmodel
      @msladypmodel 2 роки тому +2

      @Cher with Y.E.S. ikr yesssssssssss. 😍😍

    • @gooddogreallygooddog6157
      @gooddogreallygooddog6157 2 роки тому +2

      pov: blind to redflags

  • @mikethomas4570
    @mikethomas4570 Рік тому

    First time I watched, now subscriber. The knowledge she shares is so interesting, and comforting to me. Thanks

  • @rphillips500
    @rphillips500 7 днів тому

    When he said "I can't love you the way you want to be loved" was the first clue

  • @tpopbpop4917
    @tpopbpop4917 2 роки тому +256

    Ramani is my therapy. She just understands mental health and psychology and trauma so well that she leaves little room for confusion. She really is an expert in her field. Hands down the most respectful and honest.

    • @lauraelizabeth4444
      @lauraelizabeth4444 2 роки тому +16

      If your therapeutic journey is orientated around hearing someone just talk about diagnosis then I would kindly suggest perhaps your healing journey is yet to begin.

    • @gmcjetpilot
      @gmcjetpilot 2 роки тому +3

      You should get one on one professional help. Many states have mental health programs. Insurance will often also pay some therapy. Good luck.

    • @niruta---freeoftheiam913
      @niruta---freeoftheiam913 2 роки тому +1

      @@lauraelizabeth4444 Real change comes with behavioral.

    • @katieandnick4113
      @katieandnick4113 Рік тому

      Ha, definitely not honest.

    • @peachylady
      @peachylady Рік тому

      @@katieandnick4113 why do you say that?

  • @elizabethgracee
    @elizabethgracee 3 роки тому +520

    We need to implement more emotional intelligence in school systems. Kids will learn how to regulate their emotions and receive help if they need guidance in how to work through them in a healthy way.

    • @katkatkatkat463
      @katkatkatkat463 3 роки тому +41

      More? Is there some already? When I went to school there was none. You’re 100% right and if we don’t do this ASAP we will fail as a species; the psychopaths already run much of the world economy and will destroy us all.

    • @christianmaharajh2214
      @christianmaharajh2214 3 роки тому +5

      Absolutely. Tap into it before they get to be adults and go into society right!

    • @jefffarris3359
      @jefffarris3359 3 роки тому +13

      I agree but the public school system can only do so much. Good parenting is really the key.

    • @jp5419
      @jp5419 3 роки тому +11

      @@katkatkatkat463 100% the world is tun by psychopaths. Very scary!

    • @andreajewett1125
      @andreajewett1125 3 роки тому +2

      Yes! 😊💜💜💜💜💜💜

  • @deedeefoxydianedavidson7883
    @deedeefoxydianedavidson7883 Рік тому +3

    Thank you for this information, coming from an expert, Dr.Ramani, who expertise in personality disorders. Very interesting, and accurate. Thanks. ❤

  • @sapphirelorden942
    @sapphirelorden942 Рік тому +1

    your absolutely right, this is very validating, as i am co parenting with one. and everything you say Dr Ramani is on point. Thank you

  • @DDE_ADDICT
    @DDE_ADDICT 4 роки тому +104

    we so much need this knowledge on a public level

    • @SugaryPhoenixxx
      @SugaryPhoenixxx 4 роки тому

      This is a publicly accessible platform.

    • @lisavaden9903
      @lisavaden9903 4 роки тому

      @@SugaryPhoenixxx the statement means IT NEED TO BE TAUGHT ABOUT IN SOCIETY..

  • @karmakonnection5645
    @karmakonnection5645 3 роки тому +155

    I was in a relationship with 2 different types of people with mental illness, which has led me to embark on my degree in Forensic psychology. I respect Dr. Ramani and her research!

    • @francacianca7892
      @francacianca7892 3 роки тому +2

      so sorry for you

    • @fatimaharrison1955
      @fatimaharrison1955 3 роки тому

      It stems from a deficit of self love. SLD Speaking from experience

    • @Thregh
      @Thregh 3 роки тому +2

      So happy for you (i chose this interpretation)

    • @rosierb852
      @rosierb852 Рік тому

      Yes, my family was why I became a psychotherapist. And I ended up with 2 people like this

  • @endlessunivese9350
    @endlessunivese9350 Рік тому

    love how hard ramani works sh helped me well on you tube

  • @GamesNarcissistsPlay
    @GamesNarcissistsPlay Рік тому +6

    OMG!!! I laughed out loud when you were describing how when you use snail mail, you had so many opportunities to NOT SEND THE LETTER!
    I have 20 + letters, all hand written, signed and dated by the narcissist that are a road map to his insanity. I miss snail mail.

  • @FaithFashionFinances
    @FaithFashionFinances 2 роки тому +427

    I grew up with very emotionally and verbally abusive parents. My mother would often refer to me as a sociopath when I was a kid. In adult life when I worked through this stuff with mental health professionals I learned that the reason I I had trouble showing emotions so young was due to trauma from bullying ,racism and growing up in a family of alcoholics. this video is a great resource, Dr. Ramani's work has help me so much!

  • @beedabee1221
    @beedabee1221 2 роки тому +75

    “We’re better off focusing on patterns”. Wow now it explains why my therapist told me to always “stick to the facts” and it’s helped me tremendously in my healing.

  • @bxie5597
    @bxie5597 8 місяців тому +3

    She is so well spoken and articulate. So easy to learn from her. She’s a true expert!!!

  • @rebeccacorcoran7019
    @rebeccacorcoran7019 Рік тому

    Glad she mentioned DBT. Changed my life. Not BPD, Bi Polar. Taught me so much.

  • @awakedeborahandsing
    @awakedeborahandsing 2 роки тому +48

    Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that a person should keep them close enough to continue acting out against us.

  • @alijane6675
    @alijane6675 4 роки тому +279

    I am looking forward to this. I'm a massive supporter of Dr. Ramani. She has changed how I think of therapists, and those who seek them.

    • @MedCircle
      @MedCircle  4 роки тому +8

      I hope you enjoyed, Ali! There is a lot more from Dr. Ramani at MedCircle.com. 🙌

    • @Belialith
      @Belialith 4 роки тому +9

      Yea, she's REAL, not one of those fake one's only out to get your money (a psychopath, lol). Me too after I started listening to her. I started to realize there truly are good psychologists and psychiatrists out there.

    • @oXjoyXo
      @oXjoyXo 2 роки тому

      @@Belialith I bet she has not donated one penny to help anyone . See what she can do for others but not what others can do for her career

  • @thisshallpass7219
    @thisshallpass7219 Рік тому +1

    Been dealing with an individual for over a decade and things are becoming more clear as to what I am dealing with.

  • @rachaelb.
    @rachaelb. Рік тому +6

    Bravo to you two for talking about children and mental health. Apparently there is not enough research and studies done on children and their mental health. There needs to be much more studying done because there are keys that have not been unlocked yet in recognizing future mental health problems.

  • @marlenehellmann7458
    @marlenehellmann7458 4 роки тому +140

    Forgiveness is different then trust. I have forgive a friend, however I will never trust. I will walk away from them. I don’t wish wrong to come to them.

  • @guildfounder
    @guildfounder Рік тому +129

    The description of antisocial personality disorder is so consistent with what I endured from my sister 3 years my senior. Uses aliases, scams the government, manipulated and gaslighted every family member, instigated violence. I have been able to checkmate her behavior by documenting everything and getting my parents lawyer involved to end her manipulating them for money as they were slipping into dementia but it was hell for several years.

    • @nonah3215
      @nonah3215 Рік тому

      She is probably behaving that way coz she was abused by your parents, her behavior sounds like a trauma response. and you’re a lousy sister

    • @MacChicken-up2rl
      @MacChicken-up2rl 9 місяців тому +1

      Everything you mention sounds like me I wonder if it’s because of my disability and or have low intelligence I’ve heard that doesn’t help. I feel dumb because I decided to go on a 3 day alcohol binge and now I just stay in doors and not work I’m afraid of everyone it sucks. I think my family members are narcissistic though

    • @nv_chino
      @nv_chino 6 місяців тому

      ASPD is more than that. Should see my situation. Easily top 100 stories

  • @olibarrett4283
    @olibarrett4283 Рік тому +1

    I don’t like being a focus to anyone, but I think about silencing those thoughts in my head every day. I know I’m too old now but I’d want any young people reading, don’t leave it too late to find help before it’s ingrained and unchanging, you cannot teach an old dog new tricks. Don’t live with pain you don’t have to. Please. I love you brothers and sisters, I’ve never met you or interacted with you but I empathise with you. I know you in that I know myself. I wish you all the best.

  • @C.D.J.Burton
    @C.D.J.Burton 8 місяців тому

    Man she is fantastic, so informative and so helpful. I have learned so much from her brilliant articulation of these topics.

  • @bronwyntanner4501
    @bronwyntanner4501 4 роки тому +305

    Eggshells are a nightmare. Living with a person / a relationship with a person - with whom you cannot have decent communication is a total nightmare. It makes you nuts! I have been there. 14 years marriage to a passive aggressive covert narcissist who, with 7 therapists, looked like the paragon of virtue where I looked like the nut job. The 8th therapists recognised my symptoms! I was divorced and left a year later! Done and dusted. Living so happily alone with 9 animals!

    • @dontbelongherefromanotherp9807
      @dontbelongherefromanotherp9807 4 роки тому +2

      Ace

    • @koopspook
      @koopspook 4 роки тому +10

      Yeah they were the problem sure thing buddy

    • @tim3854
      @tim3854 3 роки тому +4

      meh, it's not that bad.. the ones with directed energy weapons on the other hand..

    • @ladybluelotus
      @ladybluelotus 3 роки тому +15

      Congrats on your freedom.

    • @davejohnson-yi2rk
      @davejohnson-yi2rk 3 роки тому +2

      How does one stay with a narcissist after year 1 ? Year 2? Year 3? Year 5? Do you see what I'm asking? It takes two to tango. I can understand a year or two or three, but 14 years?!?! You knew something was wrong but were in denial. That, and how long did you date before marrying this guy?
      Lastly 9 animals is about 7 too many. Sounds like you were traumatized but having that many animals isn't really a normal solution.

  • @ThePamgy
    @ThePamgy 2 роки тому +432

    "Prince charming are prince psycopathy to me" 🤣🤣🤣

    • @kristilambert3416
      @kristilambert3416 2 роки тому +8

      For real lol

    • @ReRe_642
      @ReRe_642 2 роки тому +11

      To good to be true run from these people

    • @rachaelspedding7622
      @rachaelspedding7622 2 роки тому +9

      What about Duchesses?

    • @annieg2863
      @annieg2863 2 роки тому +8

      "I was raised to be charming, not sincere" Quote from Prince Charming, Into the Woods from Stephen Sondheim.

    • @lizelli66
      @lizelli66 2 роки тому +3

      Well Said!!!!

  • @DeeCee1878
    @DeeCee1878 Рік тому +3

    Great informational video! Unfortunately, I can see from many of the comments, some people are intent on using words they like, without having gained any knowledge of what psychopaths, narcissism, and sociopathy actually are. From those of us who wish to learn and correct ourselves of uneducated thinking, thank you!

  • @NaNa-re3wc
    @NaNa-re3wc Рік тому

    I’m so grateful that out of all of those I have BPD. Having the capacity and willingness to experience deep, meaningful connections with others is the most beautiful thing life has to offer. I’m so grateful for my close friends. I’m also grateful that I experience empathy and lots of it as it enables me to better help my friends when they struggle. It deepens our bond which is so fulfilling. I resonated with Dr. Ramani on wanting lots of therapy and support, being open to help has changed my life for the better.

    • @littlemissgroove
      @littlemissgroove Місяць тому

      Ditto. The upsetting thing is theres so much stigma around bpd . People just don't understand it.

  • @vandykevicencio
    @vandykevicencio 3 роки тому +509

    OMG I love her, I took her class multiple times during my undergrad. She’s a great professor!

  • @kkheflin3
    @kkheflin3 2 роки тому +164

    I have always heard that "Forgiveness is not a FEELING. Forgiveness is a DECISION." It is so tough to make that decision.

    • @JOY-ye2us
      @JOY-ye2us 2 роки тому +7

      I think you can forgive them but not allow them in your life, or if you have kids with them forgive them but keep them at a diatance

    • @phyllisjohnson1019
      @phyllisjohnson1019 2 роки тому +1

      Yes.

    • @katherinewilson1853
      @katherinewilson1853 Рік тому +3

      @@JOY-ye2us In fact, it is compassionate to oneself to forgive them, and to remove them from one's life, if one's life is better that way. :). Making the decision to be strong for both of you is ok. You are a good person, and forgiveness is always for the person forgiving.

    • @JOY-ye2us
      @JOY-ye2us Рік тому +1

      @@katherinewilson1853 my daughter is a narcissist because everyone spoiled her including myself now that she’s almost 18 she lives with my sister cause she wants less restrictions. She didn’t invite me to see her in the band parade, she didn’t tell me when her prom was so I missed it. And she went to see he boyfriends mother instead

    • @Diewolustigist
      @Diewolustigist Рік тому +3

      For me forgiveness is the decision to have no bad feelings about someone.
      That doesn't mean that you don't be aware what this person has done, neither that you leave your guards down.
      It can be releasing to forgive and leave bad things behind you.

  • @soyicasweet99
    @soyicasweet99 6 місяців тому

    It’s good that you’re self aware. I commend you for doing these videos. I was with a guy for 2 years who has BPD and I really wish he gets treated. He’s a wounded boy inside who doesn’t trust anyone