Step on a Crack - Cyanide & Happiness Shorts

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  • Опубліковано 31 січ 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 10 тис.

  • @CoffeeMan678
    @CoffeeMan678 5 років тому +2511

    0:10 I just love how sudden it is

  • @CartoonHangover
    @CartoonHangover 10 років тому +15039

    That plot twist..... :O

  • @theretrodalek7361
    @theretrodalek7361 5 років тому +5624

    Ive always loved this one. Its one of my favorites

  • @ColonelBanana
    @ColonelBanana 3 роки тому +1168

    For those of you thinking he was leaving, he was not. He was going to go get some milk and cigarettes.

    • @SupremeST25
      @SupremeST25 3 роки тому +36

      Narrator: *he never came back*

    • @doggoplays9128
      @doggoplays9128 3 роки тому +10

      Milk and cigarettes :a yummy combination.

    • @stranger7907
      @stranger7907 3 роки тому +7

      He dead

    • @TropicalTester9
      @TropicalTester9 3 роки тому +7

      @@stranger7907 because his son step on the line! He was getting the milk! The milk! Lol

    • @-TheUnkownUser
      @-TheUnkownUser 3 роки тому +1

      Fuff... jesus lord, this make it less darker... thanks pal...

  • @SilverStarArcherDraws1212
    @SilverStarArcherDraws1212 5 років тому +8238

    The way she was staring at her “dad” after she broke her biological dad’s spine though...
    ...Was she trying to break his spine?

  • @friendlydark
    @friendlydark 6 років тому +6318

    i’m so glad this masterpiece was in my recommended again

  • @NeutralObjections
    @NeutralObjections 8 років тому +3518

    That initial scream was uncomfortably real.

  • @donkeymeme3309
    @donkeymeme3309 4 роки тому +2062

    When I was a kid I didn’t get why her dad was so happy about the other dude dying

  • @andrewesquivel
    @andrewesquivel 10 років тому +8238

    This really cracks me up

    • @Crawfishness
      @Crawfishness 10 років тому +240

      Bro, that joke is... _crossing the line._

    • @andrewesquivel
      @andrewesquivel 10 років тому +136

      gambolingman that joke was spine tingling

    • @joeydanvers2308
      @joeydanvers2308 10 років тому +19

      I broke my bsck

    • @JCLVB
      @JCLVB 10 років тому +14

      What kind of puns are we gonna encounter this time?

    • @wa-wa-wa-waffles2427
      @wa-wa-wa-waffles2427 10 років тому +39

      andrewesquivel C'mon guys, don't get all BENT OUTTA SHAPE!

  • @bcalvario5275
    @bcalvario5275 5 років тому +2521

    0:11 teacher: ok so today we have a test

    • @NotKakarot
      @NotKakarot 5 років тому +75

      3:04

    • @llbx_30yt72
      @llbx_30yt72 5 років тому +45

      @@NotKakarot there is no 3:00 it's only 1:00

    • @jrrussell7705
      @jrrussell7705 4 роки тому +18

      @@llbx_30yt72 that's the joke

    • @llbx_30yt72
      @llbx_30yt72 4 роки тому +9

      @@jrrussell7705 oh ok

    • @llbx_30yt72
      @llbx_30yt72 4 роки тому +7

      @C⃨h⃨x⃨x⃨r⃨y⃨ s⃨x⃨d⃨a⃨ ?

  • @petermarsella6537
    @petermarsella6537 5 років тому +5806

    It just occurred to me how dark that rhyme is

    • @elvectramsp7680
      @elvectramsp7680 5 років тому +143

      0:11 Oh my god!

    • @AaronPaulIbarrola
      @AaronPaulIbarrola 5 років тому +223

      Most kids rhymes are dark.

    • @beatvampire
      @beatvampire 4 роки тому +28

      @@AaronPaulIbarrola your right

    • @sonithguduru6445
      @sonithguduru6445 4 роки тому +56

      @@AaronPaulIbarrola like ring around a rosie

    • @pwrmoses
      @pwrmoses 4 роки тому +18

      @@sonithguduru6445 i dont get it can you explain

  • @bloof3701
    @bloof3701 4 роки тому +455

    I love the how dad assumes that his son is not his' either's lol

    • @GirlGolden4
      @GirlGolden4 3 роки тому +6

      @losmmn loserman …b/c the mom had at least one child w/another man.

    • @tomedy_official
      @tomedy_official 2 роки тому +32

      Two half-siblings become orphans

    • @MaskedButcher7
      @MaskedButcher7 4 місяці тому +2

      ​​@@tomedy_official I don't think their mom dead

    • @tomedy_official
      @tomedy_official 4 місяці тому +2

      @@MaskedButcher7 a broken back can be fetal, inturnal bleeding to negative respatory

  • @Enterurn4me
    @Enterurn4me 8 років тому +7466

    She just found her biological Father all by herself...

  • @kingnothing915
    @kingnothing915 8 років тому +4756

    Children's games: the ultimate truth serum.

  • @keving9569
    @keving9569 8 років тому +3686

    Well, she's got his hair color...

    • @k.shiesty2359
      @k.shiesty2359 8 років тому +68

      True and Hes bald

    • @orotoast6748
      @orotoast6748 8 років тому +61

      +Elijah Smith The bald guy wasn't her dad.

    • @k.shiesty2359
      @k.shiesty2359 8 років тому +27

      Aaron Portman Nope, The guy with the hose was her father

    • @k.shiesty2359
      @k.shiesty2359 8 років тому +10

      XGamingStormX :/ idk if you understood what i said man...

    • @BaeYeou
      @BaeYeou 8 років тому +33

      XGamingStormX Dude, why would he say "he's bald" when the original comment mentioned hair colour?

  • @marianogutierrez6709
    @marianogutierrez6709 4 роки тому +178

    The father just leaves the mother lying on the floor dead 👁👄👁

    • @cauchyschwarz3295
      @cauchyschwarz3295 3 роки тому

      What Spider Teen said and also she was not dead...yet. She only had a broken back. That may lead to internal hemorrage but um... yeah

    • @redepe3682
      @redepe3682 3 роки тому +16

      The mother cheated on him. That's why when that girl said 'break your father's spine', the orange shirt man's back breaks. So the girl's father is actually the orange shirt man and the man who got cheated on feels free.

    • @kantorpos258
      @kantorpos258 3 роки тому

      *The cheated one.

    • @concept5631
      @concept5631 6 місяців тому

      Nah she's still alive... somehow

  • @midnalazuli793
    @midnalazuli793 6 років тому +1415

    anyone else expect him to say "keep playing"?

    • @tratamiento4605
      @tratamiento4605 6 років тому +8

      Yes

    • @JASONAMANO
      @JASONAMANO 6 років тому +5

      Yes

    • @keirynic
      @keirynic 6 років тому +8

      Divyaraj Rajput what the fuck XD

    • @Chris-pp2xb
      @Chris-pp2xb 6 років тому +9

      Divyaraj Rajput you are obviously a child please leave the comments section

    • @yourdeath3194
      @yourdeath3194 6 років тому

      @@Chris-pp2xb XD

  • @StickiesOfficial
    @StickiesOfficial 6 років тому +1787

    She has her father’s hair color.

  • @humanbeing-nl9ih
    @humanbeing-nl9ih 7 років тому +3826

    Still one of my favorites to this day

  • @JulieandWill
    @JulieandWill 4 роки тому +236

    She cheated on him
    He isn't a parent so he YEET

    • @tatertot2667
      @tatertot2667 4 роки тому +12

      Like what I say
      “ if you cheat, he gonna YEET!”

    • @SitUrselfDown
      @SitUrselfDown 3 роки тому +16

      Well he was a parent. The son was his, that's why at the end you hear his spine break and he crashed his car

  • @Afritzl
    @Afritzl 10 років тому +487

    Wow what a "TWIST" but it sure had me "cracking" up!

    • @Afritzl
      @Afritzl 10 років тому +5

      Plot twist that wasn't the boys mom, so the man also cheated!

    • @voidNeutral
      @voidNeutral 10 років тому +2

      Quit making crack jokes, it to white.

    • @scemoperson333
      @scemoperson333 10 років тому

      nicccccccce

    • @Mr.Fox-OuterHeaven
      @Mr.Fox-OuterHeaven 10 років тому +1

      Storm twister STFU

    • @Josh-bl1iu
      @Josh-bl1iu 10 років тому

      Bravo *claps slowly* nice puns dude lol

  • @RedgraveKennedy
    @RedgraveKennedy 10 років тому +891

    Alright I have to admit this one was pretty damn clever.

    • @FernandoTorres-hb7qf
      @FernandoTorres-hb7qf 10 років тому +1

      Not as clever as NigaHiga

    • @video99apk
      @video99apk 10 років тому

      RedgraveKennedy But not original though

    • @Galaxia53
      @Galaxia53 10 років тому +2

      Donut Love You McSlutty I guess you just hate NigaHiga so much that you want to create hate towards him by mentioning him on videos that have nothing to do with him.

    • @FernandoTorres-hb7qf
      @FernandoTorres-hb7qf 10 років тому +1

      Lol damn hate for a comment saying NigaHiga

    • @FernandoTorres-hb7qf
      @FernandoTorres-hb7qf 10 років тому

      Ok im going to fuck a female dog

  • @riti9045
    @riti9045 6 років тому +3417

    0:39 when school finally ends

  • @fry_skyz6692
    @fry_skyz6692 4 роки тому +465

    The father just dropped his wife on the floor with a broken back and drove away😂😂😂

  • @jjyeewk
    @jjyeewk 10 років тому +187

    Man, when he got pissed at first about the neighbor, I thought he was about to get all bent out of shape.

    • @FernandoTorres-hb7qf
      @FernandoTorres-hb7qf 10 років тому +12

      Ba dum tsss

    • @Adhansstuff
      @Adhansstuff 10 років тому

      henry the eight

    • @jasonkelly1692
      @jasonkelly1692 10 років тому +6

      jjyeewk Definitely an unexpected TWIST. Sure is a PAIN in the neck. But it was so funny that it CRACKED me up.

  • @oscarcastillo337
    @oscarcastillo337 9 років тому +628

    This is by far my favorite one

    • @jarednahulu
      @jarednahulu 9 років тому

      Same!

    • @gentblue
      @gentblue 9 років тому +2

      Mr. Cod BOSS Junk mail ftw by a long, long way!

    • @Niya.B649
      @Niya.B649 9 років тому

      Same!!!

    • @Chisel1337
      @Chisel1337 9 років тому

      Mr. Cod BOSS I like "Public Bathroom"

    • @simonesilva4835
      @simonesilva4835 9 років тому

      +Mr. Cod BOSS yeah me too

  • @adome7799
    @adome7799 6 років тому +1889

    I guess she crossed the line. I'LL leave

  • @eclipsyz1249
    @eclipsyz1249 4 роки тому +69

    He just left his “daughter” though she did nothing 😂

    • @akina4575
      @akina4575 4 роки тому +10

      He was too happy to notice it, he was happy because his back didn't break and also he found out that his wife cheated

    • @stevensallsorts
      @stevensallsorts 3 роки тому +11

      Not his daughter

  • @lynseycooke4560
    @lynseycooke4560 8 років тому +407

    Well... This is how you tell who your parents are

  • @no-kf8yy
    @no-kf8yy 5 років тому +1186

    Jesus Christ.. the screams and gagging from the mother is gruesome.

  • @owltoe0164
    @owltoe0164 8 років тому +1882

    this video sure had me *cracking* up. I'll definitely be *back* for more.

    • @homieturtle9069
      @homieturtle9069 8 років тому +13

      Did sans hire you to make that joke!

    • @owltoe0164
      @owltoe0164 8 років тому +4

      Homie Turtle maybe

    • @lackinggnat
      @lackinggnat 8 років тому +25

      Lovewaffle Give me a *break*.

    • @akariuz195
      @akariuz195 7 років тому +2

      Lovewaffle OF WITH HIS HEAD!!!

    • @akariuz195
      @akariuz195 7 років тому +2

      Homie Turtle Pure Cringe. Buy now for only $0.99

  • @somethingsuable
    @somethingsuable 2 роки тому +45

    I love how they take innocent humor and make it all dark lol

  • @JEAthePrince
    @JEAthePrince 6 років тому +1249

    Alright, we got the first DNA test in.
    And for little Patricia, YOU are *NOT* *THE* *FATHER!*
    WOOHOOO!
    As for young lil Tommy, *YOU* *ARE* *THE* *FATHER!*
    Oh my spine!

    • @candy5398
      @candy5398 6 років тому +2

      Wow lol!!

    • @CringeDealer69
      @CringeDealer69 6 років тому +3

      I read that in the voice of Jeremy Kyle 😂

    • @candy5398
      @candy5398 6 років тому

      @goff0103 ikr

    • @bleachkun5140
      @bleachkun5140 6 років тому

      *666 likes* oh no it the DEVVVVVVIIIIIIILLLL let the power of Christ compelled you

    • @callmewhatever7778
      @callmewhatever7778 6 років тому

      @@bleachkun5140 I see it too

  • @EuniceAsante245
    @EuniceAsante245 8 років тому +198

    My first Cyanide and Happiness video

  • @DaDualityofMan
    @DaDualityofMan 6 років тому +720

    Was I the only kid who made sure to avoid stepping cracks thinking it was gonna happen lol?

    • @gabbih1512
      @gabbih1512 6 років тому +39

      Fifty Faces of Manning was I only kid who tried to step on every crack I saw?

    • @DaDualityofMan
      @DaDualityofMan 6 років тому +24

      @@gabbih1512 Ah I see, mommy issues.

    • @gabbih1512
      @gabbih1512 6 років тому +13

      Fifty Faces of Manning eh not really. Just wanted to see of it was true 😆

    • @introvertedangel8524
      @introvertedangel8524 5 років тому +2

      Nope

    • @bernardoheusi6146
      @bernardoheusi6146 5 років тому +3

      No I stopped being retarded when I was seven years old

  • @exhorciists
    @exhorciists 4 роки тому +29

    It took me a few seconds to realize what was actually going on 😂

    • @FedezStories
      @FedezStories Рік тому

      please explain it's been 6 minutes

    • @nightmarephotonegativemickey
      @nightmarephotonegativemickey Рік тому

      @@FedezStoriesmother cheated to have her daughter but when she had her son he actually had the dad that drove away i think

  • @holidayonion
    @holidayonion 10 років тому +218

    I was NOT expecting that.

  • @Diana45251
    @Diana45251 6 років тому +307

    😂 well at least one of the kids is his 😂😂😂

    • @jaila5751
      @jaila5751 6 років тому +2

      Diana45251 lolll

  • @bradandez
    @bradandez 10 років тому +494

    Saw it coming...
    Still laughed.

    • @BravePvP
      @BravePvP 10 років тому +119

      You did not fucking predict this

    • @MikedaddyO
      @MikedaddyO 10 років тому

      stfu you fucking bitch

    • @royrieder2113
      @royrieder2113 10 років тому

      M. Huang Hey she's brave, don't give her guff

    • @bradandez
      @bradandez 10 років тому +5

      Brave Of course I did.

    • @bradandez
      @bradandez 10 років тому +5

      M. Huang Get back to the sweatshop.

  • @Cheeseboy1967
    @Cheeseboy1967 4 роки тому +13

    I don’t know why but cracking the back and spine sound so satisfying

  • @crystalm4482
    @crystalm4482 7 років тому +3362

    Well that was messed up

  • @C2G2X
    @C2G2X 8 років тому +126

    YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!!!!

    • @chasehill6492
      @chasehill6492 8 років тому +1

      Mitsuka Twoearle now I get the joke when she step on a Lin and break your father's spine she meant her other dad

    • @luisnava9615
      @luisnava9615 8 років тому

      Mitsuka Twoearle po

    • @josephbuirkle7173
      @josephbuirkle7173 7 років тому

      Ether step dad or my comment above

    • @plunger8343
      @plunger8343 7 років тому +2

      The DNA results are in!

  • @abrahamtesfaye6818
    @abrahamtesfaye6818 9 років тому +122

    It would've been funnier if it was the mail man.

  • @keziahs.6346
    @keziahs.6346 4 роки тому +11

    His facial expression at 0:37 tho-
    😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @Magmabloxing
    @Magmabloxing 8 років тому +2116

    My baby sitter told me that when I was a kid... never stepped on a crack ever again.

    • @vicmanson9314
      @vicmanson9314 8 років тому +33

      when I got mad i would step on one believing it was true

    • @Magmabloxing
      @Magmabloxing 8 років тому +19

      hayley parish xD you wanted to paralyze your mother?

    • @vicmanson9314
      @vicmanson9314 8 років тому +14

      +Magma Charge yes. okay I was a mean child

    • @Magmabloxing
      @Magmabloxing 8 років тому +16

      hayley parish No you were a murderous child...

    • @vicmanson9314
      @vicmanson9314 8 років тому +10

      +Magma Charge okay true because I would step on every crack I saw.

  • @Platin_2004
    @Platin_2004 8 років тому +65

    "Not my kid, not my wife, fuck it!"

  • @ThatBoyDrew22
    @ThatBoyDrew22 6 років тому +1158

    What was that sound effect at 0:36 called?

    • @Frankyshs
      @Frankyshs 6 років тому +103

      I got u too 100 likes and idk what the sound effect is...

    • @SharkieMania
      @SharkieMania 6 років тому +150

      snake Gaming darude sandstorm

    • @RegularInvader
      @RegularInvader 6 років тому +48

      I believe it’s a type of ‘suspense’ sound effect.

    • @gamertime4949
      @gamertime4949 6 років тому +17

      Music sting

    • @aliciabrowne8500
      @aliciabrowne8500 6 років тому +21

      It's called darude sandstorm

  • @xxdevourstarxx6583
    @xxdevourstarxx6583 4 роки тому +6

    0:34 when your sister steals the last cookie

  • @miss705brandy
    @miss705brandy 8 років тому +1687

    I am shocked that so many people actually don't get it.

    • @JohnDoe-mv1sm
      @JohnDoe-mv1sm 8 років тому +83

      Brandy Nevil it's so obvious

    • @samdoubleview7628
      @samdoubleview7628 8 років тому +34

      Then tell those who don't what it is

    • @lorenat4775
      @lorenat4775 8 років тому +22

      Brandy Nevil I think I get it but what do YOU say it is

    • @ccas12
      @ccas12 8 років тому +38

      Are you sure? It's not a hard subject to comprehend.

    • @youtubeloverforever1761
      @youtubeloverforever1761 8 років тому +5

      Brandy Nevil lol

  • @madsharkz8640
    @madsharkz8640 5 років тому +2822

    Plot twist: the neighbor was the uncle
    *ALABAMA 100*

    • @pollogaming919
      @pollogaming919 5 років тому +24

      Mad Sharkz sweet home Alabama

    • @SilentRoadStudio
      @SilentRoadStudio 5 років тому +31

      Her father is her uncle lol #Alabama

    • @22dolls19
      @22dolls19 5 років тому +10

      Her father is her grandfather

    • @jordanhewson8287
      @jordanhewson8287 5 років тому +5

      That doesn't mean its Alabama you mong because the wife isn't blood related to the mother.

    • @chloewagner5572
      @chloewagner5572 5 років тому +7

      @@jordanhewson8287 I guess you didn't get the joke

  • @overcookedwater1947
    @overcookedwater1947 6 років тому +648

    Legend says those kids are orphans now

    • @d.j.w2600
      @d.j.w2600 6 років тому +27

      @Velociraptor Blue that's not what orphan means. It's means when a child has no living parents

    • @MrParkerman6
      @MrParkerman6 6 років тому +23

      Not true, you can be an orphan if your parents abandoned you, they don't have to be dead.

    • @calamity6386
      @calamity6386 6 років тому

      That pfp scares me

    • @darkball31
      @darkball31 5 років тому +2

      the mom just has *a broken back* not the end of the fuckin world there. it's the spine that's the bad part of it

    • @lol_d_in_the_house6227
      @lol_d_in_the_house6227 5 років тому

      @Victor Marinescu I THINK SOMEONE STUCK THEIR TONGUE OUT IN THE RAIN CAUSE I THINK YOU BROKE YOUR BRAIN!!!!

  • @Kenzo21gaming
    @Kenzo21gaming 3 місяці тому +13

    0:51 Bro forgot if he's has an other kid

  • @koochiefriedrice
    @koochiefriedrice 7 років тому +311

    This was pretty spine chilling.

    • @bigmaxnel2141
      @bigmaxnel2141 6 років тому

      ÇørrüptêdÜsêr. exe wow

    • @Cried2dreamagain
      @Cried2dreamagain 6 років тому

      I got chills down my spine for sure 😆

    • @DeLaffitte
      @DeLaffitte 6 років тому +1

      nice pic

    • @micahgarnett1924
      @micahgarnett1924 6 років тому +2

      It cracked me up

    • @jumpiestudios5265
      @jumpiestudios5265 6 років тому +1

      @@micahgarnett1924 That was a good pun, I would actually give it a like if that'd be something I would do.

  • @Tommy-gk6bh
    @Tommy-gk6bh 8 років тому +2085

    And youuuuure, not the father.

    • @lainwarisa
      @lainwarisa 7 років тому +1

      +Frozen Krystal lol

    • @justmechanicthings
      @justmechanicthings 7 років тому +14

      oh my god...that went completely over my head until I read your comment.

    • @kg-km1ch
      @kg-km1ch 7 років тому +1

      "you are"

    • @kg-km1ch
      @kg-km1ch 7 років тому +9

      LYNX NORWAY get a life !

    • @jesusmolina8187
      @jesusmolina8187 7 років тому

      LYNX NORWAY get life! Smh

  • @summer5928
    @summer5928 10 років тому +237

    That made my day, I was laughing so hard my parents spanked me for being too loud

    • @10willybilly
      @10willybilly 10 років тому +30

      What are u 5 and what's wrong with ur parents they don't let you laugh wtf is wrong with them

    • @piratefoxcaptain
      @piratefoxcaptain 10 років тому +3

      William Navarrete my parents were like that too. It was stupid ad hell haha

    • @murderthemassacre
      @murderthemassacre 10 років тому +16

      anthony flores thats hot,wish i had parents like yours

    • @hitlerspenpal9822
      @hitlerspenpal9822 10 років тому +13

      murderthemassacre uh......

    • @PLazz257
      @PLazz257 10 років тому +15

      1337haxxorz 9000 just let him have his moment

  • @purplestpurple
    @purplestpurple Рік тому +1

    THESE VIDEOS WERE MY CHILDHOOD

  • @brandoncliburn767
    @brandoncliburn767 9 років тому +257

    this really CRACKED me up
    I'll leave...

  • @arturoroman5225
    @arturoroman5225 6 років тому +505

    What has me dying is that the moms hand is twitching😂😂💀💀

  • @aliyaht1331
    @aliyaht1331 6 років тому +745

    Dude as a kid I thought this was a real thing, I avoided so many cracks, I was such an idiot🤦🏻‍♀️

    • @lucasdamntheman4317
      @lucasdamntheman4317 5 років тому +33

      Oh boy, same here bro. 13 years later and I still wonder how I could have been so stupid. 🤣

    • @lucasdamntheman4317
      @lucasdamntheman4317 5 років тому +14

      Same here bro. 13 years later and I still wonder how I could have been so stupid 🤣

    • @pringlesboi2961
      @pringlesboi2961 5 років тому +8

      Oh boy, same here bro. 13 years later and I still wonder how I could have been so stupid. 🤣

    • @pringlesboi2961
      @pringlesboi2961 5 років тому +7

      Same here bro. 13 years later and I still wonder how I could have been so stupid 🤣

    • @emeraldemmitt7637
      @emeraldemmitt7637 4 роки тому +7

      Did you just switch accounts?

  • @robbsparks9792
    @robbsparks9792 3 роки тому +5

    This will never stop being funny 😂

  • @lordbeerus3383
    @lordbeerus3383 6 років тому +2843

    Shit I would of been happy too.

    • @scottwatson9669
      @scottwatson9669 6 років тому +49

      Lord Beerus he still got a kid

    • @jumpiestudios5265
      @jumpiestudios5265 6 років тому +63

      No, you would HAVE been happy too.
      How do so many people not realize that "would of" makes no sense? What you mean is would've, the short version of would have.

    • @scottwatson9669
      @scottwatson9669 6 років тому +71

      @@jumpiestudios5265 stop trying to be a smart ass

    • @periodt-3-321
      @periodt-3-321 6 років тому +14

      Jumpie Studios your comment didn’t make any sense

    • @greenfilly
      @greenfilly 6 років тому +31

      @@periodt-3-321 It makes perfect sense you imbecile.

  • @ovnbun1981
    @ovnbun1981 10 років тому +406

    "Welcome to the 301+ saloon shall I get you a drink?"~

    • @StormyCloudz
      @StormyCloudz 10 років тому +1

      Yes, I would love to have a whiskey

    • @tornadotrance
      @tornadotrance 10 років тому +18

      Stormy Cloudz TWO WHISKIES, now how about a story?

    • @Saylor28
      @Saylor28 10 років тому

      I'll have a Manhattan, not too sweet.

    • @sabz20005
      @sabz20005 10 років тому +3

      I'll have a fanta

    • @alvinahn4244
      @alvinahn4244 10 років тому +12

      Juice box for me

  • @VCRK888
    @VCRK888 8 років тому +97

    My first cyanide and happiness video!

    • @ravex24
      @ravex24 8 років тому

      I'm sorry that not all of the vids will be as great as this one but welcome to the fam.

    • @xavierhorn9825
      @xavierhorn9825 8 років тому

      Mine too!

    • @VCRK888
      @VCRK888 8 років тому

      +mijnisme It felt... interesting. I didnt get it at firsy, and then i loved it!

    • @LieRenThePope
      @LieRenThePope 8 років тому

      Well, prepare for emotional shit and dark turns, you're in for a hell of a rollercoaster!

    • @VCRK888
      @VCRK888 8 років тому +1

      +Skull Sniper (SkullSniper) But I'm afraid of roller-coasters...

  • @ofire913
    @ofire913 4 роки тому +2

    Thats why iiiiiii looooove *NESTLE CRUNCH* 0:10

  • @kuliet
    @kuliet 7 років тому +954

    Wow i didn't know that the mom had 1,709 accounts.

    • @bundthead
      @bundthead 7 років тому +10

      Princess Sparkle what

    • @goodgame3887
      @goodgame3887 7 років тому +24

      Bundthead i think shes pointing out the dislikes is the mom

    • @cindyvaleyiloj6666
      @cindyvaleyiloj6666 7 років тому

      Kuhg8gei307y7r828tz\÷;#*!_+€=:'( :-( :-| :-\ :-P 🎅🎄🐎🐋😒😌💔😂😌💔☺😗😗😗😚😘😰😞😜😳😒😒☺😔😒😗😗😭😝🐰🐷🐹🐨🐮🐻🐰🐨🐒💽💗💋💋💋💘💖💙

    • @lotusuvu906
      @lotusuvu906 7 років тому +3

      Princess Sparkle 2,000

    • @jaimzandchantelledyit206
      @jaimzandchantelledyit206 7 років тому

      Princess Sparkle i

  • @dreamsprayanimation
    @dreamsprayanimation 8 років тому +80

    Who else thought the girl was going to get killed by the hopscotch?

  • @chuchu6397
    @chuchu6397 8 років тому +820

    This really *cracked* me up

    • @danblogger5824
      @danblogger5824 8 років тому +7

      Fireice Godjira:D .......OF WITH HIS HEAD

    • @mimeyman80
      @mimeyman80 7 років тому +4

      BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    • @breezycheese3677
      @breezycheese3677 7 років тому +2

      FireIceSans Productions Kogeru Liberator -_- no just...no

    • @dariosanchez2715
      @dariosanchez2715 7 років тому +1

      FireIceSans Productions Kogeru Liberator ahí are you

    • @cameronburk4867
      @cameronburk4867 7 років тому

      FireIceSans Productions Kogeru Liberator I get it

  • @Hs-md1bn
    @Hs-md1bn 4 роки тому +68

    I’m a mean mean person for laughing at this and and enjoy it

  • @Jofoyo
    @Jofoyo 8 років тому +453

    Hey, those weren't lines! Those were line SEGMENTS!

    • @BigClayBoi
      @BigClayBoi 8 років тому +1

      +Anthony Augustin nerd

    • @prettyyinpunk0
      @prettyyinpunk0 8 років тому

      +Fruit Hey, it's true!

    • @WM_46
      @WM_46 8 років тому

      +Drew Manson Doesn't that mean every mark is a line unless it's perfectly square?If it's wider than it is long, then from the other perspective it's longer than it is wide.

    • @Guadalupe-fv8rh
      @Guadalupe-fv8rh 8 років тому

      Hehehehe xD

    • @Jfreek5050
      @Jfreek5050 8 років тому +10

      #AllLinesMatter

  • @brendabrooks2250
    @brendabrooks2250 7 років тому +580

    you are not the father

    • @the_jingo
      @the_jingo 7 років тому +15

      I'm your father

    • @cameronalford565
      @cameronalford565 7 років тому

      I was just going to comment that

    • @the_jingo
      @the_jingo 7 років тому

      Rogg The Dogg lol

    • @dovis9427
      @dovis9427 7 років тому

      But he was that boy's father

    • @its_nuked
      @its_nuked 7 років тому

      Brenda Brooks charmx

  • @melodyghoulz
    @melodyghoulz 4 роки тому +2

    Me when I forgot I didn’t have a garage door 0:41

  • @Aarohms
    @Aarohms 6 років тому +200

    I just can’t *crack* the code

    • @imnotausername4700
      @imnotausername4700 6 років тому

      *Ranbow readers sound comes up*

    • @Gryn990
      @Gryn990 5 років тому +3

      I edited this comment so the replys will make no sense

    • @areleafz9638
      @areleafz9638 5 років тому

      Sarcasm on the next level.

    • @asomegamerurbista7863
      @asomegamerurbista7863 5 років тому

      Um sorry but bad joke

    • @theninja7786
      @theninja7786 5 років тому

      Boethiah Covin it does make sense lol. You didn’t get the joke huh

  • @imarginacionmxd
    @imarginacionmxd 4 роки тому +656

    muy interesante

    • @Ray-tt1ye
      @Ray-tt1ye 4 роки тому +5

      Hola, ablas Eningles

    • @chuuriitoos
      @chuuriitoos 4 роки тому +4

      Jajaja por fin Alguien Español ^^

    • @not194
      @not194 4 роки тому +2

      Bdndnsksm no c de qe c trata el video alguien me explica? ;;

    • @chuuriitoos
      @chuuriitoos 4 роки тому +1

      @@not194 yo te Explico

    • @chuuriitoos
      @chuuriitoos 4 роки тому +6

      Se trata de que una niña estaba jugando y dice: *salta hace crack y rompele la Espalda a tu mama* (por lo que entendi yo :u), y él padre Dice: Deja de jugar porfavor Deja de jugar! Y después la Niña dice: salta Hace crack y rompele la espalda a tu Papá y. En vez de que se le rompiera La Espalda Al Sr. Calv0 se le rompe la espalda al vecino 🤡 despues el hermano mayor dice "donde fue papa? ._." y pisa el suelo y Crack se le rompe la Espalda al Padre _F I N_

  • @sydneynicole5240
    @sydneynicole5240 8 років тому +31

    Lmfao the look on her face when he drove off 😂

  • @xxoxorubyy
    @xxoxorubyy 4 роки тому +53

    When he finds out that she cheated on her he is like "this Biss"

  • @ant.242
    @ant.242 4 роки тому +63

    LMFAOOOO the way she looked at her "dad" after stepping on the line

  • @doofnetwork6197
    @doofnetwork6197 8 років тому +94

    I think Maury would've been easier.

    • @k.shiesty2359
      @k.shiesty2359 8 років тому +9

      Totally, Maury Would have been "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!!!!" and then he would be Embarrassed on Tv.

    • @nikolmiller01
      @nikolmiller01 8 років тому +1

      l love your videos

  • @adamnorthwood1673
    @adamnorthwood1673 8 років тому +66

    so the daughter is the the child of the neighbor next door and the boy is the son of the guy who drove off

    • @yonkocommandersmoker9240
      @yonkocommandersmoker9240 8 років тому

      lol

    • @Niom_Music
      @Niom_Music 8 років тому

      FeArlessGamingStudios Yur a gaud dang jeeniuz

    • @adamnorthwood1673
      @adamnorthwood1673 8 років тому

      not really

    • @adamnorthwood1673
      @adamnorthwood1673 8 років тому +5

      what I said is pretty straightforward the guy next door broke his spine because he's the father of the daughter and when the son stepped on the line the guy who drove off broke his spine the mother did it with the husband and the neighbor how more straight forward can I get

    • @twentyfivelettersinmyname5547
      @twentyfivelettersinmyname5547 8 років тому +7

      Paintball SKILLZ i see,you are a kid.thats why you dont understand

  • @carleyjoiner8871
    @carleyjoiner8871 4 роки тому +1

    I love the mother's scream💞😊

  • @torachan23
    @torachan23 10 років тому +221

    The original "father" (the guy who took off rather happily) would still be able to be put on child support by the mother, since he "took on the role as father"

    • @torachan23
      @torachan23 10 років тому +8

      Clawyf It seemed like the guy in the green shirt was actually raising her, since they lived in the same house and is participating in stereotypical father activity (watching the kid play).
      The neighbor is the biological father, but green shirt guy was actually raising her, therefore being the "father by default" in the court's eyes

    • @XxdoggyshitxX
      @XxdoggyshitxX 10 років тому +42

      omg its a comedy short why are you talking about that ....

    • @torachan23
      @torachan23 10 років тому +31

      XxdoggyshitxX op I think how stupid our laws can be is comedy. The ridiculousness is laughable

    • @XxdoggyshitxX
      @XxdoggyshitxX 10 років тому +2

      Tora Chan but why would matter on a C&H video

    • @torachan23
      @torachan23 10 років тому +20

      XxdoggyshitxX op Because I have the freedom to comment whatever I want on any video I watch...?

  • @baileeharding8886
    @baileeharding8886 5 років тому +46

    0:40 he went from really pissed to really happy...damn

    • @khaos5085
      @khaos5085 5 років тому +1

      Well he did find out he wasn't the father.

    • @sharr630
      @sharr630 4 роки тому

      To really broken spine...

  • @casshmoneez4832
    @casshmoneez4832 6 років тому +305

    0:38 that face tho 😂 😂 😂

    • @fanboyyourguy
      @fanboyyourguy 6 років тому +8

      When your dad says your out of pizza rolls

    • @toast3374
      @toast3374 6 років тому +8

      When you invite her to play Beyblades with you and she starts taking her clothes off

    • @fanboyyourguy
      @fanboyyourguy 6 років тому +5

      When you ask her to smash and she comes over without her 3DS

    • @shiningstar737
      @shiningstar737 6 років тому +1

      When you’re tinder comes over, and she isn’t under 10 years old

    • @kayleybishop6497
      @kayleybishop6497 6 років тому

      Me when I realize my sister took my fucking top again

  • @xraku3744
    @xraku3744 3 роки тому +1

    becoming an orphan speedrun

  • @prettykaylak
    @prettykaylak 7 років тому +1324

    I TOTALLY GET IT

  • @K.nikeyaa
    @K.nikeyaa 8 років тому +135

    Now people don't have to use DNA tests to try and figure out if the child is theirs or not 😂😂😂

  • @ryangianola5454
    @ryangianola5454 8 років тому +25

    This is one of my favorite ones

  • @yameznonpartisan7557
    @yameznonpartisan7557 3 роки тому +3

    This is the sketch that started it all for me. I've since seen every sketch that comes out. How pissed the dad looks gets me every time

  • @DSilvandoBlade
    @DSilvandoBlade 8 років тому +76

    stay away from cracks and lines kids

    • @DSilvandoBlade
      @DSilvandoBlade 8 років тому

      ***** wait if you lick an ass crack does the same rules apply?

    • @williamhawkins6504
      @williamhawkins6504 8 років тому +20

      Damn I'm addicted to crack

  • @stephanieveloz6212
    @stephanieveloz6212 5 років тому +156

    I use to believe this and I would step on a crack on accident then I would come home and ask my mom does her back hurt

    • @flying_gorilla8069
      @flying_gorilla8069 4 роки тому +2

      Is it true?

    • @marcydawn0_o
      @marcydawn0_o 4 роки тому +5

      @@flying_gorilla8069 no lol

    • @coleencarey3243
      @coleencarey3243 4 роки тому +2

      @@flying_gorilla8069 it's not true I didn't even find out until maybe yesterday which is Thanksgivingl

    • @scaracunt
      @scaracunt 3 роки тому

      @@AngelxBunni that's wholesome, I wish my family had the same humor

    • @jlammetje
      @jlammetje 3 роки тому

      Wait, this is an actual rhyme kids sing?!

  • @catbeautiful2770
    @catbeautiful2770 4 роки тому +23

    *Parents die*
    Their kids:In term of money,we have no money 😂

  • @compassionate100
    @compassionate100 6 місяців тому +1

    Listening to this with headphones on is so slightly different with the sounds at the end being much sharper and more real,, it's funny af

  • @Re4LDeaL
    @Re4LDeaL 8 років тому +283

    This joke has crossed the "line"

  • @alip82
    @alip82 10 років тому +285

    This is NOT predictable, if you said you predicted this, you are lieing

    • @thesealofyourdreams
      @thesealofyourdreams 10 років тому +15

      english is not your native language i take it?

    • @eternalreminisce
      @eternalreminisce 10 років тому +7

      I look at the comments specifically to see people saying how predictable the cartoon was. Don't you ruin this for me!

    • @fettuccineTTV
      @fettuccineTTV 10 років тому +4

      have you really never heard of the saying "step on a crack break your mothers back" nor "step on a line break your fathers spine"?

    • @AlexTheTallTree
      @AlexTheTallTree 10 років тому +12

      ***** This is the internet, which is used globally and English isn't used everywhere. No need to comment on people's ability to speak English over the internet..

    • @metaitachi
      @metaitachi 10 років тому +1

      The title is "Step on a Back", the video starts with a girl skipping and repeating the known saying "step on a crack break your mother's back" and then it happens. Then bad things continue to happen when she steps on more stuff. It's not exactly a out-of-left-field joke.

  • @ShadowKing887
    @ShadowKing887 8 років тому +45

    Cheat on him and you break your limbs

    • @ShadowKing887
      @ShadowKing887 8 років тому

      Cheat on her and you lose your bones

    • @iberat
      @iberat 8 років тому

      ShadowKing887 N.E.G.

  • @twitchybristles
    @twitchybristles 3 роки тому +4

    "THAT'S WHY I LOOOOOVE...NESTLE CRUNCH!"

  • @chillpanda1847
    @chillpanda1847 7 років тому +200

    Good job kid u just found ur biological father !!🎉🎊🎉

  • @emilygalvez2500
    @emilygalvez2500 5 років тому +95

    0:29 The plot twist realizing his wife cheated 😂

    • @generalgrievous2165
      @generalgrievous2165 5 років тому +1

      E for Emily 0:26*

    • @lemex27gamesnshit
      @lemex27gamesnshit 5 років тому +8

      *Thats the joke*

    • @computernoober7823
      @computernoober7823 4 роки тому

      groans4u4 shut up man your the cringe right here

    • @user-no7vm8of3s
      @user-no7vm8of3s 4 роки тому

      @@groans4u419 why tf did you write your comment in his comment?
      Cringe!
      GET REKT A**HOLE

    • @user-no7vm8of3s
      @user-no7vm8of3s 4 роки тому

      @@groans4u419 you DO realize this is rat life's comment section R I G H T?

  • @bucketlists291
    @bucketlists291 8 років тому +105

    Stop cracking jokes.

  • @inspacewithanidiot7693
    @inspacewithanidiot7693 4 роки тому +1

    Her face was so blank and empty.
    This is one of my favorites.♥️♥️👏👏

  • @livlmao508
    @livlmao508 8 років тому +47

    It took me longer than it should have to understand this joke