Watching this feels like accidentally entering someone's room while they are crying, and you find yourself unsure on whether or not you're also allowed to cry.
"One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies" We didn't realize. But Unus Annus being gone had an effect on not only us. But the creators. We all miss it. But Mark and Ethan worked for a year on it. We were just along for the ride. Unus Annus. Memento Mori
@@informitas0117 bro, op made a comment, not a declaration on the standing of everyone who Was There. you didn't have to add this. it really didn't do anything but make some people feel dumb.
We all had to spend a year with only are thoughts. Without the rush of the normal day to day life people couldn't push down and ignore thus realizing that they are not ok( myself included in this).
Truly how did we. I was depressed starting 7 years ago, starting from 2013/14 until half way through 2019, which was horrible cause I am only 17 now gonna be 18 in October. But half way through 2019 I found myself again and built up so much confidence and pride in myself, only to have it all stripped away again in 2020. It has been a really hard time but not harder than others have had it. Everyone's been through some real rough shit, but the important thing is they are still standing here, willing to still march on.
This past year has given me so much time to think to myself and it's been really unfun realising that there may not actually be any hope for this planet. I'm trying so hard to not be a nihilist but every time I look at the news it gets worse and worse. Fuck man, I don't know anymore.
Ethan: I’m not really feeling like I wanna get lit Us: tell us how you’re feeling Ethan: well I feel like shit Us reacting to this rewrite: woah?? Shit! (Sorry I instantly thought of this when reading your comment lmao)
"not suicidal but not alive at all" owie that hurt my heart...I felt that. More so than ever. Update: since I didn't expect this to be highlighted; Too anyone who's feeling like this it will eventually get better, you matter and you are loved.
@Abigail Neely no. Not true at all. Different experiences for different people. But Bo’s fits better with the guitar melody and has more quality. The contents of the songs themselves are up for opinion.
"No more self improvement, cause your not aloud to grow" "not suicidal but not alive at at" and "a year of creativity erased as the timer died" Hit really hard
It’s a shame that the viewers who complain about any changes UA-camrs make don’t consider how what they say affects those UA-camrs. I hope, as viewers get older, they can stop looking at content creators through 2014-2016 colored glasses.
I feel like I should tell everyone here that Ethan said on his Twitter that this song reflects his feelings of a few months ago, and that he’s feeling much better now.
“not suicidal, but still not alive at all” this rlly resonated with me, i've felt like this for the past few months at least we love you ethan, we hope you're okay
@@levlee5481 When I came out as nonbinary my mom supported me, but she doesn't want me to transition and it's obvious she still sees me as a girl :/ although i cant 100% relate to your experience i understand how difficult that can be. If you still live with your parents i hope things get better for you. I hope you find happiness and support, even if your parents dont provide that for you
The fact that Ethan referenced Unus Annus tells you that Ethan is struggling letting go of Unus Annus. It was a big deal to him and it was a big deal to all of us. I wish it didn't end.
I think the most special thing about it is how difficult people are finding it to let go. It means they succeeded in their efforts to make a physical metaphor for death.
"Not suicidal, but not alive at all" Holy shit. That's a feeling I never thought could be put into words. Even worse is when you try to describe it to someone and they either make you feel terrible for your feelings or they just shrug it off like it's nothing.
That's the problem with talking about mental health. We all have problems feeling happy and fulfilled but when other people have these problems to the point where they speak out. It some how almost always falls on deaf ears. It's a sucky thing. But the one thing we can do is our best to take care of ourselves and try to be there for others. If we care about them or not. Their a human reaching out. And I wish people remembered this. Just know your not alone. I've had to write off all my friends, all of my family including my brother I gave years of my life up to raise for my parents. But nothing I did mattered. I was lucky enough to find my wife. And she's all I need. On my bad days I have that one person to lean on. And she has her bad days as well. But community's like this help alot. Where people at least try to care. Twitch and UA-cam community's as well as reddit has probably saved my life more times than I care to mention. Sorry for the long reply. You just struck a chord with me. And I felt a need to reach out and ensure you our kind is out there. If we have nothing else in common theres a feeling of isolation that we understand others don't. And that means alot to me. So I thank you for sharing your response. This song and comment meant alot to me. And I definitely needed this today.
@@dollsjj7481 I'm sorry but I saw just your name and your reply not the comment that is was replying to in my notification and I was like... there is so much that this could be responding to like bro LIFE hits hard
Sounds dumb to say because everyone says it but i hope you guys feel better. This shit sucks and it’s horrible that people have to go through low times. My heart goes out to anyone that feels this way.
I have 00:00:01 permanently tattooed on my wrist. Its the thing that got me through the hardest time of my life and that i will be forever thankful for. Its not completely at zero because i can still pretend its not gone if its always at one
So true haha but we also have to remember that it was hard for Ethan and Mark. They created so many memories and fun times that will never be able to be seen again.
@@faeyarosethorne2716 well I think they could be a serious reference though, bc if you think about it he spent an entire year doing so many different unique things with Mark and sharing it with people, and then having it suddenly end and all the work they put into it is gone except for their memories of it
@@kayladanforth9201 my thoughts exactly. It was exactly one year that was literally erased as the timer hit zero. It seems pretty black and white to me. Pun not intended.
reading these comments with ethan singing in the background is a whole other feeling. it hurts while also somehow being comforting in a twisted way and its just such a funny feelinf (badum chhh im sorry im not good with feelings) but there arent even words to express everything i want to
“Hold back tears when your parents try to call” that punched me in the gut, I’m so sorry Ethan. I can only imagine how terrible it’s been for you. I know people hate it when people call them brave, but holy shit. The transparency in this song is admirable, you’re such an amazing guy
“One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies” this hit me like a fucking truck. a lot of points in this hit me really hard. like i didnt anticipate getting teary eyed but here i am crying
"One year of creativity erased..." hits me more than just Unus Annus. I was part of a large writing/role playing group for a year and a day. We met nearly every single day to write and create a world together. By the one year mark, there was a lot of fighting among a few of us and it became so bad that I finally had to escape and left the group. We had a webpage built to keep track of lore and characters and I went back to gather my characters' information only to find things I spent time on erased and changed. It hurts so much to have something you once loved so much become a wild, increasingly foggy memory with not much left to show for it, no matter how it ends. I'm still searching for a new passion, and I hope all the others out there searching for a new one may find one or many to love. Thank you for sharing this beautiful rewrite, Ethan
i relate so hard tbh 😭 me and my old friend group would make dnd campaigns together, and I was the dungeon master in a lot of them, but it feels bitter revisiting any of the ideas bc of the memories associated w them. it really was a wonderful year of creativity, all gone now
I love seeing how many people Bo Burnham has inspired with his newest special. His songs truly struck a deep chord that resonates so strongly with how people have felt this past year and a half especially.
I KNOW! It's insane seeing this as a huge Bo Burnham fan. I'm glad that Bo put out another special and that he's getting closure from well known people.
My fiancee passed away this month. She got me into Unus Annus last year. Every single day, we'd share the new videos with each other. We watched the finale together while cuddling in a hotel room, trying not to cry. It meant so much back then.. but now? I only had a year with her as my girlfriend. One year. She loved Ethan and Mark, and loved showing me her youtube interests. We bonded over you guys so much. We were going to get matching tattoos, do an Unus Annus themed wedding, etc. Thank you for being a part of making something that can bring people closer together, and remind us our time is finite. Those memories with her are all I have now, and I'll never forget them. I loved her so much. Thanks, Eef. I love you.
I can't imagine that pain just yet but I know it hurts, for many 2020 is a year to remember for sadly more reasons than just covid. And yeah, things might not go back to the way they were, but god damn it they will be better.
Where I live it was super late when it ended and I fell asleep, missing the ending. When I woke up I realized what happened and started crying. I really didn't want to miss it but I did, I went to the channel in my subscriptions and there was nothing. The only evidence of it was reuploads and screenshots I'd taked. It hurt but I had to move on with my day.
I'm really loving all of these self-written verses people are writing to this song. Bo really gave a lot of people a song to vent their feelings through, and I love that. Bo is a musical genius, not just comedy-wise, and so is Ethan.
"Not suicidal but not alive at all" This is honestly one of the most heartbreaking and relatable lyrics I've heard in a while. Ethan, this is beautiful, all the love and support man. Hope your doing well.
"One year of creativity erased as the timer dies" As a [REDACTED] fan this hit hard. And I can only imagine how hard it was for Ethan and Mark to say goodbye.
“No more self-improvement cause you’re not allowed to grow” is such a good line. To me, it had two meanings. Cancel culture refusing to really look at if somebody has changed. And the constant infantilization of Ethan. He is an adult, and still a lot of his fans see and treat him as a kid. A perfect example is when he posted a picture of his dinner and everyone was acting like “there’s no way this sweet child could cook something, who let him near the stove, he’s gonna burn himself uwu” and it’s fucked up. Forced infantilization isn’t fun in the best of times, but compounded by thousands of people treating him like he can’t take care of himself, it must be so much worse.
Welcome to the world of neurodivergent people, where we're infantilized constantly and people think we're giant babies that need 24/7 supervision and guidance despite growing up and going through horrible traumas that mature us like everybody else.
It took me listening to this song like 7 times to realize he was talking about himself then I just completely went blank. We forget that people with platforms have problems too and it’s not fair.
I 100% agree with you. There were some bits where he talks about the struggle of losing Unus Annus. So many people think Mark and Ethan don't struggle with that as much as they do, which is frustrating. It was an amazing creation, but it was deleted with good intention, despite the sorrow it brought.
I think the reason Ethans version hits harder for most of us because we know more about Ethan and not as much about Bo. We connect with Ethan because we've seen more of him and we know more about him. We connect with him because he's shared a lot of his life with us, he's closer to many of our ages. We know the things he's referencing and have similar struggles. In short, we just connect with him more and understand what he's singing about Just my personal thoughts, if you disagree that's ok. I would love to hear other opinions though on what you all think too
I think it's also compounded by the fact that Bo seems to be speaking of the impending doom of the world weighing and dragging on not only himself, but the collective, while Ethan is speaking more to the personal weight of life on an individual level.
I actually know more about Bo than Ethan as I've been obsessed with Bo since last year. Both songs are equally hitting hard in their own way. Ethans songs about personal life, how it's hard growing up. Bo's is about the world, how everything's fucked and there's not much to do about it. Personally I like Bo's version more as I'm more focused on how the world is just shithouse, but sometimes when I think about to myself I enjoy Ethans more.
@@BitterJoyXx I've followed Bo's career since his early UA-cam days (we are from the same state and he was gaining local recognition back then before he got a wider audience) and Ethan's since he first started appearing on Markiplier's channel, so from someone who has seen them both through their best and worst times and through all that they've put online and out into the world about themselves and their struggles, both versions hit my heart hard. Bo's does speak more to the world at large than to his personal struggles, however both are difficult and heavy and deep.
I agree, both resonate with me, but I feel the personal problems are much harder to face, you can know exactly what's wrong and still not be able to get past your problems by your self, but the world has a chance to change, yes it's terrible but it's so much easier to see the world getting better then seeing yourself get better which made me like Ethan's version much better, every word spoke to me. Not saying we can't get better, just saying it's easier to invision a better world then a better self.
"Peaked at 24", the Unus Annus line, and "not suicidal but not alive at all" hit... way too hard, holy shit. Incredible job Ethan Edit: This comment was to let Ethan know how much I appreciated his performance (performance, which means him singing the song, not the song itself; I saw the credits, I know it's Bo's), not to have a discussion about what meant what, please stop commenting random stuff on this, lol.
“One thing that gave you hope, you have to say goodbye. One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies” ...ow Too real. UA was that for me and you really have to call me out like that.
As I get older, rewatches of this video just hit me harder and harder. A lot of the emotion is a lot more relatable to me as an adult, and it also just gets more and more clear to me how vulnerable and open he made himself for this rewrite. God damn
> Always remember that you matter. I said this in a reply to another comment, but my 21st is coming up soon, and I genuinely didn't think I'd live this long. I'm not suicidal anymore, but I still have the ideation. All the time. I want to get better but none of what makes me feel this way is in my control. Like fun fact - 500 companies are responsible for over 90% of the total carbon emissions on Earth. We're in a global heat wave right now and still a lot of people don't think climate change is real. I live in severe poverty and nothing will end that aside from a communist revolution. I just want to know what FEELING alive is like. Just for a day.
I think ... that other creators(or just people in general) who can relate to this could record themselves singing the same song, and perhaps it could add up to a rather meaningfull, if slightly sad compilation of real feels.
"Not suicidal but still not alive at all" I think that line alone can describe the way a lot of people have been feeling, especially this last year with this whole pandemic. We love you Eef, we hope you're ok and that you stay safe!
Lyrics Your in the life you dreamed about you made your parents proud Now go suppress your anxiousness and say "hi" to the crowd Don't let them notice That you've faked another smile give them any hope you had and starve just for a while There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling Murder Hornets Deadly Virus Bush Fires And The Wall Scroll right past the post about the shooting at the mall Updates with your parents Group morale is getting low No more self-improvement Cause you're not allowed to grow The one thing that gave you hope you have to say goodbye One year of creativity erased as the timer dies Endless doubts, Intrusive thoughts You've peaked at 24 Can you reach fulfillment When you're always wanting more There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling Never ending twitter feed Never ending likes Realize you've lost passion as the numbers start to rise Never clean the dishes cause you only eat alone Zoom call with your therapist While scrolling through your phone Total dissociation Fully out your mind Days go by in seconds cause you've lost all sense of time Hold back your tears each time your parents try to call Not suicidal but still not alive at all There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling (sigh)
Felt fitting to come back to this after the one year anniversary. Reminds me even more that as hard as it was for us to let Unus Annus go, it was 10 times harder for Mark and Ethan. Momento Mori
"no more self improvement, cause you're not allowed to grow" felt like such a callout to the people on twitter who cancel everyone, and I loved it. hope you're doing ok man I love you
Exactly! I've had two of my favorites cancelled last year and had so many sleepless and tearful nights because of this shit! It really became that bad that I've started to really doubt myself 😖
But.. if you looked at the description you'd see it was a rewrite from bo burnhams show "inside"... doesn't mean its not good but i think its based off of that.
LYRICS: You're in the life you dreamed about You made your parents proud Now go suppress your anxiousness and say hi to the crowd Don't let them notice that you faked another smile Give them any hope you had and starve just for a while There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling Murder hornets Deadly virus Bushfires and the wall Scroll right past the post about the shooting at the mall Updates with your parents Group morale is getting low
No more self improvement cause you're not allowed to grow One thing that gave you hope you have to say goodbye One year of creativity erased as the timer dies Endless doubt and intrusive thoughts You've peaked at 24 Can you reach fulfilment when you're always wanting more There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling Never ending twitter feed never ending likes realize You've lost passion as the numbers start to rise Never clean the dishes cause you only eat alone Zoom call with your therapist while scrolling through your phone Total disassociation fully out your mind Days go by in seconds cause you've lost all sense of time Hold back your tears each time your parents try to call Not suicidal but still not alive at all There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling There it is again That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling That funny feeling
Yeah, the pain will never stop. Although I get their message, it's so hard to let go of it for some reason, even though it's just a UA-cam channel, it felt like a comfort zone 😕
That shakey sigh at the end broke my heart. We love you, Ethan. Thank you for doing everything you do. And remember, if you need to take another break for your mental health, do it! Your mind and body are more important than pushing yourself to make content.
“No more self improvement, because you’re not allowed to grow”, and “not suicidal, but still not alive at all”. Those two lines are just my life right now. “Days go by in seconds 'cause you've lost all sense of time” is true for me as well, days either go by like a snap, or drag on forever, and I just feel l8ke I’m stuck in an endless hole of suffering at all times
@@RandomUserYTisFailing I don't think it's quote as Literal as someone isn't allowing you to grow necessarily. That line means a lot to me personally cause I'm stuck in a place where everything is kinda all the same, so it's hard for me to improve because nothing is really getting me to improve if that makes sense???
"Don't let them notice that you've faked another smile" To be honest Ethan this hit me hard like a cement block hitting my head. I fake a smile almost every time.
Revisiting this after the Outtakes were posted by Bo is like a punch to the gut. "Days go by in seconds cause you've lost all sense of time .... Not suicidal but still not alive at all " manages to make me cry more now than it did 9 months ago when I first watched this Everything got better and worse all at the same time That funny feeling never leaves does it?
@@izzybell3349 of course not but I would love to see him go on a podcast and check out some of what his fans have made, maybe he'd go back on the h3h3 podcast at some point
"Days go by in seconds 'cause you've lost all sense of time" hit me really hard. I've been stuck in a depressed state for as long as I can remember and one of the things I've always struggled with is time.
Me too, my calendar has been stuck on May because I can’t find a reason to change it if the months go by so quickly, by the time I even change it, it’ll already be may of next year.
The not suicidal but still not alive at all really got me. This past year has really made me realize the difference of being alive and feeling alive. Just being alive is just to survive and feeling alive is actually living. Love you so much. Your videos have kept me going this past year.
Really sounds like him and mark need to work together again. I’m a bit worried about Ethan feeling alone, and mark has always seemed to help with that.
Did he just say that Unus Annus helped him forget about everything he's talking about?? Funny that this video was uploaded on one of my worst depressive days
@@cwisqy_ when I listened to this I was around my family and they don't know about the depression so I had to hide how I was feeling. Very big acts of crimes against ourselves. Hope you're doing okay.
@@kirstin3573 i’m at my brothers bday party and my uncles family doesn’t know so yeah i feel your pain, i hope you’re doing well, if you need anything i’ll be happy to listen
You’re probably feeling alone in life Ethan but just know we are all here for you. Your line ‘peaked at 24’ is just a thought your brain put in your head. You are still growing as a person and we’re all gonna be here with you as you continue to grow. We love you Ethan!!!
"A year of creativity erased as the timer dies" 🤍🖤 I was only able to catch that line the second time I watched the video, it was a great addition to the song :)
"No more self improvement because you're not allowed to grow." Has this pandemic stunted anyone else as their lives were about to start? I've made no progress in 2 years
I started college as a straight a student and failed out in my second semester. I've never felt worse than I do right now. The pandemic really did fuck us all.
@@saltedsage I’m really sorry to hear that, even putting aside the tragedy of mass illness and death, it’s messed up people’s lives so much. I haven’t seen my bf in years because we’re in different countries and my job has been put on hold because it’s still illegal to travel, I’m just getting poorer and less experienced against my peers
I was about to start college, then covid happened and I couldn't face starting it in an online setting. Then I got attacked by somone in my life and kicked out by my mom. Now I'm trying to build my life again from the ashes but it's tough man. I have a job but I"m totally alone no friends. it's been a rough year for everyone.
@@parisofhades7348 "It's never too late" is one of those cliche sayings but I thought about that alot... Started college in 2013 and failed because of various factors and no direction/desires. Felt like everyone would shame me, etc. I wallowed in a state of confusion and depression for a bit and had given up hope. Then, I told a family friend who I trust that and he reacted differently from all the other people in my life who silently judged that I flunked out. He said, with a contagious smile, "I was in your shoes not long ago you know.. It's never too late." It brought hope back that I may still have a chance at making something of my life regardless of the time I lost and suddenly time became irrelevant in my decisions from then on. I decided to explore in community college classes without worrying about majors and requirements. Got interested in a different major than before and followed through. Graduated May 2020 just before the pandemic and managed to get hired couple months into the pandemic because I never let that interest go and it showed in interviews. So, when stepping back out of the current time and looking back 4 years, I went from complete dispair, feeling hopeless and out of control to being on a track where I get to grow professionally and intellectually. Just by really embracing that it's never too late, for anything. Hope this personal experience can bring some lost hope back
@@saltedsage I graduated in 2020. Didn't get a prom, didn't get to do what I wanted before graduating, didn't get a graduation. And I dropped out of College my first year cause I couldn't handle online college. I understand the feeling. I'm so sorry
“Not suicidal, but not alive at all.” Can definitely relate to this line A LOT. The pandemic has brought any and all self-esteem has been lost and has fallen dramatically. I had goals to lose weight but lack of motivation and depression wouldn’t let me. It got to the point where I just felt dead inside
Oh yeah, it definitely is. I got hit hard during Covid and I don't think my family and friends quite understand that I still haven't recovered, that I don't feel I'll ever recover. Also, I love that game too!
"Not suicidal but not alive at all" - that hit. Also losing time and days are blurry. I have felt that all through my adulthood. I'm 25 and already had burnout at my last job. You hit the right spot with that Ethan and that with a truly beautiful song. Thank you for that.
Because you know the feeling. It's like the feeling of realizing that "home" is no longer the place where you rest and prepare for the future, it's where you decay. "Never before have we been so connected, yet ever felt so alone" Everyone is singing the same song, but we can't harmonize. What Ethan did here, was exactly that. He broke through to you.
@@theordinary1059 Shit. This hits deep because I was living at home (14-15yo) during covid last year and went further and further downhill until i went to hospital for a week and now I'm in a different place because back home, i was decaying that funny feeling
@@ilikebreadsticks1880 Same bro im 14/15 and my family life isnt bad but I went through 5 years unconnected with my own mother and now that I'm with her it doesnt connect the same way espiaclly through covid, keep going man much love
Bo’s version: literally sobbing
Hearing Ethan sing it too: sobbing AGAIN
and it’s different from the original, too
To be fair Ethan is... so....good
Hi wife
@@mossborne Babe 😳
Watching this feels like accidentally entering someone's room while they are crying, and you find yourself unsure on whether or not you're also allowed to cry.
This is perfect
I would like to think we're also allowed to cry 😭
Exactly! Like, should I comfort them? Leave them alone? Sit with them and cry? This is painfully perfect.
Ethan’s just letting it all out today, in the most beautiful way.
Couldn’t have described it more perfectly
Ethan Nestor covering a Bo Burnham song my life is fucking complete.
Hahaha
The internet one and All Eyes On Me.
@@DewdleBob. welcome to the internet?
@@Plagolago64 welcome*
@@Badbadtoby827 oops
"One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies"
We didn't realize. But Unus Annus being gone had an effect on not only us. But the creators. We all miss it. But Mark and Ethan worked for a year on it. We were just along for the ride.
Unus Annus.
Memento Mori
Maybe you didn't realize but the rest of us did.
@@informitas0117 bro, op made a comment, not a declaration on the standing of everyone who Was There. you didn't have to add this. it really didn't do anything but make some people feel dumb.
@@disneykid7557 Some people just be like that
@@disneykid7557 the internet is full of buzzkills
That was the whole point. Memento Mori is their life.
"Not suicidal, but still not alive at all" Damn Ethan that hit a little too close...
Good
Dude I know, I was thinking the same thing
Damn
Damn Im so depressed haha
Ikr 😟
it’s terrifying how many of us relate to the “not suicidal but not alive at all”, how did we get to this awful, awful place.
We all had to spend a year with only are thoughts. Without the rush of the normal day to day life people couldn't push down and ignore thus realizing that they are not ok( myself included in this).
20000 years of this, 7 more to go.
Truly how did we. I was depressed starting 7 years ago, starting from 2013/14 until half way through 2019, which was horrible cause I am only 17 now gonna be 18 in October. But half way through 2019 I found myself again and built up so much confidence and pride in myself, only to have it all stripped away again in 2020. It has been a really hard time but not harder than others have had it.
Everyone's been through some real rough shit, but the important thing is they are still standing here, willing to still march on.
This past year has given me so much time to think to myself and it's been really unfun realising that there may not actually be any hope for this planet. I'm trying so hard to not be a nihilist but every time I look at the news it gets worse and worse. Fuck man, I don't know anymore.
@@SofaKingGasPriceSpike can’t tell if that’s sad or relieving.
us: "tell us how you're doing ethan"
ethan: * posts bo burnham rewrite song*
when i clicked on it that’s what i thought it was tbh
Ethan: I’m not really feeling like I wanna get lit
Us: tell us how you’re feeling
Ethan: well I feel like shit
Us reacting to this rewrite: woah?? Shit!
(Sorry I instantly thought of this when reading your comment lmao)
Thank you for describing the video I had no idea what it was until I saw your comment
He is his own person...
"I'm not really feeling like I wanna get lit
(Tell us how you're feelin')
Well, I feel like shit"
"not suicidal but not alive at all" owie that hurt my heart...I felt that. More so than ever.
Update: since I didn't expect this to be highlighted; Too anyone who's feeling like this it will eventually get better, you matter and you are loved.
Same!
I feel that-
Do I matter?
I don't think so.
@@theentertainer678 you do!
@@agentxkentucky Thanks.
“One year of creativity erased as the timer dies”
IM SOBBING ETHAN
IKR I WAS LIKE DONT HURT ME
i feel like a train just hit me
Same
Memento mori.......friends.... :'))
Momento mori
“Not suicidal, but still not alive at all”
That line hit way too hard..
Same man......
me too.
@That One Bean a dream smp fan I see 🤔
Yeah..
Stay strong everyone. I'm sending prayers yalls way. You all have beautiful happy lives ahead of you. God bless yall 💖
Bo's version: Made me tear up.
Ethan's version: Absolutely ripped out my heart
Same
@Abigail Neely I mean, you didnt have to go that far.
@Abigail Neely Okay, now this is too far.
@Abigail Neely no. Not true at all. Different experiences for different people. But Bo’s fits better with the guitar melody and has more quality. The contents of the songs themselves are up for opinion.
@Abigail Neely They can both be masterpieces, without you relating to one or the other tho...
"No more self improvement, cause your not aloud to grow" "not suicidal but not alive at at" and "a year of creativity erased as the timer died" Hit really hard
I stumbled upon this comment exactly when he said it
It’s a shame that the viewers who complain about any changes UA-camrs make don’t consider how what they say affects those UA-camrs.
I hope, as viewers get older, they can stop looking at content creators through 2014-2016 colored glasses.
All of these got me especially as a creator I don’t know, it just hit hard
this kinda made me realize that im in that not alive at all state and been in it for the last 5 years
This was really great Ethan.
Agreed
Best "cover" I've seen so far
I want to cry a million tears for this UA-cam family. These times are so hard.
Agreed.
God damn it Ross, you're right.
“Not suicidal but still not alive at all” ripped straight through me
Same
Ditto
@rachael ferrando omg hi bestie
God how I feel that. This year has been my lowest, and sadly, being realistic it probably has been for many others too...
@rachael ferrando omg hey bestie
“don’t let them notice, that you’ve faked another smile.”
that hurt.
i love your pfp :D fundy appreciation!!
@@itshannah711 b ... bestie read the room /lh
I like Ur pfp :D
But it is so true.
@@Kodogaron JSBSJHS😭😭
“never clean the dishes cus you always eat alone” hit hard
I feel like I should tell everyone here that Ethan said on his Twitter that this song reflects his feelings of a few months ago, and that he’s feeling much better now.
Thank you for saying this. I was worried about him but I’m so glad he’s ok
Glad to hear it. But I'm also glad he's getting the emotions out and not holding them in.
Commenting to boost this!
I still wanna give him a bear hug and just listen to him vent T-T everyone needs a good vent/cry hug
This comment needs more attention, I think that s provides some pretty important context^^^
“not suicidal, but still not alive at all”
this rlly resonated with me, i've felt like this for the past few months at least
we love you ethan, we hope you're okay
same tbh..
You two should check the real thing by Bo burnham then lol, it's on Netflix called "inside"
@@Reyalsnomed013 yeah man already checked that out. that special is a masterpiece
I feel this so much lately. I hope you're okay
Same. well said.
"No more self-improvement, because you're not allowed to grow." Hit me way harder than I thought it would
Read this as he sang it
Agreed. As a ftm trans kid who’s parents don’t support me, it took on a completely different meaning and brought me to tears
@@levlee5481 that's amazing. I'm glad it could have that effect for you. As a content creator who is also a MTF trans girl it pretty hard too.
@@levlee5481 When I came out as nonbinary my mom supported me, but she doesn't want me to transition and it's obvious she still sees me as a girl :/ although i cant 100% relate to your experience i understand how difficult that can be. If you still live with your parents i hope things get better for you. I hope you find happiness and support, even if your parents dont provide that for you
The fact that Ethan referenced Unus Annus tells you that Ethan is struggling letting go of Unus Annus. It was a big deal to him and it was a big deal to all of us. I wish it didn't end.
The reason it was special is because we all knew that at the end of the year it would all be gone
@@alexunderhay6185 that doesn’t change anything, we all still wish it didn’t have to go. it had to, but that’s what made it hard
I think the most special thing about it is how difficult people are finding it to let go. It means they succeeded in their efforts to make a physical metaphor for death.
Especially since it as more popular than his channel. The hight of his career erased.
"Not suicidal, but not alive at all"
Holy shit. That's a feeling I never thought could be put into words. Even worse is when you try to describe it to someone and they either make you feel terrible for your feelings or they just shrug it off like it's nothing.
That's the problem with talking about mental health. We all have problems feeling happy and fulfilled but when other people have these problems to the point where they speak out. It some how almost always falls on deaf ears. It's a sucky thing. But the one thing we can do is our best to take care of ourselves and try to be there for others. If we care about them or not. Their a human reaching out. And I wish people remembered this. Just know your not alone. I've had to write off all my friends, all of my family including my brother I gave years of my life up to raise for my parents. But nothing I did mattered. I was lucky enough to find my wife. And she's all I need. On my bad days I have that one person to lean on. And she has her bad days as well. But community's like this help alot. Where people at least try to care. Twitch and UA-cam community's as well as reddit has probably saved my life more times than I care to mention. Sorry for the long reply. You just struck a chord with me. And I felt a need to reach out and ensure you our kind is out there. If we have nothing else in common theres a feeling of isolation that we understand others don't. And that means alot to me. So I thank you for sharing your response. This song and comment meant alot to me. And I definitely needed this today.
This^...
I guess the term is "languishing" in mental health. Stuck somewhere between surviving and thriving..
Omg I'm 14 and this is deep
EXACTLY!!!!! I have been trying to put words to it my entire adult life.
"One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies"
Memento Mori
I KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I ALMOST CRIED WHEN THAT HIT LIKE FUUUUUUUUUUCK
Hit like a sledgehammer
Shit hits hard
Memento Mori my friend :,)
@@dollsjj7481 I'm sorry but I saw just your name and your reply not the comment that is was replying to in my notification and I was like... there is so much that this could be responding to like bro LIFE hits hard
'not suicidal but not alive at all'
oh my god this hurts
Ethan...
This was the line that got me. Been feeling that a lot lately
Sounds dumb to say because everyone says it but i hope you guys feel better. This shit sucks and it’s horrible that people have to go through low times. My heart goes out to anyone that feels this way.
I have 00:00:01 permanently tattooed on my wrist. Its the thing that got me through the hardest time of my life and that i will be forever thankful for. Its not completely at zero because i can still pretend its not gone if its always at one
Lol, how poetic...
That's beautiful dude, I hope to get an unus annus tattoo one day
Well I’d say it’s not over, it dies with those who were there, it’s not over as long as one of us remembers
same, its sad how its gone.
🙏hope u doing better
"One year of creativity erased as the timer dies" I'M LITERALLY GONNA CRY... AGAIN
Even though it's gone, we will always have a shared commonality and a reason to reminisce. It's gone but won't be forgotten.
Memento mori.
Remember, the clock never stops ticking, live your life boys, enjoy it.
SAME,, I CRIED @ MARKS BIRTHDAY STREAM WHEN UNUS ANNUS WAS REFERENCED
Memento Mori......
"One year of creavity erased as the timer dies"
YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO US LIKE THAT MAN
Memento Mori
So true haha but we also have to remember that it was hard for Ethan and Mark. They created so many memories and fun times that will never be able to be seen again.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Legit 😤😭
It had to be done, it was to powerful
“The one thing that gave you hope
You have to say goodbye
One year of creativity
Erased as the timer dies.” Damn.
I miss Unus Annus
feels like a unnus annus reference but this song seems too serious for that
I wasn't ready
@@faeyarosethorne2716 well I think they could be a serious reference though, bc if you think about it he spent an entire year doing so many different unique things with Mark and sharing it with people, and then having it suddenly end and all the work they put into it is gone except for their memories of it
@@kayladanforth9201 ah yea fair
@@kayladanforth9201 my thoughts exactly. It was exactly one year that was literally erased as the timer hit zero. It seems pretty black and white to me. Pun not intended.
reading these comments with ethan singing in the background is a whole other feeling. it hurts while also somehow being comforting in a twisted way and its just such a funny feelinf (badum chhh im sorry im not good with feelings) but there arent even words to express everything i want to
Hello to seem awesome and funny and thoughtful I'm only two of those things but we should be friends
You *
@@beansheffy5557 sorry for answering late but i'd love to be friends
Exactly
I fully agree with you. Even as I'm watching it again years later.
*"Not suicidal, but not alive at all.."*
*Ow..shot to the heart, Ethan...*
Instantly cried
“Hold back tears when your parents try to call” that punched me in the gut, I’m so sorry Ethan. I can only imagine how terrible it’s been for you. I know people hate it when people call them brave, but holy shit. The transparency in this song is admirable, you’re such an amazing guy
I love the vid but it’s a cover the original is by bo burham (I can’t spell his last name) check him out
@@picklerikshit4734 I know, I haven’t watched inside yet because of busy lives
@@chaosandtealeaves cool I read the description box and I think he changed some of the lyrics I’ll check
@@chaosandtealeaves yup he changed the lyrics . But still both versions hit deep
He said he's fine :) just channeled feelings from the past year.
“One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies” this hit me like a fucking truck. a lot of points in this hit me really hard. like i didnt anticipate getting teary eyed but here i am crying
im gonna flood the room with that line 😭😭
Honestly I litterally started bawling
Unus Anus
Memento Mori my friend. This is one talented kid we've got here (He's older than me, but still)
Bo Burnham did such a great job with this. His special was phenomenal 😍 Eef covering this song was great!
"One year of creativity erased..." hits me more than just Unus Annus. I was part of a large writing/role playing group for a year and a day. We met nearly every single day to write and create a world together. By the one year mark, there was a lot of fighting among a few of us and it became so bad that I finally had to escape and left the group. We had a webpage built to keep track of lore and characters and I went back to gather my characters' information only to find things I spent time on erased and changed. It hurts so much to have something you once loved so much become a wild, increasingly foggy memory with not much left to show for it, no matter how it ends. I'm still searching for a new passion, and I hope all the others out there searching for a new one may find one or many to love.
Thank you for sharing this beautiful rewrite, Ethan
Shit, that got personal
@@ParadoxFree yeahhhhhh it sure did
I hope you’re doing ok, sometimes things really hurt
@@waddellar Nah, it wasn't that
i relate so hard tbh 😭 me and my old friend group would make dnd campaigns together, and I was the dungeon master in a lot of them, but it feels bitter revisiting any of the ideas bc of the memories associated w them. it really was a wonderful year of creativity, all gone now
Everyone's talking about the lyrics, but no ones talking about Ethan's amazing singing
Ikr! He's really good
He is really good at singing!! I love him
His voice is amazing. I need more. Lol
Bro I’m going to listen to this later while I’m listening to music
Ok but that sigh at the end where he sounded like he was choking back tears.
Alternate title: Ethan rewrites a Bo Burnham song and makes his entire fanbase cry their eyes out.
We love ya Ethan, everything will be fine
"One Year Of Creativity, Erased As The Timer Dies."
That Hurt.
Edit: Why does this have this many likes bro.
yes it was a shot to the heart and a big tug on the strings
BRB crying in my unus annus shirt
@Shiba because its... about unus annus
@Shiba it is ab Unus Annus
I got tears in my eyes when he said it lol
"Never clean the dishes cuz you only eat alone."
Me: *Grabs chest in pain* "Heart! What're you doing?!"
Heart: "FEELING!!!"
I’m sorry…. All I thought of was the scene in the grinch 😭😭😭✋🏼
Welp. There's that funny feeling.
I love seeing how many people Bo Burnham has inspired with his newest special. His songs truly struck a deep chord that resonates so strongly with how people have felt this past year and a half especially.
I KNOW! It's insane seeing this as a huge Bo Burnham fan. I'm glad that Bo put out another special and that he's getting closure from well known people.
The sheer amount of people talking about his special really surprised me
My fiancee passed away this month. She got me into Unus Annus last year. Every single day, we'd share the new videos with each other. We watched the finale together while cuddling in a hotel room, trying not to cry. It meant so much back then.. but now? I only had a year with her as my girlfriend. One year. She loved Ethan and Mark, and loved showing me her youtube interests. We bonded over you guys so much. We were going to get matching tattoos, do an Unus Annus themed wedding, etc. Thank you for being a part of making something that can bring people closer together, and remind us our time is finite. Those memories with her are all I have now, and I'll never forget them. I loved her so much. Thanks, Eef. I love you.
i'm sorry for your loss hun
I can't imagine that pain just yet but I know it hurts, for many 2020 is a year to remember for sadly more reasons than just covid. And yeah, things might not go back to the way they were, but god damn it they will be better.
I'm so sorry 💔 I can't imagine losing my fianceé.
Hang on 💜
Jesus man, that hit me really deep. I'm very sorry for your loss. My fiancee has cancer and i struggle with that a lot, i can't imagine losing her.
We come out stronger through the tough times than we went into them.
Momento mori and respects to your fiancée
“One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies” I’m actually sobbing my eyes out.
@@theunusual5018 what-
@@theunusual5018 obviously we know. It's a cover with changed lyrics for venting, clearly. Don't you get that? Also this line is about Unus Annus
Memento mori 🤍🖤
time stamp?
@@kookiemosre1462 Alr hold on
I feel like Ethan has been struggling with depression a lot since Unus Annus ended.
I hope he's alright.
He kinda did say that in his Memento Mori video the other day, but he also said that he's coming terms with it
"Not suicidal, but still not alive at all"
Yikes that cut deeper than needed
Nice pfp
@@alinaconley71 thnx urs is pretty nice too
Very good way to put how I've always felt. "Don't wanna die, I just feel like I don't exist or don't wanna exist."
Why is like no one taking about "A year of creativity erased as the timer dies." That hit me so hard I miss Unus Annus
It’s one thing that gave him hope, and now he has intrusive thoughts he peaked at 24 💔
I miss it too
OMG NOOO
Where I live it was super late when it ended and I fell asleep, missing the ending. When I woke up I realized what happened and started crying. I really didn't want to miss it but I did, I went to the channel in my subscriptions and there was nothing. The only evidence of it was reuploads and screenshots I'd taked. It hurt but I had to move on with my day.
@@skribblet. aaw nu I'm sorry
"Not suicidal, but still not alive at all." Damn that struck a chord, basically been me my whole life.
"I don't want to live like this, but I don't want to die." Harmony Hall by Vampire Weekend
Here after 3 years later, the thought that this day, November 15th was the birth of Unus Annus is so somewhy depressing but great at the same time.
I'm really loving all of these self-written verses people are writing to this song. Bo really gave a lot of people a song to vent their feelings through, and I love that. Bo is a musical genius, not just comedy-wise, and so is Ethan.
@WANT S[Е]Х - check my vidео ! no thanks I play minecraft
@@jakedoesmemes Thank you so fucking much
@@OathkeeperAlexiel I’m just doing my part
"Not suicidal but not alive at all"
This is honestly one of the most heartbreaking and relatable lyrics I've heard in a while.
Ethan, this is beautiful, all the love and support man. Hope your doing well.
ethan has said he's doing a lot better fortuantely! this is just based around his feelings from the past year
@@nehakeagy3352 ofc!
thats good! glad to hear he's doing better
phew. i'm really glad
Don’t let them notice you faked another smile
"One year of creativity erased as the timer dies"
As a [REDACTED] fan this hit hard. And I can only imagine how hard it was for Ethan and Mark to say goodbye.
hey my name is [REDACTED]
Unus. Annus. Remember it. Remember its name. Remember why it existed. Memento Mori.
“No more self-improvement cause you’re not allowed to grow” is such a good line. To me, it had two meanings.
Cancel culture refusing to really look at if somebody has changed.
And the constant infantilization of Ethan. He is an adult, and still a lot of his fans see and treat him as a kid. A perfect example is when he posted a picture of his dinner and everyone was acting like “there’s no way this sweet child could cook something, who let him near the stove, he’s gonna burn himself uwu” and it’s fucked up. Forced infantilization isn’t fun in the best of times, but compounded by thousands of people treating him like he can’t take care of himself, it must be so much worse.
I think both of those meanings are definitely relevant
most of the time people infantilize people with ADHD
@@pixelatedtoast or if the person is just Asian. It's kinda sad really. 🥲
Welcome to the world of neurodivergent people, where we're infantilized constantly and people think we're giant babies that need 24/7 supervision and guidance despite growing up and going through horrible traumas that mature us like everybody else.
@@chubbybunny6975 literally though
"Give them any hope you had, and starve for just a while"
that hurted.
same 😞 but that just a while turns into years if you dont give yourself clear time limits
it really did
It took me listening to this song like 7 times to realize he was talking about himself then I just completely went blank. We forget that people with platforms have problems too and it’s not fair.
I 100% agree with you. There were some bits where he talks about the struggle of losing Unus Annus. So many people think Mark and Ethan don't struggle with that as much as they do, which is frustrating. It was an amazing creation, but it was deleted with good intention, despite the sorrow it brought.
Theres also a big bit about unnus annus but yeah
@@evan3732 yeah I heard that and it was really hard for him and mark to just delete one year of hard work
Capitalism, basically
its about the world too
I think the reason Ethans version hits harder for most of us because we know more about Ethan and not as much about Bo. We connect with Ethan because we've seen more of him and we know more about him. We connect with him because he's shared a lot of his life with us, he's closer to many of our ages. We know the things he's referencing and have similar struggles.
In short, we just connect with him more and understand what he's singing about
Just my personal thoughts, if you disagree that's ok. I would love to hear other opinions though on what you all think too
I think it's also compounded by the fact that Bo seems to be speaking of the impending doom of the world weighing and dragging on not only himself, but the collective, while Ethan is speaking more to the personal weight of life on an individual level.
I actually know more about Bo than Ethan as I've been obsessed with Bo since last year. Both songs are equally hitting hard in their own way. Ethans songs about personal life, how it's hard growing up. Bo's is about the world, how everything's fucked and there's not much to do about it. Personally I like Bo's version more as I'm more focused on how the world is just shithouse, but sometimes when I think about to myself I enjoy Ethans more.
@@BitterJoyXx same
@@BitterJoyXx I've followed Bo's career since his early UA-cam days (we are from the same state and he was gaining local recognition back then before he got a wider audience) and Ethan's since he first started appearing on Markiplier's channel, so from someone who has seen them both through their best and worst times and through all that they've put online and out into the world about themselves and their struggles, both versions hit my heart hard. Bo's does speak more to the world at large than to his personal struggles, however both are difficult and heavy and deep.
I agree, both resonate with me, but I feel the personal problems are much harder to face, you can know exactly what's wrong and still not be able to get past your problems by your self, but the world has a chance to change, yes it's terrible but it's so much easier to see the world getting better then seeing yourself get better which made me like Ethan's version much better, every word spoke to me. Not saying we can't get better, just saying it's easier to invision a better world then a better self.
“Days go by in seconds cause you lost your sense of time” really sunk in with me
Go watch the original by no Burnham. Even sadder somehow
"Peaked at 24", the Unus Annus line, and "not suicidal but not alive at all" hit... way too hard, holy shit. Incredible job Ethan
Edit: This comment was to let Ethan know how much I appreciated his performance (performance, which means him singing the song, not the song itself; I saw the credits, I know it's Bo's), not to have a discussion about what meant what, please stop commenting random stuff on this, lol.
24 episodes into the year?
@@brightplaysgames8760 he means peaked at 24 years old
I think that whole verse is about Unus Annus
This is a song from the bo burnham special tho?
@@ludboyjolly7297 I never said it was Eef's? I saw the credits.
“One thing that gave you hope, you have to say goodbye. One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies”
...ow
Too real. UA was that for me and you really have to call me out like that.
As I get older, rewatches of this video just hit me harder and harder. A lot of the emotion is a lot more relatable to me as an adult, and it also just gets more and more clear to me how vulnerable and open he made himself for this rewrite. God damn
"Can you reach fulfillment when you're always wanting more." Hello fellow ADHD brains. Always remember that you matter.
> Always remember that you matter.
I said this in a reply to another comment, but my 21st is coming up soon, and I genuinely didn't think I'd live this long. I'm not suicidal anymore, but I still have the ideation. All the time. I want to get better but none of what makes me feel this way is in my control. Like fun fact - 500 companies are responsible for over 90% of the total carbon emissions on Earth. We're in a global heat wave right now and still a lot of people don't think climate change is real. I live in severe poverty and nothing will end that aside from a communist revolution.
I just want to know what FEELING alive is like. Just for a day.
"no more self improvement cuz youre not allowed to grow" :(
Thank you :')
this was v good ethan 😌
Oh what’s up liv
Hi liv 😌
G’day liv
omg hi girly
I think ... that other creators(or just people in general) who can relate to this could record themselves singing the same song, and perhaps it could add up to a rather meaningfull, if slightly sad compilation of real feels.
“Never clean the dishes, cause you only eat alone
Zoom call with your therapist while scrolling through your phone”
Hit so hard wooo
thought i could listen to this again without crying months later in a less emotional state, but nope, still hits hard
I’m actually balling my eyes out
just came back to it, i always come back every couple months and give it 5 extra views lol never stops giving me chills and tears
Just came back to it cause I was feeling sad and I’m now balling my eyes out
You’re doing great, Ethan.
thank you this is ethan second account im good thank
i lost my credit car can you send me your pls
@@qsettee Ew.
@@KissableStrawberry ok
@@qsettee scammer. Report
“Oops all bangers”
- Ethan and Mark
Best comment. I love this!
don’t forget amy!!
your right in saying that but i think amy said "oops all bangers"
😢
Memento mori, my friend, memento mori.
"Not suicidal but still not alive at all"
I think that line alone can describe the way a lot of people have been feeling, especially this last year with this whole pandemic.
We love you Eef, we hope you're ok and that you stay safe!
i come back to this every once in a while ever since 2021. this cover will always hit a special place in my heart
“A year of creativity, erased as the timer dies.” NOOOOOO NOT THE UA REFERENCE 😭😭😭😫😫
Edit: Momento Mori
Your name and profile pic are amazing
ahhshagshahaah
Crippling sadness ensues
I literally had to stop the video and cry😭
It made me tear up
"A year of creativity stolen as the timer died"
.oh shit-
Lyrics
Your in the life you dreamed about
you made your parents proud
Now go suppress your anxiousness
and say "hi" to the crowd
Don't let them notice
That you've faked another smile
give them any hope you had
and starve just for a while
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
Murder Hornets
Deadly Virus
Bush Fires
And The Wall
Scroll right past the post
about the shooting at the mall
Updates with your parents
Group morale is getting low
No more self-improvement
Cause you're not allowed to grow
The one thing that gave you hope
you have to say goodbye
One year of creativity
erased as the timer dies
Endless doubts, Intrusive thoughts
You've peaked at 24
Can you reach fulfillment
When you're always wanting more
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
Never ending twitter feed
Never ending likes
Realize you've lost passion
as the numbers start to rise
Never clean the dishes
cause you only eat alone
Zoom call with your therapist
While scrolling through your phone
Total dissociation
Fully out your mind
Days go by in seconds
cause you've lost all sense of time
Hold back your tears each time
your parents try to call
Not suicidal
but still not alive at all
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
(sigh)
*One year of creativity
UA reference :')
ah bless😫🙏🏽🙏🏽
@@ayesha8387 fixed
Thank you!!
Thank you
Felt fitting to come back to this after the one year anniversary. Reminds me even more that as hard as it was for us to let Unus Annus go, it was 10 times harder for Mark and Ethan. Momento Mori
"no more self improvement, cause you're not allowed to grow" felt like such a callout to the people on twitter who cancel everyone, and I loved it.
hope you're doing ok man I love you
Exactly! I've had two of my favorites cancelled last year and had so many sleepless and tearful nights because of this shit! It really became that bad that I've started to really doubt myself 😖
@@tetehenkes one of my fav singers got legit cancelled last year, in which it has been a joke now 😞
Y’all cancel culture isn’t real.
But.. if you looked at the description you'd see it was a rewrite from bo burnhams show "inside"... doesn't mean its not good but i think its based off of that.
@Emily Hume No...NO!!! NO THAT CANT BE REAL NO!!
fuck man. i’m crying so hard at 3 am. that “not suicidal, but still not alive at all” really got to me. i hope you’re okay man.
what the hell, it says you commented this 7 hours ago, and it says this was posted 5 minutes ago
@@helmit_kid9755 I think it was only available to members for a while
Agreed
Ikr
@@helmit_kid9755 it was unlisted for a while lol
This last year made us all mature awfully bloody fast, didn't it.
It absolutely did
Shiz it do be true
Since majority people didn't wake up, we have to be forced awake.
Grew like 4 years in a year.
Or else made some even more immature
LYRICS:
You're in the life you dreamed about
You made your parents proud
Now go suppress your anxiousness and say hi to the crowd
Don't let them notice that you faked another smile
Give them any hope you had and starve just for a while
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
Murder hornets Deadly virus Bushfires and the wall
Scroll right past the post about the shooting at the mall
Updates with your parents
Group morale is getting low
No more self improvement cause you're not allowed to grow
One thing that gave you hope you have to say goodbye
One year of creativity erased as the timer dies
Endless doubt and intrusive thoughts
You've peaked at 24
Can you reach fulfilment when you're always wanting more
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
Never ending twitter feed never ending likes realize
You've lost passion as the numbers start to rise
Never clean the dishes cause you only eat alone
Zoom call with your therapist while scrolling through your phone
Total disassociation fully out your mind
Days go by in seconds cause you've lost all sense of time
Hold back your tears each time your parents try to call
Not suicidal but still not alive at all
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
There it is again
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
That funny feeling
thank you
“One year of creativity erased as the timer dies” I guess he’s still as hurt about [redacted] ending as we are😢
Yeah, the pain will never stop. Although I get their message, it's so hard to let go of it for some reason, even though it's just a UA-cam channel, it felt like a comfort zone 😕
He's still morning [redacted] I know I am...that was his baby and now it's gone...
Hey, sorry for asking but what’s [redacted]?
@@ohspono memento Mori
@@Danny-wn1gn Memento Mori, brother.
“Not suicidal, but still not alive at all” cut deep. Sending love and support and this was amazing thank you
Fr bro haven't had an ounce of actual feelings in years
“give them any hope you had and starve just for a while” damn.
It's literally what I do because I don't want people to worry I understand that verse to heart
TFW When someone tells you how you hurt yourself and you're just now realizing. Fuck. Existence is suffering, where's the reward for all the pain?
@@holdupnowyall I mean if you believe in God at least you can think about the fact you could go to heaven to stay motivated
@@ducks125 this is the worst advice
That shakey sigh at the end broke my heart. We love you, Ethan. Thank you for doing everything you do. And remember, if you need to take another break for your mental health, do it! Your mind and body are more important than pushing yourself to make content.
“No more self improvement, because you’re not allowed to grow”, and “not suicidal, but still not alive at all”. Those two lines are just my life right now. “Days go by in seconds 'cause you've lost all sense of time” is true for me as well, days either go by like a snap, or drag on forever, and I just feel l8ke I’m stuck in an endless hole of suffering at all times
Yeah agreed. I don't really feel like doing much, so I do nothing all day then it's over.
@@RandomUserYTisFailing I don't think it's quote as Literal as someone isn't allowing you to grow necessarily. That line means a lot to me personally cause I'm stuck in a place where everything is kinda all the same, so it's hard for me to improve because nothing is really getting me to improve if that makes sense???
@@doubleagente It does make sense. I;m in a similiar place in my life. a lot of uncertainty but also stagnant if that makes sense.
"Don't let them notice that you faked another smile" and "Not suicidal but still not alive at all" hit deeper than I can explain
"Don't let them notice that you've faked another smile"
To be honest Ethan this hit me hard like a cement block hitting my head. I fake a smile almost every time.
Me to.
Sometimes I think to myself about how I wanted to be an actor. Then I think of how I act every second of my life.
They can’t know
same, it's to the point where people think i'm lying when i reach out. honestly wished i could tell people sooner.
Revisiting this after the Outtakes were posted by Bo is like a punch to the gut.
"Days go by in seconds cause you've lost all sense of time
....
Not suicidal but still not alive at all "
manages to make me cry more now than it did 9 months ago when I first watched this
Everything got better and worse all at the same time
That funny feeling never leaves does it?
Someone let bo know, he has to know how inspiring "inside" was
I think he's seen so many things be born from INSIDE and all his effort reaching people so deeply, he probably could never see it all honesty
@@izzybell3349 of course not but I would love to see him go on a podcast and check out some of what his fans have made, maybe he'd go back on the h3h3 podcast at some point
"one year of creativity, erased as the timer die"
see i was already sad but you didn't have to remind me of unus annus😭😭😭😭
( sad chanting ) unus anus...
I literally gasped when I heard that line
I KNOW
@@madblob4680 💀
Unus annus
This hits home especially the intrusive thoughts and suicidal bits.
same here. hope you're doing okay.
I hope your both doing good! If you need to vent I'm here!
Seriously yeah
It's a really long story-
I am so sorry for u beano! Hope u feel better, I am always here to talk!
I just realized this was a rewrite and now I'm crying more.
"Days go by in seconds 'cause you've lost all sense of time" hit me really hard. I've been stuck in a depressed state for as long as I can remember and one of the things I've always struggled with is time.
me too :(
Me too, my calendar has been stuck on May because I can’t find a reason to change it if the months go by so quickly, by the time I even change it, it’ll already be may of next year.
@@Milfzwelcome that’s the same with me, the calendar in my room I feel like I JUST changed it to may two days ago but it’s almost July
@@torimackenzie6673 yeah, hope you have a great day though!
@@Milfzwelcome you as well!! Even though we probably won’t know which day it is :)
"give them any hope you had and starve just for awhile" nothing could describe that funny feeling like this line.
"Holding back your tears each time your parents try to call, not suicidal but still not alive at all" oof owie ouch, thats too close
The not suicidal but still not alive at all really got me. This past year has really made me realize the difference of being alive and feeling alive. Just being alive is just to survive and feeling alive is actually living. Love you so much. Your videos have kept me going this past year.
"the one thing that gave you hope, you have to say goodbye, one year of creativity erased as the timer dies" hi it's 4 am and I'm fucking sobbing
What is is talking about again? I forget.
@@jakirokotaro4311 unus annus
Really sounds like him and mark need to work together again. I’m a bit worried about Ethan feeling alone, and mark has always seemed to help with that.
The transparency in this song is admirable. You've grown so much, Ethan
You do know this isn't his song, right?
@@ZethDee he re wrote the lyrics! chords are by bo burnham, lyrics by ethan (except for the chorus)
@@itsj4_ I am dumb.
Did he just say that Unus Annus helped him forget about everything he's talking about?? Funny that this video was uploaded on one of my worst depressive days
I am sorry you're going through sad times. I hope everything gets better soon. Sending hugs❤❤❤
see but i decide to watch it when i’m having a panic attack and now i’m crying profusely, we both committed an act of crime on ourselves.
Hope you are alright
@@cwisqy_ when I listened to this I was around my family and they don't know about the depression so I had to hide how I was feeling. Very big acts of crimes against ourselves. Hope you're doing okay.
@@kirstin3573 i’m at my brothers bday party and my uncles family doesn’t know so yeah i feel your pain, i hope you’re doing well, if you need anything i’ll be happy to listen
You’re probably feeling alone in life Ethan but just know we are all here for you. Your line ‘peaked at 24’ is just a thought your brain put in your head. You are still growing as a person and we’re all gonna be here with you as you continue to grow. We love you Ethan!!!
"A year of creativity erased as the timer dies" 🤍🖤
I was only able to catch that line the second time I watched the video, it was a great addition to the song :)
memento mori 🥺🖤🤍
memento mori 🖤🤍
Memento mori my friend :(
momento mori
Memento Mori
"No more self improvement because you're not allowed to grow." Has this pandemic stunted anyone else as their lives were about to start? I've made no progress in 2 years
I started college as a straight a student and failed out in my second semester. I've never felt worse than I do right now. The pandemic really did fuck us all.
@@saltedsage I’m really sorry to hear that, even putting aside the tragedy of mass illness and death, it’s messed up people’s lives so much. I haven’t seen my bf in years because we’re in different countries and my job has been put on hold because it’s still illegal to travel, I’m just getting poorer and less experienced against my peers
I was about to start college, then covid happened and I couldn't face starting it in an online setting. Then I got attacked by somone in my life and kicked out by my mom. Now I'm trying to build my life again from the ashes but it's tough man. I have a job but I"m totally alone no friends. it's been a rough year for everyone.
@@parisofhades7348 "It's never too late" is one of those cliche sayings but I thought about that alot... Started college in 2013 and failed because of various factors and no direction/desires. Felt like everyone would shame me, etc. I wallowed in a state of confusion and depression for a bit and had given up hope. Then, I told a family friend who I trust that and he reacted differently from all the other people in my life who silently judged that I flunked out. He said, with a contagious smile, "I was in your shoes not long ago you know.. It's never too late." It brought hope back that I may still have a chance at making something of my life regardless of the time I lost and suddenly time became irrelevant in my decisions from then on. I decided to explore in community college classes without worrying about majors and requirements. Got interested in a different major than before and followed through. Graduated May 2020 just before the pandemic and managed to get hired couple months into the pandemic because I never let that interest go and it showed in interviews. So, when stepping back out of the current time and looking back 4 years, I went from complete dispair, feeling hopeless and out of control to being on a track where I get to grow professionally and intellectually. Just by really embracing that it's never too late, for anything. Hope this personal experience can bring some lost hope back
@@saltedsage I graduated in 2020. Didn't get a prom, didn't get to do what I wanted before graduating, didn't get a graduation. And I dropped out of College my first year cause I couldn't handle online college. I understand the feeling. I'm so sorry
“Not suicidal, but not alive at all.”
Can definitely relate to this line A LOT. The pandemic has brought any and all self-esteem has been lost and has fallen dramatically. I had goals to lose weight but lack of motivation and depression wouldn’t let me. It got to the point where I just felt dead inside
Feels pretty similar for me too
I think we're all dead inside. We're just star actors at hiding it.
the pandemic made me feel dead inside and i kinda still am cause of that virus
This is an accurate representation of depression….. and painfully relatable. Also haha nice shirt i love that game.
Oh yeah, it definitely is. I got hit hard during Covid and I don't think my family and friends quite understand that I still haven't recovered, that I don't feel I'll ever recover. Also, I love that game too!
“One year of creativity, erased as the timer dies” My heart hurts
"Not suicidal but not alive at all" - that hit. Also losing time and days are blurry. I have felt that all through my adulthood. I'm 25 and already had burnout at my last job. You hit the right spot with that Ethan and that with a truly beautiful song. Thank you for that.
Im 32.... and realized after reading this comment, this started when I was just a teen.
@@jakibraze Can totally relate.. it's crazy.
Same
why does this make me want to cry but gives the feeling of comfort
his voice
Because you know the feeling. It's like the feeling of realizing that "home" is no longer the place where you rest and prepare for the future, it's where you decay.
"Never before have we been so connected, yet ever felt so alone"
Everyone is singing the same song, but we can't harmonize. What Ethan did here, was exactly that. He broke through to you.
@@theordinary1059 Shit. This hits deep because I was living at home (14-15yo) during covid last year and went further and further downhill until i went to hospital for a week and now I'm in a different place because back home, i was decaying
that funny feeling
@@ilikebreadsticks1880 Same bro im 14/15 and my family life isnt bad but I went through 5 years unconnected with my own mother and now that I'm with her it doesnt connect the same way espiaclly through covid, keep going man much love
"No more self improvement because you're not allowed to grow"
I hate how relatable that feels